Sage Caves

[how can you say the old sonics are good with a straight face when they only have two dimensions?]

The sloth stared at the screen with a disgruntled look on her face and sighed.  "That can't be the best I've got.  Think dammit, the thread's almost over and I'm almost at a record number of you's."  She paused for a moment before her eyes widened in a rare moment of excitement and furiously mashed the backspace key.  For emphasis.  "I'm not proud of using this again in the same thread but if they keep biting I'll keep using it."

[F_P is how sonic games should've been after the disaster that was the adventure seri]

"Sage!"  An excited voice called out from directly behind the sloth.

"Ah shit!"  Sage panicked and lunged out of her chair, tripping over herself and falling to the floor.  "How many times do I have to tell you to fucking KNOCK before coming to my room?  As a matter of fact, how many times have I told not to even come here!?"

"You've told me to knock about 327 times and you've told me to not come in here...hm, just every other day since you've moved in actually."  The chipper deer answered without hesitation as she took Sage's seat at the computer.  "I've actually lost count of how many times you've told me to not come in h-"

"It was a rhetorical question!"  Sage got up in a huff and dusted herself off before she rushed back to her PC to minimize her vitroil-filled posts.  Before she spoke she backed up a little and took a long look at her intruder with narrowed eyes.  "Bump, get the hell out of my chair before I put these claws to use."

Bump tilted her head slightly and returned Sage's cold glare with a smile.  "You mean like when you were scratching yourself a few nights ago?"  The sloth's expression slowly softened as confusion began to overwhelm her.  "It was like, Monday night or something and I was coming to say good night when I heard some funny noises coming from your room."  Confusion turned to worry as the deer continued her explanation.  "Yeah, I only saw you from behind but your arm was going crazy and you were panting a lot.  Oh!  I remember you were also saying fu-er, 'freaking Bump' a lot before stretching and-"

"A-and I hit my knee on desk really hard-"

"Uh huh!"  Bump confirmed with a bouncy nod and stood up out of Sage's chair.  "I thought you were going to go into one of your rage fits so I ran away and didn't say anything about it until now."

Sage was red in the face and frowning as hard as she could at her curvy roommate.  "Yoooou..."  She hissed as Bump motioned towards her chair.

"Yes?"

Bump's naitevy and oversized night shirt had gotten to be too much for the poor sloth.  "Raaah!"  Sage tackled Bump with surprising speed  and pinned her to the floor.  She carefully eyed her prey as she ran her claw in between her often cheery roommate's breasts.  "Stupid ass boobs."  In one swift motion she flicked her claw and tore an opening in Bump's nightgown.  "Fucking...stupid ass...soft...bumps..."  Sage quit holding back and buried her face in the deer's exposed hills, caressing them with her lips as she wrapped her arms around her.

Bump had remained silent and stared in awe at what all transpired.  "S-Sage?"  Her heart raced as the sloth increased the pace of her foreplay yet she did nothing to stop it...nor did she want to.  She placed her hands on Sage's head, causing her to freeze in place, and spoke in a hushed voice.  "Wh-why didn't you say you liked me?"

"Because I don't!"  Sage pulled her head away from Bump's gentle hold and positioned herself on top of her, ensuring she had no escape.  "Who could!?  Your cooking fucking sucks, you dress like a slut, and I can't stand how you're always so happy with your constant buddy buddy bullshit and bumping into me."  She was still incredibly red in the face and it was obvious, even to Bump, that she didn't mean anything she said.

Bump quickly caught on and grinned as she readjusted herself as she looked up at Sage.  "Ooooh, I get it!  You're pretending to be a sun deer right now!"

Sage's eye twitched and she lunged downward to meet Bump eye to eye.  "It's tsundere you fucking illiterate plebian..."  She said as she looked into her friend's blue eyes.  "I hate you so much right now."

"Got it, I com-mph?!"  Bump was completely caught off guard as Sage locked lips with her.  "Mmmgm?"  She attempted to call out to her unusually active roommate but she was in her own world, eyes closed, as she continued her amorous assault.  "Mmmgm!"

"Haaaa~"  Sage pulled back for a deep breath and wiped her mouth before looking back down at Bump, whose chest heaved as she caught her own breath.  "What what what?  What do you want?"

"I...I just wanted to say I feel the same way.  ...where'd you learn to kiss like that?"
Sage responded with a silent sneer and continued having her way with Bump.  Having her feelings returned made her even more fiesty, and she subconsciously began tearing away at more of Bump's clothes.  Her tongue slipped into Bump's mouth, sending a jolt of euphoria throughout her body, causing her to hips to move on their and buck.  "Mmhmfmr..."  Sage's urges were beyond measure; in order to avoid getting bucked off she got on all fours and continued her assault.

"Ah...hah..."  Bump's eyes wavered as she raised one of her legs and positioned it between Sage's legs.  Sage immediately caught on and began to grind against it.  "S-Sage, I~"

"Sh-shut up, I'm getting there too...nngh..."

"S-Sage!"  Sage's soft voice was the tipping point for the poor deer as her entire body shivered before going limp.

"...Bump?"  Sage gently tapped the now unconscious deer's face and relented.  "Bump?"

"...mmm...new bread...zzz..."

"No.  No!  Wake up!"  Sage firmly rocked Bump's body but she was sound asleep.  "NO!  You unbelievable bitch!  How the fuck are you going to finish without me!?  Y-you weren't even doing anything you fucking lightweight!"  Her shouts were in vain as the deer continued to peacefully slumber away, yet Sage was still very aroused and on edge.  "Shit."  She said with a grunt as she dragged herself back to her computer.  "I don't even feel like ruining this thread anymore."  She rolled her eyes, lifted her shirt off, and made herself comfortable.  "Fuck it, I'm hitting the booru."  She sighed and opened several tabs and a few folders because glancing back at her exhausted partner.   "...Night, Bump."