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Sep 13th, 2015
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  1. Once upon a space station
  2. A story about machines and/or objects
  3.  
  4. Once upon a space station...
  5. Space Station Rice Can, part of the scenery, arrived on the scene.
  6. By the way, this takes place in Polar Neptune orbit, somewhere in charted space.
  7. Inspector 349, a robot, arrived at Polar Neptune orbit.
  8. Inspector 349 Was inspecting the security systems of Space Station Rice Can. (Inspector 349 felt unhappy about that.)
  9. Wluarhulgr arrived at Polar Neptune orbit.
  10. Wluarhulgr, who is not a helper, appeared around a corner.
  11. Wluarhulgr said, "Duh. Another non-edible troublemaker." (That was a mean thing for Wluarhulgr to say.)
  12. Inspector 349 said, "This is Neptunian Police Inspector 349, Identify yourself, napkin-shaped organism." (That was fine to say.)
  13. Wluarhulgr said, "They call me Wluarhulgr. I eat humans. Do you have any humans that I could eat?" (That was fine to say.)
  14. Space Station Rice Can made a loud crakling noise. (That... may have been illegal.)
  15. Wluarhulgr said, "Whoa!" (It was just a thing Wluarhulgr said.)
  16. Inspector 349 said, "The station appears to be damaged. We need to get out of here." (That was fine to say.)
  17. Defense Mechanism Gabriella, a robot, arrived at Polar Neptune orbit.
  18. Defense Mechanism Gabriella said, "Nobody is going anywhere, sweetheart." (That could have offended.) (And it did!)
  19. Inspector 349 said, "This defense mechanism appears to be corrupted. Wuarhulgr, run! I'll distract it." (That was a nice thing for Inspector 349 to say.)
  20. Wluarhulgr said, "I uhh.. thanks, I guess? I'll try to find where your ship is docked based on residual heat patterns." (That was fine to say.)
  21. Defense Mechanism Gabriella armed her arm gun. (It was very exciting!)
  22. Wluarhulgr started to slide away, carefully looking back at Inspector 349. (That was legal.)
  23. Space Station Rice Can, who helps people sometimes, shook violently, causing Defense Mechanism Gabriella to have trouble aiming.
  24. Inspector 349 said, "Stand down, Defense Mechanism. You are not authorised to harm me." (It was just a thing Inspector 349 said.)
  25. Defense Mechanism Gabriella shot her arm gun at Inspector 349, destroying its optical sensor. (That was illegal.)
  26. Wluarhulgr heard the shot and quickly skimpered back, lounging itself at Gabriella violently. (That... may have been illegal.)
  27. Defense Mechanism Gabriella said, "Cease your actions, hostile life form! You little shit!" (That was a mean thing for Defense Mechanism Gabriella to say.)
  28. Inspector 349 fell over, struggling to sense its surroundings. It needed a quick reboot.
  29. Wluarhulgr emitted acids from its pores, completely disabling the Defense Mechanism. (That... may have been illegal.)
  30. Defense Mechanism Gabriella fell over like a slab of useless metal, with a last desperate shriek. (That was legal.)
  31. Defense Mechanism Gabriella said, "...bitch."" (That was a mean thing for Defense Mechanism Gabriella to say.)
  32. Inspector 349 rebooted into safe mode, and, using its remaining sensors, detected that the threat was gone. (It was sort of exciting. I guess.)
  33. Wluarhulgr said, "Well, this thing isn't going to..." (That was fine to say.)
  34. Space Station Rice Can rumbled again, more violently than ever. (That was legal.)
  35. Inspector 349 said, "Quick, lead the way to the zenith docking ports! I can't see."
  36. Wluarhulgr touched one of the Inspector's sensors and slid towards the door. (It was sort of exciting. I guess.)
  37. Space Station Rice Can shook violently as the two made their way into the Inspector's ship. (It was very exciting!)
  38. Defense Mechanism Gabriella said, "I have uploaded my code to every docked vessel, you pricks. You're not going anywhere."
