Kelet (2020) EN

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00:00:05,000 --> 00:00:15,000
INDOXXI
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When we were children and fed up
with our small neighbourhood -

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we used to come to this forest
and wander around.

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We didn't know anyone here.

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We didn't have to
pretend at all.

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If I had done
what others wanted me to do -

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I don't know
if I'd still be alive.

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00:02:12,580 --> 00:02:14,540
Sometimes I think
I don't even know -

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who I really am.

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You're going to get it...
Just be calm. You're great.

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00:03:02,500 --> 00:03:04,540
Don't think about winning
or anything.

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00:03:04,740 --> 00:03:07,780
I feel I just want to
have some fun.

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I don't care if I win or lose.

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Today I just want to
have a blast.

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We've really invested in this.
Big time.

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Bitch, we got this!

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That's good, that's very good.
I can't even breathe.

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Yes, bitch!

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In folklore a mermaid
is an aquatic creature -

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with the head and
upper body of a human -

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and the tail of a fish.

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Are you a real mermaid?

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00:04:14,868 --> 00:04:15,868
DJ B.

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This is Ursula's
little sister, bitch!

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This is the reason
Ursula became evil!

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00:05:04,869 --> 00:05:07,909
I'm beautiful,
I'm beautful damn it.

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Alright.

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Cheers bitch.

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Congratulations.

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Cheers to the
motherfucking win, bitch!

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Cheers.

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This time I didn't care
if I had lost.

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I just went there
to enjoy myself.

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Me too, exactly.

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I didn't stress at all.
- I'm happy.

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I just can't wait to take
this shit off.

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But I won 'face' anyway...!

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You won drag, I won face, bitch.

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I made that face.

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What the hell is that?
What the fuck...?

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He's drunk.
- Don't talk to him.

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Fuck!

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Fuck you!

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We used to say we'll go to
New York when we're 20.

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We'll live and work there,
do anything we want.

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Now it feels unrealistic.
But this is close enough.

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It is good to have dreams.

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But maybe it's good to
just let them be dreams.

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They gave me this book when
I went to study in New Forest, -

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in Bournemouth.

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I was there studying biology.
I've never once read this book.

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But it looks nice on my shelf.

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I'm quite happy to
leave this place.

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I've lived here long enough.
So far away from the others.

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Before, I never bothered
leaving home.

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I lived so far
from the city centre.

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I just said 'see you tomorrow'
or 'I'm busy' -

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even if I really wasn't.

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This was my first dress.

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Still fierce.

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It was a month or so
after I had left home.

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I saw this and I bought it.

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I was afraid that someone would
see me and tell my family.

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My mother bought me this shirt.

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I'll never wear it. But I'll
always have it in my closet.

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I've always said
Kelet's fabulous.

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She's tall, she has a long neck
and nice cheekbones.

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Such a beautiful face.
And long legs.

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Every girl's dream.

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Kelet is so beautiful.

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She's beautiful.

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Even if she doesn't know it.
Or do you?

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I don't know anything.

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She's beautiful.

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She's brave.
I love that.

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Are you trying to kill me?
- Yes, I am.

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But if you die now, at least
you'll die looking fabulous.

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If someone had asked me
two or three years ago -

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I would never have said
'I'm a trans woman.'

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I would never have said
I live alone.

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That I don't talk to my parents.

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My family lives in Manchester.

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We moved there eight years ago.

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I guess we just needed
a change of scenery.

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All I know, I hated it.
Every second.

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00:10:35,300 --> 00:10:37,580
Are you serious?
You're going like that?

86
00:10:38,100 --> 00:10:40,260
You're going to wear that
all night?

87
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Are you serious?
Can you even breathe?

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They'll scream your name
and you'll have to vogue.

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Oh my god, girl.

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We were called f******.
We were called n******

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We didn't belong. So
we created our own world.

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With our own rules.

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And you know what happened?
Magic.

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00:11:21,447 --> 00:11:22,985
And now with us, with Vogue.

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The iconic Mother Leiomy Amazon!

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00:11:36,715 --> 00:11:40,195
She is here, DJ Tarp.

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00:12:05,205 --> 00:12:08,900
The cover of Vogue, bitch.

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00:12:10,140 --> 00:12:12,740
I have always wanted to be
a runway model.

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00:12:14,060 --> 00:12:16,060
That's my biggest dream.

100
00:12:19,460 --> 00:12:22,420
I used to watch Iman and
Naomi Campbell videos, -

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00:12:22,580 --> 00:12:24,740
and I thought
'Oh my God, what a life!'

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Watching those
women kept me alive.

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I thought it was my only way up.

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I've applied to model agencies.

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00:12:41,420 --> 00:12:44,020
But they say they have
enough Black models.

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But thanks for your interest.

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00:13:19,900 --> 00:13:22,340
When I first told my parents
who I am, -

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00:13:22,940 --> 00:13:24,940
they told me
I'll never make it, -

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because I'm a freak.

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No one will accept me.

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They organised a meeting
where my aunt, grandmother, -

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my uncle and my parents -

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took me into a room.

