Colossal, The Eclipse King, part 1

It had been a long night of heavy drinking, and Oliver was extremely tired. He sat in front of his laptop, his fingers moving around the keyboard, desperately trying to smack down the final boss in Cup Head.
"Oh JUST FUCKING DIE! PLEASE FUCKING DIE! I'M SO CLOSE!" He screamed, the laptop heating up so fast it seemed as if it were on fire. Just when he thought all hope was lost, the game froze, Oliver thought his laptop had finally done itself in. He was about to do a hard reset when his eyes caught something moving in the background in the frozen program. It walked with a purpose, its stride filled with pride, each step brimming with confidence.
He couldn't help but be entranced by the way it moved. It glowed an leery green, its exposed muscular system a star black, and a clear and visible fire emanated from it.
"I see you." It spoke, its voice haunting, its flesh-less skull burning a brighter green. The darkness within its eye sockets hiding a presence more terrifying then its present visage. Oliver couldn't believe his eyes, at first he thought only a part of the game were frozen, and this was some kind of Easter Egg the developers had placed within the games code.
"I see you, Oliver. I see all that you have accomplished, all that you are, and all that you will become."
A text entry box appeared on the bottom of the screen, a blinking underscore enticing the man's curiosity.
'Who are you?' He wrote. His hands hovered over the enter key, not sure if he wanted to figure this out. After all, his laptop was now a tiny nuclear power plant melting down, and he did not have enough to cover the massive security deposit should things go critical. "What is the matter? Am I not what you were hoping for? An answer?" the voice creeped him out, the visage of the being still coming towards him, unimpeded by the boundaries set by the Cup Head program.
 Oliver looked at the time on his phone, it was the latest model, the IphuckedUPI, it was supposed to have all the latest and greatest features, apparently, Russia had everything to do with making it. He wondered if the phones tech had infected his computer, or if there were some YouTube related thing he hadn't considered yet. The being stood patiently, the  clear flames licking  against the surface of the smooth muscular system.
"I'm fucking waiting." the thing said, tapping his foot like Sonic did in his first game if left idle for too long.
"Well, you don't have to be a cuck about it." He muttered under his breath as he hit the enter key.
"Like that's any way to treat,  I'suk'cot, The Eclipse King!"
Oliver didn't know how to react. On the one hand, a machine was talking to him, and it was genuinely freaking him out a bit. On the other, its name was I'suk'cot.
"Well, okay th-" Before another word could be finished, I'suk jumped out of the screen, and given his small size, into Oliver's mouth.
"THIS WAS A MISTAKE!" He screamed, in an unintentionally high voice. To which Oliver laughed his fucking ass off, the massive inhalations driving I'suk deeper and deeper down the humans throat. until he splashed headfirst into his stomach acid.
"THIS FUCKING BURNS!" Were the last words I'suck screamed as his body was dissolved into flaming, greenish, meaty chunks.
 Over the next week or so, Oliver had some of the strangest dreams, he dreamed he was fighting a battle of will, that he was trapped following hte movements and health of another person. That he had become the Eclipse King himself. "Well that was kind of fucking weird." He said one morning as he logged into his twitter as ColossalisCrazy. The Internet was filled with all kinds of weirdness, Keemstar was shooting off Drama Alerts as though he were watching a bad porn filled with ads every five seconds about the dangers of denture glue and dynamite sticks. Which, in a way, seemed oddly appropriate for the Drama Alert creator.
October 20, 2017
Over time, Oliver began noticing other little things about his dreams, they were never about him, or whatever weirdness was floating through his head at the time. It was always about this kingdom of terrifying beings, made of dark rocks, barely held together by giant bolts of plasma which snapped and cracked whenever they moved.
'Welcome to my universe.' A voice echoed within his mind. 'We are not so different you and I...' The scenes often shifted to a starlit sky that was the opposite coloring of what he was used to, instead of tiny pin pricks of white starlight on a deep, dark blue canvas, Oliver witness a glaringly, almost blindingly white night sky with thousands of little dark patches.
'This... This is amazing!' He heard himself call out.
'Yes, it truly is, I am I'suk-' He couldn't help but laugh a little at the name. 'I am the Eclipse King, the night bringer, the ruler of the Uqiaerlz. What is your name?'
Oliver thought on it, he looked around the throne room, still weirded out that someone... or something, had reached out to him. 'I'm Oliver, Oliver Clay... I work at a toy shipping company, stuff for little kids, crayons, toy cars, bits and bobs... I also make videos-'
There was a pause, I'suk hushed him.
'You must wake up, I have work to do.'
With a jolt, Oliver woke up, keyboard stuck to his face. He was back in the office again.
"Late night again Ollie?" Sharon from accounting asked, "Tea? Coffee?"
He muttered grumpily to himself before quickly logging out of twitter. Apparently some idiot named Morgan made a half sassed attempt at some fan art, it was decent.
Oliver turned his attention to the days work as he usually did. The shipping company seemed more active than usual today, "Sharon, are we getting the new shipment in from Jackson and Co.?"
She nodded excitedly, "It should be arriving shortly, Ollie-"
"Please never call me that again."
"Ollie-"
"God damn it. What?" Oliver was a bit angry with her, but when she picked up a strange little action figure, he could understand the look of puzzlement on her face.
"What's that? Part of the new shipment?" He asked with some curiosity. He took the little thing from her, and sat back down at his desk. It was I'suk, it was the Eclipse King, which was rather confusing.
Did he just imagine it?
Or was there something more at stake here?
"Sharon, I'm going to take the rest of the day off, let everything go to the machine, I'll answer any questions when I get back."
"It's only ten in the morning, Ollie-"
"Sharon, I swear to fucking god, stop calling me that." Oliver stated bluntly.
"I just wanted to say that your father and I are very proud of you, for working as hard as you do?"
He paused, turned back, and gave his mom a hug. "I love you too, I've got to go."

