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I Just Got Raped [Song Parody]

Mar 5th, 2013
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  1. >Day True Friends in Equestria.
  2. >You are Anon.
  3. >One of many in fact.
  4. >You didn't know how many of you there were, new versions of you were showing up each day.
  5. >Each in their own world.
  6. >Every single one stuck there alone.
  7. >But somehow...you knew they were there.
  8. >You shared all their memories, and they in turn shared yours.
  9. >It had become your nightly routine to pour yourself a hard drink, sit on the roof, and wax philosophic with your other selves.
  10. >This world could've been nice, but you knew better, the things these p0nies were capable of.
  11. >...The things they've done to every single Anon.
  12. >You stare at your whiskey as it swirls in your glass and let the feelings of melancholy seep into you.
  13. >All the p0nies from every universe were doing their own things.
  14. >Some were at home alone.
  15. >Some were spending time with friends at the bar.
  16. >A rare few even got to sit down with their own Anon.
  17. >The girls are all sipping their cider, while every Anon has something strong enough to blur the memories even for just a few glorious moments.
  18. >As every single Anon, and every special somep0ny they belonged to, all took a sip and stared at the drinks in their hands and hooves...they looked up to bright night sky in unison.
  19. >And began to sing their tales to one another.
  20.  
  21. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dy2YWGowObc
  22.  
  23. Sometimes.
  24. >Flutters:"Oooooooh"
  25. Something awful happens in this world...
  26. >Flutters:"Aaaanon"
  27. But you don't know how to express yourself so...
  28. >Flutters:"And Flutterrape!"
  29. You just gotta scream...
  30.  
  31. (Anon trapped in basement)
  32.  
  33. I just got raaaaaaped...and it felt so bad!
  34. >Pinkie:"Felt so good..."
  35. A p0ny forced me to put my penis inside of her!
  36. I just got raaaaped...and I'll never get baaaaack...
  37. >Pinkie:"Never get back."
  38. To the not-horse-fucking ways of the paaaaast.
  39.  
  40. (Rarity at salon)
  41.  
  42. >Rarity:"Have you ever had sex? I have-it felt great!"
  43. >Rarity:"It felt so good when I did it with his penis."
  44. >Rarity:"Anon made me do it-we literally just rutted..."
  45. >Rarity:"Getting raped can make a nice man into the meanest!"
  46.  
  47. (Anon walking from Twilight's)
  48.  
  49. Never guess where I just came from-I got RAPED!
  50. Do I have to describe the feeling? She was a pest!
  51. When I was having sex man my penis felt raped...
  52. And she wrote to the princess right after she was done...
  53.  
  54. (Flutters walking through town)
  55.  
  56. >Flutters:"Oh yay! Didn't see you there-guess who I just did!?"
  57. >Flutters:"Butt sex, undressed-saw his goodies and the rest!"
  58. >Pinkie:"Was sure nice of him to let you do that thing."
  59. >Flutters:"Nice of any guy ever!"
  60. >Pinkie:Now sing!"
  61.  
  62. (Anon leaving Lyra's house)
  63.  
  64. I just got raaaaped...and it felt so bad...
  65. >Lyra:"Felt so good..."
  66. A p0ny made me put my penis inside of her!
  67. I GOTTA TELL THE WORLD!
  68.  
  69. (Girls at the bar)
  70.  
  71. >Rainbow:"To be honest I'm surprised he didn't want me to do it..."
  72. >Twilight:"Doesn't really make sense-but mare screw it!"
  73. >Flutters:"I ain't one to argue with a hot monkey thing."
  74. >Rainbow:"I could even be his wife!
  75. >Applejack:"That good?"
  76. >Rainbow:The best 30 seconds of my life!"
  77.  
  78. (Anon trapped in a barn)
  79.  
  80. I'm so bummed by that apple's ability to make me do her.
  81. 'Cuz honestly I'd rather have sex with a pile of manure.
  82. With that in mind, a soft, nice human girl's better.
  83. 'Cuz she isn't insane and she fits me to the letter.
  84.  
  85. (Twilight on her balcony)
  86.  
  87. >Twilight:"So this one's dedicated to them guys...that make us flop around on top of them!"
  88. >Twilight:"If you're near or far, whether short or tall..."
  89. >Twilight:"We wanna thank you all for lettin' us rut you!"
  90.  
  91. (Multiple worlds)
  92.  
  93. >Rainbow:"He kept lookin' at his crotch..."
  94. >Flutters:Doesn't matter had sex!"
  95. >Pinkie:"But he cried the whole time!"
  96. >Flutters:"Doesn't matter had sex!"
  97. >Rarity:"I think he might've been a racist..."
  98. >Flutters:"Doesn't matter had sex!"
  99. >Twilight:"HE PUT A BAG ON MY HEAD!"
  100. >Flutters:"STILL COUNTS!"
  101.  
  102. (Anon tied to his bed)
  103.  
  104. >Flutters:"I just had seeeeeeex...
  105. RAPE!
  106. >Flutters:"And my dreams came true!"
  107. MY FEARS CAME TRUE!
  108. >Flutters:"So if you just forced sex in the last 30 minutes then you're certified to rape with me!"
  109.  
  110. (Every Anon and P0ny sings)
  111.  
  112. >"We just had seeeeeeex"
  113. Every Anon scream!
  114. >"And it felt so good!"
  115. We all got raped!!!
  116.  
  117. A p0ny made me put my penis inside of her.
  118. WE GOTTA TELL THE WORLD!
  119. We just got raAaAped and we'll never get back...
  120. Nonono!
  121. ...to the not-horse-fucking ways of the paaaaast...
  122. .....
  123. ...
  124. .
  125. >And as they all stared up to the star filled sky, every Anon downed their drinks and promptly committed ritual seppuku.
  126.  
  127. THE END!
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