Thread 97:Stories 61-64

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Omake!
>SA
"Cadence"
~~~~

"So I was wondering if we should go for red or green for Two's one year anniversary."

>Green sounds good, honey, she likes green.

"Thanks! I thought so as well."

>....wouldrutyousohardyou'dgocrosseyedandwonderwhenyourbirthdayis-

"What was that?"

>I said we should probably ask her too, it is for her after all.

"Oh, but I wanted it to be a surprise."

>...wouldchokeonmydamndickyou'dbeturningbluebeforeIletyouupthenthatgoddamnsuperspecialalicornimmortalitywouldbeworkingovertimewhileIdrownyouwithallI'vgotbuiltupthenyou'dfuckingknow-

"Hm? You say something?'

>I said surprises are all well and good, but it needs to be special for her too.

"I suppose you're right..."

>...ThenI'dflipyouoverbelikefineyouwanttobuilditupbabyI'llcoveryoufromhooftohornyou'llbewhiterthanCelestiainagoddamngluedisaster-

"Honey?"

>I said don't worry! I'll slip it into a conversation covertly, it'll still be a surprise.

"Oh, great! Perfect! Ohhh, I knew you'd pull through!"

>Always do!

"I'm gonna go get ready!"

>You do that, honey, be with you in a sec....thenI'dmoveontothatsweetassbelikeyeahyoukepthisfrommedidn'tyouyoudidn'twanttogiveituphuhwellguesswhatnowit'sgoingsodeepinsidemydickisgoingtostamp'propertyofshining'insideofyourdamuterusandyou'regoingtobebeggingformetoslowdownbutI'mnotstoppingtillIfuckababyright...into...

'...'

>...Hi, EIghteen.

'Hi.'

>...I was just saying-

'Oh, trust me, I heard what you said.'

>Is... is that where there's a-

'Ohhh yeah.'

>...I'll get the mop...

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Omuku!
>29
"MM"
~~~~

>I just don't understand it, marey! Every time I turn around in these confounded dreams upon mine head, tis like a dinnerbell sounded to the beast of yor! A thousand hurtful things descend upon me! I just don't understand it!

"..."

>Oh, but at least I have thine smiling face to come back to. You know, Marey, thou have been like a rock unto me for so long. Thou have steadied me in times like this... Marey, Marey I... I do not know how to say this, but I think...

"..."

>Thine smile! Thine smile vexes me so! For I would not live the life I have were it not for thee! To you I owe so much! Marey, I think with our time together...

"..."

>...does thou understand what I speak?

"..."

>...Marey? Mayor Mare?... MM?

"...Do you want to go to partyland?"

>W-what!?

"It'll be so much... FUN."

>AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

~~~~~

>GAH!... Oh phew, t'was just a....

"..."

>...How many more of these things do I have?

"Like, eighty."

>Well poopy butt.

"Sorry... COME TO PARTYLAND!"

>AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

~~~~

"This goes on for a while, you can stop now."

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>SA
"???"
'Cadence'
~~~~

>Honey? Have you seen Sombra? I'm starting to think he's hiding under the bed or something.

'No, dear!'

>I'm gonna go check under the big bed just to be sure!

'Tell me if you find any porn!'

>...why would I find porn? Who keeps porn under the bed? This makes zero sense, and I have no idea why anyone would-

Creak!

>What the fuck!?

"Hello, Shining Armor, how are you?"

>No, no fuck this, this is too damn weird.

"Trust me, it's no party time for me either. And I want you to know? I'm resentful towards you."

>Okay, what? You're... you broke into MY house, don't you put this on me!

"I might as well, you'll be putting something on me soon enough, fair's fair."

>...Okay, okay wait, no, backup, let's start from the beginning. Discord.

"The one and only!"

>You are on my bed. My big bed.

"That I am."

>And you are wearing very, VERY suggestive clothing.

"A nightmare to find it in my size! Ohhh, my fallweight is such a drag... get it?"

>I do not.

"Cigarette, drag?...Bah, too goody goody."

>And you are currently... I hesitate to use this word... you are... in a position.

"That I am. And, again, I feel the need to point out I am very irritated at you."

>...I just... this is too weird even for you.

"Look, according to everyone else this is how you get some screentime around here, and apparently me trying to stick it in you will just backfire horribly and drain what little screen presence I had right out of me! So... let's get to it! I want at least a mini!"

>...Oh... ohhhh...OHHHH... oh, oh shoot, really?

"Yes!"

>Wow, look man... uh...

"Oh, don't even pretend you won't-"

>No no! Not that part... kinda that part, but no, it's just... look, I'm not a miracle worker here.

"...huh?"

>Look, man, me with Pinkie just kept her afloat, it didn't win her an award or something, and you... well...

"..."

>...you're next to nonexistent. So, look man, I don't know how much this is going to do.

"...I... I just want at least one story starring me.... just one? Just one little story? Just one? Please? It's... it's been so long since I've been touched.... in the story."

>Ahhh... ahhh shit, that look. That look is really stinging, I want you to know.

"Please?"

>...You know what?

"What?"

>...You're getting two stories, minimum.

"R-really!?"

>Yep. Two stories, minimum, I don't care who's favors I have to cash in here. You might get more, maybe, but there will be two stories, just for you, at the absolute least.

"Really!?"

>Yep... and guess what?"

"What!?"

>Canon. No NCs or Omakes count for this.

"Oh, oh my! My heart is aflutter! My head is spinning! You'd do this for me!?"

>Just for you, buddy.

"Oh thank you! Thank you so, I take back all the times I snapped my fingers and sent you into a hellish dimension of hate to be tortured and wiped your memory!"

>...

"...which was none! Ahaha... ahah..."

>...

"Look, I made sure they didn't rape you, okay? Top mare up there said that was too much after the Chrysalis incident.... not that I would have anyway! I didn't need to be told that..."

>...

"...REWIND!"

~VR~ ~VR~ ~VR~ ~VR~ ~VR~ ~VR~

"Thank you so, Shining!"

>No problem.

"...Well?"

>Hm? Oh... well, if you're offering.

"At this point, it would simply be rude not toooOOOOO! AH! O-oh my, didn't miss at all with that OOONNEEENNNNGGGHHH!"

>Hey, Discord?

"Hnngh!?"

>Thank god for Non-canon.

"AH! At this rate IIII'm going to be flying funNEEEEE in CANON!"

>Let's put that to the test.

"AHHHH!"

'Honey? What are you doing?'

>Fucking Discord in the ass!

'...Okay! Have fun!'

"...W-wha-"

>That's codename for jacking off.

"...why would that BEEEEEENEVERMIND! NGH!"

>Like I said, non canon.

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