Cucaloma songfic (Let Me In)

Just to want it,
And not to need it,
Makes me let it go.

Cucali slammed her door shut. "I'm not openin' this again, so just fuck off!"

"I, I won't," Paloma's voice shook a little. "I won't. I'm not going to leave until you accept it!"

"There's nothing to accept, you goddamn moron!"

"There is!"

"Fine! Stay out there! Burn in the sun for all I care!"

But then you let me in,
And I don't want it.

Paloma was singing to herself out there. Cucali could hear it from behind her door, an old Alternian war hymn. Privately, she had to admit that her voice wasn't bad -- but she wished it would get the fuck off her doorstep!

Morning would come soon, Cucali told herself, and surely she'd be gone by then. If not... well... fuck her.

Fuck her. She had no right. No fucking right to do all this.

But you made me believe it.
So do I really? Do I really?

As the grey dawn began to peek over the horizon, Cucali threw her door open.

"You idiot! Why the fuck are you still out here?!"

"Because," Paloma said, "I knew you'd open your door."

"Fuck you!" Cucali slammed her door shut. A moment later, she opened it again.

"... and get the fuck inside before you get burnt, you stubborn asshole."

If you could you keep it together
For a moment in time?

Paloma sat in Cucali's hive, patiently listening to the bombster's diatribe.

"... and on top of that, you're an A-grade moron! What sort of idiot just sits around for the sun?! You're no fuckin' jadeblood, that's for sure! How have you even survived for so long?!"

Paloma smiled. "Because I have friends."

"Fuck you and your little lowblood friends! Don't push that shit on me!"

"But you care, you've shown it time and time again."

"I don't care! I'm only doin' this stuff for me, you got it? How can you be so stupid?!"

Then you'd see that I can't be,
Your excuse for a lover.

"I still think you'd be a good friend, Cucali."

Cucali turned away. "You don't know shit about me. I've already told you what I do to my friends."

"You haven't done it to me."

"Yet."

A steep mountain to climb.
You would see.

"I keep beatin' your dumb ass and you keep comin' back! What the fuck do I have to do to make you realise I ain't your friend?!"

"You'd have to stop showing you actually care." Paloma looked up at Cucali, meeting her eyes. "And I don't think you can."

"You wanna die, you stupid bitch?!"

"No. I trust you."

"You fuckin' shouldn't!"

I left my shoes under your bed
But I left my body outside.

Paloma slept in the corner of the hive, slime on her face and arms, and Cucali watched her.

She was kind of cute when she wasn't spouting all that friendship bullshit...

Wait, no she fucking well wasn't!

How could I get back into this mess?
I kept telling myself the temptations would do me in.
(And they did...)

Paloma woke early, the nightmares still tugging at her skirt like insistent wrigglers. She sighed, leaning back against the wall.

Maybe she was stupid. Maybe this would get herself killed.

But she just couldn't leave Cucali alone.

If you could you keep it together
For a moment in time?

"Look," Cucali said the next evening, folding her arms. "I don't know what I have to do to convince you to leave me the fuck alone, but I've got absolutely no interest in associating with some peasant, got it?!"

"Cucali..." Paloma trailed off, looking up at her, hurt.

"Don't you 'Cucali' me! And don't give me that fuckin' look!"

Then you'd see that I can't be,
Your excuse for a lover,

"I can't be your friend, and that's final!"

"I... I don't believe you."

"I don't want anything to do with you!"

"You, you're wrong."

"I'm wrong about my own fuckin' decisions?!"

"You care about me, Cucali... don't you?"

"No I don't!"

A steep mountain to climb.
You would see.

Paloma stood, stepping up to Cucali. "You're stubborn. I understand, it's because you're a highblood and you can't just associate with me like that. But get this through your thick thinkpan, please: I'm not. Giving. Up."

Cucali grabbed Paloma, and there was a split-second pause before she shoved her away.

"You're gonna die, you idiot."

"I don't believe I will."

"Are you fuckin' blind?!"

And I think I see this happening again
From my lonely point of view

"I see more clearly than you think." Paloma stepped forward again, reaching out to touch Cucali's arm. She swatted it away.

"What do you think you're gonna achieve by bein' friends with me?"

"Well, we had fun flying together... didn't we?"

"I was only doin' it because it was useful!"

"Then, then why were you always laughing and smiling?"

See every time that I'm with you
I think this will happen again.

"Ugh. If I agree to fly with you again, will you leave me the fuck alone about this friendship shit?!"

"Sure," Paloma smiled, "I can live with that."

"You're gonna get yourself killed. One day I'm not gonna take mercy on you, mark my words."

"I promise I'll be surprised if it happens."

If you could you keep it together
For a moment in time?
Then you'd see, that I can't be...

Cucali slammed the door behind Paloma as she left, and leant heavily against it, closing her eyes.

"What an idiot," she mumbled to herself.