Poop Grist

==START!==
[01:11] <Roland> You'd just damaged the huge beast. Anything else?
[01:12] <Cerxes> I asked if this counted as a new "strife"
[01:12] <Roland> It does.
[01:12] <Roland> Would you like to do blood tinge?
[01:12] <Cerxes> I'll save it for next turn and just stick with Intimidate
[01:13] <Roland> You like the risky shit, huh? Ought to have vamp look at the numbers on that to confirm that the reward outweighs the risk
[01:13] <Cerxes> Did I roll for that?
[01:13] <Roland> Don't think so.
[01:13] <Roland> Use any dice you like; EB can be a shit
[01:13] <Cerxes> I'll use my phone dice roller then
[01:13] <Roland> Dope
[01:14] <Roland> Roll away.
[01:15] <Cerxes> 10+4=14
[01:15] <Roland> !roll 1d20-1
[01:15] <GameServ> Roland rolled 1d20: 11  <Total: 11(-1) = 10>
[01:16] <Roland> Success! People write off the intimidate, when really they shouldn't.
[01:16] <Roland> Wanna add a one-liner?
[01:17] <Cerxes> Nah, I just wanna imagine this cute little magical girl putting off crazy killing aura.
[01:17] <Roland> Fair. You're 30 feet from him. Interested in attempting a good ol' kite, or do you just wanna stand and fight?
[01:19] <Cerxes> Stand and fight :)
[01:20] <Roland> Awesome. End turn?
[01:20] <Roland> Lemme getcher sheet
[01:20] <Cerxes> Yep
[01:20] <Roland> Okay
[01:21] <Roland> The beast doesn't use his move action. Instead, he leaps 30 feet forward, attempting to knock you prone and pin you.
[01:21] <Cerxes> Ooh, cool
[01:21] <Roland> !roll 1d20+3
[01:21] <GameServ> Roland rolled 1d20: 6  <Total: 6(+3) = 9>
[01:21] <Roland> You combat out of the way like a badass.
[01:21] <Cerxes> Er... do I oppose that or
[01:21] <Roland> Nah
[01:22] <Cerxes> YOUTH ROLL
[01:22] <Roland> Targets dex resistance
[01:22] <Roland> That's a full round action for the guy. Wew lass, it's your turn
[01:22] <Cerxes> Ok
[01:23] <Cerxes> FIRST, blood tinge
[01:23] <Cerxes> Oh, no wait
[01:23] <Cerxes> I've got the arrow in.
[01:23] <Cerxes> •°♡°• sunlight breaker!!!•°♡°•
[01:24] <Cerxes> 17+8= NERF DIS
[01:24] <Roland> Haha, nice
[01:24] <Roland> A success. Roll appropriate damage
[01:25] <Cerxes> 7+10+6+4+3+8=38 dmg
[01:25] <Roland> Fuck yes
[01:26] <Roland> You still have minor, da?
[01:26] <Cerxes> Yeah, I'll do Blood Tinge for that. It combos really well with Regain
[01:27] <Roland> I noticed actually. Need to add some cool shit for the actual bow form; you never use it
[01:27] <Roland> Alright. If I recall correctly, you have to roll damage
[01:28] <Cerxes> Right; 3d6, for 9 dmg.
[01:28] <Roland> Excellent.
[01:28] <Roland> It's time for the creature's turn, lessin' you intend to move.
[01:29] <Cerxes> Eh, I'll kite, since it can apparently jump.
[01:30] <Roland> Move as you like. I think his move is halved rn? I never bothered resisting the check, cause the DC is too low imo
[01:31] <Cerxes> It's like 15...?
[01:31] <Roland> Yeah. It doesn't work at later levels
[01:31] <Cerxes> Point is I want to move just out of range if possible.
[01:31] <Roland> Go for it
[01:32] <Cerxes> And that's my turn.
[01:32] <Roland> 30 feet, and, hm, swift mercy?
[01:32] <Roland> Did you already use your minor?
[01:34] <Roland> Blood tinge is a minor?
[01:35] <Cerxes> Yeah.
[01:35] <Roland> Damn.
[01:36] <Cerxes> So just regular movement, no Swift Action.
[01:36] <Roland> The creature eschews the jump for the present in favor of staggering forward 15 feet and taking a huge breath, then breathing fire. Hell's bells! We are cooking with petrol now!
[01:36] <Roland> !roll 1d20+1
[01:36] <GameServ> Roland rolled 1d20: 3  <Total: 3(+1) = 4>
[01:37] <Roland> Another successful dodge on your part. Also
[01:37] <Roland> !roll 1d6
[01:37] <GameServ> Roland rolled 1d6: 2  <Total: 2>
[01:37] <Roland> Okay. Now it's your turn again.
[01:38] <Cerxes> Well dang, that's metal as heck.
[01:38] <Roland> Fuck yeah
[01:38] <Cerxes> Guess I'll just BEAT THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUTTA IT
[01:39] <Cerxes> 17+4=21 to hit
[01:39] <Roland> A reasonable reaction to being breathed on.
[01:39] <Roland> A success.
