Ponybones

Catastrophic Expectations

Oct 14th, 2015
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  1. ~Catastrophic Expectations~
  2.  
  3. Prompt: "Anonymous, darling...umm...there's this Jazz club in town that just opened up...and I figured it would be a lovely place to go, but I don't want to go alone...would you...join me? We can have dinner beforehand and then we can go dancing...waltzes, swing, and of course, the obligatory slow songs...well? What do you say?"
  4.  
  5. "Who put you up to this?"
  6. >You are Anonymous.
  7. >You are literally nobody in Canterlot High.
  8. >Rarity, the most elegant, classiest girl in school just propositioned you to a night of dinner and dancing.
  9. >Yeahnope.jpg
  10. >Has to be a trick.
  11. "Was it Rainbow Dash? Is this one of her stupid dares?"
  12. >You raise an eyebrow, awaiting a response.
  13.  
  14. "E-excuse me?"
  15. >Rarity looks taken aback.
  16. "You heard me. There's no way a beautiful girl just walks up and asks me to join her for a night on the town out of the blue."
  17. >You slam your locker shut and sling your backpack over your shoulder.
  18. "So what is it? A bet to see if you'll actually do it? Maybe this is a 'My Fair Lady' situation? 'Oh, that Anonymous, he's so aloof and socially awkward. I bet I could make him look nice and presentable by the next school dance!'"
  19. >You turn and head to class.
  20. "Well you can forget it. I'm nobody's science project."
  21. >Yeah, that showed her.
  22. >Now nobody will ever ask you out for the rest of high school.
  23. >Good work.
  24. >Fuck
  25. >Whatever, too late now. Roll with it.
  26. >You start to walk away when you hear a small voice.
  27. >Rarity's small voice.
  28. "You... you think I'm beautiful?"
  29.  
  30. >You turn around and Rarity looks stunned.
  31. >You raise an eyebrow.
  32. "It's not what I think, it's the truth. Look at you. Perfect hair, gorgeous eyes, an amazing smile. You could ask out any guy in this school and they'd say yes in a heartbeat."
  33. >Rarity blushes, a small smile forming on her lips.
  34. >Mygodthatscute.gif
  35. "Why, thank you for those kind words, Anonymous. Although, I wasn't aware you'd transferred to Crystal Prep."
  36. >What are you on about?
  37. "What are you on about?"
  38. >She smirks.
  39. "Well, you said I'm pretty enough to get any boy in this school to go out with me. You do still attend this school, don't you?"
  40. >She fluttered her eyelashes.
  41. >She smiled.
  42. >This was a goddamn trap.
  43.  
  44. "Uh. Well, of course I still go here."
  45. >Rarity smiles and steps closer, blushing as she makes doe eyes at you.
  46. "Perfect."
  47. >You feel your face flush
  48. "So you'll accompany me to the jazz club? And dinner?"
  49. >More eyelash batting.
  50. >Don't fall for it, Anon
  51. >Listen to Admiral Ackbar
  52. "Uh. Tonight?"
  53. >Don't fucking do it, Anonymous.
  54. "Of course, darling. No time like the present, I always say!"
  55. >She twirls the end of her hair around her finger.
  56. "Unless you had plans, of course."
  57. >You. Plans.
  58. "No, I had nothing going on."
  59. >"Dammit Anonymous! Get out of there!"
  60. >Your internal Admiral Ackbar is screaming about something.
  61. >Can't be too important.
  62. >God damn it, she's cute.
  63. "Excellent. Pick me up at my place, around six?"
  64. >She smiles and blinks innocently.
  65. >Ackbar cuts off transmission in disgust.
  66. "O-of course. I'll be there."
  67. >Your palms are perspiring
  68. >You're weak in the knees
  69. >Mother's pasta drips from your pocket.
  70. >Rarity grins and blows you a kiss before scampering off to her next class.
  71. >You head the opposite direction.
  72. >This can only end in tears.
  73.  
  74. >What's her game?
  75. >What horrors could possibly await you at that new jazz club?
  76. "What is the square root of n in this equation? Anonymous?"
  77. >You snap back to reality.
  78. >Whoops, there goes gravity.
  79. >Math class
  80. >EzPz
  81. >Except your brain was too busy trying to untangle the spiderweb you've willingly flown into.
  82. "Um. Three?"
  83. >The teacher narrows their eyes at you.
  84. >You got lucky, punk.
  85. "That's correct. Now..."
  86. >Charlie Brown adult noises.
  87. >Back to figuring out-
  88. "Wow Anonymous, you sure are good with those fancy mathematics."
  89. >Turn to see the source of the whisper.
  90. >That farm girl, Applejack.
  91. "Thanks."
  92. >Wait a second.
  93. >Isn't she...
  94. "So, I heard y'all were taking Rarity out for a night on tha town."
  95. >Dammit, she is friends with Rarity.
  96. >She must be part of this.
  97. "Maybe. So what if I am?"
  98. >Yeah, that's right.
  99. >Play it cool.
  100. >You're taking Rarity for a night on the town.
  101. >No big dea- wait a minute.
  102. >Holy shit.
