farewell

it's nothing personal, I just feel the FC/server has sort of strayed from what made it great when I first joined. Not that i could easily articulate this,  but I feel back then there was more comaraderie and a sense of togetherness and honesty..  now it just feels like management trying to cover up as much ugliness as possible with not-so-smart ways of addressing it. the witchhunt of Ishi Banha (read my thoughts here: https://pastebin.com/MgkYvj37) a few weeks ago and just recently the other night with Sinokal and Sybil/Valmont are fresh examples on my mind. and this has been a long time coming; ever since the banishment of Enny and many of her friends. i've been told by many people that they're afraid of entering VC for fear of their personality clashing with someone elses's or something innocuous they say upsetting someone... and as a result the interactivity of this server is almost non-existent. no longer do I see 9+ people in social VC, or even 4+..  or even any. the hard-pushed transition towards a raid-centric server contributed to that as well I'm fairly sure. I agree that the FC itself hosts plenty of events and incentives to participate as an FC (which in all fairness seems a gimmick to keep people from leaving), but on the server side..  it's been feeling plenty lifeless and without its original charm, as it was the server itself i was hugely attracted to. Because of this it's been hard to really integrate myself with everyone recently and I find it difficult to be as hands-on as I was before I went to Cactuar.

if anything i think this huge push to protecting people's feelings and stoking their paranoia with constant @'s about trolls or coming to management if someone upsets them over this and that..  yeah, makes it a very wary environment when it comes to sharing and expressing yourself with others, knowing you might be removed from the server if you upset a regular or have yourself put through the grinder based on one person's suspicion. while i'm confident i'd never be subjected to any of those situations, it upsets me that I know people who have or that it's happened more than once. I suppose a good way to describe is that there is no longer any desire to build bridges but rather to erect walls to protect oneself. How management treats and speaks to people when they believe no one is watching (lots of visual/audio evidence) troubles me to the core, and this ugly truth I had to accept cements my decision to part ways with this community as I no longer feel confident in some of the people who facilitate it. It seems that anyone who does not kowtow management's arbitrary line is toxic, when instead I feel the actions and words of management itself is fostering this toxicity.

i realize this is purely my own opinion as an outside viewer, but I feel it has merit given how many people Ive talked to that seem to mirror it, some still in the server, others not, some even members of the current mod/admin team (who I will of course not name). I understand that some will disagree with my views on this, and it's okay, but it is what it is and it sucks that I feel this way. I wish you all luck with the server. I hope i can again find another community as great as I think this was when I first joined, but just imagining that seems a daunting task unfortunately. Good bye.

Fenric