Dildos for All

"Bill, Library card application, Library card application, Ooh, 50% off a 12 pack of quills with the purchase of a sofa!"
>Setting the coupon aside, you continue your meticulous sorting of your mail.
>Humming to yourself, you set them into their own groups, until you come across the last in the stack, a rather plain looking pamphlet.
"What's this?" You ask nopony in particular, floating it up in your magic.
>'Lonely? Look inside' is written on the cover, strange in its own right.
>Who's ever lonely in Equestria.
>About to throw it out, curiosity gets the better of you.
>After all, this could be a changeling trick, looking for ponies to steal away.
>Unfolding the pamphlet, you can't help but let out an unmarely blush.
>That's a lot of dicks.
>A lot of strange dicks.
>Quickly folding it back up, it gets stored away in your mane so Spike won't accidentally find it.
>Gotta save that for later.
>"Hey, Twilight, you're looking a little red, are you feeling sick?" your number one assistant asks, walking in with a tray of breakfast and tea.
"M-maybe, I'm feeling a little flushed right now, but I don't think it's anything major." you reply quickly, "I probably just need to get a little more rest."
>"Well then I'll haddle opening up the library today, you grab a nap after you finish breakfast," Spike says while setting the tray down.
>With a nod and a wave, you get started eating, your mind still stuck on the images from the pamphlet.
>There was at least one Stallion dick in there, you saw, but most of them were strange, alien even.
>Good schlicking material, hopefully.
>You haven't had a really good once since you retired "101 Harem Colts".
>A thick and now heavily worn tome filled with more colts than Ponyville.
>And you can still remember them all, from the dainty Feather Lace, to the heavyset and girthy Callery Pear.
>Your nethers quiver at the memory of when you used magic to try and replicate his... maleness.
>The spell collapsed quickly, but so did you.
>In the best kind of way.
>Rushing to finish your breakfast, you grab the mail you need to handle and hurry to your room.
>Once inside, it's a trifling matter to set up your "Keep Spike Innocent" spell array.
>The room, now soundproof, entry proof and peek proof, you can get into the 'meat' of your curiosity.
>Your mane releases your prize, your magic floating it over in front of you.
>It's dull, almost ignorable outside hides the beauties within.
>Gingerly taking the front sheet in your magic, you unfold it slowly, like slipping a ball bra off a colt as he makes soft, lewd noises.
>As the first fold comes open, you can see them, thick, meaty stallion dicks.
>Also, a strange, bumpy, spike shaped one.
>And below each dick, prices.
>This throws you for an immediate loop.
>Is this a prostitute advertisement?
>What kind of dick is that third one even?
>Curiosity overtaking arousal for a moment, you fully open the pamphlet, taking a brief moment to admire the different dicks on display.
>Right in the middle you find an explanation to all this.
>'Looking for a "companion" for the lonely nights? Our lineup of realistic model dicks are safe to use, hardy, and built to please. For more information and models, or to get an order form, simply send a letter to Dicks R Us, using the following information.'
>The listed address strikes you as odd, since it's not a house or business.
>Rather, it seems to be a temporary mailbox, for ponies working away from home for a season or two.
"Curious..."
>But you can deal with that later.
>For now, admiring these fine pieces of dick.

~~~One damned good Schlicking session later~~~

>Stretching out on your bed, you feel awake, energized and ready to take on the day.
>About to stow the pamphlet away for future sessions, you pause and consider.
>It did say there were more models available, maybe you should send in for more information.
>And an order form wouldn't hurt, just in case.
>The prices might be a bit high, but then, you've never heard of this company, so they're probably new.
>They're probably testing the waters with this product of theirs.
>Drafting up a professional, but friendly letter, you seal it up and put on the address.
>As you enter the main hall of the Library, Spike immediately rushes over to meet you.
>"Are you feeling better Twi? You're looking a lot better," he asks, standing at attention.
"I feel much better, I think that time to relax was exactly what I needed."
>"That's good," he says, relaxing a little, "Everything has been running fine so far, though there's only been one pony through so far."
"About that, I'll have a few new library cards that need to be mailed, once I fill them out, so if you could get ready to head out to the post office."
