The Universal Solvent

Mar 13th, 2017
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  1. >You couldn't be more excited right now.
  2. >As you look over everything, you have to hold back giddy laughter.
  3. >It's taken a while, but you've remained vigilant.
  4. >And tonight, it is all about to pay off.
  5. >The last step is merely moments away.
  6. >Literally the press of a button away.
  7. >One button to finally reach your goals.
  8. >To leave this world in lieu for one of your own choosing.
  9. >And, what's a better world than Equestria.
  10. >Sure, My Little Pony has a stigma about it, but you've always had a soft spot for the newest iteration.
  11. >And on top of that, the world just seems like a nice place to live in.
  12. >Rubbing your hands together, you can't help but take a moment to reflect on how you got here.
  13. >It all started with your undergrad work.
  14. >You had chosen the oh so popular field of Theoretical Physics.
  15. >You spent a good year or two as the only girl in a room full of well meaning but socially inept guys.
  16. >Oh man, was James ecstatic to finally lose his virginity.
  17. >Not that you're a bombshell or anything, but to him, you were a fucking goddess.
  18. >You, a nerdy physicist who's social life ends the moment you're offline.
  19. >Looking back, it was a pretty nice time.
  20. >But, if you had just ran along with your work there, you wouldn't be here right now, on the cusp of the greatest scientific breakthrough in history.
  21. >No, no, your work there was a springboard for your true goal.
  22. >You still remember that lecture on multiverse theory.
  23. >It was painfully brief and lacking in solid proof, but man did you eat it up.
  24. >The very concept was intoxicating to you, hell, it still is.
  25. >So, you focused on that alone.
  26. >The possibility of different universes outside of our own.
  27. >This meant you leaching a lot of the school's funding for as long as possible without drawing too much attention.
  28. >It was a lot of secretive work and late nights, but it did form the backbone of your theory.
  29. >Fiction is only fiction to other universes.
  30. >Even you know it sounds insane on paper, but the more you worked on it, the more it made sense.
  31. >A creator of, whether it be an artist, author, play write, or fanfiction enthusiast, creates a new universe with the forming of a fictional world.
  32. >This world, though designed completely out of creative means, becomes very real in it's own universe.
  33. >The more fleshed out the creative property, the larger the scope of the universe.
  34. >Our universe is something of the genesis of all other universes, the spawning grounds of all other realities.
  35. >That's cool and all, but you're ready for a change of pace.
  36. >Right now you're sitting on the cold floor of the warehouse you've been renting.
  37. >It's both your home, and your work space.
  38. >And, it shall be the last place on Earth you will ever see.
  39. >Your funding ran dry a lot quicker than you had hoped, leading you to MacGyver together more pieces of the technology than you would normally be comfortable with.
  40. >But, you aren't looking for consistency.
  41. >You only need it to work once.
  42. >You finish off your dinner, tossing the greasy paper the burger was in to the side haphazardly.
  43. >It's go time.
  44. >With a deep breath, and an adjusting of your glasses, you start inputting commands into your computer.
  45. >So far so good, no critical failures, no angry Vietnamese restaurant owners asking if you've been rerouting power again, just smooth sailing.
  46. >Once you've got everything set up, you get up, stretching as you look at the far corner of your warehouse.
  47. >Plastic explosive really is cheap on the bulk, a pleasant surprise when you were putting together your cover up.
  48. >If this all goes according to plan, you'll be gone from here in an instant, with all your stuff here and rent past due.
  49. >You can't let people find this tech.
  50. >As much as you hate to credit the influence of certain corners of the internet in your thought process; you can't let "fucking normies" get a hold of this stuff.
  51. >Yeah, you've spent too much time online recently.
  52. >Shitty memes aside, you've got some work to do.
  53. >Well, more like work to finish up.
  54. >You stroll over to your explosives, making sure the mechanisms are all ready to go when you make your exit.
  55. >Man, people are going to think you were some kind of terrorist when they find any remnants of this shit.
  56. >Oh well, sorry Mom!
  57. >Maybe once you would have been worried about being on some FBI watch list, but tonight, you couldn't care in the slightest.
  58. >You're not going to be here by the end of the night.
  59. >Speaking of, you check your stopwatch on your phone.