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00:13:56,460 --> 00:13:58,820
And one by one everyone said -

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00:13:59,100 --> 00:14:01,300
if you choose
to follow that road, -

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00:14:01,940 --> 00:14:04,660
we won't talk to you,
we won't look at you.

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00:14:04,820 --> 00:14:07,140
We won't feed you
if you're hungry.

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Unless my father
contacts me first, -

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I won't do anything.
I don't care.

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It should be the
other way round.

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00:14:45,292 --> 00:14:47,004
What do you mean?

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00:14:48,700 --> 00:14:50,620
It will fall.

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You see?
- Yeah.

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00:14:56,260 --> 00:14:58,420
It's the other way around.

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00:15:05,620 --> 00:15:07,940
Suddenly I'm your handyman.

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00:15:09,540 --> 00:15:12,740
I don't like this at all.

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00:15:14,540 --> 00:15:16,340
Shouldn't it be
like the other one?

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I'll fix it.

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Now it's done.

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00:15:29,140 --> 00:15:31,500
Well, it's your TV,
you deal with it.

131
00:15:32,380 --> 00:15:36,060
Let's just give up, all right?
Maybe a drink will help.

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00:15:45,820 --> 00:15:48,780
Pour it in a classy way,
will you?

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00:15:56,620 --> 00:15:58,900
After that,
I need an extra big glass.

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00:16:02,420 --> 00:16:04,060
Nice.

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00:16:05,549 --> 00:16:06,549
Cheers.

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00:16:41,420 --> 00:16:43,140
Do you know how cold
it is outside?

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No, and I don't care.

138
00:16:54,540 --> 00:16:56,740
Turn it off! Oh my God!

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There goes the hair dryer...

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00:17:04,507 --> 00:17:06,773
- Oh my god.
- Oh my fucking god.

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00:17:07,100 --> 00:17:09,180
We have to figure out something.

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00:17:09,860 --> 00:17:11,420
Oh my god.

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00:17:11,700 --> 00:17:14,500
How did it manage to
suck in all this?

144
00:17:14,900 --> 00:17:16,660
Yeah, just in seconds.

145
00:17:19,780 --> 00:17:24,060
And you won't put on
any make up? Oh, wow.

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00:17:30,780 --> 00:17:33,820
These are good.
- Beautiful!

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00:17:34,060 --> 00:17:35,982
And some of these.

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00:17:36,007 --> 00:17:38,884
I'll tell you, what
they wrote me.

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00:17:38,980 --> 00:17:41,180
I'd like to present you
to these agencies, -

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00:17:41,340 --> 00:17:43,660
but first I'd like to ask
for your permission -

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00:17:44,780 --> 00:17:47,180
to show them
your Instagram photos.

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00:17:47,660 --> 00:17:50,260
Okay... I don't know...

153
00:17:52,580 --> 00:17:54,180
Why would they do that...

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00:17:54,420 --> 00:17:57,140
In some countries,
maybe it could work...

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00:17:57,420 --> 00:17:59,140
But in Finland...

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00:17:59,420 --> 00:18:02,820
Yeah. A Black trans woman.

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00:18:06,340 --> 00:18:08,140
It's a big deal.

158
00:18:12,780 --> 00:18:16,820
If I get gigs and
there is a make-up artist...

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00:18:17,940 --> 00:18:20,500
Imagine the make-up
I would have...

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00:18:21,060 --> 00:18:23,860
Do you remember,
when I told you about my school?

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The only time we learned -

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00:18:26,460 --> 00:18:28,580
to do make-up
for a Black person -

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00:18:28,740 --> 00:18:31,100
was the time
when we created characters.

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00:18:35,620 --> 00:18:38,140
You mean, you made
white people look Black?

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00:18:38,340 --> 00:18:40,060
Girl...

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00:18:40,220 --> 00:18:42,860
If I get a chance, I think
I'll do a few things here -

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00:18:43,100 --> 00:18:45,780
and then I'll go and work
in Paris or somewhere.

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00:18:46,180 --> 00:18:47,980
I'll try to get out of here.

169
00:18:48,820 --> 00:18:51,860
Though, it would be good to
have someone here, in Finland.

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00:18:52,540 --> 00:18:54,460
That's how it is...

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Dinner's ready!

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00:18:55,740 --> 00:18:57,060
Do you want some? - Okay.

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00:19:03,140 --> 00:19:06,140
You're about to become a model,
so that's all you'll get.

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00:19:07,861 --> 00:19:09,275
Diet food.

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00:19:13,380 --> 00:19:15,180
I'll get my hormone pills.

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00:19:33,580 --> 00:19:35,460
Do you take them
at a certain hour -

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00:19:35,700 --> 00:19:37,540
or when you have time?

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I should take them every morning.

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00:19:41,460 --> 00:19:43,100
What?

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00:19:43,460 --> 00:19:47,300
Well, you just have to
take them with food.

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00:19:48,001 --> 00:19:49,001
Ah, ok.

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00:20:09,420 --> 00:20:12,900
Here in Helsinki, there are
many places we have to avoid.

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For our own safety.

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00:20:21,700 --> 00:20:24,500
They shout at you
or they threaten you.

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00:20:37,580 --> 00:20:41,140
We really have to pay attention
to where we go.