[01:39] <Roland> Roll damage.
[01:40] <Cerxes> Ok now this is gonna take some counting cause I basically just rolled the equivalent of the fluorite octet
[01:40] <Roland> Lol
[01:40] <Roland> Okay
[01:41] <Cerxes> (5+7+2+4+1)+(2+7+5)+4=(19)+(14)+4=37 dmg
[01:41] <Cerxes> I think
[01:41] <Cerxes> And not a single 8.
[01:41] <Cerxes> Vriska you're a shit patron troll
[01:41] <Roland> I'mma fuck up your shit vriska
[01:42] <Roland> You've a minor and move
[01:42] <Cerxes> Move back 30 feet and you know what I haven't done a skirt swish in a while let's charm the doggo
[01:42] <Roland> Roll it
[01:43] <Cerxes> What do I roll again, CHA? It's been a while.
[01:43] <Roland> It's been a while. Lemme look at your sheet
[01:43] <Roland> It's basically an inferior intimidate but I think you roll performance for it
[01:44] <Cerxes> Well we said it made them roll attack at disadvantage
[01:44] <Cerxes> Cause dat thigh flash.
[01:44] <Roland> Your sheet says -1
[01:44] <Cerxes> Oh does it
[01:44] <Roland> But I'll give you disadvantage if you want
[01:44] <Cerxes> Eh, go with that then
[01:44] <Roland> Roll away Sai
[01:45] <Cerxes> 13+5=18
[01:45] <Roland> !roll 1d20
[01:45] <GameServ> Roland rolled 1d20: 8  <Total: 8>
[01:45] <Roland> Eyy lmao
[01:45] <Cerxes> WOW IT WORKED FOR ONCE
[01:45] <Cerxes> I don't think it's done that for 10 levels
[01:45] <Roland> I think it worked in PvP
[01:46] <Cerxes> I... don't think so, Prexor just thought I was flirting with him and was weirded out, IIRC
[01:46] <Roland> The non canon one with Roland
[01:46] <Cerxes> Didn't work
[01:46] <Cerxes> Should have
[01:46] <Cerxes> Somehow didnt
[01:47] <Roland> Yeah
[01:47] <Roland> Roland's... Yeah
[01:47] <Roland> Anyway, you win the roll!
[01:47] <Cerxes> WOOO
[01:47] <Roland> Our boy moves forward 25 feet, then swipes at you twice with his claws (with reach)
[01:47] <Roland> No
[01:48] <Roland> Wait
[01:48] <Roland> It's once if he wants reach
[01:48] <Roland> !roll 2d20+5
[01:48] <GameServ> Roland rolled 2d20: 10 16  <Total: 26(+5) = 31>
[01:48] <Roland> He fails.
[01:48] <Roland> Sittin' pretty, huh? It's your turn.
[01:48] <Cerxes> We should revamp this, it's still funny
[01:49] <Roland> ?
[01:50] <Cerxes> The skirt swoosh
[01:50] <Roland> Haha, we can do that. I have some ideas from Chang'e in smite
[01:50] <Cerxes> Anyway, another •°♡°• heavenly silver arrow! •°♡°•
[01:50] <Roland> Imagine healing allies with a skirt swish
[01:50] <Roland> Ah wait
[01:50] <Cerxes> Omg that'd be adorable
[01:50] <Roland> !roll 2d4
[01:50] <GameServ> Roland rolled 2d4: 3 4  <Total: 7>
[01:51] <Roland> Okay. And yes, it would.
[01:51] <Roland> Just need to make the mechanics
[01:51] <Roland> Sorry. Roll your attack
[01:51] <Cerxes> M. 8+4=12
[01:52] <Roland> You miss the hit, I'm afraid, but I'm gonna tether him anyways.
[01:53] <Cerxes> O K
[01:53] <Roland> I guess it's 30 feet distance between you two?
[01:53] <Cerxes> Yeah
[01:53] <Roland> Excellent
[01:53] <Cerxes> Or... 35? Was confused about the reach thin
[01:53] <Roland> Anything else?
[01:53] <Roland> ... Yeah, 35
[01:54] <Roland> You should still have a minor.
[01:54] <Cerxes> Hm. So the Swift Action penalty, does that just attach itself to the next attack?
[01:55] <Cerxes> I mean Swift Mercy
[01:56] <Roland> You wanna try something? Call for assistance. If you wanna use swift mercy, that works too. I attach it to attacks within the same turn, as a weird chase mechanism
[01:57] <Cerxes> Sure, I'll call for help! That's kinda cool.
[01:57] <Roland> You hear humming in your earpiece.
[01:58] <Roland> https://youtu.be/G7pwSiU2diU
[02:00] == dualisticArcanist [[email protected]] has quit [Ping timeout: 195 seconds]
[02:01] <Roland> Oh! right! Thought you wanted to RP it.
[02:01] <Roland> !roll 1d20+6
[02:01] <GameServ> Roland rolled 1d20: 17  <Total: 17(+6) = 23>
[02:01] <Cerxes> I haven't played MGSV yet Bill
[02:02] <Roland> Ah.