  60. >About two minutes left.
  61. >You move over towards the launch pad, looking it over.
  62. >Looks like a fucking mess, but it should work.
  63. >You hope so at least, this thing took a lot of fucking electrical tape to keep together after that first trial.
  64. >What's the worst that could happen if it fails?
  65. >You die, you die like a bitch.
  66. >In all honesty you could have probably ran the odds, but you also liked being able to sleep this past week.
  67. >So, you're going in blind!
  68. >But, you can probably guess the odds aren't good.
  69. >With roughly a minute left, you treat yourself to one last drink.
  70. >You have no clue if they'll have beer in Equestria, but you assume they probably do not.
  71. >So, you take one celebratory swig of the cheap shit you bought an hour ago.
  72. >In hindsight, you should have gotten something better with the fifteen bucks still in your pocket.
  73. >But what can you do?
  74. >Once you've finished your little drink, you quickly take off the clothes you hadn't taken off the moment you got back into the warehouse.
  75. >If David Cronenberg and Jeff Goldblum taught you anything, it's that foreign contaminates in shit like this don't end well.
  76. >Good thing you installed that fly zapper weeks ago!
  77. >With only moments left on the clock, you saunter over to the launchpad.
  78. >In the moment, you're more restless than scared.
  79. >You just want to know if this works or not dammit!
  80. >If you're going to die, then lets get it over with!
  81. >You admittedly lost track of the seconds as the light turns green.
  82. A: "Oh sh-"
  83. >Your remark is cut off instantly by the launchpad erupting in light, removing you completely from this universe forever.
  84. >And that itself is followed by your explosives going off.
  85. >Though you never got to see so, a part of you hopes you took out at least one wall of that Vietnamese restaurant.
  86. >One hell of a parting gift that would be!
  87. >You're there in an instant.
  88. >It doesn't even feel like you traveled, you feel like it's everything around you that's moved.
  89. >And looking around, that's not too much of a logical leap if you disregard your endless research on the subject.
  90. >You're right next to a tree in some cute looking forest area.
  91. >Looks like a cartoon alright.
  92. >Which means this actually fucking worked!
  93. >The high of having your work be validated sends you into a fit of cringe inducing dancing.
  94. >But you're in a whole different universe right now, and alone to boot.
  95. >So fuck it!
  96. >Once your weird dancing comes to an end and the adrenaline begins to fade, you notice something strange.
  97. >You're still on two legs.
  98. >Odd considering the fact that you should have changed to fit this universe.
  99. >And ponies are quadrupeds.
  100. >So, unless you're some evolutionary freak, something has probably fucked up.
  101. >Great, what could the issue be?
  102. >All expected issues would tend to involve you dying /before/ you got here.
  103. >Wait a second…
  104. >Your snout looks very odd, not at all what you expected.
  105. >You touch the snout with your hands.
  106. >Hands huh?
  107. >You're one fucked up piece of Darwinism on crack if you're a pony.
  108. >But, looking at your hands really gives you just about all the clues you need to know what's up.
  109. >There are scales on your body!
  110. >Eager to get the full picture, you look for a still body of water.
  111. >The search is rather short, what with there being a convenient pond a few yards away.
  112. >Without much hesitation, you stare into your reflection.
  113. A: “What the fuck?”
  114. >A dragoness is staring back at you.
  115. >Her piercing yellow eyes gaze unblinkingly at you.
  116. >They're so big, wide with shock and awe.
  117. >Quit being a faggot, you're having a staring contest with your reflection.
  118. >Your horns are shaped somewhat like a bull’s, but on a smaller scale.
  119. >They go straight out, then curve up.
  120. >Well, not straight out or up, but it's a little early to be bringing geometry into evaluating your looks.
  121. >Except for a pale underbelly, your body is covered in crimson red scales, With a few dark black ones towards the tip of your tail.
  122. >Not a bad color scheme!
  123. >You're getting just a little caught up in your looks as you flash a grin at yourself.
  124. >Hot damn those teeth are sharp.
  125. >Along with these claws of yours, you'd make quite the predator!
  126. >Granted a mind such as yours would never be satisfied with such base action!
  127. >Or at least you tell yourself that to feel all high and mighty.
  128. >After a bit, you've basically gotten used to the reflection.
