TCS havoc dvd

Rey Mysterio: The Biggest Little Man (bold, underline, center)

Back in San Diego, Rey explained that after he lost the WCW cruiserweight title back to Dean Malenko, he was eager to prove himself once again. If you haven’t figured it out by now, this DVD is totally produced for children. These segments are 100 percent work, and offer zero interesting insight to the matches or Rey’s career in general. Pity.

Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Jushin Thunder Liger. From Starrcade on Dec. 20, 1996. This was the US-vs.-Japan show. At this point, Ultimo Dragon and Akira Hokuto had already won to put Japan up 2-0. Rey started a “USA!” chant. Liger just put his hands on his hips like he couldn’t believe this nonsense. They shook hands before starting. Mike Tenay told us this was the first-ever match between these two. Liger took over early with a hard slam and a jumping suplex as Tenay talked about his comeback from a brain tumor. He was playing the complete bully here, methodically circling the ring and – OH MY GOD. He just powerbombed Mysterio TO DEATH. God, that looked like it sucked. So Liger was taking his sweet time, then Rey ran wild with ranas and flippy-dos, and Liger bailed to the floor, looking like he had no idea what had just hit him. Keep in mind, he got this across even though he was wearing a full mask. He apparently decided that he’d had enough of this bullshit, because he suplexed Rey from the ring to the floor. Rey is taking a fucking BEATING in this match. And as I typed that, Liger grabbed Rey and POWERBOMBED HIM ON THE FLOOR. Jesus Christ. Later, they struggled on the top rope. Rey shoved Liger to the mat, but missed a diving rana, splatting flat on his back. It SUCKS to be Rey Mysterio here. Liger hooked a surfboard. Rey sold it by shaking his head up and down, then back and forth. Announcers were annoyed because they didn’t know if he had submitted or not. Yes. Rey came back with a German suplex. That’s one you don’t see often. Rey hooked a camel clutch. He released it to try a springboard dropkick, but Liger kicked him HARD coming in. Liger hit his own German suplex for two, then hooked a half-crab. I hope they’re going a long time, because so far there wasn’t much heat for this. Liger hit a dragon screw legwhip. Tenay called it, and Dusty Rhodes bust a gut. Bobby Heenan offered to hit the concession stand. THIS COMMENTARY BLOWS. Rey whipped out a top rope Asai moonsault, and Liger had to run to get underneath and catch him. They teased a double-countout there. Rey missed a springboard splash. Liger followed with a diving headbutt for two. Rey made a comeback and tried a springboard move, but Liger pushed him off to the floor. Rey came back and tried a top rope rana, but somehow both guys landed on their feet. Liger followed with a Koppo Kick (I’m sure I’ve spelled that terribly wrong) and a Ligerbomb for the three-count. This was nowhere near as good as you’d expect, and the crowd never really cared about it.

Rey said it sucked to lose, but at least he’d been part of another thrilling cruiserweight match and had given the fans what they wanted.

Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Ultimo Dragon. From Spring Stampede, 4/6/97. Rey wins immediate style points for debuting a furry vest. Announcers noted that the winner of this match would be in line for a shot at the cruiserweight title, held by – brace yourself – SYXX. That just seems so wrong. Announcers discussed Rey’s name appearing in the National Enquirer. I think Jennifer Aniston said he was her favorite wrestler or something. They did a bunch of chain wrestling, with flips and whatnot. Crowd was significantly more into this than they had been into the previous match. Dragon applauded Rey’s efforts, then released the Attack of a Million Kicks. He applied a cross armbreaker. Rey did not tap out. Wait, yes he did, but that wasn’t a finish in wrestling yet. The commentary died for about 30 seconds here. Don’t know who would have been talking they’d have to edit out. Dragon busted out the Atlantida, better than Atlantis has ever done it. He followed with a powerbomb, held on and hoisted Rey backwards, neck-first onto the top rope. Awesome. He followed with a sleeper. Crowd cheered Rey on. Dragon hit the VERY SCARY running powerbomb. Heenan chastised Dragon for not making the cover. Dragon hooked a tombstone and got it after a long struggle. He went for a cover, but pulled Rey up at two, then went back to the sleeper. Announcers figured he was determined to beat Rey by submission. He hit a series of kicks, then hooked a bridging Indian deathlock. He switched to a surfboard, but Rey escaped and bailed to the floor. Dragon followed, but Rey sent him into the guardrail. And then, they just got back in the ring, and Dragon quickly put the sleeper on again. Weird moment there. Rey followed with a sleeper of his own and everyone screamed. Dragon bailed. Rey teased one dive, nearly taking out a cameraman in the process, then hit a Silver King dive into a flip tope. Coolness! Announcers disappeared again, and it seemed like they were adding crowd noise. They took turns trying to climb to the top rope, then Dragon hit a dropkick, sending Rey to the floor. Dragon hit a baseball dropkick, skinned the cat and hit a plancha. Great stuff. They got back in. Rey went for a quebrada, but Dragon met him with a dropkick and Rey landed on his brain. OW. Dragon followed with a giant swing for a double-countout. Rey did a cartwheel, landing on Dragon’s shoulders and hitting a victory roll for two, then Dragon reversed it for two. Dragon hit a top rope rana that looked like the finish, but Rey got his foot under the ropes. They did an amazing sequence of rollups and counters and teased suplexes, then Rey bounced off the middle rope and rolled up Dragon with a rana for the pin. Crowd went batshit. That was a GREAT finish to a FANTASTIC match, probably the best on this DVD so far. (Though that Nitro match with Malenko was also great.) And thus ends disc one.