  103. >You're taking Rarity for a night on the town!
  104. "Well. Ah just wanted ta let you know ah hope y'all have fun tonight. She's been eyeing that place for a while now, and I'd hate fer her to have a disappointin' evening."
  105. >She narrowed her eyes slightly.
  106. >Was... was that a threat?
  107. >Admiral? Come in Admiral!
  108. >No response.
  109. >You're flying solo, kid.
  110. "Uh. Yeah. I'll do my best?"
  111. >What does she even want to hear from you at this point?
  112. >Who starts a whispered conversation in math class to make vague threats?
  113. >Is the Apple family some sort of crime syndicate?
  114. >Are you going to find yourself beneath Sweet Apple Acres if you fuck up on this date?
  115. >Is this even a date?
  116. >What the fuck kind of name is "Applejack Apple" anyway?
  117. [RIIIIIIIIIIING]
  118. >Phew.
  119. >https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2K4iTh1TL9g
  120.  
  121.  
  122. >Hustle out of math class.
  123. >Head towards your locker to drop off your textbooks.
  124. >No homework tonight.
  125. >Can't use that lame excuse to get out of this situation.
  126. >Not that you want to.
  127. >It's just a trap, is all.
  128. >A trick.
  129. >A ruse.
  130. >You'll show up at Rarity's and her friends will pelt you with water balloons. [spoiler]Filled with cat pee.[/spoiler]
  131. >Or you'll make it to the jazz club and she'll make a spectacle of "breaking up" with you on the dance floor. [spoiler]Or screaming rape.[/spoiler]
  132. >Or you'll just have a wonderful time until you fuck up and do something stupid. [spoiler]Like try to hold her hand.[/spoiler]
  133. >You shake the thoughts from your mind as you notice an envelope taped to your locker.
  134. >Curious.
  135. >You open it up and read the letter inside:
  136.  
  137. Darling Anonymous,
  138. In my haste to get to class on time I completely forgot to give you my address! I've left it here, with my phone number so you can reach me.
  139.  
  140. I'm really looking forward to tonight. I can hardly wait to hit the dance floor with you. <3
  141.  
  142. [Personal information numbers]
  143.  
  144. ~Rarity
  145.  
  146. >...
  147. >She gave you her number.
  148. >...
  149. >She drew goddamn hearts on her note.
  150. >...
  151. >It smells like her perfume.
  152.  
  153. >Lasciate ogne speranza, voi ch'intrate
  154.  
  155. >You are a lamb eager to be slaughtered.
  156. >You are willingly putting your leg in a bear trap.
  157. >You are allowing yourself to become the punchline of what can only be a cruel joke.
  158. >You no longer care.
  159. >You can't care.
  160. >The most beautiful creature you've ever laid eyes on gave you a crudely drawn visual representation of a vital organ on a scented slice of a dead tree.
  161. >You're grinning like a doofus and can't stop. [spoiler]Won't stop.[/spoiler]
  162. >It doesn't matter what happens.
  163. >Today was a good day.
  164.  
  165. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RV5jJrv2kjY
  166.  
  167. >Walk home.
  168. >Toss bag on the floor of your room.
  169. >Check the time.
  170. >Time enough to clean yourself up.
  171. >Time enough to cancel.
  172. >This has to be some cruel prank.
  173. >Look at note one more time.
  174. >Hearts.
  175. >Darling Anonymous.
  176. >Still smells like her.
  177. >Walking barefoot into Hell it is.
  178.  
  179. >Be outside Rarity's house
  180. >5:55
  181. >Couldn't even wait for your inevitable humiliation.
  182. >Showed up early.
  183. >Whatever.
  184. >You ring the bell.
  185. >A sudden symphony of crashes and a shriek.
  186. >A moment of silence, then a familiar voice.
  187. "Comiiing!"
  188. >Rarity opens the door.
  189. >Out of breath.
  190. >Her hair's a mess.
  191. >She's holding a fat white cat under one arm.
  192. "A-Anonymous! W-why hello. You're here early!"
  193.  
  194. "Uh. Yeah. Sorry about that. I can go kill five minutes if that's a problem..."
  195. "NO!"
  196. >She nearly drops her cat, looking panicked.
  197. "I mean, it's not a problem at all! Just..."
  198. >She looks behind herself and bites her lower lip.
  199. "Just come inside I suppose. Do try to forgive the mess."
  200. >You step inside.
  201. >Holy Granola, Batman
  202. >Her house is a disaster zone
  203. >Lamp knocked over
  204. >Fabric everywhere
  205. >What happened here?
  206. "What happened here?"
  207. >Rarity pouts and shuts the front door.
  208. "This little lady happened. I don't know what's gotten into her lately but she flew around the house like a whiling dervish the minute you rang the doorbell. Something's had her spooked all week."
  209. >Probably skeletons.
  210. >This house is probably filled to the brim with spooky scary skeletons.
  211. >Rarity's former suitors.
  212. >You're going to wake up dead beneath her floorboards.
  213. "Ha. Cats."
  214. >Smooth.
  215. >Rarity smiles and brushes her hair from her face, quickly collecting it back into its signature curl.