  129. >In doing this, you expected to become a pony of some sort.
  130. >Becoming a dragon never really crossed your mind.
  131. >And honestly?
  132. >You fucking love it.
  133. >You look sleek and fit, your still somewhat tall frame doesn't leave much else to be desired.
  134. >In all honesty, you look great!
  135. >There's nothing more that you want than to stroll into Ponyville right now and introduce their newest resident, but something is somewhat pressing.
  136. >A name.
  137. >Your old name probably won't fit a fantasy setting where the only other dragon is named Spike.
  138. >So, a new name is in order!
  139. >You ponder the possibilities for a bit.
  140. >What should this draconian you be known by?
  141. >What name shall be yours from this day forth?
  142. >That's when it hits you!
  143. >Flamel.
  144. >The scholar who everyone believed was a great alchemist after death.
  145. >It's only fitting, you've technically died, and have all this juicy human world knowledge.
  146. >A comparison to being an alchemist doesn't seem too far fetched!
  147. >Besides, you like the name.
  148. >So why not?
  149. >With that settled, you decide to make your way into town
  150. >Now that you're actually relaxed enough to take in sensory details, things are definitely interesting.
  151. >Each step sees your claws dig a little into the ground.
  152. >The fresh dew on the grass denoting it's early morning is a detail you hadn't expected to find.
  153. >It seems that though this place has kept its soft, animated look to it, thing are more detailed than in the show.
  154. >It makes sense, if this universe was completely accurate, you'd be 2D.
  155. >You can't help but wonder how things are going down back on Earth.
  156. >Someone has probably called the cops by now.
  157. >All you can do is hope your “fireworks” did the trick.
  158. >The sudden anxiety over this is actually surprising.
  159. >You're a badass dragon now, you don't need to concern yourself with that!
  160. >Your walk into Ponyville takes practically no time at all.
  161. >Within six minutes, you're on the outskirts of town.
  162. >Taking a deep breath, you walk right in, swishing your tail around.
  163. >You've got this.
  164. >You own this shit!
  165. >If there was a way to measure smug bravado, you would set the standard for dangerous levels.
  166. >You recognize that, you're cocky- not stupid.
  167. >But, you have just jumped from your reality to a new one.
  168. >So you deserve this.
  169. >What's the harm of walking around like you own the place?
  170. >None that you can see!
  171. >A few ponies look at you with confusion.
  172. >New dragons are not a normal occurrence, and here you are!
  173. >Some part of you wants to playfully lunge at one of the confused looking mares to fuck with them.
  174. >But you /should/ try and make a decent first impression.
  175. >So, you settle for waving.
  176. >It's… a passable substitute.
  177. >You know exactly where you're going.
  178. >Once you find it that is.
  179. >There's a certain pony you're practically dying to meet.
  180. >Twilight Sparkle.
  181. >This is mostly because she's rather intelligent.
  182. >And most definitely not because she's your favorite character abd you're looking to love out some weird fantasy.
  183. >That would be weird!
  184. >You really don't know why you're trying to rationalize this to yourself.
  185. >Instincts maybe?
  186. >Those weird, nerdy human instincts.
  187. >After some internal debate over your “instincts”, you've found exactly what you're looking for!
  188. >With a quick knock, you prepare to be met by…
  189. >Spike.
  190. >You groan, not the local you want.
  191. S: “If you're looking for Twilight, she's not- oh hey! You're a dragon!”
  192. F: “Really? I hadn't noticed!”
  193. >Spike looks at you, confused for a second.
  194. F: “It's sarcasm.”
  195. S: “I-I knew that!”
  196. >Sure he did.
  197. >The little runt leads you inside.
  198. >Sure enough, Twilight is not here.
  199. >Looks like you're playing the waiting game.
  200. >Because that's exactly what you had in mind, jumping through hoops.
  201. >Oh well, at least you're getting tea out of it.
  202. S: “Um… would you happen to be looking for another dragon?”
  203. K: “Are you /really/ coming on to me?”
  204. >Spike blinks a little, the phrase going right over his head.
  205. S: “Um… maybe?”
  206. >You laugh wildly.
  207. >Maybe he /will/ be a little fun.
