In My Own Words (Full)

>Day Stranger in a Strange Land in Equestria
>Be Noteworthy the Columnist
>Today's the day!
>You are finally going to meet your pen-pal
>You've been writing to them for six months now, give or a take a day, and have been waiting for this moment since the lottery began last week
>The silver ticket looks perfect on your desk as you mull over a few pieces of identification
>Some of these pictures kind of make you look fat, but a passport is a passport
>You really hate how your mane came out in this one and your horn looks crooked
>Regardless, you know how good you really look in pony
>You gather up your ID and grab your favorite quill
>It sits neatly behind your ear and you pose it a bit
>You want to look good, first impressions are everything!
>A written list lies casually on your desk and you check it over
"Quill? Check! Boarding pass? Check! Checklist for checking check-offs? Double check!"
>You smile at your neatly written scroll before wrapping it up and storing it in your saddlebag
>Everything you think you will need on Earth sits neatly at the bottom before you heft it onto you back with your magic
>The final item you snag is the picture of your human friend from your mirror
>You speak rapidly to the small portrait
"Today, Anonymous! We'll meet in the flesh and we'll have tons of stories to share! I know it!"
>You tuck the picture in your saddlebag and trot happily from your home
>The trip around town sees you off to a good start and you make it to the train station relatively quickly
>You see a good line of ponies ahead of you and let out a frustrated sigh
"Easy, Noteworthy... lines happen. Anon has waited this long..."
>The line moves forward slowly and you find yourself thinking aloud
"Jeez, you'd think -we- pay enough tax to hire another clerk, right?"
>The line shifts uncomfortably around you while you try to make somep0ny engage in conversation
>A small noise appears from behind you and you turn your head to see
>Another light pink mare with a blue mane chuckles lightly
>"It seems worse than it is."
>Happy to have somep0ny to talk to, you press on for more
"I suppose you're right... name's Noteworthy, by the way. Maybe you've seen my column in the press?"
>You smile a bit too wide and the mare before you backs up
>"Oh... um, I think so?"
"It's the column on the human world, Earth? I'm going there -today- to actually meet real live humans! What about you, Hun?"
>"I'm just heading out back to Mustangia. Been on vacation here in Ponyville."
>You've never met a true Mustangia native before
>Better write this down
"Wow, great to hear it! Tell me, in your own words, what did you enjoy most about Ponyville?!"
>"Uh, uhm... is this like an interview?"
>You brandish a roll of paper and your quill
"It is now! What's your name?"
>"M-my name's B-Bumble Bee..."
"Like the bug of the same name?"
>"Y-yes..."
>The mare ducks down a bit as if embarrassed, but you assure her it's fine to be named after weird things
>Unless you are also weird, of course, then it's just -plain- weird!
"So, tell me, BB, mind if I call you BB? What was your favorite thing around Ponyville?"
>You drill her for this story for a short while until you find yourself nearing the front desk
"What a scoop! Not going to be seeing my editor for a few days, but don't you worry! When I do run this story, Mustangians will be beating down our doors!"
>Bumble Bee looks to you and jitters a bit
>She seems a little nervous and makes this low humming sound to steady herself
>You'd bet that's why they called her, "Bumble Bee!"
>"T-thanks?"
>You wrap your hoof over her shoulder and use your other hoof to display the sheer grandness of the story
"No, no, thank you! I got to split now, you stay charming, alright?"
>You shoot her a wink and click your tongue against your teeth before stepping up to the counter
>A grey mane stallion looks down at you with mild enthusiasm and begins in a dull tone
>"ID and tickets, please..."
>You whip them out of your saddlebag with great flair and place them on her desk
"I'll be heading out to the -human- world. Yep, just casually going to explore uncharted waters, is all. I mean, it's not like the paper's going to write itself, right?"
>A laugh bursts from you at the absurdity of the last comment, but it seems the desk worker doesn't share in the amusement
>Her loss, you think, as she passes you back your tickets
>"Alright, Ms., you'll be taking the 71-A to loading ramp C. Thank you for choosing Ponyville Express, we're the trains always run on time™..."
>You snatch up your belongings and wave
>In the train's defense, it does arrive at exactly 8 AM and you smile again to yourself
"Here we go..."
>You board and deposit your belongs at your hooves
>It feels nice to just sit for a moment, but you find you are alone in your isle
>No matter, either somep0ny will sit nearby soon or you'll just get to take in the breath-taking view of the countryside
>No pony sits by you as the train begins to move
>You resign yourself to a boring train ride after all and stare longingly at the bench on the other side of your own
>A nice couple and their little filly are bunched up and you try to eavesdrop, just for curiosity's sake
>Turns out they are going to the human world as well to visit a relative
>You've had flimsier excuses to speak before!
>You get out of your seat and slowly stroll towards the group before stopping in front of the father
"Hmm, what?"
>Everyp0ny stops to look up at you
"Oh, excuse me! Sorry, I thought you asked me if I was going to the human world too."
>The mother takes the bait and you smirk easily
>"Oh, deary, sorry if we were too loud. Just going to visit family in the city and I guess we're a tad excited, don'cha know?"
>You chuckle with her
"Oh, I do know! First time going there myself. But, it is just what us reporters do."
>You pose valiantly as if your job took you to the edges of Equestria before this
>"Oh, look, John, a reporter. Isn't that interesting?"
>The stallion looks you over once and scoffs
>"Good for you..."
"Say, have you been to this city before?"
>"Oh my, yes! We go every holiday to visit the little dears living in the big, kooky human world."
>Jackpot...
>You take the open seat beside the filly and lean over towards the wife
"Mind cluing me into some of the more interesting places to go see? You are the -expert- after all!"
>She blushes and turns to her husband
>"Oh-ho-ho my goodness, expert? Oh, you're too kind. John, isn't she too kind?"
>"Too kind, dear..."
>The trip goes by much quicker now that you have somep0ny to talk with and you learn a great deal of things about humans
>Well, not too much more, but some interesting tidbits all the same!
>The train finally begins to slow and you look at the lovely family again
"By the by, the name's Noteworthy."
>"My name's Marsh Lilly, but everyp0ny just calls me Marsha. This here's Brickhouse, he's a carpenter, don'cha know? And this is our little angel, Abbey."
>You nod to each member of the quaint family and proudly hold your head up
"Great to meet you and I hope you have a lot of fun in your travels! When you get back to Ponyville, look for the papers for a special story by yours truly."
>The stallion speaks up with a sharply raised eyebrow
>"Thought you said your name was, 'Noteworthy?'"
>You want to indulge him, but there are places to be, ponies to see, humans to watch
>Instead, you turn and leave the train with a quick chuckle of goodwill
>You find the designated platform, letter C as you recall, and wait by it patiently
>There is a certain haste to this area, you can feel it
>Everyp0ny seems to be moving faster around here with a can-do attitude not normally seen in Ponyville
>A pegasi checking bags approaches you and speaks quickly
>"My name is Ms. Hatchet. ID, please."
>You flash your passport and smile to mimic the picture
>"Where are you going today, Ms. Noteworthy?"
"Human world, got a friend to visit."
>"Mhmm... OK, what are you taking there?"
"Some paper, ink, quills, myself. That kind of thing."
>"Place your bags on the conveyer belt and step over to the next checkpoint."
>The security is very tight in this area, something wholly new to you
>What could you possibly take to the human world that would cause trouble?
>A unicorn flashes his magic over your bag before nodding to move it back to you
>Another mare in a sharp looking uniform approaches you and hands you a letter
>"We had a report that you won the Equestria Transfer Lottery. We need you to sign this waiver."
"Sure, can you explain it to me?"
>"This waiver says that any harm you bring or harm brought upon you in the human world, henceforth know as EARTH, will have to be resolved under the jurisdiction of human law. In the event that you should be killed, eaten or otherwise disemboweled, we will pass our condolences to your next of kin."
>You grimace as the list seems to get more and more gruesome and a split-second of doubt crosses your mind
>You shake it off as the waiver continues
>"Now, your employer is informed that you are leaving and you will be back in time for work tomorrow..."
"Whoa, hey now! I already took a week off for this trip."
>"Yes, well, human time moves much faster than Equestrian time. Your week stay on Earth will be one day in Equestria. You should know this already..."
"That explains why he let me go so easily... I guess this is still fair."
>"We also will have you know that you are not allowed to report anything you see or hear on Earth."
"Now you're going too far! The ponies deserve to know!"
>"We never deserved to even enter their world... if you want to go, you need to follow the law nd accept the consequences as written herein. Do you accept?"
>Whoever this pony is, she is certainly not from Ponyville
>You don't think you've ever met such a rough pony in all your life!
>But, you already promised Anonymous and by Celestia, you keep a promise!
"I accept..."
>"Excellent... enjoy your stay and keep your head down..."
>She steps aside and you are lead through a weird showering room and some kind of steam bath
>The next moment is disorienting and you are not really sure what to think
>Before you is a massive, round metal gate with two uniformed unicorns standing at either side
>Ms. Hatchet appears at your side with unnatural grace and looks sternly at the other unicorns
>"Jetsam, Samson, look lively! We have another for transport."
>The two straighten up and their horns point at the portal
"So... There's like... another train, right?"
>A magic lifts through the air and suddenly, the guarding unicorns blast the metal ring
>It comes to life with a whirring sound that nearly deafens you
>Ms. Hatchet screams to you as the machine rotates faster
>"Make haste, Ms. Noteworthy! The Portal will only stay open for minute before needing a recharge!"
>You gulp down all the fear you've been driven into since entering platform C and slowly trot towards the magic gate
>Ms. hatchet yells to you once more
>"Step lively! We haven't got all day and neither do you!"
>You hold your breath and throw yourself into the green vortex
>Everything slows down suddenly
>You cannot hear anything now and the whole world outside the portal looks grey
"Um, excuse me, something went wrong?"
>The guard's are frozen in their stand and even Ms. Hatchet looks colder than you first seen
>A stretching sensation tugs at your skin and tail and your eardrums pop
>The world suddenly disappears around you and you get the feeling that you are not alone
>After what feels like hours, you see a light in the distance
>You watch the small ball sit on the horizon for another few moments
>It explodes into a line, forming a horizon and the world above and below takes on form
>You really hate magical travel for this very reason
>Sound returns, time resumes its normal pacing and you find yourself standing somewhere absolutely terrifying

>Day Easily Disoriented on Earth
>All around you is white tile
>The walls, floors and even ceiling are all stark white
>You look around the strange landscape and find a good mixture of pony and human faces making up the place
>As you step from the portal, you are approached by a pony and human duo who are dressed alike
>They both have black suits, black shoes, some odd coil in their ears, and dark sunglasses on
>It is kind of disturbing considering you are inside and the light is not particularly bright
>"Ah, ten seconds, my win, Mr. D."
>The human looks down at the pony and hands her a green sheet of paper
>"I'll get you next time, Ms. T."
>"You underestimate pony equilibrium. We are surprising quick on our feet."
>The two stop bickering long enough to call to you
>Mr. D. is the first one to speak with you
>"Welcome to Earth, Ms. Noteworthy. Good to see you made it in one piece. We want to welcome you on behalf of the United States of America."
"Is... is that the name of this town?"
>"Country, actually... this state is New York and the city is... New York City."
>Ms. T. smiles under her shades and looks to you
>"Welcome to Earth, kiddo. Who is your contact?"
>You stare vacantly for a moment
"Oh, um, Anonymous... his name is Anonymous."
>They look to each other before Mr. D. holds his ear with the coil in it
>"Alright, send in the loud one."
>You stand around in a stupor for a few moments until you see the face of your pen pal enter the room
>You get a little choked up that you finally get to meet him in real life
>It doesn't hurt that he is the only familiar thing in the room
"Anon! Hey! It's me!"
>"Note, good to see you! How was the trip?"
"Not half bad."
>Your friend is dressed in a suit not unlike Mr. D. and you wonder if this is just common in humans
>Hopefully, you won't end up in one of them for the rest of your vacation
>"Alright, well, it was an interesting shakedown everyone, but I think it's time I get going."
>Ms. T. speaks frankly to Anon as you two begin to leave
>"Take care of her or we'll be seeing you sooner than you'd appreciate."
>"Please, as if I were anything -but- hospitable!"
>Everyp0ny and person so far seems loud and in each other's face
>You kind of like it
>Walking beside Anonymous for the first time makes this whole trip more surreal
>He is quiet until you get out of the building
>You step out into the light and take in the Earth for the moment
>It looks... like Manehatten!
>That is sort of disheartening that it wasn't slightly more alien than is sounded
"So... um, Anon... it's nice to see you for the first time. You know, other than your picture."
>"Likewise. How's everything?"
"Oh, it's pretty intense! I can't wait to write-!"
>You cut yourself short when you realize you can't report anything
>"Write what?"
"Ah, it's nothing... I am not allowed to report news here."
>You sulk a bit before Anon begins
>"Hey, don't worry about working. This is your vacation, right? Lets go have some fun instead."
>You like fun, maybe you'd go so far as to say you -love- fun
>Anon begins to walk off to a nearby metallic chariot humans something use
>It looks really nice
>"Alright, want to sit shotgun?"
"Sit where now?"
>He chuckles a bit and opens a door
>"Get it, you nut."
>You hop up to a soft seat and recline back
>Anonymous reaches for a black belt and straps you in carefully
>His hands feel nice on your belly, but the belt is kind of tight
>"Safety first, Note. Also, I don't want a ticket."
>You shrug and just go with it
>He finally gets in on his side and turns a little metal key
>The sound of a hundred angry bulls suddenly lifts up and you scream in a journalistic way
>"Are you OK? What happened?!"
"Oh, that's the thing... that's making the noise?"
>"Yes, this car needs a tune-up..."
>Needs more than that, you think
>His hands and feet are everywhere as he drives
>Pushing buttons, pressing pedals, yelling at other cars with thick mouthfuls of slang
>Driving seems exhausting!
>"So, tell me. You hungry?"
>You nod slightly as you look out the window at the streets passing by
>So many lights and people and even ponies are littering the streets
>They even have litter littering the street and it fascinates you to see that
>"What do you feel like?"
"Oh, um, I don't know... what do you have here?"
>"Freakin' everything. You name it, I'll take you."
>Having all the choice in the world feels like having no choice at all
"How about... um, something fun?"
>"You know what pizza is?"
>You finally find something to relate to and you are going to make the most of this
"Do I ever! I've eaten at the best pizzerias in Equestria before!"
>"Great, what do you like on it?"
"Um, mushrooms... if you have those here?"
>He laughs and smiles to you while stopping the car
>"We invented mushrooms!"
>You are happy to hear that as the car starts moving again
"Hey, Anon, why do we keep stopping and going?"
>"Traffic... and people don't know how to drive at all."
"Too slow, huh?"
>"Yep, you're sharp as ever. Sorry if I am being so quiet. This is just new to me."
"Hah, well, yeah, pretty new for me too! I know you humans are tall, but I never realized just how tall."
>"I work with ponies at my job, so you look just about right. You're mane's way nicer than them though."
>The compliment catches you off guard and you lose your voice for the moment
>You swallow hard and look back to him
"Ha, yeah, y-you too!"
>"Was it hard getting here? I heard that you guys have to jump through all kinds of hoops?"
"I'll say, especially the last, big metal hoop!"
>He blinks at you and you try to reason it
"Yeah, it's like this big metal hoop... and I had to jump through it, like literally, jump!"
>He smirks a bit at you and you feel your face grow hot with blush
>Quick, change the subject!
"Y-you sound just like I thought you would."
>"You're way louder than most ponies I've met. Sometimes, you can't even understand what they're saying."
"Don't I know it!"
>You stop once more, but this time, the angry car turns off and the air is still
>Your body is still shaking though as you step from the car
>"This is Mario's... best slice in the city. They don't mind ponies too much."
>Why would any humans mind ponies?
>You step in and hear a jingle before looking around
>Everyp0ny inside is not a pony at all!
>It feels weird to you, kind of heavy, but you make your way inside
>The store is small, not as small as some places in Ponyville, but still small
>"Hey, Mario!"
>Yo', Anon! What's good?"
>"Pizza, man, I need a pie."
>The man known as Mario is wearing standard chef clothing and has a dark, curly mane
>"Just hang tight, Anon. Let me deal with the horses first."
>"No, no, she's with me."
>He lets out a deep laugh and kind of chokes as he breathes in
>"No wait, what is this, extra credit?"
>"Nah, she's a friend. A -reporter- even!"
>"Oh snap, am I under arrest by the fluff-ball police? Hahah!"
>"If you don't stop F-ing around, man..."
>"Alright, alright, what can I get you? Just so you know, we ain't got hay."
>You kind of don't get the joke, but he laughs anyways
>"No biggie... large pie with mushrooms and extra cheese."
>"Sure thing, be about 20 minutes."
>Anonymous pays and you sit down at a table for the moment
>A human looks at you suspiciously and you take this as a sign of possible conversation
>You quickly hold out a hoof to them and smile
"Noteworthy, columnist! Nice to meet you..."
>You try to lead them into giving you their name, but they stand up and walk to a farther table
>Fine by you, they're mane was ugly anyways
>Anonymous yells across the room to you in the corner
>"Hey! What do you drink?"
>You figure this is normal and call back
"Water, please!"
>The sound of laughter follows Mario while he walks to the counter and looks to Anon
>"Oh, man! Is this a date?"
>"Something like that."
>"I thought you of all people would swing towards... you know? People. At least women from Boston, at the very least!"
>You listen and grow steadily embarrassed
>Is this considered casual conversation?
>At any rate, you're getting kind of iffy staying here any longer
>Anonymous returns with two cups and two straws
>He passes you your water and drinks some kind of soda water
>You find yourself trying to be quiet and invisible, until Anon snaps you out of it
>"You ever have Coke before?"
>Anon passes you his cup and you look down at it
>You are here to learn and explore, now is good as time as any!
>Your lips wrap around the straw and you take a sip of your first Coke
>Almost instantly, the sugary drink fills your stomach with the finest of feelings and you smile widely
>"Figured you'd like that since you told me you like stuff like cupcakes."
>You don't listen too well as the drink takes hold of your senses and you finish the cup
>When there is nothing left, you slurp at the very corners to get any residual Coke at the bottom
>"You want me to get you a cup instead of water?"
>You look up with wide eyes and nod silently
>This must be what rainbows taste like
>Anon is quick with both of your cups and you drink this one a little slower
>It is so amazing and you can't help but feel you have missed so much until today
>"Glad you like it. Don't fill up on that stuff though. You'll feel sluggish all day."
>Nothing this delicious is ever good for you, but you can't stop
"This place is kind of nice after all..."
>The smell of delicious mushrooms suddenly hits your nose and you turn to see a steaming pizza sitting on the counter
>"Did you want to eat here or head to my place?"
>You look to Anonymous and then to the soda machine
"Lets... lets eat here..."
>"If you want, sure."
>Anonymous grabs the box and some utensils before returning to you
>« Bon appétit, ma chère ! »
"You speak French?"
>"Only what I've heard on TV."
>Anon grins slightly before offering you a piece of pizza
>You take a slice and admire how big a single piece is
>It must be because humans are bigger so they need more food
>That makes sense in theory, even if some of the humans here are smaller
>Upon taking your first bite, you realize that this pizza will be ruining the taste of all other pizzas forever
"Anon... this is fantastic... it's impossibly good!"
>"Yeah, it's pretty awesome."
>He munches through a slice with practiced grace as you struggle to eat just one
>You drink yourself silly on three more glasses of Coke before finally falling over in your seat
"So full... can't breathe..."
>A long, tired sigh escapes your lips
>Mario is suddenly beside you and staring down
>"So, how was the food?"
"The best, sir. By Celestia, I'm in love with these mushrooms."
>"Hey, good to hear! You should put my name in the paper. Maybe I'll even give a pony discount!"
>He laughs hard at the word before calming down
>"Discount... Haha. Oh, I crack myself up."
>"Thanks for being friendly, Mario."
>"What, are you kidding me? You're my best customer, Anon! How could I turn down your girlfriend?"
>Your ears perk at the phrase and you quickly look to Anon
>"What's girlfriend mean?"
>Anon looks across the table casually and shrugs
>"It's like, 'Special Somep0ny' for humans."
"Oh, haha... No, wait! We're not like that!"
>You wave your hooves at Mario quickly
>"Don't worry, Anon. I'm all about free love. Just yesterday I got engaged to my fryer, true story!"
>He laughs, but Anon seemed a little annoyed now
>His angry face kind of reminds you of guards who work at Canterlot Castle
>"Yeah, yeah, keep making jokes. Remember how tips work, Mario..."
>The chef is suddenly a little somber
>"Hey, Anon, you know I'm playing around, right?"
>"That's what I thought you were doing. But, we got to go anyways. I promised a full tour of this place."
>"Sure, sure, just stay away from Little Italy meat markets!"
>Mario's face turns red with choking laughter as he walks off
"What's that mean?"
>"Eh, I'll tell you later once you've forgot about it."
>The statement confuses you and you are sure there's a reason Anon doesn't want to say
>It is a short trip back into the car, but you do your part to get in and buckle up yourself
"I can't believe how much food we still have! What's up next?"
>"Not sure, not much scheduled for today."
>You pass by a street corner and see a human standing by a lot of small clothing
>A sign says, "Pony-Chic" and you question what that's suppose to mean
>From your window, you see a few ponies inside the store itself wearing clothes and playing with clothes
"Anon, you know why everyp0ny's wearing clothes?"
>"It's a thing here. This is NYC, fashion is popular. I don't think we've ever talked about clothes before."
>A nagging feeling finally makes you question your own body
"Am -I- naked here?"
>"What? Um, I think so? I don't know."
"I don't want to look like I'm out of place now... would give away my journalistic intentions!"
>Anon laughs
>"You are on vacation, remember?"
"A journalist's vacation, it's different."
>"I guess the question is, do you want to go shopping?"
>You fidget and shrug once
"Need to change my bits in for cash money."
>Anon holds out his wallet and it unrolls smoothly
>You see lots of different plastic cards inside
>"Pick one..."
>You look around and finally decide to take the green card because it matches your mane
>"A-Mex, good choice."
>You smirk, not entirely sure what you just did
>Anon drives around for a little while until finally finding a place to park
>Cars seem like a lot of work and you are glad you don't bother with one
>The store is big from the outside, even bigger when you finally enter
>So amazingly big that the humans have elevators and a type of stairs called escalators
>The escalators confound you; why would you have stairs that walk for you?
>A smell of fresh linen, wildflowers and cinnamon hits your nose
>You just have no idea where any of this is coming from when all you can see is clothing
>"So, Note... what do you usually wear?"
"I... have a hat with a number card in it? Mostly for media presentations..."
>"You never wear clothes?"
"Not really, no. I know humans have to, you explained that. Maybe, just look around?"
>"That could take a while. Tell you what, lets hit up the unicorn stuff first."
>You're a bit interested to learn that humans spent time making a line of clothing just for unicorns
>"Never been there before, but I'm sure there's something you might like."
>You both walk around the store and notice workers range from humans to ponies, leaning slightly more towards ponies and then even slightly more towards pegasus
>A large, hanging sign reads, "Unicorn 1-4" and another reads, "Foals and Fillies"
>You head into the unicorn isle and see rows of hanging outfits
>This area is slightly more colorful than the Earth pony section you passed
>Do humans think unicorns are brighter?
>Your train of thought derails as Anonymous starts laughing
"What? What is it?"
>He reveals an outfit to you that looks like a pink tutu with glittering dust on it
"Who in the right mind would ever wear that?"
>"Heh, no one in the right mind should!"
"What do the numbers mean on the hanger?"
>"Generic sizes, I have no idea how clothes work. Just wing it."
>You find a purple shirt with vertical black stripes and a pair of pants colored black
"This look like they would fit..."
>You stick your head into the shirt and straight it around your legs with your magic
>"Don't get-! No wait, maybe it is alright..."
"What's the matter?"
>"I was going to take you to the changing room, but you did walk in here without clothes on anyways... just stay the course."
>The shirt fits neatly and feels light and airy
>You step into the pants and lift them up your backside
>The tail hole is a bit too narrow for you, but you give it a try
>A waistband gets stuck at your rump and you give a hard tug with your magic
>Anon turns his face from you as you continue
>"Uh, that's probably a little small around your... assets..."
"I suppose... do you see a pair like this that is bigger?"
>You try to pull the pants down only to find that your tail and, surely evenly proportioned, bottom are stuck
>Another tug does nothing and you look to Anon quickly
"I'm stuck..."
>"How did you get stuck?"
"It doesn't matter, just... help me out here!"
>You back up towards him and his eyes seem to be plastered open
>"O-OK, just hold still, alright?"
"Hurry, I can't feel my tail!"
>Anon's cool hands soundly slip into your pants on either side
>It feels strange as he gives it a good tug downward and the waistband pops off
>Your rump feels cooler, either from the open air or Anon himself, and his fingers glide down your legs
>"There we go... not so bad..."
"What was that?"
>"Nothing! Just, um... thinking out loud!"
