Thread 41: Stories 61-75

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>Luna
"AJ"
~~~

>WE HAVE ANOTHER IDEA!

"Extortion is still illegal."

>NEVERMIND!

"...Startin' ta' see why Celly didn't stop her a'fore she went all bonkers. Some time off ain't soundin' too bad."
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>AJ
"Pinkie"
~~~~~

>So, what're ya' gonna do now that Partyland got wrecked?

"Oh, you know, suddenly become another species, meet up with an unlikely race, have a series of comedic events and then slowly get pushed into the background as other, slightly more interesting characters go up to the forefront before eventually doing stuff."

>...What?

"GIMME YOUR WINGS!"

>PINKIE NO!
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>AJ
"Mane-Iac"
~~~~~~

>Applejack.

"MISS MAREVELOUS!"

>Applejack.

"MISS MAREVELOUS!"

>Aaaaaapppllleeee... Jaaaaaccckkk....

"MIIISSSSS.... MAAAARRREEEVELOUS!"

>Are ya' doin' this deliberately?

"DOING WHAAAAAAAT!?"

>Ah...

"...Yes."

>What was that?

"NOOOOTTHIIIIIING!"
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>AJ
"Rarity"
~~~~~

>...huh.

"What?"

>It's jus... weren't ya' tryin' ta spend some time with Spike back at Partyland?

"Wha...OH FUCK!"

>...It still counts.

"IT DOES NOT!"

>Does so.

"Did you Wingpony for me?"

>Well, no, but-

"Then it doesn't count!"

>...Yes it-

"If you were sentencing this as a judge, what would it be? GO!"

>...Dang it.

"HA HA! TECHNICALITIES!"

>...Dang it.
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>Applejack
“Celestia”
‘DT’
-???-
_______

>AAAAAAAAAAAHH!

“AAAAAAAAAAAH!”

‘…what?’

>GAAAAAAAAH!

“YAAAAAAAAAH”

‘You two keep looking at that damn slip of paper like it’s about to steal your soul. Is that why you called me? I could hear your screaming all the way up in the Gun room, you kn-’

>“AAAAAAAAAAHHHH!”

‘Oh for the love of- JUST GIVE ME THE FREAKING NOTICE ALREADY! … …Really? This is what’s got your freakishly big plots in a twist?’

-Don’t be jealous, flatflank! Plot envy makes your butt smaller!-

‘SHUT UP! Anyway, back to you screaming sissies, what’s the big deal? I mean, yeah, that’s a lot of zeroes but daddy only hires the best, you know. Not to mention he had to pay extra for a speedy service.'

>THERE ARE ZEROES LITERALLY FALLIN’ OFF THE PAPER!

“LOOK AT THE PILE! LOOK AT IT!”

‘Tch, get over it. You’re just lucky daddy decided to do this for free. And he made you an extra helping of brownies to boot. So here's what I suggest you do, I suggest you thank Faust above, close your jaws, and eat some cake. While I go slap a certain bug upside the chin.’

-Hopefully not with that rock you call a butt, you’d probably shatter my jaw!-

‘YOU JUST CAN’T APPRECIATE IT YOU IDIOT!’

-I can appreciate the fact that I’m not lawfully required to be in the same room with it, yeah.-

A hue of golden magic pulled open a nearby drawer, and from it flew two saucers of pre-made cake that made its way to the princesses, both of whom began eating while watching the younger ones fight.

>Why do Ah feel like we oughta be recordin’ moments like these?

“Because every moment here is golden.”

>Well said, Celly.
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>Applejack
"Spike"

>Howdy, Spike, how're you doing?

"I'm fine, Mistress Marevellous"

>Oh don't you start this, It's hard enough with Maney yellin' it, it's only a matter of time till Chrysalis pulls it as well on me

"P'shawww, it fitted you just fine, heck, you shoulda gone to the cosplay thing in that"

>And stood next to you? In that frilly thing?

"Wha-who told you?"

>...Next to near everypony, to be frank

"Well I don't see how much an issue it was!"

>Ha!

"Okay then, how about a deal: I pull the "frilly thing" dress for a day, then you have to get Rarity to make YOU wear a full Mistress Marevellous costume for a full day"

>Woah woah woah now, I can't go around lookin' like that!