  208. S: “It's just… we have another dragon in town, and she can't remember anything.”
  209. >Another dragon, and an amnesiac at that?
  210. >You don't remember a story arc like this one.
  211. F: “What's their name?”
  212. S: “Khoa!”
  213. >Khoa.
  214. >That's… a word.
  215. >Some language’s way of saying gold.
  216. >Characters are named after real things here, yeah.
  217. >But how many characters have a foreign word as their name?
  218. F: “Tell me more..."
  219. >This “other dragon” raises so many red flags.
  220. >They appear literally out of nowhere, only remembering their name and a big fall.
  221. >But by going by normal naming conventions here, their name makes no sense.
  222. >You could really go for a drink right now.
  223. >Note to self: inquire about alcohol.
  224. F: “So… where is this Khoa?”
  225. S: “Probably working on her delivery route right now.”
  226. >A delivery route huh?
  227. >Which means they’re probably in town, but you’ll have to pinpoint where.
  228. >You’ll have to get a list of their stops, and then estimate their stride to calculate how far along it they’ve gotten.
  229. >Your skills are already going to be of use it seems!
  230. >Or, it seemed that way until the door opens.
  231. K: “Hey, Spike, Twi’s got some mail.”
  232. >Well, you /would/ have been able to figure it out.
  233. >But, as long as she’s here, might as well use that!
  234. >This “Khoa” is a shorty, that’s for sure.
  235. >Taller than Spike, but not by any notable amount.
  236. >And normally /you/ were the short one!
  237. >You can’t help but smirk at how well you won the draconian gene lottery.
  238. >Also, fittingly, Khoa is a golden color.
  239. >The name is almost too on the nose.
  240. >Granted, she could be called Goldie or some other horrible hippie garbage, but that’s beyond the point.
  241. >Once she’s handed over the letters to Spike, you turn to her.
  242. F: “Hey there, mind if we talk for a minute?”
  243. >She’s only just now getting a good look at you.
  244. >They look a little surprised to see you, probably because dragon population is so small.
  245. >Taking her lack of refusal as agreement, you kindly drag her outside.
  246. >She squirms a bit, but doesn’t pull away.
  247. >That’s a good sign!
  248. K: “So, what did you want to talk about…?”
  249. >They sound annoyed, but are hiding it behind a wall of not giving a shit.
  250. >You can respect that, but also need to get a few things straightened out.
  251. F: “Hello, I’m new to town! My name is Flamel!”
  252. >There’s a flash of recognition in their eyes.
  253. >Yeah, there’s no denying it, something is up with them.
  254. >That or you’re crazy.
  255. >The odds are a 60/40 split most likely.
  256. >But, might as well keep pressing!
  257. F: “Hmm? Do you know the name?”
  258. >Khoa looks down a little, averting eye contact.
  259. >They’re pretty awful at being secretive.
  260. >Well, that’s not exactly fair.
  261. >She’s probably great at faking amnesia when nobody can call her on her shit.
  262. >But if she /does/ have amnesia, she probably wouldn’t have recognized your name.
  263. F: “Just to clarify, my first name isn’t Nicholas, just Flamel.”
  264. >The way they jump at hearing a human name basically confirms it.
  265. >This dragon knows about humans.
  266. >You lean in close, smirking.
  267. F: “How do you know about Nicholas Flamel? Amnesia or not, how does a dragon know about a human?”
  268. >They’re trying to come up with an answer to it, but nothing seems to be coming out how they want it to.
  269. >You half expect her to try running away from you.
  270. >Hell, you half hope she does! You’d love to try running in this body.
  271. >But, no such luck for you it seems.
  272. >Khoa sighs, before dropping a little bombshell.
  273. K: “This dragon /was/ a human.”
  274. >You don’t know what you were expecting.
  275. >Honestly the idea of them actually being human didn’t cross your mind.
  276. >Yeah, it should have been at least considered, but you’re supposed to be the only former human here!
  277. >Could you really be only the second person to do this?
  278. >But, you should have seen reports on this!
  279. >Unless they covered their tracks like you did.
  280. >Dammit! How dare they steal your idea?
  281. F: “Fess up! Did you steal my research?!”
  282. >Khoa looks at you like you’ve gone crazy.