Oliver held the figurine of I'suk in his hand while he walked down the stairs towards the shipping floor. The warehouse the shipping company was situated in was around two million square feet, with trucking, packaging, and handling being on the ground floor, and the managerial side being located in a makeshift second floor. Oliver was happy there. A chance to escape the madness of the internet, a place to relax and focus on the real problems of the world. Not what one person said or did to another person on the internet. When he reached the ground floor, he looked for the shipping and receiving lead. In this case, it was Tom, newly promoted, lovely family, a bit of a dick when he had a few too many.

"Tom, m'boy!" tom was in his early forties, thick rimmed glasses and a hearing aid were his only decorations. Oliver liked that about Tom, never the eccentric.
"How can I help you Ollie?" Oliver held back his thoughts on the nick name that his Step mother had given him.
"Do you know anything about this line of action figure?" He handed the toy over to Tom, who looked it over, searching for the serial number that was usually located either on the toys lower back or the left foot. Oliver never knew why toy companies always chose the weirdest places to put their logos or stamps.
"Ah, this would be the Eclipse King line," Tom began, "Yeah! these came out fifty years ago!"
"Fifty years ago?" Oliver asked, scratching his head in disbelief, "I wonder. Um, thank you Tom, say hi to the missus for me!"
"Anytime! Sharon's a sweet piece, isn't she?" Tom replied, somewhat causing Oliver to hasten his stride.
Oliver exited the warehouse and clambered into his Hummer Prius, it cost him a Quarters worth of paychecks but it was well worth it. He didn't know how he came across something that was both environmentally friendly and still had the balls to make people shit themselves whenever he revved the engine, but it suited his needs. He threw the figure in the back seat without a thought and drove home.

Something wasn't right, and Oliver needed to figure out what it was.
'So, where are we going?' I'suk's  whispering voice echoed in his mind.
"Well, first, I'm going home to change my pants, and then you and I, are going to have a long talk." He replied, quickly checking his twitter feed.
'Keemstar made a Drama Alert on ricegum?' I'suk asked.
"how did you-" The Eclipse King cut him off, "We are as one, you and I. Quantum Entanglement, are you familiar with the term?"
October 22, 2017
Oliver nodded, "Yes, in simple terms, it's like doing two loads of laundry, and losing two socks at the same time." He finished. Quite happy with the thought.
"Or, in more repeatable terms, it is very much like having your videos demonetized because FouseyTube is an asshole?" The Eclipse King finished his thought.
"Right, I quite forgot you were able to do that. So, I've questions for you, the first being, how does this work?"
"Fuckzoids!"
"Fuckzoi-"
Before Oliver could finish his thought, a rather large group of glowing, floating, screeching lobsters with long flowing hair splattered into the ground in front of Oliver's car.
"Well, fuckzoids indeed."
I'suk was very freaked out. "You don't understand, the Fuckzoids aren't these lobsters, their the thing these lobsters will become!"

