Anon- Operators

I observed the gear bay at the people gearing up.

I placed my arms through the straps on my webbing, pulling the two ends of the belt together, clipping the buckle in place, i tightened up the ends.

My osprey body armour was next I separated the front half and back half, I put the rear half on barely balancing it so it wouldn't fall off. I then Struggled to apply the front half, i tightened it s far as i could.

Then my helmet, i stared into it for a brief second before putting it on. I pulled out my camo cream kit to look at myself in the reflection. I had to admit i had a worried face, i was out of my depth, nervous but not in bad way, more like that nervousness when loosing your virginity, You weren't scared to loose it, you're just nervous to perform.

One of the older guys walked up to me and looked me up and down. For the life of me i couldn't remember his name or who he was, he'd end up taking a bullet a week after and i never saw him again. I can't even remember what he looked like, his own helmet casting a shadow over his face, forever shrouding it in mystery, he had a cigarette hanging out of his mouth, yet to be lit.

He went to his pack and grabbed a roll of fabric tape, he lifted up and forward the plate carrier. "Hold" he said abruptly. I complied. He proceeded to tape up my right shoulder. He pulled up the Side velcro under my arms, "Lean forward and breath out fully". I again complied. He then applied it to about as tightly as i had it before. "Stand up straight," As i stood up the pressure was relieved on my chest, it felt more comfortable.

He Grabbed my blast nappy and gave it a wiggle. then grabbed my helmet with both hands and tried to wobble it side to side. "Weapon." I pulled it up, removed the mag and gave it the NSP checking it functionally, then placing the mag back in. He got up into my face and grabbed my PRR button speaking into my headset he was so close "crowbags fresh and ready to roll."

"Crowbags comms green" Someone replied.
"In future just remove your Left side, don't remove your right" I nodded in compliance.

"Is there anything else i need?". He walked away and returned back with a gold colour shemagh, placed it round my neck rolled it a couple of times and stuffed some of it under my armour.
"Water full?"
"Yes"
"Mags"
"Six full plus weapon"
He looked towards our S/Sgt our IC, and our Sgt out 2IC. One had their arms crossed and the other had their hands on their hips. They had been ready and geared up since dawn.
They Nodded in approval. He went to walk away but turned back at me and patted e on the shoulder in reassurance, then nodded in respect. He went back to his own kit.

I stood there dong nothing for a few moments just to get my head around things.

"Alright lads photo time"

They took photos of the three of us crowbags before we went out.

We formed up in a two ranked column. We were lead to a chinook waiting on a pad.

It was like the proverbial "Lamb to the slaughter", i wanted to stop and walk away but i followed. The S/sgt and sgt were talking to who i presume was the load-master. We sat down in silence. The floor felt sticky and the compartment smelt funny. That Clean, sterile smell that you get at a hospital, with just a touch of sweat and grease.the S/sgt grabbed me and the other two and led us back outside for a photo opportunity with us in front of the chinook.

We were led back inside and i took my place in the centre of the aircraft. Load-master asked us to put our hands out as he had a present for us. He started placing something in people hands. I was confused as to why a load-master would give us something, that was until it was placed in my hand. A Dark grey and white greased paper Bag.

"FIRST FOLD
BAG, AIR SICKNESS NATO STOCK No. 8105-99-130-2180
SECOND FOLD

CLOSE BY FOLDING ONCE
TOWARDS YOU, PEEL RELEASE
PAPER FROM PANEL, FOLD AGAIN
AND SECURE."

A sick bag.

I felt queasy before getting in the damn helicopter.

I observed around the fuselage.

It rumbled, shook, and vibrated, I definitely felt queasy. All the Port holes and ramp were bright and the dark unlit interior felt even darker than night.

Opposite me i had Paul and "Ads", cousins, who like me had never been in combat and been sent with recce platoon to give us our battle baptism. Paul was a quiet but professional guy, Ads on the other hand was quite chatty. They were sharing some headphones from an MP3 or I pod. they both loved music, anything, they loved noise. How they could hear anything over the chinooks engines was a wonder.

