Sexnomnia Anon (nsfw)

This is just a story I wrote a LONG while back, when it struck me to do it.

>Be Anon in Equestria
>Currently, you are slumped on top of a table in Suger Cube Corner
>Your eyes are weak and bleary,
>Your green face is flat and dreary,
>As your drool drips clearly, clearly all over the candy-shop floor
>As your tired eyes attempt to slumber, you clearly see a ... tumbler?
>Is that a tumbler?
>Yes it's a tumbler-
>Bouncing across the floor
>It ROLLS towards you,
>On the Floor
>You'd give a shit about this dinosaur interruption, to your necessary induction,
>Into the soft faint dreamlands of yore
>When like some sort of ooze, a pink marshmellow shmooze,
>Out of the tumbler oozes, upon the candy shop floor
>It is pinkie Pie - nothing more.
>You'd like it to be more, so you can say you didn't get scared on your ass by a teeny tiny baby pinke pie pony, but you can't.
>Life sucks.
"Hey Nonny-non-ba-dum!"
"God dammit Pinkie!"
>With all the dignity you can, you pick yourself up off the floor.
>Which isn't that much really.
"What's wrong Nonny? You don't look so good,"
>The Pink One says, the dial for her face turning from 'I-just-became-the-blob-to-scare-the-crap-out-of-anon" to "Caring"
"Haven't been sleeping right,"
>You rub your eyes ... and then realizing you don't have eyes.
>But you can see.
>But you don't have eyes, just a green mask-thing.
>You could never figure that out.
>And now you're going in circles because you're a tired little bitch and-
>There's a sudden gasp as Pinkie apparently has a crisis
>Oh no, wait, she's gasping in shock.
"Nonny! It's important to get lots and lots of sleep! I mean, when my friend Applejack tried to go several days without sleep trying to shore up her family she nearly died!"
>Her little hoovsies are covering her mouth in shock and horror!
"Hmmrmm"
>You intelligently reply, eyelids drooping, slipping back onto your chair
"And when Scootaloo tried to go seeral days without sleep trying to avoid her nightmares, she nearly died!"
>She's moving her hooves dramatically emphasising
"Hmmrm"
>You poignantly agree, leaning your face into the tabletop
"And when I tried to stay awake when I was younger my Grammy says I was nearly abducted by Discord worshippers and sacrificed! I could have DIED!"
>She puts her hoof over her heart, and falls on the ground, playing dead.
>You'd wish she was actually dead.
>Then she'd stop talking.
>Then you might be able to catch up on being, y'know, asleep.
>You're not quite sure why, but from time to time you have trouble getting decent sleep.
>You suddenly feel very strange as your slipping conciousness takes note of an interesting concept called "Placement in time and place":
>Why were you in Sugar-Cube corner anyway?
>How did you GET to Sugar-Cube Corner?
>Are you even ALIVE!?
>[(y)/n]
>Oh, that's good.
>Your face is suddenly wrenched up, and your mouth is suddenly wrenched open, and suddenly something lucious, sweet and delicious is pumped into your mouth-hole
>Pinkie-Donk's Pancakes and Maple Syrup
>NOW you remember - you came here for breakfast.
>Maybe.
>Seems reasonable.
"Thnks Pnmfypmf"
>You slowly chew the food
> +10 to Awake points
>You have reached a new level of wakefulness: Awake
>Effects: Status lost: Asleep
>Unfortunately your claim on Dreamland was not inherited
>You look across the table at the Fairy-Floss-Made-Flesh, a look of genuine concern on her face.
"Seriously Non, what's wrong?"
>She pouts a little
>God damn Diabetees
"I honestly don't know Pinkie. I mean I go to sleep fine sometimes, but when I wake up the next day, I am positively ruined."
>Pinkie taps her hoof to her face, thoughtful
"Maybe it's because you don't sleep the right way?"
>You raise an eyebrow at her
"Ponkie Poe, I fail to see how it's possible to mess up 'sleeping'."
>You change your tone similar to a children's story teller telling a fairy tale in the most hammy, dramatic way possible
"You see, there's a mysterious blank space of time between when I go to bed and when I get up. And in that space of time -"
>You pause dramatically
"I sometimes have ... DREAMS!"
>Pinkie Pie simply giggles
"Silly, it's quite easy to mess up sleeping! Why, when I was younger, I used to have the same problem! I'd go to sleep,a nd when  I woke up, I was really tired. Then I learned it was because I was sleeping upside-down in the broom closet like a bat-pony"
>wat
"So all we need to do is figure out what you're doing wrong!"
>She bounces over to your side of the table
"You're sleeping here with me tonight Anon!"
"Wait, wait, woah!"
>You wave your hands in the negative, as Pinkie just smiles at you
"I can't just sleep here Pinkie! I mean, what about the baby cakes? They'd probably just scream and yell in the middle of the night, and then I won't get any sleep at all!"
"A poor deduction!"
>You have no idea where the Sherlock Holmes cap came from, but it's now on her head, along with a pipe that emits bubbles in her mouth.
"I never said that you'd sleep with me here, I said I'd sleep with you, most likely in your bed, far away from Sugar Cube Corner"
>She looks at you, suspiciously.
>You have no idea why.
"Pinkie, I know you - if you slept over at my place, you'd be bouncing off the walls and annoying the crap out of me"
"A-HA!"
>Pinkie points her hoof at you
"Of course! That's where the source of the problem is! It must be in your house, Sir Nonny-non of the County of Nonnynonymous! We MUST INVESTIGATE!"
>You look at her for a few seconds, gears turning.
"You just want to sleep at my place so you don't have to get woken up by the baby cakes at 4 in the morning, don't you."
>The cap disappears, and it;s like she's suddenly ages ten years as she seizes you
"I just need some slee-ee-eep!"
>Damn, she's giving Rarity a run for her money right no-
>Oh look, she's snivelling. And pouting pathetically.
>Looking at you with those big eyes of hers
>With the saddest face ever on the history of the-
"Fine. You can sleep with me."
>You say. You're too tired to argue.
>Or just register what you said.
>And the connotations thereof.
>Oh no, wait, you're not that tired.
>You look around sugar cube corner, a few ponies smirking while others look discretely away.
>And then smirk.
>God damn.
>This is nearly as bad as the 'Horse / Whorse' argument with Twilight.
>Pinke however just simply de-ages, unlatches from you, bounces onto the table top and pats you on the head.
"It's okay Nonny! Granny Pinkie Pie is one the case! I'll see you tonight!"
>And with that she toddles off
>You stand up and stretch. Already the effects of the pancake are enabling you to function, but you're still bone tired.
>But who knows, maybe Ponka Donk will be able to solve your problem.
>And if not, she should be sufficiently tired to not keep you awake.
>Everything work out right.
>right?