[02:02] <Cerxes> I know, I am disappoint
[02:02] <Roland> You hear the crack of a sniper rifle a few hundred feet away as Cade begins supporting fire.
[02:02] <Roland> !roll 4d8+6
[02:02] <GameServ> Roland rolled 4d8: 8 3 2 6  <Total: 19(+6) = 25>
[02:02] <Roland> The shot impacts the beast in the shoulder as Cade gives you a thumbs up
[02:03] <Cerxes> Cerxes turns around and excitedly gives Cade a return thumbs up, with both hands. Please imagine blood-spattered cutie making this face: : D
[02:05] <Roland> Am doing so. Roll charisma with advantage
[02:06] <Cerxes> Pffffft Nat 20 on adorabloodthirstiness
[02:06] <Roland> *Homeric.*
[02:07] <Roland> I'll add double your charisma mod to his next shot.
[02:07] <Cerxes> Aww ♢
[02:07] <Cerxes> Anyway, move back and then it's end turn.
[02:07] <Roland> The creature limps forward, then breathes more fire at you.
[02:07] <Roland> !roll 1d20+1
[02:07] <GameServ> Roland rolled 1d20: 8  <Total: 8(+1) = 9>
[02:08] <Cerxes> I feel kinda sad for it
[02:08] <Roland> His INT is as high as I can justify for a ravenous beast tbh
[02:09] <Roland> !roll 1d2
[02:09] <GameServ> Roland rolled 1d2: 2  <Total: 2>
[02:09] <Cerxes> I'd like to use my minor to just like. Drub it on its snout and say "•°♡°• stop that! •°♡°•"
[02:09] <Roland> Wow, really don't want that pounce back, huh?
[02:09] <Roland> Roll to hit
[02:09] <Roland> STR, I reckon
[02:09] <Cerxes> Ok was just about to ask, what mod is a light drubbing
[02:10] <Roland> "One drubbing for Ammet, please."
[02:10] <Cerxes> 9+0=9, how incredibly slightly below average
[02:10] <Roland> It's sufficient for a slight drubbing. Now roll charisma
[02:11] <Cerxes> 5+2=7
[02:11] <Cerxes> ... fuck that I'm Luckying
[02:11] <Roland> Go for it
[02:11] <Cerxes> I wanna see how hilarious we can make this
[02:12] <Cerxes> 16+2=18
[02:12] <Cerxes> That's better
[02:12] <Roland> The beast's ears flatten against his head, and he whimpers.
[02:13] <Roland> It does a turn on the spot, then makes to return to the woods.
[02:13] <Cerxes> Omg yes
[02:13] <Roland> Also, since I want it to drop grist, it poops grist in shame as it leaves
[02:14] <Cerxes> Lovely
[02:15] <Roland> Man I just want to give grist and don't wanna explode the poor bastard for no reason
[02:15] <Cerxes> You could say the aircraft was full of grist for no reason
[02:15] <Roland> Eh okay
[02:15] <Roland> If you like that better, that's what happens
[02:16] <Cerxes> Meesh insists on poop grist
[02:16] <Cerxes> I'm 0kay with this
[02:16] <Roland> Well she's not the player in question
[02:16] <tangledThespian> (I want to watch the world burn. In poop grist)
[02:17] <Roland> In poop grist.
[02:17] <Roland> Welp. I guess it's a meme now
[02:17] <Cerxes> I'm good with poop grist, Bill, really.
[02:17] <vampsquirrel> (It's not about the poop grist. It's about sending a message.)
[02:17] <Roland> Plus side: it doesn't smell like poop.
[02:17] <Roland> So you got that going for you.
[02:17] <Cerxes> Well that's good
[02:17] <Roland> Which is nice.
[02:17] <tangledThespian> (And the message is 'holy shit that doggo just pooped out part of it's intestinal tract')
[02:18] <Roland> That ends the strife as the other beasts flee.
[02:18] <vampsquirrel> (Jesus Christ, Cerxes, how hard did you drub it?!)
[02:18] <Cerxes> (Not that hard really. But it still may have had some internal bleeding from those previous hits.)
[02:18] <Roland> Another good hit woulda done it in, so fuck it, whatever. This was a better ending.
[02:18] <Cerxes> Yes. Yes it was.
[02:19] <Roland> Alright. Gain 1500 XP while I decide what to roll here
[02:19] <Cerxes> Wheeee!
[02:21] <Roland> 1237 build
[02:21] <Roland> 372 t1
[02:21] <Roland> 150 t2
[02:21] <Roland> 49 t3
[02:21] <Roland> 18 t4
[02:21] <Roland> 7 t5
[02:21] <Roland> 2 t6
[02:22] <Cerxes> Yaaaaaaay
[02:22] <Cerxes> And I'd like to use that grist to BUILD ME THE FUCK UP
[02:23] <Cerxes> SO I CAN ACTUALLY GO PLACES
[02:23] <Roland> Awesome. Talk to good friend Ratosk
[02:23] <Cerxes> Will do
[02:23] <Roland> ==END!==