William D.: rolling 4d6k3
(
1
+
4
+
6
+
4
)
= 14
rolling 4d6k3
(
4
+
5
+
2
+
1
)
= 11
rolling 4d6k3
(
4
+
6
+
1
+
1
)
= 11
rolling 4d6k3
(
3
+
2
+
4
+
4
)
= 11
rolling 4d6k3
(
2
+
1
+
6
+
6
)
= 14
rolling 4d6k3
(
6
+
6
+
5
+
5
)
= 17
Lyei H.: rolling 4d6k3
(
5
+
3
+
1
+
1
)
= 9
rolling 4d6k3
(
6
+
3
+
5
+
3
)
= 14
rolling 4d6k3
(
1
+
5
+
3
+
2
)
= 10
rolling 4d6k3
(
1
+
4
+
3
+
3
)
= 10
rolling 4d6k3
(
6
+
1
+
4
+
2
)
= 12
rolling 4d6k3
(
3
+
1
+
5
+
1
)
= 9
Lyei H.: Well that sucks
Tyler K. (GM): You can reroll once if you want
But you have to accept the other roll
Lyei H.: Reroll all of them?
Tyler K. (GM): Sure
Its roll 4 keep 3
Lyei H.: And you need to make another char sheet
Tyler K. (GM): You can rename the characters to their actual names
But yeah, you can reroll every stat once, you have to accept the reroll though
type in /r 4d6k3 for each stat
rolling 4d6k3
(
1
+
3
+
1
+
1
)
= 5
for instance
Lyei H.: I think I'm going to try my luck on a reroll
rolling 4d6k3
(
1
+
1
+
3
+
2
)
= 6
rolling 4d6k3
(
2
+
3
+
4
+
1
)
= 9
rolling 4d6k3
(
4
+
4
+
3
+
5
)
= 13
rolling 4d6k3
(
5
+
4
+
4
+
3
)
= 13
rolling 4d6k3
(
5
+
3
+
4
+
3
)
= 12
Lyei H.: rolling 4d6k3
(
6
+
2
+
2
+
4
)
= 12
Tyler K. (GM): If you REALLY want to reroll that 6, I can turn a blind eye
Personally I think low stats are good for RP purposes
Like one or two
But thats just my opinion
Lyei H.: And I'm purposely giving myself low Cha for RP purposes, but that 6...
rolling 4d6k3
(
3
+
4
+
4
+
2
)
= 11
Eh, the 6 fits better.
Tyler K. (GM): Sounds good
I made a 4 dex character once
He was a crippled summoner
His eidolon helped him as a sort of bodyguard/living assistant
Lyei H.: Tiefling gives me +2 Cha anyways
Tyler K. (GM): Kori, I understand that you're pretty new to Tabletop, no?
kori s.: Pretty much
Like newborn infant new.
Tyler K. (GM): Cool, do you need a link to the books?
kori s.: rolling 4d6 + 3
(
2
+
5
+
6
+
6
)+3
= 22
Tyler K. (GM): its 4d6k3
kori s.: rolling 1d6
(
2
)
= 2
Lyei H.: That first one was a good roll though
Tyler K. (GM): It reads as roll 4d6, keep 3 of them
kori s.: rolling 4d6
(
5
+
4
+
3
+
3
)
= 15
rolling 4d6
(
1
+
5
+
1
+
6
)
= 13
rolling 4d6
(
4
+
2
+
2
+
3
)
= 11
rolling 4d6
(
6
+
2
+
3
+
3
)
= 14
Tyler K. (GM): you can do it automatically too
Lyei H.: Oh well
Tyler K. (GM): .r 4d6k3
slash instead of r
.*
kori s.: We do 6 times right?
Tyler K. (GM): slash instead of .
Yeah, one for each stat
You can allocate how you want
Do you need the books?
Lyei H.: I can get him a book too, and I have a website I linked him with most of the stuff
Tyler K. (GM): k
kori s.: rolling 4d6
(
5
+
4
+
6
+
6
)
= 21
rolling 4d6
(
1
+
5
+
4
+
2
)
= 12
Lyei H.: You did one extra theree
Tyler K. (GM): Ignore the last one
So you have a 15,11,9,12,12
Lyei H.: The first one was a 17 though
Tyler K. (GM): First one didn't count
So keep that last one
Lyei H.: Well okay then
Tyler K. (GM): 15,12,12,11,11,9
Allocate accordingly
Lyei H.: 12, 12, 9, 12, 17, 11
Tyler K. (GM): ?
oh
Yeah, my b
Sorry, used to just having it done auto
William D.:
kori s.: Ok I have a idea of where I want my stuff.
Tyler K. (GM): 12 12 9 12 17 11
Lyei H.: You can edit your own sheet, and you might want to pick race/class first
William D.: what is acrobatics good for, I'm bouncing between it and slight of hand
Tyler K. (GM): Any skill that requires stuff like balance or coordination
skill check
Its like body coordination
William D.: Yeah I understand the concept, I guess I was just looking for a push one direction or the other
Tyler K. (GM): Whatever you feel fits the character better
William D.: think I'll stick with acrobatics, I like the idea of my character being springy
Tyler K. (GM): So I know willy wants to be a sorc, Lyei is playing a cleric, what are you playing Kori?
kori s.:
ignore that
William D.: committed to memory
Lyei H.:
Cool
Also, out of curiosity, what will be using for deities in this game, if any?
Tyler K. (GM): Probably FR deities, not going to be sticking too hard to it
William D.: fr?
Tyler K. (GM): Forgotten Realms
William D.: ok
Tyler K. (GM): Hey Sasha
You can rename your char to whatever you want, just tried to make it easier to find at first
4d6k4
4d6k3*
Roll 4d6 and keep the 3 highest
Sasha: dam I should have asked first
Tyler K. (GM): Is it going to be an issue?
If you already rolled your char its no big d
Sasha: no i haven't
the truth is rolling for ability scores is absolutely barbaric
*random generation
Tyler K. (GM): If you really want to point buy i'll allow it, but I do allow you to reroll once if you don't like the score
Sasha: well I do appreciate getting the option to choose.
Tyler K. (GM): Though you do have to accept the reroll
(and as an aside I think random gen ability scores lead to better RP, but thats just personal opinion)
Whatever you want to do
Sasha: I have to go afk, but when i'm back we can rant about my hot opinions
Tyler K. (GM): Sall good
Sasha: hey
I'm back
Tyler K. (GM): I'm here
Was showering
Sasha: So about ability scores
so rolling for ability scores is a gygaxian hold over, and it does have a place. It was created when dnd was a board game that shipped with a single dungeon. It was played like a "rogue like" where it was expected each week people would try to beat the exact same dungeon over and over again rolling up brand new characters each time. (that is the context where I see it's appropriate use being justified)
Like many Rpg tropes that are seen in every system, it has been perpetuated through nostalgia and tradition now being a staple.
Tyler K. (GM): I'd argue that it keeps characters from feeling samey in a mechanical context and curtails power gaming
A player is never going to intentionally give their character weeknesses
Which is what good characters hinge upon
I think allocatable random gen scores are a good balance
Its not like its 3d6 straight down
Its 4d6k3 and you can reroll once if you're unhappy with the result
Tyler K. (GM): I would try it once, just to see if you like it, and if you're not happy, you can do pointbuy
Sasha: I would feel it be unfair if rolled for stats and kept them only because they are very good.
I would take point buy if it did.
Tyler K. (GM): I just really don't like point buy because it results in really mediocre characters that are boring from a mechanical and RP standpoint
Sasha: (this is entire debate is because personally I like banter and find it fun.)
Tyler K. (GM): The reroll is in case of a really bad stat
Sasha: "the Argument that any one or another generation system creates better roleplaying is fallacious. I've seen bad RP practices from abusing random characters, by a player comiting sucide untile he got a good roll. That is entirely dependent on the players acting skills. Further I don't see it fixing system problems, or preventing power gaming given that is based on class and feat selection, enabling strong classes that depend on a single stat while punishing the weak multi dependent classes. It creates imbalance between both the players and content, in the most straight froward sense by giving arbitrary distribution. Players giving them selves intetional weakness would have to be part of the system for people to do it (like traits&Flaws), classes have fixed archetypes for balance."
Tyler K. (GM): Oh we're not using feats
Btw
Sasha: ( I can rolll up a character but I would not want to play it long term, and would dump it after the adventure path.)
>no feats
for what purpose?
Tyler K. (GM): Go back to 3.X fag
Sorry, gut response
But seriously,
Feats are cancer
Sasha: You just made the a shit ton more boring
Tyler K. (GM): If you don't want to play, don't play dude, I'm not going back on it now
Sasha: No shit all your character look the same to you
I'm not against playing by your rules.
Tyler K. (GM): "I can rolll up a character but I would not want to play it long term, and would dump it after the adventure path"
If all you're going to do is bitch about your character the whole game, then don't play
Sasha: If I want to play a smart character and I roll a shitty Int, all of a sudden I'm screwed over in the long run.
Tyler K. (GM): Its allocatable dude
Sasha: ( I will not bitch a single up if I rolll up a character )
Tyler K. (GM): Again, I'm not making you go 3d6 straight down
Its 6(4d6k3)
Allocate accordingly
Sasha: ( and I am a 3.X fag yes the 3.5 and PF are poorly made and unbalanced, but it is also Fun. dnd 5th ed has all the good and bad problem of 3.5 but less content and dumbed down rules for normies it changed nothing)
rolling 4d6k3
(
6
+
3
+
3
+
1
)
= 12
rolling 4d6k3
(
6
+
1
+
1
+
1
)
= 8
rolling 4d6k3
(
1
+
2
+
2
+
1
)
= 5
rolling 4d6k3
(
1
+
5
+
4
+
1
)
= 10
rolling 4d6k3
(
6
+
6
+
4
+
4
)
= 16
Sasha: rolling 4d6k3
(
2
+
4
+
2
+
1
)
= 8
Tyler K. (GM): If you want to reroll them, you have to accept the reroll
Sasha: look at that amazing line!
Tyler K. (GM): Alright, dude, I'm serious, you can just not play if you're just gonna bitch the whole time
Sasha: ( I am not going to bitch. But for real you can't even dump a stat past 8 if you wanted to.) That array is pretty bad but i'm happy with keeping and playing it
Tyler K. (GM): >le dump stats
Nope, no power gaming going on here
Sasha: it's a verb not a noun
Tyler K. (GM): Don't treat it like a dump stat and use atributes like how they're supposed to be used
A numerical score of the various attributes of a character
If you're guys a really bad talker, a 9 in charisma isn't really doing it justice
Sasha: If you want to do it like that, did you know your in score used to represent your IQ score multiplied by 10. Do you know most clinically mentally retarded have a higher IQ then that?
*INT
Tyler K. (GM): To be diagnosed as having mental retardation, a person must have an I.Q. below 70-75
Sasha: I can put that 5 into INT Score and have a IQ of 50
Tyler K. (GM): IQ isn't entirely book smarts either, it covers a wide variety of areas
And even then
IQ is not as reliable of an indicator of mental aptitude as it is represented as in pop culture
Sasha: ( to be fair I'm referring to AD&D gygaxian fluff )
Tyler K. (GM): I'm not going by ADnD, If I was you would be going 3d6 Straight down
I don't hold DnD basic or ADnD as some sort of Gospel
And again, you can reroll the five if you want
Sasha: I don't want to be unfair to the other players
Tyler K. (GM): They all rerolled
Sasha: i'll think about it.
Tyler K. (GM): Think outside the box a bit, use the lower stats to fluff out you character
A good character is built on flaws
Sasha: i'm by it self that's a fallacious statement.
*i'm sorry
Tyler K. (GM): I don't know how to respond to that
Other than saying "no"
Sasha: i'm back
i admit that was a semantically dickish statment but if a character is mechanically a cripple that does not make them a well roleplayed character if they have no character flaws
Tyler K. (GM): No but a character with a ten in every stat thats fine tuned isn't an interesting or fun addition to the party either
It just makes you a fucking bore and a drag
Who's attatched at the fucking hip to the shitty, bloated, cancer of a fucking system that is 3.X
Sasha: it's not possible to have a ten in every stat and be fine tuned at the same time
Tyler K. (GM): you would know
Also, not the fucking point
Sasha: you should understand there is no difference between 3.5 and 5th ed they are built on the same principles and work the same.
Tyler K. (GM): I don't know how to respond to that
Other than saying "no"
Where do I even fucking start
Sasha: it's true they moved some numbers around but, it uses the same mechanics for a foundation
so please elaborate
Tyler K. (GM): Look dude, I'm done arguing this with you. it's pretty clear that "I like to debate" translates to, "I like being an argumentative shit"
Find a 3.X group if you want to play 3.X
I don't want you in my game if you don't want to play 5E
Sasha: i'm not against playing 5E, I just like talking about my hobbies with people who share the same interests
Tyler K. (GM): This isn't talking about your hobbies, its you being intentionally difficult
Sasha: banter can be seen as such, I'm more then happy to point out all the flaws that 3.X has.
Tyler K. (GM): Before you even start more shit
Tell me
Do you even have a character concept?
Sasha: yes
Tyler K. (GM): And what is it
Sasha: to put it short a rogue, probbaly half ling
as far as alignment goes probbaly lawful good
would such a character be appropriate for the party?
William D.: rolling 3d4
(
4
+
3
+
3
)
= 10
Shoulder Devil: 1716981711
William D.: 4
Tyler K. (GM): kek
also, ignore where I said feats are banned, I have PTSD from 3.X feats and wasn't aware of the changes they made in 5E
Shoulder Devil: 18
Rex S.:
>.>
Tyler K. (GM): We gucci?
Alright
Shoulder Devil: Gucci 5ever
Tyler K. (GM): So
While I type up the intro, everyone give a brief description of their characters
Sasha: Basically a punk with inflated ego that knows martial arts
My Bio might or might not be a joke but the gist is that, she roamed the sea, meet a monk, got taught martial arts and she decided she liked to punch people in the face
Icarus: Born cursed under a solar eclipse, gifted with wild magic, it can't be suppressed nor will it ever be fully under his control.
He takes this all in his stride, he never curses his fate instead seeking to embrace it head on, always itching to travel and quest, to burn brighter day by day.
Tyler K. (GM): You have all been contacted in one way or another by a dwarven man known as Gundren Rockseeker. He's contracted you all to escort a wagon to a little town called Phandalin, paying each of you ten gold pieces for the trip. He was very secretive, about his reasons, but he simply said that it was "something big". He set off a few days ahead of you with a warrior escort named Sildar Hallwinter, You've been on the road for a few days by now, and haven't encountered any trouble so far. But you're entering an area known for being infested with bandits, goblins, and other naerdowells
Are any of you driving the wagon?
Rex S.: Not my guy. He's a sailor. Wagonning not's his expertise.
Sasha: Ditto
Tyler K. (GM): No particular skill is requireed
Its just keeping the oxen straight
Sasha: I'm sure Icarus is doing a great job at it
Rex S.: Definitely!
Tyler K. (GM): Are you two riding on or walking beside the wagon
Icarus: Without action I'd be getting pretty board so manning the wagon would definitely keep my hands busy at least
Sasha: Sasha will walk on the right side of the wagon, her backpack will be onto the thing however, for the sake of being as mobile as possible
Tyler K. (GM): Sounds good, how about you Zared
Zared: Zared is on the rear side of the wagon watching for any sudden movements.
Tyler K. (GM): As you're walking, riding, strolling and patrolling, you notice an obstruction in the road ahead
Sasha: What tipe?
Tyler K. (GM): As your wagon approaches, you notice what it is: two dead horses, about fifty feet ahead, each with several arrows sticking out of them
The woods are sticking very close to the trail here
Icarus: "Whoa there, guess we'll have to clear a path"
Sasha: "Yep... doesn't even look ominous... alright... orc, buddy? Help me move this junk from the road while the cowboy keeps an eye out for an ambush" She begins to approach the wreckage of wagon
Zared: slowly brings himself off the wagon and heads in the woman's direction "Alright. Let's make this quick. As much as I love a fight I like a winning chance Y'know."
Tyler K. (GM): As you approach the horses, you see that their saddlebags have been looted. The bags have initials embroidered onto them
Icarus: "If ya need help just holler"
Tyler K. (GM): "G.R."
In big, Common alphabet letters, as well as in Dwarvish.
Sasha: "We have a wild mage, a half orc and a master of kung fu... I doubt a couple of stray bandits could pose a threat" She looks over the bags... and shrugs, she ain't keen for nobles and whatnot. She does touch one of the dead horses, to see if the corpse is still warm
"Oi, you coming over or you want a sweet lady such as myself to handle all this weight?"
Tyler K. (GM): Horse seems to have been dead roughly a day
Body is cold
Sasha: "Either way, body 's cold, shouldn't be anyone 'round here"
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d6
(
1
)
= 1
Sasha: "Mighty stupid of them, horse meat is tasty"
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+6
(
6
)+6
= 12
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling 3(d20+6)
3
= 3
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+6
(
12
)+6
= 18
Icarus: "Bandits are too lazy to carve up a horse"
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+6
(
9
)+6
= 15
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+6
(
16
)+6
= 22
Sasha: "Too dumb more like, you could save a ton of gold by carving up a horse instead of going buying shit"
Zared: "Yeah yea I'm coming!" *he would slowly jog over to the horse that was nearest to the kung-fu 'master' and cross his arms "So do I get the front or the back?"
Sasha: "...the back, if you would be so kind" She flash a not so charming smile and put herself in front of the head of the animal, ready to move it "Alright, say when big guy"
Tyler K. (GM): Sasha
Lyei H.: Okay, I'm here, sorry about that
Tyler K. (GM): You catch a glimpse of movement in the corner of your eyes, barely poking out of the leaves is a small green humanoid who was trying very hard to blend in
INITIATIVE TIME
Sasha: She raise her voice "We got company, and some idiots that are about to join these horses!"
Tyler K. (GM): Lucia, You were travelling with them, I'm just going to have you sitting in the back of the wagon, that ok?
Asleep, since you didn't catch the bandits
goblins*
Zared: cracks his knuckles as he rises up to look around. "Where's the idiots?" he said in a in very menacing sounding voice looking around
Icarus: "Finally some action"
Sasha: "Gonna guess all 'round us but I caught one that-a-way" She hints with her face, cracking her knuckles
Tyler K. (GM): Everyone roll initiative
Sasha: "Man, my quarterstaff is back on the wagon... guess I will have to break their faces old style, aye?"
Icarus:
Tyler K. (GM): Terrain outside of the road is very overgrown and difficult to move around in, so you'll move at half speed through it
Zared:
Sasha:
(Yo Kami, if you activate the turn system we can do this more smoothly)
Lyei H.:
Tyler K. (GM): rolling 4d20
(
8
+
19
+
17
+
15
)
= 59
Alright
So
Lucia
nvm
The first goblin rushes Sasha, emerging from the brush
Lucia: (So is this purple box the wagon?)
Tyler K. (GM): yeah
Sasha: "Oh, yer the first one looking to get wrecked? 'Aight then!"
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+4
(
5
)+4
= 9
Tyler K. (GM): The Goblin swings with his Schimitar, but you deftly dodge to the side, and it sinks deep into one of the horses
The cold blood flows slowly as he yanks it out of the mare's neck
Sasha: "Man... yer going to enter a world of hurt..."
Tyler K. (GM): Luicia
You're up

Lucia finally bumbles her way out of the wagon. "Did someone say something about breaking faces?" But then, noticing what was going on, she decides to take action without an answer.
Lucia: (So, casting against the goblin that just attacked I suppose?)
Sasha: "Ehe... by the end o' this they will wish only their faces are broken..."
Lucia:
Tyler K. (GM): The one next to sasha?
Lucia: (Yeah)
Tyler K. (GM): What is the roll there, the 11?
Lucia: The 11 is the save DC
Sasha: (The goblins need to save against the attack)
Lucia: (It's save for half)
Sasha: ((Otherwise it strikes for full)
Tyler K. (GM): Right, sorry, been a year and a half since I last Dmd
(To GM) rolling d20+2
(
13
)+2
= 15
Rex S.: idk how much it helps but you're doing fine in my eyes. Even if this is my first time ever doing this lol
Tyler K. (GM): The goblin barely jumps out of the way of the attack, noticing it with just barely a split second, his eyes widen as he dives to the side and scrambles his way back up to his feet
Does he take any damage?
Sasha: (Half)
(So 2)
Tyler K. (GM): The goblin pats a flame that caught on his tunic out before refocusing his attention on Sasha
Sasha: Sasha doesn't look amused
Lucia: (And that's it for turn)
Sasha: "These vermins made the mistake of a lifetime..."

Lucia calls down divine flame to smite the goblin, but isn't that surprised as it narrowly avoids. "Is everyone alright..?"
Sasha: "Yah, for now, just stay on yer toes"
"Archer might try and get ya"
Tyler K. (GM): The Other Goblin Charges Zared, looking less confident than the first one as he sees a flame streak past Sasha's head
(To GM) rolling d20+4
(
10
)+4
= 14
Tyler K. (GM): Do you have any armor on Zared, you're AC seems a bit low
Rex S.: It's just common clothes. Sailors don't get armor >.>
Sasha: (Could've bought some)
Tyler K. (GM): Oh, that sucks
Lucia: (Fighters start with armor?)
(You should have chainmail and a shield)
Tyler K. (GM): You do
Page 72, PHB
Top Left, Equipment
Sasha: ((So his AC should be 15 plus dex, max 2)
((So between 15 and 17)
(Assuming Chainmail and Shield)
Tyler K. (GM): I'm going to treat it as 15 for now
The Schimitar glances off your mail tunic, not doing any damage
But you definitely feel the force of the blow
These guys may be small, but they are not weak by any means
One of the goblins with an arrow takes aim and Takes a pot shot at the wagon, aiming for Icarus' head
(To GM) rolling d20+4
(
2
)+4
= 6
Tyler K. (GM): The arrow goes wide and Strikes the awning above Icarus' head, sticking in there an inch or two. You hear a sharp "twing" as it vibrates quickly after striking the wooden frame
Icarus
It's your turn
Lucia:
(Whoops)
(Ignore that)
Icarus: "Oh I see how it is"

Icarus jumps down from the wagon and with a spring in his step fires back a Fire Bolt at the goblin that shot at him
Icarus:
Tyler K. (GM): (i make a dex opposed throw right?)
Icarus: (nah vs AC I think)
(dem rolls tho)
(I might be wrong never played 5e, don't take my word gm sir)
Sasha: (Yeah it's vs AC)
(It's basically a normal attack)
Tyler K. (GM): Alright
Sasha: (Mr. Casters don't want to use the big guns, they go with the puny cantrips)
(Shame on you)
Tyler K. (GM): The Bolt strikes one of the trees next to the goblin, leaving a smoldering dent, and the acrid smell of arcane smoke fills the air
Icarus: (I don't have a lvl 1 spell with that kinda range)
Lucia: (I'm a terrible combat caster anywyas)
Sasha: "Oi! Don't burn down the whole forest now!"
Tyler K. (GM): Ms Monk
Lucia: "My light doesn't burn plants anyways!"
Tyler K. (GM): The floor is yours
Sasha: "Ah well... 'nyway... I gotta turn this goblin into a corpse"
Zared: is pushed back by the attack and grit his teeth a bit "Heh this will be fun!" and turns toward the arrow head and smiles as he sees a fireball return in the goblins direction. "I like the way he thinks! No more hiding for these evil little things right?!"
Icarus: "My bad, shoulda gone with my gut and cast armor I guess"
Sasha: She pummels the goblin, attacking two times, first with a sucker punch to wind the fucker out, then with a haymaker to cave its face in
Tyler K. (GM): It fucking dies
It dies so hard
Sasha: (The names are flavour, I can attack twice though)
Icarus: (brb)
Sasha: "Yeee... now..." She looks at the archer, walking towards it in a very menacing way "I think you're next, aye? I think now it's a good time to say goodbye to yer companions, little guy..."
Tyler K. (GM): You basically feel the human like skull caving in as your fist connects with it, driving a ki infused waves through its body as it's brain is liquified
Sasha: (I got 40ft total of movement with mobility, hard terrain turns it to 20)
Tyler K. (GM): cool
Lucia, the goblin farthest back takes a Shot at you
(To GM) rolling d20+4
(
17
)+4
= 21
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling 1d6+2
(
6
)+2
= 8
Lucia: (Kay)
Icarus: (back)
Tyler K. (GM): The arrow cuts into your leg, finally striking the wheel behind you, leaving a fairly deep gash in your calf
Take five damage
You hear a satisfied high pitched scream from the culprit
Zared
You're up
Rex?
Zared: would pull out his mace and swing for the tiny green creature's head
Tyler K. (GM): Go for it
Zared:
Tyler K. (GM): You hit the goblin, roll damage
Zared: rolling 1d6
(
4
)
= 4
Sasha: (Just click on the "Mace" part of the attack roll)
(It should roll automatically)
Icarus: (What kinda mace has a range of 60ft? :^ ) )
Zared:
Lucia: (I don't think he's filled it out correctly)
Sasha: (No, clck on the mace here in the chat)
Icarus: -KaoJDI1K27B0FG5kX7F|repeating_attack_-KbNModIT5ydilmcNFTn_attack_dmg
Sasha: (Under (Self(60-foot cone))
(Not you, clod)
Icarus: (I tried to click it lol)
Tyler K. (GM): You do five damage
Sasha: (It's basically like this, an example)
Tyler K. (GM): The Mace Sinks into the target, and manages to connect with his ribcage, and the goblin goes down hard
Sasha: (Then I click on sucker punch)
Tyler K. (GM): You can hear him gasping for breath
Lucia
Go get em
Zared: simply stares down at the creature "You should've ran when you had the chance."
Sasha: "Eheh... sadly, they never had the chance to begin with, aye?"

