If you're reading this, you probably consider yourself loyal enough to the Foundation. They've taken care of you.

It might not bother you to know SCP-3000 is a recruiting tool.

We've never been in short supply of ethically compromised scientists, but how do you think we get our clerks? Administrators and organizers, who keep the day to day mechanism of the Foundation going? Hundreds like them might pass you in the halls every day. They've always been here. They always will be.

Of course, it's not supposed to be in the wild. We used to have real people calling, a phone bank with anomalous handsets. It's an empty room now, somewhere in the bowels of a site. The calls don't seem to care, they keep rolling in and bringing us more people than ever. Dedicated, loyal employees.

I don't know why it's helping us.