>You step from the pants and turn around
>Anon has a hint of color on his cheeks and you stare at him strangely
"What's wrong? Aren't you use to seeing ponies without clothes?"
>"Not really... also, that was kind of really close..."
>You never thought your boastful friend would be so bashful
>Surely, humans have to do this kind of thing all the time for ponies in need!
>You begin to rummage through the racks again until you come upon a pair of shorts made of some kind of soft denim
"Hey, Anon, do these looks nice?"
>"The hell? They sell Daisy Dukes for ponies?"
>Anon seems a little nervous to you, but you're not really sure why
>You hang the shorts back up and shrug
"Well, do I need to wear pants?"
>"If you want to, sure, wear what you like."
>You slip the shirt from your frame and hang it up somewhere
>It wasn't really as comfortable as it started out to be
"What would a journalist wear in this city?"
>"I thought you wanted to be undercover?"
"Well, I suppose... well, I need help here!"
>You must have trigger some alarm or maybe said the magic words because three ponies and two other humans suddenly appear at your location
>A unicorn in the group smiles as she looks you over and the other four plod away in defeat
>She stands a bit taller than you and has a two-toned mane of blue and pink
>Her eyelashes are curled and her hooves are so shiny
>You are kind of jealous that she looks that pretty, but you won't tell them that
>"Did somep0ny need help?"
"I did?"
>"Fabulous! My name is Tropical Berry, but you can call me Terri! What did you need help with today?"
"This is my first time on Earth and I don't want to look too suspicious. You have any normal clothes for normal ponies, such as myself?"
>Her eyes narrow on you and she sizes you up
>"Follow me!"
>Terri darts off in one direction and you need to trot to keep up
>She moves really fast for somep0ny with such finely polished hooves!
>"Here we are! This season, we have a great line-up from some of the biggest names in fashion!"
>Terri begins pulling clothing left and right and stacking them up in her magic
>"I think you'll look great in something that shows off a bit of tail..."
>She nudges your chest before looking up at Anon
>"... Your boyfriend'll surely think so."
"My... boyfriend?"
>Before you can follow up with yelling and correcting, Terri pulls you into a smaller room
>The world spins around you as her magic quickly pops the first outfit on
>You stumble from the dressing room and look to Anon
"How do I look?"
>You are wearing a short, pink skirt that just barely covers your butt and a white top
>"The question is, how do you feel?"
>A grumble erupts from you as you enter into the room again and change into the next outfit
"What about this? Hey, look!"
>This outfit is made of a pair of airy, blue shorts that cut off right above your haunches and a thin, but long-sleeve black shirt
>"Whatever you like..."
>Anon is starting to get on your nerves with his indifference
>You stomp into the room and put on the last outfit
>It immediately makes you feel peaceful and you look yourself over in the mirror
>A light green dress that ends a few inches above your hooves goes so well with the white T-shirt
>You step from the dressing room once more and Anon's eyes instantly fall on you
>"Oh, hey, that looks nice..."
>Your heart nearly flutters for the moment when you see he really notices you
>It is nice knowing that he is paying attention to you, nothing else, you try to think
"I think I'll take this..."
>Terri appears beside you with a frantic looking smile
>"Oh, good choice! Ponies usually enjoy this ensemble by Ralph Lauren."
>Anon's eyebrow lifts and falls at the name
>"That's really a Ralph Lauren dress?"
>"Oh, yes, Mr. Lauren just adores ponies. He has been making clothing for us for as long as ponies have been around!"
>"Go figure..."
>Anon shrugs a little and smiles to you
>"You look great, Note. It's like you've lived here your whole life."
>Terri nudges your flank once and whispers rather loudly
>"Oh-ho, you two love doves. Just try not to damage those new clothes!"
"We are -not- love doves..."
>You say with all the merit you think you can muster before walking beside Anon and rubbing your face against his leg
"Thanks for all of this."
>He seems a little nervous at your display of affection
>"N-no problem! What are pen pals for?"
>Terri makes a quick snorting noise
>"Snrk... Pen pals. You kids and your innuendo."
>You and Anon walk off to a cash register and pay for your new outfit
>The human at the desk says you can even wear it home, which is nice, but you don't think you'll wear it all the way back to Ponyville
>After all, you still have a week here with Anon!
>Stepping out into the world again, you take the time to study your surrounding
"Anon... can we just hoof it for a while? The car is kind of... not fun for me."
>"Sure, we're actually not too far from something I wanted to show you anyways."
>Anon and you begin walking down the sidewalk while cars pass you by
>There is a system here, but it is tricky to get down
>You stop when the little man in the pole says stop, but even when he says you can go, cars might still be driving by
>Anonymous is pretty savvy and you follow him closely
>The walk feels good on your legs and the new clothes change the whole atmosphere
>You feel like you could really live in a place like this if you tried hard enough
>The smell of the ocean suddenly hits your nose and you look around
"You smell water?"
>"Yep, coming up to a nice little spot now."
>You see a bridge stretch straight across the ocean in a marvel of engineering that could only have been built by ten schools of architects led by Celestia herself
"That's amazing... where are the magic bulbs that power the floating platforms?"
>"Do what now?"
"You know? The bulbs? They probably have a real name, I don't know it."
>He looks at you oddly for the moment before chuckling
>"We don't have magic here. This thing is made of solid materials like steel and concrete and such."
>You eye the structure again and wonder just how long this took to build without magic
>A sudden gust blows your skirt upward and you try to hold it down with a hoof
>Anon giggles a bit to himself at your frustration
>"Back up a bit!"
>You do so with some measure of success
>Skirts are tricky business on bridges!
>Anon walks towards some kind of large metal thing that is near an edge overlooking the water
>You follow him and he taps the machine a few times
>"You can get a good look over the water with this. Want to try it?"
>Anon pops a silver coin into the machine and you hear a click of turning gears
"I don't know... not seeing any better."
>His hands suddenly scoop you up from behind
>You are lifted off the ground until your eyes meet with the lenses of the machine
"Oh wow..."
>The beauty of the open water rivals that of any ocean you've seen back home
>There are a range of birds in the sky and a number of things straight ahead that remind you of boats, only much bigger than any in Equestria
"What a scoop! This is incredible!"
>"Glad you like it."
"What are those things in the water?"
>Anon dips you slightly lower so he can take a look
>"Whales? Probably whales..."
"You have those too?"
>"I guess so, yeah."
"Up! Lift me up again! I want to see more!"
>He does as you command and you enjoy the view for another minute or so
>The shutters close and the sound of mechanics turning interrupts you
"Times up, I take it?"
>"Yes, but not a problem, we got a lot of stuff for tomorrow."
"What kind of stuff?"
>"Not wanting to ruin the surprise, but, spoilers! Boat ride!"
>You've never been on a boat before!
>The excitement in you has reached a whole new level now
>Anon looks down to his arm at his time piece and sighs
>"It's starting to get late. We should probably head to my place and I'll make us some dinner."
"What about the pizza we have?"
>"Yeah, we could nuke it."
>You don't know what nuking it would do or what it even means, but trust Anon's judgment on this
>The sun hangs low in the sky as the time passes
>Walking through the city is incredible and you stare up at all the tall buildings
>Like towers, but towers on top of towers!
>So close to the clouds that you would swear they could scrape the sky
>That would be a good name for them, you think, cloud-scratchers!
>"What are you looking at?"
"Hmm? Oh, the tops of the buildings."
>Anon chuckles lightly and joking mocks you for being a tourist
"Hey, are you off work this week too?"
>"Yeah, took off the whole wee to see you around town."
"I kind of wanted to see what you did. I mean, it sounded great on paper. Anonymous the Veterinarian! Who'd have thought that humans were already inventing medicine for ponies before our worlds even met!"
>He laughs a bit
>"Well, we can certainly visit the clinic if you want. It is not really all that exciting. Your job sounds way more fun. I'd love to get to travel around and write articles about the people I meet and the places I see."
"It's a pretty great job, I'll admit. But, sometimes you go places that just stink. You might not believe it, but not everyp0ny is so friendly."
>"Nah, you don't say?"
>He beams at you and you can almost see the sarcasm drip from his mouth
>You make it to Anon's car and hop in for another ride
>The drive takes you from the heavily crowded city to a place a little more spacious
>You see green grass for the first time and the buildings spread out just a bit more than before
"Wow, this place is pretty. You live around here?"
>"Yes, not much further ahead. Going to be the brick house by the stop sign."
>Anonymous drives his car up a black paved hill and parks carefully
>Stepping out and looking around, you see the house in the gloomy light
"This place is kind of big... how many other people live with you?"
>"No one, this is my house."
>He leads you up a nice stone path and you admire the colorful flowers everywhere
>You sniff at a few pink hibiscus and smile at the fragrance
>"You like those?"
"Yes, they are lovely."
>"You can take one with you, if you want."
"Don't mind if I do..."
>You quickly snatch one in your mouth and chew merrily
>Anon sure knows how to grow some taste flowers!
>He stares at you quickly before shaking his head
"Oh, sorry, did you want one too?"
>"No, no, it's alright... I forgot."
>You swallow the delicious snack and look up at him
"Forgot what?"
>"Nothing... Hah, lets get you settled in."
>The door opens to the huge house and you walk in slowly
>It smells like lemon and wood and of human
>Definitely an interesting mixture, but not bad!
"So... you live here by yourself?"
>"Yep, why? Looks under furnished, doesn't it?"
"No, no, I mean, it's like eight of my houses put together."
>"Your whole house is as small as my kitchen?"
"Probably, yeah... Humans must really love big things."
>You go back to your original theory that big creatures need big things
>"Lets get your things up stairs to the guest bedroom. I hope you like down comforters."
>Up or down, comforters never really mattered
>You climb the large stairs carefully and find your room
>The bed is large enough for you and three friends to share and you spy a writing desk in the corner
"It's... beautiful..."
>"Great, you can hang up your clothes in the closet when you don't feel like wearing them. I do laundry every other day."
>Anon's place is amazing so far and you feel the need for a tour
"What about the bathroom? The basement? Do humans use basements? Why didn't I ever ask that in our letters? Do you have an attic?"
>"I do have a basement, but no attic in this place. the guest bathroom is across from your room."
>Anon flips a switch on the wall and you see the bathroom light up
>You need to remember that trick!
>"I bought a special seat for the toilet so you should be able to reach and use it just fine."
>That was kind of weird, but helpful anyways
"How different can human toilets be?"
>"Not very, but they are a little taller than most ponies can comfortably sit."
>You kind of feel self-conscious thinking about using Anon's bathroom
>What if you have to go and it smells extra bed and he says something?
>You begin to wonder how long you can hold it in
>"There's also a stool and grip bar on the sink with a new toothbrush and pony-sensitive toothpaste. I know it's not common for most ponies to brush their teeth, but I've met all kinds at this point."
"Thanks, but my dentists just checked me out and she said I'm doing good."
>He smiles and nods easily
>"Good, good. Want to head out back next? I could show you the yard if you want to get some stretching in while you're here."
>Now that sounds like a great idea to you
>Anon and yourself make it to the backyard in moments and you look over the fancy scenery
>There is a swimming pool in one corner that looks really nice with a wooden deck around it
>You know humans can swim very well because Anon told you all about his coworkers and how they had to, "Sink or swim"
>Human employment seems to be much more physical sometimes!
>Aside from the pool, these is a fairly large open area that you could run around
"Ah, that pool looks awesome! We should go in it tomorrow when it's sunny again."
>"It's pretty hot tonight, we could go in it now if you wanted?"
"Silly Anon, it's too dark to see where you're swim-"
>Anon suddenly brandishes a small black remote of obviously magical origins and presses a button
>The entire pool comes to life with lights and glows a faint blue
"Underwater lighting?! Now that's a story!"
>"I'm going to get changed into swimwear. Did you bring a bathing suit?"
"A what now?"
>"Lets make it our business to buy you one tomorrow."
>Anon vanishes into the house and you stand around wondering what he's up to
>He soon appears again wearing nothing but a pair of black shorts
>His shoulders are broad and he has a very nice chest, you think
>As he climbs the steps of the pool, you watch his bum in the most journalistic way you can
>Thank goodness you don't have wings right now
>"Hmm, you should take off those nice clothes. Would hate to get them wet."
"Too late..."
>"What was that?"
"I said you're right! Ha ha! Let me just go change into... nothing..."
>Keep it together, Note!
>You've seen pictures of humans without their clothes and Anon is no different!
>Well, you suppose he is real and not a picture in a book
>You take off your outfit and leave the clothes laying on a nearby chair
>Being without clothing does make you feel better for a bit
>Feels a little more like home and you triumphantly walk out into the warm night
>Anon is bobbing on the ledge of the pool and you don't keep him waiting
"Is it cold?"
>"It is kind of cool, but not bad."
>You shiver once so your fur rises and you throw your body in at once
>The shock of cool water on your warm skin makes you tingle everywhere and your tail ruffles
>Under the water, everything is pretty bright and very blue
>You see half of Anon before he ducks into the water with you
>It is almost unfair how much human skin shines when wet and you have to force the thought out of your head a few times
>You both breach the surface and breathe deeply before he looks you over
>"Maybe I should have bought something for your hair. Does it take you long to style it?"
"Style? What do I look like, a show pony?"
>"You -don't- style your hair? How does it get like that?"
>You shrug quickly and brush your wet mane to one side
"I wake up, wash it, brush it, and then go outside. I don't usually have time to style it or else it'll look much nicer!"
>"I think it's great the way it is."
>You feel a thump in your chest and dip half your face in the water
>It's weird, you think, that he always compliments you when you're so obviously a plain-Jane
>Not as plain as Vanilla Cream from work, but still pretty average!
"T-thanks... I really like your mane cut too..."
>It looks good for a human's head, you think
>Really good for Anonymous
>You feel your face get hotter as you think about it
>Anon doesn't seem to notice how hard you are blushing and instead looks to the sky
"What's up?"
>You tilt your head back and check to see for yourself
>"Stars are coming out. You can't see them in the city at night."
>The stars on Earth look very similar to the stars in Equestria
>Lots of white dots on a black canvas with not a whole lot going on
"I still have trouble understanding how you can have night and day without a princess."
>"Earth is based more on magnets then on magic."
"Magnets? How do they work?"
>"Don't ask me, I was sure they were the same thing for the longest time. In short, Earth spins around the sun and the moon spins around the Earth. It takes 365ish days for the Earth to go around the sun one time and only 30 or so days for the moon to go around the Earth."
"Equestria has it down to a science! Two princesses, one raises and sets the sun, one raises and sets the moon. So much easier that way."
>"It's amazing how that works. You unicorns are really powerful, right?"
>You puff out your chest and tilt your horn in a bit
"Oh, just about. We're pretty great."
>"What is your special brand of magic?"
"Glad you asked, my savvy friend! Not sure what other unicorns you hang around with, but they taught you well. My talent is reporting what I see."
>"How does that translate to magic?"
>Anon swims a little closer to you with a look of awe on his face
"Simple, I can project events I directly witness onto a flat surface so that anyp0ny could watch it with me. I'm the only unicorn I know who can do it."
>"That is really cool. Can you show me?"
>You nod and find the idea of Anon wanting to see your magic very endearing
>The side of the house closest to the pool looks good enough and you think about an event from this morning
>Your horn begins to glow a pale yellow before a beam fires at the siding
>A screen a few feet wide by a few feet tall opens up and shows you the events from this morning through your eyes
>You play back the moment you hop into the portal that lead to Anon's world and when you first see him
>"That is amazing! The point of view is kind of odd though... for me, I guess."
"Well, yeah, you silly giant!"
>Anon chuckles with you and splashes a little water in your direction
>You giggle and duck away before returning his splashes
>A small water fight erupts between you two and you laugh the whole way through
>Anon suddenly dives under the water and swims up to you
>You try to paddle away as quickly as you can, but he swims like a barracuda!
>He bursts from the water in a huge wave and squeal in parts fear and parts excitement
>Your horn reacts and shields your face with a barrier of magic
>"Hey! No magic in the pool!"
"We didn't make that rule! I can't swim as fast as you, so magic is fine!"
>You use your horn to twirl the water into a jet and splash Anon
>Another splash signals that Anon has disappeared beneath the water and you see him quickly speeding towards you
>This is so much fun, you think, as Anon emerges behind you
>You laugh from the splash and hear Anon's own chuckle before quickly turning around
>Without realizing just how close he was, your face smacks against his bare chest with a wet splotching noise
>You sit there for a moment with your face pressed against Anon's strong human body
>He doesn't move and you devise that moving first would be a faux pas
>His skin is cool on your own and you unconsciously work your whole body a little closer
>"Ha, sorry, guess I popped up a little closer than I thought."
"Y-yeah... Hah? How weird..."
>Anon pulls back slowly and his presence is replaced with lonely night air
>You snap yourself back to reality, despite that phrases being so wrong at this current time
>"Sorry... if I got too close..."
"No, no, it's fine... lets just... I think I'm actually going to get out. My hooves are starting to get soggy."
>Anon looks at you curiously and seems to be thinking really hard about soggy hooves
>It absolutely happens, just not right now
>You step out and shake yourself dry before letting your fur fall into place
>Your mane slicks wetly over one eye and you blow it out of the way
>Anon pulls himself from the pool and you turn to him
>You had something on your mind, it was going to be a great question
>Unfortunately, the moonlight hits his glistening body and he slicks his mane back slowly while flexing his arms
>By Celestia, this is difficult!
>No mare should ever have to be put under this kind of stress while on vacation!
>"Oh, hey, Note. You want a towel?"
"P-please..."
>Anon opens up some unforeseen compartment and quickly tosses you a towel
>He wraps one around his waist, to your relief and you wrap up your mane
>"Nothing like a good swim, right? Best exercise you can get!"
"Is that why I'm so hungry again?"
>Anon chuckles and enters his home through a glass door
>You follow in kind and find yourself that this entrance leads directly to the kitchen
>"What can I get you?"
"We still got pizza?"
>"Yeah, hang on. Going to throw it in the oven for a few."
>Anon slides about the kitchen with a smile on his face all in the name of pleasing you
>"Oh, you want to watch a movie? I remember you telling me you liked comedy shows."
"Is the theater open?"
>"Well, sure, but I mean we can stay here and watch a movie. I got Netflix."
>You don't know what that is, but Anon thinks it's something special
>He leaves the kitchen and moves to the living room
>There is yet another remote on the couch and this one controls a television screen
>The size of this TV is actually closer to the size of your bed back home
>It comes to life with the most realistic sound and vivid colors you have ever seen
>"Thousands of movies to choose from in hundreds of categories!"
>He holds the remote before you
>"Whatever you'd like, we can watch it."
>You slowly grip the remote in your magic and let the glow slide from button to button
"OK... lets see."
>You start clicking around while Anon disappears into the kitchen
>The first thing that strikes you as interesting is that some older movies from Equestria are listed on the channels
>Do humans enjoy pony films?
>You continue to browse for what feels like forever and find the burden of choice thrust on you again
>Humans make a lot more movies than you could ever watch, you think
>The next icon over lights up as you tap the remote and the preview of the movie appears
>A song plays first over a black background before a white blob appears on the screen
>The white blob is suddenly obscured by a red cancelling sign
>You see Anon enter the room wearing a black and green stripped pair of pajamas and carrying a pizza
>Anon steps in with a wide grin on his face and suddenly begins singing to the movie
>"When there's something strange/in your neighborhood. Who you gonna call?/Ghostbusters!"
>You burst into a fit of laughter, both with the movie and Anon himself
"What is this?"
>"Ghostbusters, classic film. It's pretty good if you want to watch it."
"Sure, why not?"
>"I think you'll enjoy it. Pizza?"
>You smell the delicious mushroom aroma and sigh happily
"Thank you for everything, Anon. Today has been so much fun..."
>You take a bite of the cheesy goodness and fan your mouth
>Terrible mistake to eat freshly baked pizza like that!
>Anon places a cup beside you and unveils a massive bottle of the delicious nectar of Earth; Coke-Cola
>You want to cry out in joy, but hot cheese scolds your mouth
>Anon pats the couch beside him and looks to you with expectant eyes
>A sip of soda helps pass the gooey, burning pizza and you blink the pain from your throat
>"You don't mind sitting next to me, right?"
"Hah, why would -I- mind being with my best friend on Earth!?"
>You climb up on the couch and find a cool spot against Anon
>He holds you closely as you watch the movie begin and the lights turn out
>Pizza, Coke, Anon... you wouldn't be surprised if you wake up right now from this impossible dream
>You jab yourself in the neck quickly just to be sure
>Nope, definitely awake!
>The movie comes and goes with you paying attention only when Anon seems to be excited about it
>As much as you want to watch, the feeling of pressing against Anon's body is too exquisite to pass up
>Perhaps you didn't want to watch a movie as much as you thought
>Regardless, you are as happy as you can be just snuggling with Anon in the most journalistic fashion you'd like to imagine
>Anon stretches out around you and you let out a yawn
>"We should probably hit the hay... I mean, go to bed."
>You flip your tail up and pet Anon's cheek
"Today was amazing. Think you'll have anymore surprises left tomorrow?"
>"My dear, Noteworthy, we've only just begun."
>Anonymous looks to you with brilliant eyes and his signature grin
>You etch the image into your mind and sigh
"I... I'm going to bed now... See you in the morning."
>You reluctantly leave his side and slowly walk up the stairs to your room
>Crawling into bed, you find yourself thinking more about him than ever
>He is just yards away from you now and it feels further than before
>You don't remember his letters being like this or his picture making you feel so vulnerable
>Is it wrong to feel the way you feel right now?
>You have heard and even seen pony and human couples, it could happen!
>A frustrated feeling runs up the length of your belly and back down to your tail
"Anon won't mind if I do this here... probably... I'll just clean it up, yeah, because that's what good friends do."
>You place a hoof to your eager sex and flash your magic at the wall ahead of you
"At least I've got some nice material to work with, heh."
>You replay the scene of Anon strutting about the pool before working through one of the most agonizing nights of your young life
>Sometimes, you need a little -you- time to start thinking clearly again
>Sometimes, you just need a little squeeze!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

>Night Uncomfortably Unfamiliar on Earth
>Be Noteworthy
>You find yourself waking up periodically and checking the clock
>1 AM, still in the human world
>2 AM, still in a human bed
>By the third time, you realize you are going to be dragging tomorrow if you don't get some sleep
>You think a drink might calm your nerves or maybe writing a letter will ease your mind
>The clock to your bedside reads 3 AM now and you kick the blankets off your body
>It is cooler this way, at the very least
"Sleep, Note... Go to bed. You need energy for tomorrow. Come on..."
>A noise suddenly catches your attention and you look out the window
>Rain is lightly pattering around outside
>You suddenly realize that you don't know who controls the weather on Earth
>It would make a great story from Anon, you are sure
>A flashes catches your eye as if somep0ny took your picture before a boom rings through the house
>No pony generated storm ever sounded so loud or built up so quickly in your life
>Fearfully, you run from the room as quickly as your hooves can take you until you find yourself at Anon's door
>It is cracked open and you push into the wooden obstruction with blatant disregard for anyp0ny else
>You look to Anon sleeping soundly in his bed and think that maybe the storm isn't reaching this part of the house
>Another eruption of thunder sends chills from your tail to your horn and you leap into the air
>Anonymous doesn't so much as stir from all of this
>You hate admitting your scared and thank the heavens that there is no one to admit to right now
>Consequences aside, you hop into Anon's bed and stuff your head under a pillow
>You shake for a few moments until you feel a cool something touch your flank
>"Note? Noteworthy?! What's going on?"
"Anon, something's wrong with the weather!"
>A boom thunder strikes extremely close and the whole room shakes
>You squeal with terror and Anon looks around carefully
>"Y-you're scared of thunder?"
"No! I am totally fine with it!"
>"You look like you're about to wet yourself..."
"Something is wrong with this thunder! I didn't hear anything from the weather ponies! It's a totally unscheduled storm!"
>"Think the news said scattered showers... 20% chance or so. It's nothing, really."
"Do you hear how loud it is? That is not nothing!"
>"Man, 3 AM... Get some sleep, Note."
"I was trying and then all of -this- just started."
>"Fine, I don't care, I'm too tired to argue. Just... I don't know, just lay down and get some sleep."
>You stop quivering like a newborn just long enough to question him
"Y-you'd let me sleep next to you?"
>A booming noise causes you to nearly spring through the wall and you take Anon up on his offer without further interrogating
>You press against his body hard enough for him to cough a little as you settle in
>"Take it easy, you..."
"Weather ponies always come around to tell everyp0ny before they make a storm..."
>"It's a little different here... I'll tell you in the morning."
>A chill runs up your spine again, but you aren't sure if it is the noise or Anon's cold hands wrapping around your belly
>Truth be told, you manage to block out the storm in record time
>Anon's body rolls up against your own and you feel his face on the back of your neck
>Is he trying to get closer?
>Your tail wraps between his legs and you hold on lightly
>Amazingly, you close your eyes and cope with the storm until finally passing out
>Being scared is exhausting!

