sofiasari

a bad mom2

Nov 24th, 2018
331
Never
Not a member of Pastebin yet? Sign Up, it unlocks many cool features!
  1. 0
  2. 00:00:05,000 --> 00:00:15,000
  3. INDOXXI
  4. Support dengan like & share :)
  5.  
  6. 1
  7. 00:00:30,960 --> 00:00:32,960
  8. (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
  9.  
  10. 2
  11. 00:00:34,970 --> 00:00:42,970
  12. Subtitle By: explosiveskull & Re-Sync By: bozxphd
  13. & Improved By: Fidel33
  14. Sub Upload Date: July 16, 2018
  15.  
  16. 3
  17. 00:00:43,270 --> 00:00:46,200
  18. (THE LUMINEERS SINGING
  19. "BLUE CHRISTMAS")
  20.  
  21. 4
  22. 00:00:46,200 --> 00:00:51,640
  23. ♪ I'll have a blue Christmas ♪
  24.  
  25. 5
  26. 00:00:51,640 --> 00:00:53,380
  27. ♪ Without you ♪
  28.  
  29. 6
  30. 00:00:55,180 --> 00:00:59,180
  31. ♪ I'll be so blue ♪
  32.  
  33. 7
  34. 00:00:59,180 --> 00:01:02,990
  35. ♪ Thinkin' about you ♪
  36.  
  37. 8
  38. 00:01:05,360 --> 00:01:10,530
  39. ♪ You'll be doin' alright ♪
  40.  
  41. 9
  42. 00:01:10,530 --> 00:01:14,530
  43. ♪ With your Christmas
  44. of white ♪
  45.  
  46. 10
  47. 00:01:15,830 --> 00:01:19,200
  48. ♪ But I'll have a blue ♪
  49.  
  50. 11
  51. 00:01:19,200 --> 00:01:22,010
  52. ♪ Blue Christmas ♪
  53.  
  54. 12
  55. 00:01:25,210 --> 00:01:27,140
  56. AMY:
  57. I'm Amy Mitchell.
  58.  
  59. 13
  60. 00:01:27,150 --> 00:01:28,510
  61. And this year
  62.  
  63. 14
  64. 00:01:28,510 --> 00:01:30,420
  65. I ruined Christmas.
  66.  
  67. 15
  68. 00:01:31,520 --> 00:01:33,250
  69. Christmas is by far
  70.  
  71. 16
  72. 00:01:33,250 --> 00:01:35,990
  73. the most stressful
  74. time of the year for moms.
  75.  
  76. 17
  77. 00:01:35,990 --> 00:01:38,190
  78. There are a million
  79. things to do.
  80.  
  81. 18
  82. 00:01:38,190 --> 00:01:40,260
  83. And you have to do them
  84. all perfectly
  85.  
  86. 19
  87. 00:01:40,260 --> 00:01:42,490
  88. or else you will
  89. never forgive yourself.
  90.  
  91. 20
  92. 00:01:42,490 --> 00:01:45,690
  93. And more importantly,
  94. neither will your kids.
  95.  
  96. 21
  97. 00:01:45,700 --> 00:01:47,060
  98. I literally feel like
  99.  
  100. 22
  101. 00:01:47,070 --> 00:01:49,770
  102. the worst mom
  103. in the world right now.
  104.  
  105. 23
  106. 00:01:49,770 --> 00:01:51,270
  107. (CAMEL GRUNTS)
  108.  
  109. 24
  110. 00:01:55,770 --> 00:01:58,210
  111. Maybe I should start
  112. at the beginning.
  113.  
  114. 25
  115. 00:01:58,210 --> 00:02:01,110
  116. (FESTIVE MUSIC)
  117.  
  118. 26
  119. 00:02:04,080 --> 00:02:06,250
  120. I've always loved Christmas.
  121.  
  122. 27
  123. 00:02:06,250 --> 00:02:09,190
  124. It's my favorite
  125. time of the year.
  126.  
  127. 28
  128. 00:02:09,190 --> 00:02:12,390
  129. Most of all, I love
  130. the time with my family.
  131.  
  132. 29
  133. 00:02:15,930 --> 00:02:17,590
  134. Because all I want
  135.  
  136. 30
  137. 00:02:17,600 --> 00:02:19,700
  138. all any mom wants
  139.  
  140. 31
  141. 00:02:19,700 --> 00:02:22,130
  142. is for their kids to have
  143. an amazing Christmas.
  144.  
  145. 32
  146. 00:02:22,130 --> 00:02:23,700
  147. ♪ Can't love me like you ♪
  148.  
  149. 33
  150. 00:02:23,700 --> 00:02:26,740
  151. ♪ L-O-V-E ♪
  152.  