Lucia tries not to let her injured leg bother her as she returns fire on the creature that shot her.
Lucia:
Icarus: "Aw looks like this'll be over before we can really dig our teeth in"
Zared: "True which is why they should've ran anyway once they saw us."
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+2
(
14
)+2
= 16
Sasha: "Oi, mage boy, help yer buddy over there and try t'a break the archer on da left, don't want no stray arrow taking her eye out, ye?"
Tyler K. (GM): The Other goblin manages to barely hide behind a tree hoping to not get hit by the bulk of the divine energy. He manages to avoid most of it, but his long ears are singed by the blast
Zared
The other goblin makes an attempt at you
Desperately swinging while clutching his chest
(To GM) rolling d20+4
(
8
)+4
= 12
Zared: (So this is another initiative roll or something else?)
Tyler K. (GM): You block his Schimitar with your shield and send it glancing off, its weight carrying him a bit with it
No, I'm rolling for the goblins in secret
Sasha: (GM only rolls)
Lucia: (That and flavor text)
Tyler K. (GM): And comparing them to your AC
Zared: (Ah)
Tyler K. (GM): You see the look of desperation grow wider in the goblin's face
Sasha: ((I have about 8 ways to describe my unharmed attacks)
Tyler K. (GM): The goblin that shot at Icarus sees Sasha approaching and quickly retrains his bow on her
(To GM) rolling d20+4
(
15
)+4
= 19
Tyler K. (GM): The trees manage to help you confuse your target so he can't land a true shot, but he manages to get a grazing strike on your right shoulder
Take two damage
Zared: smiles as he sees the look on the goblin's face "Wasn't expecting that huh? We're nothing like the folks who rode in on those horses."
Tyler K. (GM): Icarus
Sasha: She looks at her wound. Raise an eyebrow. Then look at the goblin, sporting a cruel smile "Alright..."
"Mage boy, turn your attention to the others... this one is mine"
Tyler K. (GM): (brb, gonna piss)
Icarus: Seeing how the fight is turning Icarus switches focus to the goblin to his far right and lobs another Fire Bolt
(see that's more like the kinda roll I wanna see)
Sasha: (At least in this campaign the monsters aren't costantly focusing you down :^))
(Might be the first time in a long while I see you not on the brink of death)
Tyler K. (GM): alright
Icarus: (Hope so casters are much squishier)
Sasha: (If the goblin gets a crit and puts you down I'll laugh so hard)
Tyler K. (GM): The bolt strikes the Goblin square in the chest, and he gets sent flat on his ass, as the firebolt sets the brush around him smoldering
Sasha
Sasha: She approaches the goblin
She first heatbutt the fucker, then feeds him a knuckle sandwich, in the attempt to break his jaw
Tyler K. (GM): You can hear the goblin's bones crunch a bit as the life drains from his eyes
Zared: (Good lord lol)
Tyler K. (GM): (as a side note, jesus you do a lot of damage)
Sasha: (It's just a 1d4)
Tyler K. (GM): (but these are just gobbos)
Sasha: (+dex)
Tyler K. (GM): Anyway
He ded
Sasha: Ded motherfucker
Tyler K. (GM): The other goblin notices that the tide of the battle is turning rather quickly, and starts to make a break for it into the woods
He's still in sight, but he'll be out of sight in a few more seconds
Sasha: (I could actually almost reach it)
Tyler K. (GM): Zared
Sasha: (While I dash I ignore hard terrain with Mobility feat)
Zared: notices the fleeing goblin and tries to catch up to the cretin "Oh no you don't! You're not getting away from us!"
Sasha: ((I think you still need to kill the one in front of you)
Tyler K. (GM): If you move he'll get an oppritunity attack against you
You won't be able to catch up with the goblin
Zared: stops himself mid-first step and looks down at the one that is still singed from the last attack "I almost forgot about you!" would then get his ol' trust mace to do what it does best.
Tyler K. (GM): kek, roll d6+strength
Zared:
Lucia: (Press the mace in the chat box)
Sasha: (The literal word "Mace")
(Under "Self")
(In this chat)
(Not on the sheet)
(Click it with the mouse)
Lucia: http://puu.sh/tAlR2/580cf27903.png
The one right there
Zared:
Sasha: (There ya go)
(>0)
Tyler K. (GM): Just roll d6+strength
Zared: (I'm sorry. Newborn Dnd player >.>)
Icarus: (lol)
Sasha: (Kek)
(Roll 1d6+STR then)
Zared: rolling 1d6
(
6
)
= 6
rolling 1d6 + 12
(
4
)+12
= 16
Tyler K. (GM): (Strength mod kek)
Lucia: (Never use the actual score, always use the mod)
Tyler K. (GM): Either way he's dead
Your mace Dents his helmet as you cave his skull in and he goes flying back and slumps against the horse
Lucia

Lucia moves forward to continue to fight the goblin that shot her..!
Lucia:
Sasha: "Maybe we should let it run, so it can warm the rest of its kin that we aren't to be messed with"
"It can warn, rather"
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+2
(
7
)+2
= 9
Tyler K. (GM): It catches on fire and goes down screaming
Sasha: "Or we can cave its head in, that's fine by me, ey"
Tyler K. (GM): You can smell the smoke of divine fire searing the flesh of the unworthy
Zared: "Yea...But it could be even more if they are stupid enough to try and avenge their buddies."
Icarus: "Maybe if we let it run it could've come back with a real challenge"
Sasha: "Tsk... goblins ain't exactly courageous enough to do that kind of business, ye know?"
"They know we mean business, they stay clear"
"Either way, I'm fine either way"

Lucia sent the fire flying anyways, goblin's dead, oh well? "U-Um...Everyone's alright, right?"
Tyler K. (GM): All four Goblins lie dead before you
Sasha: "All in a day's work"
Icarus: "Peachy"
Sasha: "Now help me with the horses"
"Ain't earned your break yet, green boy"
Tyler K. (GM): Its obvious to you that these goblins killed the horses of Gundren and his warrior escort
The arrows sticking out the wagon and the ones in the horses are identitcal
Icarus: "Aww shit these were the employers horses weren't they"
Sasha: "Uh? Were they now?"
Zared: Sighs as he goes to pick up the tail end of the horse she was on "Who died and made you lea-" *turns to the mage "You're joking."
Icarus: "Yeah you can tell by the emblem on the satchel"
Sasha: "Uhn... shit..."
"What is in the wagon anyway?"
Tyler K. (GM): The satchel on the horse had a big "GR" embroidered on iit
In Common and Dwarven
Zared: "What the hell do we do now?"
Sasha: "Since the guy's dead we can just sell what we are carrying"
"Keep the ox and wagon as bonus"
"Or ain't that how it works?"
"I ain't sure how laws are in this region, forgive me"
Icarus: "His body's not here, if we're lucky he might have gotten away"

Lucia seems like she's trying to figure out what's going on...Or maybe she's just lost in thought. "So...What's going on?"
Tyler K. (GM): The wagon has about 100 gold in resources, and the general store in town is expecting you to deliver the supplies with Gundren. There's no way he'll give you the money without him there
Icarus: "Not that I have high hopes"
Sasha: "Our employer 's dead honey"
Tyler K. (GM): You could look around the area
Sasha: "Something is tellin' me we're supposed to save the fucker"
She sighs "Gonna ask for a bonus tho"
Tyler K. (GM): (the voice of god)
Sasha: (I am a monk so it works)
Zared: "Well damn he could be anywhere in this forest."
Sasha: "The goblin that was running away was headed east... maybe we can start combing that-a-way?"
Icarus: "Goblins have been known to take captors, but they don't last long"
Tyler K. (GM): You notice what the goblin was making a break for
Behind a thicket too thick to see past, you notice an overgrown foot trail
Sasha: (By the way, how does Lucia looks like? Tiefling I assume?)
Lucia: (Tiefling, with horns like in the pic, and a spaded tail. Otherwise like the pic)
Zared: "Alright so we're hunting that goblin down then?"
Sasha: "Ehy, horny, do you need ta rest?"
Icarus: "Looks like this isn't going to be the walk in the park it first appeared ay"

Icarus smiles with excitement
Sasha: "Red looks good on you but you might want to keep some of that dye in your veins, aye?"
Zared: seems to be staring off in the direction of where the goblin was last seen. "Who's going to stay here with the girl?"
Sasha: She heads to the wagon then, to fetch her quarterstaff "Nobody, we're all goin'"

Lucia had seemed to be spending so much time worrying about the others that she didn't reealize her own leg was still bleeding. "O-Oh, right!"
Tyler K. (GM): You all notice foot tracks with two long tracks trailing behind them
Sasha: "We all took the job, we all do our part, aye? 'Sides, I bet she ain't too keen on being left behind either"
Lucia:
(I would heal myself back to full with the minimum roll anyways)
Tyler K. (GM): Some blood covers the ruts in the dirt periodically

Icarus casts Mage Armor as a precaution
Icarus:
Sasha: She swing her quarterstaff with discipline "Aight... let's tie the ox down and let's go, no time to waste"
"Mage boy, yer got ox duty, find some rope and tie it to a tree or something"
Icarus: "Won't be caught of guard this time"
Zared: "Pretty sure I left my rope in the wagon. There should be enough."
Lucia: "Er, I have some rope if you need it?"
"Or that too.."
Sasha: "Tsk... that is why I never bring rope... too heavy and everyone has it anyway..." She smirks
"Bet you all got coils fifty feet long, aye?"
"Hempen, ye?"

Icarus takes some rope from his pack and ties the beast to a tree with a simple but sturdy knot
Zared: "Ready?"
Icarus: "Right they should be all good now"
Sasha: She toys for a couple of seconds with a rabbit foot necklace, that she then ties around her neck "Yep, let's go" Onward they go
Tyler K. (GM): Alright, so you're all setting down the trail right?
Sasha: Aye aye cap'tn
Tyler K. (GM): What's the marching order?
Sasha: Sasha will go first, assuming Zared does not want the spot and assuming the road can't take two of them on the same line
Icarus: (two casters in the back, two meatshields up front?)
Sasha: (Works for me)
Tyler K. (GM): Everyone good with that?
Zared: (Fine by me)
Lucia: (If it's only single file I'll go in front of Icarus since I have armor)
Tyler K. (GM): Alright, so you make your way down the trail
Lucia: (Or should I go behind to watch the back?)
Sasha: (I think it's 2x2)
Lucia: (That works too)
Tyler K. (GM): It's 1x4
Sasha: (Oh)
Tyler K. (GM): Its a particularly thick growth
Sasha: (Yeah, you should watch the back then)
Tyler K. (GM): It's meant for goblins, not full size humanoids
Icarus: (unless you want me in back, I don't mind)
Sasha: (That's our formation, basically)
(Let's go and kill some gobbos)
Tyler K. (GM): As you make your way down the trail, Sasha, you notice a thin length of wire on the ground, barely peeking out of the undergrowth
Sasha: "Halt... trap here..."
Tyler K. (GM): You've been walking for about 10 minutes
Sasha: "Check it, got wire... walk over it..." She steps over the wire
Tyler K. (GM): I'm assuming none of you intentionally trigger the wire, otherwise you continue
Zared: crosses his arms as he follows in her foot steps and takes the same big step she took "Guess we're getting close eh?"
Sasha: "Ye, keep your eyes sharp"
Onward they go
Tyler K. (GM): You keep making your way down the trail
Another few minutes pass, when the ground gives just slightly to you Sasha, alerting you to a pit right in front of you. You have to stop yourself very quickly, and you manage to not fall into the trap.
Sasha: "Oi oi don't push!"
"Pit here, walk 'round it"
Tyler K. (GM): You can faintly smell the metallic scent of blood coming from the leaves
Sasha: "Speakin' o' which... pit means we're prolly very close..."
"Walk lightly, aye?"
She tries to keep walking forward after avoiding the pit without making a sound
Tyler K. (GM): No stealth check needed
Sasha: Just in case yo
Tyler K. (GM): You've traveled about five miles from the ambush site
Sasha: (Christ)
Tyler K. (GM): The trail opens into a tiny opening, on the other side of which is a hillside with a cave opening, and a river flowing out of it
On the other side of the stream is a thick, dense briar thicket
Sasha: She prepares her quarterstaff "Careful for traps and get ready to collect some goblin ears"
"By the end of this I want a pretty necklace"
Tyler K. (GM): Looks impenetrable, but the opening is on the other side of the stream
Sasha: (So wait, we need to swim to enter?)
Tyler K. (GM): No, but its fairly deep, past your ankles
Sasha: "Careful... they might have beartraps in the water..."
Zared: "Goblins aren't that smart are they?"
Sasha: Go Go Gadget, Perception roll
Icarus: "They put bear traps in water? really?"
Sasha: "They might"
"Hard to see the shining of the metal underwater"
Lucia: "I hope they don't.."
Tyler K. (GM): No traps you can see
Zared: "Maybe I should take lead then. I might be the only one here that's got decent eyes in the dark"
Sasha: She walks in the river, tapping her quarterstaff on the ground in front of her, to make sure no trap is in place "Just step where I step"*
"Uhn... nah, but you can hold me a torch"
"Ehy, mage boy, any light in yer book?"
"Whatabout you, horny?"
Icarus: "I can cast light on somethin if you need be"
Tyler K. (GM): On the east side of the stream flowing from the cave mouth, a small area in the briar thickets has been hollowed out to form a lookout post or blind. Wooden planks flatten out the briars and provide room for guards to lie hidden and watch the area-including a pair of goblins lurking there right now!
Sasha: "My staff, if ya please"
Lucia: "Erm...Y-Yeah, I can too..."
Icarus: "Lasts an hour"
Tyler K. (GM): They hear you,
Splashing across the water
Sasha: "Time ta rumble"
Tyler K. (GM): Roll Initiative
Sasha:
Zared:
Icarus:
Lucia:
Sasha: (Do we get visual aid?)
Tyler K. (GM): You're still in the light
Natural Light
Let me draw it out
Sasha: (I mean, do we get a map?)
Tyler K. (GM): Yeah
Sorry
Sasha: (We're still at the road)
(kek)
(Move us around based on the entrance if need be)
Tyler K. (GM): I will
Oh before I forget, the road encounter and goblin trail gives you 75 XP
Ok
Everyone with me?
Sasha: (yep)
Icarus: (Da)
Lucia: (Yep)
Tyler K. (GM): Stream area is blue
Sasha: (The night is young)
Tyler K. (GM): Green scribbles are thickets
(To GM) rolling 2d20+2
(
19
+
4
)+2
= 25
Tyler K. (GM): Icarus
Go first

Icarus takes aim at the goblin on the right and throws a Fire Bolt
Icarus:
Tyler K. (GM): The goblin goes up in flame with nary a cry as the flames consume his body
Sasha
Sasha: She dashes to the goblin. Then sports a wicked smile "Ehy little guy... how about you take a knee before I break both of your legs?"
Icarus: "Cooked goblin anyone" he says in goblin to taunt the remaining one
Sasha: (End of turn because I can't attack)
Tyler K. (GM): The other one looks visibly scared
Zared: (Can you imitidate someone out of a battle?)
Tyler K. (GM): You can make a check for it
When your turn comes up
Lucia
Sasha: ((Actually got -2 to intimidation)
Lucia: (One sec)
(Phone call from work)
Tyler K. (GM): s'good
we're gonna be going for another hour btw, we'll call it after that
ten-ten thirty CST depending on where we are

Lucia decides to follow the lead of the other two, taking the fight immediately to the goblins. Sacred flame go?
Lucia:
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+2
(
2
)+2
= 4
Tyler K. (GM): The other goblin goes up in flame as well as a divine light sears flesh from bone
Sasha: "Uhn... guess I ain't breaking a bone this time 'round..."
Zared: "You'll get your chance."
Sasha: "Oh I ain't complainin'"
Tyler K. (GM): Sasha is unable to reach the goblins before the casters cast their spells and the goblins go up in flame
Sasha: "Matter of fact, if this keeps going on I might just go sippin' wine for the next fight, ah!"
Lucia: "...You have wine?"
Icarus: "Be our guest if every encounter goes like this"
Sasha: "Not at the moment, nah"
Tyler K. (GM): The stream flows out of the cave mouth, a dry path on the eastern side
Do you go in?
Zared: "Had my hopes up."
Lucia: "And those goblins were going to attack us, right..?"
Sasha: "We'll get plenty to drink after this job, worry not greenie"
"Horny, you're a cutie"
"But I'm afraid so, aye"
"Doubt they were going to ask questions"
"Anyway, let's go save our guy"

Lucia just clams up at that comment.
Sasha: She begins walking down the cave
Zared: follows all the while looking around for any sign of fun to arrive
Tyler K. (GM): Gimme a sec to draw stuff up

Lucia follows along, trying not to let her silent embarrassment get in the way of keeping an eye out.
Sasha: (Take your time)
Tyler K. (GM): You casted Light, correct?
Sasha: (On my staff, I think)
Lucia: (On the staff was what was requested)
Icarus: (yep on the staff)
Lucia: (Zared and I also have darkvision)
Icarus: (I too have darkvision)
Zared: (Is sasha the only blind one right now?)
Icarus: (guess so lol)
Sasha: (Blind human)
(I'm a monk tho, it fits the theme)
Tyler K. (GM): She's got light in a 20 ft radius and dim in another 20 ft
Marching order same as the trail?
Lucia: (Also what race is Icarus, out of curiosity)
Sasha: (Ye)
Icarus: (Half-elf)
(Part drow maybe going by his complexion and high Cha)
Tyler K. (GM): Just inside the cave mouth, a few uneven stone steps to the right lead up to a small, dank chamber on the east side of the passage.The cave narrows to a steep fissure at the far end, and is filled with the stench of animals. Savage snarls and the sounds of rattling chains greet your ears where two wolves are chained up just inside the opening. Each wolf's chain leads to an iron
rod driven into the base of a stalagmite.
Sasha: "Uhn... might be a problem, should put 'em down, most likely"
Tyler K. (GM): They snarl and bark, but you don't hear any movement
Their emaciated and rabid appearance seems to indicate the goblins don't pay them much mind
Zared: "Hmm. Maybe we could get'em on our side?"
"I doubt the goblins treat'em all that well."
Sasha: 8brb9
Tyler K. (GM): You gonna try Calming them down?
Icarus: "Dried rations aren't exactly a pups best friend"
Tyler K. (GM): You won't be able to get through that room without either killing them or calming them down in some way
Zared: "Yea but free food is free food right?"
Tyler K. (GM): Who's gonna try it
Icarus: "I don't know sleep do you?" He looks to Lucia
Lucia:
(Why do I keep clicking the wrong thign)
Sasha: (Back)
Lucia: "N-No, I don't..."
Sasha: "Ehy, I'm welcome to calm down the dogs, not keen on killing these guys... still, if we're out of options that seems the only way"
Tyler K. (GM): So you gonna try feeding and talking them down?
Lucia: "I could just try giving them some rations.."
Zared: "I'll give it to them."
Sasha: "Aight aight... let me see now..."
"Nah nah, let me handle this... it needs a female touch..."
She takes some dried meat from her rations and tries to approach the wolves
(SHIT)

Lucia is female too, though.
Sasha: (She's too horny)
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+1.
(
15
)+1
= 16
Sasha: (How many fingers do I lose')
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+1
(
12
)+1
= 13
Tyler K. (GM): You drop the ration as they snap at you
One of their rods seems to loosen a bit from the wall, but the other struggles to no avaliable
Avail*
Sasha: "Er... nevermind... ye go at it green boy..." She steps back, patting Zared in the shoulder
Tyler K. (GM): They eat up the food hastily as you step back
Sasha: On the shoulder
Tyler K. (GM): As Zared goes up, they begin a low growl and snarl at the half orc
Not as harsh as before though
More guarded, less agressive
Icarus: "Think you could scar em into submission?"
Zared: *would then take what was left of the rations and bring them to the wolves he'd give them all quite the death glare and simply barked out the order "Sit!" he said it with as much authority as his orc blood would allow
Icarus: *scare
Zared:
Tyler K. (GM): The dogs ears go flat against their head as you bellow at the top of your lungs, they slowly step back and curl up in the corner and clear a path for you
Icarus: "Atta boy, intimidation ain't my forte so I'm glad you got that covered"
Sasha: "Good job green... just... uh... keep the barking stance while I go through..."
Zared: "Got it."
Sasha: The monk walks forward
Tyler K. (GM): Here you see a pile of rubbish and garbage
It seems to come from a fissure above
Zared: goes to pet the wolves as to keep their minds preoccupied with their new master
Sasha: "Uhn... guess this side simply is the garbage corner..."
She tries to see if there is anything worth jack
Not getting hands dirty or any of that though
Tyler K. (GM): Just bones with scraps of meat unfortunately
Sasha: "Nothing here, let's carry on"
Icarus: "Whoops guess we didn't need to bother with that hehe"
Sasha: "At least we didn't have to kill the dogs for nothin'"
Tyler K. (GM): You continue along down the cave, all natural light has faded away, you're only relying on your dark vision or the light from your staff
Lucia: (But I was in the back on the path?)
Icarus: (Range on Light ain't grand btw 20ft bright another 20ft dim iirc)
Zared: (So I'm still with the dogs right?)
Sasha: (I'd assume you follow us)
(Unless you want us to explore by ourselves)
Zared: (Nope I'm with you guys then)
Sasha: (By the way, do we get XP for the two goblins and from dealing with the wolves in a peaceful manner?)
Tyler K. (GM): The main passage from the cave mouth climbs steeply upward, the stream plunging and splashing down its west side. In the shadows, a side passage leads west across the other side of the stream.
Sasha: (How deep the stream?)
Tyler K. (GM): The members of the party with darkvision can view a bridge up ahead as well
It goes over the passage
The stream is a bit above ankle height
Sasha: Assuming that the party will inform Sasha of what is up with the bridge, she will push onward to it
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+6
(
4
)+6
= 10
Tyler K. (GM): They notice a gobbo on the bridge who hasn't seen the party yet
Zared: "We've hit a fork in the roa-...Cave...." would then press his hand on the monk "Stop it"
(Monk's shoulder)
Sasha: "Whazat?"
Zared: "Two different directions. One of them has a goblin on it."
Sasha: "Where's the goblin?"
Zared: "Straight."
"He doesn't see us yet."
Sasha: "Imma kill it" She rushes straight
Tyler K. (GM): The Bridge is above the passage
Sasha: (Surprise round?)
Tyler K. (GM): You would have to jump up about six or seven feet
Sasha: (Wait
(Oh I see))
(SO the bridge is above us)
(Nevermind then)
Tyler K. (GM): My b
Sasha: "Oi, mage, take the light off while we go through the river"
Icarus: "Why?"
Sasha: "Or we could go straight... either way, they might spot us with this light thing"
Tyler K. (GM): Make that about twenty feet up
Sasha: "Or it does not matter for them?"
Tyler K. (GM): You would all have to stealth past the goblin
Sasha: "Can't ye burn it?"
Zared: "I think Horny would be better for the job considering last time."
Lucia: "I-I do have a name you know..."
Tyler K. (GM): The passage to the west is choked with rubble, and contains two steep escarpments with a fragile ledge connecting the two of them
Sasha: "Ye, Horny"
She snickers
Zared: "Heh. tell us when you've taken care of that goblin alright?"
"If you would please?"
Sasha: "I'll pat your head if you do, howzabout it?"
Lucia: (Is 60 foot range enough to reach there?)
Sasha: "Mage boy, be ready to follow up with Horny, just in case, ya?"
Icarus: "Righto"
Tyler K. (GM): Let me see
Sasha: (I think the distance really doesn't change that much)
(It is still a straight line)
Tyler K. (GM): yeah
(tfw worked it out using pythagorean theorem
Zared: (Currently trying to work it into my math and hating it >.>)

Lucia finally decides to just light the goblin up, at least so the rest of the group will stop saying 'Horny, do the thing'.
Lucia:
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+2
(
1
)+2
= 3
Tyler K. (GM): He fails to see the bolt coming, and doesn't dodge in time
He dies
Lucia: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A_sY2rjxq6M
Zared: (BURN Baby burn!)
Tyler K. (GM): A bit of a short session, but do you guys want to call it here?
Sasha: "Good shot, Horny, barely have to do anything today... easiest job I ever got"
Shoulder Devil: And if you so desire, sure
Tyler K. (GM): I want to make sure I'm not scrambling for these next parts
Lyei H.: If the group wants to call it here, sure
Shoulder Devil: It's 5am for me
Tyler K. (GM): And I'm sure the tea is going to be wearing off soon
Lyei H.: And again, sorry for oversleeping
Shoulder Devil: At this point it doesn't matter if I keep going or not
William D.: I'm happy to call it here
Tyler K. (GM): For the sake and health of my eurobros, I'll call it here
Zared: (I'm fine with that. I gotta fine tune this char sheet anyway lol)
Tyler K. (GM): Alright, so remember guys
6 PM CST
Lyei H.: And I just realized that I never rolled for money
I'll put an alarm in my phone to wake me up every wednesday
Shoulder Devil: You either get the starting equipment or roll the dosh
Lyei H.: Oh, okay
Shoulder Devil: Regardless, seriously, don't worry for me, if I can't hold on I'll tell you
Tyler K. (GM): Alright man, but I'm a bit disorganized right now too, this was a good trial session though
Rex S.:
Rex S.:
Rex S.:
Tyler K. (GM): OK
FUCK
Is everyone here?
ROLL CALL
Sasha Vashchenko: yus
Icarus: (here)
Lyei H.: Ayy
Tyler K. (GM): Alright, i'm assuming Rex is still connecting
So
LAST TIME, ON
GAME
THERE WERE SOME GOBLINS
YOU BEAT THEM UP
Tyler K. (GM): YOU WENT TO THEIR CAVE
YOU SCARED SOME DOGGOS
Rex S.: (Because half-orc bitch)
Tyler K. (GM): AND BURNT A BRIDGE GUARD ALIVE
Lyei H.: (Kill all goblins)
Tyler K. (GM): All to find a dwarf and his guard who were kidnapped and whom you are attempting to find
NOW
FOR
DUNGEON
BALL
Z
Tyler K. (GM): Alright
So you have just set fire to the guard
Lyei H.: Some kind of holy light fire
Tyler K. (GM): He is dead
How do you proceed
Sasha Vashchenko: She looks over the river "Ehy... I think that way will allow us to reach the bridge without us needing to climb the wall... let's head that a way, keep your spell jibba jabba ready"
Tyler K. (GM): To the left there are two precarious ledges that don't look like they can take much weight
And up ahead, you can hear the source of the river crashing down
stream*
Zared: *stares at the ledges and sighs "There's no way we're all going to be able to cross them."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Uhn... maybe your right... better not risk it, aye? Let's push forward then"
Tyler K. (GM): You all push forward then?
Sasha Vashchenko: "If there is a waterfall, chances are there are stairs leading upwards, ye?"
Lucia: "M...Maybe?"
Icarus: "No reason to doubt it"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Then stop sleepin' and start followin'"
"Yep"
"Try not to fall, ground's slippery"
Tyler K. (GM): The stream passage continues up beyond another set of
uneven steps ahead, bending eastward as it goes. A waterfall
sounds out from a larger cavern somewhere ahead of you.
You can hear the clanging of armor up ahead
Zared: "You can smell the goblin from here. How'd you learn magic so well Hor-....Miss?"
Sasha Vashchenko: She approaches one of the rocks, trying to hide behind it while looking around for the source of the armor
Rather, the clanging of the armor
Tyler K. (GM): roll stealth
Zared: would put his arm out to the others motioning them to stop
Tyler K. (GM): Sasha, roll stealth
Sasha Vashchenko:
Tyler K. (GM): You are able just barely make out the forms of three goblins in front of you
Sasha Vashchenko: She turns to the half orc, she raise three fingers, close her hand into a fist and gives an amused smile
(Can we start a surprise round?)
(Or at least, can Sasha?)
Tyler K. (GM): if the others succeed in a stealth roll
Lucia:
Icarus:
(Stealthy like a fox!)
Zared: *would then pull out a rather sharp looking war pick and a massive mace, then slightly turning his head to the two he'd whisper "Three of them. Be ready"
Tyler K. (GM): (Zared roll stealth
Lucia: (But are you going to roll stealth)
Tyler K. (GM): If you want
Zared:
Tyler K. (GM): Alright, so you all manage to move without being noticed, due to the sound of the waterfall covering up your movement
You can all move up to 30ft
You have managed to sneak up on the goblins, roll initiative
Icarus:
Lucia:
Sasha Vashchenko:
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling 3d20+2
(
18
+
11
+
12
)+2
= 43
Zared:
Rex S.: (Nice I'm not last for once!~)
Tyler K. (GM): Alright, Adventurers, you go first
Sasha
How do you proceed
Sasha Vashchenko: She just rushes in, shock and awe baby. She slams her quarterstaff on the goblin's helmet to stun it, then follows with a roundhouse kick
Lucia: (Aren't the square shapes on the ground supposed to be the squares)
Sasha Vashchenko:
Tyler K. (GM): (its a rough estimate, but yeah
Sasha Vashchenko: (We need to stay in the squares?))
Tyler K. (GM): (not super hardcore about it, but it helps keep everything tidy
its not a big deal
Sasha Vashchenko:
Tyler K. (GM): Anyway, You slam your quarterstaff into the goblin's helmet, rattling his brains around,but the roundhouse fails to find a good target and glances off his armor
Icarus
Sasha Vashchenko: (When moving through allies, I think it is considered hard terrain, ye?)