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00:20:42,980 --> 00:20:44,780
And where we have our shows.

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00:21:01,460 --> 00:21:04,420
Vogue is a dance style
born many decades ago -

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00:21:04,740 --> 00:21:06,620
in the New York ballroom scene.

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00:21:08,540 --> 00:21:13,580
Rainbow and LGBT people and
people of colour came together -

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00:21:13,820 --> 00:21:16,180
in situations like the one
I had to face -

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00:21:16,420 --> 00:21:20,140
when their families found out
about their sexuality -

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00:21:20,260 --> 00:21:21,860
and didn't want them anymore.

193
00:21:25,220 --> 00:21:28,740
Now the totem...
Five, six, seven, eight.

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00:21:29,180 --> 00:21:31,260
One, two, three, four.
- Wait a second.

195
00:21:31,940 --> 00:21:33,940
I wonder why I'm doing this!

196
00:21:34,220 --> 00:21:36,900
Kelet and Lola, how about
moving your arms like this?

197
00:21:37,020 --> 00:21:40,420
So that they don't open too much.
Otherwise, they'll be like this!

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00:21:40,540 --> 00:21:42,300
Five, six, seven, eight. One...

199
00:21:53,540 --> 00:21:55,980
Kelet, wrong foot.
- It starts with left?

200
00:21:56,700 --> 00:21:58,860
Left comes on two.

201
00:21:59,380 --> 00:22:02,340
You've been doing this.

202
00:22:03,740 --> 00:22:05,460
Don't start on one.

203
00:22:05,740 --> 00:22:08,340
You're starting too early.

204
00:22:09,060 --> 00:22:11,380
But you should
do it like this.

205
00:22:13,380 --> 00:22:17,260
I don't know who I would be
if I hadn't gone down this road.

206
00:22:18,341 --> 00:22:20,408
I don't want to think about it.

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00:22:21,380 --> 00:22:26,020
I was a quiet and shy kid.
I was afraid of everything.

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00:22:26,500 --> 00:22:29,380
Sometimes I didn't even have
the courage to go to school.

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My mother taught me a lot.

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00:22:37,340 --> 00:22:40,020
But I've noticed that
the mentors and 'the mothers' -

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00:22:40,300 --> 00:22:42,460
help you navigate through life.

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00:22:44,100 --> 00:22:47,260
One teaches you how to pay bills.

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00:22:47,620 --> 00:22:49,740
And another how to do make-up.

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00:22:51,700 --> 00:22:55,020
They teach you
all kinds of things.

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00:22:55,500 --> 00:22:57,461
I know I'll screw
this up, but...

216
00:22:57,486 --> 00:22:58,844
Don't say that.

217
00:23:01,340 --> 00:23:03,620
You'll be prepared and
you won't screw up.

218
00:23:04,940 --> 00:23:08,780
I have to say, this thing is
way better than anything -

219
00:23:08,940 --> 00:23:11,620
that's happening
in the Finnish drag scene.

220
00:23:12,595 --> 00:23:14,595
No shade towards anyone.

221
00:23:16,060 --> 00:23:18,860
No one in Finland does it
the way we do.

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00:23:19,154 --> 00:23:20,154
Girl.

223
00:23:20,940 --> 00:23:23,780
Think if our wigs
come off on stage!

224
00:23:24,980 --> 00:23:27,940
It makes you feel
like you have a family.

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00:23:28,500 --> 00:23:30,340
That you are safe.

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00:23:33,820 --> 00:23:35,580
Look up.

227
00:23:36,780 --> 00:23:38,780
Today we'll be making history.

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00:23:40,420 --> 00:23:43,700
This will be
the first POC queer party -

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00:23:44,260 --> 00:23:46,020
in the history of Helsinki Pride.

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00:23:46,300 --> 00:23:50,140
The first where the organisers
are brown and people of colour.

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00:23:50,340 --> 00:23:53,260
And the target audience
is brown and people of colour.

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00:23:53,728 --> 00:23:56,128
In the spirit of
"Paris is Burning."

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00:23:56,540 --> 00:23:59,340
When you belong to a minority, -

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you'd think other minorities
would support you.

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That they would get you.

236
00:24:08,860 --> 00:24:11,060
But that's not how it is.
- No, not in here.

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00:24:11,220 --> 00:24:16,100
Then there's Vogue
and other things, -

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00:24:16,300 --> 00:24:19,340
which were born
within Black culture...

239
00:24:19,540 --> 00:24:22,780
I think the Finnish Vogue scene
is much better now.

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00:24:22,900 --> 00:24:25,020
When I first came here,
it was very small.

241
00:24:25,180 --> 00:24:27,260
Now people are interested in it.

242
00:24:28,540 --> 00:24:30,180
Ofimja was here before me.

243
00:24:30,260 --> 00:24:32,660
In the times of
Field Marshal Mannerheim.

244
00:24:41,420 --> 00:24:43,300
World War II!

245
00:24:44,940 --> 00:24:48,140
Me, Lola and Kelet are the only
trans women in this scene.

246
00:24:48,740 --> 00:24:54,020
Kelet, Lola and Roza are
the only POCs.