"Too bad, I'm going to get that dress on, and you can't stop me!"

>Oh I certainly can!

"I don't see any slips of paper saying you can't"

>Well where's the bill saying I hafta? Can't pass that by me!

"....Take a look"

>I-..."signed by order Princess Appl-"

"RIGHT UNDER YOUR NOOOOOooooooose!-"

>...That dirty lizard...
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>SA
“Dash”
~~~~

>What would I do without that portal?

Before, it would have taken DAYS for him to get this filled out from Rainbow Dash. He would have had to mail his request to her, wait for her to reply, then replied back over what would likely take two weeks. But now? He could just pop over and hand it right off.

>Yep, doing good-

The door abruptly slammed open, revealing a very irritated looking Wonderbolt, the one Shining Armor recognized as Fleetfoot. From the looks on her face, whatever had gone down in there had not been pretty, but she still mustered up a professional salute before she moved aside, let him in and shut the door behind him. Little professional, at least.

>What was that all about?

The rainbow maned mare just growled, and slammed her head against her desk.

“What else? Me threatening her over her insubordination, her getting out of it on a freaking technicality, and the cycle continues.”

He cocked an eyebrow, setting the forms on the desk in fronts of her, completely ignoring her growl of annoyance.

>That doesn't sound like a very healthy commander-subordinate relationship.

“Hey, what a surprise, it's not. But I can't disbar her yet. She TECHNICALLY was acting within reason to see if it was safe to evacuate off Partyland, and her efforts did supply vital information that otherwise could have ended badly if we had attempted without it. Someone besides her could have gotten hurt.”

>Sounds like she did a good job, in that case. And her doing it so openly not only told you, but everyone. Heck, I was planning that very thing when I saw her light up the sky.

Angrily, she slammed a hoof on the desk.

“But she didn't do it to help anyone, she did it because she's a freaking coward and was trying to run! She was this close to leaving all of us in the dust!”

>But she didn't, and her actions didn't make your organization look bad, quite the opposite.

“Who cares about how we look!? This is about whether or not she's being a WONDERBOLT!”

He watched her catch her breath for a while, and gave an understanding nod.

>So, you think being a wonderbolt means being brave?

“Of course! That's, like, the whole point! That's the core of what being a Wonderbolt IS! If you don't have the guts to look danger in the face, you shouldn't be wearing that uniform!”

>Huh, I thought they were mostly about performing airshows-OW!

Completely ignoring the fact she had just assaulted a foreign dignitary with a book, she continued.

“That's not what we're supposed to be! That's not how we're supposed to act! We're supposed to be the bravest, coolest, fastest fliers in the whole wide world! We're supposed to be the best! That's what the Wonderbolt's were MADE FOR!”

>Ah, no. You're wrong.

“WHAT!?”

>They were made to help ponies, not look good or be brave.

She froze, her eyes going almost comically wide as she stared at him.

>Look, Dash. This way you're going about this? This is all wrong. Tell me, has Fleetfoot ever shown she doesn't want to help anyone?

“...Well, no, I mean I guess nothing THAT bad.”

>Dash, I'm going to give you the best advice I ever learned as a commander and I want you to hold onto this. You listening? Okay... they all wear the same uniform and a lot of them look alike, but I assure you underneath that every single one, EVERY single one, is different. You will never find two soldiers who are the same, and that's fine.

He levitated the book she had tossed back onto her desk, neatly placing it where it should be.

>Maybe Fleetfoot isn't the most brave, or courageous, but that doesn't mean she's a bad wonderbolt, it means that there are problems with her you need to work on, problems you can fix.

She scoffed, looking away.

“How can I do that when nobody freaking respects me?”

>Do they not?

“NO! It's an uphill battle with them! Every single time I try to make a request they question my every move! Everybody thinks I just got this job because I know the princesses. Which is baloney, I'm the fastest flier in Equestria! I leave seasoned wonderbolts in the dust, and yet somehow I'm not worthy? I mean, did you have to deal with this when you took over?”

>Constantly.

“...Really?”

>Oh yeah. Didn't matter how many times I proved I could wield my shield spells on a whole other level from them, everyone just kind of latched onto the fact I was dating the royal niece, and everyone was sure I was extra special 'good friends' with Celestia, if you catch my drift. They were sure I banged my way to the top. Questioned every move, downright disobeyed me at times. Made life a pain.

“...Huh.”

>But Dash, that's no way for someone to lead an organization. I wish I could go back and tell past-me this... among a LOT of other things... but if they don't respect you, if you can't get them to listen to you, it's going to be a problem. The whole thing is going to suffer.

“Well, what can I do?”

>That's a question, I'm afraid, you'll have to ask them.

“Oh come on!”

>Sorry, it's the truth. I don't know what it would take for Spitfire to think you're worthy of the title, and I sure don't know what Fleetfoot could want from you.

“...Probably wants me to let her sell some more dang drugs...”

>Wait, what!?

“Can't prove it, sadly.”

>Uh... huh. Well, point is, if you want the respect of the Wonderbolts, ask them. I couldn't do that back in the day, as asking every single soldier would take forever, but you have a... smaller crew, so to speak.

“Putting it mildly.”

>So, work with it. Get personal, get individual. You're a great flier, Dash, you're one of the bravest ponies out there and you'll probably save the world a dozen more times before you decide to let someone else take the reigns, but maaaybe you still need a bit more work being a leader. They can help you, you know.

She sat in silence, idly tapping her hoof on the desk.

>Just... think about what I said, okay? Trust me, I've been there, I know what it's like, and if you need anymore help I'll be happy to provide it. Okay?

“...Thanks, Shining.”

He smiled, giving her an understanding nod before turning to the door.

>Good luck, Dash. You can pull this off, I'm sure of it. Just takes some time.

As soon as the door closed, she let out the sigh she had been holding, and leaned back far into her chair.

“If I could talk to MY past me, I'd suggest taking up soccer or something...”

Her face suddenly scrunched up in disdain.

“Nevermind, that's stupid. Still...”

She looked over to the desk, where the current paycheck forms for all of her 'many' wonderbolts remained.

“...Maybe just talking couldn't hurt.”

She grabbed one at random.

“What's the worst that could happen?”
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>Dash
"AJ"
'Rarity'
~~~~~