Icarus lobs a fire bolt towards the farthest back goblin
Icarus:
Tyler K. (GM): At who?
The fire Catches the goblin's cuffs on fire and singes his arm, while not outright killing him, the burns definitely hurt
Zared
Zared: charges at the currently burned goblin. Both his weapons in hand he'd swipe at the green creature's side
Tyler K. (GM): You'd have to move past this guy first
Lucia: (Which would provoke an AoO)
Tyler K. (GM): You can attack him instead if you want
Zared: (Do that)
Tyler K. (GM): You fucking stick the goblin
The Warpick pierces through the helmet and satisfyingly sinks into the skull
You have a bit of trouble as you yank it out, with a heavy tug
The Goblin collapses at your feet
Lucia

Lucia calls holy fire down on the one Sasha smacked. May as well finish it off, right?
Lucia:
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+2
(
20
)+2
= 22
Tyler K. (GM): The Goblin manages to barely get out of the way, stumbling back into the pool behind him, barely hanging on to life
He Cries out in his shrill voice through his rotten teeth before he hits the pond
"GET KLARG
"
"HURRY"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Will do" She replies in an arrogant tone of voice
Tyler K. (GM): Sasha
You're turn
Sasha Vashchenko: Instead of focusing in the one at the pond, the monk rushes to the one deeper in the cave, not wanting it to raise an alarm or whatever else
(Wait)
(How deep is the water?)
(I assumed he wasn't on its feet, might be wrong)
Tyler K. (GM): About four feet
He's injured too remember
Sasha Vashchenko: Does it get an AoO?
Tyler K. (GM): Its too busy trying to not drown
Sasha Vashchenko: (Then I stand by my action)
Tyler K. (GM): Alright
Go for it
Sasha Vashchenko: She slams her quarterstaff into the goblin, then trash it around, striking its neck
Tyler K. (GM): He manages to duck beneath the quarterstaff attack, but you catch him with a knee to the solarplexus
Sasha Vashchenko:
(Ignore the +3)
Tyler K. (GM): He stumbles back, the wind knocked out of his chest as you feel a few ribs crack
Zared: "You're getting a little rusty there. We need them dead you know?"
Tyler K. (GM): The pool goblin tries to drag himself to shore, while sputtering blood and water out of his mouth
(To GM) rolling d20+2
(
3
)+2
= 5
Sasha Vashchenko: She scoffs "Tsk... greenie, I'm using my bare fists here, give me some credit..."
Tyler K. (GM): He barely manages to crawl back on shore
The Pool Goblin cries out again "BIZZT, HURRY, GET KLARG, TELL HIM WE'VE GOT COMPANY"
The goblin apparently named Blizzt lets out a yelp as he manages to slip away from Sasha into the dark
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ach! He slipped right past me!"
Icarus: "There goes the element of surprise moving forward"
Zared: "Rusty! What happened to all that strength earlier?" He said with a cocky little grin on his sharp tusked face
Tyler K. (GM): You Hear A Massive Roar and the Thud of Armor Against Stone
(To GM) rolling d20+2
(
11
)+2
= 13
Sasha Vashchenko: "This... does not bode well for us..."
Zared: would then grip on to his weapons tightly and let out a roar of his own "Come on. Surely you've been wanting this as much as I have!" he seemed -eager- to say the least
Tyler K. (GM): Icarus
You're up

Icarus attempts to pick off the remaining goblin with another fire bolt
Icarus:

Lucia pauses a bit at all the noise making. "Are you sure that's a good idea..?"
Sasha Vashchenko: "I'm telling you... I ain't liking this..."
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling 5d8+2
(
2
+
6
+
8
+
2
+
4
)+2
= 24
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling 5d8+2
(
6
+
7
+
6
+
3
+
6
)+2
= 30
Sasha Vashchenko: "Running away now is foolish however..."
Icarus: "Whoops"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Horny, Mage boy, get ready to cover our asses, we're going to hold the line!"
Zared: "And the cowards way out and I'm no coward!"
Icarus: "You want to get paid don't you?"
Tyler K. (GM): You miss the goblin, barely scraping the helmet with your firebolt, but the water mitigates any effects it could have
Zared
Zared: would then go to toss his mace into his other hand and reach for one of his handaxes he had tucked away in his waist "Sister I could use some of your luck right now!" he would then toss the axe aiming for the goblin's skull
Tyler K. (GM):
Zared:
Tyler K. (GM): It manages to stick into the goblin's head as he lies face down at the edge of the makeshift dam
The water tinted a foul color by the presence of the goblin blood
Zared: whispers "Thank you once again dear sister."
Sasha Vashchenko: "If we survive this, remember to drag the damn thing out of the river, last thing we need is to poison the river"
Zared: "You're carrying it this time."
Sasha Vashchenko: She sighs
"Ye truly don't understand the heart of a maiden"
Zared: "I do. But you're not one."
Icarus: "Ha!"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Truly got no manners..." She sighs, acting hurt

Lucia isn't sure what's going on with all this snarking since that roaring just happened.
Tyler K. (GM): Alright
So how do you all proceed
The Roaring came from this way
Sasha Vashchenko: (We still in turns?)
Tyler K. (GM): And the bridge is to your west
no
Sasha Vashchenko: (That is a fundamental detail)

Lucia would step closer to where the others were, trying to see what was down that hall
Sasha Vashchenko: "Uhn... guess it is waiting for us..."
Zared: "Aww. Come on. Not like I'd be able to hold the line with a maiden right?" He'd say before gripping onto his weapons with both of his hands now
Sasha Vashchenko: She approaches the dead goblin, trying to fish it out with her quarterstaff
Tyler K. (GM): You can see a faint glow from what appears to be a fireplace down the hall
Sasha Vashchenko: "Nah, ye burnt all your good boy points with me, greenie, no soup tonight for ye"
Tyler K. (GM): (>GBP)
Sasha Vashchenko: (Is the goblin fished from the river?)
Tyler K. (GM): Yeah, you managed to get him out of the river
Sasha Vashchenko: "Aight... onward then"
Tyler K. (GM): The pool is already starting to clear up, and will probably be completely flushed in the hour
Lucia: "Y-You guys didn't forget about the roar, right? There's a fire down that way though, I think.."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ye but horny, if we don't go meet it then it might sneak on us"
"Worse case scenario, we can always retreat, ye?"
"Just stay behind us, we'll keep ye safe"
Lucia: "You just seem way too carefree..?"
Icarus: "Pfft we can take anything these green munchkins can throw at us"
"Probably"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Right now ain't the time to discuss feelings, let's go"
Zared: Alright you heard her!
Lucia: "O-Okay.."
Tyler K. (GM): As you come down the hall you see a.. peculiar site
(give me a sec to get this all down
"WHO DARES CHALLENGE THE GREAT KLARG" a massive bugbear bellows from a stool set behind a roaring fireplace. The Bugbear is covered in gaudy, cheap looking jewlery, some with the skulls of various creatures, humanoid and not hanging from some of them. A crudely drawn banner hangs behind the barstool In what appears to be goblin blood. His guards have armor that is crudely painted in what appears to be cheap gold paint stolen from one of the many caravans
The face below is what the banner looks like
He pets what looks like a wolf who's fur has been died black
Sasha Vashchenko: "Oh... I even got hyped for this..."
Tyler K. (GM): He Picks up the barely conscious goblin that managed to slip past sasha
"YOU HAVE FAILED THE GREAT AND MIGHTY KLARG
He Hurls the Goblin At the Wall in front of the party
The cave shakes a bit with the force of the impact, denting the metal armor and eliciting a sickening crack from the goblin's spine
He picks up his gaudily and crudely decorated morningstar and stands up from his chair

Lucia winces at the noise of it.
Zared: walks up behind the dissappointed warrior and eyes widen in shock as he sees the goblin become one with the wall "....That would cause a mutiny." he seemed a bit angry now. Something about that didn't sit all to right with him.
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ye, innit?"
Tyler K. (GM): "LET ALL WHO HEAR THE VOICE OF THE GREAT AND MIGHTY KLARG, KNOW, WHAT TRUE FEAR FEELS LIKE"
Icarus: "This'll be easier than I expected if he's dumb enough to kill his own troops"
Tyler K. (GM): He lets out a roar that shakes the dust off some of barrels
Sasha Vashchenko: She does a cheap trick with the quarterstaff and ready herself for combat "Horny, Mage boy... make a good light show for me, aye?"
Tyler K. (GM): Oh, and for a room description
Zared: (Can we intimidate the other goblins?)
Sasha Vashchenko: "I got some cheap jewels to claim for myself!"

Lucia mumbles something to herself about none of them seeming worried.
Tyler K. (GM): Sacks and crates of looted provisions are piled up in the
south end of this large cave_ To the west,the floor slopes
toward a narrow opening that descends into darkness. A
larger opening leads north down a set of natural stone steps,
the roar of falling water echoing from beyond. In the middle
of the cavern, the coals of a large fire smolder.
Icarus: "Oh I've got something ready for a show alright"
Tyler K. (GM): Roll Initiative everyone
Sasha Vashchenko:
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling 4d20
(
9
+
2
+
19
+
20
)
= 50
Zared:
Lucia:
Icarus:
Zared: (So now I can imitidate or no?)
(Or i have to fight?)
Sasha Vashchenko: (Prolly try to intimidate during your own turn)
Tyler K. (GM): Gotta wait your turn
Klarg roars and sends his wolf after the front line fighter
Zared: (Ah ok. I'm learning I'm learning ^^)
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+4
(
3
)+4
= 7
Tyler K. (GM): You manage to block the bite of the wolf with your weapon
You have to wrecnch your pick from his mouth
Zared: (Ok so how do I do that?)
Tyler K. (GM): Strength Check
(To GM) rolling d20+1
(
12
)+1
= 13
Zared:
Tyler K. (GM): You just barely rip it from his jaws, and the wolf moves back
Tensing up for another attack
Zared: "I met your siblings puppy. They had a bigger bite."
Tyler K. (GM): The other goblin, in a scared voice, manages to choke out a "F-FOR KLARG"
As he rushes Sasha
(To GM) rolling d20+4
(
17
)+4
= 21
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling 1d6+2
(
2
)+2
= 4
Tyler K. (GM): He manages to get a cutting blow to your right shoulder
Take four damage
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ach..." The blade cuts and open the previous wound she had "I could use a patch up, Horny..."
Tyler K. (GM): Sasha
You're up
Sasha Vashchenko: She answers the violence of the goblin in kind, slamming the quarterstaff and feeding it a knuckle sandwich
"Not my day..." She says, giving a slightly worried smile
Tyler K. (GM): The goblin lets out a nervous laugh as he steps to the side of both blows, slightly losing balance, but managing to steady himself
Lucia

Lucia steps a bit forward, looking at the goblin, the wounded Sasha, and the bugbear, and decides the bugbear is the biggest worry of the 3.
Lucia:
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+2
(
17
)+2
= 19
Tyler K. (GM): The bugbear manages to step out of the way of the brunt of the attack, patting at the singed fur on his ear
Lucia: (And that's it)
Tyler K. (GM): The left guard with the crossbow fires into the fray, trying to aim for the tiefling cleric
(To GM) rolling d20+4
(
12
)+4
= 16
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d6+2
(
6
)+2
= 8
Tyler K. (GM): he manages to hit you in the leg, take 6 damage
Sasha Vashchenko: "Really need your big spells guys... don't hold back..."
Lucia: (Wow, armor is really doing me no good here)
Tyler K. (GM): (it was a really good roll)
(just getting unlucky
Zared
Icarus: "I would but you're a little in the way for the big guns, less I can slip through"
((how does AOO work in 5e?
I can't say slip through everyone to get to the boss can I?))
Tyler K. (GM): (aoo?)
Sasha Vashchenko: (Attack of opportunity)
Tyler K. (GM): (there are no rules for firing into melee in 5E i think)
Lucia: (But moving through threatened squares?)
Tyler K. (GM): Gobbo and wolf would get AOO
Icarus: (Thought as much)
Zared: watches all of this infighting go down and decides that he'll let his orc side take over again. Bellowing out a booming orc roar that knocked the dust off of all the furniture in his imeditate vicinity
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20-2
(
10
)-2
= 8
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20-1
(
10
)-1
= 9
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20-1
(
9
)-1
= 8
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20-1
(
19
)-1
= 18
Tyler K. (GM): Everyone but the bugbear seems to be unnerved by the presence of this half-orc berserker
"HAH"
"PUNY MORTAL"
"YOU THINK YOU SCARE KLARG"
"DESTROYER OF LANDS"
"PILLAGER OF EMPIRES"
Tyler K. (GM): "KING OF THE FORESTS!"
Sasha Vashchenko: "I swear ta the bitch queen if I ain't claiming your head by the end of the day I will never forgive meself..."
Icarus: (It be way too suicidal to take two aoos then stand in front of the boss practically with a sign saying "come at me bro")
"This one is pretty full of himself isn't he?"
Zared: "Good. You're too stupid to run. But...Goblins. You've seen what he's done to your friend and if you run now you'll see what we won't do to you. Take your pet and scarm." /me would then eye each of the creatures as if daring them to test him
Tyler K. (GM): Klarg Laughs And takes a swig of some putrid looking ale while commanding his goblins from his stool
"THE GREAT AND MIGHTY KLARG COMMANDS YOU TO KEEP FIGHTING"
Icarus
Your turn
Zared: "I give you the choose to live through this. Think hard about this."

Icarus chucks a fire bolt at the Bugbear unafraid of pissing it off
Icarus:
(man what is with these shit damage roll? it a d10 for crying out loud)
Tyler K. (GM): The bolt hits the bugbear in his chest
"OH, SO THE MAGIC MAN WANTS TO FIGHT THE GREAT, AND MIGHTY, AND RUGGEDLY HANDSOME KLARG"
:"BE CAREFUL WHEN PLAY WITH FIRE, MAGIC MAN"
The wolf tries to take a big bite of half orc
Sasha Vashchenko: "Is... that all the magic ye have boys?"
Icarus: "I've got more than fire back here, just wait until my friends clean up your mutt and your soldier"
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+4
(
12
)+4
= 16
Icarus: "Like I said you're in the way right now, if I can get close to him I can really let loose"
Tyler K. (GM): The bite manages to glance off your chestpiece
(To GM) rolling d20+4
(
10
)+4
= 14
Tyler K. (GM): The goblin throws himself at you Sasha

Zared stares at the wolf "Why haven't you picked this pup up yet? Do you really want to die?"
Tyler K. (GM): He misses as you step to the side, gripping an injured shoulder
Sasha Vashchenko: "I am getting pissed off here..."
Tyler K. (GM): Sasha
Sasha Vashchenko:
(These rolls)
"I... I can't see too well..."
Tyler K. (GM): The goblin seems to be getting more and more cocky as the blood loss seems to be getting to your head
Lucia

Lucia is still pretty sure the bugbear is the only thing holding these goblins together, and so continues focusing on him, trying to hold her shield more ready for another arrow.
Lucia:
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+2
(
20
)+2
= 22
Tyler K. (GM): The bugbear manages to get out of the way of the majority of the spell
He breaks his character for a second, as he screams trying to put out the fire on his leg
He quickly and frustratedly recovers
"WHAT DID THE GREAT, AND MIGHTY, AND POWERFUL KLARG SAY ABOUT FIRE, HORN LADY"

Lucia sums up a bit of courage to try and shout out "The bugbear is just a coward braggart!"
Tyler K. (GM): The goblin tries taking a shot at Icarus

Zared in a low hush tone "Good job!"
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+4
(
20
)+4
= 24
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d6+2
(
6
)+2
= 8
Tyler K. (GM): The goblin misses, and manages to hit the wolf near Zared in the fray
Klarg glares angrily at the goblin
"WHY YOU HURT RIPPER PUNY GOBLIN"
"THE MIGHTY AND POWERFUL KLARG WILL SMASH YOU"

Icarus holds back a giggle
Tyler K. (GM): Zared
Your turn
Zared: would then swing his warpick down aiming for 'Ripper's mid body area
Tyler K. (GM): Roll Damage
Zared:
Tyler K. (GM): The Wolf Cries out in Pain
Zared: (I thought I missed)
Tyler K. (GM): You stick it in the ribs as the wolf collapses on the ground
Klarg cries out from the fireplace
"RIPPER, NO"
"YOU HURT RIPPER"
"KLARG WILL KILL YOU"
"KLARG WILL..."
Tyler K. (GM): Klarg looks around thinking
Zared: "Sorry Ripper. Your goblin masters choose wrong." me/ would then pull his pick out of the poor dog's ribs
Tyler K. (GM): "THE GREAT, AND POWERFUL, AND TACTICALLY GENIUS KLARG WILL RETREAT AND CONSIDER BETTER OPTIONS"
Icarus: "What"
"What a coward"
Zared: "...I'd avenge my dog if some asshole killed him."
Tyler K. (GM): "GUARDS, YOU HAVE SERVED KLARG WELL, YOU MUST COVER THE GREAT, AND MIGHTY, AND REGALLY ELEGANT KLARG'S MASTERFUL RETREAT"
Lucia: "H-He's just leaving you to die! A-After he killed one of the other goblins!"
Tyler K. (GM): He attempts to climb down the shaft
Zared: "I wouldn't serve anyone who did that to me."
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+2
(
3
)+2
= 5
Sasha Vashchenko: "That implies that if they didn't serve that idiot we would let them live..." She comments, spitting some blood onto the ground
Tyler K. (GM): The great and mighty klarg falls down the shaft
(To GM) rolling 3d6
(
2
+
3
+
5
)
= 10
Zared: "I gave them a choice."
Tyler K. (GM): You hear something snap as he lands hard on the rock in the kennel
Icarus: "I mean we might"
Tyler K. (GM): And growls and barks from the wolves there
Sasha Vashchenko: "We would've if they didn't raid caravans for a livin'"
Icarus: "Please tell me that idiot didn't just snap his own neck trying to escape"
Sasha Vashchenko: "We're still fightin, think we should focus on the matter at hand"
Tyler K. (GM): Icarus
Your turn
Lucia: "W-Wait a second.."
Icarus: "Yeah yeah, pair of goblins big whoop"

Icarus casually lobs another fire bolt at the goblin crossbowman
Icarus:
Tyler K. (GM): (: ^ )
)
You hit the goblin, but it doesn't seem to do much
Icarus: "Reconsider your situation as you pat yourself off goblin" said in goblin
Tyler K. (GM): The friebolt glances his arm and disapeers into the campfire
Zared: "The hell was that?
Lucia: "H-Hey, I said to wait a second!"
Icarus: (seriously what is that the third maybe forth 1-2 on the d10?)
Tyler K. (GM): The other Goblin looks around
Icarus: "The hell was what?"
Tyler K. (GM): "K-Klarg?"
He tries to swipe at Sasha
Zared: "I didn't understand any of that...Was that some spell or something?
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+4
(
13
)+4
= 17
Icarus: "Oh no I speak goblin, picked it up a few years back"
Tyler K. (GM): You manage to dodge out of the way of the schimitar, but just barely
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ugh... I tire of you, just die already!"
Tyler K. (GM): Sasha
Sasha Vashchenko: She just goes wild
(I didn't roll higher than 11 on my attack rolls today)
Tyler K. (GM): Your quarterstaff attack is parried, but you manage to get a jab in during a window of oppritunity
Sasha Vashchenko:
(And a nat one, jesus christ)
Tyler K. (GM): The goblin clutches his chest hard
Lucia
It is your turn

Lucia grumbles something about people not listening to her and instead tries to slip past the goblin to cast at the bugbear again, hoping that they might not want to attack the one that's been seemingly trying to advocate for them.
Tyler K. (GM): The bugbear is out of sight
He's somewhere in the room, down the shaft
Sasha Vashchenko: "Lucia, where are you going? Get back, you're gonna get hurt!"
Lucia: (I can't see down the shaft?)
Tyler K. (GM): Its straight down
And you're not close enough
Icarus: "She can fend for herself I assume"
Zared: "She's killed more than you. I'm sure she'll do just fine on her own."
Lucia: (And I'm assuming both the ally and the body were difficult terrain so I can't really move more?)
(Also I'm guessing I would have provoked an AoO moving past the goblin if it wanted to take it)
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+4
(
13
)+4
= 17
Tyler K. (GM): It doesn't land
Do ya thang

Lucia rather than attacking at that point, she just continues trying to be the good person and talk the goblins into surrendering. "D-Do you really want to keep fighting for a thing that abandoned you?"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ugh.. Lucia these things predate on innocent people... do you really want to spare this kind of vermin?"
Tyler K. (GM): roll persuasion
Lucia: "We should at least give them a chance.."
Sasha Vashchenko: "After they already killed people?"
Lucia: (Holy crap)
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20-2
(
7
)-2
= 5
Sasha Vashchenko: She sighs "This is just... unholy..."
Tyler K. (GM): The Goblin considers his options
Zared: (It's horns. You can't resist the horns)
Tyler K. (GM): He seems to be lowering his crossbow...

Lucia stares down the other three. "A-And if they do surrender, we aren't going to kill them."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Sure, whatever, let me feel guilty when the next clan o' goblins kill a kid..." She sighs, defeated
Tyler K. (GM): The other goblin doesn't seem to take the speech to heart
Zared: "Look. I just wanted that damn Klarg to pay for killing his own. Bastards like that don't get to live. If these goblins wanna run they can."
Tyler K. (GM): Either it didn't hear in the fray, or simply ignored it
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ye didn't know about Klarg until earlier... an hour ago... less than hour ago!"
Tyler K. (GM): Zared
Sasha Vashchenko: "You seriously want to spare them just because oh poor things found someone meaner than them?"
"They kill people, raid the roads, how do you think they filled this room with goods?"
"Through hard honest work?"
"How many wives are missing their husbands because o' 'em?"
Zared: *would simply turn over the other goblin and smile at it. His tusk shine brightly but he had the murderous air about him "But Klarg made you do those things right? You wouldn't ever do any of those things right?"
Lucia: "A-And what if they're just doing what that bugbear orders because they fear for their own lives? W-What if they would turn around if they had the chance?"
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20-2
(
15
)-2
= 13
Tyler K. (GM): He fails to notice the intimidation attempt
Icarus
Icarus: (Are the goblins wearing metal armor?)
Sasha Vashchenko: "They are goblins, they don't even know what farming or gathering means, they just kill, predate, steal and consume!"
"It's like trying to make a deal with a devil or asking a wish of a genie and expecting anything good ta come out from it!"
"Gah, wha'ever! If this thing attacks me again I am biting its head off, you're warned!"
Tyler K. (GM): (you can chose to do non-lethal with bludgeoning btw)

Icarus takes a step forward casts shocking grasp and gives the nearby goblin a good shove
Icarus:

Zared sighs as looks over at the horned woman "You can't save them all. This one is ready to die for the thing"
Icarus:
Tyler K. (GM): Are you trying to kill him or subdue him?
Icarus: (Kill)
Tyler K. (GM): You Grab the Goblin's head and it goes down in convulsive shocks
Its crudely painted armor scrapes its paint against the ground
Icarus: "Your friend here is barbecued archer, this'll be your last chance to give up" also spoken in goblin
Tyler K. (GM): The goblin stands down
Zared: "That is really creepy sounding coming from you."
Tyler K. (GM): "P-Please, don't hurt Czit"
Shoulder Devil: "Ugh... Czit your name?"
Tyler K. (GM): "Czit put shoot stick down now"
Sasha Vashchenko: *^
Icarus: "Yeah goblin is a pretty guttural language"
Tyler K. (GM): "Czit is Czit's name"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Alright... listen here buddy..."
"I don't give a flying fuck about your culture, clan or whatever else..."

Lucia and with the last goblin surrendered, she would go to check to see if the bugbear was still there.
Sasha Vashchenko: "If I hear that one of your kin is causing troubles in this region... I will come down to settle it..."
"If I find you there..."
Lucia: (Assuming battle and turn order is done now)
Sasha Vashchenko: "I will slaughter you and all of the goblins I can find around ye, got it?"
Tyler K. (GM): Its not there, you can't see anything, but you don't hear anything from the two wolves either
Lucia: (Even if I moved closer to check?)
Tyler K. (GM): You can see down it
Sasha Vashchenko: "Yer allowed to kill wild animals, for food and skins, that's about it"
Zared: "And I'll be there to help her."
Tyler K. (GM): But you can't see any more than maybe twenty square feet
Sasha Vashchenko: "Now fuck off before I murder you"
Tyler K. (GM): No sign of Klarg or the wolvves
Icarus: "Huh guess he didn't break his neck after all"
Sasha Vashchenko: Knowing full well the bugbear to be gone, she just examines the room for anything deserving to be picked
Tyler K. (GM): roll perception
Sasha Vashchenko:
(AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA)
(Will I ever roll anything good?)

Lucia would go back to the goblin then, checking it over for injury before it left
Tyler K. (GM): You notice a chest tucked away
Most of the goods are just cheap foodstuffs
Sasha Vashchenko: She goes to check the chest then
Tyler K. (GM): Inside the chest you find a small wooden statue, maybe a few inches tall, with a gem tucked in the chest
(also remember why you guys are here)
( and how gobboboy might be useful)
Lucia: (But is he injured?)
Sasha Vashchenko: She pockets the statue, gem and all "Alright, back to look for the merchant then?"
Icarus: (oh right)
Tyler K. (GM): Not much, a bit of singed skin from a stray firebolt
Icarus: "Archer, Czit was it, no hard feelings or anything but your little gang took our employer"
"If you would be so kind could you point us in his direction and I'll promise to spare as many of your friends as I can, waddya say?"
Tyler K. (GM): "I-I'll tell you everything I know"
Icarus: "That a boy"
Tyler K. (GM): "but i don't trust the others" signalling to the people who don't speak goblin
Icarus
He Tells you the following, in Goblin
-There are/were about 20 goblins total her
here*
-The Bugbear that just ran off answers to King Grol, King of the Cragmaw Tribe of Goblins
Tyler K. (GM): -Klarg received a messenger goblin from King Grol a few
days ago. The messenger told him that someone named the
Black Spider was paying the Cragmaws to watch out for the
dwarf Gundren Rockseeker, capture him, and send him and
anything he was carrying back to King Grol. Klarg followed
his orders. Gundren was ambushed and taken along with his
Tyler K. (GM): personal effects, including a map.

Lucia frowns a bit but doesn't argue it, just muttering something under her breath. In infernal rather than common this time.
Tyler K. (GM): The dwarf and his map were delivered to King Grol, as
instructed. The dwarf's human companion is being held in
the "eating cave"

Zared is glancing around the area. He's not particularlly expecting something amazing to be found but keeps an eye out just in case there is something there*
Zared:
Sasha Vashchenko: "So ehy... Horny... think ye can fix my wounds?"

Icarus is nodding and taking this all in
Icarus: "Eating cave that doesn't sound good"
Sasha Vashchenko: "I can't feel my right arm anymore"
"On a scale to one to ten... I think I'm at a four in terms of health, here"
Tyler K. (GM): You find a few healing potions and 110Sp, 600Cp
In a pouch that must have fallen off of Klarg in the frey

Lucia sighs a bit and goes over to Sasha. Despite the fact she's been limping on her injured leg, she casts cure wounds on her.
Lucia:
rolling 1d8
(
2
)
= 2
(So exactly 6 back)
Icarus: (Ty can you make a journal and give it to me? I'd like to keep what he's said as notes)
Sasha Vashchenko: "Thank ye Horny, you're too kind... really, especially towards these vermins... but I suppose the world need dreamers"
Zared: Takes said items off the ground and snickers*"Idiot. Next time do be such a coward." would then take a healing potion out and walk over to the brused fighter "Bottoms up?"
Tyler K. (GM): (will do
Sasha Vashchenko: "Nah, Horny did the deed already... she might use it though"

Zared offers the bottle to horny one then "Lucia...You should drink up. Save your strength for this eating cave that the other mage spoke off."
Lucia: "N-No, wait to see if someone else needs it more first before we're done here..."
Sasha Vashchenko: "I think you an I are the ones that got battered here"

Lucia would go about bandaging her leg to stop the bleeding at least.

Zared would then leave the bottle on the ground next to her "Drink the bottle or Else." he said in the same imitidating voice that he gave the dogs from earlier there was a tiny bit of a playful smile on his face however as he said this.
Zared: (Debating on if I should roll a imtidating roll or not)
Tyler K. (GM): Are you just messing around, or are you actually trying to scare her into drinking it
Sasha Vashchenko: "Look, do yer things, I'll keep guard at the entrance"
Zared: (It's messing around)
Tyler K. (GM): no roll, Lucia can decide what to do
Icarus: "Good chatting with ya, try and stay outta trouble now" he pats the goblin on the shoulder

Lucia frowns, but looks to Icarus. "C-Can you ask if there's anything else in here?"

Icarus relays the information to the others out of earshot of the goblin
Tyler K. (GM): "Czit has told all Czit knows"
"Please, Czit promises to be the best Goblin"
Icarus: "Eh like he said"
Tyler K. (GM): "He will not hurt anyone"
"Czit will go as far away from here"
"And Czit will live a peaceful life"

Lucia nods to the goblin. "Good...Stay out of trouble then, please."
Zared: "Else you meet me and the scary lady again."
Tyler K. (GM): "PLEASE, NO SCARY LADY"
Czit scurries off
His patters disapeer into the distance
Zared: "HAH! You heard that Lucia. Our punching lady is now the scary lady."

Lucia sighs again. "Do we all really have to have nicknames? And does mine really have to be H-Horny..?"
Sasha Vashchenko: She is simply guarding the entrance, as told "Yep, that's what companions at arms do, Horny"
Tyler K. (GM): Alright, i'm gonna take a piss break here
Zared: "But...Since we're all here and we've done this...It might be time for introductions."
Tyler K. (GM): Reconvene in 5-10 minutes
Sasha Vashchenko: (Gotcha)
Icarus: "So let's see including the one we let go that's one, two... six in here, don't know if the one's ouside count but that's still like ten...ish goblins unaccounted for?"
(brb too)
Zared: (Guess I'll go and eat again)
Lucia: "So...there's probably more to the cave then?"
Icarus: (back)
"Maybe, maybe not, the eating cave might be a dining hall of sorts were they're all hanging out"
Tyler K. (GM): (back)
Sasha Vashchenko: (brb, need couple of minutes myself now)
Tyler K. (GM): S'all good
Sasha Vashchenko: (Back, filled a cup of tea)
Icarus: (filled it with what? sugar?)
Sasha Vashchenko: "You guys done in there? We still got work to do"
(Shadap)
Tyler K. (GM): Everyone here?
Zared: (YEP)
Tyler K. (GM): Alright
Zared: "Introductions. I guess I'll start first. My name's Zared.
Icarus: "Let's finish off this place and save Gundren's guard"

Lucia just pockets the healing potion before getting up. "Y-Yeah."

Zared grumbles something about trying to be polite and how it's never a good idea
Sasha Vashchenko: "You'll get my name in a tavern, in front a mug of ale"
"Let's move it now, we aren't here to chit chat"
Icarus: "Names Icarus if haven't got it by now"
Zared: "Thank you.
Tyler K. (GM): How does the party proceed?
Sasha Vashchenko: (Square by square)
Lucia: "U-Um, I'm Lucia if anyone was wondering...Not H-Horny..."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Whatever you say Horny, now stick close"
She moves across the bridge
Zared: would follow behind their fighting leader
Tyler K. (GM): This large cave is divided in half by a ten-foot-high escarpment. A steep natural staircase leads from the lower
portion to the upper ledge. The air is hazy with the smoke of
a cooking fire, and pungent from the smell of poorly cured
hides and unwashed goblins.