  216. >Her cat jumps down and nuzzles your leg affectionately.
  217. >You're probably being marked for death.
  218. "Well, it seems that Opal likes you."
  219. >You kneel down to pet the furry creature.
  220. >It slashes your hand.
  221. >Claws dig in
  222. >Wraps around your hand and bites
  223. >Admiral Ackbar is disappointed.
  224. >You scream and fling the hellbeast away.
  225. >It slams a wall and lands on its feet, scurrying up the stairs out of view.
  226. "Opal!"
  227. >Rarity shouts in futile frustration at the fleeing little monster.
  228. "Oh, darling, are you alright? Opal can be a handful but I've never seen her do anything like that before!"
  229. >Rarity reaches for your wrist.
  230. >She gingerly turns your hand over, inspecting the wounds.
  231. "I have just the thing for this in the first aid kit in my sewing room. Wait right here."
  232. >She scampers up the staircase.
  233. >You're bleeding.
  234. >Your hand hurts like hell.
  235. >But you're still smiling like an idiot.
  236. >Rarity just [spoiler]held your hand.[/spoiler]
  237.  
  238. >You cradle your hand to try and keep from bleeding on Rarity's carpet.
  239. >Well. Any more than you already have.
  240. >Cat did a number on you.
  241. >Rarity descends her staircase
  242. >Lifegiving bandages in hand
  243. >Like a Valkyrie, heavensent to dress your wounds
  244. "Now, this will sting a bit but it's important to make sure the wounds don't get infected."
  245. >She cleans your scratches with disinfectant and wraps your hand in linen and gauze.
  246. "There. How does that feel?"
  247. >She's [spoiler]holding your hand[/spoiler] again.
  248. "Fantastic."
  249. >You catch her blush as she lets your hand go.
  250. >She looks away and bites her lip.
  251. "Things have been a disaster so far. I'd understand if you want to cancel our plans."
  252.  
  253. >This is your chance.
  254. >You can escape whatever twisted plot she and her friends have in store for you.
  255. "Don't be absurd. It's just a flesh wound."
  256. >Dammit Anonymous!
  257. >Relax Admiral, whatever horrible joke this is she clearly feels bad about the cat.
  258. >Can't possibly be any worse than that.
  259. "Really? You're still willing to go out with me after Opal maimed you?"
  260. >She looks nervous.
  261. "Pfft. 'Tis but a scratch!"
  262. >She smiles.
  263. "Well then. We should probably get going. The night's not getting any younger."
  264. >You look around.
  265. >Fallen coat rack, scattered fabrics, blood.
  266. >CrimeScene.jpg
  267. "Are you sure you don't want me to help you clean this place up a bit first?"
  268. >She looks around.
  269. "Oh I couldn't possibly ask that of you. I'll tidy up after we get back. I've already inconvenienced you enough, my cat scratching you like that after you so graciously agreed to accompany me tonight. Besides, I made dinner reservations for us, and we wouldn't want to be late for those."
  270. >You nod and cast one last look around the mess around the two of you before walking to the door and opening it for her.
  271.  
  272. >You step outside into the brisk evening air.
  273. "So where are we going for dinner?"
  274. >Reservations means it's somewhere fancy.
  275. >Fancy means expensive.
  276. "Oh, it's just a little vegetarian place I've been dying to try out."
  277. >Vegetarian. Great.
  278. >Paying to eat something pulled out of the ground.
  279. "Sounds great!"
  280.  
  281. >She leads you through a sketchy part of town.
  282. >Side street after back alley.
  283. >This is the scene of your grisly demise.
  284. >She seems unfazed.
  285. >Finally you reach a small diner with a tacky neon sign.
  286. >The Haymaker
  287. >You wonder if there's going to be a "How tough are ya?" welcoming committee.
  288. >How did Rarity even hear about this place?
  289. "How did you even hear about this place?"
  290. "A friend of mine waitresses here. Truth be told, I wasn't planning on coming here tonight but when she heard I had a date with you she absolutely insisted. She can be very assertive."
  291. >This is it.
  292. >Here's where the trap will spring.
  293. >here's where Rarity's Alpha female she-wolf friend will leap out and beat you to death with her fine toned Vegan weightlifter arms for daring to go out on a date with-
  294. >Holy shit
  295. >She called it a date.
  296. >You're on a date with Rarity.
  297. >RonPaul.gif
  298. "Anonymous? Darling? Are you alright?"
  299. >Huh?
  300. >Oh. Oh!
  301. "Oh! Sorry. I zoned out for a bit there."
  302. >She looks concerned.
  303. "Oh dear, it's not from blood loss is it? Are you feeling lightheaded? Do you need to sit down? We should go inside and get you something to eat regardless, you're probably famished, if not about to faint!"
  304. >She grabs your good hand and leads you towards the door.
  305. >[spoiler]Her fingers entwine with yours.[/spoiler]
  306. >[spoiler]You think you feel a squeeze.[/spoiler]
  307. >[spoiler]You squeeze back gently.[/spoiler]
  308.  