  153. 34
  154. 00:02:26,740 --> 00:02:30,570
  155. That said, Christmas is
  156. an insane amount of work.
  157.  
  158. 35
  159. 00:02:30,580 --> 00:02:32,440
  160. First, you have to buy gifts
  161.  
  162. 36
  163. 00:02:32,440 --> 00:02:34,640
  164. for every human being
  165. you've ever met.
  166.  
  167. 37
  168. 00:02:34,650 --> 00:02:38,380
  169. I gave my coffee guy
  170. a scented candle this year.
  171.  
  172. 38
  173. 00:02:38,380 --> 00:02:40,480
  174. Why did I do that?
  175.  
  176. 39
  177. 00:02:40,490 --> 00:02:42,620
  178. Then, you have to decorate
  179. your house
  180.  
  181. 40
  182. 00:02:42,620 --> 00:02:44,820
  183. which, clearly, I suck at.
  184.  
  185. 41
  186. 00:02:44,820 --> 00:02:48,290
  187. I'm doing the best I can,
  188. Charmaine!
  189.  
  190. 42
  191. 00:02:48,290 --> 00:02:51,390
  192. Then, you have to go to
  193. all your kids' Christmas shows
  194.  
  195. 43
  196. 00:02:51,400 --> 00:02:52,660
  197. which are...
  198.  
  199. 44
  200. 00:02:52,660 --> 00:02:54,730
  201. (DISCORDANT CELLO MUSIC)
  202.  
  203. 45
  204. 00:02:54,730 --> 00:02:56,500
  205. Yeah.
  206.  
  207. 46
  208. 00:02:56,500 --> 00:02:59,570
  209. Then, there's all the
  210. over-the-top Christmas parties.
  211.  
  212. 47
  213. 00:02:59,570 --> 00:03:00,840
  214. Oh, my God.
  215.  
  216. 48
  217. 00:03:00,840 --> 00:03:02,740
  218. Are these lobster Santa hats?
  219.  
  220. 49
  221. 00:03:02,740 --> 00:03:04,340
  222. Are these a thing now?
  223.  
  224. 50
  225. 00:03:04,340 --> 00:03:06,440
  226. What the fuck?
  227.  
  228. 51
  229. 00:03:06,440 --> 00:03:08,410
  230. Then, there's all the cooking
  231.  
  232. 52
  233. 00:03:08,410 --> 00:03:10,350
  234. all the cleaning
  235.  
  236. 53
  237. 00:03:10,350 --> 00:03:11,910
  238. all the wrapping.
  239.  
  240. 54
  241. 00:03:11,920 --> 00:03:14,120
  242. It's insane!
  243.  
  244. 55
  245. 00:03:14,120 --> 00:03:16,490
  246. There's just never enough time.
  247.  
  248. 56
  249. 00:03:16,490 --> 00:03:17,850
  250. Argh!
  251.  
  252. 57
  253. 00:03:17,860 --> 00:03:20,090
  254. (FESTIVE MUSIC)
  255.  
  256. 58
  257. 00:03:26,270 --> 00:03:27,700
  258. - Hi, mom.
  259. - Hey.
  260.  
  261. 59
  262. 00:03:27,700 --> 00:03:28,970
  263. - Hey!
  264. - How was the game?
  265.  
  266. 60
  267. 00:03:28,970 --> 00:03:30,430
  268. It was great! The Bulls won.
  269.  
  270. 61
  271. 00:03:30,430 --> 00:03:33,100
  272. - Yes! Congratulations.
  273. - Yes!
  274.  
  275. 62
  276. 00:03:33,110 --> 00:03:34,440
  277. - Hi, honey.
  278. - I love you, baby.
  279.  
  280. 63
  281. 00:03:34,440 --> 00:03:36,870
  282. Wow. Your house
  283. looks really great.
  284.  
  285. 64
  286. 00:03:36,870 --> 00:03:38,210
  287. Oh, thank you.
  288.  
  289. 65
  290. 00:03:38,210 --> 00:03:40,340
  291. I still-I still got
  292. lots left to do, but...
  293.  
  294. 66
  295. 00:03:40,340 --> 00:03:41,680
  296. Can I do anything to help?
  297.  
  298. 67
  299. 00:03:41,680 --> 00:03:43,050
  300. No, no, not unless
  301. you know how
  302.  
  303. 68
  304. 00:03:43,050 --> 00:03:44,810
  305. to magically fix
  306. Christmas lights.
  307.  
  308. 69
  309. 00:03:44,820 --> 00:03:46,280
  310. Yeah. Yeah, I can do that.
  311.  