>LATER
>As you sit napping, your wakefulness snapping,
>as the television's lacking most things you adore
>There is a slightly rapping, an unsightly tapping,
>Upon your home's front door
>You open up the portal
>Lo, tis Pinky, nothing more.
>She has saddle bags and a rolled up sleeping bag on her back.
"Hey Pinkie"
"Hi Nonny!"
>She bounces in past you. And continues to bounce
"So, are you ready for your super-dooper-awesome-slumber party?"
>[BOUNCING INTENSIFIES]
"Pinky, you're here to help me figure out why I can't sleep, not to have a party"
>She keeps boinging
"Silly-billy, the main thng about slumber parties is 'slumbering'! It's going to be the bestest slumber party EVER!"
>You stare at the Pink Vibrating blur.
"That doesn't even make sense! How can you have a party while you're sleeping?"
>She stops boncing, seizing in mid-air
"Oh my GOODNESS Nonny! That would be like, the bestest, everest, slumberest party if you could do that! Maybe that's the problem?"
>She suddenly zooms over to you with a magnifying glass. The close orb of her eye occupies your vision.
"Maybe the problem is because you party in your sleep, and there's no-one there to party with you?"
>You roll your eyes.
"Or maybe it's because my beds too hard? Or because I can't get in a good position to sleep in? Or maybe it's because-"
>You're cut off by the Lightish-Red Mini-horse
"Stop coming up with these 'reasons' of yours. If your good-ole Pinky Pie is going to save you from nearly dying from lack of sleep, she's going to need a clear head and plenty of supplies, to FUEL her investigation!"
>She opens a saddle bag and presents the most god-damn delicious cupcake you've ever seen.
>You know you can't taste with your eyes, but by god, your eyeballs are translating the image before you into flavour.
>Before you debate with yourself about trying to taste a cupcake with your eyeball, Pinkie Pie gobbles it up.
>Dammit.
>What the hell is wrong with you?
>You can't eat a cupcake with your eyeballs.
>Damn your tired.
>You do odd jobs, and today, you were Rarity's furniture mover.
>She couldn't move her own damn furniture with her magic because 'it's just so unlady-like'.
>Fucking bitch.
>Further, she just couldn't seem to decide where everything could go, changing her mind after everything had been moved because 'The colour just doesn't suit this lounge!"
>Fucking Bitch.
>Further, nothing could ever be put right, and everything needed to be
>Ever
>Just
>So
>To the right
>because 'The light is bouncing off the mirror all wrong, and lighting up the wrong part of the room'
>So you move it
>Ever
>Just
>So
>To the left
>because 'That lamp is sooo out of place in relation to the hypotenuse of the coffee table!
>So you move it
>Ever
>Just
>So
>To the other side of the room
>Because "Gosh Anon, do you nothing about DESIGN!?"
>God-Damn Fucking Bitch.
>So now stacked on top of your current weariness, you've been completely ground down by Rarity.
>Fucking Bitch.
"Yeah I know what you mean Nonny-non - she doesn't EVER invite me to HER slumber-parties with Applejack!"
>You blink a few times. Did you say all that about Rarity loud?
"I don't know exactly why she doesn't, I mean, aren't I good enough Nonny? Am I bad at slumber parties?"
>She grabs you, pouting
>You stammer out something resembling a 'I don't know". You hope.
"I thought I wasn't! But that meanie-chicken-peeny just never invites me! So We're going to make this the Bestest slumber party ever, and make her all jealous and stuff!"
>Jesus Christ Pinkie
"Pinkie, just, no, I just want to figure out why I can't get a decent night's sleep."
"But of course Not-a-mouse! Sleep is the most important part of a slumber party! Weren't you listening to me?"
>You stare at her, gears turning
>They're not actually doing anything, they're simply turning in circles, having fallen off their axels a while ago.
>Both of you stand there, just simply staring at each other.
>Like a pair of god-damn idiots.
>Your brain decides it's had enough.
"Pinkie, I'm nackered, can we just go to bed?"
>She sighs in relief, the saddle bags simply dropping off here as she bounces into your chest.
>You don't catch her, she just sort of sticks there.
>Somehow.
"About time Non."
>You stand there, feeling the energy in your body slowly draining out through your feet, and you decide that you simply don't care right now.
>You walk up the stairs, throw open the door, and flop onto the bed.
>Pinky disconnects mid-flop, and bounces onto the bed, giggling.
>You remain, facedown, as a warm body snuggles into your side
"Good night Nonny"
>Says Pinke Pie, her face nuzzling your side
"Hrmfrfhm"
>You reply, as the darkness claims you.