>"Can do," he says with a salute before starting to walk away.
>He doesn't get far before he pauses, looking back at you, "When I go, could I stop at SugarCube Corner to pick up a snack? They have these new donuts out, and I want to get one early."
"Alright, but don't get sidetracked. I don't want anything happening to you."
>"I'm not a little kid anymore," he retorts, his cheeks puffing up in indignation.
"I know you're not, and that's why I'm more worried. You're growing into a fine young drake, and I'm worried you might get drawn into something bad you never noticed when you were younger."
>"Alright, alright," he says with a small sigh while scratching his head, "I'll be careful."
>Shooing him off to go get ready, you pull out the materials to fill out the library cards.
>A little later, and you're seeing Spike off, cards and letter in his shoulder bag.
>Now, all you have to do is wait.
~~~
>Staring at the sealed envelope, your hoof rapidly taps against your cloud floor.
>It's just for fun, it's not like you need it or anything.
"After all, I'm Rainbow Dash, THE best flyer in Equestria, I have colts lining up at my door for a turn at my TPP."
>Sticking out your chest, you smile and feel some bravado return.
"Yeah, this is just for fun, something you can leave around to make the colts feel like they're bigger and better."
>Grabbing your order, you head for the door, slowing to a stop as you reach it.
"Come on Rainbow, just one step and you're outside. You're just taking a letter to the post, there's nothing weird about it."
>Shoving the door open, you barge out into the sunlight, standing proud with your mane and tail waving in the wind.
>Now you just have to fly down to the Post Office, and put this in the slot.
>Just like colts with their dicks and your slots.
>You're about to take off, when a thought hits you.
"Todays such a nice day, there's no reason to rush," you say to nobody in particular as you gather some cloud.
"I'll just drift over and enjoy the sun. Yeah."
>Once you have a big enough blob, you hop on top, using your wings to get it started.
>Sinking in more and more, you're soon covered by cloud, with only a small hole to peek out of.
>Not that you're hiding, it's just you did such a good job building this up, you want others to be able to admire it from all sides.
>Now where's that post office?
~~~30 minutes later~~~
"Why do all the roofs have to look the same here?" you curse to yourself silently, finally having found the post office.
>Ironically, it was almost right under where your house had drifted to recently.
>You could have dropped this envelope off in a dash and been done with it.
>Popping from your resting place, and totally not hiding place, you shoot down to the ground, landing in a flurry of wing flaps and wind, bringing yourself to a stop in an instant.
>Your steps are measured and calm, trotting up to the mail slot on the front of the building, and after sliding the letter in, you take off up to your house, a brief rainbow trail left behind you.
>Now it's just a matter of time.
>Maybe you'll go on a no schlick till it arrives, you've heard it makes the first few back amazing.
"Can I really deprive the Stallions of Ponyville my TPP though..."
"Well, I'll give it a shot and see how it goes."
~~~
>Tidying up breakfast, you eagerly wait for the mail.
>After your pamphlets went out, you got a very high rate of requests for info or order sheets, which means your business might go well.
>Of course, the real test will be how many order forms you get back over the next few weeks.
>Some will probably bite right away, jumping at the chance to have their own dick to use.
>Others will have to talk themselves into it.
>Some might not have the spare to buy one yet, even if they wanted.
>Heck, it took you weeks to nut up enough to buy your first cheap one, back on Earth.
>And now that you're in a land of magic ponies where the men are womanly, and the women, manly.
>Took a lot of work to find the right stuff and make the first moulds, but here you are, starting your business.
>The name might not be creative, but the reactions from everyone who you had to talk to while making it.
>Absolutely priceless.
>Even better when they saw the sample products you brought.
>Admittedly, you shouldn't have brought out the XL flared model first, but watching them eye the floppy dick wiggling around in your hands.
>You'll have to take Caramel out for a fancy day at the spa or something for modeling.
>He did wonders maintaining an erection so you could sketch it out.
>No homo.
>He was weirded out at first, but once you explained your idea, he was skeptical, but understanding.
>Something to help keep needier mares occupied would help colts not have to worry about being harassed as much.
>So occupied with your own thoughts, you almost don't notice the mailpony walking up your path.
