we are doing next hop self and between the neighbors is a direct link.
it's an OLD connection/configuration, no settings changed since we had it UP - almost 1 year - just the IOS code upgrade on ASR's yesterday....
yes, the 45 sec was the holdtime, we change it to 180 now in order to match both sides....
from 6K side:
"DIST-VSS#sh ip bgp nei 10.4.2.11
BGP neighbor is 10.4.2.11,  remote AS 65004, internal link
 Description: iBGP SDWAN connection
 Fall over configured for session
 BFD is configured. BFD peer is Down. Using BFD to detect fast fallover (single-hop).
 Member of peer-group SD_iBGP for session parameters
  BGP version 4, remote router ID 10.4.253.101
  BGP state = Established, up for 00:00:18
  Last read 00:00:18, last write 00:00:18, hold time is 180, keepalive interval is 60 seconds
  Configured hold time is 180, keepalive interval is 60 seconds
  Minimum holdtime from neighbor is 0 seconds
  Neighbor sessions:
    1 active, is not multisession capable (disabled)
  Neighbor capabilities:
    Route refresh: advertised and received(new)
    Four-octets ASN Capability: advertised and received
    Address family IPv4 Unicast: advertised and received
    Graceful Restart Capability: advertised
    Enhanced Refresh Capability: advertised and received
    Multisession Capability:
    Stateful switchover support enabled: NO for session 1
  Message statistics:
    InQ depth is 0
    OutQ depth is 0

                         Sent       Rcvd
    Opens:                  1          1
    Notifications:          0          0
    Updates:              183          0
    Keepalives:             1          2
    Route Refresh:          0          0
    Total:                187          3
  Do log neighbor state changes (via global configuration)
  Default minimum time between advertisement runs is 0 seconds

 For address family: IPv4 Unicast
  Session: 10.4.2.11
  BGP table version 2576265, neighbor version 2576265/0
  Output queue size : 0
  Index 457, Advertise bit 5
  Route-Reflector Client
  457 update-group member
  SD_iBGP peer-group member
  Inbound soft reconfiguration allowed
  NEXT_HOP is always this router for eBGP paths
  Community attribute sent to this neighbor
  Default information originate, default sent
  Inbound path policy configured
  Outbound path policy configured
  Incoming update prefix filter list is BLOCK_SD_iBGP_IN
  Outgoing update prefix filter list is BLOCK_SD_iBGP_OUT
  Route map for incoming advertisements is SD_iBGP_IN
  Route map for outgoing advertisements is SD_iBGP_OUT
  Slow-peer detection is disabled
  Slow-peer split-update-group dynamic is disabled
                                 Sent       Rcvd
  Prefix activity:               ----       ----
    Prefixes Current:            1489          0
    Prefixes Total:             17868          0
    Implicit Withdraw:          16379          0
    Explicit Withdraw:              0          0
    Used as bestpath:             n/a          0
    Used as multipath:            n/a          0
    Used as secondary:            n/a          0

                                   Outbound    Inbound
  Local Policy Denied Prefixes:    --------    -------
    Other Policies:                    5220        n/a
    Total:                             5220          0
  Number of NLRIs in the update sent: max 433, min 0
  Last detected as dynamic slow peer: never
  Dynamic slow peer recovered: never
  Refresh Epoch: 1
  Last Sent Refresh Start-of-rib: 00:00:19
  Last Sent Refresh End-of-rib: 00:00:19
  Refresh-Out took 0 seconds
  Last Received Refresh Start-of-rib: never
  Last Received Refresh End-of-rib: never
                                       Sent       Rcvd
        Refresh activity:              ----       ----
          Refresh Start-of-RIB          1          0
          Refresh End-of-RIB            1          0

  Address tracking is enabled, the RIB does have a route to 10.4.2.11
  Route to peer address reachability Up: 1; Down: 0
    Last notification 20:43:52
  Connections established 445; dropped 444
  Last reset 00:00:26, due to Active open failed
  Interface associated: (none) (peering address in same link)
  Transport(tcp) path-mtu-discovery is enabled
  Graceful-Restart is enabled, restart-time 120 seconds, stalepath-time 360 seconds
  SSO is disabled
Connection state is ESTAB, I/O status: 1, unread input bytes: 0
Mininum incoming TTL 0, Outgoing TTL 255
Local host: 10.4.2.10, Local port: 179
Foreign host: 10.4.2.11, Foreign port: 22972
Maximum output queue size: 50

Enqueued packets for retransmit: 0, input: 0  mis-ordered: 0 (0 bytes)

Event Timers (current time is 0x161DAD2064):
Timer          Starts    Wakeups            Next
Retrans            16          0             0x0
TimeWait            0          0             0x0
AckHold             3          0             0x0
SendWnd             0          0             0x0
KeepAlive           0          0             0x0
GiveUp              0          0             0x0
PmtuAger            0          0             0x0
DeadWait            0          0             0x0

iss: 2529162000  snduna: 2529185639  sndnxt: 2529185639     sndwnd:  15925
irs:   24365800  rcvnxt:   24365896  rcvwnd:      16289  delrcvwnd:     95

SRTT: 264 ms, RTTO: 545 ms, RTV: 281 ms, KRTT: 0 ms
minRTT: 0 ms, maxRTT: 300 ms, ACK hold: 200 ms
Flags: passive open, nagle, path mtu capable, gen tcbs

Datagrams (max data segment is 1468 bytes):
Rcvd: 31 (out of order: 0), with data: 3, total data bytes: 95
Sent: 27 (retransmit: 0), with data: 26, total data bytes: 23638

DIST-VSS#"
from SDWAN side:
""