247
00:24:55,020 --> 00:24:58,980
You mean foreigners?
- People of colour.

248
00:24:59,660 --> 00:25:02,740
The scene is very homogeneous.

249
00:25:03,060 --> 00:25:07,140
Mostly white, cis-gendered
heterosexual women.

250
00:25:09,300 --> 00:25:11,140
And they're mostly learning it, -

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00:25:11,260 --> 00:25:15,020
as if Vogue was like
any other dance you can learn.

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00:25:16,300 --> 00:25:21,740
If it is empowering for
some women, that's great.

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00:25:23,060 --> 00:25:25,540
But if you know the background -

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00:25:25,660 --> 00:25:28,540
and what it means
to this community -

255
00:25:28,660 --> 00:25:31,300
then it's different,
it's a bitter-sweet feeling.

256
00:25:31,460 --> 00:25:33,380
We are under-represented.

257
00:25:33,500 --> 00:25:35,740
For example,
you can't do some moves -

258
00:25:35,940 --> 00:25:38,820
if you have an Adam's apple.

259
00:25:39,140 --> 00:25:41,980
You can't do this,
because it means -

260
00:25:42,220 --> 00:25:45,180
you don't have it anymore.

261
00:25:48,540 --> 00:25:51,235
Bitch, I'm gonna be hungover,
but I'm gonna get..

262
00:25:51,340 --> 00:25:53,540
No, I don't want to
drink too much tonight.

263
00:25:53,700 --> 00:25:56,340
Tomorrow's the Pride parade.

264
00:25:56,540 --> 00:25:59,620
I need to be able to walk.

265
00:26:00,380 --> 00:26:02,860
Don't start!
- Oh, I'm starting?

266
00:26:03,020 --> 00:26:06,020
Have you ever seen me start?

267
00:26:07,020 --> 00:26:08,740
What are you talking about?

268
00:26:09,255 --> 00:26:10,255
Oh, please.

269
00:26:11,540 --> 00:26:13,300
It goes like this.

270
00:26:13,383 --> 00:26:14,196
So darling.

271
00:26:14,220 --> 00:26:15,820
Oh my God, you look fabulous.

272
00:26:15,940 --> 00:26:18,220
What's this,
you have pimples...

273
00:26:18,460 --> 00:26:20,300
You always say
something like that.

274
00:26:20,420 --> 00:26:22,060
It wasn't about pimples.

275
00:26:22,260 --> 00:26:28,340
It was about facts.
I said to you, -

276
00:26:28,620 --> 00:26:31,460
you look fabulous,
but your eyebrows are bushy.

277
00:26:31,900 --> 00:26:37,620
Your eyebrows were
fucking lion-queen bushy.

278
00:26:38,900 --> 00:26:42,180
Like this, you know.

279
00:26:42,333 --> 00:26:44,413
You need to be
snatched to capacity.

280
00:26:44,474 --> 00:26:46,036
It's just the way it
is, darling, honey.

281
00:26:46,107 --> 00:26:48,724
Shade is training, bitch.

282
00:26:51,260 --> 00:26:53,940
But that's life, darling.

283
00:26:55,340 --> 00:26:59,180
Oh my God, these curls!
-Is it good or bad?

284
00:27:05,500 --> 00:27:08,740
There are no straight ones left?
- No...

285
00:27:09,700 --> 00:27:11,940
Let's try to find
some other colour.

286
00:27:12,460 --> 00:27:17,380
Kelet's brave. Kelet's beautiful.

287
00:27:18,860 --> 00:27:24,020
Kelet's patient. Kelet's smart.

288
00:27:30,650 --> 00:27:31,650
Okay.

289
00:27:36,340 --> 00:27:38,740
Does this look all right?
- You look gorgeous.

290
00:27:51,220 --> 00:27:54,978
Kelet! Kelet!

291
00:28:28,380 --> 00:28:30,380
Love belongs to everybody!

292
00:29:07,580 --> 00:29:10,500
I was thirteen when I attended
my first Pride parade.

293
00:29:15,300 --> 00:29:19,700
My dearest memory is marching
together with my brother.

294
00:29:21,100 --> 00:29:22,860
It was the moment
when we were like -

295
00:29:23,020 --> 00:29:26,900
'Are we walking in front of
all these people?'

296
00:29:32,420 --> 00:29:37,500
I miss my siblings,
especially my brother Max.

297
00:29:40,820 --> 00:29:45,860
When the family thing happened,
it was him who consoled me -

298
00:29:45,980 --> 00:29:47,740
and got me back on my feet.

299
00:29:49,420 --> 00:29:53,380
I felt I didn't belong anywhere.
I was all by myself in the world.

300
00:30:01,460 --> 00:30:07,540
Pride is also my celebration.
I have created my own space.

301
00:30:28,580 --> 00:30:30,220
I used to watch this video -

302
00:30:30,500 --> 00:30:33,700
when I was preparing
for Vogue balls.

303
00:30:34,180 --> 00:30:37,820
Her walk is so well composed.

304
00:30:41,300 --> 00:30:44,260
There's something very
captivating about her walk.