>With your legs, AJ! Help your steering with your legs!

"SHADDUP! AH'M DOIN' IT!"

>You are hovering in place.

"IT'S HARD!"

'Really, darling, it's not so bad!'

"HOW ARE YA'LL SO GOOD AT THIS!?"

'I just think happy, wonderful thoughts, and up I go!'

"Really?"

>NO! AJ, do not listen to her! She will lead you astray! Thinking happy things leads you to thinking of OTHER things and before you know it you are REALLY thinking about those other things to an unhealthy level and you will NEVER LIVE DOWN THE SHAME!

"..."
'...Ew.'

>Wha? Ew? Why... OH NO! NO NO NO! I MEANT I CRASHED! I WAS TALKING ABOUT THE WHOLE 'Rainbow Crash' THING! NOT THAT!

'Secrets out, darling.'

>THAT NEVER HAPPENED YOU SHUT UP!

"Oh yeah, and what're ya' gonna do iffin we do-"

~~~~~~~~

>...So... things got a little out of hoof. But I feel like this was a learning experience, really. I feel like we three, as friends, will grow closer because of this. We are going to be better for it, I assure you.

"..."
'...'

>...Just as soon as your legs point in the right direction again, and all of the feathers grow back. Nurse Redheart says the internal bleeding wasn't even all that bad. Heh, lucky we landed in Ponyville, right? Would've been bad if we had still been in Canterlot, their pegasi care sucks...

"..."
'...'

>...yeah... lucky lucky yellow ducky... yeah...
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Pommel's muscles were burning as he sprinted towards the walls, every fiber of his being pushing himself forward to the sounds of steel on steel coming from beyond, the boom of cannons being fired, the shrill yelps of pain. Rat and Reel ran beside him, Doc bringing up the rear, their hoofsteps slowly losing volume to the din of battle.

"So when we get there, what the hell are we going to do!?" Rat asked, watching as a cannonball sailed over the top of the wall and collided with a great golden spire.

"You and Doc do whatever Evergreen tells you," Pommel answered, "Reel and I need to get to get as high as we can to make sure the guys in the tower recognize it's a signal and not just some random shot."

"Wha-me!?" Reel blanched, "Why do I need to come along?!"

"Because if I bite it, someone has to give the signal," Pommel didn't bother glancing at him, "Provided the red bastard doesn't realize I'm dead and decides to cut its losses."

"Why not me?" Rat raised an eyebrow, "I'm better at fighting than this twerp!"

"Exactly," Pommel grinned, "You'll be more useful in the fight than being a glorified messenger boy like me and Reel!"

"Heh, point," Rat smirked, "Either way, try not to die, eh? Because I'm pretty sure Daw herself would kill me if that happened!"

"Duly noted!" Pommel's horn glowed, drawing his sword from its sheath, "Get ready, we're getting clo-WHOA!"

The quartet were stopped in their tracks as a eyepatch-clad goat smashed into the ground before them, bleating in pain before a blue blur crashed down onto it like a predatory bird, silencing it decisively.

Daw adjusted her bandanna and nodded to the stallions, "Lad, Rat, Gag, Doc, glad t'see ya could make it. Where's Shoals'n th' rest?"

"No time to really explain, but I got a plan," Pommel stepped forward, nodding to her, "I need to get as high as I can on this wall..."

His eyes caught sight of a guard tower, thankfully not hit by any of the barrages of cannon fire.

>>19740212
"That'll do," He pointed at it, "Rat and Doc can help with the battle but Reel and I gotta get up there!"

Daw's eyes went back to the melee on the walls, the writhing forms of a great many combatants swinging swords, axes, harpoons, and in the case of a rather muscular Diamond Dog, a cannon wrenched from its wooden casing.

"Pommel," Daw looked back to the four stallions, "We can't spare th' men to get you up there by flight, if we do Brahmos' men will swarm us, you're going to have to run there yourself!"

"Figured that was going to be the case," Pommel nodded, "Reel and I'll get up there as quick as we can, you guys just try not to die-ow!"

Pommel rubbed his head as Daw smirked, pulling him into an embrace with the same hoof she'd used to smack him in the back of the head, whispering into his ear, "That's my line ya gobshite. You two be careful, and I mean that."

"We will, and we're going to win this fight," Pommel gave her a kiss on the cheek, "Now get out there and kick their asses."

