The light went off in the room above her, and Cecilia promptly jumped out of her bed. Her eyes had long adjusted to the dark, and her ceiling's faint contours had become boring the first year she had moved to Tighe's house--much less now.

While the walls were indeed thick, it was still prudent she felt, to take a quieter approach to her closet than she would otherwise. Slowly over the carpet, not a creak to alert Tighe, she opened the door and beheld her row of shirts. She couldn't quite see the differences, but she remembered that it was... somewhere around...

Her hand closed around the silky smoothness that told her she had guessed correctly. Pulling the swimsuit around the rest of the shirts, she tugged a little and it finally came away from its coat hanger. She slid it past the coat hangers and over the shirts until it came out of the closet.

She could almost make out its pool-blue color in the darkness.

A small smile of contentment crept onto her lips as she sprung across the room to her bed. She adjusted the covers to lay them flat and laid the swimsuit over the matress-wall thing. She never knew what it was called... headboard! That's what it was!

She rolled her eyes--maybe she really was too tired to be doing something like this, if she was going to start making slips like that.

Without a moment to lose, Cecilia jumped off the bed and went out into the hall. The bathroom was past all the bedrooms, and so that meant she would have to go past Tighe. Not that it mattered, she was just going to the bathroom as far as he was concerned.

The door still didn't creak, though only because Cecilia applied a specific amount of upward pressure to keep the door hinges from squeaking against the unoiled bottom halves of the hinges. She went through the door, leaving the door open. Her pajama bottoms were tossed into the corner of the room, as was her underwear.

Squatting over the toilet, her feet on top of the seat, she felt her throat close up as she squeezed out her first shit. There was a plopping sound, and water splashed up on to her heels. A second, then a third--it took 5 minutes total to stop, since she had been saving up for this for a full day. With her insides emptied, she walked over to the cabinet and reached under to grab a snorkel.

She walked back to the kitchen, the door left open, the poop left unflushed. From there, she grabbed a knife from the cabinet and finally made her way back to her humble abode. The swimsuit was waiting for her, and that evil grin of hers sprung back into its place.

Humming a little tune under her breath, she went inside.

She began the deed by slicing her finger a little with the knife. She held it out as she went to the swimsuit, and began to smear the blood in a cross shape on it. Had to make it look like something out of a horror movie, right? Who would pass up that kind of opportunity.

But, she thought, it would be ruined as soon as...

She pulled it off the headboard and threw it on the ground, blood-soaked face up. Then, changing her focus, she began to smear the blood on the snorkel tube's breather thing. She gave the snorkel to the bloody hand, and with her new free hand, extended a single finger and sent it down into her nether regions. It came away with a dollop of shit, and on it went to the nozzle. Gazing down at the smear, she hawked up a loogie and added that to the mix.

Was there anything else?

...No she couldn't think of anything else, unless she could start crying or something. Maybe next time?

She placed the snorkle on top of the bed, careful to keep the lenses face down.

Finally she turned her attention back to the swimsuit.

Not a moment to waste.

She guided her finger back into her ass, and came back with another chunk of shit. Just as she was about to drop the shit onto the swimsuit--

A sudden feeling of utter disgust hit her like a wave crashing down with all its weight on her. She gagged and coughed at the same time, but still managed to fling the shit away from the swimsuit just before it dropped.

"THIS IS GOOD. WE ARE GLAD THAT YOU DECIDED TO STOP SUCH UNILATERALLY NET-NEGATIVE ACTIONS." The voice boomed from all around her. Blue light streaked the air and fixed the world in place with its placement--like a giant cage made out of frozen lightening. At the ceiling, there sat a blue eye, resting on her small form.

"AND NOW THAT YOU HAVE TAKEN YOUR FILTHY HAND AWAY FROM THE [object of divinity] WE SHALL REMOVE IT FROM YOUR CLUTCHES, IF YOU DON'T MIND."

Cecilia was struck dumb, she couln't really think of anything to say to this dude. The dude who was an eyeball. The fact that there were eyeballs on the ceiling in the first place was freaking her out.

"Wha--" She started.

"YES. 'WHA', WE SHALL ALLOW YOU SUCH SIMPLE FOLLIES BEFORE YOUR DAY IS AT AN END. COME NOW, LET US DISCUSS THIS SITUATION OF YOURS." The thing kept on talking.

Numbly, Cecilia rose from her position on the ground. She hesitently made a move forward, and when the eyeball didn't attack her, she lept onto the bed, directly under the eye.

"OKAY, SO, YES. WE ARE ONE OF THE GREATS, ONE OF THE OLDEST OF THE OLD, TIME-TRAVELLING, UNIVERSE-BOGGLING. WE, AMONG ALL THE PUREST PURES, HAVE A RIGHT TO BE CALLED THE FIRST OF THE AESTHETIC. YOU MAY SUMMARIZE FROM MY SELF-DESCRIPTION, THAT I AM HERE TO ANSEWR YOUR QUESTIONS. THAT IS REALLY COOL RIGHT? OF ME?"

She didn't respond.

"CECILIA. EARTH TO FUCKING CECILIA. YOU ARE UNDER A FUCKING REST FOR BEING FUNGUSED. IF WE WERE IN OUR NORMAL BODIES, WE WOULD FUCKING HIT YOU OVER THE HEAD WITH A CABBAGE." It said.

"What?" Incredulous, as though it had been Tighe talking and not some entity of vast power, "That sounds retarded."

There was a long moment of silence where the two of them stared at each other.

Cecilia had noticed what she had just said and was covering her mouth as though to stave off any more impending threats to her continued existence.

"WELL. WE SEE YOU HAVEN'T CHANGED THAT MUCH." It said in its multifaceted voice. "GOOD JOB. NOW, GIVEN WHAT YOU KNOW, GUESS WHAT MY NAME IS."

There was only so much she could tolerate. SHe didn't really know what the fuck she was going to do in the first place, so might as well pay this game, huh?

"Okay..." She said, "Are you, like, Tighe, or something? In a costume?"

"HALF."

"...huh?"

"You got it half right." The voice was much quieter. "Who is the second person you're talking to?"

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah?" Cecilia violently sat up. ""