jagr

oct	hello hello
21:09	Roget	greetings
21:10	Voct	okay, so your current project is Napoleon Broward's corpse, fused to an Eco-Wrecker?
21:10	Voct	is that it?
21:11	Roget	I'm going for Broward being in purgatory, but yeah thats the object
21:11		Voct nods
21:11	Voct	okay, here are some points
21:11	Voct	I'm pretty sure molasses is a lot *less* viscous than tar
21:12	Voct	use wet cement.
21:12	Roget	I shall \
21:13	Voct	why is this keter. Why can't it be Euclid.
21:13	Voct	just keep dumping wet cement on it
21:13	Voct	next
21:13	Voct	Any attempts to exhume the grave of Napoleon Bonaparte Broward are to be blocked by Foundation agents in the Florida judicial system
21:13	Voct	here's an interesting point
21:14	Voct	(leaving aside the question of whether a grave can be exhumed, or just a body)
21:14	Voct	why would they block this?
21:14	Roget	cos then they'd see the grave is empty
21:14	Roget	and that would be bad for containment
21:15	Voct	why would someone try to exhume Broward?
21:15	Voct	and here's an interesting point
21:15	Voct	what iffffff
21:15	Voct	what if the Foundation exhumed Broward already
21:15	Voct	found that he's still in the grave
21:15	Voct	there's two Browards
21:15	Voct	one who's trapped in the tar pit
21:15	Voct	one who's rotting in the grave
21:16	Roget	Hm
21:16	Roget	Interesting
21:17	Voct	also
21:17	Voct	Broward is in hell, yes?
21:17	Voct	not just purgatory
21:17	Voct	but actual hell
21:17	Roget	yeah
21:17	Roget	he definitely went to hell
21:17	Voct	what iffffff
21:17	Voct	what if the dredger is _fixing_ the environment
21:17	Voct	it's undoing all of Broward's hard work
21:18	Voct	the machine is making the swamp prettier at a rate of 100 units / day
21:18	Voct	while Broward's zombie is frantically trying to make the swamp more civilized at a rate of maybe 2 units per day
21:19	Roget	So the dredger is fixing things up while he pukes lead and flails impotently
21:19	Voct	yes
21:19	Roget	nice
21:20	Voct	..... also, the Foundation has been dumping heavily contaminated waste on the dredger
21:20	Voct	in hopes that it will fix it.
21:21	Roget	fix it?
21:21	Voct	minute
21:22	Voct	i looked at something bright and now i've got phosphenes
21:22	Voct	they make it hard to read the screen
21:22	Voct	please hold, someone will be with you shortly
21:22	Roget	kk
21:26	Voct	here's an interesting point
21:26	Voct	why has his hell been outsourced to earth?
21:26	Roget	Broward died before they invented space
21:28	Voct	space?
21:28	Voct	the point is
21:29	Voct	Giraffe Hell is an SCP in a subdimension
21:29	Voct	Ice Cream Hell is an SCP in a subdimension
21:29	Voct	why has Napoleon Broward's hell been set on Earth instead of a replicated Earth environment?
21:29	Voct	and how much longer before these damn phosphenes finally fade
21:29	Roget	2.5 kilometers
21:31	Voct	please, I'm discussing an actual health condition right now. Don't joke about it.
21:31	Roget	Sure, apologies
21:31	Voct	why has Napoleon Broward's hell been set on Earth instead of a replicated Earth environment?
21:32	Roget	I think because he spent so much of his life tearing up the earth, that he'd stay to reap what he sowed
21:33	Voct	why not Thomas Midgley, then
21:34	Roget	because I don't live in a county named after him
21:36	Voct	Thomas Midgley invented leaded gasoline *and* the use of CFCs as a refrigerant
21:36	Roget	I'm aware
21:36	Roget	he's probably in a deeper hell
21:37	Voct	there has to be a reason
21:37	Voct	I'm thinking
21:37	Voct	the environmental remediation that the dredger does
21:37	Voct	isn't permanent
21:37	Voct	and
21:38	Voct	hm
21:38	Voct	on the occasions when Dredger falls asleep, exhausted
21:38	Voct	the Dredger has spoken to the Foundation
21:38	Voct	apologizing for having to bring him up here for his punishment
21:38	Voct	they've been having budget problems
21:39	Roget	hahahahaha
21:39	Voct	"budget problems?"   "Oops, he's waking up! Shh!"