  283. K: “What the hell are you talking about?”
  284. F: “My research! You bummed off my work on multiverse theory and got here first!”
  285. >Her eyes light up almost instantly.
  286. K: “Is /that/ how I got here? W-was I some test subject?!”
  287. >That’s… scarily possible.
  288. >Maybe someone did steal your work, and had enough self preservation instinct to not send themselves first.
  289. >Fuck why didn’t you think of that?
  290. >However, the more you discuss this with Khoa, the less likely it is that she was some test subject for a rival in the field.
  291. >Based on her account, she got here after trying to kill herself.
  292. >Dark, sure, but definitely not what it would take to get her here.
  293. >You explain, in layman’s terms, the launchpad and the process of getting it to send someone.
  294. >Khoa seems disappointed by this.
  295. >It seems like she’s been trying to investigate her waking up here, and this was her biggest possible lead she’s found.
  296. >Tough shit.
  297. >As cool as some kind of multiverse hopping laser would be, there’s no way that exists and can be used with accuracy on some depressed shit head jumping from a window.
  298. >The point still stands that you are /not/ the first human to come here and randomly become a dragon.
  299. K: “So… you just got here?”
  300. >You nod, motioning for Khoa to sit down.
  301. >You’ve both been talking for a good bit, might as well get comfortable.
  302. K: “Gotcha. Hey, did you ever watch the show?”
  303. F: “Well no shit, if I didn’t I would have shot for literally any other reality. Why?”
  304. >They rub the back of their neck, trying to push out an awkward question.
  305. K: “You don’t remember them having coffee, do you?”
  306. F: “Of course not! There’s no way… wait, are you implying?”
  307. >There’s no way in hell.
  308. >They’re fucking with you, they have to be.
  309. F: “How would they even /have/ coffee?”
  310. >Your head is hurting.
  311. >Could they really have advanced far enough to start brewing coffee?
  312. >Does this mean alcohol is possible?
  313. >Focus! You've got a bigger issue right now.
  314. K: “I was hoping /you'd/ know Ms. Physics!”
  315. >You roll your eyes at your new assistant.
  316. >She hasn't exactly /officially/ become your assistant, but you could definitely benefit from having another former human working with you.
  317. >Plus she's already /assisting/ you.
  318. >So, she's your assistant as far as you're concerned!
  319. >But, less on that, more on the matter of advanced brewing techniques.
  320. >Your own exploits will have to be put on hold for a little while it seems, this is just too curious to pass up!
  321. F: “When did you drink this coffee? How was it?”
  322. K: “A week or so ago? It tasted pretty good, but was far from perfect…”
  323. >You'll have to go investigate this yourself, and once you've gotten your answers, you can do your own work.
  324. >Whatever that work will be.
  325. >You stand up, stretching a little.
  326. K: “Need me to show you the way?”
  327. F: “No, why would I? The layout here is pretty simple”
  328. >For some reason, Khoa looks a little flustered by that.
  329. K: “R-Right… lead the way then…”
  330. >With pleasure!
  331. >You're Khoa, and you don't know what to think.
  332. >Out of the blue some dragon shows up- that's weird enough.
  333. >And /then/ they start dropping references to Nicholas Flamel?
  334. >Leave it to your sorry ass to not be able to hide your recognition of the name.
  335. >Seriously, you'd be a shitty poker player if you crack this easy.
  336. >But, at least this Flamel is also formerly human.
  337. >Although from the sound of it, her coming here was very intentional, and she has no clue why you're here.
  338. >You sigh, that laser theory seemed so airtight in your head.
  339. >And now you're helping her look into something that's sort of bothered you- coffee.
  340. >You're not complaining, you love having coffee here, but the fact that it's here is very strange.
  341. >Something hits your face, snapping you out of your daze.
  342. F: “Khoa! Look!”
  343. >You sigh, looking over at the alarmed vendor and her wares.
  344. >Be sure to apologize for Flamel once we leave…
  345. >The vendor is selling fruits, nothing special.
  346. >Slightly annoyed, Flamel points at what she threw at you.
  347. >A dark cherry.
  348. K: “So?”
  349. F: “These can be used to brew coffee!”
  350. >Oh.
  351. >Oh!
  352. >Wait...