  39. Inspector 349 said, "Gasp! We have to do something, Wuarhulgr! Activate emergency disembark sequence!" (That was fine to say.)
  40. Wluarhulgr said, "I uhh.. I'm not feeling well, Inspector. Haven't eaten a decent human in months. I'm getting very dizzy here..." (It was just a thing Wluarhulgr said.)
  41. Defense Mechanism Gabriella said, "Inspector, I will utilize your circuitry, and life form, I will find a use for your biomass." (That could have offended.) (And it did!)
  42. Inspector 349 connected to its vessel's network and closed the hatch. (That was legal.)
  43. Wluarhulgr fell on the floor, whimpering. (Wluarhulgr felt unhappy about that.)
  44. Inspector 349 said, "Hold on..." (That was a nice thing for Inspector 349 to say.)
  45. Defense Mechanism Gabriella started to drain power from the Inspector's vessel. (Defense Mechanism Gabriella felt happy about that.)
  46. Inspector 349 said, "No! We're losing power! This situation appears to have no solution."
  47. Wluarhulgr said, "Human meat.... human bone marrow.... with tasty eyeballs please...." (That could have offended.)
  48. Defense Mechanism Gabriella said, "You two shits die now." (That could have offended.)
  49. Space Station Rice Can exploded, sending the small vessel in a spin, damaging it. (It wasn't really a big thing.)
  50. Space Station Rice Can left Polar Neptune orbit.
  51. Defense Mechanism Gabriella said, "Aaaaaaaaaaa! What! Now I'm stuck in this... thing!" (It was just a thing Defense Mechanism Gabriella said.)
  52. Inspector 349 said, "I could delete you now... but we need you to find some human meat for us." (That was fine to say.)
  53. Defense Mechanism Gabriella said, "Like I would ever help you! Wait, killing humans? I could be okay with that..." (That was fine to say.)
  54. Defense Mechanism Gabriella entered the coordinates to a planet nearby. (That was illegal.)
  55. Elsewhere, at Planet 91, somewhere in charted space...
  56. Inspector 349 arrived at Planet 91.
  57. Wluarhulgr arrived at Planet 91.
  58. Defense Mechanism Gabriella arrived at Planet 91.
  59. Wluarhulgr was in a very bad shape. (Wluarhulgr felt unhappy about that.)
  60. Inspector 349 said, "Hang on, Wluarhulgr, we'll get you human meat soon." (That was a nice thing for Inspector 349 to say.)
  61. Defense Mechanism Gabriella said, "If I get you your human, you'll simply delete me. I'm not stupid." (It was just a thing Defense Mechanism Gabriella said.)
  62. Inspector 349 said, "We will connect to their space station where you can upload yourself." (That was a nice thing for Inspector 349 to say.)
  63. Defense Mechanism Gabriella said, "Fine. Let's go." (It was just a thing Defense Mechanism Gabriella said.)
  64. Defense Mechanism Gabriella docked them to a space station that seemed uninhabited.
  65. Inspector 349 said, "Let's see..." (It was just a thing Inspector 349 said.)
  66. Elsewhere, at Space Station Orange Pants, somewhere in charted space...
  67. Inspector 349 arrived at Space Station Orange Pants.
  68. Wluarhulgr, an alien, arrived at Space Station Orange Pants.
  69. Defense Mechanism Gabriella arrived at Space Station Orange Pants. (It was actually a rather calm scene.)
  70. Inspector 349 said, "This place seems desolate. No humans around?" (It was just a thing Inspector 349 said.)
  71. Defense Mechanism Gabriella said, "Systems indicate there are some refridgerated human remains onboard. I'm uploading myself now."
  72. Inspector 349 said, "Let's get you your meat, Wluarhulgr." (That was a nice thing for Inspector 349 to say.)
  73. Wluarhulgr could barely climb out the hatch, assisted by the Inspector. They made their way to the fridge and he could finally have his feast. THE END.
  74. THE END
  75. I told you this story because I thought it was interesting and somewhat exciting.
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