Zared whispers behind the scary lady but not enough to wear the others could hear "Hey. Try and make it to the cavern will ya? You haven't been fighting the same since you've gotten in this cave."
Sasha Vashchenko: She peeks around the corner
She also bonks Zared in the head with her quarterstaff, to shut his trap
Tyler K. (GM): You can see six goblins in the main dining area, including one that seems to be the commander of the group
To the south seems to be a human stripped and beaten
He's still alive, but definitely hurt
He's chained up
Sasha Vashchenko: "Got five and a mean one... this time around no talking bullshit, we're going to die if we don't fight properly... got that?"
Zared: *Peers over the one that bonked him still rubbing his head "Y-Yea...I got it. Hit them a little harder than that so we can live alright?"
Tyler K. (GM): The one with the dot is the leader
Sasha Vashchenko: "Alright... on my three..."
(Can we take a surprise round if we just storm in?)
Tyler K. (GM): Yeah, they're just sitting around bullshitting and being evil
Sasha Vashchenko: She will roll initiative then
Tyler K. (GM): Everyone roll
Sasha Vashchenko:
Icarus:
Lucia:
Zared:
Tyler K. (GM): Lucia is the first to act
Thee's enough space to move in the hall
Sasha Vashchenko: (Can they hold their turn?)
Tyler K. (GM): Full movement
If he wants
Sasha Vashchenko: (Oh nevermind then)
(Thought it counted as hard terrain)

Lucia grumbles, but resigns to her small victory of saving one goblin before going in to do her usual spellcasting
Lucia:
Tyler K. (GM): The goblins are shocked as the tiefling bursts in
"INTRUDERS!"
The two goblins are singed as the cooking fire explodes in their faces
Icarus

Icarus sprints forward with a mad look of glee on his face raises his arms to the sky and casts Thunderwave
Icarus:
Lucia: (Two?)
Icarus: (can I use Tides of chaos to roll advantage on that shit damage?)
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling 6d20+2
(
5
+
11
+
4
+
1
+
4
+
9
)+2
= 36
Tyler K. (GM): Yeah
Icarus: 10
(everyone in a 15 foot radius has to roll a con save or take full damage and be pushed back 10 ft)
Lucia: (Soooo is that including allies too?)
Icarus: (think so)
Sasha Vashchenko: (Waaait waaait waait)
Tyler K. (GM): The goblin commander and two of his lackies manage to withstand the blast
Yeah/
?
Sasha Vashchenko: "Each creature in a 15-foot cube originating from you"
(The cubes originate from you, it isn't around you)
(*Cube)
Zared: (Who has to make the con saves?)
Tyler K. (GM): Isn't that the same thing?
Sasha Vashchenko: (No, it basically means that you choose a side and you count a cube directed at that side)
(I remember because one used it in the campaign i co DM)
Icarus: (ah so I could cast it from there?)
Sasha Vashchenko: (Basically like this, I'lls how you)
(Like that
(Or further up)
(Let me see if I can find the page, I remember discussing it once)
Icarus: (why not to the left, that'll hit more)
(wait, no, idk lol)
Tyler K. (GM): do it fagit
Sasha Vashchenko: ( 8
down vote
accepted
No. It is not necessarily centered on the caster (though it can be).
Sasha Vashchenko:
A cube is not a burst power (to borrow a 4e term). The origination point of the cube is anywhere on a face, not necessarily the center. The term face when referring to a cube means the entire square comprising a side.)
(So basically you can be on any part of the cube)
(But you must be in the cube you're casting)
(Something like that could work for example)
Tyler K. (GM): Sasha is right
Sasha Vashchenko: (Or this)
Icarus: (now that's a cube I can get behind)
Sasha Vashchenko: (Or any other square in the cube)
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling 5d20
(
17
+
18
+
13
+
11
+
11
)
= 70
Icarus: "Hahahahahaha! This is what I was waiting for!"
Tyler K. (GM): Three of the Goblins are Killed instantly as powerful magics surge out from you
Two, including the commander, manage to hold onto dear life
Sasha
(To GM) rolling d20+2
(
1
)+2
= 3
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+2
(
9
)+2
= 11
Sasha Vashchenko: The monk rushes forward, to cover for the sorcerer "That was a proper show... but now duck behind me!"
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+2
(
4
)+2
= 6
Sasha Vashchenko: The lashes out at the commander
(These rolls)
Tyler K. (GM): Neither hit manages to connect
Sasha Vashchenko: (I want to roll a 10)
Tyler K. (GM): (also you're standing on a fire
Sasha Vashchenko: (Didn't it explode?)
Tyler K. (GM): Coals are still there
Sasha Vashchenko: (Yeah but I'm a monk)
(I got the whole pain resisting thing against coal)
Tyler K. (GM): I'll let it slide
Icarus: (it would've been blown away by my spell)
Sasha Vashchenko: (^)
Tyler K. (GM): Yeah, Icarus is right
Alright
Either way, they miss
Sasha Vashchenko: (I mean come on)
Icarus: (most things not nailed down would be)
Sasha Vashchenko: (I can't roll a 10, let me get the coal standing)
Tyler K. (GM): Zared
(To GM) rolling 3d20+2
(
16
+
19
+
7
)+2
= 44

Zared would run towards the lead with both of his weapons in hand throwing all of his weight in as he swung at the creature
Zared:
Tyler K. (GM): Neither hits, as the goblin ducks while his hair surges with residual electricity
Zared: "Bastard. You're not the boss for nothing are ya?"
Tyler K. (GM): The Goblin Manages to Slip Away in the frenzied rush
He scutters up the stairs, and grabs hold of the warrior
"EVERYBODY SLOW THE FUCK DOWN"
"NOW YOU'RE GOING TO LISTEN TO ME"
"I KNOW WHO YOU'RE HERE FOR"
Sasha Vashchenko: "We killed the bugbear, drop your weapons and we'll let you go"
Tyler K. (GM): "IF YOU EVEN THINK ABOUT ATTACKING ME, I'M GOING TO DROP THIS BASTARD DOWN THE LEDGE"
The Human Groggily opens his mouth
"d-don't trust anything he says"
The Goblin slaps him across the mouth
"SHUT IT. NOW, YOU'RE GOING TO DROP YOUR FUCKIN WEAPONS, AND ME AND MY BOYS ARE GOING TO WALK OUT OF HERE"
Zared: "Half of you guys have just become a roasted meal. And another one is halfway there."
Tyler K. (GM): "OR THIS GUY'S GOING FOR A BIT OF A FALL"
He holds SIldar precariously over the edge
Sasha Vashchenko: "Except we can heal him"
Icarus: "Technically we're here for the dwarf, rescuing the guard was just a courtesy"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Here is my question"
Zared: "I expect extra for it too."
Sasha Vashchenko: "If we harm you"
"Who's going to heal you?"
"Now from my point of view, if you drop the human, I will break your neck"
Tyler K. (GM): The goblin looks around nervously
Sasha Vashchenko: "Instead, if you drop your weapons like... Czit, was it? Like the other goblinoid that did the same... we'll let you go"
"If you promise not to fuck around with civilized people anymore"
"Otherwise we come back and feed you your own testicles"
Tyler K. (GM): Roll to intimidate
Zared: "She will do it too."
Sasha Vashchenko: (I am not trying to intimidate, that's just what is going to happen)
Tyler K. (GM): I mean, you're trying to scare him into standing down
Sasha Vashchenko: (It's more explaining what it's going to happen, rather than trying to scare him)
(But I'll roll it)
Tyler K. (GM): Its mostly to see how effectively he listened
Sasha Vashchenko: (Man, a 17)
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20
(
4
)
= 4
Sasha Vashchenko: (i feel blessed)
Tyler K. (GM): He considers his options
He looks to Sildar
He looks at the three dead goblins
Lucia: (Talking is obviously the way to do things. I got a 19 on my persuasion before)
Sasha Vashchenko: (But I want to kill people)
Tyler K. (GM): He looks down the ledge
"Ugh, damn it"
He sets sildar down on the ledge
"Boys, its over"
"They've got a wizard"
Icarus: "Good choice, I'm glad to see I didn't fry your brains"
Sasha Vashchenko: "You're lucky we got Horny, otherwise I would've wiped you all"
"Now fuck off before I change idea"
Zared: "You've got about five seconds."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Starting a minute ago"
Tyler K. (GM): The three living goblins scurry off
Sasha Vashchenko: She approaches Slidar "Oi, Greenie, Horny, bring the potions, might need them here" She then turns to Slidar "How you're holding up, berk?"
Icarus: "Woo that was fun"

Lucia goes up to check on the prisoner guy after giving Sasha a 'seriously?' look.
Sasha Vashchenko: "What? What did I do?"
She tsks a couple of times "There is no pleasing you Horny... fitting for your name, really.."
Tyler K. (GM): The Grizzled, Aging Warrior Wearily lifts his head
"I've been better"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Younger too, I bet" She chuckles

Zared simplys walk up to the prisoner while snickering the entire time with a health potion in his hand "H-Heh...Good. Drink up so you can be better then that."
Sasha Vashchenko: "We cleared the cave, should be safe now"
Tyler K. (GM): He lets out a hearty chuckle that turns into coughs
Sasha Vashchenko: "Alright, tell us what happened, I think we got a spare minute or two"

Zared would then gently bring the bottle to his mouth "Drink first. I don't need you coughing while explaining your screw up."
Tyler K. (GM): He Gulps down the potion

Icarus lies down and splays out on the floor still catching his breath a bit

Lucia sighs at the comment, but grabs the potion she had pocketed earlier. Or she'll just untie the guy and make sure nothing is seriously wrong with him.
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling 2d4+2
(
2
+
1
)+2
= 5
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling 2d4+2
(
2
+
3
)+2
= 7
Tyler K. (GM): The two potions pick him right up
The wounds and lashes are still visible, but he seems to be able to stand under his own power
"Right. I'm not sure how long it's been, but me and Gundren were riding down the road, when these little bastards swarmed us"
Sasha Vashchenko: "What about Gundren? He's dead?"
Tyler K. (GM): "Gundar was on his way to Phandalin, talking about he and his brothers having found a secret entrance to some place called Wave Echo Cave, he explained that it was the entrance to the old abandoned mines in the area"
Icarus: "Not dead, just taken"

Icarus hops up and moves to the others
Tyler K. (GM): He Explains what Gundren Told him: More than five hundred years ago, clans of dwarves and
gnomes made an agreement known as the Phandelver's
Pact, by which they would share a rich mine in a wondrous
cavern known as Wave Echo Cave. In addition to its
mineral wealth, the mine contained great magical power.
Human spellcasters allied themselves with the dwarves
Tyler K. (GM): and gnomes to channel and bind that energy into a great
forge (called the Forge of Spells), where magic items could
be crafted. Times were good, and the nearby human town
of Phandalin (pronounced fan-duh-lin) prospered as well.
But then disaster struck when ores swept through the
North and laid waste to all in their path.
Tyler K. (GM): A powerful force of ores reinforced by evil mercenary
wizards attacked Wave Echo Cave to seize its riches and
magic treasures. Human wizards fought alongside their
dwarf and gnome allies to defend the Forge of Spells, and
the ensuing spell battle destroyed much of the cavern.Few survived the cave-ins and tremors, and the location of
Wave Echo Cave was lost.
Tyler K. (GM): (ores should be orcs)
Sasha Vashchenko: (By the way, using /desc helps with the format)
Tyler K. (GM): danke
Sasha Vashchenko: (As a DM you should basically always use it)
"Uhn... that's a pretty story... so... I assume we're not going to get payed for this, are we?"
This is a test
Tyler K. (GM): "I'll make sure you get your gold, when we get to town, but I do need help locating Gundren"
"I overheard these bastards talking, Klarg had orders from someone to capture Gundren. Some bloke named "The Black Spider"
Zared: "We get extra for saving him. We weren't supposed to end up in this damp smelly cave."
"That was your screw up. Not ours."
Tyler K. (GM): "Aye, I'll make a note of it"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Eh... I would agree with the greenie... but seems like this thing might blown on our faces if left unchecked, regardless of being payed or not, innit?"
"Don't want to be responsible for innocents getting gutted because the pay wasn't high enough, I'll help as long, seems what an adventuring kind of thing, aye?"
Tyler K. (GM): "The Gobbo Bastards took Gundar's Map, and I thinks the sent it to their chief, some place called Cragmaw Castle"
Lucia: "Didn't the goblin before say the same thing?"
Sasha Vashchenko: "First and foremost, we could really use some rest and some supplies for anything we're going to do"
Tyler K. (GM): "Don't know where it might be, but I bet someone in town might, they've been dealing with the little buggers enough"
Icarus: "Yeah though he didn't give us a location"
Tyler K. (GM): "Now, I wasn't here to just watch over Gundren"
"He's a good friend, but there was another reason I came out this way"
"I was sent by The Lord's Alliance to meet a contact here, some bloke named Iarno Albrek"
"We haven't recieved word from him in months, so they sent me down to investigate"
"He was supposed to restore order around here, but he went radio silent"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Gee, I wonder what could've possibly happened..."
(Radio silent')
Zared: "So why's this Larno Bloke important besides just keeping order around her?
Sasha Vashchenko: (Kek)
Tyler K. (GM): (SPELL WAVE SILENT)
Lucia: (Good job)
Sasha Vashchenko: "Now, I ain't complaining here... well actually, I am"
"Can't we finish discussing this inside a inn or something?"
"Maybe after a bath?"
Tyler K. (GM): "Aye, and I'll get you you're money
Sasha Vashchenko: (You're)
Tyler K. (GM): Fuck off i'm tired
Lucia: (You are money)
Sasha Vashchenko: (Oh I'm sorry dear)
(Is it 5AM where you live?)
Tyler K. (GM): Maybe
Zared: would then sniff his arm pit and snort away "I petted those dogs for too long I smell like a wet one now."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Aye aye, let's go, I really need to shake away all this bad luck that is afflicting me"
Tyler K. (GM): "Fifty Gold for the Each of Yeh on top of the delivery Fee"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Sounds mighty delicious, now let's move it"
Icarus: "Sounds good to me"
Tyler K. (GM): "Then It's a deal"
The five of you exit the cave and make your way down the goblin trail
You find the cart well hidden amongst the trees and all of its supplies untouched
You load everyone on the wagon, and set off for Phandalin, making it just before nightfall
And I'm cutting the session here
Sasha Vashchenko: No you're not
Give me the XP
Tyler K. (GM): Give me a sec fam
Icarus: (lol)
Lucia: (Also, would I be able to make another healing potion on the trip?)
Shoulder Devil: Man today
I could've rolled with a 1d6
Tyler K. (GM): You don't have the regents with you
Shoulder Devil: Would have achieved the same results
Lyei H.: Isn't an herbalism kit all I need?
Tyler K. (GM): And each of you get 275 XP
Shoulder Devil: 350
Tyler K. (GM): Should be enough to get to second level
Shoulder Devil: Wait so quickly?
Tyler K. (GM): party poppers
Congratulations
You did it
Good Job
I'm proud of you
Shoulder Devil: I'll take 5 for my hit dice
Which adds up to 7 with con modifier
Really what's the point of rolling if I can take 5 out of 8
Icarus: (Indeed it is enough, sweet, I think now I can take the careful casting feat and avoid killing the party with muh speels :D)
Tyler K. (GM): There's not enough time on the road to do it
Plus its bumpy and shit
Don't want stuff spilling or exploding
Lyei H.: Well fine
Tyler K. (GM): There's rules for it in the DMG, but it takes like 4 days or something
Shoulder Devil: And now
I have a speed of 50
Gotta go fast
Lyei H.: And now I have more spells and more healing
Tyler K. (GM): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BM35d979zy0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_8_vZMYOFaE
We did it guys
Shoulder Devil: I got flurry of blows, finally
4 attacks per round
All under 10
Tyler K. (GM): You have to spend a Ki point though right?
Lyei H.: Jeez
Shoulder Devil: Yeah but if I roll like I did today
I could roll 40 attacks per round
And still be useless
SERIOUSLY
I DIDN'T HIT JACKSHIT
Oh well, either way
Shoulder Devil: Good night and all of that, catch up with you next week and stuff
Tyler K. (GM): Alright
Well
I'm done for the night
I gotta go study calculus and shit
William D.: Calculus is for nerds
Lyei H.: I'll take 5 on my HP too
William D.: 2
Tyler K. (GM): Alright, roll call
Lyei H.: Hi
Rex S.: Made it
Icarus: (Check it)
Sasha Vashchenko: "Da"
Tyler K. (GM): Alright
So
LAST TIME
ON
GAME
CAVE
Tyler K. (GM): GOBLINS
BUGBEAR
DEAD GOBLINS
WARRIOR
Now
Remember, you learned:
Tyler K. (GM): Where Gundren has been taken
Why Sildar is here in Phandalin
And what Gundren was doing
Does anyone need a primer on any of these?
Sasha Vashchenko: (Where's our reward?)
Tyler K. (GM): We're getting to that Sasha
Sasha Vashchenko: (Is the Sleeping Giant a inn?)
(If so, is it more expensive than the Stonehill Inn?)
Icarus: (I hope so)
(That it's an inn I mean)
The rutted track emerges from a wooded hillside, and you
Tyler K. (GM): catch your first glimpse of Phandalin. The town consists of
forty or fifty simple log buildings, some built on old fieldstone
foundations. More old ruins-crumbling stone walls covered
in ivy and briars-surround the newer houses and shops,
showing how this must have been a much larger town in
centuries past. Most of the newer buildings are set on the
Tyler K. (GM): sides of the cart track, which widens into a muddy main
street of sorts as it climbs toward a ruined manor house on a
hillside at the east side of town.
As you approach, you see children playing on the town green
and townsfolk tending to chores or running errands at shops.
Many people look up as you approach, but all return to their
Tyler K. (GM): business as you go by.
Fuck off roll20
Sasha Vashchenko: (You need to do /desc)
Icarus: (Who's Sildar again? the guy we saved?)
Sasha Vashchenko: (For each segment)
Tyler K. (GM): I did and Yes Respectively
The rutted track emerges from a wooded hillside, and you catch your first glimpse of Phandalin. The town consists of forty or fifty simple log buildings, some built on old fieldstone foundations. More old ruins-crumbling stone walls covered
Tyler K. (GM): in ivy and briars-surround the newer houses and shops, showing how this must have been a much larger town in centuries past. Most of the newer buildings are set on the sides of the cart track, which widens into a muddy main street of sorts as it climbs toward a ruined manor house on a hillside at the east side of town. As you approach, you see children playing on the town green and townsfolk tending to chores or running errands at shops.
Many people look up as you approach, but all return to their
business as you go by.
Not doing it again
Sasha Vashchenko: The monk simply keep escorting Sildar, until just a time where she will receiver her reward (I think it needs to be the same line)
Sildar seems much more at ease. "My friends," he says, "let us secure lodgings. I'm told the local inn is very quaint."
Icarus: "Ah what a quaint an quiet little town, aren't places like this just charming?"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Lead the way, I trust yer gonna bring us to a nice place"
He chuckles, "Ah yes, the old Stonehill Inn is one of the finest taverns on the Sword Coast"
Lucia: "It does seem like a pretty nice place.."

Zared stares at the town and smiles brightly "I'll be the judge of that. Only good way to know a good tavern is the ale. " would then pull out a sack that sounded as if it was full of currency "And I plan on getting as much ale I can get!"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Wavin' 'round yer coin pouch is a quick way to misplace it, bud"
Zared: "True but you and me alone can take out anyone that trys to misplace right?"
Icarus: "In a place like this? Naaaaaahh"
Tyler K. (GM): You arrive at the inn Situated at the center of town. It seems a deal newer than the other buildings, but still feels as if it has seen its fair years.
The Common Room is filled with locals nursing mugs of ale and cider
Icarus: "This isn't some dark and grimy city street, full of misfits and scoundrels"
Tyler K. (GM): Sildar Speaks Up from the Wagon
Sasha Vashchenko: "Only if we spot 'em first, hard ta beat up someone that already ran away" She scratches her chin, then nods "Yer right mage boy, still, ye never know"
Lucia: "Do places really get that bad?"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ye have no idea horny"
Sildar: "We'll find lodging for the night here. In the morn, I'll head down to the exchange office to secure a loan to pay you for your services"
"First, I'd suggest delivering these goods to Barthen once you all get settled"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Don't we need a document or something for that?"
Icarus: "Some parts of cities can be real rough, beggars faking lameness, crews set up to rob you blind, wily types trying to hauk trashy wares"
Sildar: "Ah shite, I suppose so. Hmmm..."
Zared: "You don't usually do things like this do Sildar?"
Sildar: "I'll get something to write on in the inn"
Icarus: "Ya can't blame him he was just the muscle after all"
Sildar: "No, lad, the Order doesn't usually have me running errands, but I had to find a way to roll through here without raising too many eyebrows"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ah well, let's get us some rooms and some drinks, we can settle this business later, cart ain't going to suddently rot over the next hour or two"
Tyler K. (GM): (Remember that Sildar is looking for the Order member and Wizard Iarno Albrek)
The sweet smokey smell of tobacco and booze fill the air as you walk into the common room, backlit by a setting sun giving everything a pinkish glow.
A fire roars and commoners chat about town gossip, and a short young human male cleans glasses at a bar counter
Sasha Vashchenko: She smirks "This place is actually pretty neat!" She says, while approaching the human at the counter "Ey lad, how much for a room and a pint of mead?"

Zared would take it all in with quite the smile on his face being shown "Ah! Now that's this is more like it. Ale and food. The sooner I get that the better.!"
He turns around and his face lights up
Toblen Stonehill: "Ah Travellers, we haven't gotten such a big group in some time!"
Icarus: "Indeed we'll have our work cut out for us coming forward, best get our fill while we can"
Toblen Stonehill: "Well, we have six of the finest rooms on the Storm Coast, and we charge a nightly rate of a modest five silver a night"
"In addition, we serve some of the finest ale you'll ever fine, for a measly five copper a mug"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Uhn... how 'bout rooms for two, how much do they cost?"
He raises an eyebrow and chuckles
Sasha Vashchenko: "Just thinkin' of splitting the price here, don't go getting strange thoughts, lad"
Toblen Stonehill: "Well, we don't charge any extra for anyone Under three people a room"
Sildar pipes in
Sasha Vashchenko: "Uhn... I could sleep alongside horny, while mage boy, greenie and Sil can sleep in another"
"Could split the price that way, innit?"
Sildar: "Now, I'm fond of you laddies, but Sildar needs his beauty sleep, and no offense to the sorcerer, but I don't want to be turned into a chicken while I sleep"
"I'll secure my own lodgings for now"
Icarus: "None taken"
Sasha Vashchenko: She shrugs "Horny, watcha think, comfortable enough with sleeping alongside the scary woman or shall I get me own room?"
Lucia: "I guess that would be fine...I'm sort of used to sleeping around others anyways."
Sasha Vashchenko: She snickers
"Really now?"

Lucia goes a bit red in the face. "W-What?"
Sasha Vashchenko: She fetches 2 silver coins and five coppers "Alright, this is my share for the room then, Horny fill the rest... also I heard ye on the ale but whatabout mead? Got any?"
Toblen Stonehill: "Don't get many mead drinkers around here, but I bet I can find a barrel or two in the back"

Lucia digs up her portion then, still red in the face.
Icarus: "So Z you wanna share a room or are you afraid I'll cast fire bolt in my sleep too?" said with a cheery but sarcastic tone
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ain't much of a drinker but I enjoy it over ale, also what's on the menu? I could eat a horse"
"If possible, cooked"
Toblen lets out a laugh
Toblen Stonehill: "Well, we don't offer horse here, but we do have a delicious roasted pork on special tonight"

Zared snickers at the mages words "Heh I'm not goblin so I think I'll manage. If you don't mind a green guy sleeping in the same room as you." he end with a playful nudge
Toblen Stonehill: "I can let Agnus in the back know to cut you some off"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Tell me ye got potatoes as well and I'm going to flick several golden your way"
Toblen Stonehill: "Finest Golden Spuds in this or any land"
Sasha Vashchenko: She fetches up five gold coins and place them on the counter "Ye just bring me mead, meat and potatoes until I pass out, keep the rest as tip"
Toblen Stonehill: "I think you've got yourself a deal" he says, eyeing and biting the coins to confirm their legitimacy
Icarus: "Not at all"

Icarus slams a gold coin down on the counter "That's for my half of the room plus let's get a tab running for the food and ale"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ehy Horny, ever tried mead? Or alcohol in general, truth to be told ye look too pure for that kind 'o stuff"
Lucia: "I have occasionally...Just not very much...Or very often..."
Sasha Vashchenko: "So precious and fragile"

Zared would then toss five gold pieces of his own at the bar table "That's my share and don't stop still I pass out and mage boy has to bring me up to my room!" he said with a toothy grin
The Bartender sets down his glass and cloth and beckons you to follow. He says,
Toblen Stonehill: "Oh and, I'll have someone go out and tie up your cargo for now"
"No sense in getting it stolen, specially nowadays"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Why nowadays? Got troubles as of late?"
Toblen Stonehill: "Ah its nothin, just some hooligans who rolled in with the miners"
"They can be a nuisance, but we keep our heads high"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Let's hope they won't bother us then, I already broke enough skulls for today"
Lucia: "It would be nice to be able to get some rest anyways.."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Aye... oh do you have bath or bathouses here?"
"I would not mind to clean myself from the grime of the road"
Zared: "Gotta agree with the lady. That cave smelled almost as bad as it looked."
Toblen Stonehill: "Aye, Aye, we have a two baths, mens and womens let me get my wife to draw you up some hot water"
Icarus: "Sounds great"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Wonderful"
Tyler K. (GM): The day is setting, but you still seem to have time to visit one or two places on the map
Sasha Vashchenko: Sasha wishes to visit the shrine and the woodworker before going to catch zzzs
Tyler K. (GM): Sildar pays Toblen for a writing utensil and some parchment and writes out a letter of affirmation for the goods
Icarus: "What's a Lionshield Coster?"
Tolben looks up from trying to unlock your room door and gives a smile
Tyler K. (GM): "Ah, the local trading company, he's to the southwest of here, he'll get you nice and fitted, but they might have hung everything up for the night"
Sasha Vashchenko: "What 'bout the woodworker? Does it make weapons?"
Icarus: "Noted"
Sasha Vashchenko: "And the shrine of luck? What god is it build for?"
Icarus: "You might want to try the smithy for that Sasha"
Toblen Stonehill: "Linene is a good gal, even if she's got that high strung city attitude"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Smithy works with metal, I ain't lookin' for metal"
Toblen Stonehill: "They mostly do carpentry, sorry lass"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ah shame"
Toblen Stonehill: "The Lionshields aren't no armory, they ship in all their goods"
(smithy*)
Zared: "I saw a redhouse earlier not too far from here. What's the deal with that place?"
Toblen Stonehill: (where are you talking about Zared)
Zared: (Bartheren's provisions)
Toblen Stonehill: "Ah yes. Say, you must be the escorts Barthen's been waiting for. Caravans have stopped coming through here from the Triboar, been harder and harder to get provisions through her"
"Lucky you guys got through huh?" He says, laughing
Icarus: "Sure, luck"

Zared simply nods with his arms crosses and a few stiffled laughs along the way
Lucia: "H-Hopefully that problem should be solved now."
Sasha Vashchenko: "We had to take a small detour to kill goblins, however we managed just fine, ye"
Toblen Stonehill: "Oh yeah? Well, I'm sure the Townmaster will be thankful, you can find him at the Townmaster's Hall, sure won't find him out in the streets..."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ain't getting too late for that? 'Sides, I'd rather eat and drink for tonight, we can handle all that stuff tomorrow, ye?"
"Unless any of you is keen on rushing ahead and get things done right away"
Icarus: "Nope I"m good to kick back and relax"
Zared: "The thanks is coming either way. So why rush it right?"