  353. K: “Really?”
  354. F: “I bet that English major has helped you /so/ much.”
  355. >Jokes on her, you dropped out!
  356. >The vendor chuckles softly.
  357. V: “You dragons and your coffee cherries… Ever since Tonic got here...”
  358. >You and Flamel simultaneously look at each other.
  359. >Who the hell is Tonic?
  360. >You are Flamel and you are chewing out your assistant.
  361. F: “You're telling me that you've been here for two months and Spike never /once/ mentioned another dragon?!”
  362. >All Khoa can do is shrug, she honestly has no idea.
  363. >Fucking English major idiot.
  364. >Apparently another dragon has been living in town, one who flat out invented coffee, and named it coffee.
  365. >They have to be human, there's no way they aren't.
  366. >So you're the /third/ to get here?
  367. >Un-fucking-believable
  368. >Khoa looks really spooked for some reason.
  369. K: “I… I asked around about other dragons! People said I was the second one to move in!”
  370. >She sure sounds adamant about this.
  371. >But this pony talks like Tonic has been here longer than Khoa.
  372. >Two humans turned dragons, neither knowing the other exists until you showed up?
  373. >Your mind is starting to race with theories.
  374. >You'll have to meet Tonic before confirming anything, but maybe your theoretical physics degree still has some use here.
  375. F: “Fuck yeah, things are getting interesting!”
  376. K: “H-hush!”
  377. >You are Tonic and you aren't sure what's going on.
  378. >This morning you woke up in a place you are definitely not familiar with.
  379. >Not your room in the castle, not any room you remember from the show, but it's vaguely familiar.
  380. >Sitting up to look around, you notice shelf of books sloppily stacked.
  381. >Looks like the books you got from the library recently.
  382. >Wait, weren't you on a train?
  383. >Spike was taller and arguably horny, Twilight was coming on to you, and that dream you had…
  384. >Maybe it's good you're /not/ dealing with that right now.
  385. >Still though, where the hell are you?
  386. >You head out of the room, finding yourself in a little shop.
  387. >Well this is new.
  388. >The room opens up to the area behind a counter, there's assorted ingredients lining the shelves and a large cauldron over to the side.
  389. >You sniff at the air, noticing a familiar smell.
  390. >Is that fucking coffee?
  391. >Upon further inspection, it looks like this place is all about making the stuff.
  392. >Since when is there a coffee shop in Ponyville?
  393. >And when did /you/ start living in it?
  394. >As you keep trying to piece together how you went from a train to apparently being a barista, the front door opens.
  395. >Why the hell wasn't your door locked? Someone could have robbed you!
  396. >No, not the time to worry about some shop you didn't even know you ran.
  397. >Two dragons just walked in.
  398. >You've definitely never seen them on the show.
  399. >The taller red one walks up to your counter like they own the place.
  400. >Hell, at this point that wouldn't surprise you.
  401. >F: “You're Tonic, yes?”
  402. >Great, it knows your name.
  403. >F: “Inventor of coffee, your ‘special tonic’, yes?”
  404. >All you can do is nod really.
  405. >This pushy red bitch points a claw at you.
  406. >F: “You are a human!”
  407. >She has no idea what she's-
  408. >Wait what did she just say?
  409. >She's officially got your attention.
  410. >As the red bitch, or Flamel as she insists, explained, apparently every dragon in the room was once human.
  411. >She got here in some crazy science experiment and the other one apparently killed herself.
  412. >What a weird duo.
  413. >F: “So, how did you get here, what was the last thing you did as a human?”
  414. To: “Um… well, it involved a heart attack and a picture of a banana…”
  415. >They're both looking at you like you're a retard.
  416. To: “I uh, mean that-”
  417. >Flamel shakes her head.
  418. F: “Just, just don't.”
  419. >You swear you can hear her mutter “faggot” under her breath.
  420. >Fucking great.
  421. >K: “Anyways… apparently you've been here for a while. And although Flamel got here today, I've been around town for months. And I've just heard of you today for the first time.”
  422. To: “That's… impossible! I've been here for a while, and not running a coffee place.”
  423. >Confused looks all around, even the bitchy one seems stumped.
  424. To: “I lived in the castle, with Princess Twilight up until today.”
  425. >Khoa looks up, surprised.
  426. >K: “Twi isn't a princess yet here!”
