Top reasons why Android is an horrible OS comparing to iOS.

THE FOLLOWING ASSUMED FOR BOTH PLATFORMS:
- No modding, no changing some deep setting. Stock devices assumed.
- No Google "how to do x on y OS". No unofficial methods/fixes.
- If I say "this feature is useless" that means "it should not be enabled by default because it mostly annoys than help"

- My S7 with Android 7.0 says: "Current version is up to date". A joke? It's 2018 and there are still S7s which have never recieved OTA updates? Some will say: it's the carrier/country/you can do it by downloading some shit on your pc/whatever reason behind it, remember, this assumes no external info.
- Why do I need both an homescreen and an app launcher? Can't I have my apps only in one place? It just makes Android a mess. For organizations, there are some things called "folders".
- Why when browsing (mainly desktop) websites I can't click links without tapping twice, I don't need it making sure for me that I clicked the correct thing, I know what I click. I'm not an idiot. This "feature" is 100% useless and bloatware.
- Why do I need multiple ways to go back to the previous screen/close app/whatever you call it? Can't all the apps have a back button on top and the home button be there just to go home? Can't we have some uniformity?
- Why do multiple devices have to do things in custom ways? In some devices the thing at the left of the home button shows more settings, on some it opens the app switcher. Make your mind up Samsung/chinese phone manufacturer.
- Why there need to be a million of phone models you can't even choose from? Why not 1-3 phones a year but 547? (Ok not strictly related to android, but the fact that it's fully open source and such lazy poor companies use that instead of their own)
- Why do multiple phones/versions have a different UI and icons? Is there something that doesn't change with every android update or with every single device? On iOS design changes are quite progressive. They happen slowly or once in a while.
- Why do I need a ton of volume options? Aren't two enough? And can't you automatically choose which one to change based on what's going on the device?
- Why is the status bar so FULL of icons I don't even know what's going on?
- Why does app uninstallation/apk installation have to be done in steps? ("Installing"/"Uninstalling" - "Permissions" - "Wait for this to finish and no you can't exit" - "Done"). On iOS -> "install" - "profit" / "hold" - 'x' - "profit".
- Why almost all apps have SO MUCH permissions? I think I know why, no user is aware of them. Why? When installing you get shown a big list and a big green button named "accept", what would a noob do? Don't read anything and click the button, if you don't click it no app anyway. On iOS app HAS TO ask for every permission ONE BY ONE in launch, and if you click "no" that thing using that permission is simply disabled, not the whole app.
- How much bloatware? On Android you got 9 apps from manufacturer, 9 apps from carrier, 9 apps from google. (Average number based on what I got personally). And you can't even uninstall them. On iOS every system app except basic ones (Phone, Safari, Settings, App Store etc) can be uninstalled, and the number of useless apps is not even big. I can only think of Home, Watch, Stocks, News, Tips, and that's it? And some of these are even useful to many people. On Android you got tons of apps you don't even know what they do. And hey, two browsers pre-installed in one device, how cool is that?
- Why does the carrier and manufacturer even have the ability to change and control their OS? Why do they choose when to push updates? Why do they put their useless apps? Why can they...
- Opening notifications from lockscreen. On Android: click - do whatever is your method to unlock. On iOS: click - profit. It took me a long time to figure this out even if that "Swipe to unlock" changed to "Swipe to open", eh, totally noticeable when your eyes are looking at the notifications? At least "click" is 100% common sense, that's what everyone would do.
- Why are Android animations (at least on 7.0) so bouncy and overloaded and how do I even describe. I gently click anywhere in lockscreen, the whole lockscreen does a bounce inwards. I start swiping through my app pages all apps have to zoom out by 0.1% causing a bouncy/annoying animation and me just moving the finger left and right looks like the icons are having a party and dancing around. On iOS: they JUST move to my finger! Plain simple! No complications! Same thing happens when scrolling in a webpage. If you do it a little bit, the page almost doesn't scroll, and that same gummy effect with the content jumping a little to the opposite direction after you're done scrolling. It's annoying! Now scroll a little more, and it goes at the end of the page! HOW do I scroll neither too much nor too little? On iOS scrolling feels natural and it goes exactly where you want it.
- Why is there a taptic feedback or clicking noise over everything I click? I am not an idiot that absolutely needs to hear a noise when you tap an icon! This OS i made for children or something?