  312. 70
  313. 00:03:46,280 --> 00:03:47,850
  314. Yeah, you just
  315. swap out the fuse.
  316.  
  317. 71
  318. 00:03:47,850 --> 00:03:49,650
  319. It's pretty easy.
  320.  
  321. 72
  322. 00:03:49,650 --> 00:03:52,520
  323. That's pretty hot. I won't lie.
  324.  
  325. 73
  326. 00:03:52,520 --> 00:03:54,960
  327. Oh, you're definitely getting
  328. the gold-star treatment tonight.
  329.  
  330. 74
  331. 00:03:54,960 --> 00:03:56,530
  332. I like that,
  333. but hold that thought.
  334.  
  335. 75
  336. 00:03:56,530 --> 00:03:57,700
  337. Okay.
  338.  
  339. 76
  340. 00:03:59,160 --> 00:04:02,970
  341. Oh. Your dad is awesome.
  342.  
  343. 77
  344. 00:04:02,970 --> 00:04:04,730
  345. I thought you hated him.
  346.  
  347. 78
  348. 00:04:04,740 --> 00:04:08,240
  349. What? No, honey, what?
  350. Why would you say that?
  351.  
  352. 79
  353. 00:04:08,240 --> 00:04:10,740
  354. When you came over
  355. to the house last week
  356.  
  357. 80
  358. 00:04:10,740 --> 00:04:12,310
  359. I heard you and daddy
  360. in the bedroom
  361.  
  362. 81
  363. 00:04:12,310 --> 00:04:14,680
  364. and you kept
  365. screaming at him.
  366.  
  367. 82
  368. 00:04:15,680 --> 00:04:17,850
  369. Oh, yeah.
  370.  
  371. 83
  372. 00:04:17,850 --> 00:04:19,520
  373. No, honey, those were...
  374.  
  375. 84
  376. 00:04:19,520 --> 00:04:21,020
  377. Those were happy screams.
  378.  
  379. 85
  380. 00:04:21,020 --> 00:04:23,020
  381. They didn't sound happy.
  382.  
  383. 86
  384. 00:04:23,020 --> 00:04:24,550
  385. And then you punched the wall
  386.  
  387. 87
  388. 00:04:24,560 --> 00:04:26,890
  389. and yelled the F-word.
  390.  
  391. 88
  392. 00:04:26,890 --> 00:04:29,230
  393. Okay, I-I, um...
  394.  
  395. 89
  396. 00:04:29,230 --> 00:04:30,760
  397. Yeah, I don't,
  398. I don't really recall
  399.  
  400. 90
  401. 00:04:30,760 --> 00:04:32,260
  402. doing that, so, yeah.
  403.  
  404. 91
  405. 00:04:32,260 --> 00:04:33,600
  406. - I don't know if that happened.
  407. - You did.
  408.  
  409. 92
  410. 00:04:33,600 --> 00:04:36,430
  411. You were like,
  412. "Oh, my fucking God!"
  413.  
  414. 93
  415. 00:04:36,430 --> 00:04:37,930
  416. Just like that.
  417.  
  418. 94
  419. 00:04:37,940 --> 00:04:39,400
  420. "Oh, my fucking God!"
  421.  
  422. 95
  423. 00:04:39,400 --> 00:04:41,500
  424. Okay, alright. Shh! Shh!
  425.  
  426. 96
  427. 00:04:41,510 --> 00:04:43,770
  428. Um, here's the thing.
  429.  
  430. 97
  431. 00:04:43,780 --> 00:04:45,540
  432. Your dad and I
  433. were just playing a fun
  434.  
  435. 98
  436. 00:04:45,540 --> 00:04:46,780
  437. little grown-up game.
  438.  
  439. 99
  440. 00:04:46,780 --> 00:04:49,450
  441. You played the game seven times.
  442.  
  443. 100
  444. 00:04:49,450 --> 00:04:50,750
  445. Six and a half.
  446. But who's counting?
  447.  
  448. 101
  449. 00:04:50,750 --> 00:04:52,720
  450. Here's the thing,
  451. let's just not...
  452.  
  453. 102
  454. 00:04:52,720 --> 00:04:53,950
  455. Let's just not talk about this.
  456.  
  457. 103
  458. 00:04:53,950 --> 00:04:55,220
  459. - Cool?
  460. - Cool.
  461.  
  462. 104
  463. 00:04:55,220 --> 00:04:57,060
  464. - High-five. Awesome.
  465. - Got it.
  466.  
  467. 105
  468. 00:04:59,930 --> 00:05:01,860
  469. (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
  470.  
  471. 106
  472. 00:05:01,860 --> 00:05:03,560
  473. (INHALES)
  474. Oh, no.
  475.  