  427. >Bitchy gasps eagerly.
  428. >F: “Could this be a time paradox?”
  429. >Right before she gets to start rambling, the door opens again.
  430. >Another dragon.
  431. > Holy shit are you even minority anymore?
  432. >?: “Oi!”
  433. >You're Flamel and you're arguing with a british dragon.
  434. >Just as you made the stunning discovery that both Khoa and Tonic hail from not only existed in different Equestrias, but they existed at different times, /they/ showed up.
  435. >Some white dragon, wearing a leather jacket.
  436. >She demanded to know who Tonic is and how they built this place overnight.
  437. >At least, you think that's what she said.
  438. >It's like they're speaking some other, more faggoty language.
  439. >You /politely/ asked them to repeat themselves and now, well Khoa is trying to hold them back.
  440. >Because the short one is /totally/ going to be able to hold back this raging lunatic in front of you.
  441. >D: “Oi cunt! You gotta problem wit me voice?”
  442. F: “All I did was ask you to enunciate faggot!”
  443. >To: “Do you /know/ any other insults?”
  444. >D: “C’mon you Yankee bitch! Let's fuckin’ go!”
  445. >Okay, this might be spiraling a little out of control.
  446. >You're a scholar for fuck’s sake!
  447. >This poor, poor brit probably received a shit education!
  448. >It should be up to you to be the bigger person.
  449. F: “I'll kick your ass so hard, you'll be split in half more than the fuckin’ Brexit vote!”
  450. >It /should/ be up to you.
  451. >Tonic and Khoa both look at each other, worried looks on their faces.
  452. K: “Wouldn't happen to brew tranquilizers too would you?”
  453. >To: “Sure, it's right next to the aspirin I'll need for the headache I'm getting right now.”
  454. >The white dragon shoves Khoa to the side, walking right up to you.
  455. F: “Now hold on a sec-”
  456. >Their fist connects with your jaw before you can finish.
  457. >The mother fucker has a mean right hook, mean enough to knock you your ass.
  458. >Oh so that's what it's like to see stars.
  459. >That's fucking grand.
  460. D: “It's Daze, not fag ya cunt!”
  461. >Message… received.
  462. >It seems like you passed out after being punched.
  463. >By the time you come to, you half expect that white monster to kick your ribcage.
  464. >But, when you look around, it seems the other dragons are just drinking coffee.
  465. >They'd have best saved you some.
  466. >K: “Oh! Looks like Flamel is up”
  467. >Grunting, you sit up, clutching your head.
  468. >K: “Daze, apologize for knocking her out!”
  469. >The white dragon flashes a look like “Do I fucking have to?
  470. >Daze must be the British one.
  471. >Khoa shoots her own look at Daze.
  472. >And it looks like Daze relents!
  473. >What are they a couple or some shit?
  474. >D: “Eh, sorry for the aggro mate, went a little barmy back there.”
  475. >You go to mumble fuck off, but decide against it.
  476. >This Daze could, and would, fuck you right up.
  477. F: “Yeah, a’ight…”
  478. >What managed to calm Daze down?
  479. >Well, relatively calm at least.
  480. >Was it the coffee?
  481. >Khoa and Tonic perhaps?
  482. >Wait!
  483. >You don't give a shit, there are far more important things to question right now.
  484. >Things that you've been needing to ask ever since you walked in here but never managed to until now.
  485. >It's time to fulfill this duty.
  486. F: “Can I get some coffee?”
  487. >It's not the best cup of joe you've ever had, but you've had worse.
  488. >As you sip at the scalding hot brew, you wonder if any other dragons are going to show up.
  489. >At this rate it's very likely you'll see more.
  490. >They’re probably already in town, dazed and confused.
  491. >You wince, maybe just confused.
  492. >Just thinking of her makes you want to rub your jaw.
  493. >To: “So, if my life changed, I think it's safe to assume all of you have had some changes as well?”
  494. >Not a bad assumption in all honesty.
  495. F: “I mean, I suppose that's possible.”
  496. >K: “As far as I can tell, I'm still a delivery woman.”
  497. >To: “It wouldn't hurt to check if you still live where you once did, I got bounced out of the castle without even noticing.”
  498. >Why did she live in the castle anyways?