"Ha, lad ya know th' words that just set me heart a flutter," She grinned at Doc and Rat, "Right you two, you know where yer needed, get to it!"

Rat grinned and drew his knife, bounding upwards onto a staircase to the top of the golden walls, ready to join the fray. Doc grumbled something about a lack of 'sanitary instruments' but was quickly en route to gather what he could from his cabin. Daw spared a glance back at Pommel, a small nod of encouragement, before taking off to rejoin the battle.

Pommel looked to Reel, "Alright, follow me!"

Pommel took off at a sprint, trying to get the two of them to a section of the wall not embroiled in swordplay as Reel followed behind, nervousness emanating from every pore of the amateur pirate's body as they began to ascend a set of stairs farther from the fighting.

"I hope you know what you're doing with all this!" Reel said a quiver in his voice.

"Did you guys just make that the phrase of the day?" Pommel asked, of course inside, his mind was awash with thoughts that only helped Reel's point, he'd made a deal with something that could pass for one of Discord's weekend poker buddies to take down a minotaur that would take the few friends he'd had in this Faust forsaken ocean and hang their corpses on the walls of the City along with his own. Hell, he didn't have a gurantee that what the thing in the gem was going to do was going to work, for all he knew Brahmos would blast it to pieces and that would be that, game over.

And yet he kept going, awash with purpose, his every step one measure of distance closer to the critical moment that would kick the creature's plan into motion. There were parts of himself that questioned if this was really him, really Bronze Pommel, the lanky little moron that was set for a life as a dungeon guard until he befriended a pariah among his race. These parts reprimanded him, told him he wasn't cut out for this, that he'd been an idiot to even talk to 32, let alone take that mushroom from him, let alone become his friend...

Let alone try to be a hero.

He'd have been better off just leaving 32 be in his cell.

And yet he ran. Because he wasn't a hero, not at all. He was a Royal Guard, and he wasn't about to let good ponies die.

"HEY! Are you listening to me?" Reel's voice cut through Pommel's introspection, reminding him that they were currently running to the top of the wall, towards the tower.

"Yeah! Yeah! ...no, not at all."

"Aw hell," Reel shook his head, "Pay attention, man, I said look out over the wa-DUCK!"

Pommel felt Reel dive to the ground and he quickly followed suit, feeling a whoosh of air as something careened overhead clattering onto the wall. Pommel felt the rough texture of rope fall against his back, his eyes snapped open to find a wickedly sharp grappling hook beginning to scrape towards him from the city's side of the wall. His hooves clattered against the floor, scrambling to find purchase and avoid an impalement on the hooks of the implement that dug itself into the shining fortifications of the city. Reel scrambled up, himself, making a bee line for the archway into the tower. Pommel began to follow, but turned, realization dawning on him.

"What are you doing!?" Reel shouted.

"The fight's on the other side of the guard tower, Brahmos' men are trying to flank them! They smash into the crew's side, it'll be over in seconds!" Pommel's horn lit up, he wrenched the hook away staggering with the strain, someone was climbing it. He threw it over the side and heard a scream. He allowed himself a small smile of victory...just before five more hooks just like the first shot over the side and soon latched themselves to the crenellations, making his heart sink.

"Son of a..." He cursed under his breath and made for the archway, ducking through and turning in time to see a pale white arm wrap around the top of the wall and pull a familiar and terrible face over.

"Oh. Shit," Reel said as Brahmos pitched himself over the wall, putting Pommel's thoughts mildly as he stared at the collossal minotaur...and then the minotaur stared back, and smiled.

"Reel?"

"Yeah?"

"Run."

"Already going!"

Pommel heard the retreating hoofsteps of the other unicorn as, on the wall, Brahmos smirked and drew his axes, taking a step towards Pommel. Pommel gritted his teeth, tensed his muscles and...