  476. 107
  477. 00:05:04,530 --> 00:05:05,900
  478. What is it?
  479.  
  480. 108
  481. 00:05:07,370 --> 00:05:09,430
  482. My mother's
  483. coming for Christmas.
  484.  
  485. 109
  486. 00:05:10,400 --> 00:05:12,900
  487. Oh, my fucking God!
  488.  
  489. 110
  490. 00:05:12,900 --> 00:05:14,440
  491. (FESTIVE MUSIC)
  492.  
  493. 111
  494. 00:05:16,040 --> 00:05:18,780
  495. Thanks for helping me decorate
  496. the tree, guys.
  497.  
  498. 112
  499. 00:05:21,050 --> 00:05:24,110
  500. Bernard, let's hang 'em
  501. on the tree. Okay, buddy?
  502.  
  503. 113
  504. 00:05:24,120 --> 00:05:25,920
  505. Oh, who put the big
  506. brown ornament
  507.  
  508. 114
  509. 00:05:25,920 --> 00:05:27,420
  510. right on the front
  511. of the tree?
  512.  
  513. 115
  514. 00:05:27,420 --> 00:05:29,550
  515. - It looks like doodie.
  516. - Yes, it does, baby.
  517.  
  518. 116
  519. 00:05:29,550 --> 00:05:31,420
  520. And that's why mommy's
  521. gonna move it around back.
  522.  
  523. 117
  524. 00:05:31,420 --> 00:05:32,820
  525. Oh, no, sweetie
  526.  
  527. 118
  528. 00:05:32,820 --> 00:05:34,490
  529. we don't drink
  530. the tree water.
  531.  
  532. 119
  533. 00:05:34,490 --> 00:05:35,730
  534. We don't drink the tree water
  535.  
  536. 120
  537. 00:05:35,730 --> 00:05:37,060
  538. 'cause we're people, right?
  539.  
  540. 121
  541. 00:05:37,060 --> 00:05:39,160
  542. Mommy, is there a Santa Claus?
  543.  
  544. 122
  545. 00:05:39,160 --> 00:05:40,630
  546. You bet there is, buddy.
  547.  
  548. 123
  549. 00:05:40,630 --> 00:05:43,500
  550. - I know.
  551. - Are you lying to me, mommy?
  552.  
  553. 124
  554. 00:05:43,500 --> 00:05:45,330
  555. Oh, God, make it stop.
  556.  
  557. 125
  558. 00:05:45,340 --> 00:05:47,970
  559. What else have you lied about?
  560.  
  561. 126
  562. 00:05:47,970 --> 00:05:49,840
  563. - Hey, babe.
  564. - Hey, dad.
  565.  
  566. 127
  567. 00:05:49,840 --> 00:05:51,570
  568. - Hi, guys.
  569. - Hi.
  570.  
  571. 128
  572. 00:05:51,580 --> 00:05:52,950
  573. - You alright?
  574. - Yeah.
  575.  
  576. 129
  577. 00:05:54,280 --> 00:05:55,750
  578. - Tree looks great.
  579. - Thank you.
  580.  
  581. 130
  582. 00:05:55,750 --> 00:05:57,350
  583. - Want me to feed the twins?
  584. - Yes, please.
  585.  
  586. 131
  587. 00:05:57,350 --> 00:05:59,420
  588. - Hey, buddy. Good to see you.
  589. - Thank you.
  590.  
  591. 132
  592. 00:05:59,420 --> 00:06:00,450
  593. - Let's get some food.
  594. - It's okay, buddy.
  595.  
  596. 133
  597. 00:06:00,450 --> 00:06:01,480
  598. Aw, it's alright.
  599.  
  600. 134
  601. 00:06:01,490 --> 00:06:02,690
  602. (DOOR BELL DINGS)
  603.  
  604. 135
  605. 00:06:02,690 --> 00:06:04,820
  606. (BABY CRYING)
  607.  
  608. 136
  609. 00:06:08,660 --> 00:06:11,090
  610. Hah! Merry Christmas, Kiki!
  611.  
  612. 137
  613. 00:06:11,100 --> 00:06:15,330
  614. - Mom? Hi!
  615. - Oh... my... gosh!
  616.  
  617. 138
  618. 00:06:15,330 --> 00:06:17,300
  619. I thought you weren't
  620. coming until Friday.
  621.  
  622. 139
  623. 00:06:17,300 --> 00:06:19,670
  624. Well, I just hopped
  625. on an earlier flight.
  626.  
  627. 140
  628. 00:06:19,670 --> 00:06:23,110
  629. - Three days earlier?
  630. - Oh.
  631.  
