Anon P.I.

>The cigarette's ashes fall into the tray as time slowly creeps forward.
>The T.V. plays some old love story, black and white.
>Casa-blank-a, about a blank flank gal.
>The rain droplets on the window compliment the soft record player in the corner.
>A slow night, as usual.
>However, in this town, a slow night is a blessing in disguise.
>Ponyville.
>Not the most menacing sounding place in the world, but everything good in this world has a dark underbelly.
>The Changeling Mob, roaming gangs of griffons.
>Problems just like any other town.
>And it's your job to stop 'em.
>Well, that's what it says on your card.
>And your door.

>'Anon P.I.'
>It was put there a few months after you arrived in town.
>You always had a knack for finding trouble.
>Well, moreso, trouble found you.
>And more often than not, it wished it didn't.
>After you fought off that griffon gang terrorizing Sugarcube Corner, the people had a respect for you.
>It only made sense to take that respect and knack for trouble being around the corner, and make a job out of it.
>You needed a place to stay, and the Cakes were more than happy to oblige.
>You did, after all, save their joint.
>Their live-in Pinkie was just as excited, and even offered to help out.
>Skip ahead a few months, and here we are.
>Sitting behind your desk, watching sappy romances on the tube.

>"Hiya, boss!"
>Pinkie trots in with a package.
>Quickly, you flip the television off.
>"Were you watchin' those romance flicks again, boss?"
>She oh so enjoyed calling you that.
"Nah, I dunno what you're talkin' about."
>She rolls her eyes and drops the package in front of you.
>"I always knew you were the lovey-dovey type!"
"Can it, Pinks. What's in the box?"
>Pinkie smiles.
>"You know I always bring the goods!"
>Flipping it open, she reveals perfectly powdered jelly donuts.
"Payed another visit to Joe, did ya?"
>"You know him, boss. Can't resist a bit of sugar."
>The smirk on her face reveals the intent of her smooth talk.
>But you already knew that.
>It's why you knew Pinks was a good partner, not afraid to use her 'cupcakes'.

>You swipe a donut and take a bite.
>Strawberry jelly, the good stuff.
>Pinks takes her seat behind her desk, throwing her hooves up on the oak table.
>"So, anything tonight?"
>You point a donut at her, a small drop of jelly hitting your desk.
"You think if we did, we wouldn't already be out the door?"
>Pinks sighs, eating a donut in one go.
>"We ain't gonna be able to keep afloat like this, boss."
>She's right.
>You groan as you flip the television back on, resuming your program.
"It's a dirty business, Pinks. We keep the streets clean to keep bits in our pocket. But when the garbage is all swept up? We're left to sink."
>You take a drag from your cigarette.
>It's not a cigarette...entirely.
>It's one of those sugar sticks.
>You glare at Pinks.
>"You know those things'll kill ya, boss."
>She tosses the lit stick in the trash.
>Which sets the trash on fire.
"Not any faster than you will!"

>Time passes, and your show ends.
>You'd have a tear in your eye if it weren't for Pinks in the corner.
>"Don't be such a sap, boss!"
>She can read you like a book.
>You turn off the tube and stand up.
"We should call it for the night, no one's showin'."
>"Alrighty, boss. Night!"
>You grab your fedora and grey coat, and swing it over your suspender-clad shoulders.
>As you head to the door, you wave back at Pinks.
>She'll be here for a good couple of hours.
>Making absolutely sure that no one is coming in.
>Since that attack on her home, we wants to make sure nothing like it happens again.
>Admirable.
>As you turn to leave, the door opens for you.
>In the doorway, a white p0ny, with gorgeous purple mane.
>The red dress she wears pops out in the low light of your office.
>Looks like it won't be a quiet night after all.

"Evening, Miss Rarity."
>She chuckles lightly at your polite stature.
>"Oh come now, Anon. No need to be so formal."
>She steps inside and walks over to your desk.
>"Heya, Rarity!"
>Pinks waves at her frantically.
>There goes the air of professionalism.
>You toss your coat back on the rack.
>But the hat stays.
"Whatcha got for me, dollface?"
>She giggles once again, loving the compliment.
>"Do we have to move so quickly? I just got here~"
>She's in the mood for a bit of playing around.
>Unfortunately, if she's here, she must have a case.
>And that can't wait.
"Look toots, now ain't the time or the place."
>She sighs, batting her eyes at you.
>"I supposed if I caught you in the middle of Casa-blank-a instead of after it..."
>Clever dame.
>"See, I knew you were a sap, boss!"
"Shaddap, ya ankle-biter!"

"So, Rarity, why ya here anyways?"
>"Aside from spending time in your company? I got something you wanna see..."
>You press your hand against your temples.
"I told ya before, toots, not the time or the place."
>She sighs.
>"I meant a case file, ya big lummox."
>She drops a manila folder in front of you.
>Turning to leave, she stops for a brief moment.
>"Glad to know you're interested though."
>With a wink, she exits your office.
>"Ooooooooohhhh, she's trying to get at your candy cane, boss!"
>You roll your eyes.
"Quiet, Pinks. Let's see what we got here."
>You tear open the folder and flip through the papers.
"Looks like another griffon gang beatdown on 34th."
>Pinks' candy cigarette crunches between her teeth.
>"Griffons groups gone gangster? On my streets?"
>Pinks gets up, adjusting her trilby cap.
>"Let's bounce, Anon."
>She then literally bounces out the door.

>The city streets in the dim light of the streetlamps seems peaceful right now.
>The peace is welcomed, however.
>The corpse you and Pinks stand over deserves that much.
>Among the beaten and bruised body, you can easily tell who it is through the blue feathers.
>"Dash..."
>A small sniffle is heard, as Pinks raises a hoof to her face.
>You bend down and place a hand on her shoulder.
"We'll catch 'em Pinks."
>The tears begin to flow, dripping off her hooves, matching the falling rain.
>Rainbow was never close to you, but she was one of Pinks' best friends.
>After a silent cry, the hoof comes down.
>On a face where there used to be anguish, only resolve and determination remain.
>"Anon..."
>She reaches into her jacket, grabbing a candy cigarette, lighting the tip.
>Caramel drips to the ground as powdered sugar escapes her lips.
>You don't question it.
>"Let's go."
>With that, the roar of ambulances arrives behind you.
>You and Pinks leave the scene as they carry away her body.
"Shoulda brought a Hearst...she don't deserve to be pecked apart at the hospital."

>Speaking of pecked apart, you know just where to start.
>You have a feeling Pinks does too.
"Dash had a past with the griffons..."
>You pull out a photo.
>Pinks looks at it, then grimaces.
>"Gilda."
>The stern looking griffon is your first suspect.
>Putting the photo away, you swipe a candy cig from your partner.
>You pop it in your mouth and look up to the overcast sky.
>The rain slowly trickles down on your face.
>Pinks is silent, joining you in looking skyward.
>Dash is flyin' around up there, right now.
>You just know it.

>With that, you and Pinks walk down the sidewalk.
>It's a cold, rainy night in the streets of Ponyville.
>The gutters are stained red with the blood of an innocent.
>These streets aren't kind, that's for certain.
>But it's down to you to clean 'em up.
>The dim glow of the lamplights shade your face from view under your fedora.
>It helps to hide the single tear.
>"Come on boss, now's not the time to be a sap."
>Pinks looks up at ya with a smile.
>Of all the times to stay positive...
>It's why she's your partner.
>You walk alongside her as you make your way to Gilda.
>It's gonna be a long night.