In good time the sorrows that pained me during the latter half of the school day caught up with me and the possibility taking refuge in my pastimes was as distant as the hills and the mountains the window in my room looked out to. Both my physical and mental conditions began to deteriorate through a paralyzing guilt that kept me pinned down on the bed. The brain replayed time and time again the moment in which my dreams shattered and vanished and the body acted accordingly, holding itself firmly to the bedsheets and spelling out the appropriate replies to refute the depreciating remarks that were being spewed against me. I spoke to the best of my eloquence, but the dim lit ceiling didn't answer, and if my ears made out some answer it was a sign that my mind was losing it.
       Once the sunlight no longer filtered through the glass window, torbid darkness crept over my room. I couldn't summon the will to press the light switch, sit up or even eat because the time and place I was stuck in none of these things were required.
       My eyes grew accustomed to the dark, but they still didn't look at the present under any circumstances. Driving back my classmates' spiteful remarks was well within my control, nevertheless shaking off the look of disappointment that condemned me at my short interrogation was quite the other way around.
       The self-imposed torture lasted so long all the way until nine, my stomach pleaded me to feed myself on something beyond empty and tasteless air.
I munched tepidly on the ready-made dinner to savor the forkfuls, and 	was gradually revived by the meaty taste of the burger.
The radio and the laptop were off, because not even the best notes from the most devoted composer could fill the void better than the good old silence.
Then it came to my mind that it wasn’t like me to set a high bar on people, and in a remote era I would have chosen the way of the monks and shut myself out from the world, if only it wasn’t strewn with doubts and questions and the idea of clinging to an unbending deity didn’t lose its point   in the present age. Yet through my  wasted youth I had matured a liking for make-believe, and crept out of my hole only when I had it with my pestering mind. Chilly winter nights were the fittest parts of the days to leisurely stroll around the town, and a life-saving alternative in these rough times when you couldn’t dream of catching a wink. So I buttoned up my heavy coat and overcoat and set off on my journey to the end of the dormant city. The district shimmered with the lights of the high poles, spreading its luminous warmth on the rotten head of mine. As usual, cats were the only dwellers of the city, and unlike humans they’d let you be as long as you didn’t provoke them.
The night was in full bloom, and the absence of wind made it all the more relaxing. Beyond the streets with scores of closed shops a gas station below a mounted ceiling with glowing lights cropped up. I couldn't have paced all the way up to a gas station in the middle of nowhere with my means, but the blinding lights drew me to it like a stray fly, although it didn't suit the overall scenery. Curiosity goaded me on, and I wearily closed the distance between me and the uncanny station. A burning sensation seeped in my eyes and made it seem like something wasn’t sitting well with me, I was shocked to find out that the shining ceiling was floating in the sky unsupported by any kind of columns or pillars or whichever structure would have kept the ceiling from tumbling to the ground. But no, the ceiling just stood there without the least consideration for the gravity laws, and the notion that the real me had fallen asleep instead of going out suddenly crossed my mind. To perceive that I was dreaming was an uncommon occurrence, in fact I was positive that this was the first time I succeeded in getting the upper hand over my mind. Unreasonably enough, as the distance narrowed, the hue of the shining lights whizzed to the other way of the spectrum, shifting from a flaming yellow to a freezing blue at each step. It took me a great deal of time to come close to the station, and the second I stood beneath the flat ceiling, the lights settled into a suffusing but accommodating blue color. Below the coolness of the spotlights, a surging wave of resentment creeped over me, now nauseating me and now stabbing my mind. Countless fragments of visions depicting unattainable dreams fluttered about in the air, weaving around me and drifting swiftly past my shoulders as if to underline the fugacious nature of my delusions. Questioning my sanity became imperative, and I wished to clear out as soon as possible, but something held me firmly to the ground and numbed my limbs. An unknown force kept me rooted to the gray floor, and my head would inevitably face ahead and shift back to its original position whenever I tried to turn it away.
The unsettling show terminated with a sudden brownout, opening my eyes to a blurry reality.
Several buildings stood at the other end of the street and on my left side, and the weird gas station wasn’t anywhere to be seen, leading me to conclude that I had fallen into the grasp of insomnia.
“Looks like tonight’s not my night.” I said muttered to myself and immediately retraced my steps while my vision came back by degrees.
Far away in the distance a carefree humming frightened me and became more clear and audible as time went by. But what panicked me the most was that it wasn’t the way home I was taking, for my sense of direction was twice as skewed and took me who knows where. The humming was now closer than ever, almost within a hair’s breadth, and its source turned up soon after under the shade of an umbrella.
“Sorry to disturb your night stroll, may I ask you the way to --------?” My question startled them.
“Yeah, it’s a couple of blocks away.” They turned around to look at me.
In that moment, my mind flashed back to a sunny day a few months back, slightly before the winter break.
Her dark eye blotted out by the side swept hair, coupled with her soft and snowy complexion which glimmered under the pale moonlight gave it away as she folded the umbrella and revealed her face to me.
“Come to think of it, I might have already met you somewhere around the town.” She said and showed me soft cheek dimples which outlined her amusement at the recognition.
She was wearing a black overcoat, black hoses, black shoes, black leather gloves, black everything and was one with the night. Her umbrella was black, too.
“You saved me once, I hope you won’t mind giving it another go.”
“Not at all.” She unzipped her shoulder strap bag and shoved the umbrella inside, but it fell through it and dropped to the ground as if a large hole was carved into the leather.
“Do forgive my clumsiness.” She bent down to pick it up, but instead of grabbing an umbrella, her hands closed around a stick or something along the lines of it. In other words, for some illogical reason she held the skeleton of the umbrella, then stored it inside her bag and looked at me in astonishment.
“What’s with your eyes?” She asked raising her brows.