  632. 141
  633. 00:06:23,110 --> 00:06:25,310
  634. I-I haven't made up
  635. the guest bedroom or anything.
  636.  
  637. 142
  638. 00:06:25,310 --> 00:06:27,640
  639. That's okay.
  640. I'll just sleep with you.
  641.  
  642. 143
  643. 00:06:27,650 --> 00:06:29,450
  644. Big spoon, little spoon.
  645.  
  646. 144
  647. 00:06:29,450 --> 00:06:31,350
  648. I usually sleep
  649. with my husband now.
  650.  
  651. 145
  652. 00:06:31,350 --> 00:06:33,390
  653. Hey, you wanna see
  654. the sweatshirt I made?
  655.  
  656. 146
  657. 00:06:34,820 --> 00:06:37,690
  658. (EXHALES)
  659. I love this picture.
  660.  
  661. 147
  662. 00:06:37,690 --> 00:06:40,520
  663. And look, you were just getting
  664. your little tiny breasts.
  665.  
  666. 148
  667. 00:06:40,530 --> 00:06:42,390
  668. - Well, one of 'em, anyway.
  669. - You just got here.
  670.  
  671. 149
  672. 00:06:42,390 --> 00:06:43,730
  673. Let's not talk about my breasts.
  674.  
  675. 150
  676. 00:06:43,730 --> 00:06:45,330
  677. - Then the other one popped out.
  678. - Yeah.
  679.  
  680. 151
  681. 00:06:45,330 --> 00:06:47,360
  682. (CHUCKLES)
  683. Thank goodness!
  684.  
  685. 152
  686. 00:06:47,370 --> 00:06:49,530
  687. Oh, Keeks!
  688.  
  689. 153
  690. 00:06:49,530 --> 00:06:51,670
  691. If you play your cards right,
  692. you could get
  693.  
  694. 154
  695. 00:06:51,670 --> 00:06:53,340
  696. a sweatshirt just like this
  697. for Christmas.
  698.  
  699. 155
  700. 00:06:53,340 --> 00:06:55,310
  701. Oh, no.
  702.  
  703. 156
  704. 00:06:55,310 --> 00:06:59,010
  705. Oh, Kiki Dee,
  706. I cannot wait
  707.  
  708. 157
  709. 00:06:59,010 --> 00:07:02,140
  710. to spend every waking minute
  711.  
  712. 158
  713. 00:07:02,150 --> 00:07:04,010
  714. of the next three weeks
  715. with you.
  716.  
  717. 159
  718. 00:07:04,010 --> 00:07:05,320
  719. (NERVOUSLY)
  720. Hmm...
  721.  
  722. 160
  723. 00:07:05,320 --> 00:07:07,080
  724. Oh!
  725.  
  726. 161
  727. 00:07:07,080 --> 00:07:10,220
  728. (INHALES DEEPLY)
  729. Hmm...
  730.  
  731. 162
  732. 00:07:10,220 --> 00:07:11,350
  733. Are you smelling my hair?
  734.  
  735. 163
  736. 00:07:11,360 --> 00:07:12,990
  737. Yes.
  738.  
  739. 164
  740. 00:07:12,990 --> 00:07:15,890
  741. (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
  742.  
  743. 165
  744. 00:07:20,870 --> 00:07:22,600
  745. Oh, my God.
  746.  
  747. 166
  748. 00:07:22,600 --> 00:07:24,430
  749. If I have to wax
  750. one more pussy today
  751.  
  752. 167
  753. 00:07:24,440 --> 00:07:26,170
  754. I'm gonna black out.
  755.  
  756. 168
  757. 00:07:26,170 --> 00:07:27,940
  758. Since when did
  759. every woman in America
  760.  
  761. 169
  762. 00:07:27,940 --> 00:07:31,570
  763. need a completely hairless
  764. vagina on Christmas?
  765.  
  766. 170
  767. 00:07:31,580 --> 00:07:33,580
  768. (MUMBLES)
  769.  
  770. 171
  771. 00:07:33,580 --> 00:07:35,510
  772. Anyone else here for a wax?
  773.  
  774. 172
  775. 00:07:37,120 --> 00:07:41,020
  776. Oh, my God,
  777. that's like 50 more vaginas.
  778.  
  779. 173
  780. 00:07:41,020 --> 00:07:42,420
  781. Okay, who's next?
  782.  
  783. 174
  784. 00:07:44,120 --> 00:07:46,360
  785. Oh, no, not you, sasquatch.
  786.  
  787. 175
  788. 00:07:46,360 --> 00:07:48,690
  789. I can't handle you right now.
  790.  
  791. 176
  792. 00:07:48,690 --> 00:07:50,600
  793. CARLA:
  794. Hmm, let's see.
  795.  
