Lᴇᴠɪꜱɴᴀᴜᴛ ☆Yesterday at 10:05 PM
just kidding I'm. anxious.
big fucking anxiety
i posted something stupid in a chat like two days ago and got banned for it and I'm still upset about it
wondering if anyone minds me venting but
thinking about how i always end up doing something stupid in the end
i really do regret it but it's already been established that they won't forgive me
AlasdairYesterday at 10:09 PM
Them be the breaks
Lᴇᴠɪꜱɴᴀᴜᴛ ☆Yesterday at 10:09 PM
I mean
it's just been years of me doing the same over and over
and I never learned because I'm so impulsive and even medication doesn't help me control it (but I'm still far worse off meds)
im just so lonely and sick of it all
never keep any groups or friends. lord knows ill get myself kicked out of here too because im too fucking outspoken about my shitty opinions I should just keep to myself
HouseFlipperNG+Yesterday at 10:11 PM
have you attempted therapy abt it at all, cause that sounds like something that could help organize thoughts and feelings around those kind of matters
Lᴇᴠɪꜱɴᴀᴜᴛ ☆Yesterday at 10:11 PM
yeah I have an appointment in 2 days
HouseFlipperNG+Yesterday at 10:11 PM
dopington
Lᴇᴠɪꜱɴᴀᴜᴛ ☆Yesterday at 10:12 PM
but we're still at introduction and stuff
need to tell her about the situation in my life in general
HouseFlipperNG+Yesterday at 10:12 PM
imo just stick with it, keep an open mind and be truthful abt everything, and try to remember those Helpful Tips N Tricks the therapist has
Lᴇᴠɪꜱɴᴀᴜᴛ ☆Yesterday at 10:13 PM
I mean
being too truthful could literally get me involuntarily hospitalized so I'll just keep some things to myself
but
i could hardly afford therapy before and was extremely hesitant because of just how much it cost
and the government decided to give me aid in the form of free therapy
after I had a crisis that ended in me being involuntarily hospitalized for three months
so thanks I guess
HouseFlipperNG+Yesterday at 10:14 PM
i mean as shitty as being involuntarily hospitalized is, and how terrible the mental health systems i nthe world are
typically if they do try to hospitalize you, it's cause of something major which they want to help with regardless
not saying it's good, but also not saying to lie to your therapist yknow
caimYesterday at 10:15 PM
hey guys, this should probably be moved to dms. this can be very upsetting for people to hear and can be incredibly personal, too.
AlasdairYesterday at 10:15 PM
Yeah, the general channel probably isn't the best place for so heavy a discussion
Lᴇᴠɪꜱɴᴀᴜᴛ ☆Yesterday at 10:15 PM
no offense but I'd rather die than go through the sheer lack of respect for my humanity they had back there again
bearysweetYesterday at 10:15 PM
this is a genchat and venting is typically not a thing that we'd allow in here, sorry!
AlasdairYesterday at 10:15 PM
Putting a stopper on this, please and thank you.
Lᴇᴠɪꜱɴᴀᴜᴛ ☆Yesterday at 10:15 PM
sory
messages didn't show up
internet crapped out for a bit
alexanswerYesterday at 10:16 PM
It's alright, please take care of yourself, but I don't want anyone getting upset!
Lᴇᴠɪꜱɴᴀᴜᴛ ☆Yesterday at 10:16 PM
can we have a venting channel or something because
I don't really have anywhere else for this stuff
sorry
caimYesterday at 10:17 PM
i don't think a cherubplay discord is maybe the best place for that kind of thing? i'm sorry you don't have anywhere else, but we as mods would have to read that, too
AlasdairYesterday at 10:17 PM
This really and truly is not the place for it, I'm sorry.
Lᴇᴠɪꜱɴᴀᴜᴛ ☆Yesterday at 10:17 PM
fucking hell
I'm frustrated about it but whatever
bearysweetYesterday at 10:18 PM
for future reference, and for everyone else in the server, let's try not to get too personal in here! it's great to be sociable and make friends, but the heavy stuff can be a little too heavy ^^;
AlasdairYesterday at 10:18 PM
Do also keep in mind that this is a large community full of people who don't know you or your troubles.
Lᴇᴠɪꜱɴᴀᴜᴛ ☆Yesterday at 10:18 PM
mmmmmm
AlasdairYesterday at 10:18 PM
It wouldn't be fair to set aside their frustration.
Lᴇᴠɪꜱɴᴀᴜᴛ ☆Yesterday at 10:20 PM
@Alasdair weird specific request but can you not say stuff like "precisely" to me? I mean I don't know what else would be like it and it's very specific but
just sets me off
AlasdairYesterday at 10:21 PM
Uh
stefanYesterday at 10:21 PM
hehe..
yes
AlasdairYesterday at 10:21 PM
Alright, I'll do my best to accommodate
Lᴇᴠɪꜱɴᴀᴜᴛ ☆Yesterday at 10:21 PM
im sorry I know it's REALLY specific but I have some things that like
set me off
I should make a list but idk where I'd put it
just some shit that triggers my temper tantrums
caimYesterday at 10:22 PM
uh, you can make a list, but please remember we're dealing with over a hundred people. have patience if people dont always remember what's on it
Lᴇᴠɪꜱɴᴀᴜᴛ ☆Yesterday at 10:23 PM
of course
Lᴇᴠɪꜱɴᴀᴜᴛ ☆Yesterday at 10:24 PM
also @caim can I request some accomodations in dms
bearysweetYesterday at 10:24 PM
it depends what those accommodations would be, but remember, we are servicing a larger server!
Lᴇᴠɪꜱɴᴀᴜᴛ ☆Yesterday at 10:24 PM
it's mod-specific
AlasdairYesterday at 10:25 PM
W.
alexanswerYesterday at 10:25 PM
@Lᴇᴠɪꜱɴᴀᴜᴛ ☆ Would you rather talk to me as admin?
Lᴇᴠɪꜱɴᴀᴜᴛ ☆Yesterday at 10:25 PM
sure
alexanswerYesterday at 10:25 PM
Alright, sweet :D
My DM's are open
caimYesterday at 10:25 PM
so are mine, that's what they're there for as a mod
so it's whoever you want!!
alexanswerYesterday at 10:25 PM
^
@Lᴇᴠɪꜱɴᴀᴜᴛ ☆ Before you DM anyone, I'm going to add you to a different channel so you can talk to us both
Lᴇᴠɪꜱɴᴀᴜᴛ ☆Yesterday at 10:28 PM
I was already typing something but okay
but I would prefer to speak just to you personally
so may i
@alexanswer .
alexanswerYesterday at 10:29 PM
Oh yes, sure
Of course
Lᴇᴠɪꜱɴᴀᴜᴛ ☆Yesterday at 10:29 PM
thank you I'll send you my message soon