  309. >Walk inside
  310. >Straight up fifties style diner
  311. >Black and White checkerboard floor
  312. >Tasteful potted plants
  313. >No vegan werewolves
  314. >The Admiral Approves
  315. >The waitress approaches
  316. >Pink hair, yellow complexion
  317. >She's a [spoiler]qt. A QT![/spoiler]
  318. "H-Hello there. My n-name is F-Fluttershy. We-Welcome to the Haymaker, how tough are y- Oh. Oh, Rarity! This must be that Anonymous guy you were telling me about. You were right, he IS a [spoiler]cutie.[/spoiler]"
  319. >She grins at Rarity.
  320. >Rarity's head is a beet.
  321. >You think she's adorable.
  322. >She thinks you're [spoiler]cute.[/spoiler]
  323. >ThatOneSceneFromRudolph.mov
  324. >You feel your own cheeks heat up.
  325. >Fluttershy stifles a small laugh.
  326. "Alright, right this way to your reserved table."
  327. >She seats you.
  328. >Hands you each a menu.
  329. >Points out the complimentary carrot and celery stick platter.
  330. >Then smiles and [spoiler]fucks right off while you decide what to eat.[/spoiler]
  331. >You glance over at Rarity
  332. >Her blush has diminished a bit.
  333. >Her head is now a rosy pink instead of a full on red.
  334. >She seems focused on reading the menu.
  335. >You glance at yours.
  336. >It's surprisingly robust.
  337. >You were expecting Salad and Salad
  338. >You decide to try one of the specials
  339. >The "Nacho Daddy's Mac and Cheese"
  340. >You settle your mind and glance over the menu at rarity.
  341. >She's so damn pretty.
  342. >Glancing quickly becomes looking.
  343. >She looks up from her menu and catches your eyes.
  344. >Oh god.
  345. >Were you staring?
  346. >Does she think you're a creeper?
  347. >Are you a creeper?
  348. >Do you feel a sudden urge to hiss, play in lightning storms and ruin infrastructure via suicide bomb?
  349. >Allahu Ackbar?
  350. "Like something you see?"
  351. >Rarity's voice saves you from the unstoppable tide of Islam [spoiler]for now.[/spoiler]
  352. >Wait, what?
  353. >She realizes what she said.
  354. >Spasketti errywhere.
  355. "From the menu, I mean. Hahaha. Hrm."
  356. >She bites her lip and buries her face behind he menu.
  357.  
  358. >You get an idea.
  359. >Before you can think about it you're reaching over the table.
  360. >This is a bad idea.
  361. >You grab the top of her menu
  362. >This is such a stupid idea don't do this Anon.
  363. >You pull the menu down, revealing her face.
  364. >Nooooo! They're all gonna laugh at you!
  365. >You look into her eyes.
  366. "I do now."
  367. >You smirk.
  368. >OH GOD WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT.
  369. >She blushes and grins, looking down and away and back at you and away again.
  370. "Hah. Well. Hah. I don't think I qualify to be on the menu here. I'm not exactly vegetarian cuisine."
  371. "I'd eat out anywhere with you on the menu."
  372. >...
  373. >JESUS CHRIST, ANON
  374. >This is it.
  375. >You're going to get slapped and she's going to walk away.
  376. >Rejection
  377. >Shame
  378. >Dishonour
  379. >Sudoku
  380. >She's biting her bottom lip.
  381. "Perhaps we'll go somewhere more accommodating next time."
  382. >holy shit
  383. >You could cook an egg on your face right now.
  384. >Suddenly you feel the top of her foot lightly trail up the side of your leg.
  385. "*Ahem*"
  386. >You're so startled that your skeleton nearly escapes.
  387. >No freedom for you yet, Mr. Skelington. [spoiler]But soon.[spoiler]
  388. >Rarity is similarly spooked.
  389. "I was just wondering if you two were ready to order yet. Or I could leave you alone a while longer."
  390. >Fluttershy had the cruelest smirk on her face.
  391. >How long had she been standing there?
  392. >Watching.
  393. >Judging.
  394. "Ah, I'm ready to order if you are, darling."
  395. >She called you darling.
  396. >She calls everybody darling.
  397. >Shut up brain, let me have this.
  398. "Uh. Yeah, sure, I'll have the spaghett- uh. The Cheesy Mac Daddy Nachos. And a ginger ale, because that's what Batman drinks."
  399. >Smoove.
  400. >Oh fucking hell you said that last part out loud.
  401. >Fucking
  402. >Real fucking smooth, idiot.
  403. >Fluttershy jots down your order
  404. "One Nacho Daddy's Mac and Cheese, one ginger ale. And for the lady?"
  405. "I'll have the daily special."
  406. "Ah, the Prince of all salads. Excellent choice."
  407. >She retrieves your menus and leaves the two of you alone.
  408. >[spoiler]Rarity's foot finds its way back to your leg.[/spoiler]
  409.  
  410. "AYY VINNIE, WE NEED A VEGETA AND AN ABOMINATION."
  411. >You blink in confusion.
  412. >Was that Fluttershy?
  413. >Girl's got a pair of lungs on her.
  414. >A gruff response emanates from the back
  415. >Presumably the kitchen.
  416. "YOU GOT IT FLUTTERBUTT."
