RSHS 4: Renee Is A Human Timetable

"Mmmmmmmmmmmay." Ian leaned casually at the door of the gym and played a comedic entrance sting on his ukulele.
"How many rooms have you entered that way while you were looking for me?" She asked, deadpan.
"Six, not important. What is important is your good friend Ara."
"Good friend?"
"Your casual acquaintance Ara."
May did a waving motion with her hand.
"Fellow cheerleader Ara."
"Accurate." She folded her arms over her frankly ridiculous cleavage, "Now what do you want?"
"I was wondering if your good chearleading acquaintance Ara would have a date to accompany her to the dance?"
"As a matter of fact, she doesn't. What's it to you?"
"I was planning on asking her myself, and I was wondering if you had any advice?"
"If you have access to a puppy, just keep that with you while you ask her. She'll be putty in your hands."
"Would a kitten work?"
"Anything tiny, furred, and insipid, yeah. In fact, Ara may be one of the few humans on the planet with such a lack of appreciation for music that a serenade from you is a viable seduction technique."
"Thanks." Ian turned to leave.
"That- that wasn't a compliment." May watched him leave. "I'm fine, Ian, thanks for asking. It's good to know you care." She mumbled to herself.

"Rrreeen-" Ian began.
"Is this about Amy?" Renee cut him off.
"Aw what?" Ian lowered his ukulele despondently, "How'd you know?"
"Eddie told me you had her lined up for him."
"Booo. It's lame when you know my intricate plots beforehand. So is she free for the dance or not?"
Renee looked up and down the hallway, "Yes, and you should get Eddie to ask her himself. She has a mad crush on Eddie. But don't tell him that. She'll like it more if he's acting natural."
"Okay. Cool. Cool."
"She has karate after school today, the same time Eddie has baseball practice. She walks home over the back fields, which will be the opportune time for Eddie to ask her out. She thinks he looks hot in his uniform and the sun will be setting behind them." She slowed her speech down as Ian took out a lawyer's pad and started taking notes, "Now tell me that I rock."
"It's against principle, but you rock, Renee."
"Good boy. Now hithen thee forth to your bro, and tell him where his lady shall await." She pointed dramatically.
"Aye aye, captain." He saluted and ran off as the bell rang.
"Other way."
"Testing you!" He span on his toes and ran past her.