Poker? She's my Sister!

Poker? She’s my Sister!

You look at your hand, glaring at your pair of twos. You lower your hand to take a look at your opponents. Your first sister, an angel, looks to be rather upset. You guess that your little sister must have a pretty bad hand. Your youngest sister however is smiling like a devil, which makes sense since she is a devil. She quickly realizes that she’s smiling and quickly tries to imitate your expressionless scowl, but can’t seem to stop smirking. You glance back to your twos.

“I bet five hundred,” the devil says as she tosses a couple poker chips from her rather impressive pile.
Your angel sister frowns. “Then I guess I’ll fold. What about you, brother?”
You pretend to contemplate, but you’ve already decided what you were going to do. “I’ll raise you another five,” you say as you add the last of your chips to the betting pool.

“You must be pretty confident bro. It’s good to know that you can take a little risk, unlike Angela.”

“Shut up Beatrix! Folding is a legitimate strategy when you’re hand isn’t any good!” You sigh as Angela rises to Beatrix’s obvious bait, but you guess old habits die hard.

“Whatever. Alright bro, let’s see what you’ve got!” You reveal your pair, which loses to her full house. “Yes! I win again! And it looks like you ran out of chips too! You know what that means?”

“Yeah, yeah. So, what do you want me to do this time?”

“Let’s see…” Beatrix ponders her options for a moment before blushing a little bit. “I-I know! A k-k-k-k-kiss!”

“Absolutely not!” Both you and Beatrix turn to look at Angela, who’s now sporting a deep blush herself. “I call shenanigans!” Beatrix glares at Angela, her tail swishing about in frustration.

“What’s got your panties in a twist…”

“You cheated!”

“Geez, some angel you are. You lose a little bit and then you start accusing other people of cheating!”

“I don’t see how you can’t be cheating!” Angela’s wings begin to beat as her frustration grows. “Every single one of your hands is amazing! The worst hand I’ve ever seen you have is a flush! Shenanigans!”

“You’re just jealous that I’m better at playing cards that you are! You tell her bro!” She crosses her arms before turning to you. Angela also turns her attention to attention to you. You start to sweat a little bit from the sudden attention.

“Of course she hasn’t been cheating,” you respond while putting on your best poker face. Angela furrows her brow, not liking your response.

“How can you say that? She almost always wins! How can she do that without cheating?”

“It’s easy. You just suck!” Angela shoots a glare at Beatrix, who returns it with a smug smile.

“I do not suck, you immoral devil!”

“Weeell, I don’t cheat! You goody two shoes angle!”

“HARLOT!”

“PRUDE!” Both of your sisters rise from their seats, ready to start fighting. Your cool demeanor starts to crack.

“Wait!” You flinch slightly as they turn their gaze to you. “She didn’t cheat, because I’ve been letting her win.” The expression on both of their faces go from angry to confused, which would have been cute if you weren’t worried about how they were going react to your confession.

“Bro?”

“What do you mean?”

You take a breath before explaining. “It all started when we started playing games together. We all had fun for the most part, but since Beatrix didn’t know how to play most of the time she’d lose. When that happened, she’d throw a tantrum and wreck stuff with her magic. One day, she set my Grimagia cards on fire. That was then that I realized that I needed to do something. I knew you wouldn’t agree to let her win all the time Angela, so I started to cheat so that she couldn’t lose. I’d stack decks, fudge scores, used loaded dice, anything that I could do to keep her from losing.”

“You’re lying!” Both you and Angela look over to Beatrix. “I know your lying bro! There’s no way you’ve been letting me win this whole time! There’s no way you could have done it!”
You shrug before saying, “I’ve gotten really good at cheating. I’m probably a pro at it by now.”

“Brother, I don’t think you should sound so proud about being a good cheater.” Beatrix bristles at Angela’s comment.

“So you’re just going to believe him?”

“It makes sense Beatrix, and considering the evidence at hand I doubt we can come to any other conclusion.”

“Grrr I’ll show you! One more game!”

“If we must,” Angela says with a sigh. You nod your head in agreement before trying to gather up the cards. “I’m sorry brother, but if we want to do this properly you can’t be the dealer. You can’t be trusted for now.” You sigh before letting her gather up the cards and start shuffling the deck.

“I know, let’s try something a little different this time?”

“Sure, what do you have in mind?” you ask, not sure if you like that mischievous grin on your devil sister’s face.

“Let’s make it a game of strip poker!”

“No.”

“Absolutely not!” Beatrix gets an annoyed look on her face before taking Angela off to the side. You can’t quite make out what they’re talking about, but you think you heard something about seeing some dangly bits. When they finish their little discussion Angela states, “I have changed my mind. Let’s play strip poker.”

“Majority rules! Let’s play!” You give Beatrix a dirty look.

“I thought you were a self-described anarchist?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’ve always supported the noble virtues of democracy.” You roll your eyes, knowing that she’ll support anything to get what she wants. “So Angela, what should we do for the rules?”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, you’re an angel right? You guys are good at coming up with rules.”

“Hmph, whatever. We’ll each start with 4000 points worth of chips. Each 1000 worth of chips will correspond to one article of clothing. When you lose 1000 worth of chips you will one article of clothing, starting with the shirt, followed by pants, bras then panties. Brother, you will have to wear a hat, since you don’t wear a bra. Beatrix and I will take turns being the dealer. Sounds fair?” You nod in agreement.

“Sounds good to me! Let’s play!”

*Some time later*

It looks like this is going to be the last round. Your face turns an even darker shade of red as you examine your sisters. Angela has been stripped to her frilly white bra and panties. She notices you staring at her and tries to hide her blushing face behind her cards. Breatrix on the other hand seems to be more irritated than angry, even though she’s down to her purple thong underwear. Frowning, you look back at your cards. You look back to Angela and mutter, “Hit me.” Angela passes you a card, which you stare at with an air of indifference before adding it to your hand and removing another.

“I need a card too Angie.” Angela hands Beatrix a card. After seeing her card, Beatrix’s face regains its usual confident smile. You guess she must have something good. “Hehe I bet my last 500!”

“My my, aren’t we confident? Think you can turn it around?” taunts Angela.

“Of course I can stupid angel! So what are you going to do?”

“Hmm. I think I have to fold.”

“Again? Geez you suck!” Beatrix chuckles as Angela shoots her a glare. “So what are you going to do bro?” You study your sister’s smug face before adding your chips to the pile. “Hehe I don’t know how you managed to strip me down so much bro, but this is where I turn the tables! Prepare yourself!” She throws down her cards, revealing her three eights. Not a bad hand, but not as good as your straight.

“Sorry, but I win again,” you say as you merge your winnings into your larger pile.

“Again? I never realized that you were so good at cards brother. How’d you get so good?”
You smile as you say, “Why so surprised? I play a lot with my friends at school, so I guess it just prac…tise…” Beatrix looks absolutely furious. “H-hey Brea, y-you were doing pretty good all things considered! Better luck next time?”

“ANARCHY!!!!!!” Beatrix throws her arms into the air and the table you were all playing on bursts into flames.

“My poker set!” you exclaim as you back away from the combusting piece of furniture.

“My clothes!” shouts Angela as she mimics your actions as quickly as angelically possible.

“Stupid game! Stupid Brother! I’ll get you for this!” screams Beatrix as she runs out of the room.

“… I’m in trouble aren’t I…”

“Do you even have to ask brother? I suggest you lock your bedroom door for a while…”
The End