  417. >This place has ambiance.
  418. >You look back to Rarity.
  419. >She's blushing.
  420. >Suddenly you realize [spoiler]she's kicked off her shoe beneath the table.[/spoiler]
  421. >Her foot begins tracing up and down the inner side of your leg.
  422. "So darling, how are you enjoying the evening so far?"
  423. >She's smirking at you through her blush.
  424. >And half-lidded eyes.
  425. "Uh, I, uh. I-it's been great. It is great. It's, uh."
  426. >Her toes slide up and press against your thigh.
  427. >She slowly slides down in her chair, smirking at you.
  428. >She starts rubbing little circles with her foot, curling her toes against you.
  429. >You let out a gasp before you can stop yourself, then bite your lip.
  430. >She grins mischievously, sliding further down and sliding her foot further up your thigh.
  431. >Her toes press against the bulge in your crotch.
  432. >She draws circles there, too.
  433. >[spoiler]Fucking Diamonds.[/spoiler]
  434. "You seem excited. You must really be eager to hit the dance floor."
  435. >She grins wickedly as she drags her foot up and down across the front of your bulge, using her big toe almost like a thumb to grip you through your pants.
  436. >She lowers her voice to a whisper.
  437. "Or maybe you'd like to throw me onto this table, tear my dress off and take me right here, in front of my friend Fluttershy?"
  438. >You are gripping the table, biting your lip, doing everything in your power not to lean your head back and moan.
  439. >A small one escapes your throat anyway.
  440. >[spoiler]Rarity looks pleased with herself.[/spoiler]
  441.  
  442. >Her ministrations continue.
  443. "My my, Anonymous. What on earth could that have been?"
  444. >She's almost completely sunken into her chair.
  445. >The sole of her foot rubbing your hard-on through your pants.
  446. "Were you imagining it? My naked form writhing beneath you? Fluttershy not even three feet away from us, in that cute little waitress ensemble. I bet she likes to watch."
  447. "Like to watch what, Rare?"
  448. >Rarity shrieks, jumping up in her seat and nearly out of her skin.
  449. >The skeleton within you tries to make a break for it as well.
  450. >Not today, Mr. Bones. [spoiler]But soon.[/spoiler]
  451. >You both bang the underside of the table with your legs, causing it to jump with you.
  452. >The combined sudden movement causes Rarity's foot and your crotch to collide with an unfortunate amount of force.
  453. >You pitch forward onto the table, barking out in pain as your eyes well up
  454. >Rarity slinks her leg away as she sits up straight, looking entirely prim and proper except for the warm red glow that's taken over her entire upper body.
  455. >Fluttershy looks thoroughly confused, glancing back and forth between the two of you.
  456. "Um. Whatever. Here is your order. If you'd like anything else feel free to flag me down. I'll try to get to your table as soon as I can. Although,"
  457. >She stifles a giggle.
  458. "It might be a while."
  459. >She gestures around to the empty diner.
  460. >Funny joke.
  461. >You'd give her a smile if your dick wasn't in boiling agony.
  462. >Still laughing to herself, she starts walking away.
  463. "Enjoy the meal, you two lovebirds."
  464. >Slowly crawling back up into a sitting position you inspect your order.
  465. >The Nacho Daddy's Mac and Cheese
  466. >Nacho chips covered with elbow macaroni in a thick cheddar cheese sauce, topped with red peppers, jalapeno, habanero and shredded provolone cheese.
  467. >You pity the dead, who can no longer know such joys.
  468.  
  469. >You lift a nacho from the plate.
  470. >The toppings glisten in the dim light of the restaurant.
  471. >You take a bite.
  472. >Cheesy goodness, heat from the peppers.
  473. >Bueno.
  474. >You glance over at Rarity.
  475. >She's staring down at her salad.
  476. >Cheeks still on fire.
  477. >Face scrunched up.
  478. >She seems intent on murdering her food with her fork.
  479. >You clear your throat awkwardly.
  480. >She looks up at you.
  481. >Her expression is some combination of staring daggers and looking like she's about to cry.
  482. >She quickly looks down and goes back to stabbing her salad and eating the mangled chunks.
  483. >You frown, but you're not really sure how to respond.
  484. >Did you do something wrong?
  485. >Impossibru.
  486. >Still
  487. >You decide to let her cool off and eat your food in relative silence.
  488. >You can figure out what's wrong when your mouth isn't full of incredible taste sensation [spoiler]and she stops stabbing things like a crazy person.[/spoiler]
  489.  
  490. >You finish your nacho pasta after a few minutes.
  491. >Apparently Rarity was consuming her [spoiler]victim[/spoiler] as well.
  492. >She's sitting with her arms folded on the table looking out the window.
  493. >Her hair's blocking your view of her face.
  494. >You start to clear your throat to speak again.
  495. "How was the meal?"
  496. >Jesus Mary and Joseph
  497. >Where the hell did Fluttershy pop up from?
  498. >Your skeleton somehow remains on the inside. [spoiler]For now.[/spoiler]
  499. "Was everything alright? Did you two want any dessert?"