305
00:30:46,380 --> 00:30:49,940
She's just so wonderful.

306
00:30:55,700 --> 00:31:00,220
This is Tiina from the
employment agency. - Hi.

307
00:31:00,500 --> 00:31:03,380
Are you available for
shifts this week?

308
00:31:06,300 --> 00:31:08,660
My week's all empty.

309
00:31:08,900 --> 00:31:14,940
Except tomorrow and
on Thursday I'm busy.

310
00:31:16,420 --> 00:31:19,700
So, you can't come tomorrow
and on Thursday.

311
00:31:21,060 --> 00:31:24,140
And you'll have the shift
on Wednesday.

312
00:31:24,260 --> 00:31:28,300
There are more shifts
available for next weekend.

313
00:31:28,660 --> 00:31:34,540
So you can reserve
your shifts online

314
00:31:34,700 --> 00:31:36,540
if you're available.

315
00:31:36,900 --> 00:31:40,900
Okay. I will.
- Thank you. Bye!

316
00:31:48,020 --> 00:31:51,020
At some point,
I'd like to study more.

317
00:31:54,620 --> 00:31:57,740
I could continue
studying biology.

318
00:31:58,860 --> 00:32:01,340
I didn't quit it because
I didn't like it.

319
00:32:01,500 --> 00:32:07,060
It was just... I was nineteen,
I had just left home.

320
00:32:09,100 --> 00:32:15,220
I had no money, no savings.
I was all alone.

321
00:32:16,980 --> 00:32:18,940
Even if I had a job, -

322
00:32:21,580 --> 00:32:23,460
that wasn't enough.

323
00:32:23,820 --> 00:32:26,180
They paid me like
5 euros per hour.

324
00:32:29,860 --> 00:32:33,020
I haven't heard yet
from the agencies.

325
00:32:34,900 --> 00:32:38,100
They never say anything.
No idea, what they are thinking.

326
00:32:39,980 --> 00:32:44,100
I'll ask her right away.
'Hi, any news?'

327
00:32:50,380 --> 00:32:55,220
It's very frustrating to just
wait and wait -

328
00:32:55,380 --> 00:32:57,820
for months on end.

329
00:33:01,020 --> 00:33:03,740
Sometimes I just don't have
the energy for this.

330
00:33:28,060 --> 00:33:30,220
I went to job interviews.

331
00:33:31,940 --> 00:33:34,940
I wasn't trying to hide myself.
It went all right.

332
00:33:37,340 --> 00:33:39,220
But then they asked for my ID.

333
00:33:39,700 --> 00:33:44,300
And they saw it said male. The
atmosphere changed right away.

334
00:33:45,700 --> 00:33:50,060
The interview stopped at once.
I didn't get the job.

335
00:34:14,260 --> 00:34:18,180
Is this just
a waste of time and energy?

336
00:34:59,820 --> 00:35:03,020
They always have those nice
pink backdrops. - Yeah.

337
00:35:04,660 --> 00:35:08,580
At first, I thought she wanted to
take similar photos with me.

338
00:35:09,180 --> 00:35:13,580
Straight hair and everything.
- Okay. But are you comfortable?

339
00:35:13,940 --> 00:35:19,060
Yeah. With the black top.
- Girl, that's you soon.

340
00:35:19,580 --> 00:35:21,580
Imagine that.

341
00:35:23,140 --> 00:35:26,140
Lovely studio!

342
00:35:26,340 --> 00:35:27,940
When we got your message -

343
00:35:28,100 --> 00:35:30,020
Lola and I were all excited.

344
00:35:33,889 --> 00:35:35,053
Oh my god.

345
00:35:35,940 --> 00:35:38,020
She wants you to be glass.

346
00:35:39,380 --> 00:35:43,780
I'm turning into... a doll.

347
00:35:59,060 --> 00:36:01,500
Put your hand like...
That's perfect.

348
00:36:03,060 --> 00:36:05,700
And turn your face a bit...
That's it.

349
00:36:18,540 --> 00:36:20,300
It would be a lie to say -

350
00:36:20,660 --> 00:36:23,580
I've always loved the
colour of my skin.

351
00:36:25,380 --> 00:36:27,020
I don't like myself in pictures.

352
00:36:28,140 --> 00:36:30,300
People ask me,
why do you want to be a model -

353
00:36:30,420 --> 00:36:32,940
if you don't like to look
at yourself in pictures.

354
00:37:04,620 --> 00:37:07,300
I was in contact about
changing my name.

355
00:37:07,780 --> 00:37:10,980
That will cost you 25 euros.

356
00:37:12,140 --> 00:37:16,860
Why exactly do you want this
particular first name?

357
00:37:17,020 --> 00:37:20,860
This is not a registered name
in Finland.

358
00:37:21,460 --> 00:37:25,300
That's why we need
additional information.

359
00:37:28,540 --> 00:37:30,180
Okay.

360
00:37:36,620 --> 00:37:43,460
Is the name common in the country
where you have family ties?

361
00:37:44,660 --> 00:37:46,580
What does your name mean
in Finnish?

362
00:37:53,060 --> 00:37:56,020
Well, mine's not a common name...

