A NIGGER RANT: TLDR EDITION

A NIGGER RANT: TLDR EDITION

FULL EDITION: pastebin / ghostbin

CONTEXT: NIGGER JOINS A GROUP I HAD CLAIMED ( #GRIMZSEC ) AND AFTER SOME TALKING SHE NEEDS TO RANT BECAUSE SHE CANT RANT TO ANYONE ELSE KEK

PROOFS ITS REAL: https://i.sli.mg/Je3rLL.png / https://i.sli.mg/y0pfCY.png / https://i.sli.mg/YKOikK.png / https://i.sli.mg/6QxqDL.png / https://i.sli.mg/9Q2PgW.jpg  / https://i.sli.mg/Zcr2Iz.jpg / https://i.sli.mg/gPSEJn.jpg / https://vid.me/MJRD


I'm going to rant to you because I'm not allowed to show the people who care about me weakness
So josh was my owner and we were really really close
But he is so so busy and he's kind of a manwhore like tons of girls like him
And one day he said he was sorry for being so busy and that if he had time he would call me that night
So i stayed up until 6am
Waiting
Come to find out he had called two other people and didn't either bother to message m3
And i had come in contact with one of his frienemeies who said that he was using me and if he said he cared about me he was saying just to use me
I didn't want to believe his friend because i was already deep in love with him
But then after waking up after my less than an hour sleep because of waiting for him to see him flirting with two girls
I told him it was better if we parted   because in the beginning he said "but the difference is when it ends no one gets hurt" and i didn't think that would be true now
Then he said that i didn't do that with moody
I said that i should have
Then he said he had been busy and that he was just in the call and passed out
I said he still could have added me or at least sent me a text message
He said he didn't really think of it
But i forgave him and in my mind we were still together however
He thought we weren't
And then Taylor came along
I'm skipping irrelevant parts
And they were like so bluntly saying shit right in front of me i literally thought he really doesn't give a shit
But i just tried my hardest to ignore it because
And him and someone told me to try and breakup my crush after i said he had a gf though he didn't know i meant him because he thought we weren't together i thought we were
And he asked me to tell him about it and i got triggered because the night before i had been cutting and crying because in my mind he was cheating right in front of me
I told him he didn't have the right to even be speaking to me as far as i was concerned
And he was confused and said why and i got pissed off and was yelling at him and then he said he thought we were still together and then i realized that everything had been fucked up by a misunderstanding
And then i decided to take his advice and break up him and his gf
And so i made her think he was a jackass by manipulating her she literally thought everything i said was true and i was her best friend
However what i said was so extreme she showed him
And then he got PISSED
And  you know about partial leak
I'll go find messages
"I have seen a lot of broken hearts from his girls"
"We have been friends a long time LOL"
"He's really good with his words just don't get in to deep for your sake"
"I mean in unbroken Guardians we help people even people with broken hearts so when the time comes feel free to talk to me we helped 7 of his girls who were suicidal after feel better so don't think your life is over without him"
Etc
It worked
You know about the skype thing after (LINKS: )
During which i was literally begging him on skype
Then after everything was said in done and a bit more talking and crying he felt bad
And then he made me feel guilty
Then i ended up in a group call
And i asked what everything meant
He said he didn't know
A bit deeper in he said that he had loved me he said it in past tense  then i said i love you   present tense  he said dou
[LINK: https://i.sli.mg/mE9WbP.png ]
Then later he said "wtf was I saying an hour agi"
The next day he was arrested
And i was worried because he wasn't on and i didn't know he had been arrested
The friendenemy  nick
Tells me he thinks he was arrested and i get scared because he has broken a lot of laws
And then the next day nick confirms that josh was arrested
Yesterday
And i spend both days sad and crying about josh
Then today nick gives me his phone number saying he's back
And i get so excited and happy and i call it
And it turns out its his landline
Police took every device that could access the Internet
So that's the only way he can talk now
And then i called him a few times