  796. 177
  797. 00:07:52,030 --> 00:07:55,400
  798. Oh. You. Betty White.
  799.  
  800. 178
  801. 00:07:56,570 --> 00:07:58,630
  802. I'm intrigued.
  803.  
  804. 179
  805. 00:07:58,640 --> 00:07:59,810
  806. Come with me.
  807.  
  808. 180
  809. 00:08:10,480 --> 00:08:12,320
  810. (TRAILER HONKING)
  811.  
  812. 181
  813. 00:08:13,880 --> 00:08:17,150
  814. Hey, what's up, lady?
  815.  
  816. 182
  817. 00:08:17,160 --> 00:08:18,790
  818. - Mom?
  819. - Ha-ha!
  820.  
  821. 183
  822. 00:08:18,790 --> 00:08:20,920
  823. Wait, what the actual fuck?
  824.  
  825. 184
  826. 00:08:20,930 --> 00:08:23,060
  827. (LAUGHS)
  828.  
  829. 185
  830. 00:08:23,060 --> 00:08:24,830
  831. Oh, my God!
  832.  
  833. 186
  834. 00:08:24,830 --> 00:08:28,500
  835. Ah! My God! My God!
  836.  
  837. 187
  838. 00:08:28,500 --> 00:08:29,900
  839. Oh, my God!
  840.  
  841. 188
  842. 00:08:29,900 --> 00:08:31,230
  843. (CACKLES)
  844.  
  845. 189
  846. 00:08:31,240 --> 00:08:32,470
  847. Wait, I... Well,
  848. you didn't tell me
  849.  
  850. 190
  851. 00:08:32,470 --> 00:08:34,240
  852. you were coming for Christmas.
  853.  
  854. 191
  855. 00:08:34,240 --> 00:08:36,240
  856. It's Christmas?
  857.  
  858. 192
  859. 00:08:36,240 --> 00:08:37,910
  860. Uh, yeah.
  861. Isn't that why you're here?
  862.  
  863. 193
  864. 00:08:37,910 --> 00:08:39,780
  865. Totally! Totally why I'm here.
  866.  
  867. 194
  868. 00:08:39,780 --> 00:08:42,250
  869. Merry Christmas, lady.
  870. Merry Christmas.
  871.  
  872. 195
  873. 00:08:42,250 --> 00:08:44,280
  874. Jesus, look at you!
  875.  
  876. 196
  877. 00:08:44,280 --> 00:08:45,820
  878. You bitch,
  879. you don't age at all.
  880.  
  881. 197
  882. 00:08:45,820 --> 00:08:47,250
  883. Look how fucking hot you look!
  884.  
  885. 198
  886. 00:08:47,250 --> 00:08:48,650
  887. Look at those boobs.
  888.  
  889. 199
  890. 00:08:48,650 --> 00:08:51,420
  891. Oh, thanks. You're lookin'
  892. a little bit older.
  893.  
  894. 200
  895. 00:08:51,420 --> 00:08:53,360
  896. But good, you look good.
  897.  
  898. 201
  899. 00:08:53,360 --> 00:08:55,090
  900. What's it been,
  901. like three years?
  902.  
  903. 202
  904. 00:08:55,090 --> 00:08:56,490
  905. Three?
  906.  
  907. 203
  908. 00:08:56,490 --> 00:08:58,160
  909. Whoa, really?
  910.  
  911. 204
  912. 00:08:58,160 --> 00:08:59,430
  913. Oh, gosh. I don't know, babe.
  914.  
  915. 205
  916. 00:08:59,430 --> 00:09:00,760
  917. I don't really know
  918. what year it is.
  919.  
  920. 206
  921. 00:09:00,760 --> 00:09:02,800
  922. (LAUGHS)
  923.  
  924. 207
  925. 00:09:02,800 --> 00:09:04,670
  926. Why are you wearing
  927. black pajamas?
  928.  
  929. 208
  930. 00:09:04,670 --> 00:09:08,000
  931. Oh, uh... No, yeah, I, uh...
  932.  
  933. 209
  934. 00:09:08,010 --> 00:09:10,010
  935. I work at a spa.
  936.  
  937. 210
  938. 00:09:10,010 --> 00:09:12,180
  939. You have a fucking job?
  940.  
  941. 211
  942. 00:09:12,180 --> 00:09:13,780
  943. Yeah. Yeah.
  944.  
  945. 212
  946. 00:09:15,610 --> 00:09:17,550
  947. I'm tryin' to be more
  948. responsible and shit.
  949.  
  950. 213
  951. 00:09:17,550 --> 00:09:21,550
  952. Oh, you always were so weird.
  953.  