Disc Two opens with Rey walking by his tattoo shop. Rey noted this was where he had just gotten his “E.G.” tattoo. He said he and Eddie Guerrero always said it wasn’t the size of the dog in the fight, but the size of the fight in the dog.

Rey Mysterio vs. Eddie Guerrero. From, and I quote the DVD listing here, “Halloween House,” 10/26/97. Rey came out in his PHANTOM~! costume. SLAM EVIL! This was Eddie’s belt vs. Rey’s mask. Eddie came out with his mullet and his SUPER PHAT lowrider music and Tony Schiavonie outright called Eddie pound-for-pound the best wrestler in the world. Loud “EDDIE SUCKS!” chants. So they started a million miles an hour. Within the first minute, we saw Rey send both guys tumbling to the floor with a bodypress, Eddie yank Rey from the apron to the floor, then Rey take the HARDEST HIT EVER into the stairs. Eddie took over back in the ring. They were working their ASSES off, hitting every move like it was the last one of their lives. Eddie hit a tilt-a-whirl for two, then tore at Rey’s mask. He hooked an abdominal stretch so he could yank at the mask more. He switched that to a pumphandle backbreaker. More “EDDIE SUCKS!” chants as they fought over a series of nearfalls. Heenan was appalled to learn that Rey’s original name had been “hummingbird.” And speaking of birds, Rey flipped off the top rope and dropped Eddie with a DDT on the landing. He went for another dive, but Eddie dodged and sent Rey to the floor. He hooked a camel clutch back in the ring and tore away at Rey’s mask more. He let that go and hooked a Gory Special. Rey countered with an armdrag, but Eddie put a stop to that with a low dropkick. He hit a REAL hard elbow, made a cover and put his foot on the ropes right in front of the ref, just to be a dick. He worked Rey over in the corner. Rey made a great little fiery comeback, but Eddie cut him off right away and hung Rey in the tree of woe. He went for a baseball slide dropkick, but Rey dodged and Eddie nutted the post. This spot has been done a million times, but nobody’s ever hit the post faster than Eddie did here. He bailed to the floor, and Rey hit a HYOOGE plancha from the top rope. Back in, Rey busted out a rana for a nearfall that fooled everyone. Eddie kicked out and clotheslined his head off. A complicated series of counters sent Eddie to the floor, then Rey hit a flip tope into a rana. Um, HOLY FUCKING SHIT. He followed that with Jeff Hardy’s Whisper in the Wind, only Jeff’s looks like shit compared to this. Eddie cut him off and hit a MIGHTY POWERBOMB for another great nearfall. “EDDIE SUCKS!” Eddie charged, but Rey pushed him into the corner, then hit a spinwheel kick. He went for a springboard something-or-other, but Eddie caught him in a backbreaker. “BOO!” Eddie went for the frog splash, but Rey dodged. After a long struggle on top, Eddie hooked Rey for a Splash Mountain off the second rope, but Rey countered it in midair with a rana for the pinfall. Rey grabbed his belt and began to cut a tearful promo into the camera, but Eddie jumped him from behind and dumped him from the ring. Rey retreated to the back as Eddie stood in the ring, just as angry as before. When I reviewed this match for the Eddie DVD, I think I said I didn’t like it as much as everyone else did. Well, having watched it twice now, I can confirm that I was a FOOL, because this match FUCKING RULES. GO BUY THIS DVD NOW.


TV/DVD Reviews (bold, underline, center)