Blasted the archway with everything he had, causing the gold bricks to rain down and barricade the archway.

"Fucking nope!" Pommel turned tail and began scaling the stairway, ignoring the lowing of rage behind him, he had to make it to the top, there was no time to get clobbered by the gargantuan 'Pirate King'. His heart pounded in his chest as he heard a body pound against his barricade below, he knew even with his impromptu demolition there wasn't much time.

Then he stumbled up onto the top of the tower, shaking his head and nearly tripping over himself. He could feel Reel's forelegs try to hoist him up, dragging him away from the stairs.

"You okay, Pommel you-"

"FUCKING SHOOT THE THING!" Pommel blurted out, crawling forward, "Don't worry about me, signal the guys!"

"Wha-oh shit!" Reel's horn lit up at the same time as Pommel's, the two scrambling to fire off into the air, their magic going up into the sky like a demented fireworks show.

Then they looked at each other for a few moments...

"Do you...do you think it wor-?" Reel began.

'AWAKEN!'

"GAH!" Their shouts of agony came out in harmony, Reel staggered, Pommel fell, chin meeting the floor and-

------------

He had been asleep so long...too long...

The crush of water against his great back was agonizing, but...affirming. It was good to feel again. He shook himself from slumber, his long tongue darting out from its place in a forest of tentacles, many eyes regarding the expanse of blue before him, the floating splotches of darkness above.

'KILL'

Yes...yes, it all began to make sense now. Invaders. Defilers. Besmirching the glory of the city. This would not do, not at all. He had to face them, to defend his city, defend his masters...

Defend his god.

A multitude of legs, encrusted with coral and detritus, stretched from where they had stayed dormant for so many centuries, taking him up, breaking the surface. He can taste the air, he can feel the breeze, he can see the wooden ships and the tiny creatures upon them, and it is with all of these senses that he knows they are afraid.

He raised a single claw, golden, encrusted with the pure opulence of his masters' wealth, defiled with the sea life that had used it as their homes, and smashed it down upon one of the wooden ships. He could hear the screams, he relished in them. His tongue darted out, harpooning another warship and bringing it towards his hungry maw. These creatures had made the mistake of angering the guardian of the City of Gold.

He would make them see their folly.

--------

"Pommel! Wake up!" Reel's voice broke into Pommel's mind, shaking him from wherever the blast of magic had taken him, "We did it! We did...we did something...gooood? I wanna think this is good!"

Pommel staggered up, shaking his head, gazing out over the ocean to see that the edge of the city now towered over the waters below. He gaped as from below the waters rose a massive claw that held one of Brahmos' ships between its pincers, crushing it like a soda can.

He should have been terrified, but all he felt was an overpowering happiness. He laughed, and Reel laughed with him.

"YEAH! TAKE THAT BRAHMOS YOU SON OF A BITCH! HAHAHAHA!" Pommel threw back his head, taking it all in. He was dead certain this was going to end up biting him in the ass, but for now all knew was this bissful feeling of sweet sweet victory.

"Yeah, yeah!" Reel said, far less certain but only slightly less happy, "What the hell can you do now, you bastard!? We got a fucking TANK CRAB!"

"That you do, that you do," The contemplative voice behind them made Pommel's blood run cold.

"Wha-HRK!" Reel's eyes bugged out as a pale white hand wrapped itself around his neck, lifting him from the ground, his kicking form offering only token resistance.

"But tell me, what good is your crab, when your enemy is already within its defenses?" Brahmos tilted his head, honest amusement in his question.

Reel gagged, Pommel stepped forward.

"Let him go, Brahmos, he's not...AS involved in this!" Pommel's teeth clenched as he glared at the monolithic minotaur.

"Hmm...I suppose he isn't," Brahmos mused, and flicked his wrist, sending Reel flying...

Over the side of the wall.

"And now he's not involved at all. Now, coward..." Brahmos turned fully towards Pommel, drawing both of his axes.

"Let's finish what we started in Tortoiga."
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>AJ
"Dash"
~~~~