21:39	Roget	lmao
21:39	Roget	perfect
21:39	Voct	that's also why the remediation isn't permanent
21:39	Voct	it just gets fixed long enough to make Broward miserable again
21:41	Roget	So, dredger is fixing Broward's bile, and he's trying so hard and exhausing himself so the dredger is apologizing for hell having to bring him up to make room?
21:41	Voct	yeah
21:41	Voct	They don't currently have the budget to create a specific subplane of hell just for him
21:42	Voct	DNA samples from Broward-merged-with-Dredger and Broward-in-grave match
21:42	Voct	as do dental records
21:42	Voct	and damage inflicted on Broward-in-grave has appeared on Broward-merged-with-Dredger
21:43	Voct	like, if you use a laser to burn a slice in the inaminate Broward's forehead....
21:43	Voct	that slice will appear in the animate Broward's forehead
21:43	Voct	(but not vice versa)
21:44	Voct	you're familiar with Sisyphyus?
21:44	Roget	yesh
21:45	Voct	Zombie Broward has told the Foundation that as soon as he has drained and paved all the swamps in America, he will be able to rest
21:46	Voct	the Dredger works almost exactly the opposite of how he wants it to
21:50	Voct	ah, and the phosphenes have faded
21:50	Voct	you know what I mean by 'phosphene', yes?
21:55	Roget	I looked it up after you told me not to joke aboot it
22:02	Roget	hows it look now?
22:28	Voct	sorry, I was dealing with garbage
22:28	Voct	literally, things I needed to put in the recycling bin and/or garbage cans
22:28	Voct	checking
22:29	Roget	kk
22:30	Voct	why technetium?
22:30	Voct	especially since it's not something naturally found?
22:31	Roget	its crazy poisonous
22:32	Voct	I don't think Hell has the budget to produce technetium
22:34	Voct	at the hip with a dredging device (SCP-2489-2) used during his tenure as governor to drain the Everglades wetlands.
22:35	Voct	are you saying that the Foundation tracked down each and every dredging device that was used during Broward's term, found trhat there was one unaccounted for, and then concluded that it must be the animate one?
22:35	Roget	When it activated it was one of the ones that's sitting out in the everglades right now
22:36	Roget	Did you know they actually just left them out there, and those dredges are still out there to this day?
22:36	Roget	I've been to one
22:36	Roget	it's pretty cool
22:36	Voct	!
22:36	Voct	SCP-2489-1 is the re-animated corpse of Napoleon Bonaparte Broward1
22:36	Voct	no, no
22:36	Voct	SCP-2489-1 is *apparently* the animated corpse of Napoleon Bonaparte Broward
22:36	Voct	SCP-2489-1 is an animated cadaver identifying itself as Napoleon Bonaparte Broward
22:49	Voct	hello?
22:50	Voct	skip the technetium. Just use lead and mercury.
22:50	Roget	hi hi
22:50	Roget	I thought I'd responded in the affirmitive, sorry
22:57	Roget	Anything else to say about its current state?
22:58	Voct	hm
23:00	Voct	 any and all land which could be used for human habitat
23:01	Voct	 any and all *uncultivated* land, with the apparent goal of making it fit for human habitation
23:05	Voct	'BRIM BELOW OUT OF SPACE WILL REMEDY AT A POINT
23:05	Voct	how about
23:05	Voct	'APOLOGIES BRIM BELOW OUT OF SPACE WILL REMEDY AT A POINT'
23:06	Roget	do you think an interview with Broward would be good?
23:06	Voct	she hmm
23:06	Voct	sure
23:06	Voct	he'll definitely ask them if they're voters
23:07	Voct	oh, and
23:07	Voct	how would he react to being approached by someone black?
23:08	Roget	probably very dismissive to them
23:10	Voct	he'd ask to speak to a white person
23:10	Voct	he has no idea what year it is
23:10	Roget	I think the Foundation would probably plan ahead and send a white person
23:11	Voct	even if you tell him what year it is, he'll completely misunderstand you
23:12	Voct	2015? You mean 1915, obviously.
23:13	Roget	He'd probably like talking about water
23:13	Roget	since he was a river boat cap'm
23:13	Roget	and then went on to drain the glades
23:13	Roget	shit was his life