363
00:38:01,900 --> 00:38:04,260
I'll just make something up.

364
00:38:04,420 --> 00:38:08,020
'Kelet is
a Somali name that means'

365
00:38:08,380 --> 00:38:10,260
What could it be?

366
00:38:13,900 --> 00:38:15,740
Well, it's unique,
to say the least.

367
00:38:15,820 --> 00:38:17,980
I've never met
anyone called Kelet.

368
00:38:30,580 --> 00:38:36,020
The process is now underway.
- Excuse me?

369
00:38:36,540 --> 00:38:39,380
The process is now underway.
- All right.

370
00:38:39,540 --> 00:38:42,820
You'll let me know then.
- Yes.

371
00:38:54,940 --> 00:38:59,620
I can't even remember
what they look like.

372
00:39:00,820 --> 00:39:03,460
I've changed so much.
That's obvious.

373
00:39:19,142 --> 00:39:20,540
Please have your boarding card

374
00:39:20,565 --> 00:39:23,406
and open passport
ready for inspection.

375
00:39:46,260 --> 00:39:47,860
Say hello to my brother.

376
00:39:49,900 --> 00:39:52,700
It's weird to see each other
after three years, -

377
00:39:53,340 --> 00:39:55,060
and to see where we are now.

378
00:39:55,220 --> 00:39:56,940
I'm so happy you're here now.

379
00:39:57,100 --> 00:39:58,700
Honestly.

380
00:40:02,020 --> 00:40:03,900
We've literally switched roles.

381
00:40:04,020 --> 00:40:06,220
Why couldn't I
just get the coochie?

382
00:40:09,860 --> 00:40:11,820
What was I saying?

383
00:40:12,580 --> 00:40:14,340
Then we both came out -

384
00:40:14,620 --> 00:40:16,820
and we just got so much closer,
didn't we?

385
00:40:17,700 --> 00:40:24,260
I came out to you. And you were
like 'Oh my goodness', -

386
00:40:25,540 --> 00:40:27,860
this whole fucking family
is full of queers.

387
00:40:28,220 --> 00:40:30,780
And I was like 'what'?
'What do you mean?'

388
00:40:31,740 --> 00:40:35,420
Normally you have
a gay sister or a brother.

389
00:40:36,140 --> 00:40:38,700
But when one is trans
and the other is also trans...

390
00:40:38,860 --> 00:40:40,580
That's quite ... random.

391
00:40:40,740 --> 00:40:42,620
We're going through
the same thing.

392
00:40:43,420 --> 00:40:46,500
Because we can talk about this
without feeling awkward.

393
00:40:47,580 --> 00:40:51,180
A couple of months from now,
we're going to look like...

394
00:40:53,740 --> 00:40:57,340
I just started a month ago.
- Really?

395
00:40:57,460 --> 00:40:59,380
Me, eight months.

396
00:40:59,540 --> 00:41:03,300
Three days ago I had my one-
month anniversary with hormones.

397
00:41:06,740 --> 00:41:10,540
When I came to Finland,
it helped me that I had people -

398
00:41:10,660 --> 00:41:13,180
with whom I could talk.
- It makes the difference.

399
00:41:15,220 --> 00:41:17,220
In Bournemouth I was all alone.

400
00:41:17,340 --> 00:41:19,220
Yeah, and even if
you're not alone, -

401
00:41:19,300 --> 00:41:21,740
physically you're still alone.

402
00:41:22,260 --> 00:41:25,500
And when I came here,
I had you.

403
00:41:26,100 --> 00:41:32,380
And when I needed some space,
I could go someplace else.

404
00:41:33,100 --> 00:41:37,060
But I was afraid I would run
into someone from my family, -

405
00:41:37,220 --> 00:41:39,860
my mother, my sisters...

406
00:41:40,420 --> 00:41:45,540
I remember, you were
a bit... withdrawn.

407
00:41:49,060 --> 00:41:53,180
Your spirits were quite low.

408
00:41:54,260 --> 00:41:59,220
But I can see the difference now
and I'm so proud of you now.

409
00:42:01,020 --> 00:42:03,260
And it makes me happy.

410
00:42:11,020 --> 00:42:14,340
You're so tall.
- I have to crouch...

411
00:42:46,740 --> 00:42:49,540
This place has been
a life saver for me.

412
00:42:54,180 --> 00:42:58,540
When I had
self-destructive thoughts -

413
00:42:59,140 --> 00:43:01,340
I would come here.
This place comforted me.

414
00:43:18,700 --> 00:43:21,180
Until now, a trend in my life
has been that -

415
00:43:21,300 --> 00:43:23,540
things begin fairly well.

416
00:43:23,660 --> 00:43:27,740
I have friends who are with me
and who love me.

417
00:43:28,100 --> 00:43:32,220
But after a while,
I somehow end up all alone.

418
00:43:58,380 --> 00:44:04,820
I push people away because
I don't want them to leave me.

419
00:44:05,820 --> 00:44:08,860
I prefer to keep others
at a distance.

420
00:44:09,540 --> 00:44:12,180
To keep me from getting hurt.

421
00:44:22,940 --> 00:44:26,220
My father said that
he wants to meet me.