>Day For Lack of Blankets on Earth
>Be Anonymous
>You awake to see the sun is already up and your head aches lightly from some pressure
>Turning yourself around, you find a pony snoozing sounding on the better half of your body
>"So, I wasn't dreaming that..."
>Your arm is wrapped around her back and to her belly and you cannot stop your hand from petting Note's warm stomach
>The feeling is exquisitely soft, almost like satin sheets
>Her mane is pushed far enough into your face that each breath draws in her smell
>It is some mixture of shampoo with a delicate aroma of straw and flax
>You try to dislodge yourself without waking her only to find that your leg is bound up by her tail
>For someone who's not afraid of thunder, she seemed to make damn sure you didn't go anywhere
>The clock reads out 8 AM in red letters and you sigh
"Note... hey... Note?"
>You tap her belly only to have her roll over
>Her face presses into your own and you try to move back
"Noteworthy, scoot over."
>"Five more minutes, dad..."
>Her leg wraps around your own and you can barely wiggle at the moment
>You prod her a little harder and see her eyes blink open
>"Oh, Anon... hey, what's up?"
>You feel her hips move about before she looks at you
>"Whoa, this is awkward, huh?! Good thing we didn't have any cider last night, am I right?"
>Her eyes are vibrantly colourful and spark with energy
"Can you please get off me so I can hit the bathroom?"
>"Oh, hah! S-sure! Let me just umm, untangle myself here..."
>Noteworthy fidgets about as you two unwind
>"Um, thanks for letting me sleep with you... I mean, here! With you, here, in this bed!"
"I know what you mean..."
>"So, um... Good, you're not weirded out by this! I am not either, for your information! I felt fine sleeping with y-, by you. Sleeping -by- you!"
>She blushes a shade of red you didn't know she could and just laugh
"We've talked about worse than this, Note! Sleepovers should be the gentlest topic we've ever seen."
>"Yeah, I know, right!? I mean, I'm fine, pfft, sleeping next to somep0ny! It's totally natural and like... natural and whatever..."
>You see her bury her face under a pillow as she continues to mumble
>It is funny to you to find her so nervous when her letters would involve all kinds of topics that boarded on the side of questionable
>You were not really nervous because you knew full well that you were in control
>She is your best friend after all, what difference does it make if she's not human?
>It's not like she isn't pretty or that you haven't given it thought
>You wouldn't want to force yourself on her
>But, what if she did want to get physical?
>You glance over yourself while you release your piddle and think carefully
>She is cute, funny, smart and witty when she puts her mind to it
>You could be in better shape, but it's not like you look awful
>A firm palm takes a quickly measurement of you most important feature
>If she wanted to do anything like -that-, you're sure that you would be more than enough
>But, what if she's been with stallions where she comes from?
>Sure, stallions are bigger than you and maybe she doesn't know what humans look like down there
>The more you think, the smaller you feel and the more nervous the prospect of sex becomes
"We don't need to do that... Two people could be friends without worrying about sex..."
>It makes a good bit of logical sense, but that little, illogical corner of your brain continues to nag at you
>You brush off the idea as best you can before starting a shower
>That should cool you down enough to get today started!

>On a fine mattress in impossible comfort
>Be Noteworthy
>You sniff greedily at the pillow on your face and take as much of the human smell as you can
>Anon must sleep here every night to make the linen smell so much like him
>Sheer exhaustion last night much have been the only thing keeping your body from drooling all over his legs
>Waking up on top of him was too much for you and the imagine sits neatly burned into your memory
"Calm down... easy... It would be rude to masturbate in Anon's bed. No matter how tempting."
>Why didn't somep0ny warn you he would smell so good?
>These are things a mare simply shouldn't have to find out the hard way!
>You toss a bit and wrap the blankets in your thighs
>You think about getting up and taking a bath for a moment, but decide to enjoy Anon's room a while longer
>It is quite plain, you think, with only a few pieces of furniture laying about the place
>He has his own television set in this room as well, which is unheard of in Equestria
>Television is fairly new and expensive, a single house would usually only have one TV in the main living room
>You have counted two in Anon's home so far and both are bigger than any TV back home
>After shifting uncomfortably against the blankets for a few moments, you unwrap yourself and touch down on the soft floor
>You admire the varies floor designs Anon has throughout his house
>Back home, all your floors are wood, but carpet is too expensive to clean anyways
>A closest door catches your attention and you decide to check it out
>Hanging neatly in some kind of plastic wrapping are six identical suits to what Anon always wears
>The closest smells like freshly washed wool and wildflowers
>Humans must have a thing for wildflowers, you ponder
>You close the door and your ears ping to one side at the sound of another door opening
>Anon steps in with a towel around his waist and water glistening off his body
>You've got to stop meeting like this!
"Oh, hey, Anon. Was your bath good?"
>"No complaints here. Mind stepping out for a moment? I need to get dressed."
"I don't mind at all..."
>He lifts an eyebrow at you before you realize what you said
>With a red face, you scamper past him and out into the hall
>Your heart throbs in your chest and seems to radiate straight to your nethers  as you stand outside Anon's doorway
>He reappears quickly enough and flashes you a smile
>"Alright, breakfast. What do you want?"
"Hmm, didn't you tell me before that you loved crepes?"
>"Sharp as ever, my friend."
"Well, I've been practicing!"
>"Do you really want to cook? We could go out for breakfast if it would be easier?"
>How easy it would be, but you have a point to prove to yourself!
"No, no, it's fine! I -want- to do this for you. You know? Because you've done so much already."
>Anon shrugs and heads down the stairs towards the kitchen
>You follow slowly trying to think through the limited recipes you know
>The kitchen area is really kind of intimidating and all the counters are kind of high
>You would only be able to reach the countertops by standing on your back hooves
>Thank Celestia you still have your magic!
>Anon gathers up his pans and some supplies and sets them out, but you shoo him away
"Anon, you have to relax while I cook for you or this isn't going to work!"
>"What isn't going to work?"
>Your eyes bounce around while you try to explain
"I want to do something nice for you, because you've done so much for me already. It's only fair that -I- can also be productive."
>"Aren't you on vacation?"
"You are too! Now sit down and let me make you some breakfast!"
>You scrunch your nose up in minor frustration as Anon grins a silly grin
>"Yes, honey."
>The comment rocks you a little with parts sarcasm and parts endearment
>You have to make this breakfast and you have to make it good!
>It's an excuse, a fine one at that, to show off your intuitive mare abilities
>It takes you a good half hour to prepare and you make a larger mess than you had wanted
>When the first bit of batter hits the hot skillet, you smile knowing that this is perfect
>Sadly, you burn the first one, but these things happen!
>The second, third and even fourth come out perfectly and by the sixth and final flat pancake, you hit your stride
>Meanwhile, Anon has been moving around to set the table, create a filling for the crepes and wash the dishes
>So much for him relaxing, but you suppose he never hinted at being the type to sit back
>You push the stack to one side and begin filling each shell generously
>Your magic folds them tight and you admire your work for the moment
>"They smell delicious, Note. Can't wait to try them."
>Recognition!
"What? This old recipe? Nothing to it!"
>You shine you hoof on your chest and beam towards Anon at the table
>The plate floats in your magic and you trot daintily across the ceramic floor to him
"The filling you made smells delicious. You remembered I like strawberries."
>"How could I forget?"
>He is just as charming as the letters would have you believe
>You feel like a lucky mare to have found a friend like him, even if he is human and it did take this long to get together
>With a smile, you place four of the delicious pastries before him
"Is that enough?"
>"For us to share?"
"No, silly, for you?"
>"I guess if I want to go back to bed, that'll do the trick."
>Anon smiles to you casually and brings a fork to his hand
"Humans are bigger than ponies, so I figured you'd need more food."
>Without warning, Anon takes a bit of his breakfast and pops it into your mouth
>"You're cute when you're making shit up, you know that?"
>The compliment barely registers in your mind as you stare into his gorgeous eyes
>Being fed like some prized mare by her stallion
>If ever one of your erotic novels sprang from its pages, it would look exactly like this
>Anon removes his fork slowly and you nearly whine in ecstasy
>Without wiping it, he picks up another bit of food and eats it
>You breathe heavily for a moment as you watch him
>It is like you've just kissed!
>"Note? You OK?"
"F-fine... so fine..."
>You sit beside him and cover your face with one hoof in a vain attempt to hide the blush spreading over your nose
"H-how's the food?"
>"Fabulous! Much better than where I was going to take you this morning."
"Heh, glad you like it..."
>You take your fork in your magic and devour a tasty crepe with little effort
>All this work this morning really got your appetite going and you work down another two before starting to feel satisfied
>Anon half watches you while eating and you notice that he only eats one before stopping
>So much for your original theory on human food
>"Simply fantastic, Note. You're a chef after all!"
>You let out a burp before covering your muzzle, but Anon returns it in kind
>"So... You feel like spending some time at the beach today?"
"Do I ever! Haven't had time to just relax on the sand in forever!"
>Anon nods to you and checks a flat electronic you haven't yet seen
>"Good timing too... hang on a moment while I make a call."
>Who's he going to call?
>Ghostbusters!
>Ahh, the theme is stuck in your head now!
>Anon produces a small, black rectangle from some hidden pocket on his clothing
>He rapidly taps at it until it glows
>If that is a phone, you are a giraffe!
>"Yes, hello? This is Anonymous. I'm going to be around at around 12:30 this afternoon. Right, exactly. Yes, fill her up too, thanks!"
>Anon hangs up his phone and your neck feels a little longer at the moment
"What was that about? What is that even?"
>"What, this?"
>Anon holds out the small device and you examine it closely
>"Cell phone. I suppose you don't have that in Equestria?"
"Not even a little! That's pretty nifty."
>The level of techno-sorcery on Earth would make for a great case study
>You have to yell at yourself to stop from drafting a document
>"We have a good three hours before we have to be at the docks. Lets get you something more comfortable for summer."
"More clothes?"
>"Yes, I've seen places that sell pony swimsuits."
"OK, let me just wash up first. I'll be out in 30 minutes!"
>You head upstairs while Anon begins washing the last few dishes
>It is not unusual for you to be able to shower and "dress" in mere minutes back home, but you find the chore of putting on multiple articles of clothing much more time consuming
>Your sure you'll get the hang of it as you continue
>It takes you nearly an hour when all is said and done, but you make it back down to Anon
>"Ah, I thought you got stuck in the drain."
>He shoots you a playful grin and holds his car keys closely
>Without wasting time on small talk, you head for the door and Anon follows quickly
>You are the first to the car and anxiously await for Anon to open the door
"Oh, this is so exciting! I love the beach! Do you think they'll have food carts selling cheesy pretzels?"
>You lick your muzzle as your mouth waters
>"Definitely by the boardwalk. We could stop their for lunch after a hard day of relaxing."
>Anon always seems to know just what to say
>He's very smart despite not being a pony!
>The car ride is the usual exhausting experience of vulgar language and nauseating speeds, but you arrive at your destination quickly enough
>You step out in front of a massive complex and find yourself surrounded by a parking lot
>The castle-like structure before you has massive blue lettering on the front that reads, "Wal-Mart"
>"This place has everything you'll ever need and half a dozen other things you didn't know you wanted."
"That's a store?"
>"A mega store."
"I'll say! It's big enough to house a small town in!"
>"And it makes more money than a small country! It is really a beautiful study in human values."
>Anon and yourself begin to make you way into the store
>The doors are nice enough to open for you and inside is delightfully cool
>Upon entering this palace to all things human, you feel surprisingly in your own element
>A sign hangs from the ceiling reading, "Welcome!", "¡Bienvenida!", and "ШƎLƆOПƎ"
>It surprises you that humans would go through the trouble to write in Equestrian
>"Alright, lets head to the clothing department. It is dangerous to wondering around here."
>You look to Anon at the word
"Why is it dangerous here?"
>"Because... I can never leave without spending $50 on things I don't even want."
>You chuckle and pat the back of his leg
"I'll make sure you don't buy anything except for the bathing suit."
>The rows of goods stretch on for possibly miles ahead of you as you read each sign above
"Ah, there it is!"
>You point towards a large sign reading, "Mares" and trot off ahead of Anon
>This place seems much more pony friendly than the last store you shopped in and you almost dare to question why
>Instead, you just begin to browse through the clothes
>It doesn't take long until you find a few items that look like they would fit
>Anon appears from behind you
>"Finding anything here?"
"I think so... um, what about this one?"
>You hold up a two-piece swimsuit that is green with red polka-dots
>Anon turns his eyes away as he speaks
>"Yeah, that's nice... whatever makes you happy."
>He can be so difficult to shop with sometimes, but you are sure somep0ny here will help you
>A human woman wearing a simple, blue vest passes by and you race to her
"Excuse me, miss! Hey there! Can I bother you for a minute?"
>The human looks to you with fairly blank eyes as you approach
>"What do you want?"
>Her tone is a little sharp, you think, but that is possibly normal for human woman
"I was wondering if you could help me decide on an outfit?"
>The woman tosses her head back and lets out a sigh of frustration
>"I'm not here for that. Go find a -pony- or whatever."
>She quickly walks off and you find yourself a little hurt
>Anon suddenly bursts from the isle and cuts the woman off with an unnatural fluidity to his step
>"You, -dreg-, I know you work a shit job at Wal-Mart, but it don't cost a cent to be a decent person..."
>He looks really angry, more so than when he's driving
>"Now, you own my little friend here an apology."
>"I'm not apologizing to a pony..."
>Anon's hand shoots at her vest and you hear the sound of something snapping
>He pulls back with a smile and you see a name tag in his hand
>"I'll just drop this off at the manager's desk for you."
>"What the hell are you doing?!"
>"Providing you with a means to find new employment. Think of it as helping you meet new people."
>The woman growls and swings her fist as Anon
>It collides with his chest with a sort of thudding sound and he looks up at her
>"And here I thought you didn't want to get into trouble."
>"Fuck you, asshole!"
>"Indeed..."
>A smile spreads across Anon's face as he places the name tag in his pocket
>"Go get your manager, girl, or escape from here while you can."
>The worker gives up and walks rapidly away from him with her fists balled
>Anon returns to your side and sighs unhappily
>"I am sorry, Note. She's just... do you have, 'bitches' where you come from?"
"Like... a curse word or the animal?"
>"The first."
"I see... well, I'm not really angry or anything. Thanks for standing up for me though!"
>"I can't see why people would be so inconsiderate."
"Well, back on topic. Which one should I get?"
>You hold up a blue and white striped one-piece swimsuit next and Anon looks it over
>"Is that going to fit?"
"Sure! I mean, it should, right? Says, 'Medium' on the inside."
>Anon leads you towards a dressing room and you step inside
>You first remove your "normal" clothes and set them neatly in a pile
>It takes a bit of wriggling to get the top half of the green bikini on, but it fits comfortably enough
>You next step into the bottom half and pull it up with your magic
>Your tail threads into the silver ring and you give a good tug to get it over your backside
>Looking in the mirror, you think you look pretty good
>The only concern is that the bikini bottom makes your butt look much bigger than you know it is
>Regardless, you step out and see Anon waiting with a dull look on his face
>The bored stare doesn't last long when he spots you and you strut a little more than you probably should towards him
"So, how does this look?"
>You smile as you stretch each hoof out and take long steps in a circle
>Your teasing pays off as Anon's face colors and he tries to talk coolly
>"Yes, excellent! Great choice! Just go undress... in the changing room, I mean."
>It always feels nice when you get him to notice that you're a mare
>While you dress, you wonder to yourself why Anon would get fluttery when you are wearing almost nothing and not when you're actually naked
>He is kind of odd sometimes and maybe clothing is his fetish or something!
>You push the thought aside and don your casual wear again
"Alright, all ready to go!"
>You burst from the dressing room with a smile only to see the angry girl from earlier and another human male talking with Anonymous
>"Sir, Alice says that you stole her badge. Is that true?"
>"Stole? I am many things, but not a thief. While I've got your attention, I'd also like to report this -Alice- for having a piss-poor attitude and being rude to a valued customer."
>The man speaking with Anon is wearing a blue vest, much like the girl's, but seems to have a few more pins on it
>He turns and looks at the girl quickly
>"Lets sort one thing out at a time. Do you have her ID?"
>Anon reaches into his pocket and dangles the name tag before him
>"I do. Now, my turn..."
>The man reaches for the badge, but Anon pulls it back quickly and holds it behind his back
>"First and foremost, do not shrug a customer off like they are yesterday's trash. That is not the way to do things. Secondly, treat -everyone- as you would like to be treated."
>"OK, sir, I am sure whatever Alice did, she is very sorry. Alice, apologize to the gentleman."
>Anon holds a finger up to silence everyone
>"Do not waste your breath on me for I do not forgive! Rather, apologize to the one's feelings you did hurt."
>Anon points down towards you with an open palm and looks at Alice sternly
>The man quickly speaks up
>"OK, Alice, apologize to the horse."
>"Noteworthy..."
>Anon's face contorts like a dog about to bite
"Yes, alright, apologize to Noteworthy, Alice."
>Alice, herself, looks very frustrated at everything and the three humans are kind of making you uncomfortable in their quest to solve this nonissue
>After a solid minute of awkward silence, you get your unwanted apology from Alice
>Anon's teeth show clearly through his wide, evil grin and he passes the ID tag over
>"There we are..."
>Alice almost looks like she wants to cry or maybe hit Anonymous; maybe even both!
>You and Anon move on to the checkout counter and then back to the rest of your day
"So, how far is the beach from here?"
>"About a mile or so. We're actually not going to the beach first."
"Oh? Where are we going first?"
>"My boat. You said you wanted to take a ride yesterday."
>You tap your hooves together excitedly
"You have a boat? That's so awesome! I once did an entire column on Filthy Rich, he's a mogul back home, and he took me out on his boat just for kicks. I swear, if I had discovered boats before news, my cutie mark would be sailing!"
>Anon gives a goofy smile at you
>"Good enthusiasm, Note. Save some for the actual trip or you'll be sleeping before we hit the docks."
>You giggle and lay back against the seat again
"I am all about hype, but you already knew that."
>"Get hype!"
>Anon pumps his fist into the air
"Gettin' hyped!"
>You follow the motion with your own hoof
>The two of you burst out into a fit of laughter before as the drive lingers on
>"You want to hear the radio?"
"Sure, but I don't know human music too well."
>"Don't worry, no one does..."
>You shrug and Anon presses a few buttons
>The radio comes to life with sound before Anon flips through the channels
>A tune catches him off guard and he smiles widely
>Another voice comes from the car radio and you listen in carefully
>"... I wanna wake up where you are/I won't say anything at all..."
>Anon looks to you and then back to the road as he sings along
>"And I'll do anything you ever dreamed to be complete! Little pieces of the nothing that fall~!"
>He looks back to you and you would swear his eyes have a dream-like quality to them
>"Put your arms around me! What you feel is what'cha are and what'cha are is beautiful!"
>Anon returns his gaze on the road ahead and you feel completely choked up
>The song fills your ears and you picture Anon still singing to you with that look in his eye
>"Do you wanna get married? Runaway?"
>A feeling of overpowering words and meanings makes your skin tingle and your eyes mist
>Human music seems to speak right into your very being
>It is poetic and fluid, fast and powerful, and you are left speechless when the song ends
"That... It's such a beautiful song. We don't have anything like this in Equestria..."
>"It's fairly old now, this song, I mean. I got plenty of others if you like this?"
>You're not sure if you've ever felt music like this before and you turn to Anonymous
"Hey, Anon?"
>He turns to face you and casually grins
>"What is it, Note?"
>You freeze his portrait of this moment in your head and lock it away in your memory
"Thanks..."
>He looks a little confused with you, but it was never for him to understand
>It is not more than 20 minutes that you arrive at a large marina
>Stepping out of the car, the sea air hits your nose first and you smile
>Something about the ocean always makes you feel at home
>You scope out the docks as Anon leads you up a wooden ramp
>There are at least a hundred boats or so tied up and bobbing in the water
>You have never seen boats this big in your life!
>Even Filthy's yacht looked like a dinghy next to some of docked vessels
"What a scoop! This would be a great story on human maritime fun! Maritime Merriment! No, better title, Boating Buddies: A First Hoof Account of Human Sailing!"
>Anon looks at you and laughs
>He walks around to one side where you see a large loading ramp leading into the water
>A pony with a gear and wrench cutie mark spots you two and waves you in
>"Anonymous, right on time. We got you fueled up and ready."
>The mechanic pony looks you over once and flashes his slightly yellow smile
>"And who's this lovely mare?"
>You roll your eyes, but smile nonetheless at the compliment
>"My friend, Note. She just got in from Equestria."
>You take charge and insert yourself into the conversation with a firm hoof shake
"Yep, Noteworthy! Ponyville's number one columnist. And you are?"
>"Name's Buckingham, but people around here just call me, 'Buck'. Pleasure meeting you, -Note-."
>Buck looks up to Anonymous and gives him some kind of signal with his eyes
>Anon stops for a moment and looks at the mechanic with a bit of surprise
>"What? No! Cut that out!"
>"I'm jus' saying, man! Never see you come around here with guests, is all. 'Specially -pretty- guests, hah."
>"Why is it so difficult for everyone? A man and mare could be completely platonic friends, right? Do people just assume that because two people hang out they're an item?"
>"The more you fight it, man, the stronger it gets!"
>You are half in, half out of this conversation and think it has more to do with postulating than anything else
>That's a good word, you think, for a column later
>"Just give me my keys, you nut."
>"Sure, sure, here you go."
>Anon snatches up his keys, looking angry but acting playful in some way
>"Do you still stock wine in the fridge below?"
>"Of course I do, what kind of question is that?"
>Buck lets out a big laugh, like he knows something you don't
>Anon turns a little red before leading you out
>"Damn it, Buck... walked right into that one."
>You find yourself outside again in the afternoon sun and Anon leads you to his boat
>It hardly seems real to you as you approach the massive boat
>Its sleek, white frame rests casually in the water and the sheer height of the beast almost makes you dizzy
"This is the most beautiful boat I've ever seen."
>"Thank you! I think it's nice too. Some of the people around here rag on me for buying Meridian, though."
>It almost makes sense to you when you consider how much larger some of the other boats are
>Anon holds his palm out to you and bows slightly
>"Shall we?"
>You smile and walk up the ramp until you are comfortably standing on the boat floor
>Anon tosses the ramp to one side and hoists himself up on his powerful arms
>"Alright, first mate Noteworthy. We set sail at thirteen-hundred!"
>Anon gestures to a set of narrow stairs for you to climb
>Human's make the worst staircases imaginable, but you do manage to make it to the top
>Climbing up, you see the ocean ahead of you in all its splendor and squeak in anticipation
>Anonymous follows up next and moves to a nice seat in the front by a wheel that looks not unlike the steering wheel of the car
>He sits down and motions you over
>The seat is large enough for you to sit beside him, albeit with your rump pressing up against his leg
>You hear the sound of a motor rev to life as Anon turns the key and a shiver runs down your spine
>"Is this a boat or a car?"
>"A motor boat, why?"
>So much for peaceful sailing!
>"No reason..."
>Anon shrugs to you once before you feel the vessel begin to move
>Your skilled friend navigates out of the harbor and into open water and the ride feels much nicer than a car so far
>"Alright, put these on."
>Anon hands you a pair of sunglasses and you do as instructed
>Your voice is about to ask what these are for when you feel the ship lurch forward with a new determination
>A splash of misty sea water picks up from the sides and the glasses protect your eyes from both the bright sun and the spray
>You see the ocean begin to open wider as Anon drives you both further away from the shore and, despite the speed, you find yourself smiling
>Anon speaks to you softly as he turns the boat in another direction quickly
>"Out of the line now, we'll be picking up a little speed to beat some of these rolling bumps, OK?"
"I have no idea what any of that is!"
>"Perfect!"
>Anon pushes something and presses another button and you are suddenly thrust into the soft seat cushion
>All the while your eyes feel like they are sinking into your head, Anon is smiling widely and pressing his face into the rushing wind
>"Smells delicious, no?"
>You don't bother trying to answer with how loud the wind is
>About five or so minutes pass at this break-neck speed before Anon begins to slow the boat
>Your mane feels wind whipped to one side and you look up at him with demanding eyes
"Anon... can we drive a little slower?"
>"Oh? Absolutely! Was 20 miles too much?"
"It was a little fast."
>You try to push your mane down and Anon chuckles
>"Alright, I'll take it easy. We are actually at our destination."
>You look up from the seat and over one side to see water and more water in every direction
>The city sits placidly on the horizon now, a mere spec of its former self
"Um, where is here exactly?"
>"On the ocean, of course!"
>Anon presses a few more buttons and stands up
>"We'll maintain this position as long as we'd like. Love calm weather out here. Do you want to go get changed so we can soak up some sun?"