>Dash? Can ya'll explain these expenses here?

"Every single thing I put before you is necessary for the continued functioning of the Wonderbolts."

>...It say here ya' spent six hundred bits on a bottle o' good wine.

"EVERY. SINGLE. EXPENSE."

>Dash, iffin' ya' wanna get sloshed on yer' own time-

"Then I will come back to work hung over. That's right, I will go and put up with Spitfire, Fleetfoot and a healthy amount of YEAH! with a hangover."

>...

"...I'll burn it all to the ground, AJ."

>Clouds ain't flammable.

"..."

>...Aaand, approved.

"Well, would you look at that! Now you get to add ANOTHER time you saved Equestria from certain doom to the tally, good work."

>...Yer' scarin' me.

"GOOD."
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>AJ
“AJ12”
‘???’
______

“…”

>…

“…you know what, spiderling in the room, I’ll just ask-”

‘Hey! That’s me! I’m a spiderling!’

“Yes. Yes you are, Arana.”

‘Well, you called, did you need something?’

“Nope, nothing, just using you in a turn-of-phrase.”

‘Oh….’

Sigh....

“…But how’s your day going?”

‘Fantastic! I helped Apple Prime with her-’

Four. Hours. Later.

‘…zzzzng….’

“Cute little bug she is.”

>Faust alive, how the hell…? Did she really jus’ fall asleep mid-speech?

“Seems like it. She's all tuckered out, you guys must’ve had a ball at Partyland.”

>Like ya wouldn’t believe, JobJack. Seriously. Ah was there an’ even Ah’m havin’ a hard time believin' it….

“JobJack. Ha, that’s… that’s clever. But now that Ara’s asleep, like I was saying, spiderling in the room, I’ll ask. Why are your wings bent like that?”

Applejack cleared her throat, a touch of color lighting her cheeks.

>Well, if’n ya must know… Ah thought Ah’d take to the skies a bit, wit’ Dash an’ Rars, see how the weather patrol team was doin’, that sorta thing an’-

“And then things went kaplooey and the ground said hello. Right?”

>…shaddup.

“Yes, ma’am.”

>Ah’m kiddin’, JobJack. Since when did y’all ever call me that?

“Since when? Uh, I’d say ever since you started giving me chances at a job instead of outright banishing not only me but my entire hive. Yeah, I’m thinking right around there.”

>Hawh, wasn’t that big’uh deal.

