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- Ol_Dirty, April 12, 2012 / PB 165840
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- >You are the unicorn leader of a herd of feral fluffy ponies
- >You and your people are escaping the coming winter and following a fluffy pony named Wiggly to his home
- >His *human* home
- >The journey has taken you a full day already
- >Wiggly told you it was a long trip
- >5 whole miles
- >The top speed of the average fluffy pony is about 5 miles an hour
- >Meaning the trip took Wiggly about an hour, which to a fluffy pony seems like a really long time
- >You of course don't understand any of this
- >As smart as the brave leader Raindancer is, you are still a fluffy pony and as such have a terrible understanding of time, distance and velocity
- >Anyway...
- >There were 50 of you when you left
- >Traveling in a pack makes things extremely difficult for fluffies
- >As said, the trip has taken your group an entire day
- >They get distracted by pretty flowers and get left behind and someone has go back and get them
- >Not a minute goes by without some fluffy having to stop for a shit
- >Their little legs get tired quickly and they have to stop for a break
- >Others volunteer to carry the tired ones on their back but the added weight tires them out even faster and they both have to stop for a break
- >Some fluffies just forget to keep walking and stop to randomly hug each other
- >You have to pull them apart and get them moving again
- >"Awe we thewe yet?"
- >That one fucking sentence! Over and over again!
- >One might say fluffies aren't meant to be nomads
- >You say fuck that noise!
- >Making it through adversities like this is exactly the kind of thing the brave leader Raindancer prides himself on!
- >Many of the fluffies fell into rivers or got stuck in thorn bushes along the way
- >Whether or not to waste even more time helping them out is a tough choise
- >Some got out quickly, others didn't
- >Being a leader means minimizing your people's suffering, many lives had to be ended
- >Everyone but you, Wiggly and your friend and advisor Rustle were concidered expendable
- >The pregnant mares recieved extra help too
- >Wiggly was the worst
- >When he wasn't getting stuck between rocks or something, he was complaining about one thing or another
- >"Weggies huwt" "Mud no smeww pwetty" "Wiggwy wan' food"
- >Bah! Stupid weakling pet pony!
- >However, he did make for the most interesting conversation around
- >He told you all about the human's house
- >"The big white gate with food inside" and "the little river that never freezes" are the things that most interest you about your new home
- >When you finally arrive at Wiggly's home, there are 28 of you left
- >You, Wiggly, Rustle, 6 pregnant mares, 6 foals and 13 of the strongest and smartest males
- >The house is right there in the middle of the woods
- >It's big and red just like Wiggly told you
- >"Hewe we awe" Wiggly says
- >Joy and relief overtake the herd as they gaze upon their new home
- >You stare at the house, not batting an eyelash
- >Who knows what wicked things the human has stored there
- >"Why Waindancew no happy?" Rustle comes up and asks
- >"Oh, Waindancew vewy happy" you answer, still staring at the house
- >You sure don't look happy
- >"Wustwe" you say "No fwuffy go inside 'till I inspect, 'kay?"
- >Rustle nods and leaves to tend the herd
- >"Wiggwy, pwease, show me awound"
- >"Okay, fwiend!" he answers
- >You follow him to the house through the pet door
- >It sure is warm in there
- >The way the walls just stand there limiting your movement is creepy
- >The ceiling blocking the sunlight is equally creepy
- >There are little transparent spots in the walls where you can see outside
- >The ground is hard like a rock yet warm
- >This place is fucking weird
- >Wiggly shows you to the kitchen
- >"Hewe is white food gate" he tells you
- >You grab the little appendage on it with your teeth and pull
- >The gate opens as expected, revealing an abundance of fresh food inside
- >There are also some weird, metallic tube things in there
- >You suspect these hold some sort of human food inside them
- >Your fluffies aren't gonna eat it, that's for sure
- >"And hewe is small wivew tha' don' fweeze" Wiggly continues his tour
- >Wiggly is pointing up at a ledge
- >You jump up to see what he's talking about
- >Another weird metallic thing
- >Once again, you pull on the little appendage on it and just as you thought, a little streams starts running
- >You push the appendage down and it stops
- >This is pretty much all you needed to know
- >Yet Wiggly wants to show you more
- >He shows you the bathroom
- >He explains how the thing on the wall makes an even bigger river
- >"Bu' dadde sez tha's no fow fwuffie's use"
- >No one here gives a fuck what your "daddy" says, Wiggly...
- >"And dis is whewe Wiggwy make poopies... Sometimes"
- >What's that supposed to mean?
- >"Most times Wiggwy make poopies outside in gawden. Dadde sez fwuffy poo make food gwow fwom gwound"
- >Suddenly Wiggly becomes real quiet
- >"But fwuffies no poopies on fwoow or get sowwy stick" he shudders at his own mention of the enigmatic sorry stick
- >You've been meaning to ask about that
- >You've been meaning to ask about that
- >"Wiggwy, wha' is sowwy stick?"
- >Wiggly stares at the floor for a while before slowly walking over to a corner, you follow him
- >"Dis is sowwy stick..."