>You nod easily as Anon begins to descend the stairs again
>It makes you feel uncomfortable that no pony is at the wheel, but you think Anon has a good reason to just leave
>Worried thought aside, you awkwardly walk back down the steps and into the lower compartment
>The first thing you notice is the beautiful interior that looks a lot like somep0ny's house
>There is a TV set in the wall and you wonder what is up with humans and television
>"Oh, there you are. I put your clothes in the bathroom. Right door around the corner."
>You trot easily over and find the bathroom without issue
>It takes a few minutes to get out of your casual clothes and into your swimsuit, but you reappear to find Anonymous just leaving his bathroom
>His green shorts hug his legs nicely and the bulge at the front distracts you slightly
>He adjusts his shorts a bit lower before pulling the drawstrings together
>"Nothing but net, heh!"
>You don't get it, but smile as if
>Anon stops for a moment as he looks you over and you get a feeling you should pose a bit
>You stretch out your back leg and turn slightly ahead of him while strutting a bit harder than usual
>With a sultry smile, you crane your head over your shoulder
"What do you think about this -little- number, hmm?"
>"You look... ahem, you look nice. Yeah, real good choice."
>He runs a hand behind his head and looks upward
"You really think so? Kind of feels tight right here..."
>You use your magic to yank up the center around your crotch before adjusting it back in place
>"Oh, wow... I mean, no, yeah! You look great! How about that sun?"
>This is fun to tease Anon, you think
>You level your head as your own lewd thoughts start interfering and you slowly walk out ahead of Anon
>His feet make a soft step and you try to emulate it, but hooves on hardwood floors aren't the easiest thing to mask
>You step outside into the sunlight to find the boat is still in place
>You had half expected to be drifting towards nowhere by now, but Anon has never steered you wrong before!
>Anon goes to a counter you had not noticed and pulls out a small can of Coke and two bottles of water
>"Thirsty?"
>Even if you weren't, there is no way you could pass up a Coke
>Anon's fingers curl into the can lid before popping it open and he holds it out to you
>You wrap your magic around the can and lift it to your mouth
>The chilly drink makes your head swim with sugary delight as you gulp it down quickly
>"You really like that stuff, huh?"
>No words now, only Coke
>He sits at the back of the boat and displays his body to the sunshine and yourself
>His broad shoulders and strong arms look so inviting and you get the strangest idea of pouring Coke down his chest and licking it off
>With a frightful snap, you push that thought off the side of the boat and chuckle to yourself
>Surely, Anon would not appreciate doing that... unless he does...
>You shake your head harder as you try to clear these relentless thoughts
>"Hey, Note?"
>Your head flips up to look at him as if he caught you with your hoof in the cookie jar
>"Wanna take a load off?"
>He pats the seat beside him and you sigh with relief
>You step lightly to him and sit as vertically as you can
>"This is pretty nice today, yeah? It's like 80 degrees, but with the wind, it's just perfect!"
"Oh yes, it's great. I can't believe how big everything is here."
>"Hey, question for you. Can I ever go to Equestria?"
"I... I don't know. I don't think I've seen any humans in Ponyville ever. We sometimes get human goods and I know we ship a lot of pony goods, but I don't know if humans actually like coming to Equestria."
>"Why wouldn't we like it?"
"I don't know, maybe you just wouldn't? It's pretty and all, but so much different than Earth."
>Anon looks to you for further explaination
"Well, for one thing, you have a TV in almost every room and on this boat. I don't even own a TV! There is no MT stations anywhere near my house."
>"What's MT?"
"Magic Transmission. It's how you broadcast signals from each resonating tower. Wait, how do humans do it?"
>"We broadcast using radio waves or, in some cases digital ones, and then an antenna picks up that signal and goes through an extremely convoluted process to make a picture."
"So... no magic, right?"
>"Right, we humans don't have magic. We usually end up relying on some type of science. Since unicorns have been introduced to society, far as I have seen, magic is becoming an interesting topic in scientific circles."
"Oh, so like... my horn, right?"
>"Yes, but I don't think we should talk about this. It's not good vacation chatter."
"Why not?"
>"Because everything after this sentence would be extremely grim for you."
"But, not you?"
>"Not at all! Humans are hilariously easy-going about death and dismemberment."
>The words sink in quite deeply and you can barely find the words to express your surprise
"You what?"
>Anon sighs and looks at you with his big, caring eyes
>"If you really want to know... A pony council on Earth allowed human scientists to study the remains of a few unicorns who willingly donated their bodies to science. Willingly, mind you."
"What... did they do?"
>"Far as I know? Usual dissection, added a few pages to some bestiary about equine subspecies. They attempted to use the horn of said unicorns to recreate the magical effects it had, but it seems only the horn's owner can do anything with it."
"Wow... Is that normal?"
>"For humans? Absolutely. There was a big stink in Washington -after- all this happened. Apparently, somebody forgot to check on the funeral rituals of Equestria and they got an angry letter from your Princess."
"Oh gosh, Celestia herself sent a letter? What happened?"
>"Strained some relationship points with the Princess, but nothing really major. Humanity was ordered to stop further experimentation on Equestrians and I think that is for the better."
>You stop for a moment and look up at Anon
"You're right... this is bad vacation talk."
>He smiles and runs his hand down your mane
>"No worries, I would never try to experiment on you. I'm just not that kind of guy. Though, your horn is pretty cool."
>Without you noticing, Anon's hand slides around your horn and he drags his fingers down bump in the spiral
>The feeling runs straight to your brain and makes your tongue tingle before you finally moan and pull back
>Anon looks at you for a minute and then to his hand
>"Oh... I am... sorry?"
>You breathe deeply and try to get your tongue working properly again
"I-It's... don't worry..."
>Your face feels extra hot in the sun and you stand to your hooves to walk over to a shady area
>"I didn't know! Honest!"
>You would be more angry if you didn't wish he'd do it again
>Anon stands up and walks over to you carefully
>"I am sorry, I didn't know it was... sensitive. I thought it was a bone?"
"It's Ok, it's fine! Just... I need some water."
>He quickly retrieves a bottle and brings it back to you
>You take it without much consideration and begin to guzzle it
>Anything to take your mind off the feeling of his warm hands on your horn is a welcome relief
>Anon looks at you with a bit more intensity than normally and you stare back
"What? What's the matter?"
>"Nothing, sorry! I didn't mean to stare."
>Stupid, sexy Anon!
>You pull yourself together and sigh easily before going back to sitting on the bench
>Anon approaches you with another Coke in hand and smiles weakly
>"Hey, you... Soda?"
>You take it happily and smile to your confused friend
"I am sorry for acting so rude. Just be careful next time, OK?"
>"Yes, of course! I had no idea unicorn horns were sensitive."
"Now you do."
>You can't help but stare at Anon's fingers as you drink your Coke
>They glimmer in the fading sun with little beads of sweat from the cold can clinging to them and you get a strange urge to put them in your mouth
>A sound can be heard just behind you as something big hits the water
>You turn quickly to see something moving past the boat
>"Oh, neat, whales."
>You stand up on the seat to peer over into the ocean as a parade of black humps rise and fall
"Whales?"
>"Yes, do you have them in Equestria?"
"Yes, but... they look much happier there."
>"Don't tell me you are some whale-whisperer too?"
"No, no, I mean... they are brighter and kind of colorful. Like pink or blue and lots of colors like that."
>"Huh, weird."
>You admire the large animals for a while as they pass by
>It is odd that they don't stop to say, "Hello" or anything, but maybe they are just too busy
>The sun begins to set on another excellent day and you lose count of how many hours you must have been out in the blue
"Are we going back to your home for dinner?"
>"We can if you want."
"What else can we do?"
>"Sleepover on the boat?"
"Oh, can you do that?"
>Anon shrugs and smiles with a silly grin
>"Hasn't stop me before! We just need to move a bit closer to shore first."
>With that, Anon climbs to the top of the boat and you hear the engines come to life
>You look over the edge to see that they are hidden well in the water and it kind of makes you smile
>Without warning, the boat moves and you quickly slide onto the floor for balance
>Anon promised he wouldn't go so fast, but there is still no practical reason to look at the blurring scenery
>You shriek, in a journalistic way, as Anon turns the boat quickly and bounces from wave to wave
>It doesn't take long until you reach where ever it is that Anon is going and the engines shut off
>You look up to see the city has grown much bigger again and the sun gleams brilliantly off the glass buildings as it sinks into the water
>Anon emerges from over the upper deck and calls out to you
>"Just make yourself comfortable! I'll be down in a few!"
>You look up and nod to him before heading back inside
>The inside of the boat is just as wide as you remember and you check on the kitchen to see what snacks may be hiding
>Rummaging through the drawers finds you a few cookies and you munch them down
>Anon appears as you swallow your treat and smiles at you
>"Hungry, yeah?"
"Oh, yeah. What do you want for dinner?"
>"Ah, ah, I will be making this meal. What can I get for -you-?"
>You place your hoof to your face and think hard for the moment
"How about... hmm, hay fries and a garden salad?"
>Anon squints at you as if trying to read some fine print
>"Hay... fries?"
"Oh, guess you don't have those... um, tomato soup?"
>"Yes, now you're making sense."
>Anon steps around you and opens up the upper cabinets
>He pulls out a red and white can and looks it over before grabbing a second
>"You know, I have not asked and this may be important. Do you eat meat?"
>Your eyes cross a bit as you think about it
"No, never. Why?"
>"Just checking. Have you ever had it?"
"Nope, never. I have heard humans it eat thought. Are you... are you hungry for something like that?"
>"Not really, I have been working on cutting back so I didn't offend you."
"Oh, it wouldn't bother me. I mean... it's just meat, right?"
>"It is odd, the other few ponies I do know are rather skeptical of it. Though I know one guy who can't live without pepperoni anymore."
"What is that?"
>"A type of slightly spicy sausage. It is usually found on pizza or used in a sandwich. The pony friend of mine, Watts, had it with me when I ordered a pie without thinking about it."
>You consider this for a while as Anon prepares the stove top
>"Hey, you want grilled cheese with this?"
"Grilled cheese with soup?"
>"Yeah! They go together like... like peanut butter and jelly!"
"Wait, soup and PB and J?"
>"No, no, soup and grilled cheese!"
"Oh, OK, if you say so."
>You are a little distracted with the pepperoni thing still as Anon begins piling ingredients on a counter
>He dumps the soup into a pot and begins slicing cheese on to a plate
>Anon is exceptional with a knife, you think
"Hey, Anonymous?"
>"Hmm? What's up?"
"What's it taste like?"
>"Tomato soup?"
"No, meat? What does it taste like?"
>"Like meat, I guess? I don't know, there is a lot of different meat and even then, there are lots of different seasonings to make it taste like something else."
>Curiosity begins to take hold of your mind and your journalistic nature pokes into your relaxation time again
>Clearly, meat is edible and humans really like it, it would be wrong to visit some other country or world and not sample their food!
"Do you have any here I could try?"
>Anon looks up from his work and stares at you in an odd way
>"Sure, if you want too..."
>He opens the refrigerator behind him and fumbles around for something
>A white package flips from over his head and lands on the counter with a great, wet thud and Anon shuts the fridge
>"OK, here is what I have now. It is called, 'smoked turkey breast'."
"Anon, I know what a turkey is..."
>"Oh, excellent, wasn't sure."
>You had no idea you could eat turkeys, but this world is different after all
>Anon gingerly unwraps the package and you stare at the contents
>Perfect disks lay stacked on each other in a neat cylinder shape of white meat in the center and it almost makes you laugh at how much it does not look like any turkey you've encountered
>"Don't stress yourself about it though. I understand it would be an acquired taste at best."
>You watch Anon pick up a single disk, fold it in half and then put it in his mouth
>His sharp front teeth easily rip into the white flesh and he smiles lightly
"That good, huh?"
>"For humans, yeah. We do need a certain level of protein to maintain a healthy body. I guess we could eat nuts and beans, but, well, meat is just tasty stuff!"
>He quickly snacks on another piece before realizing how intensely you are watching him
"It would be... rude? Yes, rude to not try it."
>Anon shrugs and passes you the pile
>You lift a piece carefully in your magic and examine it
>You fold it like Anon did and sniff it once to find the scent of wood and spices drift up your nose
>Summoning all the courage of a columnist, you close your eyes and rip a bit off with your teeth
>It is cold on your tongue, but slightly moist and full of flavors you are unsure off
>You open one eye to see Anon staring at you with a concerned look
>A small laugh erupts from you as you swallow the odd meal and nod your head
"Hah, that's pretty good!"
>"You think so?"
>You pop the remainder in your mouth and chew quickly to ease Anon's fears
>"Well, help yourself to as much as you like."
>Anon leaves the package to you and returns to cooking
>It does not take long for the soup to be ready and Anon crafts two of the most beautiful grilled cheese sandwiches you've ever seen
>Meanwhile, you have eaten about seven disks of meat in the most journalistic way possible
>There is a certain something to meat that you find delicious, despite all other factors pointing to how gross it should feel
>"I see you are really enjoying that stuff. Main course is ready when you are!"
>You casually push the turkey to one side and find your seat at the small table
>Anon lays a bowl of rich tomato soup and plate of grilled cheese before you and you smile warmly
"Looks amazing, Anon!"
>"Thanks, I do try."
>Anon places two wine glasses on the table and nudges a pail of ice to one side
>"Do you drink wine?"
"What kind of question is that?"
>You scowl at Anon who should know better
"Of course I do! I even sent you a copy of my, 'Wine of the Month' membership card!"
>With a playful grin, you take the bottle in your magic and pop the cork
>Anon looks back at you and seems surprised
>"Hell of a magic trick... I need to use the screw myself!"
>You sniff at the bottle and take in the aroma
"Hmm, vintage stuff... yeah... Pinot Noir, definitely... I am thinking like... 1998."
>You take a swig straight from the bottle and Anon looks at you with an interesting smirk
>"You are excellent with your wines, Note. I've never met anyone so talent on a sniff alone."
>You lid your eyes at him and hold the bottle label forward
"I'm an excellent reader too, darling."
>A chuckle escapes you as Anon catches on and, before too long, laughs along
>"God, you're a peach."
>You pour Anon and yourself a glass before putting the bottle back in the ice
"Hehe, you're just saying that."
>"No, really, I've had so much fun these past two days. You're better than the letters ever stated."
"I feel the same way about you."
>Anon holds up his cup to you and smiles
>"A toast to good friends!"
"A toast!"
>You hold up your grilled cheese triangle and giggle
>He replaces his wine glass with his own half of sandwich and you tap the edges together while making a clank sound with your mouths
>Laughter fills the cabin as you withdraw and stare over the table
>Anon looks so nice in the lighting, you think and you sigh happily
>You begin eating and drinking as you speak freely of some of your adventures
>Your friend listens well and even asks questions now and then
>It must be an hour that you sit and talk and the only thing to stop you is when your find the bottle of wine is empty
>"Ah, that was a filling meal after all."
>You slump back in your seat and sigh just to make enough room in your stomach to breathe again
>You are feeling great or even better than great, you think!
>Anon stands up first and begins cleaning the table
>His shapely bum teases you a bit with his swaying and you could swear he's doing that on purpose
>"If you want to, you can take a shower first. Pump's not strong enough for two showers to be running."
>You smirk a little and you feel extra giggling
"Well, why don't we... we should save water, yeah?"
>A little giggle escapes you as you sway towards Anon
"Yeah, lets save water... take a bath with me."
>Anon looks down at you as you wrap around his leg
>"Note, are you drunk?"
"What? Pfft, no! I can handle my alcohol... I'm a big mare!"
>You drool a little between your smile and assure yourself that you are not drunk
>"Note, you got a little something... right there."
>Anon wipes the spittle from the side of your cheek and you take the opportunity to catch his hand in your mouth
>His fingers slip into your muzzle and you suck at them lightly
>He tastes as good as he smells and you bubble a bit
>"Note, I think you need to lie down."
"You're right... lets lay down on the couch tonight."
>"You never told me you were such a bad drinker..."
>Anon smirks at you and wipes his fingers on his shorts
"I have no problem drinking... it all goes right down, ha ha ha."
>The world tilts a little and you turn your head to make it even again
"Hey, Anon... I want to tell you a secret... come 'mere."
>You wave him over and he ducks lower
"Closer, it's a secret."
>"No one else is here to hear you..."
"Shh, shh, secret, come closer."
>He sighs and gets down to his knees
>Anon is about your height like this and you whisper in his ear
"Your butt's really cute in those shorts~"
>Another giggle pops from your mouth and you take Anon's strong jaw in your hooves
>A simple tug tilts his head up and you give him a nice kiss
>His breath is hot and he kind of tastes like soup still, but that's just half the fun of it!
>Anon suddenly pushes your shoulders back and holds you kind of roughly
>By Celestia, his hands feel warm!
"You come here often? Hehe."
>"Jeez, can't let you drink anymore..."
"What? I'm fine! Really... my skin feels a little hot though. Why don't you help me get out of this awful thing, yeah?"
>"You are wearing next to nothing, Note."
"I know... come on, Anon, help me take it off."
>Anon's eyes roll before he slips his hand down to your chest
>You let out a soft chuckle as he slips his fingers into your silky top and slowly works it up your body
>A little struggling helps you keep his hands on your body for that much longer, but he eventually wins and removes the top half
"Ah~! Thanks, Anon... I'm feeling better already. How about we get rid of the bottom next, hmm?"
>He doesn't express how much fun you know he's having, so you grin for him
>His fingers slip into the small bands that hold the bathing suit to your sides and you let out a moan
>The feeling of Anon's warm hands gliding down your thighs feels so incredible that you nearly moan a second time
>The silky bikini pulls and stretches around your butt and slightly slick mare parts, getting a bit damp in the process
>"Note, I think we should get you cleaned up and sleep off that wine."
>Anon carefully holds your clothing to one side between two fingers
"I think... you know what I think? I'll tell you what I think! You've got a nice butt..."
>You lightly grope Anon in his accessible position
>"Note... Noteworthy, this doesn't feel right."
"Oh, sorry, never did this to a human before. Should I go in circles or...?"
>"Not that! You're drunk, this isn't the Note I know."
"What? I'm still Noteworthy! I am -not- drunk... I'm just... just... OK, I'm a little tipsy."
>"A little?"
>Anon gives you a sexy, stern look and you reflect on your actions thus far
>You aren't really doing anything wrong, you imagine
>It's Anon's fault for wearing those shorts anyways!
>One more squeeze of his strong backside and you release him
"I am fine and it's fine if you don't think I'm fine because everything is fine."
>You cross your hooves over your chest and turn your nose up at Anon
>"I won't lie, you're cute when your stupid like this."
>You turn a single eye to him and smirk before letting your hooves down
"You're cute when you're playing hard to get."
>"Come on, lets get you cleaned up."
"Alright... Hey! You know what would be great?"
>Anon looks to you with an interested grin
"If you helped me get a first-hoof account of how big a human di-"
>You trip over the step-up and fall over yourself with a thump
>"Serves you right for being a terrible drunk..."
>Anon lifts you to your hooves and you grimace
"I'm not drunk! My equilib-erem is off! And I'm drooling because I'm tired! And I'm so horny because I'm... Oh, forget it, I'm drunk."
>"The first step on the road to recovery is admitting you have a problem."
"What's the second step?"
>"Getting off the sauce."
"Pfft, as if! That stuff's good!"
>It takes a little while, but you do manage to shower and Anon even helps you with -most- of those hard to reach places
>He does leave his swimming clothes on the whole time and you think it's unsporting of him, but it is for the best or so he says
>You bundle up in a few towers as you dry off and Anon vanishes
>He returns quickly enough smelling like soap and wearing a pair of pajama pants, but no shirt
>It's nice to see he gave you that much in the end!
>"How're you feeling?"
"Like a mare trapped in a stall all winter."
>"I'll take that as an OK then?"
"Eh..."
>You remove the towels and flop yourself onto the bedding
>It's really soft and you snuggle against a pillow
>A solid, warm body suddenly slides along your back and you look over with a little surprise
>"You're a good friend, Note. I don't want to do anything we'll question later."
>You roll yourself over and wrap your hooves around his body
>His face points down towards you and you get lost in his shining eyes
"You dummy... pressing your body this close to me when you know I'm not feeling so good."
>"You know, Note, I think I might love you..."
>As if somep0ny poured a bucket of ice water over your head, you snap into reality
>Your heart thumps harder in your chest and you pant lightly against Anon's chest
"Y-you lo-"
>Anon's finger seals your lips and his gaze pierces your soul
>"Don't let it go to your head."
>His hand holds your face as if it were made for you and your muzzle angles upward to meet Anon's beautiful lips
>This kiss tastes much more minty than before, but that's just half the fun, you think
>You break the kiss first to look at your beautiful friend and wonder why fate has kept you apart for so long
"You better be here in the morning..."
>Your eyes close and you let Anon's body cool you
"... If this turns out to be a wet dream, I'll be so mad..."
>As Anon's arms hold you close to him, you nearly melt
>Your eye sees out the window into the sky and the moon is shining brightly over you tonight
>It may be the alcohol talking, but you swear you see Princess Luna's shadow on the moon
>Couldn't be, you think, you just need some rest after so much excitement
>You snuggle in closer and deflate your chest in the most content of contented sighs
>No more petals to pick, you think as you feel Anon's arms hold you tightly
>He loves me...

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

>Day Bright and Early on Earth
>Be Noteworthy
>You awake with a terrible headache to a golden sun shining through open blinds
>The spacious bed under you feels soft, if a little empty
>Anon's scent covers your body and blankets and you just know he was here last night
>You roll from the center until you feel the edge and slip off on to the carpeting
>A smell of food lifts through the air as you enter the bathroom
>You tidy up and try to rinse the taste of finely aged wine from your tongue
>Human oral care products, like toothpaste and mouthwash, should usually be avoided by ponies, so you just gargle some warm water
>It feels just refreshing enough and you decide this is as good as it gets!
>You stumble from the bedroom and into the kitchen to find Anon wearing a very silly hat and apron that reads, "Kiss the Cook."
>"Morning, you. How'd you sleep?"
"Like a foal!"
>"Great to hear, breakfast?"
>You look up to Anon and feel a little queasy
"No... Thank you."
>You hold a hoof to your head and sit at the table
>"Ah, hangover. I got a magic trick for that..."
>You look at Anon strangely
>What magic trick can he have when he doesn't even have a horn?
>Anon quickly grabs a piece of toast and butters it generously
>He adds a shot of some red sauce and a pinch of pepper
>"Here, eat this."
"How will this help?"
>"Would you just trust me on this?"
"What's the red stuff?"
>"Tabasco sauce, give it a bite."
>You shrug, giving in to Anon, and take a bite
>It takes a whole second to realize how horrible this idea was and your mouth burns out of control
>Here you thought Anon was your friend!
>"That should help take some edge off."
>He hands you a glass of water next and you quickly guzzle it down
>Your tongue stings a little longer, but it has helped you ignored the pain in your head
>Anon hands you another glass of water and you sip at it
>"Hot sauce and butter, I swear by it. If you want to, you can go back to bed. That'll help you recover a little faster."
>As if you would want to waste a glorious vacation sleeping!
"No, no, I'll be fine in a little."
>Anon just chuckles before laying some traditional pancakes on a plate
>He covers them in a gooey syrup and you feel your mouth getting wet
>A dab of yellow butter neatly lays on top of the small stack and you swallow hard as you watch him lay the plate in front of you
>"So, no more wine for you, right?"
>You barely register what Anon says as he takes a forkful of sloppy, drippy pancakes and chews through it
"E-excuse me..."
>You race from the table and to the outer deck of the boat
>With just seconds to spare, you lean over one side and lose the better half of your stomach
>Anon is fairly quick to react and is at your side in moments
>"Feeding the fish, I see."
>He wears a big, stupid grin as he rubs your shoulders
>Your throat and face hurt and you are absolutely in no mood for joking
>"Come on, you, lets get you in bed."
>Anon wipes your mouth with a napkin before lifting you in his strong arms
>You look at him with heavy eyes as you lay your neck on his shoulder
>The inside of the cabin is cooler than outside and the bed sheets feel nice on your body again
>Anon draws in the blinds and the room becomes comfortably dark
>You fall asleep shortly after
>It is about an hour or so later that you feel a human hand prodding into your flank and pushing at your shoulder
>You open your eyes to see the handsome Anonymous staring back at you
>"Hey, Note, we're back at the dock. How are you feeling?"
>A stretch and yawn escape you
"Not so bad, actually. A little hungry."
>Anon nods his head to you a few times before you stand up
>You wobble off the bed, still feeling a little woozy, and lightly step behind Anon
"So, what adventures do we have planned today?"
>A smile parts your features
>"To be honest? I ran out of things to do already. I'm so bad at planning... How about the zo-."
>Anon cuts himself off quickly and looks at you a little strangely
"What? Is there something in my teeth?"
>You smack your lips together and run your tongue along your pearly whites
>"No, no, it's nothing... How about the museum?"
"Museum? I am not sure, never had to do a story on a museum."
>"For vacation, I mean."
"I know, but I usually base my good times on where the action happens."
>A smile creeps slowly over Anon's face until it curls around his cheeks
>"I know a great place for -action-."