Twelve only inclined his head, watching as she picked up a form he’d laid on her desk.

>But this’n here… now this is a big deal. An’ what Ah’m strugglin’ to find is the why. Ah mean, wantin’ to willingly stay there? With her? Save me the trouble of askin’.

“Princess, you’ve got to understand… that not even I know why the hell I want to continue on. Screwloose is manic, she’s downright psychotic and continually talks to herself. She even has this invisible buddy called ‘Tinsel’-”

When she flinched, he missed it.

“-and she’s always going on about how sexy her hooves are.”

>Ah. Did she show ya the trophy?

“I saw it, yes.”

>Always was proud of that thing, she was.

“And the worse part is that now I actually BELIEVE she has the sexiest hooves!”

It was rare that Applejack ever giggled, but this warranted it.

>Do y’all like her or somethin’?

“Oh hell no, she scares the love out of me to be honest. So you can see why I’m confused as to why I’m asking to keep my job there….”

>Hm. Then that might explain a few things, Ah reckon.

“Like what?”

Another note was pulled up and held next to his.

>Found this waitin’ for me when Ah got back. Apparently, Screws was plannin’ on leavin’ the ward, with or without legal consent, when we got back. Well, we’re back. An’ she’s still there.

“…You can’t possibly think I had anything to do with that.”

>Don’t really see much else that could sway ‘er, JobJack.

“I… no, no, no, look, I’m a dreaded, nightmare-inducing creature that chews up love with blood-dripping fangs. And even I wouldn’t fuck with that.”

>Right. ‘Cept y’all ain’t none’uh that. Yer’ an innocent Changelin’ tryin’ to do good and make amends.

“…y-you can tell I’m trying?”

>See it clear as day, sugar.

This wasn’t the time to cry so he forcibly quit his wibble-lipping.

“But even so… there’s nothing about me that could stop Screwloose. If she decided to stay, trust me, it wasn’t because of this bug here.”
It was if he’d never spoken.

>Why do y’all say the whole name? Jus’ call ‘er Screws.

“I would but she said she’d mutilate me if I did. I like me in one piece.”

>Do it anyway. She likes those who can show their guts.

“So the wrong phrase to use….”

>Don’t make it any less true. That’s why she don’t give me no guff. An’ while Ah’d like to just give this here form a stamp and increase yer’ days, the hospital is under Redhearts jurisdiction.

“I see….”

>Don’t gimme that look, JobJack.

“What look, princess?”

>That pitiful ‘mah life is over’ look. If ya wanna stay on with Screws then ya gotta fight fer’ it, sugar.

“…How?”

>Look, y’all done been turned away from over seventy jobs across Equestria.

“I don’t think it’s been that many-”

>Yes, seventy. Ah’ve counted, then counted again ‘cause Ah thought there was no way a soul with that much fortitude could exist. Y’all done shattered mah expectations concernin’ what Ah thought Ah knew about tenacity, JobJack. Quittin’ ain’t somethin’ yer’ capable of, Ah see that. So now Ah’m gonna tell ya what yer’ about to do next.

Getting up from her chair, Applejack crossed over to the front door and held it open, the look on her face unnaturally kind.

>Yer’ gonna walk outta this room and head down to Redheart’s office. Once y’all get there, yer’ gonna have the perfect plan on how to convince her to let y’all stay on. Permanently if’n ya feel. Because that’s yer’ talent, forgin’ on through closed doors.

“…damn it.”

He was halfway out the door when he paused with a shuddering inhale.

“C-can I ask you n-not to tell anyone that I cr-”

>Never saw a single tear, sugar. Now get goin’.

“Thanks, princess….”

When she closed the door, Applejack merely stared about her office, then at the curled up ball of legs that was Arana.

>Makes all the paperwork worth it.
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>AJ
"Pinkie"
'Dash'
~~~~~~

>So, wait, yer' still workin' at sugarcube corner?

"Sort of!"

>...

'Are you really going to question this?'

>No, no Ah' am not.

"Good, it's probably not really going to come up anyway. And hey, you guys get my employee discount!"

'There is a reason for everything.'

>...

'...They come with free chineighs fortune cookies now. What's yours say?'

>..."Strange changes will be happenin' in yer' life soon."

"..."

'...'

>...Nooooooo....
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>Dash
"Twilight"
'AJ'
~~~~

>....Huh.

