Advertisement
Not a member of Pastebin yet?
Sign Up,
it unlocks many cool features!
- >Another day in Equestria
- >Be the filly with a question that needs to be answered
- >Which you can ask if this lecture ever ends
- >"So is it getting through to you now how dangerous that was? Or if I thought Discord gave you as a gift and you were left as a life-sized filly lawn gnome?"
- >This speech would probably be more effective if it were coming from someone other than yourself
- >The you that's the original, purple found out cloning was hard
- >Apparently the other you was worried at some point
- >Though some ponies were talking about him yelling at the sun again before actually helping you
- "A pony would've reported me to someone, they don't take lewd statues lightly here."
- >"And whose fault is that? Especially after the quesadillas?"
- >You still hate when not-you is right
- >Especially because he thinks exactly like you do
- "Point is that you should've let me have the trout, faggot."
- >"Not when you act like that, and you know that's not the point. Just- fine, go fuck off until I think of a way to actually get through to you."
- >Hah, you won the stall-out of stubbornness
- >That means freedom to go bother purple about your forehead protrusion
- >Bookhoers knows about being a pony and should have a surface level knowledge on what exactly a horn is made of
- >You arrive at the castle after a long run-turned-walk
- >Running still sucks, no matter the number of legs
- >You knock on the large crystalline door
- >It takes a moment before the biggest beta you know opens it
- "Ey, Spike! What's up? I'm here to talk to-"
- >"Sorry 'Non, Twilight said to tell you that she's not helping you find more poison joke."
- >Damn, there goes those future plans
- >But that's not what you're here for this time
- >You're here to learn something important, something vital
- "It's not that, but I do have a question for her. Fate of Equestria may depend on the answer."
- >Spike gives you a flat look, like the one you'd give to a child who's obviously lying but it's more effort than it's worth to confront them about it
- >"She's in the library. Seriously, don't ask about the poison joke."
- "Yeah, yeah, whatever you gem-munching fag."
- >He opens the door more so that you can squeeze in
- >You immediately start for the library
- >This place seems almost nostalgic, back from your first few days here
- >Back when the current pony-you wasn't made yet and had just gotten here, Twi wanted to study you
- >And again when Twilight gave you pony-lessons and magic lessons after her cloning failure
- >You reach her personal library door, and find it closed shut
- >Usually a sign that whatever she's trying to research, she's deep into it
- >A perfect time to yell for her loudly while walking in
- "OH TWILIGHT! I NEED SOME HELP FROM THE PRINCESS OF FRIENDSHIP!"
- >You walk in to see the mare stumble off a stepping stool while letting out a pained cry
- >She quickly gets up, and shoots you a glare
- >"Spike should've told you that I'm-"
- "Not helping me find poison joke. Yeah, I've heard. I just have a question, a very important question that I need you to answer. Purely academic."
- >Twilight gives you a shocked look
- >"You... have an academic question? For me? You're the same Anon that slept through all of my lectures on how to be a pony, and you have a question?"
- "Yeah, don't get your tail in a twist. It's been bothering me, what exactly is a unicorn horn made of?"
- >Her face lights up in a way you've only seen just before your lessons
- >"I thought you'd never ask such an important and scholarly question! It's quite simple, I just need to get a couple of my bio-sorcery books from the other shelf and we can get started!"
- >This might have been a mistake
- >"To start you off, what do you know about our horns?"
- "That I traded my lower horn for this one, and that it makes magic."
- >She completely ignores your joke while levitating a few books from the shelves
- >"They don't make magic, they harness it from a nearby gland. Now, do you have any theories on what they're made of?"
- "Bone, maybe? Or a solid chunk of hair like a buffalo?"
- >"Neither, it's a completely different structure completely!"
- >Her voice pitches up in enthusiasm as she finds the book she was looking for. "Basic Pony Physiology - Second Edition"
- >Opening it up, she points at a diagram of a unicorn head with a label on the horn
- "...Alicorn? Isn't that what you and Lulu are?"
- >"Well, yes, but it was discovered by Starswirl the Bearded that horns were in fact not bone but a highly conductive bonelike material that had a plethora of nerve-endings that could not sense pain. He named the material after the princesses to honor their strength and sensitivity. Also, that's Princess Luna to you, not Lulu."
- "Huh. The more you know. Now, second question."
- >Twilight stamps her hooves in a sort of clapping of excitement
- >"Yes, Nonny?"
- "Where's Discord, I have an idea-"
- >Her smile immediately drops, and her horn lights up
- >"No."
- >You hear a pop, and you blink to find yourself right outside your house
- "C'mon! That whole thing was weeks ago!"
- >It was worth a shot anyway
- >You hear the human Anon inside
- >"Oh, sounds like she's back. Wait here, I'll get her for you."
- >He opens the door and looks at you with a smile
- >Oh fuck you know that smile, that's your I've-Already-Won shit-eating grin special
- "What did you do?"
- >"I found a way to get through to you."
- >Damn, forgot about that
- >It's getting late, so maybe it's something quick
- >Neither of you like to miss bedtime
- >You walk in the door only to have that hope crushed
- >Three fillies, three sleeping bags, and your own markless ass
- "Oh, hey girls, what's up?"
- >Your attempt at a calm, collected voice comes out as a shaky, nervous one
- >You really hope they don't say what you think they're going to say
- >Sweetie Belle confirms your worst thoughts
- >"Mr. Anon said we could have a sleepover! Isn't that great, Nonny?"
- >You quietly swear an even deeper oath of vengeance upon Anon for this
Advertisement
Add Comment
Please, Sign In to add comment
Advertisement