- >Wiggly points at a big stick leaning against the wall
- >It has some kind of bristle at one end
- >A big stick reserved for punishing bad fluffies
- >You kinda like that idea
- >Doesn't seem like something a fluffy could easily handle though
- >You'll find a way
- >"Wha' excactwy happen to youw dadde?" you ask
- >"Wiggwy dunno. One day dadde pick up boomstick and go ou'. Dadde awways come back, bu' no' dis time."
- >Boomstick, huh? So this human's a hunter
- >You secretly hope a fucking bear mauled him to death
- >Wiggly remains silent for a second and continues the tour
- >There are lots of warm, soft places to sleep
- >Nothing outside of the food gate and the mini-river really inpresses you
- >Wiggly takes you to the living room
- >"Dis whewe dadde and Wiggwy watch movies togethew" Wiggly says
- >You immediately jump on the tv stand and kick the thing as hard as you can, breaking the screen
- >"Wah? Nuuuuuuu!" Wiggly cries
- >"Quiet!" you yell "Fwuffies wiww watch no human gawbage in dis house any wongew!"
- >There are tears in Wiggly's eyes
- >He can't believe what just did to his favourite toy
- >Pathetic pet pony...
- >You don't even know what a tv is, but it looked exactly like the kind of wicked human contraption that could easily poison a fluffy's mind
- >And judging by Wiggly's reaction, it already has
- >You've seen enough
- >Wiggly has explained to you all he can, the tour ends here
- >You go back outside through the pet door
- >Wiggly follows, still mourning the loss of the tv
- >"Fwuffies can go in now" you tell your people "Pwaised be Fwuddy God!"
- >"Pwaised be! Pwaised be!" the herd yells as they squeeze through the hole in the door
- >Upon seeing so many excited ponies, Wiggly gets excited too, forgetting all about his sorrows
- >"Wiggwy!" you catch his attention as he too tries to force himself through the pet door
- >"We stiww need tawk"
- >Wiggly looks at you confused
- >You start walking across the yard
- >When you came to the house, you noticed a little stream run past the frontyard behind some bushes
- >You go there
- >Wiggly follows
- >All the others are inside
- >You and Wiggly stand there alone
- >"Wiggwy, you know tha' hewd fwuffies and human fwiend fwuffies no make easy fwiends, wight?"
- >Wiggly doesn't seem to understand
- >"Hewd fwuffies and human fwiend fwuffies vewy diffewen', Wiggwy"
- >"B-bu' Wiggwy make g-good fwiends wid hewd fwuffies. Wiggwy make good f-fwiends wid Waindancew" he stutters in confusion "W-wiggwy wuv Waindancew!"
- >"No Wiggwy. No' good fwiends wid Waindancew. Waindancew can nevew wuv fwiend of humans" you state calmly
- >Wiggly starts to tear up again
- >"No wuv Wiggwy?" he whimpers
- >"Wiggwy's wuv make hewd human fwiends too" you say "Waindancew can no' we' tha' happen"
- >Wiggly is openly sobbing
- >You bow, hanging your head below his
- >"May Fwuffy God have mewcy on you, Wiggwy. And angews take you to pwace whewe fwuffies nevew go hungwy" you whisper
- >*STAB*
- >With a speed almost unnatural for a fluffy, you drive your horn into his jugular vein, pinning him to the tree behind him
- >Wiggwy tries tries to scream, but only comes out
- >You block his flailing forehooves with your own and start shaking your head left and right, stretching the wound, allowing him to die faster
- >Within 10 seconds he stops moving
- >You drag him over by your horn and throw him into the stream
- >His body floats away
- >You take a deep breath and submerge your head in the water, letting the stream wash the blood off
- >You pull out, shake your head to dry off and head inside
- >At the door there's Rustle, blocking your path
- >"Move, Wustwe" you demand
- >He doesn't comply
- >"No Waindancew, answew fiwst" he says "Why kiww Wiggwy, Waindancew?"
- >Rustle couldn't have seen what you did
- >But Rustle is smarter than the average fluffy, he can just tell
- >"Why Waindancew?" he repeats
- >"Beacuse Wiggwy was menace to hewd's integwity" you answer "Wiggwy would make us aww weak wike him"
- >"Wiggwy was no menace! Wiggwy was fwiend to hewd!" Rustle insists
- >"He was menace. Wiggwy would spoiw aww ouw bwains! Smawty fwiend says so!" you shout
- >Rustle stares at you saying nothing
- >You can see hatred in his eyes
- >The two of you are best friends, he wouldn't think of hurting you
- >"Fine den" Rustle says with a hint of sarcasm in his voice "If smawty fwiend says so"
- >Rustle steps aside, letting you pass
- >"Wustwe wiww thank Waindancew fow dis one day" you proclaim "Waindancew is awways wight"
- >After walking past Rustle you turn your head back at him
- >"Thewe nevew was a Wiggwy, 'kay?"
- >Rustle takes moment to answer
- >"Rustwe wan' thewe to be a Wiggwy..."
- >"Do you awso wan' thewe to be a Wustwe? I do..."
- >Upon hearing your threatening words, Rustle's expression contorts into one of shock
- >"Was thewe evew a Wiggwy?" you ask again
- >Dead silence
- >"No... Thewe nevew was a Wiggwy..." he whispers in shame and fear
- >"Good. You wiww thank Waindancew fow dis one day" you say as you disappear through the pet door "Waindancew is awways wight"
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