Advertisement
TexAnon

Tsun Dere's Art of Love

Jun 3rd, 2014
1,410
0
Never
Not a member of Pastebin yet? Sign Up, it unlocks many cool features!
text 10.18 KB | None | 0 0
  1. >Day where the red apples grow in Equestria
  2. >You are Applejack, and you always figured work would be your life, while silently hoping some handsome hired hoof would decide to settle down with you.
  3. >But as he likes to say, "It's happening!"
  4. >Technically speaking though, Anonymous is more of a hired HAND, and in there lies the problem.
  5. >You have no idea how to put the moves on him.
  6. >Not that you had much experience with ponies, but still!
  7. >It's always an awkward affair trying to speak with him, and you're afraid that if you don't get your feelings across to him soon, then you may lose him to some other mare.
  8. >At least for now you can focus on bucking trees and getting the last of the days work-
  9. >"Done!"
  10. >Anonymous comes around the tree with his fists in the air, sweating like he won a boxing match against Iron Will in the last round.
  11. "The heck y'all mean 'done'? The sun ain't gonna set fer at least another couple hours."
  12. >"Not our problem boss, I just finished last few trees in this field and we're not scheduled to gather from the next one until at least a couple days from now."
  13. >Turning tail to validate his statement, you see that he has indeed cleared the remainder of the field and put up almost all of the equipment except for what you were using.
  14. "B-but how?"
  15. >He takes off his shirt to wipe the sweat from his head.
  16. >"Squats and oats!"
  17. >As he demonstrates his technique, you watch the faded blue fabric that used to be loose fitting jeans stretch to remain in one piece around his bulging muscles, and hug that well toned man butt of his.
  18. >Does he smell like oatmeal, or is it just you?
  19. "W-well we pay by the hour 'round here, so if'n y'all wanna take a hit to yer bit sack then by all means!" Why can't you just thank him for his help like a normal pony?
  20. >"I'm practically getting paid to work out, so it's no biggie. Plus now it's freed up more of my night. So how about it boss? Care to have a few drinks on me?"
  21. >Oh how you would just love to lap up some cider off those chiseled abs, then keep licking lower, and lower until-
  22. >"Uh boss?" He snaps his fingers in front of your face to get your attention.
  23. >Oh Celestia no, he caught you staring.
  24. >A granola cluster rolls out of your mane.
  25. >"You look kinda flushed, this summer heat is killer, so don't push yourself too hard. I've heard about what happened last time."
  26. >You pull your hat down to cover your face to hide your blush and try to thank him for his concern.
  27. >Instead what comes out is, "Ah'm a big mare and don't need nopony nagging me about mah work ethic. Since y'all are so insistent on paying for it, Ah might as well keep ya company. But it takes more then a few drinks to warm me up so don't go thinkin' this is gonna be an easy date or anythang!"
  28. >Your nose scrunches up, but he shouldn't see it from this angle.
  29. "N-not that Ah think this is a date or somethin'. Anyways, Ah'll meet ya at the bar at sunset, so don't be late!"
  30. >With that you gallop back to the farm as fast as your legs can take you, leaving a shirtless Anonymous scratching his head.
  31.  
  32. "Uh, see you then?"
  33. >Applejack is well out of earshot by now, but you were too confused by the way she mumbled part of the last thing she said, and how quickly she took off.
  34. >Slinging your sweaty shirt over your shoulders, you turn and head back towards town
  35. "It's like she hates me or something."
  36. >Doesn't explain why she agreed to go though.
  37. >Besides, she's the element of honesty and you've heard her straight up tell a motherfucker that she didn't give a shit what they think before turning back to listen to whatever lame story you were telling.
  38. >Pushing those bothersome thoughts aside, you hurry home to shower off a days hard work and admire the work you've put into getting as you flex in front of the mirror.
  39. "Hey Applejack, I got us a pair of tickets. TO THE GUN SHOW!" You pump your biceps in a display of raw power.
  40. "Oops, I think dropped something." You bend over while flexing your glutes. "Your jaw."
  41. "Wanna see a cool trick?" You begin to alternate popping your pecs until they cramp up after the seventh or eighth pop.
  42. >Okay, still need to work on that one.
  43. "Ow..."
  44. >Getting on your cleanest jeans and a fresh white T, you mess with your hair a bit before settling on your usual style.
  45. >Even as the sun sets over the horizon, the summer heat radiates off the cobble stone streets, making you glad you left your suit and tie at home.
  46. >Besides, as you come up to the bar and admire it's cracked and chipped saloon doors, as well as it's cardboard taped over the holes glass windows, you know in your heart that this not a suit and tie affair.
  47. >The fading rays of sunlight that would've shown through the open double doors are eclipsed by your visage.
  48. >You spot the always familiar tan hat of your employer seated at one of the booths, facing away from the door, but you head straight for the counter to place an order.
  49. "Six of your coldest ciders bub, for me and that pretty little thing over there."
  50. >You slide the appropriate amount of bits across the polished wood counter and the barkeep nods in understanding.
