Happy spaghetti place

>be a fluffy pony abuser
>also be a lone wolf
>drive with your harley through the country, living under nobody's rule
>enter state which has large fluffy pony herds causing problems
>no law protects the fluffy ponies like in every other state, but most people don't want to exterminate the fluffy pony herds
>either too lazy, or they genuinely find them cute
>until the fluffy pony herds start defecating
>then they ask for exterminators
>but they're expensive
>they demand hourly pay when having to hunt fluffy ponies
>and it takes them very long until they've hunted all the little fluffballs down
>not many can afford them
>go around helping people
>want to get rid of fluffy ponies
>but without violence
>might set bad example to children
>fluffy ponies are herding and grazing
>park your motorcycle away
>stealthily approach fluffy ponies
>when they notice you, they ask "new fwend?" "why fwuffy bwig" "give huggies?" "why new fwend no eat?"
>they are falling for your marvelous disguise

>a fluffy pony mask
>they think you're a fluffy pony too
>even although you are several times bigger than them, are standing on two hoofless legs, wear a backpack, cloths and shoes, and have no fluff on you except on your mask
>you expertly mimic their language "I is new fwuffy pone. Wanna be fwends with fwuffies!"
>voice is of course much deeper than that of fluffy ponies
>they don't care
>not difficult to fool them
>just feels stupid to talk like them
>the fluffy ponies instantly swarm you and give you welcoming "huggies fo fwend"
>they defecate and urinate around
>decide to not sit on the grass they are
>fluffy ponies resume eating the grass
>they just rip at the stalks and swallow it
>only a few choke to death
>the fluffy ponies are giving hugs to it to make it feel better
>it's useless like always
>fluffy ponies then moan for their fallen friends, soiling themselves in their filth, before forgetting all about it
>try to find out who's in charge
>should be the most respected fluffy pony
>as far as you know, this herd has bad experiences with humans
>but you have a few tricks up your sleeve

>you yell "Nuuu! Wook! Meanie Munsta! Fwuffies must cwose eyes quickwy!"
>always feel retarded when speaking fluffy-talk
>it however works
>all the fluffy ponies are dropping down on the ground, holding their front legs to their eyes, shaking in fear the moment you mentioned a monster
>none dare looking up
>take away your fluffy pony-mask and wear a Frankenstein's Monster-mask
>yell loudly in funny bestial grunts
>some of the fluffy ponies start to curiously look towards you
>they instantly defecate in fear and just stand there shaking in panic
>now all the fluffy ponies look up to you
>all are crying and soiling themselves in fear
>you wonder how often these things can empty their bowels and bladder
>must have eaten quite a long time
>"nuuuu! meanie munsta. pwease no give ouchies to fwuffy. wun. wun!" comes out from a fluffy pegasus
>that is their 'leader'
>the fluffy ponies are all running towards one direction to a close forest
>they're slow
>some are sliding on the poo or slick ground wet from all the urine that the fluffy ponies in front are spreading while running
>change your mask back to fluffy pony

>just follow them normaly
>the fluffy ponies are all 'hiding' in the forest as good as they can
>some you don't see immediately
>others are just closing their eyes
>all are exhausted
>find the 'leader' fluffy pony
>it's asking around if "fwuffies safe? meanie munsta no huwt fwuffies? fwend okay?"
>good leadership qualities, caring for the safety of the herd, you mention to yourself
>stay close to 'leader'
>"What now do? Dis no gwud pwace for fwuffies! Gotta go to bettah pwace!" you suggest to the fluffy pegasus
>"fwuffy have idea! fwuffies go to bettah pwace! no stay in bad pwace wid meanie munsta!" it presents to the assembled herd like it had thought of it on its own
>don't really care
>the fluffy ponies are now 'debatting' where they should go
>some of course propose to go to the place you were all together a few minutes ago
>squeaking like a fluffy pony, you say "Fwuffy know gwud pwace! Has many sketty fow fwuffies!"
>all listen up to you, happy when you mentioned spaghetties
>only leader-fluffy doesn't like the attention you are getting
>asks skeptically where this wonderful place is
>you say that it's deep inside the forest
>the leader fluffy pony then adresses the great fluffy herd again "fwuffy have gwud idea! go to pwace wid 'sketties! fwuffie know pwace! fwends fowwow fwuffy!"
>it gives you a sly grin, as if it had outsmarted you

>clever little attention whore for a fluffy pony
>the fluffy ponies begin their long trek towards the happy spaghetti place
>there aren't any bears, wolves or foxes nearby to dwindle their numbers
>it's relatively safe for them all
>only few die
>they ate poison mushrooms and bad berries or got stuck in thorns
>you do help those you can
>this makes the leader jealous, and it tries to outdo you by helping more fluffy ponies
>others think that this is a game, and they all start helping each another
>very good
>they then begin resting for the night
>now is the time
>sneak away easily
>go towards the place they will be heading
>it's a river with a strong current
>only goes up to your hips
>take out small pot and prepare spaghetti
>start boiling it with your expert wilderness survival skills
>spread the odor of the sauce towards the fluffy ponies
>hear them wake up and come all towards your direction
>hear them all say "sketties" "fwuffy smew 'sketty" "wan food"
>they are nearing through the bushes
>you walk over to the other side of the river
>dump the spaghetti on the ground
>now go hide nearby
>fluffy ponies are all entering your sight
>they see the spaghetti
>predictably run towards it, all jumping into the river

>the moment they realize that they are immersed in water and can't touch the ground, they start to panic and scream for help
>they flail with their stubby little arms
>many hit each another unconscious
>they drown while being washed away
>their corpses will feed hungry bears and fish downstream
>mother nature wins another round against the fluffy ponies
>job well done, you congratulate to yourself
>then see that something is coming out from the bushes
>it's the 'leader' fluffy pony
>it must have overslept
>didn't expect this
>it's asking "whew aww gone? whew fwends of fwuffy?"
>doesn't see you in the dark, but can smell the spaghetti
>runs towards the stream
>falls inside
>it struggles for help and tries to scream impotently as the others did, but gulps down water

>you ponder for a moment
>decide otherwise
>save fluffy pony before it drowns
>dump it towards the spaghetti
>it pukes out the water it swallowed, and then immediately gulps down the spaghetti in front of it
>fluffy ponies don't care about the fate of their friends in front of the almighty spaghetti
>only after it finishes does it even notice you
>starts shivering
>"who hooman? you no make ouchies to fwuffy pwease! no wanna get ouchies", it squeals
>"I'm your Guardian Angel, little fluffball. And now you owe me one!" you grin
>you ride towards the sunset with your harley davidson
>feels good to have helped other people in need
>you look extremely cool with your shades and the toothpick in your mouth
>you're a bad mofo after all
>fluffy pony ex-leader is chained in front of your machine's frontlight
>"nuuuuuuuu wiiiiiiiiiiike diiiiiiiiiisss gaaaaaaaammmmme!", it screams pathetically
>tapped its butt and its pee hole so that it won't smear on your harley
>now you aren't a lonely badass anymore