Then i called right before i started ranting to you guys
And i said we never finished talking about what happened
And so i tell him that he said he loved me
He said he was drunk
I said that studies show your true feelings come out when your drunk
He said some about a keg or whatever
And basically said he was fucked up and didn't mean it
And didn't love me
He said i had some how made him feel bad about the partial leak but now that he is thinking straight i should be lucky that he is still talking to me
Then there was 4 minutes of silence because i was crying and didn't know what to sayAnd then eventually he asked about the rest of it and i said it didn't matter and wasn't important  (I mean what he said was kinda like stabbing me in the heart with me living feeling every bit of the pain) then he said to tell him anyways and i said it didn't fucking matter anymore
And he said ok then
And hung up
Then i started crying
And then i said the gun thing
Then removed everything from instagram like his last name
The i changed my skype status
Then changed my name and picture
All the while i had and have i hate you i love you on repeat
Then we get to the part where i tell you guys
And this whole time i want to call him back
But i called him Nico2.0 and
So many times
And i don't need to experience that again
I miss the days where he said my kitten was doxed
And said my kitten's name was Aries(then his own last name)
And called me kitten (his own last name)
And where he would say "You're doxed kid"
And I'd mimic him
And when we would be on the phone for 7 hours
And i really want to call him back but
:(
And i love him so much
And he is slowly killing me
And
I told him
So many times
"I feel like you'll be the thing to finally break and destroy me"
Skype  status
[LINK: https://i.sli.mg/zjXqEs.png]
On repeat [LINK: https://i.sli.mg/bKejIB.png]
My name was supposed to [  https://i.sli.mg/ZEjk5Y.png]
Quote from song
We have a case of alcohol that is untouched because my dad doesn't drink
And i want to get a bottle and drink it then call him and yell at him
Him as in josh
But if i got caught drinking
My dad would kick me out
But at the same time
I won't be able to say all i want to say to josh unless I'm drunk
I wrote a bunch of song parts about him in the two days i thought he was gone
I need him:(
</3
I can't even tell my kik friends because I'm supposed to be Unbroken Guardians leader
I'm supposed to be unbroken and unbreakable
But I'm so fucking weak
I can't tell my real  life friends
Because i don't trust them enough to give them a way to hurt me
Even my best friend
I can't tell my family because they never listen to me
They always say they don't care 3 words in
My kitten isn't here anymore
I'm always fucking alone
I always end up talking to myself
Because I'm the only person who listens
That's how i developed that issue of talking to myself
Josh made me feel whole again like he made me so happy
He made me get over nico
He made everything bad go away in my eyes
There was no pain just him
He was like a hero in my eyes
And now he is hurting me more
Psychos aren't born they're made
Well.my type at least
As is the thing that causes me to obsessed and not want to let go
It is made
I was not born like this
I was a normal girl who spent her time flirting and hanging out with friends in real life only
Until i was
What 11
Around there
Because i didn't want to be alone
And that was a good way to make people stay
Until my life went to shit
And i wasn't allowed to interact with humans in real life
For four fucking months
And all i had were the people on kik
I was never able to get out of my phone everything people around me said seemed immature and stupid
I wasn't the same anymore then i got deeper and deeper and it got worse and worse
And then people like dexter
Nico
Conner
Etc
Gave me more issues
Asher
Josh
Everyone
I feel worse for my brothers though
But instead of happening in elementary for them it happened in highschool
FUCK IT
I'm calling josh
I need him
FUCK
Kill me😢😭
😢
WTF
HE CALLED ME SAY HEY I SAID HI
THE HE HUNG UP
HE'S TOYING WITH ME AND I DON'T LIKE IT
AHHJ

----TWO HOURS LATER----

:|
[VIDEO OF HER SINGING: http://paste.click/AfRvJl.mp4 ]
I messed up on the words:'(
I made the lyrics though kinda tweaked it and winged it
I said parts really weird
Also part of the ending first part
Then the transition
I think i meant so come on don't you leave me now
I think i got my words right this time  :^)
[ANOTHER FUCKING VIDEO OF HER SINGING: http://paste.click/qNzxQB.mp4]
B)