  51. >Clicking your tongue at, and fist bumping the hooves of some of the other regulars, you mosey on down to where Applejack sits and take the padded seat across from her.
  52. "Hey boss, been waiting long?"
  53. >The last ray of light shoots through the window and casts a soft glow around her as she turns to face you.
  54. >"Well, ya got here right on time, but JUST barely. So Ah won't hold it against you. Unless ya want me to."
  55. >You missed the last part of what she said as the bartender sets down the tray with your drink in between you.
  56. >"Why in the hay did ya order six?"
  57. "It'll mean less trips for our good friend here." You tuck a bit into his vest pocket with one hand while grabbing your first drink with the other."
  58. >"Hmph. Yer a little loose with yer money if ya ask me."
  59. "As long as I have more than I need, then why not use the rest to spread the joy? Besides I know how crazy your tips get once you start drinking that 'Pelo de los Perros' ale from the badlands."
  60. >She turns her head to the side, "Tch, everypony has a drink they're weak against."
  61. >You slam an empty mug on the table to get her attention and are already halfway through your second before she can ask why you did that.
  62. >Turning the empty mug over your head, you catch the last drops on your tongue before slamming this one as well.
  63. >Applejack looks shocked at first but sees your challenge as you give the bartender the signal for more.
  64. "I'll let you have those as a handicap, now let's see if old Applejack Daniels can defend her crown against VodkAnonymous."
  65. >The fire in hers and your eyes would only be matched that night by the ones in your bellies as mug after mug and shot after shot are slurped, slammed and occasionally snorted as a crowd pleaser.
  66. >By the end of the second hour, pyramids of used glassware stand erected on your table, and the two tables to either side.
  67. >It's dead even, but while you're seeing three Applejacks and staring at the nine apples on their asses, you can tell she's having trouble just staying in her seat.
  68. >You raise your final shot between you both and she shakily takes hers between her hooves as she raises it to meet yours.
  69. "To a night we'll never remember."
  70. >Her face pales for a moment before she taps her glass to yours and you throw back your shot, savoring the burn once again and watching as Applejack stares at hers before setting it down and falling over onto the padded cushioning of her booth seat.
  71. >You reach over and grab her glass before standing before the crowd.
  72. "And so begins the reign of The King of Drink, Anonymous!"
  73. >"LONG LIVE THE KING!" The crowd shouts as you tip back the last of her whiskey before falling backwards onto the table and knocking it over.
  74.  
  75. >When you awake the next day, it's to unfamiliar surroundings and under the covers of an enormous bed.
  76. "Where the hay- OWWwww..." You clutch your head with your hooves in agony.
  77. >Looking over to your side, you see Anonymous also under the sheets and suddenly it all makes sense.
  78. "But Ah thought Ah stopped drinkin' before Ah'd get blackout!"
  79. >Oh who are you kidding? You could barely sit up straight by the end of the match, not like drunk you knew any better.
  80. >With a pitiful moan, you lay back down and hope his memory's as bad as yours after he won.
  81. >"Mornin' Applejack, sleep well?"
  82. >That might be the first time he's ever called you by name since he started working on the farm.
  83. >Your heart skips a beat, but this isn't how you wanted it to be.
  84. "Look pard, whatever happened last night, it's probably for the best if we just forget about it."
  85. >"No can do. I had way too much fun taking the top spot from you."
  86. >He rode you like a rodeo but you can't remember it. Great.
  87. >"So, you ready to bow before your King?"
  88. >And now he wants to go again.
  89. "Ah guess so."
  90. >"You guess so, what?"
  91. >Nopony has ever dominated you let alone try but he's got you all hot and bothered now.
  92. "Mah King."
  93. >"I just LOVE the way that sounds."
  94. >You take a deep breath and throw up the covers as you prepare to roll over for him until you notice he's still wearing his clothes from last night minus the shoes and shirt.
  95. "What happened to yer clothes?"
  96. >"Yeah, about that. I barely paid off our tab last night and since we couldn't sleep at the bar so I picked you up and bought you here. Trying to walk all the way back to the farm was too much for me to handle last night."
  97. "Still don't explain why ya ain't got a shirt on."
  98. >"I was gonna keep it to myself, but on the way here I guess I was stumbling too much and have you a bad shake because you puked all over my shirt. So I took it off and ditched it in a trash can before bring you here to sleep it off."
  99. "So then nothin' else happened after that?"
  100. >"Not really, no."
  101. "Then why were y'all makin' me call you mah king just now?"
  102. >"Because I am the DrinKing now and will be addressed as such! So kneel before me my subject." He gets up and stands in front of the bed.
  103. >You get up on all fours and turn around.
  104. >Bending over and biting the pillow, you flick it up, over your head and buck it straight at his face where it collides against him with and audible 'pomf'.
  105. "Anonymous you idjit!" And with that you run out of his house and all the way back home while screaming in frustration.
  106. >Today was a bad day for love.
Advertisement
Add Comment
Please, Sign In to add comment
Advertisement