We Wear Pants For A Reason

"You know what, Rainbow Dash? You're right."
>"Buck yeah I am," comes the cry from your couch.
"I can't just walk around in clothes all the time, it's far too formal and stuffy of me. I need to learn to relax."
>She pops her head over the back of your sofa, grinning.
>"Awesome. So you're gonna take those off now, right?"
"Yup."
>Your pants and shirt are unceremoniously stripped off your form and discarded over the back of a chair.
>Rainbow Dash immediately scrunches her face in annoyance.
>"Anon, stop being lewd."
"I have absolutely no idea what you're taking about."
>"Oh come on. Just because you're not wearing clothes doesn't mean you get to swing your dong around like that, it's just tacky."
"I didn't know you knew the meaning of tacky. Are you Rarity in disguise?"
>"This really isn't funny! Retract it!"
"Dash, human dicks cant do that."
>She pauses for a moment.
>"What."
"My penis is non-retractable. It's in a fixed position and doesn't move. It's just sort of always there. Dangling. At right about face height for ponies."
>You can almost hear the gears crunching in her head.
>"Okay, you've made your point. I get the whole clothing thing, now put your pants back on."
"But I feel so free like this! Look, if I move my hips right, I can make it spin!"