Anonpencil Writes Drunk: Just Blowing Bubbles (Oneshit)

>You sit in the tub and stare down at your toes where they bob just above the waterline. The water's beginning to get a little cold now, but you're reluctant to budge. It still makes you tingle all over, makes your muscles completely relax. Only here can you truly be alone and truly be safe. Only here can you feel peace, quiet, and a sense of calm from your own inner turmoils. Only in this bathroom, in this bathtub, can you forget that you're here in Ponyville. Beyond that bathroom door might as well be your own bedroom, your apartment back on earth. It's a somewhat nice fantasy, even if it is short lived.
>As if somehow the world knows that you're enjoying being at peace, the silence of the bathroom is abruptly shattered by a knock on the door. You let out a groan, trying to drown out the voice that echoes to you from the other side.
"Anoooooon," Twilight whines. "Are you coming out yet? You've been in there like half an hour!"
"No. Fuck off," you growl out.
>You sink down into the tub so that your mouth is just beneath the surface. You blow bubbles out your nose and mouth so they make a light foam around your face, and in your head you make believe that you are a grumpy hippo. Because at least if you were a grumpy hippo this damned pony would leave you alone.
"But Anoooooon," she whines again. "I have to peeeeee. How long does it take for humans to poop anyway? Jeeze."
>You glare at the door and resurface just enough to speak. You spit a long thin stream of bath water in the door's direction between your teeth.
"I'm not pooping, I'm in the bath. And besides, can't you just pee outside? You're a horse."
"But Anoooooooon..."
"I said no. Hold it or go outside."
"But princesses don't pee outside, and it's cold, and besides, this is my castle, and most importantly..."
>You dunk your head down all the way under the water, holding your breath. You shut your eyes and wait, hoping the water all around you will muffle her voice enough for you to again forget what's on the other side of that door. Unfortunately, it just makes her difficult to understand, rather than making her totally inaudible. You let loose a small stream of bubbles and open your eyes, watching as each one pops in front of you. If only your problems could be gone that easily, just in one little pop. Before long, you're out of air and you have to resurface. As you do, you find that she's somehow still talking.
"...and you really REALLY shouldn't be doing it, because I don't even know what that would do to human anatomy to be honest, and also-"
"I SAID NO!" You scream out. "SO FUCK RIGHT Owait what are you saying I shouldn't be doing?"
>You already feel the tightening of apprehension in your throat before she even replies.
"Didn't you hear what I said at all? Dear Celestia, we really need to work on your listening skills. Anyway, I was saying that you shouldn't be in that tub in the first place, because it's not for bathing."
"...i-it's not?"
"Nope!" she says brightly from the other side of the door. "That faucet is a mainline to all the byproducts from my experiments downstairs. All you'll get out of that is magical coolant, chemicals, and I'm pretty sure some form of nuclear waste."
>You stare down in horror at the bath around you. No wonder your skin was starting to tingle.
"WHY do you have that going to a tub in my bathroom!" You shriek at the top of your lungs.
"Because if I didn't, it's get all over the floor, silly!" she says with a giggle.
>You had it in your mouth! It got in your eyes! Dear god, you've seen her spells and experiments before, just imagine what the byproducts could do to you! With a girlish scream you leap out of the tub, then run, naked, shrieking out of the bathroom.
"DISINFECT!" you cry. "I MUST GET TO THE EYEWASH STATION!"
>Twilight watches you round the corner of the hall, leaving a damp trail behind your bare ass, then smiles to herself. She shakes her head as she walks into the bathroom and pulls the door shut behind her.
"I'd knew that'd get him out of here," she says with a sigh as she settles herself onto the toilet.

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