>Anon lets go a short, but truly diabolic laugh
>You just smile and begin walking
"OK, sounds fun!"
>"Wait, don't you want to know what I am laughing about?"
"Nope! I am sure we'll just end up doing whatever is you have in mind. I like your ideas, usually."
>You strut up to Anon's leg and rub your face against him quickly
>"Well, thanks, I think?"
>The hug lasts long enough for you to both enjoy Anon's warmth and balance yourself
>Hugs are great like that!
>Anon cleans up a little while as you begin to make your way above deck and back on solid ground
>The gentle swaying of the ocean leaves you soon enough and your wine buzz plays softly in your nose
>"Oh, you two back already? How was your trip?"
>You turn to the voice speaking to find the mechanic known as Buck
"It was great! Would have easily made for a great column."
>You nod sagely at your words
>"Heh, in which mag..."
>Buck smiles widely and turns his head as if trying to avoid you answering
>Anon steps off the boat and looks sternly across to Buck and yourself
>"Would you -kindly- stop harassing my guests?"
>Buck chuckles before nodding to Anon
>"Sure, sure! So, how's she riding?"
>"I thought we agreed no more innuendo?"
>Buck looks a little confused as a smile breaks over his muzzle
>"The boat, bro..."
>Anon blushes with a slightly frustrated grin
>"Excellently... I would definitely like the hull cleaned though."
>"Aye-aye!"
>Buck begins to call out a crew of some other humans and a few ponies as you walk away
>You think it would be interesting to interview a pony who works in the human world, but you push the thought aside
>Anon produces his car keys from some pocket and presses a button
>You see the car light up and hear a beeping sound
>Sometimes, you can't distinguish human technology from unicorn magic
>"So, ready for a little trip?"
"You know it! I love your boat, but I think being in a small space for so long has me anxious to get out."
>Anon smirks and opens your door
>"That is good to hear. I think you'll like where we're going."
>You hop up into your seat and buckle up as per procedure
>Anon gets in and starts the car
>The engine rumbles and you cringe at the loud sound, but Anon seems to smile at the sound
>"I love how this engine purrs."
"Like a manticore?"
>"A what?"
"You know, a manticore? Big head, bat wings, scorpion tail, super extra loud?"
>"I... I really don't. Do you get a lot of them?"
"No, but hearing it once is more than enough."
>Anon presses on the peddle and the engines roars again
>"I bet."
>You feel the car move as Anon begins to drive to where ever it is he has deemed exciting
"Oh, hey! Can we listen to music?"
>"Sure thing, what would you like to hear?"
"Um, anything?"
>Anon presses a few buttons and you hear the sound of the radio pick up
>"This is DJ Baha in the morning, bringing you all the latest and greatest hits only on The Wire! Stay tuned for another 53 minute music block hour!"
>You think of 53 minutes of human music and it makes you smile
>Writing a column about human music would probably get you any number of awards, you think
>You pause for the moment as the song begins
>"I remember when we broke up the first time. Saying this is it, I've had enough, 'cause like..."
>This time the song is a woman singing and you like her enough as you listen
>Anon looks like he is in mild pain and you look to him curiously
>"This chick again..."
"Hmm? You know her?"
>"Taylor Swift, the queen of breakups."
>You let the thought rattle around as you listen to the song a bit more
>Apparently, this Taylor Swift is never -ever- getting back together with the other person in the song
>You wonder if humans find it easier to breakup through song as you think a few pony musicians have done the same in the past
"Well, it was a good song, I think. I mean, the message was good. I don't think that stallion will be bothering her anymore."
>Anon looks at you with sharp eyes that slowly soften and he laughs
>"Note, you're so great sometimes."
"What does -that- mean?"
>"The way you analyze things, it's almost refreshing."
>You slump in your seat as you try to figure out if Anon is complimenting you or not
>A tune starts playing on the radio and Anon smiles easily
>"You might like this song."
>Your ears ping to and fro as you prepare to soak in more human music
>A happy female voice comes out boldly with the rhythm
>"I used to think maybe you loved me, now baby, I'm sure! And I just can't wait 'til the day when you knock on the door!"
>The beat is so infectious that you find yourself humming along already
>Anon doesn't sing along with this song, but he does mouth the words
>"I'm walking on sunshine! Whoa~!"
>You hear a popping, slight snapping noise coming from Anon and you block the music momentarily
>His fingers are sliding past each other in time with the music, causing some kind of snapping sound
>It becomes hard to not watch his hands now as the motion seems to transfix you
>The first thing you remember when you saw Anonymous' picture, aside from his strange face and weird posture, was his hands
>Human hands are amazing because every human you've seen has at least two and they can do all sorts of things
>A thought crosses your mind as to why humans don't have hooves, but the music drowns you out
>"I'm on sunshine, baby, oh, oh yeah! I'm on sunshine baby, oh~!"
>The music fades out slowly and your whole body feels energized
>"So, how'd you like that one?"
"That singer sounds like she's in way over her head in love. Aren't these conflicting songs though?"
>"What do you mean?"
"What if the person that human loves heard the other song and thought that was for them?"
>Anon snorts a little and looks to you casually
>"These songs are not broadcasted in real time, Note. Is that how they do it in Equestria?"
"Well, sometimes, yeah. Radio doesn't spread too far and Ponyville is kind of small. We get a lot of live performances! Though, I suppose most of those are Canterlot or Manehattan musicians doing tours."
>"Hmm, interesting, but there is no need to fret about that. The song you just heard, the one called, 'Walking On Sunshine' is probably thirty-something years old now."
"Wow... That sounds really good for a thirty year old record."
>You nod a few times with your hoof on your chin
>"I... when we get home, I've got some things to show you."
"What kind of things?"
>You bounce your eyebrows at him in a suggestive, yet silly manner
>"Yeah, sure, we'll look at -that- too."
>He smiles in kind to your own silliness
>The drive continues on in this way and you get to hear a good chunk of human music
>You also learn that you need to control Anon's hand because he keeps flipping through radio stations like the console is on fire
>"That song's boring, Note. Lets find something fun!"
"I never heard it! Stop hogging the music!"
>You swat Anon's hand a few more times over the course of the drive until he gives in
>It's hard to learn about human things when Anon is trying to gloss over what is "boring"
>"You have the worst car etiquette I have ever seen. Don't you know that the driver is the one in charge of the radio?"
>Anon smirks as if he is triumphant
"Those rules shouldn't apply to me. Unless you want to teach me how to drive?"
>You smile wider at him with your most journalistic grin
>"Fine, I'll leave it alone. Just ten more minutes anyways."
>He snorts in a very pony-like manner and it makes you giggle
"How about this; I'll let you wildly flip through stations on the ride home?"
>Anon looks over to you with a sideways glare before dipping his face
>"You're going to make this a difficult ride, you are..."
>His usual smile returns to his face as he looks out onto the road
>The trip ends with only two more songs of varying degrees of interest passing
>You just can't get the tune of, "Walking On Sunshine" out of your head, however
>It is extremely catchy, you think as Anon parks
>The engine dies with a flick of a key and your friend springs from the car with a good bit of enthusiasm
>You follow suit and stare across the space you can see between the cars
>There are certainly a bunch of cars parked here and you wonder if this is some kind of lot for which to park in?
>They could certainly use a name for something like that!
>"We have arrived, my dear Noteworthy!"
"Huzzah!"
>You beam up to Anon before cocking your head to one side
"Where are we?"
>"This is one of my favourite theme parks; Great Adventures!"
>From the sound of it, you imagine that there are some grand exploits to be had
"So... how does it work? Are we suppose to run through the cars? Is it a maze?"
>"What? Oh, wait... Hehe, I forget how tall everything is sometimes. Come here..."
>You do as Anon commands, not really sure what his intentions are
>He wraps an arm under your body and lifts you off your hooves with his strong body
>The fleeting feeling of absolute bliss of being in Anon's arms subsides as your eyes behold a glorious rollercoaster park in the distance
>Structures reaching the sky dot the horizon and you are certain you hear the screams of happy ponies on the wind
"Oh my gosh! A rollercoaster! I love rollercoasters! Oh, and Coke! Do they have Coke?!"
>"On every corner..."
"Pinch me, I must be dreaming..."
>You feel a slight poke at your side and Anon chuckles
>"Glad to see you this excited. Lets walk to the ticket booth."
>Anon is about to place you down when you stop him
"Wait!"
>The sunshine in the background and being that close to Anon's beautiful face makes for an excellent snapshot
>"What's the matter?"
>You stare at Anon from this angle and lock the image away in your head
"There we go..."
>After getting the perfect picture, you hop down and walk alongside your amazing friend
"I can't believe you remembered that. It's so awesome! -You- are so awesome~!"
>You squeeze your face as you speak out of sheer excitement
>"Slow down, you. You're going to burn up your fun-matrix before you even get started!"
>As you head towards the ticket booth, you notice a lot of ponies are standing around outside
>Anon stops in his tracks and scowls quickly
>"Ah, bullshit!"
>He points to a larger, blue car that has the number six draw in red on the side and you notice some humans standing near it
>They seem to be wearing nicer clothing, like Anonymous, and carry some kind of video equipment
>It is not unlike equipment you have seen used for television news stories, albeit, much more sophisticated
>"We might not be coming here today..."
>Anon's voice barely registers in your head as you grow exceptionally curious
>You quickly make your way to the crowd of ponies with Anon in tow
>The first oddity, or possibly normal thing, you notice is that everyp0ny is au naturel
>A tall pony with a sign in his hoof calls out to you
>"Sister! Join us and help put an end to, like, this oppression!"
>Anon sighs loudly while muttering some slander
"Sister? Oppression? I'm gonna need some explanations here!"
>"My name's Autumn Wind..."
>A slightly shorter, slighter pudgier pony butts into the conversation quickly
>"I thought it was, 'Jerry'?"
>"That's my -human- name! The oppressive human regiment ends today! We are starting by picketing in front of this place!"
"May I ask why, sir?"
>You quickly pull out a pad and look for your quill
"Anon, you see a red feather laying around?"
>"Eh, not really... what's it for?"
"So I can take some notes..."
>"Do you want... a pen?"
"A what?"
>Anon reaches in his pocket and produces a small, black stick with a sharp tip
>You take it in your magic and size is up
>A few scratches on your notepad reveal that it does indeed write and you smile
"Now, Mr. Wind, please describe in your own words what your, 'plight' is with this establishment?"
>"Are you with Channel 99?"
"No, I am with the Ponyville Times. Number two paper in all of Equestria, but number one in hard hitting journalism!"
>Autumn Wind looks to the chubby pony and than another mare
>"Well, I suppose -you- can understand our cause, even if you can't, like, spread the word... Humans are horrible creatures who have plenty of land and food, yet don't believe that ponies should, like, share in the bounty."
"Alright, and this makes you feel slighted?"
>"That's an understatement! Ponies on Earth are treated with little to no respect and are constantly being, like, punished for being a pony! We're just as deserving as any human!"
>The herd around Autumn cheers and they stomp their hooves in celebration to his words
>The older mare steps up to you next and smiles a well-traveled smile
>"My name is Shimmering Moonbeams and my life partner, Autumn Wind, is trying to get humans to see that we ponies deserve to share in the wealth of Earth as much as we wish to share in Equestria. It's a perfect representation of harmony and our chi is brilliant and clear for all to see."
>You write down as much of this as you can clearly spell
>This "pen" thing is so smooth on the paper, you think, and it makes your writing extra tidy
"Alright, got it! So, what exactly has -this- place, this theme park, done to you?"
>The mare bows her head and walks backwards as Autumn Wind steps up
>"This so called, 'Great' Adventure theme park is, like, totally not! In fact, we've never even been inside before!"
>Anon starts laughing from the side lines
>"Why not? Afraid of heights?"
>His eyes bounce and his trademark grin that seems to irk the skin from under other humans plays sharply on his face
>"No! I love heights! Thing is, you need to have an accompanying -human- to let you in! That's, like, speciest or something!"
>The herd of ponies stamps their hooves in a defiant cheer
>Anon shrugs quickly
>"I had no idea, did they give you a good reason?"
>You've never seen Anon act journalistically before
>He's kind of sexy, or sexier, when he's interrogating somep0ny!
>You clutch your notepad closer to you as you blush
>"Some obvious lie about, like, safety and junk. Humans are always lying to us ponies!"
>Moonbeam steps up again and looks to Anon with a strong glare
>"It's obviously as safe for ponies as it is for humans, but the humans won't give us a chance. It's really messing up our zen and muddling our positive energy!"
>You continue writing before Anon asks his next question
>"Well, have you tried talking to the owner to lay your case?"
>Both Moonbeam and Autumn Wind look up at each other quickly and their eyes go wide
>Autumn is the first to respond as he prods the ground with a bashful hoof
>"Well, like... we were going to... but, uh, we ran a little suggesting box and, like, picketing came up to be the most favorable idea."
>Anon clutches his sides as if he was afraid to lose them and he belts out a nasty laugh
>"You fuckin' hippies! No matter which species you come from! I swear, you are all hopeless!"
>The herd looks angrily at Anon and you calm him down
"What my -assistant- here is trying to say is; if you make your peace with the proper authorities, you may just get to come in and enjoy the rides."
>A female human with a microphone and another human male with a camera come rushing to your group as the dust settles
>"Reporter Garcia, nice to meet you. We'd just like to get a few questions if you..."
>Anon quickly puts himself between you and the other humans
>"Nothin' to see here! Just a peaceful protest that's already going home!"
>"Sir, we will get to you in a moment, we want a word with that pony there."
>The human reporter points to you, but you know better!
"Look, miss, I already got the story and I'm not selling! Noteworthy, ace columnist, is already on this one."
>You smile as you wag the pen to and fro
>"What? You're a reporter? Stop rolling..."
>The camera beeps before the man takes it from his shoulder
>Reporter Garcia looks extremely upset
>"This was -my- story! Which agency are you with?"
>Anon jumps in before you can speak
>"We're with the Department of Get Bent. Now, kindly move along, you're too slow on this one."
>Anon smiles and says something you are sure is not very nice
>"Pack it up, Mark... I'm sure we'll get a good riot soon enough."
>With that, the two disappear into their large vehicle and drive away
>Your blood is racing from all this excitement and your notepad smells deliciously of ink and news
>You make a memo to yourself to keep this magic writing tool
>"Well, glad that's over. I honestly didn't know you needed a human to accompany you on rides."
>You nod and beam
"Good thing I got you then, huh?"
>"Right?!"
>Anon and you makes some silly faces as you walk towards the gate
>The ticket booth operator is a pony, which surprises you, but not really
>Anon lays his money down and puts a little necklace on you
>"That's your pop, try to hold onto it."
>You enter the park and finally get a chance to take in the scene
>In all directions, you see brightly colored tents and hear music from the streets
>Delicious foods dot the lanes with tempting treats like ice-cream and funnel cakes
>Monstrously tall rails suspend rollercoasters hundreds of feet above you and you cannot help but stare
>"Alright, what are we going to do first?"
"Roller... coaster..."
>What was that?"
"That one!"
>You point to a big, yellow coaster in the background
"I must ride that... I need to."
>"OK, lets go!"
>You and Anon rush through the place, only stopping to take in the smells now and then
>It doesn't take long to find yourself in a big line of both humans and ponies and you frown
>As if on queue, Anon and yourself speak in sync
"I really hate lines..."
>You look at each other for a moment with a bewildered sort of stare before he smiles
>"You're an easy one to love, you know that?"
>Blush begins to burn over your face as his eyes pin you down
"Y-you too..."
>The rest of the time in line finds you fidgeting about as your heart thumps much more loudly than you care for
>It must be about 30 minutes before you and Anon are finally seated, but it is a small price to pay for this ride
>You are buckled down in three directions and a metal bar holds you backwards
>Anon sits right beside you in the same type of harness and looks carefully to you
>"Ready for the rush?"
>You are always ready for this!
"You know it! Bring on the spins!"
>Anon cackles as the ride springs to life and you look out onto the whole of the world as the carts reach the top
>For one second, the world is a massive place of people and buildings and water
>The next, you are speeding down a track at a hundred miles an hour with your mane blowing wildly in the air
>Anonymous has some type of scared, but in control look on his face as you surely break the sound barrier on your descent
>You watch the blurs of colors pass you until you even out again and find the ride ending nearly as quickly as it began
"Wooh! That was great! By Celestia, I just have to go fast some days!"
>Anon nods and looks a little dizzy as he steps off the ride
>"Fun..."
>A sign catches your eye and you read it quickly
"Hey! That's another rollercoaster! Want to go?"
>Anon nods with a tired look already on his face
>"Oh, yes, one moment."
>He staggers about for a moment and you stand near his leg in case he falls
>You suddenly wonder if you could even hold Anon up
>"OK, lets get moving!"
>With the speed of a thousand stampeding buffalo, you race to the next coaster
>This one is fun, but not as fun as the next and even that one pales in comparison to the fourth and fifth rides
>As you exit the sixth rollercoaster, you happily trot in circles around Anon
"Oh, I love these things so much! I can't believe how good humans are at making rides! When I was a little filly, we only ever had one ride at the amusement park!"
>Anon is a little greener than usual and he stops to rest at a table
>He sits gently before flopping his upper half across the small, red boards
>"Glad... you're... happy..."
>You look him over and think you may have put him through enough rollercoasters for one afternoon
"Um... Hey, look! They got ice-cream! You want one?"
>"Think I'll pass for now..."
>You nod before looking at your hooves
"Y-yeah, you're right. It's too hot for ice-cream anyways."
>You poke at the dirt with your hoof a few times before Anon passes you his wallet
>"You can get some, Note. I just need to sit for a moment..."
"No, no, it's not the same if you're not eating one too."
>He chuckles sickly before rolling over
>You wait at Anon's side for the while as he recovers
"I didn't know rollercoasters were so rough on you. I wonder if it's because you are standing on two legs?"
>"I don't know... to be honest, I never liked them that much."
>It almost makes you stammer to find out Anon doesn't like fast rides after the way he drives
>You also think about how amazingly kind it is for him to take you on them
>He's really just trying to make you happy and you coo gleefully
"So, what do you like to do here?"
>"Anything you'd like..."
"No, no, I mean, what is -your- favorite thing to do here?"
>"Oh, I guess... I think I really like the games."
"Yeah, that's fun too! You feeling better yet?"
>Anon smiles weakly and stands up
>"Sure I am, lets go win some junk!"
>The two of you head down and find a nearby stall offering fabulously stuffed prized
>A human at the counter smiles to you ferociously before greeting you
>"Step right up, ladies and gents! Fillies and colts! Test your aim and accuracy here for just three dollars!"
>Anon quickly produces some human currency and hands it to the man
>"Fine, sir, very fine! All you need do is hit those bottles down there with this here baseball!"
>Something seems to change in Anon's expression as the ball enters his hands
>His face takes on a strong look of determination and he moves unnaturally smoothly
>"Pick one..."
"One what?"
>"A prize..."
>You look around at the stuffed toys and finally point to a small tiger
>"Hmm, a little small, but fine by me."
>Anon steps back and curls his body to the ball
>With an unblinking stare, Anon pivots from one leg and the ball releases his grip with a loud crack
>It soars at the bottles with a white-hot intensity and Anon's eyes grow wider
>The bottles burst from their resting place into any direction they can to escape the errant ball and Anon pumps his fist into the air in triumphant
>"Haha! That tiger is ours!"
"Wooh~!"
>You cheer alongside Anon with your front hooves in the air
>The stall owner has a disturbed look on his face as he hands Anon the toy and bids him farewell
>Anon's fist slams swiftly onto one side of the wooden board in front of him and he grins a wicked grin
>"I paid for three rounds... good sir."
>He seems rather intent on winning, you think, but at least he's having fun!
>Two more times Anon instructs you to choose your prize and two more times Anon wins easily
>Before long, you have three stuffed animals piling on your back and you wish you would have taken a saddlebag with you
"OK, I think you thoroughly destroyed all the bottles, Anon! What's next?"
>He looks around before rushing to a large, metal pole with numbers on it
>A silly looking and oversized hammer rests nearby and the owner of this game looks at Anon with a bit of curiosity
>"Hey there! Ring the bell, win a prize. Just two bucks."
>You think about the term for the moment until Anon hands the owner two human dollars
>It's a silly term for money, you think
>"Note, you see anything you like?"
"You are serious about this, huh? Hmm, oh, they have pony saddles here?"
>The owner smiles at you before speaking to Anon
>"Sure do... think you got the arms to win one for your little girly over here?"
>Anonymous' forehead furrows at the term and he shrinks back a bit
>"I-is that what you want, N-Note?"
>A new saddle would be nice even if the quality of these saddles is questionable
"Sure, the black and grey one is nice. It kind of matches your suit."
>Anon nods quickly before grabbing the hammer
>His dangerous gaze returns to the hammer and you swear his teeth are a little sharper than usual
>With a mighty swing, Anon causes the metal bullet to fly up into the bell
>It responds with a great ding and you cheer Anon on for his excellent work
>This game kind of looks really fun and simple enough, you imagine
"Hey, Anon, can I have a try?"
>"Sure, just be careful now, alright?"
>He holds out the mallet and you take it in your magic
>Even though Anon can lift it in one hand, you find it rather straining in your magic
>You dig your hooves into the floor for traction and swing down hard
>The bullet barely jumps a few inches, stopping at the words, "Weenie" before falling back into place
"What? No fair!! How did you do it?"
>You put the hammer down and sulk a bit
>Sure, Anon was strong, but that's just mean
>You're not a weenie and you reassure yourself a few times that you're a big mare
>"Guess I'm just good at carnival games?"
>Anon smirks before giving you the saddle he won
>"So, like... what's the saddle for?"
"To wear, silly."
>"No, I mean, I get that. Why are you wearing it though?"
"Well, this particular saddle isn't very trendy, but you're suppose to dress silly at amusement parts, right?"
>"I... you know... do you know? OK, let me rephrase. Saddles go on a horse..."
"Right."
>"... So that a human can ride them easier."
"What? Who told you that?"
>"No body, it's just... that's... I know that is what they're used for!"
"Anon, you're just plain crazy sometimes."
>You trot off in long legged strides as you show off your silly saddle
>Anon simply shakes his head as he follows along
>A great rumbling of thunder suddenly bellows before you, stopping Anon in his tracks
"I think it's a great time to stop for some lunch!"
>You poke your side to show how empty your stomach is and are presented to another gurgling roar
"Hehe... excuse me."
>Light blush spreads across your face, but Anon doesn't seem to mind
>"Let's see what's good."
>Anon scopes around for a moment before pointing down a path
>"You in the mood for pizza?"
>Your head bobs in rapid succession
"Pizza works! Oh~, a Coke would be great too!"
>The sweet taste of the delicious, fizzy drink makes your mouth water and you can already imagine the cold glass in your hooves
>Anon leads you to a small box-like building where you see a rather thin human woman working
>"Hello and welcome to Pi's Pizzas! What can I get ya' today?"
>Your glorious friend looks to you quickly as you read the menu
>"See anything in particular?"
>You spot the word, "Salad" and a longing feeling comes over you
>Leafy greens and crisp roots haven't touched your pallet since you arrived and the taste would probably be perfect with a Coke
"I... I think I'll have the salad, actually! And a Coke, a big Coke."
>The woman quickly presses some buttons on her cash register and smiles before Anon's order
>"I'll just do a slice of jalapeño pizza and a Sprite."
>"Sprite" rings in a familiar way to you, but you are almost certain Anon isn't ordering those little balls of light that like to steal day old bread
>"OK, cool! That'll be eleven dollars."
>Anon passes his money to the clerk and smiles
>"A little something extra for you."
>The human woman looks at the money and smiles even wider
>"Oh, thanks, man!"
>Anon interacting kindly with another human makes you step back and watch carefully
>It is rare, you believe, that Anon is too pleasant to other people
>Perhaps, it is rare that other people so willingly display kindness towards Anon
>Your head hurts momentarily as you try to figure this out, but the smell of a fresh salad snaps you out of it
>Anon holds all the food in a great balancing act as he walks to one table
>"Oh, uh, miss!"
>The human woman calls out to you and it makes you a little nervous for some reason
"Yes?"
>"Here's your Coke. This is the biggest cup we got."
>You are passed a massive cup made of some type of white plastic and nearly cry
"Thank you so much!"
>"Sure thing! Sure thing! Come again, OK?"
>You nod and smile at the incredibly kind human
>No words now, only Coke
>The straw bends slightly down in an "L" shape and you sip promptly as you canter off to meet Anon
>"Hey, you. Want to try Sprite?"
"I don't know..."
>Anon slides the cup across the table to you with a casual grin
>You look over the tip of the straw and think how Anon just put that in his mouth
>His weird, flat, but not entirely uninviting mouth
>A giggle tries to come out, but nothing more than a squeak leaves your throat
>Slowly, you lean in and gently place the straw in your mouth
>Your tongue glides under the warmed plastic tip and you close your eyes
>A small suckle draws a cool, airy drink into your mouth and you swallow it in a journalistic way
>It is not unlike the Coke, you think, if a little sweeter and a lot more bubbly
>You catch Anon watching you with a strange look on his face
>"Are you going to make love to my cup all evening?"
