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- Bottled Water - A bottle of clear mountain spring water.
- Gelatin - Instant fruit-flavored gelatin mix. Just add hot water, stir, and set in the fridge. You can even use cookie cutters to make fun shapes*! *Cookie cutters not included.
- Inflatable Pool - A blue rubber swimming pool. Too bad it doesn't come with an air pump to inflate it with.
- Glove Me Daddy - A box of fifty lubricated condoms in randomized colors and flavors. If you want to get ecstatic, use a prophylactic!
- Tea - A tin full of loose leaf tea leaves. The smell reminds you of home.
- Space Lube - A tube helpfully labeled Space Lube. The tube is as big as a full-grown man and weighs about 90 lbs
- Beat Up Cat Plush - A black stuffed cat that's seen far better days. Looks both ugly and disturbing.
- Body Pillow - A long rectangular pillow, perfect for hugging at night. Can even be a substitute boyfriend, if you need one.
- Personal Lubricant - A small bottle of some kind of slick gel. It tastes like sour apple.
- Playing Cards - A deck of playing cards. It has a sticker like it's from a casino, but it's not any casino on Earth.
- Blanket - A very large, very soft blanket. It looks like wool, but it feels like being wrapped in a big warm cloud.
- Pucker Up Buttercup - A cute plushie of the...Epstein-Barr virus?
- Body Pillow - A long rectangular pillow, perfect for hugging at night. Can even be a substitute boyfriend, if you need one.
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