Lucia shakes her head a bit. "I'd rather spend some time drinking, eating, and relaxing for now.."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Then... I think we got a long night ahead of us! Let's get a feast going lads, I ain't stopping until I puke!"
Zared: "So after the first drink then?"
Lucia: "T-That seems a bit excessive either way..."
Sasha Vashchenko: She scoffs "I got more hair in me chest than ye have in your balls, buddy"
"Yer out of yer league!"
Toblen Stonehill: Anything Else?
Fuck
Tyler K. (GM): Anything Else

Zared raises a eyebrow at her words "Oh really? You know I was drinking ale and mead when I was twelve right? You're in the presence of champion."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Twelve? Me father fed me rum when I was but an infant, sometimes mixed with shark's blood when I needed a reward!"
Tyler K. (GM): Well
The sunlight fades into night as the candlelight spreads throughout the common room. Townspeople talk and laugh and you caruse and party with them all night long
Tyler K. (GM): While Partying, a few bits of information from the backround gossip manage to penetrate the drunken fog
Lucia, you overhear some information about the keeper of the Shrine of Luck, Sister Garaele left town for a few days a while ago and came back wounded and exhausted earlier that day
Sasha and Zared overhear the assistant barmaid tell stories about the former adventurer who lives out at Edermath Orchard
The sun rises high on a new day, as some of you wake up groggy and tired, but hey, at least you managed to get the smell of goblin blood out of your clothes (mostly)
Sasha Vashchenko: The monk will wake up early in the morning to prepare but will allow Lucia to sleep in, if she didn't wake up yet. She will head down, order something to eat to start the day and then wait for the rest of the group to get ready

Icarus carelessly oversleeps

Lucia does seem to be sleeping in a bit, having drank plenty the night before, but still gets up without too much wasted time.
Zared: sounded more like a giant animal sleeping than a man but it was a peaceful giant animal. So there's that.
Tyler K. (GM): Alright
Sildar saunters into the room with five four pouches gripped in his hands
Sasha Vashchenko: (Five four)
Sildar: "Well, I can't thank you all enough for the help you've been getting me here"
Sasha Vashchenko: "It was nothin', really"
Sildar: "I've got your payment split up into four equal parts"
Sasha Vashchenko: She open her hands, awaiting the payment
Sildar does an underhand toss to each of you as the coins make a satisfying plop in your hands
Icarus: "Much obliged"
Each sac contains fifty gold pieces
Sasha Vashchenko: "Nifty"
Sildar: "The Thanks of the Order of the Lord's Alliance are with you all as well"
Sasha Vashchenko: "So... next step, getting the cart to... don't remember who, then check with the townmaster... then do that thing you told us, ye?"
Sildar nods
Icarus: "Barthen"

Zared caught the bag and smiled at the older gentleman "I'll head for the cart. I doubt the townmaster would want to deal with me directly."
Sildar: "Aye, You all should head over to Barthen's provisions, and deliver his goods, he's been expecting them for a while"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Aye aye, Barthen's, then town, then onward to greatness"
Sildar: "In the meantime, I'm gonna find out just what the hell happened to Iarno"
Icarus: "Good luck with that"
Sildar: "Aye, hopefully he's OK, but months without contact,,, I fear the worst at this point"
"With the bandits, the goblins, and the mines, something hasn't been right around here lately"
He stands up, dusts himself off, and sets his drink down along with his bill
Sildar: "Well, I'll get out of your hair for now"
"Good day to you all"
Sasha Vashchenko: The monk nods and go to Zared, to help him settle the cart and bring it to Barthen's place
Sildar: Is everyone going to Barthen's or are you splitting up?
Fuck
Tyler K. (GM): ^
Lucia: (Good job)
Icarus: (I shall go to Bart Hens)
Sasha Vashchenko: (Probably sticking together)
Zared: (Sticking together)
Sasha Vashchenko: (Since splitting up won't really save time OOC)
Lucia: (Stick together until after we're done?)
Sasha Vashchenko: (Yep)
Tyler K. (GM): Alright
You walk along the roads, and come along the quaint general store with a sign that says "BARTHEN'S PROVISIONS" in bold yellow letters.

Zared whispers "Sasha...Before you fell on your ass. Did you hear about who the barmaid was talking about? Something about a old adventurer in some orchard field or something."
Sasha Vashchenko: "I remember it differently... but ye, something 'bout it, didn't really care much however... maybe this old man might have couple of trinkets for us... or maybe he wants to be left alone..."
She shrugs "Either way, let's take care of this now" She approaches the store, opening the door and looking inside
Zared: follows up behind the woman
As the door opens, you notice an old, thin man dusting the floors, and two young strapping clerks taking stock
Tyler K. (GM): The old man speaks up as the bell above the door rings
Barthen: "Haven't seen you lot around here before, you must be my suppliers!"
"Thank the gods you made it here safe"
he looks around your group, even standing on his tippy toes to try and see
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ye, change of plans though, main man got troubles on the road, goblins got him... got papers ye should read" She explains briefly, handing him the paper given by Sildar
Barthen: "Say, wasn't Gundren supposed to be coming in with you?"
He looks through the papers
Barthen: "hmm"
"Oh"
"Oh my god..."
"Well, we have been having banditry problems, but to think they got to Gundren..."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Goblins, ye... led by a bugbear, as matter of fact"
Zared: "Klarg. That was the bastard's name."
Lucia: "U-Um...Hopefully they're gone now..?"
Barthen: "Luckily his brothers are OK, they should be camping somewhere outside of town. Been a while since they came in, probably running low. Thank god I got some stuff in stock now"

Zared still holds a bit of animosity for the bugbear for his 'leadership' abilities
Icarus: "Yep a real shame about that, but don't worry if he's still alive we'll rescue him, probably, hopefully"
Barthen: "Well I hope you do. Him and his brothers efforts have really brought interest back to this town, for better or for worse"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Either way, we're gonna take the payment in his stead"
Barthen: "Ah yes."
he fishes underneath the counter
Barthen: "Lets see here"
He pulls out ten gold for each of you from a sack of coins as he signals his clerks to start unloading the wagon
Barthen: "Again, I can't thank you enough for this"
Sasha Vashchenko: "This adventuring business is really paying off!" She says pleased, while pocketing the gold "Ye, no problem... now if that is all we got a busy day, so we'll be going to the townmaster, aye?"
Lucia: "We're happy to do what we can to help...A-At least I am."
Barthen: "Ah yes, Harbin's office is a few minutes walk to the south, big bloody building, can't miss it"
Icarus: "Thanks and all that"
Barthen: Yall done here?
FUCK OFF ROLL20
Tyler K. (GM): ^
Fuck
Sasha Vashchenko: (Ye)
Lucia: (Ye)
Icarus: (ye)
Zared: (yep)
Tyler K. (GM): Alright
You take a few minutes walk down the street til you come to a large building with a red roof
Sasha Vashchenko: (Do we still have the cart?9
Tyler K. (GM): No
Sasha Vashchenko: (kk)
The Townmaster's Hall has sturdy stone walls, a pitched wooden roof, and a bell tower at the back. Posted on a board next to the front door is a notice written in Common. It reads: "REWARD-Orcs near Wyvern Tor! Those of a mind to face the orc menace should inquire within." The notice bears the town's seal and an indecipherable signature.
Sasha Vashchenko: "Interesting..." She comments, then heads inside
Icarus: "Oh that definitely sounds up our alley"

Lucia just looks at the rest of the group for their reactions to the notice before following them inside

Zared glares at the poster for a brief moment "....Right..."
A clerk with glasses scrolls away at a desk, pouring over reports. She looks up from her work to eye the Monk, the Half Orc w, the Tiefling in Cleric Robes, and the Human Sorcerer
she rolls her eyes a bit
Tyler K. (GM): "Townsmaster's office, can I help you?
Icarus: (Imma half-elf bro)
change that shit to half elf
half elf sorcerer
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ye, wanted to report the killing of some goblins, a rogue bugbear that leads the little shit and was interested in hearing for the rewards on the orcs"
Zared: "The bugbear's name was Klarg."
Tyler K. (GM): She glances up from her glasses
"Please Hold"
She finishes her line of accounting and knocks on the door behind her
a muffled voice can be heard from the back
Tyler K. (GM): "Who is it?" a groggy voice asks
Sasha Vashchenko: "Just an adventuring party"
Zared: "And we want to help with those orcs" he'd shout
you hear some things being knocked over and a heavy scraping of a chair against the floor as heavy footsteps make their way to the door
The door opens and a fat, old man who looks like he just woke up steps out
Tyler K. (GM): "Hmm? Ah, you must be the adventurers who took care of our little goblin problem. Your friend Sildar stopped by an hour or so ago and let me know"
"I don't believe we've been properly introduced! I am Harbin Wester, Townmaster of Phandalin!"
He extends a hand that is covered in grease from whatever food is smelling up the room behind you before quickly retracting it to wipe it on his pants
Sasha Vashchenko: "Sasha Vashchenko, pleased ta metcha..." She refrains from shaking hands, on the account she just had a bath the day prior

Lucia would pause a bit at the hand wiping. "U-Um...Lucia..." But she would still at least be polite and shake hands.

Zared kept his distance from the townmaster. "Micah Zared. But everyone calls me Zared."
Sasha Vashchenko: "I don't"

Icarus grasps the townmaster's hand with both of his and shakes vigorously Icarus Halkias how ya doing"
Tyler K. (GM): "Very good Very Good! So I hear you're interested in helping out with our Orc problem?"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ye, what's the situation and what's the pay?"
Harbin Wester: "Well, we've got a big group of Orcs roaming around stationed outside of Wyvern Tor, and I need some help trying to get rid of it"
"Greenskinned Bastards have been running roughshot around these parts. I'm offering 100 gold to any group who can take care of em
"
Zared: "That's a lot of gold...They've been that much of a problem for ya?"
Icarus: "I mean I work for peanuts but didn't we just get 50 each for a dozen and some goblins?"
Zared: "Good point."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Not all jobs pay that well... though regardless, can't let orcs roam around and raid the place"
Harbin Wester: "Aye, travellers from the east keep getting sacked by em"
Icarus: "Hey like I said I'd work for a cooked chicken and a mug of ale but I still keep the parties interest in mind"
Sasha Vashchenko: "We can take care of 'em anyway... any idea how big of a group is?"
"Five? A dozen?"
Harbin Wester: "No clue, all we know is they seem to be hiding out at in a cave called Wyvern Tor"
"Several nasty things seem to like taking residence up there"
"Had a Chimera living there for a few years until a group like yourselves came a long
"
Lucia: "So there might be more than orcs..?"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Say, does anyone happen to selling caravans around this place?"
Harbin Wester: ("happen to selling caravans"?)
Sasha Vashchenko: (To be selling)
Harbin Wester: (as in like wagons?)
Sasha Vashchenko: (Yeah)
Harbin Wester: "Strange Way of phrasing it, but your best bet would be checking either at the Lionshield's place or the Mining Exchange. Can't gurantee anything though"
Sasha Vashchenko: "We'll check it out another time then, how far is that cave from here?"
Harbin Wester: "Probably about a half days travel from here"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Well, I think meself ready for the deed, how 'bout you guys?"
Icarus: "Hell yeah, if that's all the urgent business we had here"
Lucia: "I wanted to check something in town first though.."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Oh? A'ight then, we can spare a few"
"Lead the way, Horny!"
Harbin Wester: "God Speed you Adventurers!"
the door closes and you can start to hear heavy snoring coming from the room

Lucia then, assuming business there was done, she would lead the way to the shrine of luck.
Tyler K. (GM): Is anyone accompanying her, or are you preparing to set out?
Sasha Vashchenko: Following
Icarus: (follow)
Tyler K. (GM): Alright
Zared: (following)
Heading shortly north you manage to find the Shrine of Luck. The Shrine appears to be tended to by a young elven woman who sits in meditation praying at the altar. As you approach, she stands up and turns around to greet you.
She appears to be nursing a few minor injuries
Sasha Vashchenko: (What type of injuries?)
(Like cuts or blunt?)

Lucia would approach the woman, looking a bit worried at the injuries. "Excuse me, a-are you Sister Garaele?"
Sister Garaele: Some cuts, scrapes, and stuff, nothing combat related
Fuck my life
Tyler K. (GM): ^
Sasha Vashchenko: She just let Lucia do the talking for now
Sister Garaele: "Yes, I am her," She says, softly "Peace be with you young one"
She looks to every one of you
Sister Garaele: "Say, would you be the group of adventurer's that cleared out the Cragmaws?"
Sasha Vashchenko: "That's us"

Lucia smiles a bit, still seeming worried, but tries to relax some. "I just heard that you came back injured the other day...I wanted to make sure you were alright...A-And what happened?"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Sasha's the name, sister"
Icarus: "Bunch a goblins, a couple of wolves and a bugbear? yeah that's us"
Zared: "Zared and yep. Klarg and his buddies won't be a bother anymore."
Sister Garaele: "Maybe... I can't offer much, but I seek help"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Lay it on us, we could help"
"Especially if the problem can be solved with violence"
Icarus: "Sounds like my kinda job"
Sasha Vashchenko: "We got a never ending supply of violence"

Lucia nods a bit. "We would be happy to help."
Sister Garaele: "You see, I was given a task by my superiors to try and communicate with a Banshee laired around here who takes the name Agatha"
"She apparently knows information about a spellbook belonging to a great mage named Bowgentle"
Sasha Vashchenko: She almost chokes "B-banshee..."
Sister Garaele: "Only one B, but yes" she says earnestly
"The Banshee would not appear to me when I called out for her, and I lost my way out in the woods and took a fairly nasty fall"
she rolls up her sleeves to show some cuts and scrapes as well as a big bruiise on her shoulder
Sister Garaele: "I'm seeking the aid of someone who can help me with this ghost. I think I've figured out a way to get her to show"
She digs through her bags laid next to the altar
Sasha Vashchenko: She clears her throat "Well... a banshee... is kind of a big deal... right now I'm unsure we're properly prepared for this task..."
She -pulls out a jeweled comb
Sister Garaele: "I believe that appealing to the Banshee's vanity might be able to get her to come out. If you present this to her, she may be willing to parlay with you"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ye but... now it might be because me and me father got troubles with sirens... but I reckon a banshee also got the kind of voice that leaves a sting, innit?"
"I mean... we can deal with it later on... maybe... right now I don't feel all that confident 'bout this... how about you guys?"

Lucia turns back to Sasha. "It sounds like we shouldn't have to fight it anyways..?" She turns back to the sister then. "But you want us to go in your stead..?"
Sister Garaele: "O
fuck
"I'm not fit to go out right now, unfortunately"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ye but... it is a spirit... an undead... a pissy, arrogant undead that can get angry at the drop of a hat..."
Icarus: "Persuasion is an often wasted talent of mine, I think we'd be capable of reaching a parlay with it"
Zared: "I'll leave this with the experts. I don't deal or want any dealings with ghosts and phantoms."
Lucia: "W-Well, I could make some medicine to help you if we were staying in town longer, but we already agreed to help with an orc problem...W-Where would we be able to find this banshee though?"
Sasha Vashchenko: She sighs "First, I'd rather take the orcs... at least we can solve a problem for this town before risking our lives on a wailing spirit..."
"After that if Horny and mage boy here are confident enough then I guess we can look after this banshee"
Sister Garaele: "The banshee is laired in the ruins of Conyberry about 3/4 days travel east"
"I understand. I can't offer much in the way of payment but..."
she rummages through her bags
Sister Garaele: "I can only offer these three Healing Potions"
Sasha Vashchenko: "No potion would help us against her wail but a'ight"
Sister Garaele: "I thank you for your consideration"
"May fortune light your path" She says bowing slightly
she turns around and resumes meditation at her shrine
Sister Garaele: Alright
FUCK DAMNIT COCK SUCKING WHORE
Tyler K. (GM): ^
Lucia: (Kek)
Tyler K. (GM): Lets end it here
Sasha Vashchenko: (Aight)
Icarus: (If we must :^) )
Lyei H.: Alrighty
Barthen: Look at me I'm Barthen and I'm a dumb butt lololol
Why am I in control of this
Why didn't we start yet
Why do you torment me so
Tyler K. (GM): because god hates it when you touch yourself at night
Shoulder Devil: I don't though
You filthy degenerate
Lyei H.: Yes you do
Shoulder Devil: Don't project your sins onto me
My heart is as pure as a maiden
SO EHY WE STARTING OR WILL YOU KEEP BEING DEGENERATES FOR A LITTLE MORE
Tyler K. (GM): Alright
so
After some brief delays
We return to the adventures of F.U.C.K
Last time we encountered our heroes
They did a thing
Tyler K. (GM): Orcs are in a place
Sasha Vashchenko: "A'ight so here is the battleplan... we wreck orcs and then MAYBE we deal with the banshee"
Tyler K. (GM): time to kill some greenskins
Also ghosts
Ruh'Ro Gang
How are they gonna solve this one
Find out, now
Icarus: "Alright let's get this party on the road!"
Sasha Vashchenko: "You... you're just awful..."
Tyler K. (GM): First off, roll call, everyone here?
Lyei H.: I think I'm here
Tyler K. (GM): Good because I'm not
William D.: I am in the process of ascending (getting turnt)
Shoulder Devil: YOU'RE NOT BEING CLEVER OR WITTY I HATE YOU START ALREADY AAAAAAUGH
Tyler K. (GM): Dev is here
Thats good
Lucia: "W-We should at least try to help with the banshee t-too..."
Tyler K. (GM): Oy, Rex
Sasha Vashchenko: "That comes later... if we feel like it..."
"Really, a banshee horny, it ain't the goblin from the caves"
Lyei H.: I'm sending him caps lock messages on skype, I'm sure he'll show up
Icarus: "I feel like I had a plan for her"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Banshee can kill all of us with a word... hell, with a letter, depending how she scream!"
Rex S.: (I've been here)
Tyler K. (GM): Ok
Icarus: "Wish I could remember what it was hehe"
Tyler K. (GM): So, are we ready for SOME GOOD WHOLESOME FUN
Sasha Vashchenko: "Anyway, let's hit the road, I'm growing mushrooms here, need to get a move"
Tyler K. (GM): Alright, so are you just heading down the road with your packs and nothing else?
You could probably procure a cart in town with some coin if you desire
Sasha Vashchenko: (How much coin?)
Icarus: (didn't someone do that last time?)
Tyler K. (GM): 15 gp
Cart is 15gp
Sasha Vashchenko: (Let me check logs for carts being bought)
(Also I assume we need something to drag the cart around)
Tyler K. (GM): You could hook it up to the orc
Icarus: (maybe I'm imagining it idfk)
Tyler K. (GM): half-orc*\
Icarus: (lol)
Sasha Vashchenko: (Nobody bought it)
Tyler K. (GM): You guys came in on a covered wagon, but that was property of Barthen
Sasha Vashchenko: (How much for a bull or whatever to drag the cart about?)
Icarus: (how far are we travelling, do we really need one?)
Sasha Vashchenko: (Always convenient to have a cart)
Tyler K. (GM): I'll say another 15 GP for a sturdy ox
I mean, its an investment
Rex S.: (So am i paying for the cart or?)
Sasha Vashchenko: Buys the ox and a cart, the cart shall be named Land Shark
Zared: "Land shark? Really?"
Icarus: "All aboard the Land Shark!"
Sasha Vashchenko: "My thirty shinies, my name"
Tyler K. (GM): You stop by the woodshop and pick up a fine cart. You talk to Barthen, and he trades you one of his Oxen
Sasha Vashchenko: "By the way, one of ye is going to drive" She puts a nice spot for herself to rest and meditate, with the pillows that obviously were included in this expensive wooden thing
Tyler K. (GM): I would have also accepted "Pussy Wagon", "Sex Machine", or "Shag-mobile"
Sasha Vashchenko: Sasha does her own memes
Lucia: "D-Do any of us know how to?"
Tyler K. (GM): You hold the reigns
And make it go straight
Its not a racing horse
Icarus: "We got here didn't we of course we do"
Zared: "......None of you are naming my ship once I buy it."
Sasha Vashchenko: "It's a ox Horny, 'sides greenie was driving the cart before we came here, remember?" She cackles "That would imply YOU will buy one"
Lucia: "I think by her rules say y-you would name it if you buy it anyways..."
Sasha Vashchenko: "If we're getting a ship 'tis going to be mine"
"Anyway, chop chop, let's get going"
Tyler K. (GM): Alright, so after a few hours, various signs and twists in the road lead you to where you were told was called Wyvern's Tor

Icarus sings an old folk tune about being on the road again
Tyler K. (GM): The forest is thick, and you can't see the orc encampment from the road
Sasha Vashchenko: She just enjoys the ride, only occasionally giving a look about "Don't be too loud bud... whistle it instead..."
Zared: "Any green skin besides me...Would take that as invitation right now."
Tyler K. (GM): A great hill rises from the forest, covered in crooked rocks and terrain
Sasha Vashchenko: "Avast, that be a mighty wave!"
Tyler K. (GM): Not like, at once
It was there
Rising, metaphorically
Sasha Vashchenko: "I must say, land sailings are much less eventful"

Zared sighs as he looks around the area for the chance of a unwelcomed surprise "Still on with the jokes I see."
Lucia: "I like less eventful though..."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Did I ever stop?" She says, acting a bit like a brat
Tyler K. (GM): so do you guys look for the camp?
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ehy keep an eye on the sky for smoke, they might have started a fire"
Tyler K. (GM): If so, make perception or survival checks
Sasha Vashchenko:

Zared simply grumbled under his breath and looked around any signs of orc activity
Zared:
Sasha Vashchenko: She is clueless to anything
Icarus:
Tyler K. (GM): Icarus manages to find some tracks
Icarus: "Ah behold footprints"
Tyler K. (GM): There seems to be multiple orcs, and he can very faintly make out what look to be much larger footprints.
Icarus: "They have something big with them"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ten coppery 'tis that big oaf that ran away last time"
"Ten more he was probably captured instead of being part of their group"

Zared remains quiet and walks over to Icarus "You think our old friend could make tracks this big?"
Icarus: "Iunno maybe"
"We'll soon find out"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Anyway..." She hops off the cart "Let's tie the ox somewhere safe and follow, aye?"
Zared: "Aye. Let's get this over with."
Tyler K. (GM): The tracks lead you to a rocky recess in the hill
You can make out a single lone guard at the front of the camp, a dumb and brutal expression on his face as he picks his teeth
Sasha Vashchenko: "Shock and awe?"
Icarus: (are we ever getting a map?)
Sasha Vashchenko: (Also going to assume we won't have visual aid uhn?)
Tyler K. (GM): yes, gibbe a sec
Sasha Vashchenko: (TWO WEEKS AND YOU DIDN'T PREPARE SOMETHING AHEAD OF TIME?)
(YOU CLOD)
Lucia: (Shush your sperging)
Tyler K. (GM): (Do you want to my calculus for me?)
Icarus: (sperg is his default setting)
Sasha Vashchenko: (I BET YOU EVEN HAVE A SOCIAL LIFE AND WHATNOT)
Zared: (Damn normies. They ruin everything.)
Tyler K. (GM): >STEM Major
>Social Life
Lucia: "U-Um...Do you think that's most appropriate?"
Tyler K. (GM): Haha
Good one
Anyway
Guard
What do
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ye want to talk to it?"
Tyler K. (GM): You're currently hidden in the brush
Sasha Vashchenko: "It will raise an alarm and attack us"
Lucia: "I-It doesn't look the brightest...M-Maybe it'd think Zared is one of them..?"
Tyler K. (GM): (uh oh)
Zared: "......That wouldn't work...."
Sasha Vashchenko: "So we settled on killin' it?"
"Aight, after me then!" She just jumps out and charges the fucker, hoping in a surprise round
Tyler K. (GM): Alrighty then
Icarus: "Come on my fingers are twitching for action"
Tyler K. (GM): initiatives then
Icarus:
Sasha Vashchenko:
Lucia:
Zared:
Sasha Vashchenko: (No surprise round I assume?)
Tyler K. (GM): No, you get a suprise round, they roll initiative after suprise, no?
Sasha Vashchenko: (Oh gotcha)
Tyler K. (GM): Anyway, for some reason, the cleric is the one who's going first
You guys better take him down quickly too, or he's likely to raise the alarm

Icarus is too impatient to focus properly

Lucia doesn't have any charging to do, and gets to sling a spell out right away. Yay no charging!
Lucia:
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+1
(
17
)+1
= 18
Tyler K. (GM): The orc is suprised by the sudden burst of heat and the searing pain, but manages to mostly shake it off, save for some singed ears
Z
Icarus: (I can't see anyone's turn order btw, black other than Sasha)
Sasha Vashchenko: (Because sasha did her homework and clicked on the token before rolling for initiative)
Tyler K. (GM): Can you see it now?
Try dragging it

Zared would charge at the orc with both of his weapons ready he went to swing at the orc's stomach with his hook first. Hoping it wouldn't miss.
Zared:
Tyler K. (GM): Distance doesn't really matter right now, you're all pretty much at the edge of the forest, I just kind of put you down on the map
Icarus: (We didn't have tokens at the time, also still no, I'm not too fussed)
Tyler K. (GM): You slam the orc to the ground and pierce through his chainmail with your warpick, he goes down clutching his chest trying to stumble to his feet
Ic
Icarus: With a flare of the hands and a short chart Icarus casts Firebolt
Tyler K. (GM): Do you roll d20 on that?
It hit, btw
Icarus: (no it's a cantrip)
(After he goes down I'll cast Armor and I'll have to roll on the table after that lol)
Tyler K. (GM): Aight, you hit the orc straigh in the chest, but the sudden flare of the moment caused by the monk has got you all flustered, the spell damaging, but not being too powerfull
Sasha Vashchenko: (How wounded does the orc look?)
(Bleeding heavily, looking fine?)
Tyler K. (GM): He's got maybe a few punches before he's out
Sasha Vashchenko: Will be happy to supply those punches, with an extra of wooden staff
Tyler K. (GM): You Sweep him off his feet and Ground and Pound him.
Do you intend to kill?
Sasha Vashchenko: (Yeah, death to the greenskin)
Zared: (HEY)
Lucia: (Nah, the half greenskin is fine)
Tyler K. (GM): (purging intensifies)
Zared: (Ah alright then)
Tyler K. (GM): A shot to the throat and he's gone
Sasha Vashchenko: She chuckles to herself and stand up "That's how we do it! No alarm, no guard, no fuss!"
"Aight, let's head inside now, got more of these to kill... you think we should collect the ears for a reward?"

Zared stares at the door and glares at it "You can do that if you want."
Tyler K. (GM): The sudden flurry took him down in about five-ten seconds, and it doesn't sound like anyone heard
Icarus: "Alrighty then, before we head further in I should cast some protection, but err you might want to stand back folks"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Mhn... nah... too dirty..." She then looks at Icarus, curious "Oh? Aight, whatcha got then?"
Icarus: "I fucked with luck a bit last time we ventured out and I'm gonna pay for it, so you two go ahead of me, please"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Don't be a wuss, just do it already!"
Zared: "....Alright....Stand behind Lucy if you need to."
Sasha Vashchenko: "We're wasting time here"
Zared: would then slowly stand away from the door. Waiting patiently for whatever was going to happen to happen.
Icarus: (seriously are you two not gonna move?)
Sasha Vashchenko: Moves slightly backwards after rolling her eyes
Icarus: (You're fine I'm more concerned for the two behind me)
Lucia: (Is that even really where we are)
Icarus: (fuckit your funeral)

Lucia either way isn't going to argue if the caster wants space
Icarus: (just go stand by sasha)
74
(A random creature within 60 feet of you becomes poisoned for 1d4 hours.)
(lol)
Lucia: (Oh boy)
Tyler K. (GM): alright
(To GM) rolling d9
(
5
)
= 5
Zared: (Who's the lucky person?)
Tyler K. (GM): Somewhere in the encampment, you hear a groaning
Violent retching is clearly audible
Icarus: (maybe the corpse? a random squirrel?)
Lucia: (So how blown is our cover)
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ehy, watcha done? Do it some more!"
Icarus: "Oh sound like that went better than expected"
Tyler K. (GM): A scream from within the camp
"OI"
Sasha Vashchenko: (I mean, they don't know he did it)
Tyler K. (GM): "DID ONE OF YOUS PISS IN THE SOUP AGAIN"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ugh... again... disgusting..."

Lucia looks at the camp
Sasha Vashchenko: "Let's go kill them before I puke..." She heads inside

Lucia then looks at Icarus
Tyler K. (GM): Stealth Checks everyone
Sasha Vashchenko:
Icarus:
Zared:
Lucia:
(Well)
Zared: (It would be you)
Lucia: (I blame the nat 1)
Tyler K. (GM): Sasha, manages to sneak in effortlessly darting between cover
Zared manages to maneuver his hulking mass, using the shadow as cover
Icarus quietly maneuvers himself behind a rocky outcropping
Lucia
You enter the camp, and trip on a loose rock in the ground
The orcs look at you, out in the open
Tyler K. (GM): "A DEMON"
"SHE MUSTA BIN DA ONE TO POISON WHO POISONED THE GROG"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Pssst... Horny... make them hail you as their new God!"
She whispers quietly
"Like... Oh oh oh, I can poison you with jus ta snap of my finger or some crap!"
Tyler K. (GM): You see a chained up ogre get mad
and start huffing

Lucia is very flustered at all this, and can't manage to talk, let alone convince them she's some kind of god.
Zared: "They aren't that dumb....Right..."
Tyler K. (GM): and puffing
"GOD MAKE GRUNK SICK
"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ahahah..."
"A-ehm..."
Tyler K. (GM): "GRUNK MAKE GOD PAY"
"GRUNK PUNCH GOD"
Sasha Vashchenko: She suddently jumps from the shadow, with a backflip
Tyler K. (GM): "GRUNK PUNCH GOD TO MOON"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Have I been called my liege?"
Tyler K. (GM): The ogre, apparently named Grunk, rips out the post he was chained to and begins wielding it as a giant club
Icarus: "Woah boy"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Oh? What is that? These orcs are speaking in too much high of a tone? I understand you clearly, for you hold the power to kill everything with a single word, thus mind speaking is required!"
"Indeed, only by turning your head you, godess of poison, could kill them all in a second!"

