Now taking applications for new soulmate

I will divorce my longstanding soulmate Floorks due to inactivity, once the interviews are over.

Criteria:
1.) Must be handsome/pretty. I don't care if you're girl or boy, i would prefer a boy, but hey, beggars can't be choosers, as the olde saying goes.
2.) Must not be age-racist. I know I am 35, which may be old for here, but in the real world, this is young. Hell even 50 is young by today's standards. I am still a millennial, if you're born between 80-2000 you're considered millennial.
3.) Must be nice.
4.) Must be able to handle sarcasm and/or criticism without assuming I am targeting and bullying you. Yes there's a difference between, "that outfit makes you look ugly" and "you make that outfit look ugly".
5.) Would prefer you're 18+ for the sake of jokes and convos, however, I realize this game's demographic is mostly people under 18, so that's fine, but don't expect any perverse conversations or anything about my personal life as a gay man, like asking if I am a "top or bottom", because that is something I would prefer not to discuss with minors.
6.) Prefer people who don't use profanity a lot. I understand sometimes in the moment like "what the f" or whatever, but when every other word is a curse word, it just makes you looks stupid, and desperate, or angry. People don't talk that way in the real world, so why should you?
7.) Must not be obese. Overweight is ok, but obese like shay aka liar is not.
8.) Must not have eyes too far apart. In other words, if you look like sleep aka cherrymilk, I won't be able to bear myself and lower my standards to talk to you. People with eyes so far apart from each other are considered aliens to me and tent to look like goldfish, deer, or any other animal with one eye on each side of their face.
9.) Must not be a liar.. aka Drastic. Drastic does tell the truth sometimes, usually when she is defending herself, but in general makes up b/s topics just for attention. I don't wanna be around people like that. I have a real life, real things happen in my life, not fabricated stories brainstormed in my composition book at school.
10.) Must not be poor. Like Milou. Milou lives in a trailer and sells furry suits she makes out of dead birds she finds around her property, that probably die due to the stench of her trailer. Not only is it bad to be poor, it's bad to kill BIRDS, because this ruins the animal kingdom. Now as for being poor, I can understand if you're in college, you're struggling for financial assistance (even tho I worked 2 jobs and went to school in college and never complained).

Application:
1.) State your name (first name is fine), I like to call my soulmate by their real name, but if you are uncomfortable doing so because you think that someone can find you using your first name only; well then you are delusional for one, but secondly I will respect your wishes.
2.) State your age. This is a must, I need to know how old you are for sake of future convos. Please don't like about your age.
3.) Sex, if you're a male/female. Don't say you're genderless. I realize it's trendy and cool now, but don't do that, because very few people are actually born genderless, and it's not funny to make a mockery of those people.
4.) How many hours a day you spend on TFM? For me, I work 9-5 days, except Tues and Thurs, I work from home. I tend to spend more time online on Tue/Thurs and weekends.
5.) Which cafers/TFM users (in general) that you hate. This helps me narrow down applicants, to try and choose those with similar enemies.

Trolls will be ignored on this topic, only serious inquiries will be read. Keep your soulmate option open and clear, so wehn I divorce Floorks, I can ask for your paw in proverbial marriage.

Thank you all for reading!