  500. >She grins. [spoiler]It squeaks.[/spoiler]
  501. >Rarity seems to snap back to reality. [spoiler]Whoops there goes gravity.[/spoiler]
  502. "Oh, no, thank you, darling. Everything was lovely, although we really should be off."
  503. >You nod.
  504. >Time to head to the jazz club and hit the dance floo-
  505. >Fuck.
  506. >Wait.
  507. >Oh Fuck.
  508. >[spoiler]You don't know to dance![/spoiler]
  509. >This is worse than a trap.
  510. >This night was foiled in its conception.
  511. >You're more Doomed than the state of Latveria.
  512. "Alright. I'll be right back with the bill."
  513. >Another grin as she leaves.
  514. >You look at Rarity.
  515. >She's looking at her hands in her lap.
  516. >[spoiler]Sadly.[/spoiler]
  517. >You open your mouth to say something
  518. >Fluttershy appears with the cheque and some after dinner mints.
  519. "Here you go. On behalf of the Haymaker, I hope you had a wonderful meal and go on to have a wonderful evening."
  520. >She makes a small bow and smiles again before walking away.
  521. >Odd.
  522. >She didn't take any money.
  523. >You flip the bill over.
  524. >Everything is zeroed out.
  525. >Wat.
  526. >There's a note scrawled on the bottom:
  527.  
  528. Compliments of the owner. You kids have a fun night! You make a cute couple.
  529.  
  530. >Everything's turning up Milhouse.
  531. >You show Rarity the note.
  532. >She pales and gets up and starts towards the door.
  533. >...
  534. >You blink.
  535. >...
  536. >You hop up and rush after her just as she heads outside.
  537.  
  538. >Step outside into the night.
  539. >Rarity is just...
  540. >Leaving?
  541. >What the heck?
  542. "Rarity, wait up!"
  543. >She doesn't slow down.
  544. >You speed up.
  545. >Jogging up next to her you can see [spoiler]she's crying.[/spoiler]
  546. "Rarity? What's the matter?"
  547. >You reach out to
  548. >Fuck I dunno. Touch her shoulder?
  549. >Something.
  550. >She clearly needs some sort of support.
  551. >She speeds up a little, avoiding your hand and eye contact.
  552. >You speed up too.
  553. "Rarity, where are you going? Can you please tell me what's going on?"
  554. >No reply.
  555. >Fuck this.
  556. >You sprint ahead of her, put yourself directly in her path and [spoiler]gently[/spoiler] grab her shoulders, forcing her to stop walking.
  557. "Rarity, tell me what's wrong."
  558. >She stops crying for a moment as she looks at you.
  559. >Those pretty blue eyes still full of tears.
  560. >Then her face crumples and she leans into you, crying into your shirt.
  561. >[INITIATE AWKWARD HUG PROTOCOL]
  562. >After a few sobs she manages to choke out a reply.
  563. "Oh, A-A-Anon, I just. I don't know what's wrong with me. I-I j-just... I like you a lot and wanted to make sure you had a wonderful evening, and now I've ruined it, because... because now... [spoiler]now you think I'm a slut.[/spoiler]
  564.  
  565. "Rarity..."
  566. >Rarity is standing in front of you.
  567. >Tears streaming down her face
  568. >Sniffling
  569. >Lip quivering
  570. >Muh [spoiler]hart.[/spoiler]
  571. >She wipes her eyes and turns away.
  572. "I... I'll understand if you just want to forego the rest of our evening and go home."
  573. >You grab her shoulders again.
  574. >You turn her to look at you.
  575. "Rarity. I can't dance. I don't like crowded spaces. I don't even listen to jazz. There are only two things I want to do right now more than I want to take you to that new jazz club. Number one on that list is [spoiler]somehow make you feel better.[/spoiler]"
  576. >She wipes her tears again, leaving ugly black streaks from her mascara across her cheeks.
  577. >You release her shoulders and gingerly trail your fingers down her arms, gently [spoiler]taking her hands in yours.[/spoiler]
  578. "I don't think you're a slut, Rarity. I think you're sophisticated and beautiful and [spoiler]way out of my league.[/spoiler]"
  579. >She smiles a little.
  580. "You... you don't think I was too... forward? In the diner?"
  581. "Pfft. That doesn't make you a slut. A bit of an exhibitionist, maybe, sure, but not a slut."
  582. >She looks down and steps a bit closer, leaning into you and [spoiler]entwining her fingers with yours.[/spoiler]
  583. >[spoiler]She squeezes your hands.
  584. >The wounded one hurts like a motherfucker.
  585. >Play through the pain, Anonymous.[/spoiler]
  586. "Thank you Anonymous. I guess I did overreact. I just... I had a plan for how I envisioned this evening going and so far it's all completely wrong. First Opal ruined the dress I was making to wear tonight, then she attacked your hand, then Fluttershy insisted we go to that dive of a salad bar instead of a romantic candlelit dinner..."
  587. >She rests her head on your chest.
  588. "I just wanted tonight to be special."
  589. >[spoiler]You slip your bandaged hand free of hers[/spoiler] and gently pet her head, letting your fingers trail through her hair.
  590. "Any night out with you is special."
  591. >She smiles up at you.