Lucia still can't seem to talk, but is probably able to come to her feet at the threat of giant clubbing.
Sasha Vashchenko: "Indeed, you created me from mere shadows... you could create a thousands more... RIGHT BEHIND THEM!" She points behind the orcs
Tyler K. (GM): It looks like they're beyond reasoning with now
Roll initiatives again
Sasha Vashchenko: "Oh well, it usually works... butchering time!"
Icarus:
Zared:
Sasha Vashchenko: (Again? Come on!)
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling 6d20
(
15
+
20
+
8
+
3
+
14
+
17
)
= 77
Lucia:
(Thanks initiative, a good roll after I could have used it)
Icarus: "Hmm that Thunderwave trick ain't gonna work this time"
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20
(
16
)
= 16
Sasha Vashchenko: "Don't worry, I got a new trick, self taught... I call it..." She strikes an heroic albeit somewhat ridicolous pose "The Minor Ursa!"
Cue to "Yooooooooooo" japanese yell
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20
(
10
)
= 10
Icarus: "Well it's not as if I don't have something new up my sleave either"
Tyler K. (GM): Alright
So
The first orc comes up and rushes you Icarus
He takes a swing with his cleaver and crude leather apron on, probably the butcher of this camp
Icarus: "Well aren't you a feisty one"
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+5
(
4
)+5
= 9
Tyler K. (GM): Your Ethereal Armor briefly becomes tangible to deflect the blow
Sasha Vashchenko: "Greenie, ye cover Horny, I'll go break that one's neck if they don't handle 'im themselves!"
Tyler K. (GM): The most decorated orc, probably the chief of this band, runs forward, and with a load and gutteral yell, chucks a javelin at Lucia
Zared: (Can i run infront of the javelin or is that just impossible right now?)
Icarus: (she's a big girl I'm sure she can handle herself)
Tyler K. (GM): You could, but you'll sacrifice your movement and attack if you do
Lucia: (I have armor at least?)
Tyler K. (GM): She does have armor
Lucia: (So I think I'm fine)
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+3
(
11
)+3
= 14
Tyler K. (GM): Do you do it?
Zared: (Nah)
Tyler K. (GM): Alright
It seems your god is with you, as the javelin misses you and strikes the ground behind you
Another Orc tries charging Sasha Wielding a big fuck off axe
(To GM) rolling d20+5
(
5
)+5
= 10
Tyler K. (GM): You manage to sidestep the attack
Lucia

Lucia finally gets her wits about her enough to get out the components of a spell to cast at the chief.
Lucia:
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+1
(
8
)+1
= 9
Sasha Vashchenko: (I don't see Zared on the turn list and he rolled a 18, is it only me or you have it Tyler?)
Tyler K. (GM): No, he's right behind Lucia
Sasha Vashchenko: (noted, just making sure since I don't see it myself)
Lucia: (I don't see him on the turn list either, but he is after me)
Tyler K. (GM): Anyway, your sacred fire burns Zared
Fuck
Chieften
Sasha Vashchenko: (Kek)
Tyler K. (GM): All orcs looks the same to me
Lucia: (Whoops, wrong greenie)
Tyler K. (GM): finna dindu nuffin]
Icarus: (racist)
Tyler K. (GM): Anyway, fire, chief, burn
There is a circle in the grass where the heat of the divine seems to sear the very earth
Z

Zared would then run infront of the horny one and pull out a hand axe. He chuck it at the one who threw the javelin at the poor girl
Zared:
Tyler K. (GM): huh
Let me see
Sasha Vashchenko: (Zared completely disappeared for me, kek)
Zared: (Yea I'm gone >.>)
Tyler K. (GM): The axe manages to find its target, and gets the chief in the arm
Icarus: (get out from under lucy lol)
Zared: (I thought I missed that)
Tyler K. (GM): Another orc comes running from its tent to throw another javelin at you Luci
(To GM) rolling d20+5
(
8
)+5
= 13
Icarus: (the turn order completely disappeared for me lol)
(Oh there it is)
Tyler K. (GM): It also misses
The other one seems to also be focusing his efforts on you, trying to smite the demon
(To GM) rolling d20+5
(
15
)+5
= 20
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling 1d6+3
(
3
)+3
= 6
Lucia: (The demon carrying the symbol of a good goddess and calling down divine fire)
Tyler K. (GM): The orc's javelin hits, doing 6 damage
"OI, SHE'S USING FIRE"
"DEMONS USE FIRE"
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH"
etc
>finnadindunuffin orcs
Lucia: (Yep, they're stupid xD)
Tyler K. (GM): >knowing a holy symbol
Lucia: (I know, I'm just being funny)
Tyler K. (GM): Anyway

Zared lets out a low orky growl "....I might be related to these bastards."
Zared: whispered that under his breath
Tyler K. (GM): An orc comes running from the very back of the camp, going full sprint
The orc, in his rage, throws one of his companions at Lucy
Ogre
Not orc
Throws orc
Ogre Throws Orc
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+2
(
17
)+2
= 19
Tyler K. (GM): The orc finds its mark, crashing into the both of you, sending you both tumbling to the ground
You'll have to spend your move action next turn getting up
Sasha
Sasha Vashchenko: She release her Ultimate Just Made Up Jutzu
"ORAORAORAORAORAORA!!"
Sasha Vashchenko: (Does Jab hits?))
Tyler K. (GM): Everything hits
Sasha Vashchenko:
Tyler K. (GM): its fucking dead
Sasha Vashchenko: Cue to "Perfect!" voice
Tyler K. (GM): Litterally any two of those would have killed it
Jesus
Alright
Icarus
Sasha Vashchenko: "Sorry buddy, I got problems here as well, I'll come soon 'nuff for you too!"
Zared: "...It's like she's a mini ogre..."
Sasha Vashchenko: (Oh wait, can I still move?)
Tyler K. (GM): If you want

Icarus casts shocking grasp then bitch slaps his adversary across his face
Sasha Vashchenko: After the vicious beatdown, she reaches the sorcerer "And by soon enough I mean NOW"
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d4
(
3
)
= 3
Icarus:
Tyler K. (GM): The orc shudders with the sudden jolt
Thats a cantrip, right?
Icarus: (yep)
Sasha Vashchenko: (Actually, since it can't take reaction after it)
(Couldn't you retreat?)
Tyler K. (GM): it is stunned
Sasha Vashchenko: (As in, if you're shocked you lose the reaction, which I assume is the attack of opportunity to leave)
(Aka, you can waltz around freely)
Icarus: (I suppose I could go help protect Luci)
Sasha Vashchenko: (Or avoid melee, ya clod)
Icarus: (couldn't it chase me on it's next turn anyway?)
Sasha Vashchenko: (No because I would get an attack of opportunity then)
Icarus: (good point)
Sasha Vashchenko: (So basically, he gets stuck with me)
Icarus: "I've softened him up for you, he's all yours"

Icarus is limbering up for something bigger
Sasha Vashchenko: She looks at the orc and says "Omae wa mou shindeiru"
Tyler K. (GM): The orc recovers briefly and tries to slash at Sasha, taking a long wild swing
(To GM) rolling d20+1
(
1
)+1
= 2
Tyler K. (GM): Still dazed from the shock, the Orc Swings his Cleaver, but loses its grip
The Flying Cleaver turns over in the air, finally landing in the ogre's arm
The ogre cries out in pain
Sasha Vashchenko: Snort
"Eheh... come on now... get it together man..."
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d12+3
(
8
)+3
= 11
Sasha Vashchenko: "Okay look, just get on your belly and surrender and I won't give you a vicious beating"
Tyler K. (GM): "MUST BE GOD WHO MAKE MEAT CHOP CHOP GRUNK. GRUNK NO MEAT. GRUNK EAT GOD"
Sasha Vashchenko: She is talking to the now most likely disarmed orc
Tyler K. (GM): The orc is too stupid to understand you, and also still kind of out of his mind
form the whole arcane tazer thing
Sasha Vashchenko: "I guess there is no peaceful way to settle this!"

Lucia is probably never going to live this down if she survives this.
Zared: "They are orcs and the dumbest of orcs. You either get rid of them or they take everything from you."
Tyler K. (GM): The Chieften Runs full sprint towards Zared, but misses
Sasha Vashchenko: "Word!"
Tyler K. (GM): Luci
Sasha Vashchenko: "Not like it's personal... it's just natural selection... if yer a mouse ye don't go raiding the lion's den, aye?"
"So orcs, goblins and the other savages can't go expecting to raid human settlements!"

Lucia gets up, and gets up casting, since that's most of what she's good at.
Lucia:
(On self)
Tyler K. (GM): Alright
Zared
Lucia: (Don't I still have a normal action since that just takes a bonus action?)
(Or did getting up take that)
Icarus: (casting says bonus, don't know what else you'd do)
Lucia: (Heal?)

Zared glares at sasha for a moment before turning back to the orc. He'd let out a howling orc growl and swing at the closest orc's neck with his war hook
Tyler K. (GM): I didn't know it was bonus action
Zared:
Tyler K. (GM): Go ahead and do what you like
Lucia: (Is anyone else injured?)
Tyler K. (GM): Your attack hits Zared, square in the jaw
No
Sasha Vashchenko: (Zared hit himself)
Lucia:
rolling 1d8
(
7
)
= 7
Sasha Vashchenko: (Even he can't tell himself apart from other orcs)
Lucia: (On self again, so I'm back to full)
Tyler K. (GM): Alrighty
Zared: (Zared's the half-orc)
Tyler K. (GM): Another orc runs in to the fray
Attacking Zared
(To GM) rolling d20+7
(
7
)+7
= 14
Tyler K. (GM): You manage to parry the attack however, before it can land
Another orc rushes Sasha
(To GM) rolling d20+7
(
17
)+7
= 24
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d8+3
(
8
)+3
= 11
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d8+3
(
7
)+3
= 10

Zared stared down at the orc that tried and simply sighed. He was clearly unimpressed
Tyler K. (GM): The orc slashes at Sasha, and with two opponents, she gets caught with the attack, taking five damage in the process
Sasha Vashchenko: "Вы сука!"
Icarus: "You sure know a lot of strange dialects Sasha"
Tyler K. (GM): Zared, make a Dexterity check
Zared:
Tyler K. (GM): You manage to dodge out of the way, as the ogre in his rage comes barreling through, bringing his makeshift club down on Luci
Lucia: (Will save!)
Tyler K. (GM): (right right)
William D.: (I'll think about it)
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20-2
(
12
)-2
= 10
Sasha Vashchenko: (I think the ogre, since poison gains disadvantage to both ability checks and attacks, which means it ain't as fearsome as it looks)
(And that was a grammatic disaster)
Tyler K. (GM): What's the DC for the saving throw
Lucia: (11)
Tyler K. (GM): He fails and unconsciously swings at Icarus instead
(To GM) rolling d20+6
(
9
)+6
= 15
Tyler K. (GM): What's your effective armor class Icarus?
As in with the bonus?
Icarus: (Well I'm not gonna be tryin ta save Luci again any time soon)
(14)
(with mage armor? yeah)
Tyler K. (GM): Your mage armor barely manages to hold against the attack
It sparkles with ethereal energy
Icarus: (I was dc'd for a sec there, woot)
Tyler K. (GM): Woops
Sasha
Your turn
Sasha Vashchenko: She unleash another volley of blows
(UGH)
Sasha Vashchenko: (SERIOUSLY)
Guess she lost her stance after snickering behind the other's orc failure
Tyler K. (GM): Having to split your attention between two opponents causes you to miss your attack
Icarus
Icarus: (since I'm not it's target I can back away from this fucker a little right?)
Tyler K. (GM): Hmmm
If you disengage
As your action
Icarus: (eh I'll just stay put then)

Icarus casts Witch Bolt at the huge ugly ogre
Icarus:
(fuck that I tides of chaos for the afdvantage)
(can I do that?)
Tyler K. (GM): The attack hits as you warp reality to your whim
What does it do?
Sasha Vashchenko: (Pretty lights)
Icarus: (I get advantage on the roll, so the higher roll)
Sasha Vashchenko: (The Witch Bolt basically strikes and then keep a current between target and caster and caster can deal damage automatically each turn)
Tyler K. (GM): All right, yeah
Icarus: (Oh you meant what the spell does?)
Tyler K. (GM): The Ogre convulses a bit in shock
"TWO GOD? GRONK EAT BOTH"
The orc takes a swing at Sasha
(To GM) rolling d20+5
(
9
)+5
= 14
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+5
(
6
)+5
= 11
Tyler K. (GM): He misses as you weave inbetween the two orcs
The chieften charges at Zared letting out a warhowl
(To GM) rolling d20+5
(
19
)+5
= 24
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d12+3
(
6
)+3
= 9
Tyler K. (GM): He lands a solid hit with his axe, doing 9 damage to your arm
Lucia
Your turn

Zared would wince at the blow "G-Gah...." he'd snicker afterwards "Heh. Good job. This is the first time I've felt any pain since I've gotten here. Thanks for making this interesting again."
Lucia: (Is Zared below half HP?)
Tyler K. (GM): Is he?
Zared: (Yep why?)
Lucia: (If I should dish out healing right away or not)
Zared: (Nah)
Lucia: (If you're sure)

Lucia just spends her turn trying to defend herself, since she doesn't want to lose her sanctuary
Icarus: (wait until after Grunk smashes my skull in)
Tyler K. (GM): alright
Z

Zared would then go to thrust his warhook into the orge that managed to hurt him.
Zared:
Tyler K. (GM): The blow left you reeling and unfortunately off your mark
The other orc takes a swing at Sasha
(To GM) rolling 2d20+5
(
16
+
13
)+5
= 34
Tyler K. (GM): He manages to miss as you dodge around the two of them

Zared would begin to let out a few labored breaths "D-Damn...It was just a scratch..."
Tyler K. (GM): Grunk tries to swing at Luci again
(To GM) rolling 2d20
(
16
+
4
)
= 20
Tyler K. (GM): He again is unable to on a subconscious level, and tries to hit Icarus instead
(To GM) rolling 2d20+6
(
20
+
5
)+6
= 31
Tyler K. (GM): He Swings Wildly and doesn't hit
Sasha
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ugh... gotta go back to the fundamentals..."
She focuses on the armed orc
(Bo strike, I assume)
Tyler K. (GM): Both hit
Sasha Vashchenko:
Tyler K. (GM): Wait
Just the bo, you're right
Sasha Vashchenko: (Then just 8)
Tyler K. (GM): At which one?
The damaged one I assume?
The bo staff cracks his skull and he thuds to the ground
Icarus

Icarus continues to concentrate as he fires an arc of lightning up the ogres ass 1
Icarus: also wild magic check since I didn't last turn 13
(wow a mighty1 damage)
Sasha Vashchenko: (Pardon froze)
(I wanted to harm the armed one but I'll settle with the other one)
Tyler K. (GM): Alright
Does the wild magic do anything?
Icarus: (nah only if I roll a one on the check)
Tyler K. (GM): alright
The chief swings again
(To GM) rolling d20+5
(
14
)+5
= 19
Tyler K. (GM): The blow glances off the armor on your right shoulder
Lucia
Icarus: (tho if I cast a new spell I guess I have to roll on the table to as part of the Tides of Chaos recovery, the wording for it's a bit iffy)

Lucia likes the sanctuary, the sanctuary is her friend. She keeps defending.
Tyler K. (GM): Alright
Zared
Icarus: (how many turns is a minute btw?)
Tyler K. (GM): I think six
Icarus: (k that's how long I can sustain witch's bolt)
Lucia: (I'm more familiar with 3.5/PF where it was 10, but I don't know)
Sasha Vashchenko: (Depends, some people say ten)
(A round being six seconds)
(Also I believe that everytime you use Tide of Chaos and then cast a spell you both regain the ability and cause a surge)
Tyler K. (GM): is it ten? alright
Ten it is
Zared?

Zared would then go try to attack the closest orc again "Go down. You stupid orc!" he said with labored frustration in his shout
Zared:
Icarus: (I cause a surge, but I have to rest to regain the ability, so it's not like I can spam it)
Zared:
(that's a crit right?)
Sasha Vashchenko: (But it says you regain the ability after, I'll look it up in depth for you)
Tyler K. (GM): Yeah, it was a crit
Either way he's Dead
Icarus: (I have it on my sheet fam)
Zared: (Time to get savage and now I can switch to something else!)
Icarus: (>Once you do so, you must finish a long rest before you can use this feature again.
>Any time before you regain the use of this feature, the DM can have you roll on the Wild Magic Surge table immediately after you cast a sorcerer spell)
Sasha Vashchenko: (Alright basically the DM decide when to make you roll for Wild Surge and if he choose to make you do a Surge you regain Tide back)
(So technically you can use it again as long as the DM decide to make you roll a surge)
(So basically, once per day unless the DM decides to fuck with you)
Tyler K. (GM): cool
Zared: (It's not wild surge it's the half orc ability)
Icarus: (that's not how I read it but whatevs)
Tyler K. (GM): Its basically, this
He uses The Tides or whatever
And I can fuck with him whenever he casts a spell if I choose
Until he rests
Sasha Vashchenko: (Yeah, if he rests and regain the ability you can't fuck with him)
Icarus: (actually I get what you mean Dev, this is what it meant by the wording being iffy)
Sasha Vashchenko: (I looked it up, it appears that is how it is supposed to be interpreted)
(Anyway, continue)
(I want the delicious XP)
Tyler K. (GM): Alright

Zared would pull out the warhook from the and let out a animalistic growl as he charged right at the orge. His teeth would look sharper than usual and he'd come at the giant with both of his weapons swinging wildly
Tyler K. (GM): Ork make swing at funny accent lady
(To GM) rolling d20+5
(
7
)+5
= 12
Tyler K. (GM): Ork miss
Ork sad
Zared: (>.>)
Tyler K. (GM): Grunk Tries to slam dunk god once more
(To GM) rolling 2d20-1
(
7
+
13
)-1
= 19
Tyler K. (GM): And unfortunately can't
(To GM) rolling 2d20+6
(
1
+
10
)+6
= 17
Lucia: (I'm both surprised and not that this thing can't make a DC 11 will save)
Tyler K. (GM): He swings at Icarus, but the poison knocks him to the ground and he lands with a hard thunk
He has disadvantage
Sasha Vashchenko: (Poison is a bitch)
Lucia: (Good point)
Tyler K. (GM): Sasha
Sasha Vashchenko: (Man I keep freezing)
Sasha unleash a barrage of blows against the lone orc, hopefully this time she will hit something
Tyler K. (GM): Both hit
Sasha Vashchenko:
Tyler K. (GM): He ded
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ah... now I can focus on the big guy!"
Tyler K. (GM): Ic

Icarus maintains his control of the arcing lightning 1
Icarus: (the fuck are these rolls)
Zared: (With one exception. I've been loving them)
Tyler K. (GM): Lucia

Lucia finally lets go of her protective sanctuary, drawing her mace to attack the ogre now that the rest of their foes were down.
Lucia:
Tyler K. (GM): It hits
Lucia: (Wow)
Tyler K. (GM): Advantage, since its knocked down
Zared

Zared goes to town. Still letting his orc blood run wild he'd continue to swing his blades at the orge.
Zared:
Tyler K. (GM): Both hit
Zared:
Tyler K. (GM): You manage to hit vital spots on the ogre's exposed back
Grunk gets back up, and tries to swipe and pick up god
Zared: "Harrgh! Pathetic!"
Tyler K. (GM): Luci, roll a dex save would ya for me?
Lucia:
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ehy I was thinkin'... what if we hire this idiot for own uses?"
Tyler K. (GM): You manage to step out of the way just in time, and he swipes at thin air
Sasha Vashchenko: "Or better, what if we straight up dominate him and make him our bithc?"
Icarus: "I'm having way too much fun for that"
Tyler K. (GM): (phrasing)
Sasha
Sasha Vashchenko: "Bah! You've never saw an ogre corsair! They are the best!" She rushes over Grunk
(How wounded is it?)
(And do I get bonus from attacking from behind?)
Tyler K. (GM): Its not doing too good
You get an advantage, yeah
Sasha Vashchenko: "Look trust be, try to keep it alive, it's so going to be worth it!" She pummels the ogre with ther fiery fist but aims only to stun
Tyler K. (GM):
wih
wat in tarnation
Sasha Vashchenko: (3 ones)
(Chek'em)
Tyler K. (GM): anyway, you manage to land a few solid blows on the ogre
Zared: "I can't promise that."
Tyler K. (GM): Icarus
Sasha Vashchenko: "Don't worry, just bash him 'till he goes down, after this brusin' he'll pass out before he dies out!)
Icarus: "Me neither"

Icarus continues to concentrate 5
Tyler K. (GM): The Ogre's on Death's door right now
It's stumbling now, a light breeze could knock it over
Lucia
Sasha Vashchenko: "Aight, just try to knock it out!"
Lucia: "A-Are we sure we want to keep it alive?"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Haw come on, you're getting cold feet over pacifism now?"
"Just let me handle 'im then!"
Icarus: "Imma just keep frying it's ass for now"
Lucia: "It obviously doesn't like me!"

Lucia but fine, she'll try to just tip it over with her mace
Lucia:
Tyler K. (GM): It falls hard to the ground
Its breathing, but probably just barely alive
And the poison isn't doing any favors
Sasha Vashchenko: "Aight! Now let me just..." She looks around for anything strong enough to block the ogre, failing that she will just use several layers of cloth from the tents
Tyler K. (GM): So, how exactly do you plan on getting it down to the road
We can leave that question, for next time
Sasha Vashchenko: (Like a complete cocoon, so he simply doesn't have the movement to use its strength)
Tyler K. (GM): Because I kind of want to die right now
Shoulder Devil: I am going to get an ogre hireling
Lucia: (Thanks for having the game though)
Tyler K. (GM): Good session
Shoulder Devil: No matter what
He will throw Sasha around
And fun will be had

Zared would then let out a another growl "This is bullshit!" he would then start smashing whatever inanimate object he could with his weapons.
Tyler K. (GM): Give me a few minutes, I'll tally up your total XP gained
I'll post it in discord
Sasha Vashchenko: "Oh Zared, don't get too pissed off! We're going to get an ogre!"
"Trust me, they are great at workin', ye just need to honey them up with ale and whatnot!"
351
1501
Zared: "I don't care about that right now! I wanted to beat the crap out of all of them!"
Sasha Vashchenko: "And ye did!"
Zared: "Not enough!"
Sasha Vashchenko: "We can find more on the road, I'm sure!"
Zared: would continue his rampage as he bludgeoned all of the items in the kitchen area
Tyler K. (GM): Five Minutes, checking up on everything

Icarus has a vision of the near future and the power achieved therein
Tyler K. (GM): Roll Call
Icarus: (call roll)
Sasha Vashchenko: HUZAAA
Lyei H.: (Hi)
Sasha Vashchenko: Get on discord honry
*horny
Lyei H.: But discord hates me
Sasha Vashchenko: Did you read the thing about XP?
Lyei H.: I think someone changed it for me anyways
Tyler K. (GM): Long Short of it is I fucked up
Lyei H.: But yes I did read that last week
Tyler K. (GM): Its 288 XP, not 1000+
Sasha Vashchenko: So we didn't get to level 3
Tyler K. (GM): Alright, so last time on F.U.C.K
FILTHY FUCKING GREENSKINS
KICK THEIR SHIT IN
OGRE POISONED
GREENSKIN'S SHIT = KICKED
PASSED OUT OGRE, WAT DO?
Tyler K. (GM): FIND OUT TONIGHT
Sasha Vashchenko: Checks if the ogre is tied up enough
Tyler K. (GM): ON F U C K
So do you guys try and get him down to the cart?
Sasha Vashchenko: Is the fucker tied up enough

Rex S. still looks a bit miffed about getting blue balled in a sense
Zared: me/ still looks a bit miffed about getting blue balled in a sense
Tyler K. (GM): Did you tie up the fucker?
Sasha Vashchenko: I tied up the fucker
In several layers
Tyler K. (GM): Do a survival check, as this is quite the heavy load to have to tie up
Them Boyscout knots
Sasha Vashchenko: Don't I get it naturally since I am a sailor and I make knots for a living?
Tyler K. (GM): True
I'll give you advantage on it
Sasha Vashchenko: Zared helping as well
UGH
Tyler K. (GM): You can reroll it
Sasha Vashchenko:
Tyler K. (GM): Since Zared was helping
Sasha Vashchenko: OKAY WHAT THE FUCK
Tyler K. (GM): I'm gonna say it took a while, but it worked
Lucia: (Impressive rolling)
Sasha Vashchenko:
THESE ROLLS
Tyler K. (GM): But you lost valuable time, as his condition is worsening due to the poison
Rex S.:
Tyler K. (GM): Now how are you going to get him a mile+ back to the road?
Sasha Vashchenko: "Aight aight... these took a way ta much... but it worked aye... now... Horny, heal these guy up!"
"Before it dies on us!"
Icarus: "Do you need my help perhaps"
Lucia: "A-Are we sure we want to try and keep this thing?"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ye ye, trust me!"
"Just heal the scary thing!"
"He's sick at any rate, ain't going nowhere"

Lucia sighs a bit as she looks at the ogre. "I'll do what I can..."
Lucia:
Tyler K. (GM): Are you going to use a spell or a medicine check?
Zared: ".....This is your first time doing this isn't it?"
Tyler K. (GM): I see
Sasha Vashchenko: "Not at all!"
"Wait... ye ain't got any fancy spells on ye?"
"Like... huzaa, heal up jibba jabba!"
"Mumbo healing jumbo!"
Lucia: "I cast most of what I had fighting the thing..."
Tyler K. (GM): Alright, you manage to sort of stabalize the ogre, but all of your techniques seem to be failing at improving the condition. you can ascertain from your experience in the field that it might be due to the arcane nature of the ailment
Sasha Vashchenko: "Uhn... well at any rate... I did damage just to wind this oaf up, not kill..."
"So prolly ain't going to die on us, aye?"

Icarus whistles innocently
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ye sure you got no healing juice?"

Zared glares at the monk "Probably. But how the hell is the town going to take us bring him down."
Tyler K. (GM): Zared raises a good point
Sasha Vashchenko: "Eh? We tell 'em he's a... buh.. dunno!"
"We'll figure it out!"
"Ehy meanwhile... check the cave for loot 'n whatnot!"
Icarus: "Best laid plans..."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Maybe they got a healin' potion or something!"

Lucia does what she can for the ogre, so it's at least not dying from injuries. "I don't know what I can do about the poison..."
Sasha Vashchenko: "I'll stay near the oaf, just in case he wakes up and decide to try having a bite at us, aye?"
Icarus: "We've got potions but I ain't wasting them on this lost cause"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Eh, how many we got?"
Icarus: "Didn't the priestess give us three?"
Sasha Vashchenko: "I ain't got any!"
Lucia: "T-The potions wouldn't do anything anyways, it's the poison killing it, not injury..."
Icarus: "I don't know who was holding them?"
Sasha Vashchenko: She begins pondering "But with the potion it can survive more easily... ye... let's pop one for the big oaf!"
Icarus: sigh "How about you hold onto one and pop it if it looks like he's going"
Sasha Vashchenko: Her eyes glimmer "Think about it Horny! We make a ogre friend! Turn him to our side! Then maybe goblins too will turn peaceful! Maybe orcs!"
"Ain't that watcha want?"
"And I want a ogre subordinate!"
"We both win!"

Lucia just gives a bit of an exasperated sigh. "It would be nice, but it thinks I'm a demon..."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Well he's half right!"
"And we beat him half to death!"
"So he got his rightful punishment for that!"
"We'll tell him yer a goat instead!"
Icarus: "How are we even meant to heal him?"
Sasha Vashchenko: "With da potions, duh!"
Tyler K. (GM): While this thrilling conversation is going on, you said someone is looking for treasure?
Sasha Vashchenko: (I'd assume Zared)
Zared: (I am now. Let me do the check)
Icarus: "But she just said..."

Icarus is losing his composure
Tyler K. (GM): You don't need to do a check
Sasha Vashchenko: "It's a potion of healing, so it heals!"
Icarus: (gib tresure pls)
Tyler K. (GM): You find an unlocked chest towards the back in the room of the warband's boss, filled with plunder
Icarus: "Luci can you be the voice of reason please, it's not my strong suit"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Look look, 'tis part of me share anyway! Next healin' potion I will forfeit, alright?"
Tyler K. (GM): The contents come out to 750 copper, 180 silver, 62 electrum, 30 gold, and three vials of perfume
Sasha Vashchenko: " 'Sides, we got horny! We barely need potions!"
Icarus: "Your funeral"
Zared: "Hey Icarus...Help me out with all this loot. It'll take your mind off our 'leader's' great plan."
Icarus: (the fuck is electrum?)
Sasha Vashchenko: (A currency type)
Tyler K. (GM): (Also, how are you going to haul this ogre to the road, which is about a mile and a half away)
Sasha Vashchenko: (I am planning to heal the fucker)
Tyler K. (GM): (Long story short, you're not going to heal him here)
You A:
Don't know what the fuck is wrong with him
B: Don't know how to fix it
Icarus: "So how'dyou wanna split these sweet gains?"
Sasha Vashchenko: (Gonna feed it a healing potion, duh)
Tyler K. (GM): C: Even if you did, you have no tools to do so

Lyei H. sighs again. "L-Look, I can try to make an antitoxin if you insist, but if that doesn't work, keeping it alive might as well be t-torture."