>Blush plays across your face as you realize your teasing the straw with you tongue and sliding your hoof over the thick rim
"Um, that's not it! I was, uh... grading it? Yeah! Grading it!"
>"So, what's the verdict?"
"It's good, but I am sticking to my Coke."
>You lift Anon's cup in your magic and pass it to him
>Anon passes you the salad and a few utensils quickly and you open the clear plastic container
>The smell sends a shiver up your back at how fresh the lettuce is and how wonderful the tomatoes look
>You bury your muzzle in quickly and scarf your food like a starving beast
>It dawns on you that Anon might be watching and this is very unladylike, but he seems to be shoving his pizza slice in with as much enthusiasm
>He's a great human, maybe the best ever!
>Lunch ends almost as quickly as it began and you lay to one side of your seat with a full belly
"That hit the spot."
>"Oh yeah, it did. This spot is nice and shady too."
>You yawn once and stretch yourself
>"Getting sleepy?"
"What? No, of course not! I'm just full and the suns a little high and the air feels nice and..."
>Anon eyes you up quickly before chuckling
>"We can hang out here a little longer if you want to. We rode damn near every rollercoaster in this place already. All that's left is maybe some arcade games, if you're into that sort of thing."
>Video games are fairly new in Equestria and you have only seen one or two actual game cabinets
>Right now, you don't feel incredibly interested in anything aside from a soft bed to take a nap in
>Maybe even snuggled up closely to some-person, you daydream
>"So, what's it like in Equestria?"
>Anon leans back in his chair as he looks to you
>From this angle, he mane looks really cute and you smile as you close your eyes
"It's beautiful. Lots of flowers and miles of green grass. At night, you can see all the stars and Princess Luna always makes a beautiful moon."
>"That sounds lovely."
"It is a little rustic for some ponies, but I like it all the same. It has a lot of charm, you know?"
>"Could I visit your home in Equestria?"
"Oh, yeah, sure! It'd be great to have you over. I'd get to show you all around town and we could take the train to Canterlot and..."
>You stop for a moment as your mind replays all the wondrous times you've had in Equestria
>A feeling of homesickness wells in your gut as you continue
>"Note? You OK?"
>You open your eyes as you feel a warm tear run down to your nose and you sniffle
"Yeah, I'm fine."
>"What's the matter?"
"Nothing... it's nothing! I just got a little journalistic is all."
>"A little what?"
"You know, journalistic? It's like... when you are writing a story and all these memories rush back to you and you think, 'Yeah, that's a good thing to write, ponies will like that'. It's kind of hard to explain."
>Anon seems to understand as well as he usually does
>A warm hand rests on your right hoof and you stare at it thoughtfully
>"Your home sounds lovely. I'm going to make it my business to visit you."
"That would be nice. Yeah, I'd like that a lot. I, um... I don't own as much nice stuff as you do though."
>"As if I'd need anything other than you to make my trip fun."
>Your breathing slows at the comment and you turn your eye up to look at your flattering friend
"Anon...?"
>"Yes, Note?"
"Carry me to the car?"
>He laughs quickly before standing up
>"Just this once..."
>You feel the strong, safe embrace of Anonymous as he holds you close to his body
>How you ever found such a great friend is beyond you, you think
>It is a shorter trip than you would have hoped as Anon sets you down to open the car door
>You enter in your usual manner and think about listening to music on the way
>The car is really hot inside when you enter, but Anon does something to get cool air blowing on you
>Anon asks you something, but you're a little sleepier than you thought
>With a mumble and a sigh, you lay against the soft cushions and slip off into the darkness of your own eyelids
>Zzz

>Be Anonymous the Chauffeur
>You turn the dial on the radio to lower the music before it wakes Note
>The day was fun thus far and you smile at her sleeping form
>Sometimes, it feels more like spending time with a child you've never had
>Her hair shines brilliantly in the fading sunlight as you begin your trip
>At this time of day, traffic should be thinned out enough to make it back with daylight to spare
>For the first time in a while, the car feels unnaturally quiet without Note asking questions or giving you her philosophy on music
>It is the strange sort of quiet that allows you to reflect on things and you think up the last few days with your friend
>She's a pony, you remind yourself, but then she is so much more to you and your heart grows fonder still
>Her air is just different than other people and ponies you've met
>She is wonderful to be around and makes you feel so alive
>It dawns on you that Noteworthy doesn't realize exactly who you are and you begin to think that is half the reason you feel this way
>You never told her you were the heir to a fortune and she never comments on your money or toys
>Others have come and gone and you knew they were in it for your wealth
>A small sigh snaps you to attention and you look over to your friend
>Her little mouth moves around until a sound finally breaks
>"A-non... I..."
>You focus in and listen closely
>"I... love..."
>The beating in your chest pounds in your ears as Note dreams on
>"I love... Coke..."
>A smile parts her dry lips as she rolls to one side and nestles her pleased face into the seat
>You hold back a laugh for the moment as you consider your feelings
>Love is a bad word, you think, because love asks too much of another person... or in this case, pony
>You look back to the sleeping form of your dear friend
>Her face looks stunning to you and you picture her bright, pink eyes staring towards you
>You whisper to yourself as you drive
"Note... I wonder if you feel the same?"
>A concerned expression crosses your features
>What if Noteworthy just wants to be friends, you fear?
>What if she's really conservative and thinks pony and human relationships are taboo?
>You get a sinking feeling in your chest as you think up terrible scenarios
>It takes you a moment, but you push the impossible ideas away and press the volume buttons behind your steering wheel
>The music comes up just slightly and you listen
>"Could you whisper in my ear, the things you wanna feel?"
>You look over to the screen on the stereo and realize your music playlist is running
>Noteworthy stirs rather quickly with a silent yawn
>A smile creeps lazily up her face and her voice squeaks dryly
>"Oh, I like this song... would you turn it up?"
>You press the button a few more times until the radio is lively
>Note looks at you quickly and her sparkling eyes shine on their own in the fading twilight
>"Sorry I fell asleep on you."
"No, no, it's fine..."
>"Hey, can you sing along?"
"W-what?"
>"You know the words, right?"
>She gives you a look that nearly melts your heart and you just sigh and grin
>"I wanna wake up where you are... I won't say anything at all. Yes! And I'll do anything you ever dreamed to be complete! Little pieces of the nothing that fall~!"
>You watch your little friend's eyes light up and her smile grow even wider
>Your natural showmanship works its way into the next few lines and you watch Note's eyes fixate on you
>She sometimes just blankly stares at you and you're not sure why
>You turn your head just enough to see her brilliant eyes and you flash her a smile
>She shutters quickly as the music fades before whispering
>"... Got it..."
>It's taken a few days, but you're pretty used to that look by now
>If it means seeing her shining eyes and happy face, you'd let her stare into nothingness all the time
>The drive ends shortly thereafter as you pull up the drive and into the garage
"Home, sweet home!"
>You press a button on your key ring to start the coffee maker
>A cup would be great to pick up your tired head\
"So, Note... did you have fun?"
>"Did I ever! Humans make the best rollercoasters, no doubt! I wonder if there's a story about engineering in this somewhere."
>You chuckle as you open the front door and disable your alarm
>A clock on the wall chimes as you enter
>Seven at night, you think, still fairly early
"Are you hungry, Note?"
>The little mare bounces around the foyer with a clopping sound
>"A little, are you?"
"A bit, yeah."
>You enter the kitchen and watch the pot filling with delicious, café-grade French Vanilla
>Noteworthy stops to sniff the air before letting go a curious groan
>"Did you make coffee?"
"Yes, you drink?"
>"Oh yeah! Especially when I have to burn the midnight oil! Speaking of which... how do you light this kitchen without lanterns?"
"I went with a mixture of recess and track lighting. Haven't used the track in a while though."
>You slide a button on the wall to see if the dimmer even works anymore
>Sure enough, the tracks by the island light up and give a nice spotlight effect on your pots and pans
>"That's awesome! How'd you do it?"
"This lever controls the lights over there."
>"Hmm, didn't you tell me earlier you wanted to show me something?"
>You stop to think for the moment before you remember
"Oh, right! Come with me."
>You leave the coffee for the moment and head towards you study with Note in tow
>"Whoa, look at the size of this office!"
"You like it?"
>"Like it? It's nearly as big as my whole apartment! I could write and edit stories for months before cleaning off the walls!"
>You smirk and approach your computer
"You ever see one of these?"
>Note squints her eyes and rubs her chin
>"Is it another TV? You have a lot of them, you know?"
"No, no, this is a computer. It's much better than a TV."
>"What's it do?"
"It gives you access to the whole world and then some."
>"I... don't get it."
>You jiggle the mouse until the screen comes to life and Note watches intently
>Opening up your browser, you ready the search engine and look to your friend
"So, name a topic, any topic, you want to know about."
>"Um... uh... the latest mane styles?"
>You shrug and type it into the search bar
>In seconds, you are presented thousands of web pages and even more imagines of ponies from Vogue and Trot Magazine
>"What the... Look at all these ponies! How did you do that?"
"The internet is a magical thing, my friend."
>"So, I can tell this, 'Internet' to find me something I want to look at and it'll just do it?"
>You figure that's a good way to explain such technology and nod
>"Internet! Show me where I left my red quill!"
>You cover your face in your palm quickly and laugh
"Not quite. You can search for information -on- the internet, but you can't use it like some kind of magic divining rod."
>"I see... so, what would happen if I ask for a red quill?"
>You type it in and are presented with everything from the history of quill pens to where to buy them now
>"Oh, neat! Why does this say, 'But it now'?"
"Well, you can make a purchase and have the quills delivered to the house here."
>"That is so convenient! Why don't we have this in Ponyville?!"
>Note seems overly excited and you imagine that Equestria is a bit more behind in the technologic department than you first assumed
>You show note a few more things, like YouTube and a few free radio stations, before leaving her to her own devices
"I'm going to get some coffee, you want anything?"
>"No... no... I'm fine..."
>You see her mesmerized face as she watches the cat bat the yarn around a little while longer
>Slipping out into the kitchen, you find the night to be comfortably cool
>A warm cup of coffee fills one hand and you take a can of Coke back with you
>You know how much Note adores this soda, she'll be happy
>Entering your study, you find Noteworthy scowling and your keyboard flipped over
"Hmm, what happened?"
>"I... I tried to type something... like you did..."
"And then?"
>"I, um... it was an accident."
>Note levitates a good fistful of keys from your keyboard and you look at her with a puzzled glare
>You turn your keyboard over to see a hoof shaped impression where half the letters of a keyboard should be
"No big... Coke?"
>She looks at you with shimmering eyes as if she's about to cry any moment
"They come off, it's fine..."
>A sniffle sounds out as Note nods
>"O... K. I'm really sorry, Anon. Please believe me that it was an accident!"
>You squat down to her level and place your hands on her shoulders
"I know... don't worry! Everything is fine, it's just a keyboard."
>Another item suddenly floats up before you
>It is your mouse, or at least, what is left of your mouse
>The left finger and first thumb button is crushed in and you almost don't understand how that happened
>"I'm sorry, I didn't know how fragile it was! I... I just wanted to press the button again."
>You shrug and pull Note into you
"This stuff wasn't really made with ponies in mind. Don't worry, I'll get a new one."
>You hold her tightly to you and assure her you are not angry
>"I have some bits with me, I'll pay for the damages."
"Note... Noteworthy..."
>She sniffles and looks at you
"Stop being a baby and drink your soda!"
>You grin at her before pushing the can against her body
>She giggles slightly in between her sobs and you pop the can open for her
>"Thank you, Anon..."
"Don't worry about little things like that."
>"But, it's your magic machine?"
"I'll get a new mouse and keyboard."
>You dangle the crushed mouse before her
"In fact, we can make a trip out of that tomorrow..."
>Your pocket vibrates for the first time in days and you reach for your phone
>The number is unfamiliar and being this late makes you wonder who could be calling
>Note watches you carefully as you lift the device to your ear
"Hello, this is Anonymous..."
>A familiar voice echoes through the phone and your blood chills in seconds
>"Good, just the person I wanted to speak to. This is Helen, I am sure you remember me."
>That political wench has been a thorn in your side since ponies first crossed over to Earth
"Yes, I do... what a -pleasure- it is to hear from you... again."
>"Likewise, I have a conference coming up and I want you to be there."
"What? Why? I am on vacation."
>"I don't care. Be at the Marriott on Broadway this Friday at 3:00 pm and dress like an adult."
"And if I refuse?"
>"Cute... If you refuse to show up and be my guest speaker, you may have trouble finding the other board members looking in your favor."
"You can't sway them over one conference. They love my project and realize how important it is."
>"Yes, they do, but you aren't the most well-received person when it comes to the law. Remember that little malpractice suit, 'The State vs. Dr. Fetlock'?"
"I hate you..."
>"Likewise... 3:00 pm sharp tomorrow. Oh, and Anonymous? We'll expect your -house guest- to be there with you."
>You hang up the phone and clench your fist angrily
>"Anon? Is everything alright? Who were you talking with?"
>A burst of anger spills out in your sigh before you begin
"Well, Note, how does a new outfit sound to you?"
>"I don't mind more clothes, but that doesn't answer..."
"Great! Shopping tomorrow!"
>"I can tell when you're lying, Anon. Your eye gets all twitchy and you start flexing you right hand a lot. Tell me what's going on."
"Fine, if you want to know. We are going on a business meeting tomorrow. All you have to do is smile and wave. I will be talking to some other people about a few laws."
>"And?"
"And... hopefully, they bite."
>"And that's a good thing?"
"Yes, it is. Currently, ponies aren't allowed to get health insurance unless they work and their employer offers them a veterinary insurance policy. I am trying to make it so vets can take human coverage for Equestrians and that Equestrians have a right to medical care."
>Note seems a little frazzled by all this information
>"I had no idea... what have ponies been doing if they are hurt or sick?"
"To be honest? I have no idea. I know there is currently a bunch of unregistered Equestrian physicians, which is illegal in this country, who will see any pony for free. I hear that quite a few go back home for treatment... if they can."
>"Healthcare in Equestria is free, as far as I know, nop0ny can be turned away if they're in need."
"The laws on Earth haven't been as favourable to Equestrians as we would hope. But, enough about that. I am sure it'll be over as fast as we begin."
>"Don't worry, Anon! As an ace journalist, I will be sure to take a ton of notes, watch the crowds and get the scoop on anything I can!"
"Don't make too much of a scene... last thing we need is a bunch of paparazzi following us around town. Also, if anyone asks, you are solely in my care."
>Note seems to laugh at the last few words
>A knot ties up your stomach and you find it impossible to even drink your coffee
"I'm going to take a shower, actually. Kitchen is all yours if you want a snack."
>Note nods to you before smiling
>"You, um, you want to watch a movie tonight?"
"Sure, you remember how to work the TV?"
>"You bet I do! I'll find something to relax after so much excitement today."
>A smile crosses your face, even if it is a little hollow
>It takes no time to shower and you relax under the hot water
>The rollercoasters really took it out of you and your back feels twisted and tight
>Stepping from the bathroom, you meet Note halfway in the hall with a towel on her head and her clothing somewhere other
>"Hey, you! I found a movie that looked interesting. It's about journalism!"
>You rub your chin and wonder which movie that could be
>Note trots along the carpet with soft thuds in her wake and you follow her down the steps
>She insists that you sit down first before she climbs up and lays against you
>Her fur is very warm and she smells like the faintest bit of lilac shampoo
>"OK, starting the movie up."
>The little mare holds the remote in her magic and you watch the buttons press under invisible force
>The movie begins and you wait until the title appears
"The Notebook? I don't this movie is about journalism, Note."
>"How sure are you?"
"Pretty sure..."
>"Well then, we better watch it to make sure."
>Reclining back, you lay an arm across Note's back to rest your muscles
>You stroke her idly as the movie begins and reserve yourself to watching whatever it may be
>You know it's some kind of romance, but, "Chick Flicks" are fine on occasion
>The story, you find, is actually quite good and the emotions are real enough from the actors
>Note finds her way closer and closer to you as the movie progresses'
>Somewhere along the lines, you and your wide eyed mare friend are laying side by side
>Her mane nestles under your chin and your arms hold Note about her waist
>Note whispers up to you as if trying not to interrupt the movie
>"Allie is a little bit crazy, but I like her."
"Noah seems like an alright guy."
>"They look happy though. That's all that counts in love, right?"
"I suppose so..."
>Note looks up to you and smiles a little
>"I didn't realize they would have so many love making scene. Humans do it -way- differently."
>She giggles quietly with her hoof in front of her muzzle
"It's not a romance movie unless two people end up wrapped up in each other."
>"I know, right? Same for romance movies in Equestria!"
>Note looks around for a minute and then back up to you
>"We're kind of wrapped..."
"Yes, yes, that lampshade was hung."
>She smiles to you and you can't help but smile back
>Her eyes are mystifying in the TVs glare
>"Hey, Anon?"
"Yes?"
>"You're really comfy."
>You run your fingers in straight lines down the smooth fur on her belly
>Noteworthy sighs contently with your casual petting
>The movie ends with the credits rolling and you let go a yawn
"Ready to turn in?"
>Note looks up at you with a skeptical gaze
>"To what?"
>You mess her mane with one hand and she giggles
"That's what I like that about you, Note. You listen."
>She laughs and you run your fingers through her silky mane
>"Could we... you know, stay here on the couch? Just for tonight, I mean."
>You don't mind the idea, but professionalism nags at your mind
"We could, sure. Are you comfortable like that."
>"Oh, so comfortable."
>You feel a tail work its way around your leg
"Hey, Note... what's your opinion on cross species relationships?"
>Her neck turns at an odd angle as she looks up at you
>"In my professional opinion?"
>Note's mouth darts to your own and steals a kiss from your lips
>You look at her as she quickly resumes her lounging position
>"It's definitely a good topic to write about. There's a lot of -benefits- to weigh and consequences to take into consideration. On the whole, I think that happiness is what counts."
>You feel powerful hind muscles draw closer to you until you are forcibly spooning with the lovely mare
>"Why, what do -you- think about the idea?"
"I think it's fine... like you said, happiness and all that."
>A feeling of heat radiates from your face and you bury your head in a pillow to cool off
"Good night, Note..."
>"Night, Anon."
>You hold her a little tighter now as you close your eyes
>It would be a shame to wake up and find this all was nothing but a lovely dream
>As you lie, you can't shake the feeling of another presence in the room tonight
>You open your eyes and look to Note to see she is already asleep
>A large shadow plays across the floor from you kitchen and into the foyer
>It looks not unlike moonlight, but a bit more substantial
>You push the feeling aside for now and gently squeeze your little pony
"See you in the AM, darling..."
>You kiss her forehead gently before laying down and finally falling asleep

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

>Day WHAT?! on Earth
>Be Noteworthy
>You awake on the couch to find it roomier than last night
>Groping around confirms that Anonymous is not beside you
>You open your eyes slowly and take in the sunlight
>It is a warm kind of morning and your fur feels so cozy
>A voice rings out from upstairs and you look up
>Anonymous is standing above in a suit you have never seen
>It is considerably fancier than his more casual clothing and it makes you wonder just how many different suits Anon truly has
>"Come on, Note. We got a lot to do and a very little amount of time to do it in."
>Anon sounds rather rushed and flustered
>You stretch your hind legs and then get to your hooves with a small yawn
"What's the matter, Anon?"
>"We have a big day today and I'm going to need to get you dressed up."
"Oh, are we going to buy some new clothes again?"
>"Yes, we are. Now, hop into the shower."
>Anon walks faster around the upstairs floor and you decide it would be best to listen to him
>Freshening up takes a little while longer than usual as your sleepy mind tries to dream up what has Anon so anxious
>Stepping into the hallway, you find Anonymous waiting around with a grim expression on his face
"Hey, you... How's everything?"
>"It's fine, come on."
>Anon beckons you with a simple wave and you both head out the door and into the car
>As the engine starts, Anon turns the radio off
>You feel kind of nervous as he looks at you
"So, um... sleep good?"
>You smile as kindly as you can
>"Yeah..."
>Anon wears the expression of a funeral attendee
>With a quick motion, the car begins to move and you are on your way in utter silence
>You study Anon's face for a while and you can't help but feel that he is hiding something
"Anon... Is something wrong?"
>"No, nothing. It's going to be fine."
>A worried feeling takes hold of you and you twiddle your hooves
>Being nervous is kind of rare for you, but you think you can handle it for a little while
>You arrive in town in record time and Anon helps you out of the car
>"OK, let’s get you a nice outfit. Presentation is key today. Keep your head up..."
>You enter the odd clothing store and look around
>There are many racks of dark suit clothes like Anonymous likes to wear in both pony and human shapes
>It makes you curious as your eyes scan the poorly lit store for any sign of an owner
>A human with a grey mane and saggy skin spies you two at the entrance and slowly walks over
>"Hello there, Anonymous, sir! Are you back already for another jacket?"
>"No, thank you. The last few have been excellent."
>"I see you're wearing -that- coat today; big meeting?"
>Anon scowls and holds out his hand
>"Enough!"
>Both you and the clerk look to him with a little more than fright on your face
>He begins again in a calmer, but no less icy, tone
>"I need an outfit for my dear friend here. She has to look as good as I."
>Anon's hand raises to his chest before motioning back towards you and you find the gesture difficult to comprehend
>"Well, I just got a shipment in from Equestria. It's a new line up called, "A Touch of Gemstone", by that one seamstress... Oh, her name slips my mind right now."
>"Fine, yes, sounds great..."
>Anon looks to you with a stern look
>"... Let’s get you fitted, shall we?"
>You walk close to Anon, despite the distance you feel, and enter a back room
>The shop keep disappears shortly only to return with a few sparkling outfits
>They seem to be made up of material and jewels from Equestria and look dreadfully expensive by pony standards
>The first outfit you try on makes you look a bit too bulky
>It has a nice vest and you decide to keep that piece on the side
>Six polished gem stones make up the buttons on the black cotton material and you smirk in the mirror
>You take a pair of dark pants from another outfit and button them up
>They are a little tight in the hindquarters, but what isn't on Earth?
>The vest and pants look very stylish, you think as you reach for a coat from the final outfit
>It slips over your shoulders and rests easily on your frame
>This combination of parts forms the perfect ensemble and you step from the dressing room
>The human clerk sees you first and his jaw drops in astonishment
>"What on Earth did you do?! Why did you take apart all those masterpieces?!"
"Um, I thought I was supposed to be trying them on?"
>"Yes, the outfit as it was meant to be worn! You-you-you... This is a disaster!"
>Anon suddenly appears from nowhere in particular and his face is intense
>"-What- is a disaster?"
>"Your friend, she has dismantled the finely paired suits with reckless abandon! Please, explain to her why they are meant to be worn as a whole!"
>Your friend's face twists and contorts into something wholly unnatural
>"I hate, absolutely -hate- every single item you've shown me. Is this not where the sophistication of the world is suppose to reside? What kind of cheap, 'Macy's' knock-off did you get these outfits from?!"
>The other human shrinks and stammers at Anon's words and even you think he is being a little loud about this
>"Note, get rid of that garbage. You are too good to be seen in such trash."
>You listen to Anon's compliment, but something about it seems off
>Everything about today has been off and you put your hoof down both literally and figuratively
"No, Anon! I like how this looks! What's wrong with you?!"
>He furrows his eyes at you and you meet him in kind
>"Noteworthy, this is not the time..."
"This is the perfect time! What is wrong with you?"
>"You are making a scene..."
"And you are being a mule! Tell me what is going on!"
>"We do not have time for arguing!"
"You don't, but I do! I am not going anywhere until you tell me what we're doing!"
>Your chest huffs from the yelling and you want to cry at how sharply Anon glares back
>Why Anon is acting like this is beyond anything you would have imagined
>"Damn it... fine... I am not suppose to say anything. Get in the changing room."
>You look harshly at Anon and slowly back up into the small booth
>He follows you in and closes the door quickly before sighing
>Anon sits down and rubs his face in a small circle with his phone in his free hand
>"Read this..."
>You look at the screen and see a message neatly typed down
"Anon... this is Helen with a quick update. Our meeting is going to be discreet before any public announcements come out. The -Sun- and -Moon- will both be rising and are expecting you. Don't fuck this up for me. Toodeloo. Smiley face."
>As you finish up, you think quickly
>It dawns on you like the very sun dawns over Canterlot
"P-Princess Celestia? Here? Princess Luna!?"
>"Keep it down! Yes, that is why I am on edge... I... I'm sorry I snapped at you."
>You see Anon sulk and his eyes take on that original loveliness you know him for
>It takes a moment, but you get on your back legs and hug Anonymous for all you're worth
"Don't be so hard on yourself. I was worried before, but now I'm just darn terrified!"
>You let out a nervous sort of giggle and press your face into Anon's chin
>"I want you to know, Note, that these last few days have been the best of my life."