“You mean the dark circles? I’ve had them since I was fourteen.”
“There’s blood inside the white parts.” She turned the rear camera on and handed me her phone “Look, right on the side of your irises.”
The sight of my alarmingly bloodshot eyes made me flinch.
“Christ, I definitely need to catch some z’s.” I lumbered wearily up to her and tripped over, saving myself from a fatal accident just in time in exchange of some scratches on my hand.
“Seems like you can’t go on your own. Come, I’ll lead the way.” She kept an eye on me as she walked me back to my house. At her offer to help me to stand up and walk I refused and crawled to my feet, then began to follow her.
“By the way, why are you carrying around an umbrella? The weather isn’t all that disagreeable, miss...” I closed the distance between me and her.
“Call me Cran, like cranberry.” The buttons on her overcoat gleamed in the dark as the street lights we passed irradiated her clothes and outlined the makeup on her eyelashes.
“That’s an unusual name, never heard of it.”
“It’s easy to memorize.” She flashed a quick, out of place smile.
Our conversation came to an abrupt end as I heaved my head up to gaze at the clear sky. On the opposite side from where I looked, a ferocious thunderbolt clapped and for a split second, shiny white light spread all over the road.
“Speak of the devil.” She said and started to fumble in her bag to draw the old umbrella out.
An unrelenting rain followed and threw the clear skies into turmoil, but something perplexed me still. I walked up under Cran’s umbrella which went back to its original shape and provided enough cover for the two of us. From the shelter of the umbrella, I could see the extraordinary phenomenon taking place through my eyes: numerous varieties of blue flat shapes tumbled earthwards and took me by surprise. They bore a resemblance to pieces of hail, but on a closer inspection turned out to have long, sharp edges on each side, leaving me under the impression that stepping out to catch some of them would unavoidably put my life in peril.
“It’s taking a dire turn, eh?”
She gave me a sidelong glance in response as we walked along, then resumed the earlier discussion.
“I looked up the forecast beforehand, but if you really want to know the real reason why I never leave my umbrella home... well, the answer is just over your head.”
Her unclear statement puzzled me, but soon after slightly racking my head I worked it out.
“What’s the moon got to do with your particular habit?”
“Oh, the moon is so much more than you believe. For instance, it can mess with your mood and your sleep schedule.”
“And how is bringing an umbrella going to block the effects?”
“You don’t have to deal with them if you don’t stand under the moonlight.”
“I still don’t get it.”
“That’s just how it works, you have my word.” Cran shrugged with a deadpan expression.
“I’ll take your word for granted then.” I never really bothered to find out more on lunar cycles, but as long as she wasn’t going to harm me, I could’ve handle the scientific notions she pulled out of her ass just fine.
We were caught in a downpour of crystal shards, the unbroken patter of the sharp splinters, scattering all over the street and hitting the umbrella in a hard and continuous rhythm doubled, then all of a sudden slowed down to an halt.
"The weather is just like an infant throwing a tantrum, you ought to deal with his momentary fits." Cran remarked and held her hand out in the rain. Small knife-edged splinters dropped down into her hand, but they didn't pierce or hurt her as I believed they would.
"Must've had one hell of a fit to hurl those glass shards against us and all that jazz."
"That's a little too much of a tantrum. It's just a seasonal hailstorm." She threw me a confused glance and I looked the ground over.
The tiny glass shards on the street glistened feebly, then turned trasparent and slowly melted down until they were no longer noticeable. You could easily see through them when they lost their shade.
"Well... let's say I was gifted with a vivid imagination." I mumbled and scratched my head.
"At any rate, we're almost there." She took a left "I suggest you to sleep all day through and restore your energies. Going on a late night walk without getting your share of sleep will burn you out."
"But I only hang around at night when I can't sleep."
"This might be the last time you'll meet me then, because I'm not fond of daywalking."
"I'll pass on the royal baton to you. You can have this dump of a city all for yourself."
We crossed a side street and came out on the road two blocks away from my house. The shops and bars were quiet, and the cats sitting over the walls of the driveways backed away. I heard that stupid dog from the early morning growling farther up the sidewalk.
"Don't step any further, or she'll bark at you next." I said without facing Cran, then turned to meet her eyes. Down the path opposite path, an enormous moon sulked from the horizon and I fixed my eyes on it.
"What's the matter?"
"It's nothing, my house is straight ahead and I don't want to trouble you any longer."
"Well then, I'll be on my way."
"I owe you two lives." I said as she turned her back to me.
"Glad to be helpful, see you later." She stepped down the road and on watching her walking off, a sudden thought struck my mind.
"Hold on, I forgot to introduce myself." I called her out and tried to keep my voice low in the wake of the sleeping neighborhood.
She turned her head to me and sniggered. "What's the point? You aren't seeing around me anymore. At the end of the day, a name is only a label."
"I catch your drift, but it wasn't fair on my part. The name's Allison."
"I'll bear that in mind. Sweet dreams, Allison." She smiled and sauntered down the damp street. The  oversized moon grumpily stared at me behind her shoulder. Once in a while I stopped in the middle of the road to turn around and contemplate the creases and the black streaks that completed its picture. To make things more hilarious, the giant blinked and curled its lips as I looked intently at it.
“After all the shit I went through, I’m not even shocked about this.” I thought upon walking to my house. Curiosity compelled me to peer over the wall of my neighbors, where that little prick of a dog was hunkered on the staircase steps and followed me with her eyes in a half-nervous, half-drowsy state.
“Not today, bitch.” I repeated in my mind and calmly squeezed into the gate.
When I was back home, I kicked my shoes off, hastened to my room, looked through my window, gave the grumpy moon the middle finger and closed the curtains. On that night, all the built-up stress was released in a voracious slumber.