The Block Times article: TotalScamCoin Scam

The Block Times article: “TotalScamCoin Scam”
As my Grandmother used to say, a lot closer to the genesis block than now, whenever she refused to give me coins to spend on some fancy new ICO - if it seems too good to be true you need to check the fundamentals. They were wise words then and they are wise words now.
Investors in TotalScamCoin woke up this morning to the news that funds were draining from the TotalScamCoin company account. Watching withdrawal transations on the blockchain explorer in horror with them was TotalScamCoin CFO Ella Patterson.
“I couldn’t believe it,” Patterson told this reporter when I contacted them for comment, “we did everything right. It’s a multisig wallet controlled by TTP-enabled hardware keys with social recovery and long lock times.”
So what went wrong with this best-of-breed security, I asked Patterson. “Wallace used a weakened key for his txes in the genesis block then disguised serieses of increasingly large transactions drawing on them as individual small transactions and submitted that for approval. We checked and signed the small transaction, or at least we thought we did, but Wallace had boiled our frog.”
Matthew Wallace is, or was, TotalScamCoin’s CTO. And the frog? Patterson explains: “We checked the transaction history. [Wallace] had been getting us all to approve longer and longer chains of masked transactions over the last few months. He only cashed out the smallest one in each series, so he trained our security analytics to ignore what he was doing. Like the metaphor of boiling a frog by increasing the temperature a little at a time. By the time they realise they’re cooked it’s too late.”
And this morning it was too late. But why would anyone invest in a coin that claims to be a scam? “The team was stellar and the fundamentals had total solidity,” said psuedonymous financial analyst ATHHunter when I contacted her via direct message, “the name indicated knowledge of hodler culture and served to weed out baghodlers. There wasn’t an iota of doubt in my mind that this was a project that was going to be making waves.”
So what went wrong? Patterson: “It’s clear that this was Wallace’s plan all along, since before the genesis block attack, we all knew him from his previous work but he was willing to burn his reputation out to effect this exit scam. We can only apologize to TotalScamCoin investors and assure them that we are pursuing every option at this time, including a second fork.”
TotalScamCoin investors, many of whom had been co-ordinating a pump in defiance of federal hodling legislation, were rushing to liquidate their hodlings, offloading them onto anyone who will take them. ATHHunter: “There will be a dead cat bounce, there always is, but unless you have a trading bot close to a mining operation I wouldn’t take the risk of being left holding that coin when the music stops. And watch out for pumpers. Always watch out for pumpers.”
Wise words. But as I found out when I checked the smart contract that my Grandmother used to put coins in for me to save for later, you can’t always trust wise words - especially when someone else controls the keys. Well played, Grandma, well played.


Riddle:

They this text came first;
Like God’s first made family;
It made Satoshi Shake his fist;
And burn her into eternal memory;

It includes the date in twenty-o-nine;
Oh tell us, What was written in the Times?