"You can't mean that..."
>"... I do, Note. I really do."
>You look up to see Anon staring back at you and the world stands still for the moment
"Why are you afraid of the Princess? She is the nicest, wisest, most understanding pony of all time."
>"This is just about the end. Today is it, everything, the end game. If I fail, if something goes wrong, I lose everything I've been building."
>You rub your cheek to his own and feel a wet, warm human tear
>It is impossible for you to understand his view now and you just work to console him
"You won't fail, Anon. You are too good at being you. If you show the Princess just what you showed me, I think everyp0ny would like you."
>You feel two strong arms warp around your back and hold you tightly while Anon sobs a bit
>"Thank you... Note..."
>A small gasping noise emits from Anon as he tries to calm
>You return his hug with twice the fervor to show him how much you mean what you said
>"You don't need this, Note. This suit isn't you..."
>Anon's hands release you and start sliding into your fur
>His strong fingers undo the clothing's bindings and you feel each article come loose under his expert ministrations
>"A red dress, what do you think? That shimmers, even. That's you, Note. Beautiful, fiery, passionate. A burning hot personality that everyone should meet."
>Anon regains the passion you know him for as he strips you down to your natural form
"R-red sounds nice, heh..."
>You try not to fall victim to your own emotions as Anon teases your senses
>"And we'll get your hair done, yeah, would you like that?"
>Your handsome friend runs his fingers through your mane a few times and grazes your sensitive horn
"Y-y-yeah, my mane... I'd l-like that..."
>"Thank you, Noteworthy, for snapping me back to reality. I am sorry I lost it there."
"N-no problem..."
>You close your eyes as Anon pets down your face and pulls you into his chest again
>His heart thumps with a happy rhythm just for you
>He leans you slightly from him and stares into your very being
>"How'd I find a pony as wonderful as you?"
"A-Anon..."
>You slightly pucker your lips and close your eyes
>The anticipation beats loudly in your throat as you imagine, any second, Anon will make amends with you in the way only a stallion can
>A sudden pull lifts you off the ground and into Anon's arms as he smiles
>"Come now, I'll carry you to the car for all this trouble."
"Oh-h~... Yeah, -carrying-, that's... that's what I thinking too."
>You smile in a disappointed way before enjoying Anon's welcoming affection again
>The shopkeeper makes some comment to Anon and he responds with a simple form of human sign-language that involves extending one finger at the center of his hand
>You suppose it means something particularly powerful to other humans as they all quickly ignore Anon when he makes such gestures
>It takes a few moments to reach the car and Anon sets you down to your hooves again while he reaches for the door
>He looks to you with wobbly, wet eyes and you feel how upset he is
"What's the matter?"
>"Nothing, actually."
>Anon lets out a short chuckle before letting you into the car and you buckle yourself in
>He runs around to the other side and hops in with a faint smile on his lips
>"Here..."
>A finger slides along a circle on the radio and it comes to life
>"... Put on whatever you want."
>You return the smile and humbly refuse
"How about we just talk, you know?"
>"I'd like that..."
>It is quiet for the moment, but a good kind of quiet where you can reflect
>"Blueberry ice-cream..."
"Hmm, what?"
>"I remember you telling me that you ate a blueberry ice-cream at least once a week because you loved them."
"Oh... Oh! Yeah! You know, I haven't had one at all this week."
>You lean in and smile to your dear friend
>"We should make it our business to get some ice-cream later. I know a great place too."
>It takes a minute, but you recall another fun topic
"Remember the letters from when we first started writing?"
>"Most of them, yes."
"I kept our very first letter. Have it framed on my desk at work. You should see how many screwy stamps they put on it because the address was written so weird."
>"Hah! Yeah, I had no idea how to properly address letters in Equestria at that time. The postage alone was crazy to me."
"I know it costs me nearly ten bits to send it to the human world."
>"Hmm, that used to be a chunk of change in America. A bit from your home, especially the royal bits, were worth a lot here. It was kind of funny when people first started examining the Equestrian bit."
"Funny? What happened?"
>"Well, gold here was worth about 1.400 USD per ounce at one point. Suddenly, ponies were stepping into Earth with bags filled with what humans thought was precious. The markets were flooded and bullion went straight to nothing."
"Wait, humans thought bits would be precious? Why?"
>"Humans use gold in everything. It is weird to think, but most of my car is made of gold in one part or another. It is an amazing material for electronic devices."
"Weird... gold is just everywhere in Equestria. It's kind of valuable because it resembles the sun. That's why we use it as currency anyways."
>Anon nods sagely with your analysis before continuing
>"A few ponies who were specialized in excavation explained to humans how nearly every square foot of Equestrian soil was littered with gold and silver or precious gemstones."
>You think about this for a while and never realized that Earth would be lacking such common minerals as gold
>An odd thought crosses your mind about what else Earth may not have
"I wonder why humans don't just come over and sell things? I mean, humans have really neat stuff."
>"That would be the Princess' decision. The first few humans who came to Equestria had some... issues adjusting."
"What? Equestria is beautiful! How could humans -not- like it?"
>"Some humans are, for lack of a better word, morons. They saw Equestria and already planned to lay down malls and highways."
>You don't mind the mall idea so much as you think about the neat things humans might sell
>The food alone would probably help Ponyville's otherwise bland assortment
"It seems that ponies took to the human world pretty well though."
>"It looks that way, yes. Humans get over meeting alien races pretty quickly, so long as we all speak the same language."
"You know, since we started writing each other, I've always wondered how you knew how to speak Equestrian?"
>"Interestingly enough, we have a language known as English here that just so happens to sound like Equestrian. Though, I know that Equestria has many other languages that we also have analogues for."
>A grin plays over your face."
"I took two years of Andalusian in school! Here, watch!"
>You clear your throat and try to smooth your voice for the required accent
"¡ Hola ! ¿ Cómo estás ? That is Andalusian for..."
>Anon quickly interjects
>"... Hello, how are you? Estudié pocos años también."
>He smiles to you with an interestingly pleased look
>"Good to see you have studied other languages. It always perplexes me to think that anyone could get by in life with just one."
>You smile at how highly Anon places you on his strangely perceived list of values
>It is always nice knowing that he looks to your mind as much as he notices your hips
>A hoof pushes on your hip slowly and sinks in a bit, just to check if they are really so noticeable
>« Est-ce que tu parles français ? »
>The sound catches your attention and you look to Anon
>His eyes are lit up and you see the remnants of a question hanging from his lips
"I... I am not sure. Say it again?"
>Anon repeats himself a little slower
>« Est-ce que tu parles français ? »
"I don't think that is Andalusian?"
>"On Earth, it is known as, 'French'. It is consider to be the language of love, but really, it's about as standard as the other, 'Romance' languages."
"Hmm, interesting. How much more of Earth is there to see?"
>"Since we haven't once left the city here, I would estimate about a hundred-thousand more miles in every direction. Earth is massive and it would be nearly impossible to see it all. At least, on a seven day vacation."
>You try to comprehend the vastness of Earth through Anon's words, but to no avail
>It is hard to imagine that many more giant cities with even more humans exist
>As you ponder, you feel Anon park the car and the rumbling subside
>"I think you will like this place."
>You hop from the car and rush to Anon's side as he enters the store
>As you step before the door, it slides to one side and allows you both entrance
>It is an odd bit of magic, you think, and more than a little boastful!
>The first thing your eye catches is a mare sitting at a horseshoe-shaped desk
>You two approach her before Anon begins
>"Miss, I am here to see the, 'Designer'."
>The mare's eyes perk up for a moment
>"I am sorry, sir, but she is not taking guests at this time."
>Anon smiles slyly and lays a card before the clerk
>"I am sure she won't mind seeing me."
>The mare lifts the card carefully before jittering like she had just seen a huge spider
>She quickly presses a button and speaks into a small microphone
>"The, 'Doctor' is in, Miss Rarity."
>You hear a muffled voice call back before the mare points towards a wall
>Anon kindly smiles and thanks her for the time
>You watch as Anon walks to the metal doors and presses a button
>A light flashes and you can hear mechanics turning for a few moments
>The metal doors suddenly open and Anon walks into a small room
>"Come along, Note. You certainly don't want to take the stairs."
>You do not understand entirely, but do as your trustworthy friend asks
>Stepping inside, you hear a light music playing and watch the doors close on the outside world
>This place is kind of stuffy, you think as you fidget in the confined space
>Anon presses a button that lights up with the number 36 in a luminous blue
>"Is this your first time in an elevator?"
"A what?"
>Before you have time to hear an answer, your body is pulled to the floor
>You scream in terror as you feel the pressure on you
>Anon kind of chuckles at you and leans onto one corner
>"Elevators are much faster than taking the stairs. Simply put, they travel up or down very quickly."
>You hate human technology sometimes!
>The numbers fly by rapidly until you come to 35
>A halting feeling takes over you as the pressure fades and you can stand up again without wobbling
>Some bell rings inside your metal box and the light ticks to 36
>You quickly step out as the doors move aside and you stretch every hoof once
>Despite the invisible weight lifted from you, it stills feels uncomfortably heavy
>Anon walks slightly ahead of you now and you take in the sights from where you are
>Massive windows line every wall and some on the ceiling as well and the sun seems to shine more radiantly from this building
>You giggle to yourself as a cloud passes neatly above your head and for a minute you are lost in the majesty of the sky
>A sudden realization kicks in long enough for you to ask Anon where you are exactly
"Anon, you said we went up, right?"
>"Yes, we did."
"How, 'up' are we now?"
>"Hmm, approximately 300 feet skyward."
"Oh... That makes sense. Look how close the clouds are! I almost feel like a pegasus at this angle."
>You consider what it would be like for a unicorn to fly for the moment and then sigh a smooth, happy sigh
"What are we doing up here anyway?"
>"Seeing a friend."
>A journalistic grin crawls over your muzzle at Anon's words
>You continue walking through the hallway until you come upon a pair of gilded doors that have large letter R's written in jewels upon them
>Anon opens the door and steps inside with a different type of canter to him
> « Madame Rarity ! C'est moi, Anon ! »
>For a moment, the room is still and Anon's voice seems to simply disappear in the space
>You listen closely as the sound of a pony's gait picks up over the stillness
>A white unicorn with a purple mane appears from behind a pile of clothing and you are startled
>She looks like a run-way model in Canterlot with perfect hair and elegantly applied makeup
>Her cutie mark shines proudly on her backside as you notice she is not in any type of dress
>Never have you seen a more gorgeous mare outside of the movies!
> « Anonymous ! Comment vas-tu, mon chéri ? »
>Without hesitation, the white unicorn stampedes towards Anon and he readily takes her in his arms
>You feel a burning scowl on your face as you witness this scene
>Just who does this unicorn think she is to invade the arms of -your- friend?
>They say a few more things as rapidly as other languages often do before you butt in
>You wedge yourself between Anon and the usurper with the most practiced smile you can muster
"Hello! Name's Noteworthy, columnist. Good to meet you! I, that is, meeting -you- for the first time. I see -you- already know Anon. Let's chat..."
>You lower your head and pin your ears, mostly unconsciously, at the intruder
>"Oh, I didn't notice you there, darling. Anonymous, do you know her?"
"Yes, she is visiting from Ponyville for the week."
>Rarity smiles and seems to daydream for the moment
>”Ponyville? How lovely it is in the spring time…
>She turns quickly to you once more
>"My, my, what -have- you been doing to yourself?"
>The unicorn quickly rubs her hooves on either side of your face and draws you closer to her
>"Look at the state of your poor mane. Tsk, tsk, this will never do."
>She drops you and you rub a sore cheek gently
>"Anonymous, I know -exactly- why you are here."
>"You do?"
>The mare smiles at you quickly
>"You are taking this poor creature to me to have the very finest mane treatment performed and I must say that you are not a moment too soon!"
>She lays her leg across her forehead and swoons towards Anon
>What a drama queen!
>"This is true, yes. I also came to ask you a very personal favour, dear Rarity."
>"A personal favour... From -moi-? Oh, do go on, Anon."
>She saunters up to Anonymous again with her tail slightly raised and her lush eyelashes batting gently in his direction
>Never have you felt so much anger for another living being before
>You take a few deep breaths and tell yourself to calm down
>Two ponies can be friends without anything getting really serious, you think
>Her porcelain hooves wrap delicately around his face and hold him steady
>"You know it will cost you though, hmm?"
>"Rarity, this may not be the best time..."
>"I think you really require my services, 'Doctor' and I know I am long overdue for a -checkup-."
>Your eyes bulge from their sockets and you are sure you just popped a blood vessel or eight
>"Madame, I don't quite think you understand... this is Noteworthy, my pen-pal."
>Rarity seems to stop and turn to you slowly without really releasing Anon
>"So, she is the pony who has won your eye... I see..."
>With no compassion at all, Rarity spins about and locks lips with your friend
>You stand in place as frozen as the very time around you
>Seconds feel like hours as you watch Anon's eyes close under the feeling of another's mouth
>The kiss breaks as Rarity steps away from the stunned Anonymous
>"Well, I am just glad to see that you are happy, darling! It's not often I get to design a wedding dress for my best friend and his bride."
"Whoa! Time out! What in the name of Celestia just happened?!"
>You yell a little louder than you think you needed to, but it sure feels good to shout
>Rarity trots around you with a length of measuring tape and begins taking your size down
>"Anonymous has told me all about you, darling.”
“Huh, interesting. He never told me anything about another pony…”
>”Oh, I believe you. Anon is so shy sometimes! He can stand in front of the world and tell them what they should do, but if I kissed him in public, he would turn as red a strawberry!”
>You suddenly snicker at that information
“How often was -that-?”
>“Sadly, not so often. We tried dating for a while, but our lives are just so very busy and I am usually not even on Earth. We're still just the best of friends, though, don't get me wrong."
"What about the kiss just now?"
>"What’s a kiss between good friends, darling?"
>Anon stands to his full height and sighs a deep, frustrated sigh
>"Rarity, be gentle. Yes, we go back quite a while, but it has been very professional."
>"Oh, yes, darling! The time we took that trip to Venice on your yacht was delightful! I remember you serenading me under the cool glow of the moon while the candles burned in the night."
>"I was thinking more along the lines of when you were rushed to me on the verge of dying..."
>"... And how you nursed me back to full health, taking the pain away. Tragically, you had stolen my heart in the same process."
>The white mare leans on your back and sighs happily
>It takes a lot of will power to not buck her off you
>"Now, Rarity, Noteworthy and I are just good friends. We are not getting married."
>Rarity stops and looks up with wide eyes
>"You're not?"
>"No, we have a very important meeting to go to today and I was hoping you had a dress I could borrow?"
>"Always business with you, Anon. Don’t you ever think of settling down with a nice mare and rearing a few foals? You would make the finest father, I know it."
>So do you, but the pony in question would be unquestionably different
>You slip away from the seamstress and quickly trot to Anon
"Well, this has been great, but we should probably be going now..."
>Rarity slowly approaches with a notepad in her magic
>"Going? Oh, no, no, no, darling! We have a makeover to attend to!"
>You are pulled into a backroom and tossed into a chair
>”What to do with this wild mane?”
>Rarity holds her chin and thinks for a moment before jumping to her hooves
>”Yes! Rarity, you are a genius sometimes!”
>The self-congratulating unicorn races around the room for supplies before gathering a massive assortment of tools
“Now, just so you know, I’ve never done a story about fashion before.”
>”What ever do you mean, darling?”
“This is a little new to me…”
>The white mare simply laughs before brandishing a pair of scissors
>You shake with fear and excitement as the sound of metal blades buzzes around your head
>Perfumes invade your nose and water flows over your hair a dozen times
>Rarity brushes your mane and glosses your fur a few times before filing each of your hooves
>”Oh, darling… You look simply… Darling!”
>A mirror appears and you get a good look at the new you
>Thinking about how you last look, you raise a questionable eyebrow to the elegant pony
“Sorry, but… I don’t look different at all.”
>”Of course not! Why would I interfere with your nature beauty? You only needed a bit of sprucing up.”
>Your mouth hangs open at the compliment
>”Now, we’re did I put that dress?”
>Rarity begins rummaging among a rack of clothing
>With a high pitched squeal of delight, she reveals a green dress bedecked in gemstones
>”It matches your mane perfectly, darling! Let me just make a few adjustments to the shoulders and croup.”
>You try not to let Rarity notice how much that remark stings
>Rarity disappears behind a corner and you slowly let the scenery sink in
>The chair you are sitting in seems to be in a middle of an explosion of clothing and makeup supplies
>A stack of magazines sit haphazardly to one side and you spy your hostess' image on every cover
>You dream up a hundred questions to ask Anon later and another hundred for Rarity
>It does not take long for Rarity to return and she gestures for you to stand
>”This is going to be so lovely.”
“Should I go to the dressing room?”
>”Oh, no, no. This dress is far too complex to simply put on.”
>Rarity’s horn begins to glow a bright blue before you watch the dress become nothing more than a mist
>The odd magic surrounds you in a brilliant light until you feel the weight of something on your body
>You look over yourself and admire the gleam of green gems
"What a scoop! I don't think I've ever seen a spell like that before!"
>"A little something I've been perfecting for these overly intricate designs. It also saves a lot of powdering time!"
>You aren't sure what that means, but you feel like the belle of the ball in this gown
>Anon steps briskly from where ever he was hiding
>He looks to you with a bit of awe and a smile not of his own
>”Noteworthy?”
>You bat your eyes at him and coyly cover part of your mouth with a well-polished hoof
“Yes, Anon?”
>Anon seems to stumble a bit to one side before catching himself
>Dusting off his own clothing and drawing his tie straight, Anon breathes in carefully
>”You look great… W-we’ll make a staggering first impression.”
>Smiling, you prowl forward with your eyes narrowed on the tentative human
“With me on your arm?”
>Anon simply cannot speak as you invade his space and pin him with your very presence
>It feels so incredible to be in control for some reason, but you quickly allow him relief when you nuzzle his leg
>”Y-yes, exactly!”
>His hand carefully touches your mane before a voice rings out from across the room
>”Anonymous! What are you doing back here while a lady is changing?!”
>”I’m sorry, Rarity. I just had a funny feeling…”
>The perfect unicorn simply shakes her mane and sighs
>”Always a scoundrel for personal space. I have everything under control.”
>”I've never doubted you for a moment.”
>Rarity smiles quickly as she shoos Anon away and returns to you
“Thank you for everything, Miss…”
>Rarity waves a hoof and dismisses you with grand pomp in her movements
>”Please, call me Rarity, darling! Think nothing of it. I am glad that you are happy and exceptionally pleased with how you handled Anon. Make him sweat… even if sweating is ghastly on the complexion.”
>She puffs her curled mane with a hoof and smiles to you
>You trot out to see Anon standing about by the doors and casually approach
>”Note, my god, you look beautiful.”
>Rarity laughs and mockingly tuts her teeth
>”Don’t you mean, ‘-More- beautiful than usual’?”
>Anon nods without hesitation and you find yourself blushing
>How nice it feels to be fawned over, you think
>The generous unicorn walks you towards the elevator again as she converses with Anon in French
>You watch their expressions change a few times until Anon is looking a little nervous and Rarity is grinning wickedly
>A thought crosses your mind to ask Anon in the car what this conversation is all about
>"Well, darling, it has been a pleasure. Go now and showcase my beautiful new designs to the world!"
>Anon smiles at Rarity's showy display
>"Well, at any rate, the world won't see this for a few weeks."
>"Oh, this fashion will be dead and buried by then! C'est la vie, non?"
>Anon and Rarity chuckle with each other for the moment and you are certain you have never seen your friend so chummy with any person or pony before
>You enter the elevator once again with Anon and the doors close
>The trip down is just as frightful as it was coming up, but you are prepared this time
>Springing from the horrible contraption, you land on solid ground once more and wipe the sweat from your brow
>Anon has a sort of dazed smile on his face as he walks behind you
>No doubt from that other mare, you imagine
>It is a sort trip to Anon's car and you let yourself now before buckling up
>The dress makes it a bit hard to turn as the sides are a little tighter when you twist
>You breathe out to give yourself the extra inch before sitting properly again
>"Are you ready, Note?"
"As I'll ever be!"
>Anon stares at you for the moment before starting the vehicle
>"I never noticed you had your ears pierced."
"What? Oh, well, yeah. My mom did that a long time ago. I just haven't worn earrings in a while."
>"I think Rarity really outdid herself on your outfit..."
>He smiles and you know he's thinking about that perfect mare again
>You dream up what she would look like if you poured a bucket of water over her head
>Oh no, she's sexy!
>It takes a moment to push that image away
"Yes, she's very friendly with you... Maybe a little too friendly."
>A hoof rubs at your chin while you squint at Anon
>"Note, believe me when I say that our relationship was always profession. I am a doctor after all."
"I sort of know that part, I can only imagine what -things- you had to do."
>Anon looks at you with a true expression of anger and you think your joking has gone a little too far
>"She was the first Equestrian to ever visit my hospital so many years ago. It was a car accident... smashed ribs... one rib lodged into the right lung. I was a young veterinarian at the time, tasked with such emergency."
>You shrink down in your seat as Anon speaks with a ting of coldness in him
>"The operation was a success, but other doctors and myself were not sure where to begin with physical therapy. It is easy on animals... This was a different case. I lived at the hospital for months, we went through the motions until Rarity could start walking on her own."
"Anon... I'm sorry... I didn't mean to..."
>"I spent nearly a year with her and I was there to see her pain. I stopped her from giving up numerous times, even when I knew the pain was unbearable. I suppose the exposure made us closer, you could almost call it, 'love' if it were not for... -outside- interference."
"What do you mean?"
>"Princess Celestia had personally come to see Rarity. Apparently, Rarity is part of some administrative board, the Elements of Harmony, I think. The idea that something had happened to her made Celestia furious. I did my best to help her..."
>Anon's fingers begin to turn white on the wheel as he clutches it with nothing short of malice
>"I sunk a small fortune into the equipment to help her and spent every waking hour I could on Rarity's rehab. It hardly appeased her -royal- highness."
"Princess Celestia was angry at you?"
>"More than angry. I only saw Rarity for a day longer until she was taken back to Equestria. It would be two long years until I would meet her again. I was relieved, no... astonished to see how well she had healed."
"Wow... that's... That's front page stuff, Anon. But, why didn't you tell me that before?"
>"Because... It was my private moment. I don't like people seeing me like this."
>Anonymous relaxes a bit and you wish you could reach over and hug him right now
"It's OK, Anon. You don't have to tell me anything if it upsets you. I'll understand."
>He smirks a bit and sighs
>"So... anyways... do you remember what we talked about last night?"
"Of course! I will be on my best behavior and take lots of notes!"
>"Perfect... Unfortunately, we are here."
>You look out the window to find a tall building with a lot of humans and a hoof full of royal guards surrounding it
>The moment you open the door to exit, you are beset on all sides
>"Easy, you mooks, it's just me."
>Anon casually waves some badge and everything relaxes
>"This is Noteworthy, the humble columnist. She is our guest this evening."
>A human with something shiny and black in his hands reaches for a small radio and talks quickly
>"The doctor has landed, he has the package, over."
>You look at them skeptically before they allow you entrance
>Anon stands at your side and you both walk smoothly into the building
>The doors are shut behind you quickly and you find yourself in a very elegant setting
>Red and gold carpets adorn the floor and a dozen chandeliers provide light while the windows are shut tightly
>Other humans and guards and guard-humans are moving about over the floor in a hurry
>Anon doesn't seem to pay them mind as he crosses the floor
>You stare up at all the paintings and fixtures as you stumble along
>Climbing some steps to the next room, you enter to see a large table filled with humans and ponies sitting in a perfect divide from each other
>A female human in a grey suit smiles widely and waves to you
>"Anonymous, So nice of you to join us! And..."
>The woman shakes a wrist watch in the air
>"... Only thirty minutes late. This has to be your quickest arrival time to date!"
>"Nice to see you still among the -living-..."
>The room is silent as all eyes turn to the battling humans
>You spy a chair beside the table that has your name on it and you slink away to have a seat
>The chair was made with ponies in mind and the perfect proportions feel great
>Human chairs are so narrow and tall, it is a wonder anyp0ny is comfortable with them at all
>"So, we are here now, Helen. I assume you have a script for me?"
>Helen smiles sharply to Anon
>"Oh, not at all. I am sure you will know just what to say."
>The door bursts open now and startles every being in the room
>A trumpet sounds proudly before a voice rings true into the small office
>"Her majesties, Princess Celestia and Princess Luna, have arrived!"
>You spring to your hooves and bow quickly upon the sound and you see Anon and all the other ponies in the room follow your lead
>Peaking from a corner of your eye, you see that all the other humans are being quite disrespectful and just sitting around
>Princess Celestia does not show any sign of anger, but you believe she never would
>That is not how a princess acts!