"Am I smart, or am I BRILLIANT!?"

>Uh, neither.

"...Huh?"

>I was thinking, like, certifiable.

"Okay, the fact you think this is a bad idea is worrying me."

>As it should.

"But what's wrong with it, really? I thought it was pretty smart."

>Yeah, on paper, a magical zero gravity room would be good, yeah? She could learn a lot about forward momentum with this.

"See?"

>There's just one thing you didn't think of.

"I highly doubt you thought of something I didn't."

>Oh yeah? HEY! AJ!

'Yeah?'

>You doing good hovering there?

'Yeah, I think I'm finally used to it!'

>All braced up?

'Ah' am!'

>...And flick.

"DASH DON'T TOUCH THAT-"

*WOOOooooo...*

'ACK!'

*CRASH!*

>...

"...Oh! I see! She got too used to lack of external influence pulling her down, so when she got back to normal gravity she was unprepared. I see the flaw in this now, yeah."

>...

"...Shut up, it was a good idea."

>You okay, Applejack?

'AH' LIKE PEARS!'

>Concussion it is.
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

NC
>Applejack
"Celestia"
'??'
~~~

>Hey, Celestia? Got a-

"I have a massive, massive headache right now Applejack, can it wait?"

>Yer' fault for gettin' yerself tanked. Now, about Everfree-

"Really, Applejack, I just need an hour or so."

>Well, ya' ain't gettin' it!

"Please don't yell."

>It's yer' own fault and Ah' ain't givin' ya' a lick of sympathy!

"Applejack, I'm warning you."

>Well, Ah'm gonna get louder, just cause ya' said that!

"Really, Applejack, this is your last chance."

>The problem at the border is-

"THAT'S IT!"

She stamped her hoof, and a strange symbol appeared on the floor.

"FORBIDDEN SUMMONING, BUBBLEHORSE!"

With an explosion of dark magic, the chanting of demons and the laughter of the forgotten, the room became enveloped in blackness.

When it went away, it left only Shining Armor.

Wearing a shower cap and holding a loofa, in addition to being dripping wet.

>...
'...'
"...Make her go awwwaaaayyyyy!"

The pathetic, almost child like way she asked as she grabbed hold of him in a tight hug was enough to make even Applejack do a double take.

'...Hey, AJ? Just send... whatever my way, I'll look over it for her. She sounds like she needs a break.'

In response, she just gave a sad little whimper, and rubbed against his cheek.

>...Eeeeyup.

That was all she said before she turned on her heels, idly chucking the paper back and trotting off.

'Thanks!... You can let go of me now.'

"Nuh uh..."

'You're going to get all wet.'

"Mngh..."

'....Sigh...'
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>Blueblood
"Rekulk"
'Vekir'
-Grehm-

>Okay, she's not in her office so that must mean she's...

"'AHA!'"

>...hello.

"We have searched both the high and low-"

'-and the near and the far for you!'

>Uh...huh?

"You are hard to find!"

'It is to be expected! He is white, the city is white! He blends in!'

-Like a burrow leech.-

'Exactly!'

>...do I know you?

"...whoops, apologies! You have not seen us with the armor off! Armor off!"

'-Armor off!-'

>Oh! It's you, Rekulk and...more of you.

"Blood of Blue, this is my sister Vekir, and my brother-by-mate Grehm."

'It is much of a pleasance to meet you, Blood of Blue!'

-You are to be revered.-

>I...what?

"Yes! We are back on the track! We have come to give you a gift of apology!"

'Yes muchly!'

"I behaved shamefully to you, Blood of Blue, and for that I am sorry! To show this sorriness, we have retrieved for you a token of appreciation!"

Before Bluelood can respond, the slightly damaged book from Partyland is shoved into his chest, he levitates it.

>Seven Habits of Highly Successful Ponies?

-A tome of knowledge.-

'For the improvement of the self!'

"May it help you as you have helped us, Blood of Blue, farewell! Armor on!"

'-Armor on!-'

The trio of Morlocks run away, their armor clanking as they do.

>...uh...what did I DO?
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________