  592. >Mission accomplished.
  593.  
  594. >Rarity takes a few minutes with her pocket mirror and a wetnap to clean her streaked makeup.
  595. >You idly pop an after dinner mint into your mouth while you wait.
  596. >She shuts the flip mirror and returns it to her purse.
  597. >She walks up beside you and lightly touches her fingers to your wrist.
  598. >You extend your arm.
  599. >She wraps hers around it and rests her head on your shoulder.
  600. >The two of you start walking towards the new club.
  601. >It's a beautiful night.
  602. >Starry_Sky.bmp
  603. >Dim light from the street lamps.
  604. >Cool autumn breeze.
  605. >Rarity shivers slightly.
  606. >You bring her in closer and put your arm around her.
  607. >You smooth your palm down her forearm.
  608. >It's goose pimply.
  609. >You [spoiler]entwine your fingers with hers.[/spoiler]
  610. >She [spoiler]squeezes appreciatively.[/spoiler]
  611. >You walk together in silence.
  612.  
  613. >After a few minutes of walking the place comes into view.
  614. >A rather unassuming building, save the sign over the door.
  615. >A black cat with an impossibly wide grin that opened to form the club's door.
  616. >A small metal plaque was inlaid on the actual door within:
  617.  
  618. The Cat's Meow
  619.  
  620. >You notice a chalkboard sign off to the side:
  621.  
  622. The Cat's Meow
  623. Grand Opening!
  624.  
  625. >You raise an eyebrow and look around.
  626. >Hello darkness my old friend.
  627. >You look the other way.
  628. >The sound of silence.
  629. >You glance at Rarity.
  630. "You're sure this is the place?"
  631. >She nods.
  632. >You still feel uneasy about this.
  633. >You shrug and push the door open.
  634. >What could possibly go wrong?
  635.  
  636. >You step inside a brightly lit vestibule, its existence a stark contrast with the building's black exterior.
  637. >The three walls of the small space are covered in red curtains.
  638. >The ones in front of you are parted to reveal an open doorway leading to a dimly lit staircase.
  639. >Your stomach turns.
  640. >You don't hear any music.
  641. >This place looks sketchy as fuck.
  642. >In the seedy part of town
  643. >Who even listens to Jazz around here?
  644. >Rarity, apparently.
  645. >This is a front
  646. >Some kind of mob cover up
  647. >You'll go downstairs
  648. >See something you weren't supposed to
  649. >Bang Bang
  650. >Nice kids
  651. >Wrong place
  652. >Wrong time
  653. >Call it a tragedy and cut to the weather girl
  654. "Are you coming?"
  655. >Huh?
  656. >Rarity is looking at you from the first step.
  657. >Still [spoiler]holding your hand.[/spoiler]
  658. >She looks concerned.
  659. "Anonymous, darling, what's wrong? You look pale."
  660. >You shake the ridiculous thoughts from your head and try to smile reassuringly.
  661. "Sorry, I just spaced out for a moment there."
  662. >She frowns.
  663. "You've been doing that an awful lot this evening. Are you sure you're quite alright?"
  664. >You nod.
  665. >"Yeah. Sorry. My mind just wanders sometimes when I'm stressed."
  666. >Her frown deepens.
  667. "Stressed? Oh dear. Darling, if I'm being a burden, please just say so."
  668. >Her eyes lower to the floor.
  669. "You've made it obvious that coming to a place like this isn't your usual idea of a good time, and you've been so gracious and considerate of my feelings all night. I'd hate to think I'm making you miserable by bringing you here."
  670.  
  671. >You reach out and gently raise Rarity's chin.
  672. "I couldn't possibly be miserable while I'm with you."
  673. >That was cheesier than the macaroni nachos, Anon.
  674. >She smiles, her blush contrasting her beautiful blue eyes.
  675. >You step forward as she [spoiler]takes your hand in hers[/spoiler], allowing her to lead you down the stairs.
  676. >The sounds of trumpets, drums and bass strings begin to infiltrate your eardrums as you descend the long twisting staircase.
  677. >The stairs end abruptly, the narrow corridor fanning out into a spacious dance floor in front of a small raised stage housing a four man band.
  678. >The dance floor is far from capacity, but there's still more people here than you were expecting.
  679. >Mostly a slightly older crowd, not many close to your and rarity's age.
  680. >Was that vice-principal Luna?
  681. >Regardless, you're thankful it's not mind-numbingly full, but there's still enough of a crowd to be lost in.
  682. >You're not sure you could handle anyone actually watching the travesty that is your imminent attempt at dancing.
  683. >Suddenly the swinging jazz tunes die down to a quieter mellow groove as the trumpet player stops.
  684. >He gestures and shouts out towards the two of you still standing at the base of the staircase.
  685. "Welcome to the belly of the beast, young blood! There's not much room to shake it where you're standing, and it's a fire hazard to boot. C'mon, jump in! The water's fine!"
  686. >He gestures towards the dance floor as he replaces the trumpet to his lips and the music flares back up with newfound vim and vigor.
  687. >The entire club looked your way, for at least a moment.
  688. >The ones closest the staircase shifted to make room for the two of you and are still watching expectantly.
