I’m just following up from Nike & Joel, what he says is true to some extent. Natarsha, you have surrounded yourself with people that only benefit from one side of the relationship (you), most of these people happen to be males who naturally pursue females and most of them lonely, inexperienced with girls & spend a lot of time secluded from any proper social interaction or it’s minimal and here you present a platform and opportunity for them to connect with a decent looking, female who's somewhat competent at video games and into the same stuff as them, this whole online friendship thing is complete bullshit for the most part I can assure you 90% of these guys are playing the position you let them until (if ever) they get the chance at you, and 9/10 guys would take it, because there's nothing else for them, the gamer girlfriend dream coming true for them, unfortunately that's just how it is, and you have made choices that have lead to this, you left school and cut off that real life network, didn't pursue studies so you limited that one, when you socialise its with the same people who you play games with, you see you have limited your horizons significantly, you chose to stream instead and females streamers have a bitter sweet deal in the "scene" and I will explain why that is, firstly for some reason people still believe girls playing games is some sort of rare occurrence and 9/10 guys are just hormone fuelled animals  let alone lonely degenerate gaming freaks who are heavily introverted and socially inept to some extent, so the second a female boots up a stream they flock to it, if you show a bit of cleavage here gain more followers, post a gym pic there same thing, you girls know what you're doing, and they love it, it's how marketing it works and there is nothing wrong with it in my opinion because it’s just a tactic, so you amass this huge following of what 20,000 people? How many of them do you think follow you bc ur entertaining or talented at the game in all reality, probably less than 50 individuals, sounds sad but it's true, this is not a personal attack this applies to 90% of the female streaming scene, you see insanely talented male players or extremely entertaining ones struggle to get 500 followers 50 consistent viewers and yet they are ticking all the boxes, so you can't blame anyone for the spot you're at, you and your "friends" are just a product of your environment. Pick anyone of your close friends or people you play with  Dani, strauchanie, dylan, joel?, They will all play the role you give them, the innocent friend, the guy your just pugging with etc whatever it is, and that's just bc u only allow them that much leeway, given the opportunity they would leap at the chance to get with you i know that for a fact, bc they are that demographic i mentioned before (to different extents), and that's not against them it's just how it is, I think you really try and please everyone with this half assed e-girl streamer personality that probably isn’t even really you, it’s just what you’ve been moulded by this lifestyle you’ve restricted yourself too, you’re 18 go do whatever you want, make friends, enjoy a proper social life, play games to enjoy them not to amass a following or please your “subs” like holy fuck man it just seems like you’re in shambles and everyone just pretends they're the caring e-guy friend but holy fuck they just wish you sent the late night dm one day proving them wrong, this is by NO MEANS a personal attack Nat, I’m just being completely honest I’m an experience customer and I think you have grown a lot but still have a long way to come yet, really by confining yourself to other people's expectations and boundaries, social norms you will never be happy, so I’m sure you will find a way but it's totally up to you.
Kind Regards
Don Cheese
CEO Cheese. LTD