---------------------------------------


>Be Pinky Pie
>You've been sooooo tired because of the baby cakes screaming in the middle of the night for milk or diaper change or because they're scared
>You absolutely adore the terrible two but you don't like them a lot when their little voices tenderly drill themselves into your ears as you're sleeping.
>But now you're in Nonny's bed.
>You were supposed to do something, but you were too tired.
>This is nice.
>Nonny smells nice.
>Nonny feels nice.
>Nonny is nice.
>Especially when he hugs you
>Like right now.
>...
>You blink your tired eyes open.
>Nonny's hugging you, his head over your shoulder.
>It's still dark, but you can see some light coming from Anon's little digital clock, shining '3:24' at you.
>It's way too early, and you're tired.
>You try to get back to sleep, but then Nonny breathes into your ear.
>It tickles a little bit.
>Then he licks it.
>That tickles a lot.
>You giggle a little bit.
>Then he nibbles on it.
>Okay, now another part of you feels funny.
>You're tired though - very tired - so you try and get Nonny's attention.
"Hey, nonny"
>He continues to nibble on your ear, one of his hands stroking your fur on your back.
"Hey. Non."
>The hand stops stroking you, and both hands grab you under your front shoulders. His lips moving down the side of your neck.
>Clearly he isn't listening.
>He kisses dwon the front of your chest, and you look down at his face.
>His eyes are closed.
>You know this because...
>...
>You KNOW his eyes are closed.
>Which means he must be asleep.
>You bap him on the head as he travels to your belly buttong.
"Hey Anon, wake up!"
>No response, although Nonny's attention to your body has been getting a response.
>A rather heavy response.
>Admittedly you've been on a dry run for a while now, what with keeping an eye not only on sugar-cube corner but also the baby cakes.
>And you've been helping out your friends a lot with their respective problems
>Except Rarity because she's a bitch.
>The main point is that you haven't had a lot of Pinky-time recently
>Apparently, Anon thinks Pinky time is half-past three in the morning, as he lightly nibbles on your belly.
>And right now, moaning as Anon works, in your tired head, you're inclined to agree with him.
>His hands are stroking your sides, back and front, lightly grabbing you flank as he moves his libs down to your sweet spot.
>You feel his breath on your hot, moist lower lips, and as his hands spreads you open, you momentarily consider whether to keep trying waking him up.
>He gives you a long lap, from anus to clit and beyond, and you decide that thinking time is over.
>He licks at your pussy, occassionally teasing your clit with the very tip of his tongue and getting some long groans out of you
>Sometimes he stops, and fingers you, feeling around inside you until he finds a sweet spot which makes you gasp suddenly in pleasure
>Right now you're really, really worked up, but he just keeps you at the very edge, not letting you go over into climax
>Every time you think you're going over, he slows his ministrations, strokes the fur on your thighs
>You don't know how long he does this for, but eventually he stops
>You look down, breathlessly, just as he unzips his now engorged cock.
>Holy Guacamole that's big!
>It slaps down ontop of your pussy, rubbing up and down, hot-dogging your tired, tortured lips
>You moan, your moistness slicking up his organ.
>He then grabs his dick with one hand, and grabs your flank with the other, and
>just
>Jams
>it
>In.
>He hilts it in one sudden movement, and you momentarily see stars as he hits deep inside you, his pubic bone grinding into your clit, his hot, throbbing member depe inside your belly.
>His teasing from before ensures that your cum almost instantly.
>Even as you milk that amazing member of his in ecstacy, he pulls out, and slams back in, grabbing your hind quarters.
>He pounds you relentlessly, his dick stretching out your inviting hole, managing to hit
>Every
>Single
>One of those spots he found earlier with his fingers.
>Soon he's milking orgasm after orgasm out of you, even as your poor pussy tries to milk him.
>He changes position, grabbing your mane and pumping into you from behind
>Occassionally he'll slap your butt and grab you, getting a groan out of you
>Eventually his grunts increase in intensity, he grabs you harder, and he speeds up, pumping into you like a jack hammer.
>You're barely hanging on as he uses you as a cock-sleeve, brutally fucking you.
>You've never been quite so roughly fucked like this before.
>And it's amazing
>Your poor little hole is sore and stretched, your neck is hurting from having your mane used as a hand-grip, and your tush hurts from the slaps and grabbing
>But it feels FANTASTIC
>You feel him coming closer to his own edge, and you can't help but squeeze him as you come close to your own
>He hilts you one last time, and roars. He pretty much explodes deep inside you, setting your own orgasm off as well.
>Then he explodes again, and again, and again. His seed fills you even as it drips down the inside of your legs.
>He simply holds you, pulling your mane as he finishes up inside you, grabbing your flank so he can keep as much of himself inside you.
>Suddenly he let's go, and you fall face first into the bed.
>He grabs you, rolls you over, and pulls you into a hug by the (yes - he's still asleep) Anon. He's got a small smile on his face and he's snoozing lightly.
>As if the absolutely amazing fucking he just gave you hadn't happened.
>The amazing, very early morning fucking.
>...
>Damn your tired.
>You look over Anon's shoulder and groan.
>The Clock reads "5:17".
>You need to get up in about five minutes in order to get to Sugar Cube Corner and start baking.
>Especiall if you need to wash off Anon.
>You look at his blissful face as he holds you.
>...
"Yeah, it was worth it"
>You say, as you extract yourself from his hug and wobble out of the room, looking for Anon's Bathroom.