  689. >Rarity beams and moves towards the dance floor, pulling your [spoiler]hand[/spoiler] along with her.
  690. >[spoiler]You want to let her take it off and bleed out everywhere.[/spoiler]
  691. >[spoiler]It would be less embarrassing.[/spoiler]
  692.  
  693. >This is it, Anonymous.
  694. >This is where it all falls apart.
  695. >This is the moment the Admiral warned you about.
  696. >ButIDidn'tListen.jpeg
  697. >Now everything about this night
  698. >The cat scratch
  699. >The restaurant
  700. >The walk here [spoiler]holding hands.[/spoiler]
  701. >Worthless.
  702. >All because you don't have a goddamn clue how to dance.
  703. >What are you even supposed to do with yourself?
  704. >Everybody around you is staring.
  705. >You're a deer in the headlights.
  706. >Disaster is approaching at 55 miles per hour.
  707. >It blares its airhorn but you
  708. >You just freeze.
  709. >You have to run, but you can't.
  710. >It's getting closer.
  711. >Ready to splatter your guts all over the highway.
  712. >A rig that big, it could barely slow down at this distance, let alone stop.
  713. >This is how you finally die.
  714. >You shut your eyes and brace for impact.
  715. >[spoiler]*BUMP*[/spoiler]
  716. >Rarity hip bumps you.
  717. >You snap back to reality, [spoiler]whoops, there goes gravity[/spoiler].
  718. >You nearly keel over, completely caught off guard.
  719. >Rarity smiles and steps closer to you, pressing her body against your chest and [spoiler]entwining her fingers with yours.[/spoiler]
  720. >She looks at you through half lidded eyes and leans in to whisper hotly into your ear
  721. "Don't you dare even dream of coming this far and disappointing me now, Anonymous, or I'm calling off our second date."
  722.  
  723. >Oh God.
  724. >This can't be happening.
  725. >Your worst nightmares are all coming true.
  726. >Rarity's going to drop you like you're [spoiler]stolen goods.[/spoiler]
  727. >All because you can't dance.
  728. >The old saying is right
  729. >It don't mean a thing
  730. >If you ain't got that swing.
  731. >This is The. Worst. Possible. Thi-
  732.  
  733. >Wait a minute.
  734. >What'd she just say?
  735. >...Second date?
  736.  
  737. >PopeyeEatingSpinach.gif
  738. >CourageWolf.png
  739. >ShiaLaBeoufJustDoIt.mp4
  740.  
  741. >You will not go gently in to this good night.
  742. >You steel your resolve.
  743. >You screw up your courage.
  744. >You [spoiler]let the spaghetti fly.[/spoiler]
  745. >You extend your arms and step back, creating space between the two of you.
  746. >You slip one of your [spoiler]hands free from Rarity's[/spoiler] and twirl her around.
  747. >You release the other as she spins
  748. >From there you [spoiler]just sort of flail around in time with the music.[/spoiler]
  749. >[spoiler]You have no idea what you're doing.[/spoiler]
  750. >[spoiler]But you're determined to do it with confidence.[/spoiler]
  751. >Rarity is grinning at you.
  752. >You smirk.
  753. "Like my moves?"
  754. >She covers her mouth and laughs a little.
  755. "Oh Darling, they're [spoiler]absolutely terrible."[/spoiler]
  756.  
  757. >Your bravado immediately deflates.
  758. >You slump a little.
  759. "Heh. I told you I couldn't dance."
  760. >She smiles and slips her arms under yours, playfully swaying them with the music.
  761. "Nonsense, darling. You dance just fine. You won't be winning any choreography awards anytime soon, but at least you aren't [spoiler]an antisocial lump standing off in the corner." [/spoiler]
  762. >The band begins to slow its pace, transitioning to a smooth, slow piece.
  763. >Rarity moves her body closer to yours.
  764. >She looks up at you, blushing slightly.
  765. >You feel your cheeks heat up as you move your hands to rest on her [spoiler]hips.[/spoiler]
  766. >She starts to slowly turn the two of you, stepping in time with the music.
  767. >You follow her lead.
  768. >She rests her head against your chest.
  769. "Anonymous... You never did tell me the second thing."
  770. >You blink.
  771. "Huh?"
  772. >She looks up at you.
  773. "Earlier this evening, when I was upset. You said there were two things you wanted to do more than take me here. One was to make me feel better. You never said what the other one was."
  774. >You feel a lump in your throat.
  775. >You swallow awkwardly.
  776. "I can't tell you what the other one was, Rarity"
  777. >She raises an eyebrow and lifts her head to look up at you.
  778. "And why not?"
  779. "Because..."
  780. >You tense up.
  781. >You feel yourself start to panic.
  782. >You look into her eyes.
  783. >You steel your resolve.
  784. >You channel your inner [spoiler]Sebastian.[/spoiler]
  785. "It was this."
  786. >You lean in and [spoiler]softly kiss her lips.[/spoiler]
  787. >She [spoiler]starts for a moment, then kisses you back.[/spoiler]
  788.  
  789. >That wasn't nearly as bad as you were expecting.
  790.  
  791. FIN
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