>She easily walks in on her majestic hooves with her cosmic mane swirling in some invisible breeze
>You watch her walk around the side of the table where the ponies are seated and see her sit nearby Anon and yourself
>A pony of her status need not speak to impress everyp0ny, but you see the humans fidget restlessly in their seats
>Princess Luna enters the room next and, interestingly enough, she is wearing a shirt
>It is a simple kind of shirt, sky blue in color and with a neatly pressed collar for the neck
>She is not wearing pants or a skirt, however, and her cutie mark is clearly visible for all to behold
>Her trot is a little more lively, a little less dignified and she wears a bright smile
>"Greetings, denizens!"
>Princess Luna's voice rings in the small room
>Celestia wears no expression, but her eyes shift quickly to her sister
>Luna picks up her pace a bit and finds her seat beside Celestia and you sneak a glance at the two
>While Celestia is wearing her traditional royal garb, Luna has the strange humanistic shirt and her mane is bound up like a pony's tail
>Before you can dare ask a question, the doors are pulled tightly shut and a human stands at the forefront of the table
>"Welcome, everyone, we are pleased to have you gather here on such short notice."
>Princess Celestia rolls her eyes as well as most of the humans
>Helen proceeds to join the other human at the front
>"Yes, welcome ponies and people. Thank you, Princess Celestial for joining us to today..."
>The words play in your head a few times; Helen mispronounced the Princess' name!
>"We are gathered today to discuss the, 'Exchange' project. As you may be aware of, Equestrians are enjoying human cities, wealth, and culture. This program, once set forth, would allow humans the same enjoyment in Equestria."
>Princess Celestia smiles softly
>"Little girl, if you would explain in greater detail exactly how you plan to peacefully bring humans into Equestria, I would be happy to listen."
>Helen looks back at her with a false smile and you watch her motions become rigid
>"Yes, of course. Simply put, humans would travel to Equestria and take up residence within a human embassy..."
>A golden hoof taps the table and the room shakes quickly
>You are jarred a bit, but Celestia smiles calmly
>"I asked not of what you will do, but of how you will maintain peace in the docile nation of Equestria?"
>The human steadies herself on her two legs once more and looks nervously at the Princess
>You hear a small sound of a repressed laugh from Princess Luna as you look on
>"Well, as always, humans will be held accountable to the laws of Equestria, as is fair. They would also need to begin developing a stronger relationship with their fellow Equestrians."
>Princess Celestia looks at Helen with a sharp glare
>Magic fills the room quickly and some strange object appears on the table
>It is long, smells of oil and mining soiling and looks overly complex like most human-held objects
>Princess Luna sits upright in her seat with a smile on her face
>"This is a recovered device used in Equestria by the first scouting party of humans ever to set foot upon Equestrian soil. It is know as an M-240 machine gun. It can fire nearly 1,000 bullets per minute with an effective range of 800 meters!"
>Celestia raises a hoof for her sister to stop
>You were kind of getting interested in whatever this, "machine gun" is and what it's used for
>The answer comes swiftly from Princess Celestia and you suddenly wish you didn't know
>"27 slain in a matter of seconds. Six were foals..."
>An eerie quietness fills the room before a few ponies on one side weep or say last rites
>You feel tears coming on until Anon's hand wraps around your hoof
>He looks to you and you stare back into his warm face and feeling eyes
>Celestia looks around the room once and then back to Helen
>"I have no reason to allow another human into my nation when lives are at stake. Had my sister not been there that night, that small, peaceful community would have been destroyed."
>Helen quickly tries to make some sort of statement while Celestia looks on
>"I understand what you must have felt, I know it was a terrible thing to happen. I assure you that humans are not all like that. It was a mistake of our military in, what was assumed, hostile territory."
>There is a sudden ruckus from both humans and ponies now in the small room and allegations are flung from side to side
>With a flash of brilliant light, the whole room settles down again
>Celestia stands up tall and begins walking towards the door
>"Another fine waste of time... Come, dearest sister."
>Helen reaches her hands up in the air
>"Wait! Just one moment! I have proof!"
>Luna halts first, but Celestia takes a few more steps before stopping
>They do not speak, but simply nod in return
>Helen calls upon Anon now and he looks a little more than nerves
>His hand slips from your hoof slowly as he stands up and you follow him if only to show your support
>"Princess Celestia..."
>She turns her head back to look at him
>"Anonymous..."
>Princess Luna smiles a little and repeats
>"Anonymous!"
>Celestia turns her self about to face Anon now and Helen seems to relax as bit
>"You, Dr. Anonymous, had saved the life of one of my dear ponies and you, Dr. Anonymous, had also been her reason for being imprisoned on Earth for so long."
>"I assure you, madame, that I was unaware of your magic when I first met Generosity."
>Something in the way Anon says the word causes Princess Celestia to step forward and pin her ears
>For the first time in your young life, you see an expression that you never thought the Princess was capable of
>"She has told you?"
>"Yes, everything about the E.O.H. and about her role in your world. Rarity is my friend, a dear friend, and there is nothing I wouldn't do for her. We have spent much time together and, dare I say, learned a lot from both worlds."
>Princess Luna slides beside her sister and smiles
>"Sister, it is clear that this particular human has had a particular way with ponies. Would you not agree?"
>"What do you mean, Luna?"
>Luna chuckles
>"Have you truly been so blinded with your irritation that you have looked over the shining star sitting at Anonymous' side?"
>Celestia scowls for a moment, but slowly, her face returns to her calm nature
>"A keen eye, dear sister..."
>The princess stares at you for the moment, but her eyes pierce much deeper
>She looks up in a bit of shock as she realizes just who you are
>"Noteworthy? I am sorry, but I did not recognize you. It is good to see you looking so well with your time here."
>You feel a sense of love and joy you cannot quite explain
>It is the feeling you get when your mother says, "I love you" or when you find an amazing story for the papers
>Joy overcomes you and you try your best to calmly rush before your Princess
>Just being near her is warming and peaceful and you kneel pleasantly
"Princess, it is a pleasure to see you! Thank you for allowing me to take my vacation here in the first place."
>"Oh my, this meeting is interrupting your vacation?"
"Oh, no, not at all! Any meeting with you, your majesty, is always wonderful to attend!"
>She smiles to you and your heart thumps with happiness
>Princess Luna walks to you and smirks
>"Have you been enjoying yourself, little one?"
"Oh, yes, Anon has been so awesome. We have done so many fun things and eaten so much fantastic food and it's just been the best week ever so far."
>Celestia listens to you carefully before looking to Anonymous
>She seems to swallow a lump in her throat before speaking
>"Can you explain further?"
"Better than that, Princess! Let me show you..."
>You look to one solid, white wall and charge your magic
>In an instant, a week's worth of memories appear on the wall from your perspective
>An image of the first day appears with you two eating pizza, then that night as you lay beside Anon watching the film, "Ghost Busters"
>You try to skip over the part where you watch Anon's shapely bum swimming in his pool, but it stills plays through
>Luna chuckles a bit and Celestia seems concerned
>You begin to tire from just that much, however, the Princess demands further evaluation
>She lays her horn upon yours and in a moment, you are supercharged with pure magic
>More of the memories spill themselves upon the canvas as you show what you have scene
>A driving scene appears with Anon at the wheel and your favorite song playing
>Celestia's magic fades as she stands to her full height again
>You see her mouth trying to react with some expression, but you feel she cannot find one
>"I could feel it... Everything you had felt. Noteworthy, do you... Do you truly feel these things for Anonymous?"
>Blush spreads over your muzzle as you are singled out in front of all these ponies and humans
"Y-yeah, I mean... They're my feelings, right? I must have felt them..."
>Luna looks to her sister with a bit of concern
>"Are you alright, Celestia?"
>"Yes, I am going to be fine. I have come to a conclusion..."
>All eyes are on the Princess now as the room awaits a verdict
>"It has come to my attention that humans, as a whole, as untrustworthy, dangerous beings who are not fit to live in Equestrian society."
>Helen's face twists into something purely demented
>Before she is allowed a word, Celestia continues
>"However, there are... rare exceptions. Before humanity is permitted access to the bounty of Equestria, a thorough investigation must be undertaken to determine just -who- I allow into my borders."
>The humans clamor amongst themselves before a male human in a camouflaged outfit pipes up
>"What is the criteria for access to Equestria?"
>Princess Luna smiles
>"May I, dearest sister?"
>Celestia nods carefully
>"To be allowed into Equestria, one must understand the fundamental building blocks of society."
>The man in camouflage speaks distrustfully
>"And what are the fundamentals of society to you?"
>Luna shoots Celestia a glance and both of them speak in sync
>"Love, harmony, and friendship. This is the way of Equestria."
>The humans on one side scratch their collective heads and look to each other like they are being fooled while the ponies all simply nod to each other
>A bookish looking woman stands up and addresses Princess Celestia as neatly as one should
>"Princess, I have been in charge of studying Equestrian history and law for the past six years now and I have not come across any passage about these essential principles."
>Celestia nods slowly before turning her gaze upon the humans
>"It is ingrained in our ways and embedded into our culture. A pony is born with love in their hearts for all things and instilled with values so old that it is as natural as breathing. You would never need to write a detailed report on something so natural as harmony."
>The woman nods a bit as if processing this information
>At once, the room focuses on you as a loud burble escapes from your tummy
>You chuckle quickly
"We, um... We missed breakfast and lunch today. I-is anyp0ny else hungry, heh?"
>You hear murmurs around the room before the Princess herself steps up
>"Little Noteworthy, you have shown me a great deal of new information today. I wish to partake in a slice of pizza, if Anonymous would kindly show us the way?"
>Luna looks awestruck for the moment at her sister
>"-You- wish to walk amongst the humans? Eat their food? Are you feeling yourself, dear sister?"
>"Yes, I am fine... But, this room is stuffy. We should conduct all meetings outside from now on..."
>The princess looks to Helen with a sharp stare
>"... Wouldn't you agree?"
>"What? Oh, yes, of course! Outside, right."
>Helen seems both confused and distraught while Anon smiles onward
>Princess Luna smiles widely to her sister before a spark of magic crackles from her horn
>A deeply yellow shirt appears and floats idly in Luna's magical grip
>"I have even hoof picked this shirt for just such occasion!"
>Princess Celestia looks at the shirt with a worried expression, but you carefully explain the idea of clothing
"It would be a really good thing for you, Princess, to just try on the shirt, you know?"
>Celestia looks on for a while longer before approaches the article of clothing
>The room is silent as she slides her horn and head into the dark space and reappears out of the neck
>Her golden hooves slowly fit into the sleeves and at once, you hear a collective sigh of relief
>The Princess' face twists through a few expression until she decides on a smile
>"It is... comfortable."
>The ponies and Anonymous cheer quickly and most praise Celestia for her triumph
>A snort can be heard from the human side of the table, but otherwise, they are friendly enough
>You see Anon punch the shoulder of the human in camouflage quickly and they exchange a glance
>Anonymous next proceeds to Princess Celestia and speaks coolly
>"I know of a beautiful place that is far enough from prying eyes. We could eat and delegate there, if you so wish?"
>Celestia smiles a true smile to Anon
>"May I?"
>He looks to you and you nod back
>"Um, yes?"
>The Princess places her horn against Anon's forehead slowly and you see a jolt of energy surge through the pair
>Anon stumbles a little and Helen rushes to him
>"Interesting..."
>He looks a little tired suddenly and Celestia thanks Anon for his cooperation
>"Sister, I will need your magic for this as well."
>Helen looks to the princess and then to the woozy Anon
>"What? What do you need more magic for? What's going on?"
>"Anonymous has so kindly given me the directions and you said yourself that you want to avoid attention. We will travel to this garden I have seen and finish this meeting then."
>The whole room is just about at the same level of confusion, so it is not hard to corral them all
>"Luna, dear sister, follow my lead."
>You watch Celestia raise her horn before the pull of immense energy tugs at your very being
>"Relax, little ones..."
>Celestia's voice is calm and cool
>The Princess of the Night begins charging her own magic now and you watch the tips of the princess' horns touch
>An odd mixture of brilliant darkness engulfs you and the world seems to freeze and fade away
>This feels not unlike the portal you first took to Earth days ago
>A green tint glazes over the background and then a red and finally a blue until color is restored to the world
>Looking around, you find yourself and the group in a lush green place with grass under your hooves and trees all around you
>The scent of fragrant flowers drifts on the cool wind around you
>You look for Celestia, but notice she is not around
"Princess Luna, where are we?"
>"We are in a place known as New York on Earth."
"Still? But, where did all this come from? I have been on Earth for nearly a week and never seen anything like this!"
>"I am not exactly sure where we are in terms of full geography, but this is where my sister thought of in her spell."
"So, where is Princess Celestia... For that matter, where's Anon?"
>Luna and yourself look around for a bit before shrugging and looking to the group of ponies and humans standing about

>In a stuffy boardroom
>Be Anonymous
>You look around as the others quickly vanish, but you are not certain why you are still standing here
>The princess glides about you for a moment before you realize you are alone with her
>"Anonymous the human..."
"Yes, princess?"
>"I must have words with you."
"Can you... stop pacing around me? It makes me a little nervous."
>Celestia stops at once before you and stares into your eyes
>She is nearly your height if you don't count her long horn and the feeling of being so near to a tall pony is an oddity
>"Noteworthy had shown me a good deal of her adventures and I am relieved to see how well you have taken care of her. There is something that puzzles me, however. Ponies who live in this strange place do not usually retain such levels of pureness like those of Equestria. What did you do?"
"I did nothing, but be a gracious host. As I have always done and you have never believed. For a talking, flying, magical-laser-beam horse, you are exceptionally insular about me."
>"Insular? Me? Never! I worry about my ponies everyday that your world remains present. I have seen the destruction your kind can cause with minimal effort and..."
>The princess turns from you and walks slowly towards a window
"And what? What are you afraid of?"
>"... And I am -afraid- I cannot keep my little ponies safe. You know of the Elements of Harmony, they are the living spirits of Equestria whom act as a last line of defense against threats."
>You think about what Rarity had told you, but never really understood the magnitude of it all
"You... You don't think that -I- am causing Rarity to spend so much time on Earth, right?"
>"I allow her to come and go as she pleases. She truly loves this place, it keeps her mind busy."
>Carefully inching towards the princess, you meet her by the window and watch the sun setting over the city
"It's funny, you know?"
>Celestia cranes her neck and looks to you
>"What is?"
"I have lived in this town my whole life and I will probably die here. But, damn, if I have ever just taken time to watch a sunset. It's beautiful, right?"
>The princess smiles and laughs lowly
>"I suppose I have seen many in my time. It feels strange to not be monitoring the sun."
"That's good, in my opinion. You can just sit back and enjoy it for a while..."
>The Princess looks to you for a moment with a curious grin before looking back through the window
>"I think I understand why she is so smitten with you now..."
>You turn and raise your eyebrows quickly
"Rarity and I have a very professional..."
>A golden hoof silences you quickly
>"Not Generosity, Anonymous. Surely, you have seen the way Noteworthy eyes you?"
>You brush a hand through your hair and try to focus on the sunset again
"Well, yes and no. Noteworthy and I have been pen pals for as long as I can think back and meeting in the flesh has been incredible. She is just as smart, funny, witty and kind as she appeared in the mail."
>"But, you have your doubts, I can tell."
>You laugh and ask in a joking manner
"It's not like you'd give me the go-ahead to actually date one of your ponies, ha ha."
>Celestia turns to you with a very serious expression
>"Why not? After all, even I am not powerful enough to stop two souls in love."
>Your blood freezes in your veins as the dominant Princess of the Sun looks through you
>"You -do- feel what she feels, don't you?"
"Of course! Probably! Why, what did Note say?"
>Celestia smiles and turns back to the twilight sky
>"I think you know better than I. You are interesting, Anonymous. I believe you fully when you act this surprised, yet I know you are so much more observant than that."
>You sigh and rest your body against the wall
"Did you want to talk to me about anything particular since we are still alone?"
>"I do, yes, but I also just want your opinion. You seem like the finest human that I deal with and it is a shame that you govern so little in your world."
"I'd probably be a terrible person had I ever been made president."
>"No... No, I don't believe you. Your heart beats so purely and with too much passion. It is as if you want for your goals so badly that you would put yourself last to see them fulfilled."
>You nod, not entirely sure if Celestia is reading you correctly or if you are downplaying your own values
>"It is unfair how readily humans have accepted ponies. They are a species who can so easily integrate with an ever changing world."
"I think ponies have been doing a good job assimilating on Earth."
>"It is true and many who return to Equestria tell stories of the fast paced world. This city is not for everyp0ny, but the few who do stay simply adore it."
>The hum of electricity picks up in your ears as the overhead lights begin to turn on
>Your little room is illuminated at once as night descends on the city
>Streetlamps flicker to life and headlights dot the street, but nothing slows in the darkness
>"A thought exercise, if you would?"
"Go on."
>"What can change the nature of a human?"
>You look at Celestia and bob your head a few times in thought
>She looks back to you with her ears standing tall
"In my experience? Nothing short of death... It is a bad answer, I suppose, but what can change the nature of anyone?"
>"That is just about the answer I had expected. It has taken me some time, but I think I enjoy your presence, Anonymous. You are very... What is the word, 'Genuine'?"
"I should take that as a compliment. Truth be told, I suppose I don't mind being in your company."
>You laugh a relieved laugh as you look to her
"Would you believe I was out of my mind when I heard you would be here? Crazy, I know, but we haven't always been able to just talk."
>"I will be calling on you again, Anonymous... You may be just the human to solve my dilemma. For now, let us gather the pizza and return to our waiting group."
>You had forgotten about the pizza and everyone else and your eyes narrow
"The pizzeria is like 45 minutes across town and that's another hour or so from our meeting place. You did send everyone to our meeting place, right?"
>"I did and fear not. Time is not -my- master."
"OK, great, so, teleportation, correct?"
>"I would prefer such methods of travel, but alas, the city is too dense for such methods. We will have to hoof it, as it were."
"Walking eleven blocks is certainly not going to keep you undercover."
>"Forgive me, I did not mean actually walking..."
>The windows open under Celestia's power and you see her ruffle her wings once
"Hah, OK, you got me, excellent joke..."
>"I am not joking about this. Now, please hop on my back."
"You are a little small for a riding horse."
>"Do not mistake my physical size for weakness."
"I wasn't, I'm just really kind of nervous about this whole situation right now."
>Celestia smiles sharply
>"So, the great Anonymous is averse to flying. This is -news- fit for the papers."
"Oh, you are something else when you're -friends- with someone."
>Celestia spreads her wings and smiles again as the air around her takes on a fragrant scent
>"The wind feels so lovely here; we should be moving soon."
>You sigh heavily and walk towards her
>Her body is very warm as you place one hand against her flank and look under her raised wing
"Are you absolutely sure?"
>She simply nods to you before you hoist yourself onto her back
>To your surprise, she does not strain or even so much as grunt as you mount up
>"I advise you to hold onto me. Please do not pull at my mane."
>A few interesting thoughts cross your mind about the phrase and you chuckle lightly
>Your hands grip into the princess' sides as she steps to the window
>With one graceful beat of her wings, you are suddenly hurting through the air
>The world is a blur as buildings speed by and a yellow trail, not unlike the tail of a comet, wicks from your form
>When you can finally see again, you find yourself standing before Mario's restaurant
>"There we are, this is the correct location if memory serves me right."
"I... You... That..."
>"Impressed by such a small measure of my strength?"
>You dust yourself off quickly and try to look nonchalant about it all
"Let me order a few pies. I am sure the others will be famished..."

>In a lovely garden
>Be Noteworthy the Clever
>You and a few other ponies find a great deal to eat at this garden party
>Who knew Anon had such good taste in food?
"So, mhm, you think the princess and Anon got lost?"
>A pegasus with a proper looking tie and hat shrugs back to you in between a bite of some clover
>"I'm sure, mmm, that they, mhmhm, are just fine."
>The humans look on to you while your lot grazes pleasantly
>You had tried to offer them first dibs on the choicest selection of greens, but to no avail
>Sometimes, humans are simply suckers!
>Princess Luna cranes her neck over to some sweet smelling flowers and nibbles lightly
>"Anonymous has offered us quite the variety. Truly delectable! I do wish that Celestia would return soon for I know she is starving."
>As if fate would have it, you see a yellow something speeding through the air
>It whips about as it nears the ground and finally lands with a soft thud
>All eyes turn to see the form of the regal Celestia in all her glory with Anonymous sitting smartly on her back
>Luna chokes and her eyes go wide in surprise as Anon hops down
>"S-sister?!"
>"Hello, Luna, have you been keeping the peace?"
>Luna stands dumbfounded for a while longer as Anon brandishes a few boxes
>"Sorry for the delay, but we got here as soon as we could."
>The humans rush to him and he hands over two boxes
>One remains in his hand as he approaches you and the smell from the box quickly makes your mouth water
>"My dear, Note, I hope I didn't keep you too long?"
"Oh no, I had a bit of an appetizer while we waited."
>Anon looks at you with a sort of smile for the moment before presenting you with the box in his hand
>Opening it revels what you already smelled, a delicious pizza topped with mushrooms, tomatoes, onions, bell peppers, and spinach
>You let go a sigh of utter bliss as you inhale the perfect aroma of a masterfully created meal
"It's what sweet dreams are made of! If only I had..."
>Without finishing the sentence, Anon produces a frosty can of Coke from his jacket with a bendy straw to compliment
"I... I love you..."
>"I know, Note. I know."
>You lay on the grass beside Anon and shovel down pizza and guzzle your Coke
>Today was a load of fun, you reflect
>Celestia raises to her hooves as the others sit and eat and her voices rings out
>"Everyp0ny, I have come to a conclusion..."
>Helen looks up carefully
>"What? We didn't even talk about the terms?"
>"As ruler of Equestria, I hereby decree that the human, Anonymous, shall henceforth be granted complete access to the borders of Equestria and may experience the wonders of equinity and take back with him all lessons he may learn for all of humanity to share."
>Helen stands to her feet and scowls
>"And where does that leave the rest of humanity?"
>Celestia smiles an amusing smile
>"I am granting Anonymous the ability to decide upon who may enter my fair nation."
>Anon turns to her with worried eyes
>"You are?"
>"I am."
>He scrunches his nose quickly
>"But, how would I find time to perform my duties on Earth?"
>The princess smiles widely before looking to her sister
>"I will assign you an adviser. Somep0ny trustworthy and praiseworthy and, above all, thankworthy. The new advisor for this agenda will be the columnist, Noteworthy."
>You cough up some soda and bubbles invade your nose
"M-me?"
>"Yes, dearest Noteworthy. You have made me realize I did not give these creatures a chance, but that I am not suited for such a task. You will decide such crucial matters in my stead."
"So... So, I am going to have to stay here longer, right?"
>You ask in the most journalistic way you can as your eyes light up in excitement
>"Yes, exactly. I was thinking we could give you a home in the upper part of the city..."
>Celestia pauses for dramatic effect and you stare at her intensely
>"... Or, Anonymous could offer his residence to you."
>Anon looks to Celestia with a silly grin before nodding
>"My home is your home, Note. For as long as you wish to stay."
>The human Helen turns red in the face as she points at Celestia
>"How can you just give such powers to someone we don't even know?! She won't even be an official resident until the country allows her in."
>Celestia nods carefully
>"This is very true. We can bide our time and continue to deny almost all human interaction in Equestria."
>Helen's face sinks at her own threat and Anon smiles
>"My, my, this has been a productive meeting of minds. Well, I do hope we see each other soon."
>You smile as Anon takes hold of your hoof
>"Hmm, I think this calls for a little champagne to celebrate. Are you ready to head home, dear -advisor-?"
"You bet, -boss-!"
>The two of you giggle like idiots as you begin to walk away
"We should definitely watch a movie tonight."
>"Definitely! And in the morning, I am making French toast."
>Anon slides around your body and hugs tightly
>His hands rest around your shapely bottom and you feel a little embarrassed
>"Love... Yeah, you're easy to love."
>In a moment of burning passion, you feel your body pulled towards the beautiful lips of Anon and you are kissed lovingly
>You can do nothing, save for melt under his expert mouth
>The eyes of everyp0ny and human tracks you two until you hear a laugh from Princess Luna
>"Dearest sister, I am not sure what has come over you, but I like it indeed!"
>"I haven't changed my mind about humans, baby sister, but I can't be an insular, old mare either."
>Luna smiles
>"You? Insular? Never!"
>"That is what -I- said as well!"
>The royal sisters laugh with each other quickly before they begin to walk off towards a clearing
>"Anonymous... Take care of my little ponies while they reside on Earth. I would do no less for your fellow humans."
>Anon nods with a warm grin
>You beam too, more so about the fact that Anon is learning to get along with the princess than anything
>"You have my word and... You have my thanks."
>They exchange a quick nod before the princesses disappear into the night
>A human hand caresses your mane and neck
"Hey, Anon... You any good at back rubs? This dress is tight in all the wrong places..."
>You grin and a human hand glides down your back
>"We have a lot of time to practice now. I'm a pretty quick study."
>This new life seems a bit daunting, but you are certain Anon will make it the best
>He always does