  499. >She's just some random dragon who can brew coffee.
  500. >Khoa seems to take Tonic’s suggestion to heart, getting up to leave.
  501. >K: “Want to come too Daze?”
  502. >Daze, upon hearing her name hops up, tossing her fragile cup to the ground.
  503. D: “Sure, beats faffing here with these sods.”
  504. >The two walk off, Khoa mouthing an apology to Tonic as they leave.
  505. >Tonic starts cleaning up the broken cup, sighing a little.
  506. F: “I'm going to take a shot in the dark here, you were a chemist before this, right? You managed to replicate coffee, and must have had something to offer of you lived in the castle.”
  507. >To: “Not really, no.”
  508. >Fucking…
  509. >Just, come on.
  510. >At least they aren't an English major, or some other worthless study.
  511. >That's something at least.
  512. >Or at least you hope they aren't.
  513. >You motion for Tonic to refill your drink.
  514. >Rolling her eyes, she does just that.
  515. >To: “This is all bullshit.”
  516. F: “What do you mean?”
  517. >To: “I get /somewhat/ used to living here, get caught up in some very important stuff, and just before I can get shit done… poof, I’m here.”
  518. F: “Don’t worry, I’ll figure things out. I’m a theoretical physicist, this is my forte!”
  519. >Tonic doesn’t look very confident in you, not at all.
  520. >She’s just kind of glaring at you.
  521. >You scoff a little, sure, she can think what she wants, you’ve got this.
  522. >It’ll take you no time at all once you get to work on it, maybe a couple days tops.
  523. F: “Speaking of, I think I should head to the library. Maybe they’ll have /something/ relatively useful for me to use.”
  524. >To: “You have absolutely no idea what you’re doing Flamel.”
  525. >Now it’s your turn to glare.
  526. F: “Excuse me, is a barista who had a heart attack over a shitty meme telling a fucking scientist they can’t do this? This is my area of study!”
  527. >To: “It doesn’t matter what kind of shit you know about physics, you’re living in a world with magic. I mean, I can breath fucking /acid/, you’re out of your league if you think just science played a role in this.”
  528. >Chugging down the rest of your coffee, you hand Tonic the cup.
  529. >You don’t need to listen to this, not right now.
  530. >You’re just going to go to the library and find the most relevant books you can.
  531. >And then you’re going to figure out what the hell happened, and why the hell all these other dragons are here.
  532. >And maybe you can send all these other dragons back home and have your peaceful Equestria.
  533. >The one you fucking came here for.
  534. >You are FBI agent David Carrington, and you’re pissed about being woken up from your sleep.
  535. >It was supposed to be a day off, a day for you to relax and wind down.
  536. >But at about two in the morning you get a phone call about some supposed domestic terrorism.
  537. >When you got to the site, you saw a relatively small blast site, a leveled warehouse and a few nearby buildings that were damaged.
  538. >This does not look like terrorism, not at all.
  539. >Why would some terrorist blow up a random warehouse?
  540. >Sighing a little to yourself, you look over at the beat cop on the scene.
  541. Da: “So, why exactly was I called out here? Looks like your average arson to me.”
  542. >C: “Yeah, that’s what it looks like, but there’s a few things that just… they’re not normal.”
  543. >They hand you something, looks like it’s a witness report.
  544. >You start reading it over, it looks like it’s by the owner of the next door restaurant.
  545. >Apparently the tenant of this warehouse lived there, and would constantly reroute power to the warehouse, among other weird things.
  546. >Sure, that’s weird, but what makes this terrorism?
  547. >The cop notices your skepticism, taking the report.
  548. >C: “Traffic camera nearby caught the tenant enter the warehouse twenty minutes before the explosion. She never left. Yet, there’s no sign of a body in the rubble.”
  549. Da: “You’re kidding, right?”
  550. >They shake their head.
  551. >C: “We also managed to recover the hardrive from their computer, looks like most of their files are encrypted to hell.”
  552. >You mutter a curse, it looks like this is going to be a longer night than you wanted.
  553. >Some random woman has been syphoning power, somehow isn’t found dead after their warehouse is leveled, and has some heavy encryptions on her shit.
  554. >Maybe calling the FBI was not an exaggerated choice.
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