  954. 214
  955. 00:09:24,560 --> 00:09:25,790
  956. So why are you really here, mom?
  957.  
  958. 215
  959. 00:09:25,790 --> 00:09:27,790
  960. What do you mean?
  961.  
  962. 216
  963. 00:09:27,790 --> 00:09:30,330
  964. Well, you only come
  965. when you need money.
  966.  
  967. 217
  968. 00:09:30,330 --> 00:09:32,190
  969. Uh, oh... No, no, no.
  970.  
  971. 218
  972. 00:09:32,200 --> 00:09:34,060
  973. I don't gamble anymore.
  974.  
  975. 219
  976. 00:09:34,070 --> 00:09:35,500
  977. No, I'm just here to see
  978.  
  979. 220
  980. 00:09:35,500 --> 00:09:37,000
  981. my daughter on Easter.
  982.  
  983. 221
  984. 00:09:37,000 --> 00:09:38,640
  985. - Christmas.
  986. - Christmas.
  987.  
  988. 222
  989. 00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:41,470
  990. So I think we should celebrate.
  991.  
  992. 223
  993. 00:09:41,470 --> 00:09:44,140
  994. I know, Thunder Down Under
  995.  
  996. 224
  997. 00:09:44,140 --> 00:09:46,180
  998. is playing by the airport.
  999.  
  1000. 225
  1001. 00:09:46,180 --> 00:09:48,150
  1002. I think we should hit that hard.
  1003.  
  1004. 226
  1005. 00:09:49,480 --> 00:09:51,650
  1006. - Male strippers?
  1007. - Yeah.
  1008.  
  1009. 227
  1010. 00:09:51,650 --> 00:09:53,650
  1011. - With my mother?
  1012. - Mm-hm-hm.
  1013.  
  1014. 228
  1015. 00:09:53,650 --> 00:09:55,080
  1016. (INHALES SHARPLY)
  1017. On Christmas?
  1018.  
  1019. 229
  1020. 00:09:55,090 --> 00:09:56,220
  1021. Yeah.
  1022.  
  1023. 230
  1024. 00:09:57,190 --> 00:09:59,190
  1025. How could I say no?
  1026.  
  1027. 231
  1028. 00:09:59,190 --> 00:10:01,360
  1029. Let's go slap
  1030. some wieners, bitch!
  1031.  
  1032. 232
  1033. 00:10:01,360 --> 00:10:03,660
  1034. - Alright! That's my girl.
  1035. - Whoo!
  1036.  
  1037. 233
  1038. 00:10:03,660 --> 00:10:05,230
  1039. Oh, my God, Jaxon is gonna
  1040.  
  1041. 234
  1042. 00:10:05,230 --> 00:10:07,160
  1043. shit himself when he sees you.
  1044.  
  1045. 235
  1046. 00:10:07,160 --> 00:10:08,670
  1047. Still got that kid, huh?
  1048.  
  1049. 236
  1050. 00:10:08,670 --> 00:10:09,870
  1051. Yup, yup.
  1052.  
  1053. 237
  1054. 00:10:09,870 --> 00:10:11,500
  1055. How old is he now?
  1056.  
  1057. 238
  1058. 00:10:11,500 --> 00:10:13,500
  1059. Oh, 15 or 17.
  1060.  
  1061. 239
  1062. 00:10:13,500 --> 00:10:15,710
  1063. - Oh, cute, cute.
  1064. - Yeah.
  1065.  
  1066. 240
  1067. 00:10:20,280 --> 00:10:21,610
  1068. So your mom and dad have never
  1069.  
  1070. 241
  1071. 00:10:21,610 --> 00:10:22,710
  1072. been here
  1073. on Christmas before?
  1074.  
  1075. 242
  1076. 00:10:22,710 --> 00:10:24,850
  1077. Um, no, no.
  1078.  
  1079. 243
  1080. 00:10:24,850 --> 00:10:26,750
  1081. AMY: Okay, wait, do you, do you
  1082. think that I made enough food?
  1083.  
  1084. 244
  1085. 00:10:26,750 --> 00:10:28,250
  1086. Uh, seriously?
  1087.  
  1088. 245
  1089. 00:10:28,250 --> 00:10:29,620
  1090. I can make quiche.
  1091. I'm gonna go make quiche.
  1092.  
  1093. 246
  1094. 00:10:29,620 --> 00:10:31,590
  1095. Babe, everything's
  1096. gonna be fine.
  1097.  
  1098. 247
  1099. 00:10:31,590 --> 00:10:33,890
  1100. No, honey,
  1101. it's not gonna be fine.
  1102.  