Lucia did that
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ugh... ehy, I gotta an idea... I'll bring the cart over here, so we can carry both the chest and the thing!"
"And don't ye dare shifting it around! Keep 'im alive!"
She heads out to find the cart and bringing it this way
Assuming that is possible based on the terrain and whatnot

Zared was rummaging through the contents of chest "Honestly...I say you me and Horny keep what's in this chest. Sasha already got a treasure to last a lifetime right?" he said with a smirk on his face
Icarus: "Sure I bet a living ogre's gotta be worth at least as much as what's here"
Tyler K. (GM): You might be able to get it about a half mile out from the sight, but past that its impassable
site*
Zared: "Heh! See great minds think alike!"
Sasha Vashchenko: She then doesn't do that and instead opt to just carrying the ogre over the card "Oi, ye two, instead of babbling, help me carrying the oaf!"
Cart
Lucia: (Did my post thing not go through or what)
Sasha Vashchenko: (Which one?)
Lucia: http://puu.sh/uArbW/bda8c0fb44.png
Icarus: (last thing you said was anti-toxin)
Sasha Vashchenko: (I think Lucia wants to make the anti-toxin)
Icarus: (man your text window is tiny,I strech mine the fuck out)
Lucia: (I was just wondering if you even saw it since there was no response to it)
Icarus: (we're too busy in our own worlds)
Sasha Vashchenko: (I didn't, I saw the anti-toxin part though)
(And replied to it)
(As in the "Did that" was lost to me)
Tyler K. (GM): So, are you going to try and make an anti-toxin?
Lucia: (Then I'm not seeing your reply for it)
(But she's offering to if Sasha wants her to make one)
Sasha Vashchenko: Sasha welcomes all help
Icarus: "So whaddya need for the anti-tox anyway since Sasha doesn't appear to be dropping this any time soon?"
Lucia: (Good question, what do I need?)
(I already have a herbalism kit)
Tyler K. (GM): You can make another medicine check to see if you can pinpoint what you might need
Your first one only stabalized the condition, and was indeterminant of the exact nature, save that it's magical
Lucia:
Tyler K. (GM): You've vaguely heard of cases like this, where the reality warping nature of sorcerer's having an adverse affect on the psyche and body of living beings. You don't think you'll be able to find the ingredients for it in the forest, however, there might be a chance you'd find them in town, or at least where to get them
If anyone knows anything about magic, you might be able to parse some information as well
Icarus: (when you say someone, do you mean me, cuss I'll Arcana check if it'll help)
Tyler K. (GM): You can
Icarus:
(gg boiis)
Tyler K. (GM): You've had this happen before, where people around you have succumb to sickness after either intense or prolonged exposure to your leaking arcane energy into reality
You vaguely remember them having to have the arcane energy drawn out of them
Into some sort of conduit
(TLDR: Its magical rad poisoning)
Icarus: "You know this reminds me of a similar poisoning, the guy was on his deathbed for weeks,they had to find an acane specialist and everything. This could end up a serious sidetrack if we're not lucky"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Well... either way, seems like we ain't fixing this here... cheers for trying though!"

Lucia grumbles a bit, partly in thought. "M-Maybe we could find something in town...I-I don't know though..."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Now help me carryin' this thing!"
Zared: "....Sasha do you really want this thing?
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ye... hence why I am wastin' time trying ta get it"
"Now give me a hand here!"
Icarus: sigh
Zared: "Fine...."

Lucia doesn't really seem to like it, but helps if everyone else is going to.
Zared: "Horny. When we get town. Sasha is gonna help you out with trying to fix it."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Yup! Now let's go!"

Zared would then then run over to the cart with the contents of the plundered chest on his back
Sasha Vashchenko: "Oi, where ye running? Help us carrying the ogre!"

Zared "Don't wanna forget the value stuff do we." he said before placing everything he had onto the cart where he could find room for it and running over to the ogre "Alright. Let's get'em up!"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ugh... aight then..."
Tyler K. (GM): Alright, you strap him down, and get him on the cart
The Oxen seems to be struggling with the particularly heavy load
Sasha Vashchenko: "Now... back ta town!"

Lucia is definitely not looking forward to getting back to town

Zared would then go to pet the ox as it buckled under the immense weight "It'll be over with soon." trying to sound as sympathectic as he could
Tyler K. (GM): Is the ogre covered or out in the open?
Do you plan on trying to hide it?
Sasha Vashchenko: Nope
She will stay near it, making sure nobody messed around with the sickened guy though
Tyler K. (GM): The guards come rushing out, a motley crew of four individuals
"HALT, IN THE NAME OF THE TOWNSHIP OF PHANDALIN"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Calm down calm down... we keepin' this as a hire..." She says, waving her hands around to calm down the guards "We already killed the orcs!"
"And the goblins along the road"
"We're basically heroes, y'know?"
"We heroes are eccentric like that, getting ogre henchmen and whatnot!"

Lucia is dreading every moment of this, silently wondering if she'll have to go into hiding againn.
Zared: "Bringing a monster into town. Because that's what heroes do."
Tyler K. (GM): "WE CAN NOT ALLOW SUCH A BEAST INTO TOWN" The slightly dopey guard seems to recite

Icarus is thinking similar to Lucia
Sasha Vashchenko: " 'S fair 'nuff..." She turns to Lucia "Ehy, can ye go grab the sister or something?"
"So ye can heal it out here?"
"I mean the guards have a point, can't have someone like this guy inside a city, innocents could be hurt"
" 'S long as we are out here however we can handle it without anyone else getting hurt!"
Icarus: "I wonder where I'll run off to next, it's been a while since I've literally been run outta a town"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ugh... maybe don't tell her WHO we are healing!"
"Just that someone REALLY needs help!"
How many guards are here anyway?

Lucia mumbles something about her getting hurt, but at least looks to see if anyone else was going to accompany her.
Tyler K. (GM): Four, dressed in slightly rusted and defunct armor. Whatever function these guards may have once served, they certainly aren't fit or equipped to do so now
Sasha Vashchenko: Do they have bows?
Zared: "....Lucy. You want me to go with you?"
Icarus: "I'll go with ya Luci"
Tyler K. (GM): No
Sasha Vashchenko: "Uhn... ye guys look scawny... alright look, keep your distance, so if it wakes up it won't charge straight up at you, aight?"
"Like... bout five to ten feet..."
"And ye, you guys can go, I can wait here I suppose"

Lucia is okay with taking both of them
Zared: "Icarus. You go with Luci. I'll stick around Sasha. As tough as thinks she is. She can't handle her new pet on her own."
Icarus: "Suits me just fine"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ain't a pet... sides, he's quite wounded... but alright then!"
Tyler K. (GM): So you guys seek out the Sister?
Lyei H.: Or the ingredients for the antitoxin or whatever
Tyler K. (GM): Hmmm
I'm just thinking for a sec
Alright
Make an Investigation check to see if you can track down the ingredients on such short notice. From what Icarus remembers, you'll need to find four main components
Icarus:
Tyler K. (GM): Icarus manages to find two of the components
While searching for the other one
Icarus: "Well this has been easier than expected so far, guess it's my lucky day"
Lyei H.: Should I make one too?
Tyler K. (GM): Who else is checking
Yeah
Lucia:
Tyler K. (GM): Lucia manages to find another component of the process, but one more alludes you. Since Icarus made such good time, he could do the check, or someone else can
Icarus:
Sasha Vashchenko: (Sasha is keeping track on the ogre, innit?)
Zared: (That leaves me to do it.)
Icarus: Failing to find the forth item Icarus recruits Zareds help
Lucia: (Sasha and Zared are still with the ogre at the moment)
Zared:
Icarus: (golf clap)
Zared: (That's a fail right?)
Tyler K. (GM): You take an hour, but can't find the component, Lucia, you can take another stab, but the ogre's condition is starting to destabalize with each passing hour
Sasha Vashchenko: "I ain't good with searchin'... ye could still call the sister to help stabilizin' the oaf!"
Lucia:
Tyler K. (GM): With minutes to spare, you manage to find the final component, and rush back outside to where the ogre is lying
Sasha Vashchenko: >lying
Tyler K. (GM): laid
whatever, if you wanna fuck the ogre you can
Sasha Vashchenko: No thank you
I ain't going magical realm
Icarus: (your either getting laid or gettin to lyin)

Lucia makes up the antitoxin for it then, still not liking it much, but she's helping.
Tyler K. (GM): You find a half standing abandoned hut on the outside of town, and build the setup to draw the magical energy out of the ogre and into a charm
You haul the ogre inside and lay him down on the cart's canvas
Zared: "This is a really bad and really dumb idea."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Good, let's make somethin' worth regrettin'!"
Tyler K. (GM): Will the Procedure work? Will you be able to save this ogre that Sasha is shilling for some reason? Find out when we come back from break!
Icarus: "I know right I'm sorta starting to dig it"
Tyler K. (GM): I have to piss like a racehorse
And I want to grab a refill
Icarus: "Maybe it's just because it's not my fault this time"
Tyler K. (GM): So reconvene in like five-ten minutes
Icarus: (brb same)
Sasha Vashchenko: "Look, ye ain't getting it... back with my father, on his ship?"
Lucia: (Hopefully I don't pass out in the break)
Sasha Vashchenko: "We had this ogre pirate he conscripted that one time he were bounty huntin', aye?"
"And that thing was incredible, could do the work of ten men combined, carry a freakin' cannon by himself, ya dig?"
"And after ye got over how dumb he was, he was actually sort of fun to have 'round!"
"Ye just have to offer them a better way of life under yer leadership, they just ain't smart 'nuff to function in a civilization but if yer tell them what to do it works!"

Zared sighs "We aren't going to end up on a boat anytime soon....he's just a extra mouth to feed."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ye but he can carry stuff, he can smash stuff and can throw me like a bullet!"
"Ain't even going to need a sling for that!"
Zared: "Fine."
Icarus: (back)
Zared: "We've done all of this stuff for it. We might as well see it through right?"
Sasha Vashchenko: "That's the spirit!"
"We're adventurer, not mercenaries, we do things outside the box!"

Zared grumble a few choice words under his breath
Sasha Vashchenko: "Mercenaries just kill and do what they're supposed to do... we do ta hell we want to do instead!"
Zared: "Quit it. You're making me sick with the inspirational talk."
ended that with a snicker "You remind me of my sister. She was so annoying when she did that'
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ahah, ye out of yer league, greenie! I was born daughter on a man so eccentric he had me train under a monastery just for the sake of being original!"
"Let's hope we can actually convince him to help us however..."
Zared: "Why wouldn't he help us? He's your dad?"
"Ain't that what parents do?"
Sasha Vashchenko: "I mean da ogre"
Tyler K. (GM): im here, just catching up on this wall of text
Sasha Vashchenko: "I'm planning ta promise sweet food, mead and whatnot, Ogres usually eat shit!"
Zared: "Pfft. We didn't kill him. If anyone is gonna help us. It's this guy."
Sasha Vashchenko: "I still got some of the food we got at the tavern, bit stale but he might enjoy it nonetheless, aye?"
Icarus: "let's just hope he doesn't eat us out of house and home"
Tyler K. (GM): Or eat you outright
Lucia: (Hi I'm still alive)
Tyler K. (GM): Alright, everyone present?
Sasha Vashchenko: (Ye)
Icarus: "I once had this pet dog, cute lil thing, til one day my wild magic sends it into a three story tall tyrannosaur-dog thing"
Sasha Vashchenko: "...honestly, the ogre ain't the most dangerous thin' in the room at the moment..."
Icarus: "Still lovable and kind, but we had to high a pro mage to permanently shrink it cuss it consumed endlessly"
Sasha Vashchenko: "I mean... ye did that to him THIS time..."
Icarus: hire*
Sasha Vashchenko: "... should we gather more ingredients just in case?"
Icarus: "Wild magic is pretty random"
Tyler K. (GM): Whenever you guys are ready
Sasha Vashchenko: (We're all here)
Zared: (I have to go and eat so.)
Icarus: "There's probably only a one in fifty chance of poisoning again"
Tyler K. (GM): The process involves the original source giving a sort of kickstart to begin to "siphon" the energy out into a conduit, which is a featherwood amulet, fitted with a gemstone about the size of a palm
The amulet
not the gemstone
So Icarus, I'm gonna have you make an arcana check
Icarus:
Tyler K. (GM): You understand that too little energy, and you risk not starting the transfer at all, and too much and you risk tearing him asunder. However, you manage to find a nice sweet spot and begin the flow of energy into the amulet. However, the flow needs to be maintained at a constant flow
And someone will need to keep him from running a fever
This process is likely to take all night
Icarus: "Easy peasy as mama's blackberry pie"
Lucia: (Assuming I can try to keep him healthy?)
Sasha Vashchenko: Sasha and Lucia can prolly take turns for that, ye?
Or Lucia solo, whatever helps the most
Tyler K. (GM): You can assist her, but its probably best to leave it to a professional
Sasha Vashchenko: (All yours Lyei))
Lucia:
Tyler K. (GM): Sasha's help gives you advantage on your roll
You manage to stabalize him through the first portion of the night
Icarus, make an arcana check
Icarus:
Tyler K. (GM): Your flow is beginning to destabalize, but you manage to hold on for another hour
Roll again for arcana
Icarus:
Tyler K. (GM): You manage to right yourself, and restabalize the flow
Lucia, another medicine check please
I'll assume Zared is standing guard
Lucia:
Tyler K. (GM): He's barely holding on, but you manage to keep him below critical for another few hours
Icarus: "Man this is exhausting"
Tyler K. (GM): The process is nearing completion, but you've still got a few more hours to go
One last push
Sasha Vashchenko: "Makin' your own path always is..."
Tyler K. (GM): Roll Arcana and medicine
Icarus:

Lucia stifles a yawn...or at least tries to. "No kidding..."
Lucia:
Tyler K. (GM): Towards the very end of the ritual, you feel your magic sputtering, Lucia manages to restabalize the ogre, if you don't restabalize the field, you risk all of the energy from the amulet flowing back into him at once
Icarus: (pls explode, pls explode, pls explode)
Tyler K. (GM): Roll Arcana, and if you want you can gain advantage on it but it'll trigger the table
Sasha Vashchenko: (Can I give him advantage by holding onto my rabbit foot?)
Icarus: (nah I'll take my chances)
Tyler K. (GM): Take your chances as in not going for the table?
Icarus: (yeah)
Tyler K. (GM): Sasha, you still want to help him out?
Sasha Vashchenko: (Ye)
Sasha be helping however she can
Tyler K. (GM): (If there's no rules on the rabbit foot officially, i'm houseruling that it can only be used once per two long rests, at the GM's discretion)
(sound good?)
Sasha Vashchenko: Rabbit Foot power, activate!
(ye)
(just don't kill me ogre)
(or we won't have a new shrek movie)
Icarus: (I wish to be covered in ogre guts if this goes tits up)
Tyler K. (GM): The field wavers
And wavers
Icarus seems to be just barely maintaining it, the mental exhaustion pushing him to the brink
In the last minutes of the ritual, he seems to be passing out
But
By either divine luck
Tyler K. (GM): Or force of Will
The transfer is complete, seconds before Icarus passes out
Conking his head on the way down
Sasha Vashchenko: "Oi! Check the mage and make sure he ain't too strained, I'll care for big guy over here"
Tyler K. (GM): The ogre still seems to be passed out, but his breathing is easier
Sasha Vashchenko: She goes to check the ogre and give a light slap to try and wake him up "Oi... oi... buddy... wake up... helloooo..."

Lucia would go to check on Icarus then, making sure he didn't hurt himself too badly with the head conking
Sasha Vashchenko: "Grunk? Gruuuuunk?"
Tyler K. (GM): Grunk is still non responsive
Sasha Vashchenko: "Guess we'll have to rest up until he awakes..."
"Mage boy might need to rest too, aye?"
She just prepares herself to rest for a while "Alright... Zared will keep first watch... then Horny... then me, sounds good?"

Lucia grumbles. "I just stayed up most of the night keeping your ogre alive...You keep watch..."
Zared: "I'll cover both shifts."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Uhn, ye sure? We can split between us two"
"Sleepin' is needed"
Zared: "It's fine."
Lucia: (And couldn't some sleep have been had while Lucia and Icarus were working anyways?)
Sasha Vashchenko: (Sasha was helping)
(Zared guarding)
"As you wish... do wake me up if anythin' happens though..." She prepares to regain some hours of needed sleep

Icarus is out cold
Sasha Vashchenko: (So basically fast forward until the ogre is back up)

Lucia makes sure it isn't anything more than exhaustion then before moving him to a comfortable sleeping position and getting some sleep herself.
Tyler K. (GM): Alright

Zared would then walk over to the ogre and sit beside it "Grunk huh...Guess you're one of us now." would then give the ogre a few taps on the shoulder "You better be worth it." he cross his arms and activate guard mode
Tyler K. (GM): So are you securing the ogre at all?
Sasha Vashchenko: (The ogre is still tied down I assume)
(And Zared is keeping watch over him)
Lucia: (Besides it being tied?)
Tyler K. (GM): I was wondering if it was still tied
Sasha Vashchenko: If it wasn't, it is after we're finished
Tyler K. (GM): Alright
So about a day passes, and in the early morning of the second day, you hear a stirring from the inside of the cabin while Lucia is checking up on Grunk
Sasha Vashchenko: As soon as she is awake, she runs towards the cabin to check on Grunk
Tyler K. (GM): (btw, for anyone keeping track, that was one long rest)
The ogre seems to wake up
He's still under the effects of the stabalizing medicines that Lucia used
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ehy... buddy! How are you?"
Tyler K. (GM): "W-WHERE GRUNK?"
His eyes are half open
Sasha Vashchenko: "Oh well, let me explain..."
Icarus: "Urg where Icarus?"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Now we almost killed you, right? But then I decided to save you!"
Tyler K. (GM): "G-Grunk recognize voice"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Boy, you made me worry, almost dying like that..."
Tyler K. (GM): "THAT PUNCH LADY'S VOICE"
"LADY PUNCH GRUNK"
"LADY MAKE GRUNK HURT"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Yeah, but only to heal you!"
"See, you aren't sick anymore!"
Tyler K. (GM): Grunk tries to raise an arm, struggling against his restraints
Icarus: "Did she punch me too cuss I feel damn sore"
Tyler K. (GM): He's too doped up to break out
Sasha Vashchenko: "No no no sshhh... you're still wounded..."
Tyler K. (GM): "YOU TIE GRUNK UP, LIKE GRUNK'S FRIENDS"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Only because you wanted to kill my friend!"
"Now, I have a proposition... a real super cool one!"
"This is going to be great Grunk... really..."
Tyler K. (GM): "GRUNK HUNGRY"
Sasha Vashchenko: "How about... you join us!"
Icarus: "Use smaller words"
"He's a ogre after all"
Zared: "Fight with us Grunk!"
Sasha Vashchenko: "I have some pork and potatoes... ur..." She checks her backpack and bring out a bowl hapazardly sealed "Open the mouth you big oaf!"
"It's a bit stale... but it's perfectly edible, trust me, I am still eating it!"

Lucia is keeping her distance from the now awake ogre.
Tyler K. (GM): "GRUNK SMELL SOMEONE"
"SMELL LIKE"
"SMELL LIKE DEVIL LADY"
"DEVIL LADY HURT GRUNK
"MAKE GRUNK TUMMY HURT"
Sasha Vashchenko: "And now tummy is well!"
"Look Grunk... we started on the wrong foot..."
"We were angry at each other..."
"We tried to kill each other..."
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20-2
(
3
)-2
= 1
Tyler K. (GM): Roll a persuasion check
Sasha Vashchenko: "But personally? I think you're just misunderstood, isn't that right? I doubt you like being tied down or chained or things like that..."
Lucia: "U-Um...I-I'm not a devil...I-I'm...A g-goat! Y-Yeah!"
Sasha Vashchenko: (Advantage for holding food?)

Zared couldn't help but snicker at half-tief's words.

Lucia can't believe she just said that
Tyler K. (GM): "IT TRUE, GRUNK NOT LIKE BEING TIED UP. BUT THEY SAY IT GOOD FOR GRUNK, AND IF FRIEND SAY IT GOOD FOR GRUNK, IT MUST BE"
Sasha Vashchenko: "But are they really your friend?"
"I mean, if you were MY friend I wouldn't tie you down to a rock with chains..."
"I would share part of my loot with you, give you food and sweet mead!"
Tyler K. (GM): Roll persuasion again
Sasha Vashchenko:
(Christ)
Lucia: (Kek)
Sasha Vashchenko: (I know I have -2 but these rolls, man)
Icarus: "Ugh let me handle this"
Zared: "You sure you don't want me to do this...I can 'show' him the right way."
Icarus: "Grunk, buddy what we have for you is a great offer of friendship, see by bad luck, you got poisoned, but we saw you suffering and all that and we saved you. And now that we've stopped you from dying we want you to join us, fight tussle with some bad guys, eat good food, travel. it's a great deal mam I'm tellin you, whole package deal here."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Let the mage boy try... he got that sort of aura of smugness that might just work"
Icarus: man*
Sasha Vashchenko: "I'll even buy you a big pirate hat!"
"Deal of a lifetime!"

Zared whispers to sasha "If mage and me can't bring him over to our side...We're putting him down. Just know that."
Icarus:
Tyler K. (GM): "IT TRUE, YOU DID SAVE GRUNK, BUT YOU TAKE GRUNK TO STRANGE PLACE, YOU TIE GRUNK UP"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Well if you agree to become our friend we'll untie you, right away, guaranteed!"
Tyler K. (GM): "GRUNK NOT SURE IF YOU NOT LIKE GRUNK OTHER FRIENDS"
Icarus: "Well we can fix that right now, promise not to try n hurt of us and we'll untie you quick as that"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Look look... did your friends even try to heal you of your wounds?"
"Did you friends even care to ask you for your friendship instead of just yelling at you?"
"Or offer you food... or offering to buy you a hat..."
"Beside Grunk... I... I-I..." She blushes a little "To... tell the truth..."
Tyler K. (GM): One more Check
Lucia: (What)
Icarus:
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20-2
(
5
)-2
= 3
Sasha Vashchenko: "When I saw you throw that orc across the room... I knew you were the one... I... I want... I want you... to throw me at people... so I can kick them in the head at incredible speeds..."
"So please... be our friend Grunk!"
Tyler K. (GM): "IF FEED GRUNK, GRUNK PROMISE NOT TO RIP AND TEAR"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Deal!"
Zared: "Well at least he's easy to please."
Tyler K. (GM): Grunk promptly flexes hard, and the restraints rip off
Sasha Vashchenko: "Just follow my word Grunk! We'll go far you and I!"
Tyler K. (GM): A loud roar comes through, and he stands to his full height
Sasha Vashchenko: "Especially I, if you throw me!"
She just keep talking unphased by the roar
Tyler K. (GM): "LET GO GET FOOD"
Sasha Vashchenko: "That's the spirit! However..."
"I want to ride your back!"
"That's non-negotiable"
Zared: "H-He's not a horse.

Lucia wants all of none of this. Especially at the roar.
Sasha Vashchenko: "Oh by the way" She hands Grunk her bowl of pork and potatoes "It's all the fresh food I have at the moment but it will work!"
"Next time we're in town I'll have them cook you a whole god damn ox!"
Tyler K. (GM): Grunk seems unphased by your request
He seems to just be happy to get food
Being nearly poisoned to death by a tear in the fabric of reality really works up an appetite
Sasha Vashchenko: "Grunk and Sasha, Sasha and Grunk! They will write child fables about us!" She says and after giving the ogre the bowl, she attempts to climb onto his shoulder
Tyler K. (GM): The ogre seems non-phased by this turn of events
Sasha Vashchenko: "Onward to greatness!" She looks at the rest of the companions "See? See? Isn't this the best thing ever?"
"I can even pretend I'm a parrot up here! Squack, Sasha wants cracker!"

Zared is just beyond lost right now. Reality seems to have snuck away from him as he can't believe what he is witnessing

Lucia looks way too scared to think this is the best thing ever.
Sasha Vashchenko: "Man, I must say Horny... you really sold me on that pacifist crap... without you I was all kill this and murder that... but maybe there is something to befriending monsters instead of just punching them to death!"
"Anyway, we go to the wailer now, yes? The Banshee"
"Grunk from now on just do what I tell ya, alright? We're going to meet with some scary stuff and I don't want you to get hurt fighting a mean spirit, gotcha?"
"Unless I tell you but I probably won't"
Tyler K. (GM): Grunk wipes his mouth
"GRUNK STILL HUNGRY"
Icarus: "One of us should stop by town quickly and grab some extra plates for Grunk"
Sasha Vashchenko: She makes herself comfortable on the monster's shoulder "Yeah, that can work... I'll pay the gold for it, he is my responsability anyway..."