 The largish pile of lobster parts and innards slowly began to stand itself up, the broken pieces of shell clicking and clacking against each other as they slid over the greasy surface.
"Clearly, this Fuckzoid needs to-: Oliver couldn't finish his thought as I'suk did the only thing he was capable of. The Eclipse King entered his mouth, his being dissolving into a swirling black and green mass, the breaking of bones and the general 'What the fuckedness' of the situation was not lost on Oliver, who now found himself garbed and dressed as his ColossalisCrazy persona, a pale skinned clown, with two upturned horns made of the now burning red hair. A fireman's coat digitized on his form, with silver fasteners clamped down the middle. His mouth had become stretched, from ear to ear in a manic, constant smile, filled with teeth that seemed distorted.
Colossal looked into the rear view mirror and noticed something was off.
"What the fuck is THAT!?" He stammered, looking down at his left hand. His shock came not from the physical transformation, but rather the fact that it was covering only half his body. The other half was the true form of I'suk, a being made of dark matter, with only the powerful energies of green plasma holding his form in place. His muscle groups were black, but the tendons that held them in place were a startling neon green.
"Well, fuck my LI-OH GOD I almost forgot about the Fuckzoid in front of us..." The blob of mushed up lobster-parts looked less like a man and more like a three legged giraffe with surprisingly strong balance. The neck was as thick as a tree trunk, with bits and bobs pulsing in and out. The head was a constantly reforming thing, too hideous to stare at, but somehow very difficult to look away from.
 The legs constantly wobbled, wiggled, and were in general a disgrace to legs everywhere.
"So... Tell me, I'suk, what exactly do we call ourselves?" His voice sounded different, it was as if they were speaking in unison. "Colossal, The Eclipse King."
"That straight forward? No epic sounding superhero name? Or Shadow Raver or something like that?" Colossal muttered under his breath, watching the Fuckzoid thrash about, not understanding its newly created existence. "We should kill it?" He asked, when I'suk didn't reply, he shrugged his shoulders in defeat, calmly turning off the engine, unbuckling his seat belt, rolling up the windows, getting out of the car, and locking it from the key-fob.
"Stop! You... Villain... Thing!" He called out, not sure if this was what he was meant to say, or if it was just feeling right for the moment.
'Oh, one thing, only we can see, hear, and experience what is going on.'
"What?" colossal asked in confusion.
'Yes, only we two are able to see the Fuckzoid. To everyone else, it will look like we are on mind expanderas, or drugs, or bath salts, or meth... All three actually.' I'suk explained with all the seriousness of a professor specializing in the exclusive and boring history of the evolution of the chalkboard.
"Well, that would explain why the bobby over there is staring at me. Hello! Nice weather we're having, isn't it?" The police officer waved back, stared in uncertainty before going back to writing the porches a ticket. Shortly there after, the Fuckzoid slammed its massive throbbing claw into the police officers chest, causing his back to explode outwards, showering an approaching couple in blood, organs, and shattered back bone fragments.
'You could have saved that man, and yet you let the fuckzoid kill him.' I'suks voice reprimanded Colossal.
"He... just DIED!?"
'Yes, that is generally what happens when you come into contact with a fuckzoid. Also, you tend to explode into a gory shower of viscera.'
"WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T YOU TELL ME THAT TO BEGIN WITH, IT WOULD'VE BEEN FUCKING HELPFUL TO KNOW THAT, 'Der, Oliver, you should save that guy even though only we can see the strange glob of lobsters!' THAT WOULD'VE BEEN SO FUCKING EASY!"
The Fuckzoid then proceeded to render the passing couple into a gory, gooey, bone littered mess.
'They have died. You are terrible at this, did you know that?' I'suk calmly, almost emotionless, stated.
"DO WE SHOOT ENERGY, OR PUNCH REALLY HARD? CAN WE DO ANYTHING SPECIAL!?" There was silence as the fuckzoid proceeded to murder at least twelve more people as Colossal the Eclipse King stood there talking to himself. Finally, after four hours of the Fuckzoid clearly demonstrating a severe and extreme hatred for all things not comprised of huge globs of exploded lobster bits, I'suk answered.
'We can do one thing.'
"That's very helpful, now what the fuck is it?" He asked, clearly demonstrating anger.
'You have played Cuphead?' I'suk asked.
"Yes." Colossal answered.
'We can fire energy balls by snapping our fingers.' I'suk replied.
"No fucking way! I am not-"
'Another fifty people have been murdered because you choose not to do anything about the fuckzoid. Ask yourself, do we really want to waste time arguing about pointless matters, or are we going to do something about the fuckzoid running rampant?'
Colossal knew he had a point, he knew he had to do something, anything to save people from becoming blood fountain from a Red Lobster rejected menu item. "I.... don't know how to snap my fingers." he stated quite plainly. 'Another seventy five people have clearly not survived being close friends with the fuckzoid. I know how to snap. Let me take over.'

 Colossal felt something loose from his grip of control, he couldn't understand it, it was a bit like being paralyzed in comparison. He watched as I'suk took over, spawn two extra hands and began snap fighting the fuckzoid. The blasts each snap delivered were multicolored, diverse, and acted in their own ways. The fuckzoid itself dodged left, then right, charged forward and slammed him into a nearby wall, pushing the eight hundred year old bricks in, and giving Colossal a bit of a headache. "There has got to be an easier way to-" He was interrupted by several powerful blows to the chest, each driving him deeper and deeper into the ground.
"That is ENOUGH!" He roared, grabbing a hold of one of the fuckzoids massive claws in one hand while simultaneously grabbing one of his hair horns, ripping it off, and forming a make shift battle ax with it.
"You should not have done that." The fuckzoid shouted as it raised its free hand to strike, but the due was too fast for it. I'suks hands fired a focused blast of energy while Colossal slashed its throat, causing sea foam to pour of its gaping wound. The Fuckzoid backed off, squealing like a wounded, demonetized video, and getting hit back an oncoming truck, the driver screaming up a storm as he thought he'd run over a dog.
"What the FUCK!?" The driver screamed as the transformation reverted and Oliver ran over to the driver.
"Are you okay?"
"Yeah! I'm fine, I'm just trying to figure out what I ran into!" The driver exclaimed, clearly worried over the state of the front of his truck. The fuckzoid was splattered all over the front of it, but Oliver didn't pay it any mind.
'The Battle for now is won... It will be back.' The Eclipse King said with some worry.
'I agree... We should... I should...' Oliver thought inwardly.