422
00:44:28,540 --> 00:44:30,460
I'll go see him today.

423
00:44:44,580 --> 00:44:47,260
He'll probably expect
a different kind of shirt.

424
00:44:47,380 --> 00:44:50,060
Because he told me to
put on a button shirt.

425
00:44:50,224 --> 00:44:53,424
These are the only type
of shirts that I have.

426
00:44:53,820 --> 00:44:55,540
He said don't wear a dress.

427
00:44:55,700 --> 00:44:57,443
And I said of
course, no problem,

428
00:44:57,468 --> 00:44:59,004
I'm sure leggings will be ok?

429
00:44:59,028 --> 00:45:00,028
Yeah of course.

430
00:45:03,403 --> 00:45:04,980
Honey, we gotta start somewhere.

431
00:45:05,005 --> 00:45:07,027
We got to start somewhere.

432
00:45:08,620 --> 00:45:11,100
As he said yesterday -

433
00:45:11,220 --> 00:45:14,260
sometimes you just have to force
yourself into situations -

434
00:45:14,380 --> 00:45:16,100
and start talking.

435
00:45:16,540 --> 00:45:18,580
This is not too over the top.

436
00:45:18,620 --> 00:45:19,620
Fabulous glam.

437
00:45:21,100 --> 00:45:23,060
This is a humble outfit.

438
00:45:25,860 --> 00:45:28,100
We'll see
how this is going to turn out.

439
00:45:28,260 --> 00:45:31,260
I'll see my siblings again.
With them everything is fine.

440
00:45:31,460 --> 00:45:36,020
But when it comes to my dad,
I think he just needs time.

441
00:45:36,460 --> 00:45:40,940
He needs to accept all this.

442
00:45:44,100 --> 00:45:46,300
He needs to face the truth.

443
00:45:48,060 --> 00:45:50,540
Everyone is suffering
and missing each other.

444
00:45:50,660 --> 00:45:55,940
Anyway, I don't want to
get my hopes up too much.

445
00:45:59,780 --> 00:46:01,700
I'll just be disappointed.

446
00:46:36,580 --> 00:46:40,500
When my dad finally arrived,
we looked each other in the eye.

447
00:46:41,860 --> 00:46:42,946
There was a mutual
understanding,

448
00:46:42,971 --> 00:46:45,124
like 'it's been a while'...

449
00:46:47,300 --> 00:46:50,660
I had make-up and
I was wearing the clothes.

450
00:46:50,900 --> 00:46:54,460
He noticed them.
But he didn't say anything.

451
00:46:58,420 --> 00:47:00,260
Then we had lunch.

452
00:47:03,740 --> 00:47:05,860
And even if it was
only a chicken burger, -

453
00:47:06,060 --> 00:47:07,780
the fact that he paid for it -

454
00:47:07,980 --> 00:47:10,580
it felt like he was
welcoming me back.

455
00:47:20,423 --> 00:47:21,423
Yeah, Kelet.

456
00:47:21,940 --> 00:47:25,100
You look so happy!
- Do I?

457
00:47:25,460 --> 00:47:28,020
It went well.
He just called me two hours ago.

458
00:47:28,220 --> 00:47:29,820
He said to me...

459
00:47:30,020 --> 00:47:33,820
He said he wishes me
a safe trip back.

460
00:47:33,940 --> 00:47:36,340
I hope everything goes well.

461
00:47:37,780 --> 00:47:39,660
Imagine...

462
00:47:39,780 --> 00:47:46,260
As I've said before, he just
has to get used to the idea -

463
00:47:46,500 --> 00:47:51,900
that you are what you are.

464
00:47:52,020 --> 00:47:56,100
It might take a year or two.

465
00:47:56,460 --> 00:48:00,260
With time he'll understand
that this is who you are.

466
00:48:01,820 --> 00:48:05,300
And the love will follow.

467
00:48:06,140 --> 00:48:09,620
I'm happy for you.
You went and met your parents.

468
00:48:09,820 --> 00:48:12,380
I haven't even seen my parents
in a long time.

469
00:48:12,540 --> 00:48:14,700
I'm so happy that you met them!

470
00:48:17,300 --> 00:48:20,300
You went to the same places
where you were hopeless before.

471
00:48:20,420 --> 00:48:23,420
Now you have some responses
and you can continue your life.

472
00:48:23,540 --> 00:48:25,500
Now the things are
falling into place.

473
00:48:25,620 --> 00:48:27,900
I think they're starting to
fall into place.

474
00:48:28,540 --> 00:48:32,740
Do you remember
when two years ago -

475
00:48:32,860 --> 00:48:35,100
you called me from Manchester -

476
00:48:35,860 --> 00:48:38,460
and you were crying.

477
00:48:39,020 --> 00:48:41,540
You were feeling desperate.

478
00:48:41,700 --> 00:48:44,300
You said, 'Lola,
I don't know what to do.'

479
00:48:44,420 --> 00:48:50,620
'I'm in a bad place.
I'm homeless.'

480
00:48:51,060 --> 00:48:54,500
'How did my life
turn out to be like this?'

