(AiE) Dash Tries to Win Your Heart - Part 07

>"Alright. Last call you two. We're closing up in an hour," the bartender calls, already putting chairs upside down on their tables.
"I'll call you... something!" you slur aggressively at him.
>"Nice one," Rainbow giggles.
>You raise your hand up high in the air for a high five. Rainbow looks up at your hand and reaches up with all of her might to respond, but her hooves are just too short.
>"Stop being taaalll!" Rainbow whines.
"Oooh shit. Hold on, hold on," you say, bringing your arm down to a more respectable chest height.
>Rainbow bumps her hoof against your hand to complete the high-five.
>"Yeeaahh! We did it," she says happily.
"We da bess."
>"No, you da bess," she says, pointing a hoof at you and then spinning in her barstool.
>You turn back to your now empty glass and look over to Rainbow's empty glass.
"Shit. Rainbow?"
>"Yeh," she says, still spinning happily.
"I think... I think we had too much."
>"Psh. Probably. But whooo carees?"
>You stare at your glass sadly then turn to her with a scared look.
"Rainbow, this is bad," you reiterate.
>She stops and places a hoof on the bar to steady herself. She clears her throat and blinks a few times.
>"Why? Is everything okay?" she says, her voice serious.
"I don't think I'm safe to drive."
>A silence hangs in the air as you stare at her intently. However, the alcohol betrays you. A smile creeps at the edges of your lips. Then, you snicker. Then you break into a full-fledged laugh. Rainbow shakes her head and snickers along with you.
>"You really had me going, Anon."
"You should have seen the looook on your faaace," you try to say through bouts of laughter.
>The bartender comes over to the two of you and glances around to the empty bar.
>"Listen guys. Y'all were a joy to have tonight. Plus, you tipped great. But, you guys are waaayyy too far gone, and I have a wife at home. So, mind callin’ it a night?" he asks.
"Suuuuuurree!" you slur, swaying towards him. "I'll let you get the freak on with your gurl."
>"Anoon. That's groooss," Rainbow says. "But true."
>Stepping out of your seat, you manage to pull yourself together enough to get your balance. Which is more than you can say for your friend, who eases herself with a hoof then flops into a pile into the floor.
>"I'mmm a puddle," Rainbow announces to the room.
>"Is... she okay?" The bartender asks.
"She'll be finee," you assure the bartender. "I'll take her home. It's all good."
>You bend down and take the Rainbow puddle into your arms. It might be the alcohol speaking, but she's a lot less heavy than you expected. You pull her up into your arms, like a massive, yet lightweight dog.
>"Puuut me dowwnn. Puddles aren't for carrying..." Rainbow Dash protests, flailing against your grasp. However, her drunken pushes only amount to light bops against your chest.
"No. Rainbow. You are drunk. You cannot do the walking. Thanks again, barkeep. We'll get out of your hair."
>"Thanks guys. Get home safe."
>"But I am the best at walking," she mutters to herself.
>You make your way out of the bar and out into the cool night air. The moon sheds it's natural light over the town of Ponyville, illuminating the empty street. Most of the lights in the nearby houses have already turned out, ready for tomorrow's day of hard work.
"Alright Dash, I'mma get you home."
>"Nooo, I don't wannnaaa."
"No, Dash," you say, taking a fatherly tone. "You're drunk. I gotta get you home."
>Rainbow groans, but rests her head against your chest.
>"Fine. Wake me up when we get there."
>Without a further need for instruction, you set off towards Dash's home. Your motions are automatic and your feet set themselves on autopilot as you trek towards Rainbow's home. Your eyes glance around at the rare scene of Ponyville at night, and you can't help but smile. The town is tranquil and quiet. It's one of the nice things about living in a smaller town as opposed to a big city. Your gaze moves upward and you're able to feast your eyes on the multitude of stars in the night's sky.
"Hey Dash, look at the stars."
>She groans lightly, but doesn't move in your arms.
"Hey, butthead. I said-" but as you look down at your friend, you notice her eyes are closed, and her breathing is quiet and measured. Her right ear twitches, and she rests quietly in your arms. "Heh. I'll tell you about it tomorrow."
>Her ear wiggles and you can't help but notice how peaceful and tranquil she looks. Her hooves grip tightly around your arm. For stability, of course. In addition, she keeps herself close to your chest in the night air, to sap your body of its precious warmth. Silly pony. Get your own warmth.
>Clearly it can't be helped. You look up to the meadow in front of you where Dash usually takes off to her home.
>Wait. Takes off. Like flying.
>You look up to the sky, where Rainbow Dash's house is.
"Fuck, she lives in a goddamn cloud."
>Looking back down to the pony in your arms, you wonder how in the world you're going to get her home.
"Hey. Heeey. Dash. Dashie. Dursh. Wake up."
>You gently bob her up and down in your arms to try to shake her.
"Sleepyhead. Wake up."
>She groans, but turns her head and nuzzles back into your arm.
"No. Don't go to sleep! That's the opposite of waking up."
>Looking around at the world around you, you look for anyone who could be looking on at the awkward display. Lucky for you, it's 12:30 at night and everyone's asleep.
"Dash. I can't fly. Go home," you say to the sleeping pony in your arms, but she doesn't budge. "What am I going to do? Take you to my place? Do you know how weird that would look?"
>Dash still remains quiet. You take one more glance around, hoping nopony has suddenly appeared and is going to laugh at your ineptitude.
"Fine. You know what? I'm too tired for this. I'm taking you home, and you'll never live this down."
>Your feet set off once again. Now, your eyelids feel heavy under the pressure of a long day and a little too much alcohol for your liking. Dash gently snores in your arms as you struggle to get your keys out of your pocket and enter your home.
>Once you get inside, you close the door behind you and lock it.
"Alright, Dash. I'm gonna give you the couch. Gimme a sec."
>You head to the couch and ease her down onto the sofa. She sprawls out on the couch and rests her head against one of the arms of the couch. It'll probably be cold out here on the couch. You probably should get a blanket or something. You move upstairs to the closet in your bedroom and try to dig through the massive mess of clutter to find an extra blanket. You push away button down clothes, failed experiments of suits from Rarity, and various sports equipment, when you hear the squeak of your bed behind you. You turn around reflexively, and see Rainbow tucked under the covers of your bed.
"Hey! Hey. That's mine. No. That's where I sleep," you say to her.
>But, the snoring continues, as you run a hand over your face.
"Fine, you want me to make this weird? Because I'll make it weird. I'm the king of weird."
>You head over to the bed and pull away some of the covers.
"I'm getting in. Scoot over."
>To your surprise, she does. You pause, realizing you had lost this game of chicken before you even began to play. Rainbow is drunk. Her faculties aren't right. She'd probably do whatever someone told her to do. You sigh to yourself and pull the covers back.
"Fine, alright. Whatever. But I'm not sleeping on the couch."
>You lay on the bed over the covers allowing her to lie underneath. You roll yourself onto your side, facing the wall and away from her.
"Night, Dash," you say to her.
>She mutters something in her sleep. You pause, but she remains silent.
"What was that?" you ask her.
>"Movie... I'll wait,” she mutters.
>You shake your head, looking back to the wall. The poor thing's so out of it she's thinking of the movie tomorrow already. Oh well. You might as well let her sleep. Tomorrow should be fun day, barring whatever sort of hangover you'll get. Closing your eyes, sleep takes you almost instantly.