>It might be a bit of a runaround, but you got a temp box, and have stuff being delivered from the box to your house.
>Just so you're not giving out your address before you have a proper store.
>What you don't expect is the mailmare pulling out two massive bundles of letters and setting them on your porch, just before you open the door.
"Thank you," you say as you wave to them, picking up your mail.
>"You're welcome, mister Popular," she says, waving back before taking off for the next house.
>Part of you wonders if she ordered anything, but most of you is too interested in getting the mail in to look through to care.
>Closing the door with a foot, you hurry into your spare room turned office and set the stacks down.
>After cutting the binding on the first bundle, you hold up the first letter, cracking it open carefully.
>In it, a filled out order form, along with a cheque for the total on the form.
>Returning the contents to the envelope, you check the next one.
>Same thing.
>The more you check, the more dicks you have to make.
>A few are ponies looking for order forms or info booklets, which you're already running low on.
>Dear sweet lord of Dongs, you're not prepared for this.
>Time to kick up production and send off what stock you have already.
>Thankfully most orders were vanilla, looking for black or flesh or mottled basic horse dick.
>Still, this is far beyond what you imagined.
>You'll probably have to send letters to some of the bigger orders and let them know there will be a delay due to the excess of orders.
>Which in the end is even more work for you.
>With a deep breath, you crack your knuckles and get to work.
~~~
>Walking in the door with your co-worker, the clerk looks at you and lets out a sigh of relief.
>"Thank you for coming in, Derpy, I know it's one of your days off, but we got so many packages in, there's no way we'd be able to handle it without the full crew on board."
"It's no problem, since it sounds like you have the problem here."
>The three of you go into the back, and you let out a not very quiet gasp.
"Sweet Muffin above that's a lot of boxes."
>"And they're destined for places all over Ponyville. If they were all for one or two places, we could just use the carts, but..."
"Have you found the outliers yet? The ones that don't fit any routes?"
>"We've got a couple. You can start with the big one there. It's the largest, and the one going the furthest out, unfortunately."
>Saluting, you pull on your mailmare cap, and flap over to the box, getting a grip on it.
>It's not that heavy thankfully, but it still fills your hooves.
>And it's address, Fluttershy's cottage, out on the border of the forest.
>The flight feels longer than expected, but then, you've never had to fly a box this big before.
>Swooping in low, you drop it right on her doorstep, before looping back for a landing.
>Ringing the doorbell, you wait for the pony herself to show.
>"Hello?" A soft voice asks through the door, "Who is it?"
"Mailmare, we have a package for you."
>The door swings open, revealing the yellow and pink Pegasus, "It's here, oh good!"
>Holding out the form for her, she signs it and you give a salute before taking off back to the Post Office.
>There's a long day ahead.
~~~
>The lights are low as you finish up closing the boutique for the day.
>The front door is locked, and you're running through ideas for dinner.
>It's just you in the house today, so the sky's the limit.
>Licking your lips at the thought of getting to open your imported Neightalian pasta sauce you've been saving, you're startled by a sudden clatter behind you.
>Spinning to look, one of the saddles on your ponequinns has slipped off and is lying on the base.
"I thought I checked all the clips," you mutter to yourself, walking over and floating it back into place.
>Kneeling down to see, you re-fasten the buckle with your magic.
>Everything back in place, you turn to head back to the kitchen, not noticing two vivid green eyes glinting briefly in the dark.
>Digging through your cupboards for your pot and saucepan, your flank waves side to side.
>A shiver runs down your spine as you feel a piercing gaze locked on your lady bits, but as you stand and look around, there's nopony to be found.
>Shaking your head clear, you set water on to boil while fetching the pasta.
>There's a sound of splashing as you pull out your noodles, but when you check, the water isn't boiling yet.
>Checking the sink, it seems the tap was dripping a bit, helping ease your swiftly growing nerves.
>Something about tonight has you on edge, and you don't know what.
>The water eventually starts boiling, and you pour in the pasta and get your sauce in it's own pan to start warming.
>Watching the noodles cook while slowly stirring the sauce, you get to thinking.
>It's so quiet and lonely here without Sweetie Belle, you really need a male companion.
