The best fanfiction you’ll ever lay your goddamn eyes on.

So, once upon a time in this shitshow, there lived a troll gal they called Mindfang. Now, Mindfang was one rude fucker. Always gutting people, insulting people, stealing people’s shit...the whole package. I know what you’re thinking. ‘This can’t be our protagonist, right?’ Wrong. This was the protagonist. But not to fear.

Because, once upon another time, there was a dog furry with wings. That dog furry’s name? Jack Noir. Jack Noir was the *perfect* fit for dear Mindfang.

One day, when Mindfang was busy gutting people and Jack Noir was busy stabbing people, they crossed paths. Their eyes met, and their hearts went doki doki. It was love at first sight.

“No way,” Mindfang said, but she could not deny her feelings. “What is this...this feeling?”

Jack walked over to her sexily, his clothes covered in blood like some twelve year old’s edgy fursona. He embraced her, his sexy, furry paws grabbing at her probably grey troll hips.

“Love, bitch,” he said.

As the two kissed, time stood still. Now, it was a fucking awesome kiss. We’re talking anime protagonist kiss here. Cherry blossoms fell from the sky, because atmosphere, and the sun shone through the clouds but we’re gonna pretend that the Alternian sun isn’t deadly for a sec.

A tear dripped from Mindfang’s eye, then another, and another, until eight tears in total had dropped from her heated cheeks.

As she pulled away from the kiss, she said, “this is...perfect.”

Jack Noir nodded, a single, furry tear rolling down his furry cheeks. “Yes, my love. You’re more beautiful than a thousand stabbings.”

But as he went to kiss her again, she put a hand to his sexy, furry chest. “Wait.”

“What?”

“How am I supposed to tell my friends (let’s pretend she actually has them for the sake of my fanfiction) that I’m a furry?”