Why you are unhappy

According to a study conducted by the world happiness report (WHR, 2018), sweden ranks number 7 of all countries in the ranking of happiness. Yet, the Public Health Agency of Sweden has been given the assignment of improving the overall mental ill-health of sweden (folkhälsomyndigheten, 2018). This begs the question if sweden really deserves that ranking. What is and how do you attain happiness? “...happiness, cannot be pursued; it must ensue...” Viktor Frankl said in Man’s Search for Meaning. Happiness is not something one can forcefully accomplish, it must come as a natural by-product (Frankl, 1946).

The hedonistic paradox is a philosophy proposed by Henry Sidgwick in 1874 with The Methods of Ethics. The philosopher states that trying to find materialistic happiness or indeed attempting to purposefully pursue happiness at all will inevitably lead to hedonistic disillusion. An article on The World Counts states (TWC, 2019); a hedonist is someone who calculatingly is seeking personal pleasure. Thus, the author writes, will always have to look for new sources of happiness as opposed to a long term solution as the gratification of new gadgets inexorably fades over time. Conforming with this they write, true happiness is not an achievable goal, it is merely a result.

Altruism, helping others, is according to the Mental Health Foundation (MHF, 2019) psychologically beneficial, in that parts of the brain associated with pleasure and happiness is activated through altruistically induced endorphin releases. Furthermore, altruism has been shown to reduce negative emotions, which in turn wanes depression and could even improve physical health. As Terrie Schweitzer, editor of the Better Humans website put it, “If you are feeling bad, go find someone to help.”.

Emma Seppälä writes in Embracing Hardship, a Surprising Secret to Happiness (2015), A Common approach to dealing with hardship is focusing on the negatives, heftily blowing their destructive power out of proportion and consequently exasperating non issues which causes stress and a decrease in well being. Instead, Seppälä means that by embracing these everyday challenges, tranquility will ensue as the gifts in life will determine well-being as opposed to the overshadowing negativity. Haruki Murakami famously stated "Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.".

In the same vein as the previous paragraph, Jack Schafer (Happiness Without Sadness Has No Meaning, 2016) proposes that “The height of personal happiness can only be measured by the depth of personal sadness.”. Most people live in “the middle zone” meaning they do not experience true emotional highs and lows, the author states. Why this is, Schafer writes, is because most humans limit themselves, avoiding sadness in order not to suffer. Schafer means that a serious consequence of this behaviour is shallow relationships that ultimately peters out, intentionally or unintentionally. Schafer concludes, happiness is only as good as pain is bad.

Sweden may rank high on the world's happiness index but that does not necessarily speak for the general well-being of swedes. Happiness is on an individual level, not to be pursued directly and may well be found through altruism. The embrace and exposure of pain yields greater happiness supplemented with a calmer being. Ones endurance of pain presents a reference point of sadness which will enhance happiness. As Jack Schafer said, “Sunrises are more intense after a month of gloomy skies.”