481
00:48:54,568 --> 00:48:57,368
Two different girls,
two different girls.

482
00:48:57,580 --> 00:49:00,540
I have to admit,
two days without you was fine, -

483
00:49:00,820 --> 00:49:02,980
but now I really
need you, bitch.

484
00:49:03,100 --> 00:49:06,180
Me too,
I've been like -

485
00:49:06,380 --> 00:49:08,340
where's Lola?

486
00:49:08,353 --> 00:49:09,553
I need that bitch.

487
00:49:11,009 --> 00:49:12,336
I need her.

488
00:49:12,540 --> 00:49:14,524
You've become
my baby little girl,

489
00:49:14,549 --> 00:49:15,791
I love...
- Oh my god.

490
00:49:16,151 --> 00:49:18,460
Well sometimes we need
a break but sometimes,

491
00:49:18,485 --> 00:49:19,503
some days I feel like...

492
00:49:19,860 --> 00:49:22,660
Sometimes we need some distance.

493
00:49:23,100 --> 00:49:25,460
But I think
we've been sewn together.

494
00:49:25,660 --> 00:49:28,700
Two weeks without you
is too long!

495
00:49:28,940 --> 00:49:31,420
But don't forget us
when you are rich.

496
00:49:31,780 --> 00:49:33,900
Like you'd leave me alone!

497
00:49:33,946 --> 00:49:36,766
- Girl...
- Okay, I love you so much.

498
00:49:36,821 --> 00:49:37,821
I love you too.

499
00:49:57,220 --> 00:50:00,340
This is really happening.

500
00:50:02,140 --> 00:50:06,540
I got my first gig as a runway
model at Helsinki Fashion Week.

501
00:50:18,300 --> 00:50:21,420
Kelet? Are you Kelet?
Sorry for my Finnish.

502
00:50:23,300 --> 00:50:25,740
How are you today?
I'm really good, thank you.

503
00:50:26,740 --> 00:50:29,060
So, if you could
try on your first look.

504
00:50:29,180 --> 00:50:31,340
Your first look is
basically just a dress.

505
00:50:33,300 --> 00:50:36,020
So this is
a little bit see-through, -

506
00:50:36,140 --> 00:50:38,540
are you ok to show
your nipples? - No.

507
00:50:39,420 --> 00:50:44,300
Otherwise, do you
have underwear?

508
00:50:46,300 --> 00:50:49,300
Yeah, is that ok?
- Yeah that's fine!

509
00:50:57,060 --> 00:50:58,060
Don't do this.

510
00:51:12,940 --> 00:51:16,580
May I ask, what is that?
I've never used anything red.

511
00:51:17,420 --> 00:51:21,700
It's just a blusher.
It brightens up your face.

512
00:51:21,940 --> 00:51:28,100
It gives some colour and
adds a bit of dimension.

513
00:52:02,140 --> 00:52:08,420
Autumn brought me
a longing heart, -

514
00:52:11,020 --> 00:52:17,060
a wonderful feeling of joy.

515
00:52:19,300 --> 00:52:26,300
My girl, I gave you
the most beautiful roses -

516
00:52:27,300 --> 00:52:33,140
as a memory of our love.

517
00:52:36,300 --> 00:52:39,300
But I didn't know that
even the flowers of love -

518
00:52:40,300 --> 00:52:43,300
disappear underneath the ice -

519
00:52:44,300 --> 00:52:47,300
when autumn freezes the ground.

520
00:52:48,300 --> 00:52:51,300
I can only watch in tears.

521
00:53:18,380 --> 00:53:20,220
I'm so nervous.

522
00:53:22,740 --> 00:53:25,980
We've spread
the information around.

523
00:53:28,260 --> 00:53:32,420
We told it to the
best gossipers in town.

524
00:53:33,260 --> 00:53:35,060
Kelet, that's mine!

525
00:53:35,740 --> 00:53:37,660
You already have too much.

526
00:53:39,020 --> 00:53:40,860
Okay. See you soon.

527
00:53:41,580 --> 00:53:43,380
I have to sort these out.

528
00:53:48,340 --> 00:53:50,340
This is starting to look OK.

529
00:54:12,497 --> 00:54:14,977
I love you, I love you,
I love you.

530
00:54:14,997 --> 00:54:16,864
- I love you.
- I love you.

531
00:54:17,300 --> 00:54:19,481
- Alright.
- Let's do it.

532
00:54:20,817 --> 00:54:25,942
They are like the fiercest,
the sexiest, the coolest...

533
00:54:26,067 --> 00:54:28,307
House of Miss Rocky...

534
00:55:14,894 --> 00:55:17,113
I am the face queen
of Finland, honey.

535
00:55:29,651 --> 00:55:31,408
Hey beautiful.

536
00:55:54,380 --> 00:55:57,700
My chosen family makes
my world feel different, -

537
00:55:57,820 --> 00:56:01,340
like my voice matters.

538
00:56:38,740 --> 00:56:40,620
Be whatever you
want to be, honey.

539
00:56:52,082 --> 00:56:53,910
Shade is training bitch.

540
00:57:28,673 --> 00:57:31,339
I am the face queen
of Finland, honey.