A stupid story

ok so full story

backstory and important stuff
first thing to mention is in dungeon world you roll 2 d6's instead of a d20. lowers the chance of crit successes or fails happening but that didn't stop us

edgelord character's only real bonds were to a 13 year old girl he accidentally summoned while stuttering during a completely different spell. she apparantly died in the actual session 2. whoops

at one point, the cleric summoned a whole bunch of forest animals for a boss fight which didn't end up happening, afterwards he had them all in one place so he just made them fight each other
DM rolled nat 12 for one of them. imagine the killer rabbit from monty python, but he's very clearly bigger and more buff

so when I got in (playing a bard, seemed fun. still does) we found what was supposed to be a rest area, but after the dm rolled an 11 on it, it ended up being one of the largest dungeon types in the game

last session one character got a ruby, today, as a meme, he asked the DM if it as the red stone of aja from jojo, dm got a nat 12 and - surprise - it is. basically, if you slot it in a stone mask and put it on, you lose all your humanity but become the Ultimate Being

so, onto todays session

explore a little, find a hidden room behind a statue and go in
there's a chest in there and a bunch of living statues across the walls, cleric puts on his invisibility cloak and grabs the while edgelord shows off some parlor tricks for the statues
they're really impressed by his black fire spells, they want to give him the chest but get mad after they realize it's not there and they all assume that one of the others is responsible
and while they're arguing the edgelord kills them and uses their souls as decoration for his armor since he has a soul-cutting sword and can do that
poke around some more in the rest of the dungeon, little while later we find a room with a chest and nothing else. its a mimic and eats anything it touches. so we chuck a bomb at it to kill it, and we go down the tunnel it was apparently on top of. also edgelord finds a few souls in the mimic that it apparently ate so now his sword's even more powerful

we go down the tunnel and it's an almost identical room, but this time the chest is real
we find a bunch of good shit in it after the dm rolled a nat 12. 34k gold, few emeralds we can use for spell enhancements, some other good stuff. and a stone mask.

so a few of us decide this thing is SUPER dangerous and we should leave it. but while the rest of us are arguing over it, the cleric grabs the mask, sticks the stone of aja in it, and chucks it at his rabbit.

after a number of really good rolls, the cleric is *almost* able to control the thing. Got an 11 on the last one when he needed a 12. but edgelord has a spell that can create a perfect roll if he sacrifices something. the dm tells him it can be a nat 12 but only if he sacrifices all his memories of that 13 year old girl, except her dying. So for the good of all the people the rabbit would kill, he agrees and becomes the ULTIMATE edgelord. almost immediately after, a giant monster burrows up right beside him - but it throws me a rainbow lute before being deleted. the dude stabbed him with his soul-sword and it just exploded. We see a dark glint in his eye, he tips his fedora (which was actually one of the souls from earlier) and teleports away. Then we hear an explosion, which turned out to be the airship we took to get there. Then he teleports behind one of our party members and says 'nothin personnel, kid' but doesn't actually do anything since his turn's over.

so we all run, one person makes the mistake of running toward the cliff created by the burrowing monster because he didn't realize it was one (we were using popsicle sticks as a map, he thought it was another wall) and gets charged by the edgelord, who misses and falls off the cliff. so with a few moments to think, we realize that if he can regain his humanity, he'll stop trying to kill us all. with two characters in the party who can do that and two really good rolls, the 13 year old girl is back again...but the edgelord just fell off a cliff and doesn't realize. Plus, something needs to be sacrificed in order to complete the resurrection. The dm tells us that it has to be one PC and our airship, though we don't know it's already been destroyed. So, since it was my second session and nobody else was willing, the guy the edgelord charged decides it'll be him, but he's not going down without a fight.

He jumps down after the edgelord and uses all his abilities at once, and through some buffing from me and my new magic lute and the dm allowing him to swing his rocket powered hammer 10 times before exploding, he does a total of 846 damage. Don't forget he's at level 5 when this happens.

I should mention now - earlier in the session he communed with his god, a character from an older campaign him and the dm did, who was basically a stoner who lived with his parents in Colorado, who thought that his visions of the guy were just hallucinations. Long story. But this particular stoner's dad worked at a satellite company, and an 11 was rolled from the effects of the commune. So after dealing 846 damage in one turn, him, the edgelord, and the entire dungeon were annihilated by an orbital laser. The rest of the party (and the chest with 34k gold) was teleported away into limbo since one of our other characters can do that.

And that's where the session ended. With two PC's dead, one resurrected, a cleric with a rabbit stand named 「White Judgement」 and me with a magic lute.

also one of our party members almost beat watch for rolling rocks in half an A press.

This game's a fuckin trip