Zared "The hell. It was my idea to let the goblins go first!"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Grunk, do you prefer meat or potatoes?"
"Yeah but Horny is cuter"
Zared: "...."
Tyler K. (GM): I still think you're cute Zared
Sasha Vashchenko: (OgrexZared
Tyler K. (GM): And who's opinion is better than God?
Icarus: "Guess I'll go get it"

Icarus hand Grunk a ration "Here naw on this until I get back big guy"

Zared opens his mouth to say something only to cut himself short and let out a low growl "I can't...That's not fair."
Tyler K. (GM): (naw'm'sayin smh tbh fam kangsnsheit)
Sasha Vashchenko: "Aww Zared... getting all flustered gives a nice shade to your skin... classic half-orc charm..."
Zared: "S-Stop it..."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Whaaaat? Stuttering now? Just from the attention of a girl more scars than boobs? Ara ara~"
(Anyway, we can probably fastforward to after we payed enough gold to feed Grunk and then heading to the banshee)
(How much will I have to refund Icarus, Tyler?)
Tyler K. (GM): Roll a knowledge check for how much an ogre can eat
Sasha Vashchenko: (Just buy an ox and tell them to cook it)
Tyler K. (GM): If you want
Sasha Vashchenko: (How much was it for an ox?)
Tyler K. (GM): Zared goes to town with thirty gold in his pocket
(Also, you guys still have that chest of stuff
Might not be a great idea to travel with it
)
Sasha Vashchenko: (Tell them, Sasha doesn't even know what's in the box)
Tyler K. (GM): Oy, you fuckers have a lot of money
You're gonna get robbed
Sasha Vashchenko: (They do)
(I got my good 'ol 33 gold)
Zared: (We never got a chance to split.)
Sasha Vashchenko: (So yeah, how much to feed Grunk?)
(Is an ox worth of meat enough?)
Tyler K. (GM): If you're just getting an ox, 30 gold
It'll be enough to keep him happy for the day
Sasha Vashchenko: (Ox bought)
(Let's continue to the Banshee)
Tyler K. (GM): Alright, Icarus, you get weird looks as word gets out that you tried to bring in a captured Ogre
Are you guys seriously not going to make sure your money is safe?
Icarus: (isn't it like with the cart, with the others?)
Sasha Vashchenko: (Guys this is for you: are you going to make sure the money is safe')
(Since Sasha doesn't even know if there is a jingle jangle in there)
Icarus: (I assume it's safe if it's with you on the damn cart)
Sasha Vashchenko: (I think Tyler wants you to bring it to a bank)
Tyler K. (GM): I wouldn't go travelling long distances with well over 1000 gold
Exposed
In a cart
Icarus: (we have that much?)
Lucia: (Do banks even exist?)
Zared: (Yea...I'm pretty sure we don't)
Sasha Vashchenko: (>over 1000)
Tyler K. (GM): Close, let me see
Its at least 600+
Sasha Vashchenko: 750 copper, 180 silver, 62 electrum, 30 gold,
Not even close
Electrum is worth like
Hang on
I'll do the math
Icarus: "Zared come with me and lug the chest with you we should find someone to hold are gold for us"
our*
Sasha Vashchenko: Alright
7.5 copper 18 silver 31 electrum
Tyler K. (GM): Ok, so its not nearly that much
It comes out to a little under 200
Sasha Vashchenko: So it's a total of 86.5 gold coins
Tyler K. (GM): Electrum is 2 Gold
Sasha Vashchenko: What
Tyler K. (GM): https://dnd5e.info/equipment/currency
Icarus: (Why the fuck is electrum more that gold?)
Tyler K. (GM): wait
nevermind
Fuck it, its a lot of money
Sasha Vashchenko: Kek
So copper is worth 100 gp?
Icarus: (so it's worth half a gold)
Sasha Vashchenko: Electrum is worth HALF a gold
Tyler K. (GM): DO YOU HEAR THAT? IT SOUNDS LIKE ROCKS

Zared nods and follows behind the mage
Icarus: (still quite a bit)
Sasha Vashchenko: The total contaned in the chest is 86.5
Worth in gold coins
Tyler K. (GM): IT'D BE A SHAME IF THEY FELL AND EVERYONE DIED
Sasha Vashchenko: ANYWAY YES GO ON
BANK THE ENDLESS TREASURE WE GOT
VERY WELL OVER SIX BILLION SHECKLES
OY VEY
Tyler K. (GM): SEVEN GORILLIAN SHECKLES
IN THE BANK
Icarus: "Does anyone want to carry some of the gold on them, or store some they already have on them with a rest?"
Sasha Vashchenko: Also I bet everyone is super thrilled I wasted this session over a freaking ogre that will die after a week
"Yeah sure"
Icarus: "Also what are we doing with this perfume?"
Micah Zared: "Sasha and Grunk needs it way more than most of us."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ehy Grunk, want to hold the shinies for us?"
(also I'm not sure if I asked yet but can I take the talisman used to heal Grunk?)
(As keepsake)
Micah Zared: "I'll leave my cooper pieces in the bank."
Tyler K. (GM): Sure

Micah Zared goes to leave all six hunderd of his pieces from the goblin escape in the bank
Sasha Vashchenko: (Or just have them give you 6 gold pieces for the sake of not carrying 3 tons of copper with you at all times)
Icarus: rolling 750+600
750+600
= 1350
Tyler K. (GM): Alright guys, I'm sorry I've gotta cut another session short, but I've gotta go, you guys passed a lot of hard checks today and managed to save an ogre, however much XP you need to level up, you get that
Sasha Vashchenko: Was the sure for the talisman or the bank?
Tyler K. (GM): Yes
Sasha Vashchenko: That
Wasn't a yes or no question
Tyler K. (GM): mmmhmmm
Micah Zared: (Or I'll what sasha said because why not)
Icarus: (threshold for lvl 3 is 900XP I believe)
Sasha Vashchenko: Anyway, we default to 900?
As XP
Tyler K. (GM): Uh, nevermind
200 XP
I thought it was way lower
200 XP for each person
Sorry
Sasha Vashchenko: So we are at 838, for future reference
Tyler K. (GM): Wait
Wait
Wait
Icarus: (whelp only 62XP away now)
Tyler K. (GM): ok
That sounds good
You'll level up sometime mid next session
Sasha Vashchenko: I bet everyone is super happy
Tyler K. (GM): Alright, gg
Gotta blacst
Sasha Vashchenko: gg no re
Icarus: (gg no re bois)
Tyler K. (GM): fuck
Rex S.: The gang's all here!
Tyler K. (GM): Roll call
Icarus: (yo)
(I'm eating tho)
Lyei H.: Ayy
Devily: kkk ready
Tyler K. (GM): alrighbt
so
last time
You spent the whole session trying to save an ogre
now
Lyei H.: Now the ogre dies within the first minute of gaming
Tyler K. (GM): Banshee business
So
Sasha Vashchenko: Is chilling on Grunk's shoulders while travelling
Icarus: (I assume we'll need a map for this bit in case things goes tits up)
Tyler K. (GM): You're fine so far

Micah Zared stares up at their crazy leader and sighs "You know most people ride on horses and oxs right?" said none ironically
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20
(
14
)
= 14
Tyler K. (GM): You travel to the ruins of Conyberry without incident
Sasha Vashchenko: "I ain't most people"
Icarus: "Clearly"
Tyler K. (GM): The forest grows dark and still as the trail winds deeper into
the trees. Heavy vines and thick layers of moss drape the
branches, and the air is noticeably colder than it was in the
ruined village. Rounding a bend in the trail, you see a screen
made from the warped branches of trees standing close
together, woven into a domelike shelter in the shadows. A low
Tyler K. (GM): doorway leads inside
Icarus: "Perhaps a running theme in our group"
Lucia: (Didn't we level up last session)
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ugh... spirit business... Grunk listen to me now... we're going to meet some super spooky ghost, so don't go smashing unless I tell you to because otherwise... it will eat our ears!"
Icarus: (nope)
Sasha Vashchenko: "And we like our ears, right?"
(Nope)
(We have 838 XP total)
Tyler K. (GM): you guys have like 60 xp to go
Icarus: (we close tho)
Micah Zared: "I like my ears."
Not as much as my tusks...But...That's besides the point.
Tyler K. (GM): As you travel through the ruins of Conyberry, you come across an unnatural shack, dilapitated and worn, with thick vines growing and forming a sort of organic doorway
Lucia: "I hope this doesn't go t-too badlly though.."
Tyler K. (GM): The trees around this area are thick, and it matches the description that the Sister gave you
Sasha Vashchenko: "Like... I have a bad feeling about this Grunk..."
Icarus: "It'll be fine, just sweet talk her a little and it'll be roses"
Sasha Vashchenko: (Grunk-a-grunk-a doo!)
Tyler K. (GM): Brief refresher

Micah Zared would somehow end up as the person last in the group. He was actually behind the giant orge. How about that?
Tyler K. (GM): Sister wants to talk to the banshee because of her skill with divination, attempting to find a book of a mage.
She gave you a comb, a gift to bribe the banshee, taking advantage of her vanity
Sasha Vashchenko: (Who has the comb?)
Icarus: (I might as well if no one else)
Sasha Vashchenko: (YOU NEED TO TRACK THAT STUFF IN YOUR INVENTORY)
Icarus: (fine not me then lololo;)
Tyler K. (GM): So, you're standing outside the overgrown shack
Wat do
Sasha Vashchenko: "Er..."
She clear her throat
Icarus: "So anyone have a plan"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Anyone there? We got... tribute!"
Icarus: "Or you know we just gonna wing it"
Micah Zared: I'd like a plan for this.
Sasha Vashchenko: "E-ehy! Next time say your plan before hand!"
Icarus: "I ain't gotta plan"
Tyler K. (GM): A strong wind blows and rustles the heavy treeline
Barely any light penetrates the thick canopy, except in bright shafts
(giggty)
Sasha Vashchenko: She hugs the bald head of Grunk "T-this is too spooky!"
Tyler K. (GM): You are standing outside of the shack
Lucia: "W-Well...Maybe we have whoever's best at talking do it..?"
Sasha Vashchenko: She looks at Icarus
Micah Zared: ...L-Lucia.....I can't scare a ghost.
Sasha Vashchenko: "Well... mage boy... your time to shine!"

Icarus cautiously breaches whatever this makeshift shack considers a door
Tyler K. (GM): The inside is dark and almost no light shines through
A home of sorts is sheltered within the dome of woven
branches. It is sparsely furnished with chests, shelves, a
table, and a reclined couch, all of it old and of elven craft.
Icarus: "Agatha we beseech thee for thy mighty divination, we come bearing a gift"

Icarus presents the comb to the darkness
Tyler K. (GM): The lanterns present on the table and each of the walls light up one by one
A swirling wind can be felt into the room as a transparent shape makes manifest in the air in front of Icarus
A ragged female elf slowly becomes visible as a feeling of dread takes hold over everyone in the room
Pale and glowing, her eyes are shrunken shadows in her skull
Sasha Vashchenko: Which is only Icarus
Tyler K. (GM): Those outside the hut, you notice the vines grow quickly, shutting off any access to the hut
Icarus: (Well fuck you guys)
Lucia: (Well)
Tyler K. (GM): "WHO GOES THERE"
Icarus: "I go by Icarus m'lady"
Tyler K. (GM): She turns to you, and you catch sight of her recessed and haggard features
Sasha Vashchenko: "Wouldn't it be hilarious if we just ran away and left him here?"
Tyler K. (GM): The banshee mock laughs
Sasha Vashchenko: "As a prank"
Lucia: "M-Maybe we should have gone in with him..."
Sasha Vashchenko: She shrugs and shake her head "Nah, he's fine!"
Tyler K. (GM): "Such politeness, tell me 'Icarus', what brings you to my domain?"
(ITS JUST A PRANK BRO)
Sasha Vashchenko: (LOL)
Tyler K. (GM): (THE CAMERAS ARE RIGHT THERE)
Icarus: "I come in search of a tome once owned by a mage of great power by the name of Bowgentle"
"I was told your divination was unmatched"
Micah Zared: We...I mean I like Icarus...But...I mean...If he's dead he's dead right?
Sasha Vashchenko: "Nah he got it"
She just wave her hands, not troubled at all
Tyler K. (GM): The comb evaporates from your hand and reappears into hers with a smokey pop
"And I assume this is for me?"
Icarus: "Of course, such a beautiful jeweled accessory is only fit for one as yourself"
Tyler K. (GM): Vague shadowy shapes watch the rest of the group from the trees. They don't attack, but simply watch
She smiles
"Ohoho, such flattery will get you far with me" She summons an astral mirror that shimmers in the air, examining the comb as it passes through her ghastly hair
"Very well, I presume you speak of Bowgentle?"
(You do)
Icarus: "I do my grace"
Lucia: (He even said it a while ago)
Icarus: (I ain't telling her that)
Tyler K. (GM): She sighs in an exasperated tone
Lucia: (Icarus: "I come in search of a tome once owned by a mage of great power by the name of Bowgentle" )
Tyler K. (GM): "Well, I'll see what I can do"
Icarus: "Thank you my grace"
Tyler K. (GM): Her eyes roll back and glow as she searches for the information you requested
Lucia: (Oh wait I get what you mean now)
Tyler K. (GM): "The book left my possession over a century ago"
"The man who held it was named Tsernoth of the City of Iriaebor"
"A necromancer. Unsavory lot"
"I know not unfortunately what became of him after I traded the tome"
Icarus: "Indeed your grace, very unsavory, a thousand thanks for your time"
Tyler K. (GM): She Smiles And evaporates into the air, the comb reappearing on the table at the center of the room
The vines recede and you are permitted to leave
Micah Zared: "That was.....Easier than I thought."

Lucia peeks in after the vines go to see what happened

Icarus exits just as cautiously as he entered
Sasha Vashchenko: "Told ya!"
Tyler K. (GM): The shapes watching you dissapeer from the treeline one by one, melding into the shadow
Sasha Vashchenko: She keeps waving her hands "He totally had this!"
Micah Zared: You thought about leaving the poor guy.
Sasha Vashchenko: He pats Grunk's head a couple of times like a drum "We got this! We're the best!"
Lucia: "Y-Yeah, you shush..."
Icarus: "See nothing to it"
Sasha Vashchenko: "I thought that as a prank!"
"You were the one talking about him being dead!"
Lucia: "N-Not a very funny one..."
Micah Zared: "Likely sto-...Hey!"
Sasha Vashchenko: "I had no doubts, hence why I came up with the prank!"
She tsks a couple of times "You need to trust your companions more, greenie!"
Tyler K. (GM): Each of you recieve 50 XP
(To GM) rolling d20
(
2
)
= 2
Icarus: "Still let's get out of here fast just in case she happens to be felling fickle today"

Micah Zared would then snicker and pat the ogre's stomach "I trust the companions who don't pull pranks right Grunk?"
Sasha Vashchenko: (Check those trips))
Tyler K. (GM): On the way back along the trail, you hear a buzzing sound coming from far away
Sasha Vashchenko: "..." She raise and eyebrow, weirded out the half-orc would touch the stomach of another guy
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling 1d8+2
(
4
)+2
= 6
Sasha Vashchenko: "What's wrong with you greenie?"
She shakes her head and sighs "Truly, you need to learn how to interact with people... anyway, yeah, let's go back to town and get our rewards!"
Tyler K. (GM): The buzzing sound grows louder and louder as you get down the trail, your cart bumping slightly as Grunk snacks lightly off of bushes he rips out from the side of the road
Sasha Vashchenko: "Man... you really like your greens, uhn?"
Icarus: "Everyone else can hear that right? Agatha didn't curse me or nothing right?"
Lucia: "W-What is it though..?"
Micah Zared: "I thought it was just flies following Grunk or Sasha."
Or both.
Sasha Vashchenko: She cleans her ear with her pinkie "Mhn... nope, ain't our flies!"
She looks up in the sky or wherever the source of the buzzing seems to be
Tyler K. (GM): Bursting forth from the leaves, six Sturges, giant insectoid creatures with piercing proboscuses emerge from the canopy
They dart for your party, suckers primed and ready
ROLL INITIATIVE
Icarus: "Whelp mystery solved"
Micah Zared:
Icarus:
Lucia:
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling 6d20+3
(
14
+
11
+
5
+
19
+
19
+
3
)+3
= 74
Sasha Vashchenko:
Tyler K. (GM): There seems to be about six of them in total
Sasha Vashchenko: "Grunk, you like bugs right?"
Tyler K. (GM): No map for this one, its a relatively simple encounter
Sasha Vashchenko: (Give us a blank one then, position is always important)
Tyler K. (GM): There
Is that OK?
Lucia: Sure
Icarus: (yep)
Sasha Vashchenko: (Aye)
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20-2
(
4
)-2
= 2
Sasha Vashchenko: (Turn the ogre 'round)
Tyler K. (GM): Aight
Sasha Vashchenko: (UGH)
Tyler K. (GM): So, the first Stirge swoops down and attempts to stab Zared
(To GM) rolling d20+5
(
13
)+5
= 18
Tyler K. (GM): The probe finds its way through a chink in your armor
(To GM) rolling 1d4+3
(
3
)+3
= 6
Tyler K. (GM): Take six damage as it sucks the blood from you
One of them barrels straight for Icarus
(To GM) rolling d20+5
(
19
)+5
= 24

Micah Zared would grit his teeth as he was turned into a snack "B-Bastard! Sasha clean the ogre next time!"
Tyler K. (GM): It attatches to his arm, painfully gripping down
(To GM) rolling d4+3
(
4
)+3
= 7
Icarus: "Hey let go"
Tyler K. (GM): Take 7 damage as it drains a large amount of blood from you, its abdomen swelling red
Sasha Vashchenko: "Pff, it's our natural musk!"
(Also am I on the turn list?)
Tyler K. (GM): Yes, you're up in two
Sasha Vashchenko: (Gotcha, didn't see it myself)
Tyler K. (GM): The next stirge goes up and tries to attatch itself to sasha
Icarus: (why6 aren't I next?)
Lucia: (I disappeared too)
Tyler K. (GM): Son of a bitch
Icarus, you're up

Icarus casts mage armor attempting to hold off further attack 10
Lucia: (Can I get readded to the list too)
Tyler K. (GM): You're on there
Icarus: (the roll was a wild magic check)
Tyler K. (GM): Did it pass?
Lucia: (No I'm not)
Tyler K. (GM): Yes, you are
Icarus: (yeah only triggers on a 1)
Tyler K. (GM): Alright, go
Lucia: http://puu.sh/uKJZo/cbaefc1500.png
(I don't see a Lucia anywhere on there)
Sasha Vashchenko: (Sometimes it happens)
Tyler K. (GM): Updatre it I guess, but its there
Sasha Vashchenko: (I don't see myself either but the DM sees it)
Lucia: (Well whatever
Tyler K. (GM): Icky
you are up
Icarus: (nah I'm done fam)
Tyler K. (GM): You joshin me m8?
Oh
Didn't see that
Mage Armor
Got it
OK
Icarus: (yep)
Tyler K. (GM): Stirge
Sasha
Charges
(To GM) rolling d20+5
(
9
)+5
= 14
Tyler K. (GM): You manage to step out of the way of its charge
One of the Stirges barrels for the ogre
(To GM) rolling d20+5
(
7
)+5
= 12
Tyler K. (GM): It latches on to the folds in his neck and begins sucking a viscous black liquid
"GRUNK NO LIKE BUG"
Sasha
Rex S.: "Z-Zared no like bug either."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ugh... let me just..."
(The bugs are currently ON Zared and Grunk?)
(As in, same space?9
Micah Zared: (Yea on got him in the arm and he's getting drained)
Tyler K. (GM): Yeah
Sasha Vashchenko: First, she tries to get rid of the annoying bug on her
Or at least, in front of her
Tyler K. (GM): It hasn't latched on to you yet
Sasha Vashchenko:
Tyler K. (GM): Your pole swats at air
Sasha Vashchenko: "UGH!" She then goes OVERDRIVE, trying to squash both the bug in front of her and on Grunk
(First one on me, last one on Grunk)
Tyler K. (GM): Which one was which?
Sasha Vashchenko: (Usually, as I list them)
Tyler K. (GM): You don't quite manage to hit the one in front of you, as it buzzes away, but you do manage to pick the one off of Grunk's neck, its abdomen gushing out blood in a blackened thick geyser
Sasha Vashchenko:
Tyler K. (GM): It falls off, fleshy and lifeless from his shoulders
Sasha Vashchenko: "Man, they are BUGGING me out!"
Tyler K. (GM): Grunk picks the bug up and eats it, not understanding the danger of the situation
Sasha Vashchenko: "This kind of stuff does not FLY with me!"
Tyler K. (GM): He promptly spits it out
Micah Zared: "What did we learn Grunk?"
Tyler K. (GM): Another one goes straight for Grunk
(To GM) rolling d20+5
(
17
)+5
= 22
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d4+3
(
4
)+3
= 7
Tyler K. (GM): It manages to land on his huge back, sticking straight into his vein on his right trapezius
It sucks a tremendous ammount of blackened fluid
Grunk still seems relatively unaffected
Sasha Vashchenko: "Damn it Grunk, take those off, you might get an infection!"
"We went through a lot of trouble to cure you already!"
Tyler K. (GM): The Final Stirge barrels straight for Luicia
(To GM) rolling d20+5
(
6
)+5
= 11
Tyler K. (GM): It does not manage to find a spot to latch onto however
Lucia

Lucia ignores the one that missed her for the moment and tries to swat the one on Icarus for him.
Lucia:
Tyler K. (GM): ripperoni
Your quarterstaff swipes at nothing, barely missing Icarus' head
Micah
Icarus: (Luci conks Icarus on the head, a comedy bit ensues)
Micah Zared: (Just Stick to Zared for now please)
Tyler K. (GM): Zared
Micizzle
The Miz
Go
Icarus: (Micahroni)

Micah Zared would pull out his signature warpick and aim for the bug that was closest to him
Micah Zared:
Tyler K. (GM): It swipes at nothing
Jesus come on guys
Sasha Vashchenko: "Grunk, show them how it's done!"
Lucia: (Save us Grunk)
Tyler K. (GM): Grunk grabs at the stirge on him
He throws it against a tree, leaving a large splinter in it
"STOP BUZZ, HURT GRUNK EARS"
Icarus: "Man what is up with you guys today, you're all over the place"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ehy, I did kill one, you still need to do your own!"
"So far I am the only one doing what she is supposed to do!"
"That and Grunk!"
Tyler K. (GM): The Stirge continues to suck out the blood of Zared
(To GM) rolling 1d4+3
(
4
)+3
= 7
Micah Zared: "G-Goddamn it. Get off of me!"
Tyler K. (GM): You take 7 points of damage, as the bloated Stirge detatches and buzzes away
Icarus: "Oh don't worry just cuss it sucked out half my blood in one go doesn't mean I can't handle things"
Tyler K. (GM): Same for Icarus
(To GM) rolling 1d4+3
(
1
)+3
= 4
Tyler K. (GM): Take 4 Dmaage, and the Stirge is nearly full
Icarus, your turn

Icarus casts Shocking Grasp then karate chops the insects schnoz attached to his arm
Icarus:
Sasha Vashchenko: (So)
(You shock yourself?)

Micah Zared would start to flail his attack arm about. "Damn bug. Why didn't you go for the something else?!" his said with the signs of fatigue settling in rapidly
Tyler K. (GM): You bug zap and feel a little jolt, but the mage armor protects you mostly
Icarus: (I'm already charged, where d'you think the electricity is coming from)
Tyler K. (GM): The bloated thing flops off you
Fried
The smell of cooked bug flesh stinks up the air
Icarus: "Few that was close"
Tyler K. (GM): The Stirge in front of Sasha tries to find a place to land
(To GM) rolling d20+5
(
7
)+5
= 12
Tyler K. (GM): You manage to avoid the proboscus
(To GM) rolling d20+5
(
17
)+5
= 22
Tyler K. (GM): The stirge manages to find a place on Lucia's shoulder to latch on to
(To GM) rolling 1d4+3
(
2
)+3
= 5
Tyler K. (GM): Take five damage from blood loss
Sasha
Sasha Vashchenko: (So wait)
Tyler K. (GM): Put your shit down, I need to use the bathroom
Sasha Vashchenko: (How many remains?)
Tyler K. (GM): 3
Sasha Vashchenko: (Alright 3
Tyler K. (GM): back
Sasha Vashchenko: She strikes the bug in front of her first and foremost
Tyler K. (GM): You hit the thing with the hitty stick
It goes splat
Sasha Vashchenko: She then tries to splat the bug on Lucia
Tyler K. (GM): Splatty fist makes big bug go splat
Boom
You get some blood on the party as it splatters everyone
Imagine a Samurai Movie
It looks like a fookin geyser
Sasha Vashchenko: "...I am covered in your blood"
She says that in a cold, blank voice
Tyler K. (GM): There's one stirge left
Lucia

Lucia ignores that comment for the moment and calls down holy fire on the last stirge
Lucia:
Tyler K. (GM): (To GM) rolling d20+3
(
14
)+3
= 17
Tyler K. (GM): It manages to burn the bug in half
Half of it incinerated, and the blood of Zared sloshes out the other half
All of the bugs have been defeated
fanfare
Icarus: "Whelp that sucked"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Ugh... it was just bugs... why do I have to carry you people around?"
Icarus: "Hey I killed mine no problem"
Tyler K. (GM): You gain 30 XP Each
Sasha Vashchenko: She climbs back onto Grunk "Except you, you're reiable!"
918

Micah Zared would be doubly drenched in blood "I should see if there's any goblins around and watch as they beat the crap out of you."
Sasha Vashchenko: Level up
Icarus: (we need to rest before a lvl up aye?)

Lucia breathes a sigh of relief. "E-Everyone alright?"
Tyler K. (GM): You get back to town
Icarus: "Nah I'm missing like, way too much blood to be considered alright"
Tyler K. (GM): Are you planning on going back to the town with Grunk or are you all going to sleep outisde again
Sasha Vashchenko: "Taste like goat!" She says, cleaning her face from the dripping blood
Going into town
Tyler K. (GM): The Guards meet you at the gate
again
"WHAT DID WE SAY THE FIRST TIME"
Micah Zared: "Yeah yeah. Go ahead guys."
Tyler K. (GM): "NO"
Sasha Vashchenko: "No it's fine, we tamed him, he's our friend now"
Tyler K. (GM): "FECKIN"
Lucia: (I could heal people again)
Tyler K. (GM): "OGRES"
Micah Zared: "Just...bring back something to eat...I'm....A bit out of it."
Sasha Vashchenko: "He's cool, 'sides I need to buy him a hat, I can't pick one without him trying them on!"
Tyler K. (GM): The guards stand resolute
Pikes pointed outwards
Lucia: (So, about that healing, does anyone want any?)
Sasha Vashchenko: "Pretty please?"
(I'm unharmed)
Icarus: "I'm feelin pretty light on my feet right now, do I still even have feet? looks down seems so"
Tyler K. (GM): "BY THE AUTHORITY OF THE MAYOR, WE MUST REFUSE"
Micah Zared: "...I'm...I'm fine by the way...Just....R-Really really hungry."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Did the Mayor specifically tell you not to allow our friend Ogre?"
Icarus: (Unless Zared wants to mooch all the heals I could really use some)

Micah Zared could barely keep himself up on his feet. His legs were wobbling.
Sasha Vashchenko: "Come on look at him! Isn't he the cutest?!" He squish Grunk's cheeks together
Tyler K. (GM): "THE MAYOR SAID TO REFUSE ACCESS AND GUARD AGAINST THE ENCROACHMENT OF ANY AND ALL GOBLINOIDS, OGRES INCLUDED"
Icarus: (what's your hp like Greenie?)
Lucia: (How far are the both of you below half)
Micah Zared: (9)
Sasha Vashchenko: "So you refuse entry to half-orcs?"
Icarus: (I at 3 so yeah could probably do with dem heals)
Lucia: (What is half for both of you, and for Grunk too)
Tyler K. (GM): "Half-Orcs are allowed, but are closely monitered as they are sapient and civilized, not wild Beasts like this OGRE"
Lucia: (If I can conserve spells and use channel divinity instead, I'm going to)
Icarus: (half my total hp? 7)
Tyler K. (GM): Grunk didn't really lose much
Icarus: (I assume we're gonna rest soon regardless)
Sasha Vashchenko: She sighs and waves her hand around "You allow them in because they are part of adventuring groups such as us, that kill monsters and keep you safe... ugh, just call the mayor so we can get permission for our friend here!"
Tyler K. (GM): He sends one of them off
The pig mayor comes bumbling up the path
Sasha Vashchenko: "Truly, they have no respect for heroes!"

Micah Zared would then walk over to the guard and growl "So I'm still under your watchful eye even though I've helped your town. Three times now. Good to know."
Tyler K. (GM): "What's the meaning of interrupting my afternoon nap!"
Sasha Vashchenko: "I am sorry Mayor but the soldiers clearly misunderstood your orders... you see, they are blocking our passage into town!"
"Even after we got rid of the raiding problem of those orcs! Look, we even converted the ogre to our cause!"
"And I won't even charge you extra!"
"Free conversion to a good cause, just because I like this village so much!"
"So yeah, can you tell them to allow us in?"
Lucia: (Okay, channel divinity can get Zared and Icarus back to half, so do that)
(Thanks for helping me sort that out in a timely manner by the way)
Micah Zared: (If that's sarcassm my bad)
Lucia: (Of course that's sarcasm)
Sasha Vashchenko: (kek)
Micah Zared: (>.>)
Tyler K. (GM): we livin
Roll persuasion
Icarus: (alternatively roll percussion)
Sasha Vashchenko: (I do have a drum)
Micah Zared: (Do it.)
Sasha Vashchenko:
(Does that do anything?)
Micah Zared: (It made my night)
Sasha Vashchenko:
Tyler K. (GM): He looks up and down
"Hmm. Fine, We'll let him in, but keep him by the stables, we don't want an ogre walking around scaring away commerce"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Yeah sure sure, now can we go through?"
"You have naps to take, we have gold to claim!"
Tyler K. (GM): The guards let you through
Sasha Vashchenko: She pats Grunk on the head "Oi big guy, now don't you go eating or breaking anything, alright?"
Tyler K. (GM): "GRUNK PROMISE"
Sasha Vashchenko: "If you do they will think I'm an idiot!"
"And we both know I am but still, I don't want the word to get out!"
Micah Zared: "I never stopped thinking that."
Sasha Vashchenko: "Yeah well, keep it to yourself!" She winks, then looks back at the group "So... first we claim the gold for the orcs... and the ogre we hired... then banshee and we tell the lady about the book?"
"Or well, Icarus will tell her about the book"
Micah Zared: "I'll get the gold."
Tyler K. (GM): You claim the gold from the secretary
After some brief paperwork,she hands over...
100 gold to be split amongst the four of you
Sasha Vashchenko: (25 each then)
Tyler K. (GM): Icarus, you tell the Sister about the book
Icarus: (we keeping it on us or banking it)
Sasha Vashchenko: ((Sasha will keep it on herself, her 25 anyway)
Tyler K. (GM): She thanks you for the information,and prepares to set off to follow this new lead
Micah Zared: (I kept mine)
Icarus: "If you ever need more help feel free to ask"
Tyler K. (GM): "Maybe one day, when we meet on the road again"
Icarus: "Til we meet again then"
Tyler K. (GM): If you guys want to rest now, you can
Level up and heal and shit
Sasha Vashchenko: LEVEL UP
Tyler K. (GM): After a good nights sleep, and a hearty meal, you walk outside to a band of red bandana'd men standing outside with various sharp pointy things
"Oi, we notice you been around here for a while, and you never payed da toll ta git in ere"
Sasha Vashchenko: "What? We did"
"Don't you remember?"
"And we payed the safety tool too"
Tyler K. (GM): "Its a vital part of da local economa-ecome... markets"
Sasha Vashchenko: "Toll, rather"
She waves her hand around "We already payed it... twice actually, don't you remember?"
Tyler K. (GM): "Pay up, or pay dearly"
Duh duh duh
session end
Sasha Vashchenko: (No come on)
Tyler K. (GM): my head feels like its going to explode
Sasha Vashchenko: (UGH)
(FINE)
Tyler K. (GM): And my internet is acting fucky
Micah Zared: (I had a bad ass moment ready and everything.)
Tyler K. (GM): yay you all level up
doo doo doo doo
you did it
good job
proud of you
Lyei H.: Yay and all but why are all my second level spells blank
Tyler K. (GM): shrug
Icarus: (waddya mean?)
Lyei H.: http://puu.sh/uKPDH/7afe7b40ca.png
Tyler K. (GM):
Icarus: (hmm Iunno)
Rex S.: (what's the exp amount again?)
Lyei H.:
Icarus: (we're at 918)
Devily: ^
Icarus:
Lyei H.:
Shouldn't it be higher DC for higher level spell
Or I'm thinking of PF