To the Right of Paul and ads sat our two resident engineers. First was L. Cpl. "Decanus-Immunes gaius decimus meridius dominus" a play on his name and role. His Middle name was Gaius, and his role in battalion was that of geotech engineer - he basically shoved rods in the ground to test it to see if tanks could roll over it. Immunes was a type of soldier in the roman imperial army who was immune from shit jobs because of his speciality. Arguably one of the smartest men in the platoon, married at 18, logical, thoughtful and methodical. Born on a farm and pretty big, but bit of a softy. He was reading a book of some sort, it had pictures of rocks on it, so i can only presume it had something to do with his job.

Peering over his shoulder was L. Cpl "Bumpy / Bumble/ Mr Bump" attached to us from the 33rd EOD regiment another engineer, but one that specialises in EOD and UXO. Not particularly smart or britght, but very genuine, can't say a bad word about him other than he was clumsy. By the look on his face he hadn't a clue over what the book was about. Gaius courteously Moved the book more in Bumps direction so he too could read.
Next to Bumpy was "Big K" our language specialist. he had a name that no one but the sgt could pronounce. His family was from the border area between Pakistan, Afghanistan and Iran. he could speak Pashto, Urdu, arabic, Farsi in addition to full Chav "blud" "English". Sgt joked he could probably learn klingon inside of a week. Quite tall, very muscular with a neatly trimmed beard and square glasses. He was one of the nicer muslims i've met. A militant shia who hated sunnis with a vengeance. He was mumbling to himself in on of his languages

Next to him sat my friend the mystery man. Asleep with his helmet over his eyes. Like i said he'd take a bullet a week later and be returned to blighty.

Next to Him was Cpl. "Floppy & flaccid" He supposedly suffered erectile dysfunction when he bought back a woman to a 10 man room and screamed in front of them. He was a heavy drinker and gambler. If his Big talk was true then he supposedly doubled his money from well placed bets. A thick cockney who women loved, shorter than most of the blokes. He reminded me of harry enfields "Loadsamoney". He was shuffling round a deck of cards.

On the Port side next to the ramp was our S/Sgt the "Terminator" - names after being a killing machine like out of the police station in the first movie. 6'9 with blonde hair and blue eyes. A bit psychopathic and tendency to be one mood or the other. the rumour mill was that Terminator had done time in the SAS, and regimental COP beforehand. A hit with the ladies but never anything long term as he was not easy for them to get on with, Bit of an odd one being s/sgt choosing to use a minimi. But i suppose you have to set an example sometimes. Maybe it was because he was a leftie.
On the opposite next to the ramp was the Sgt, "Spectre" named because he looks so pale from loosing a kidney, 6'6 and slim with Stout and rarely talks, arguably the most intelligent man on platoon, again like the S/Sgt served in the regimental COP and supposedly the SRR in northern Ireland. Best friends with terminator, he had an uncanny ability of having natural night vision, eyes like a hawk and supposedly one hell of a shot. he won a "King of the geezers" award after downing 3 pints consecutively. He Was given a commission and choice of top university but chose to slog it out with us.

next To spectre sat Ron Qaddaffi, Imagine ron jeremy and Gaddaffi had protective anal sex, got pregnant, then had 5 or so abortions... yeah. The quietest in the group, not a big hit with the ladies, awkward and alcoholic, drank whisky by the pint. He had the army diver qualification which was a bit odd to say the least.

Then Romeo, he lost his virginity aged 25 to an overweight woman whilst he was passed out, he got sloppy 5ths and an STD with it.

Then ferret, who got his name for flushing out two taliban from under a floorboard.

next to me on my left was nailer - he was caught fucking every civilian woman on base, Cleaners, cooks, you name it he fucked it. He also carried one of the sniper rifles, which he was checking the bolt of.

To my right was planter - so named after he "planted" a taliban who tried to rush his foxhole just after he displaced from it

To his right was woody - a carpenter before he joined

Then there was ace, who held the record for most kills out on a baptism - 5.

To his right was one nut nick - he lost his left nut from an IED 200m away and behind a wall

Opposite him was Panner - on more than one occasion did he pan an enemy - this is where you hit someone with a blunt, flat metal object like an entrenching tool or mess tin