-----------------------


>Be Anon
>You walk into Sugar-Cube Corner
>You feel fantastic!
>You're not quite sure where Pinky Pie went, but you woke up at 7 o'clock on the dot and felt pretty well rested.
>Although there was a questionable stain on the bed.
>And a weird taste of delicious baked goods on your lips.
>And hands.
>And you were a little sore in places.
>But apart from all these niggling inconsistencies, you feel great and well rested.
>You sit down at the table, amongst a few tables full of hungry looking ponies, and await the Pone in Pink.
>You wait.
>And Wait.
>And wait.
>Eventually, you walk over to the counter, looking for Pinky Pie.
>There's a considerable line up, but the Pink One remains no-where to be seen.
>You warily eye the door to the back room.
>The Kitchen.
>You disregard protocol and walk on through it.
>There, the cakes are busy working, looking tired and weary, but no more than Pinky Pie.
>She's asleep, half her face buried in cake batter.
>You sneak by the weary cakes (and by sneak you mean simply walk past them) and tap her on the shoulder.
>You hear her mumbling about how 'anon,y ou're soooo big"
>Whatever that means.
>You shake the Pink Pony.
>The Pink Pony Awakens and looks around, her eyes eventually landing and focusing on you.
>You're a little creeped out by her eyeballs now being on you and seperated from her head, but you feel too good to care.
"Hey Pinky Pie!"
"Hi Nonmmrgm"
"Guess what? I had a fantastic sleep last night - I don't know what you did but it really helped!"
"Hey that's alrimnfm ust helping"
>You look at the pony who has given you the best night's sleep in a solid week curling up on the kicthen counter.
>She looks shattered.
>But happy.
>Most likely because she helped you get some good sleep!
>You are Anon, and you do Odd Jobs.
>And right now, your Odd Job is help Pinky Pie and the Cakes.
>You pick up the light Pone, and carry her upstairs, and tuck her into bed, before returning downstairs to help the cakes.
>As you leave the room, you don't see her smile, and hear her mutter 'Anon'.
>But you do hear her strangled scream when the baby cakes starts crying fifteen minutes later.


END