>Somepony to cook for you, to keep you warm at night, and to fill you up.
>If they want to, that is.
>You'd never force a stallion to have sex with you.
>With the pasta almost ready, you pull out and pour yourself a glass of red wine and start some toast, perfect companions for fancy pasta.
>The rich, thick smell of the sauce wafting around the room as you strain the pasta melds with the bitter, fruity lingering taste of the wine in your mouth.
>A delicious preview of the meal to come.
>Butterfly pasta fills your plate, before being coated in the rich, savoury Neightalian sauce.
>Your toast is done up with butter and hints of garlic, and with everything ready, you sit yourself down.
>Napkin around your neck, you bring up your first forkful of pasta.
>The noodles are perfectly soft yet springy, and oddly slightly sweet.
>Probably just because of the wine, you reason to yourself, savouring another bite.
>The sauce is rich and flavourful, and with a bite of toast, a perfect blend.
>You can feel the warmth in your belly, soothing, especially in the late evening like this.
>As you eat, you feel the warmth spreading, both up your chest and down.
>Halfway through the meal, your marehood feels flushed, and only a few bites more and it's winking on its own.
>Your cheeks are flushed as well, and not from the wine.
>You've barely touched the glass.
>Rising from your seat, you shed the napkin and quickly head to the bathroom, your body leaving a trail of droplets behind you.
>The lights turn on, and you go to the sink, running cool water to splash on your face.
>Leaning in, you make extra sure not to mess up your mane as you try to cool down.
>You just keep getting warmer, however, and brushing the water from your face, you look up.
>Reflected in the mirror is a pair of green eyes shining behind you, and before you can make a noise, they pounce.
>Before you can let out a scream, a towel is forced into your mouth as a gag, and they push your body to the ground.
>As you struggle against your captor, something presses against your rear end.
>Something thick and firm.
>Clenching up, you do everything you can to resist, but the creature's phallus presses it's tip against you, before forcing itself in.
>It's conical tip lets it ignore your resistance while it's cone in cone form make it impossible to squeeze out.
>And it's girth...
>If you weren't so aroused already, it would be splitting you apart, but all your lust addled mind can make out is a deep, filling sensation.
>You only get to enjoy this a brief moment before it's forelimbs pin yours to the ground, rubbing your face on the tile floor as it pulls out.
>It's rear legs shuffle, clicking against the ground before you feel that pointed tip probing into your ponut.
>You can barely make a gasp before it plunges right in, forcing itself as far as it can go.
>A choked sob escapes you as your poor rear end is stretched by this monstrous cock.
>It gives you no room to breathe, however, as it pulls back and slams in again and again, the deeply ridged surface tormenting your poor ponut.
>The creature is relentless in it's pounding, it's body slamming against your perfect ass, leaving it stinging more and more.
>Ass being ravaged and body pinned, you can only gag and cry as you are used like a... a cum dump for this creature.
>Time drags on, and the stinging fades to numbness before you feel the creature tense up before ramming deep as it can.
>Thick, slimy liquid pours into your used and abused back door from the creature's monstrous dong before it pulls out and rubs it's filthy length across your flank to clean itself.
>It releases you, letting you slump to the floor finally, a greenish fluid leaking from your ponut and down across your still sensitive cunt.
>Rolling onto your back, you look over at your poseable jointed Ponequinn, standing there with its new large "Cragadile" model dildo with built in cum tube.
>Pricey, but dear Celestia was it worth it.
"I really must thank Zecora for that aphrodisiac, it certainly works wonders," you say to yourself, a hoof wandering down to gently brush your clit.
>Holding back a moan, you look over to where your other new toy rests, "The Deep Sea Terror".
"Well, I may be drained, but my body is certainly ready for another round. Hopefully my magic can hold up."
>Floating the tentacle-like toy over, you let it gently caress up the length of your pussy, making your entire body clench up and shudder in pleasure.
"Perhaps I used a little too much aphrodisiac in the pasta..."
"Ah well, a lady has her needs."
>The tip slides in, and your body is suddenly overtaken by the orgasm it had been desperately been trying to reach this whole time.
"Yes... a great many needs..."
~~~