  1103. 248
  1104. 00:10:33,890 --> 00:10:37,890
  1105. My mom is the most critical
  1106. human being on the planet.
  1107.  
  1108. 249
  1109. 00:10:37,900 --> 00:10:39,230
  1110. When I was six years old
  1111.  
  1112. 250
  1113. 00:10:39,230 --> 00:10:41,030
  1114. I made her a birthday card.
  1115.  
  1116. 251
  1117. 00:10:41,030 --> 00:10:42,600
  1118. And she returned it with notes.
  1119.  
  1120. 252
  1121. 00:10:42,600 --> 00:10:43,800
  1122. Okay, that's fucked up.
  1123.  
  1124. 253
  1125. 00:10:43,800 --> 00:10:45,470
  1126. The point is she's perfect
  1127.  
  1128. 254
  1129. 00:10:45,470 --> 00:10:48,140
  1130. at everything and she is
  1131. impossible to please.
  1132.  
  1133. 255
  1134. 00:10:48,140 --> 00:10:49,570
  1135. But if she's
  1136. impossible to please
  1137.  
  1138. 256
  1139. 00:10:49,570 --> 00:10:50,640
  1140. why're you tryin' so hard
  1141. to please her?
  1142.  
  1143. 257
  1144. 00:10:50,640 --> 00:10:52,070
  1145. Listen, I'll tell you the truth.
  1146.  
  1147. 258
  1148. 00:10:52,080 --> 00:10:53,240
  1149. Daughters spend
  1150. their whole lives trying
  1151.  
  1152. 259
  1153. 00:10:53,240 --> 00:10:54,580
  1154. to please their mothers,
  1155. and mothers
  1156.  
  1157. 260
  1158. 00:10:54,580 --> 00:10:55,710
  1159. spend their whole lives
  1160.  
  1161. 261
  1162. 00:10:55,710 --> 00:10:57,250
  1163. shitting all over
  1164. their daughters.
  1165.  
  1166. 262
  1167. 00:10:57,250 --> 00:10:59,380
  1168. It's just how the world works.
  1169. Okay? I can't fix that.
  1170.  
  1171. 263
  1172. 00:10:59,380 --> 00:11:01,650
  1173. I'm not,
  1174. I'm not fucking Beyoncé.
  1175.  
  1176. 264
  1177. 00:11:01,650 --> 00:11:03,890
  1178. (CHUCKLES)
  1179. Well, y-y-you are to me.
  1180.  
  1181. 265
  1182. 00:11:03,890 --> 00:11:05,050
  1183. - Ugh.
  1184. - I love you.
  1185.  
  1186. 266
  1187. 00:11:05,060 --> 00:11:06,120
  1188. I love you.
  1189.  
  1190. 267
  1191. 00:11:06,120 --> 00:11:08,660
  1192. - Mmm.
  1193. - Okay.
  1194.  
  1195. 268
  1196. 00:11:08,660 --> 00:11:09,990
  1197. You think your mom's
  1198. gonna like me?
  1199.  
  1200. 269
  1201. 00:11:09,990 --> 00:11:11,090
  1202. No.
  1203.  
  1204. 270
  1205. 00:11:11,100 --> 00:11:12,160
  1206. (DOOR OPENS)
  1207.  
  1208. 271
  1209. 00:11:12,160 --> 00:11:13,730
  1210. I'm sorry we're late.
  1211.  
  1212. 272
  1213. 00:11:13,730 --> 00:11:15,460
  1214. Hank drives like a girl.
  1215.  
  1216. 273
  1217. 00:11:15,470 --> 00:11:16,570
  1218. Merry Christmas,
  1219. grandma and grandpa!
  1220.  
  1221. 274
  1222. 00:11:16,570 --> 00:11:17,900
  1223. Merry Christmas, grandpa!
  1224.  
  1225. 275
  1226. 00:11:17,900 --> 00:11:18,940
  1227. - Merry Christmas!
  1228. - Merry Christmas!
  1229.  
  1230. 276
  1231. 00:11:18,940 --> 00:11:20,100
  1232. Merry Christmas, dad.
  1233.  
  1234. 277
  1235. 00:11:20,110 --> 00:11:21,900
  1236. Here, have some X-Boxes.
  1237.  
  1238. 278
  1239. 00:11:21,910 --> 00:11:23,570
  1240. - Are you serious?
  1241. - Thank you so much.
  1242.  
  1243. 279
  1244. 00:11:23,580 --> 00:11:25,010
  1245. Mum would never let us
  1246. have these.
  1247.  
  1248. 280
  1249. 00:11:25,010 --> 00:11:26,840
  1250. DYLAN:
  1251. Thank you.
  1252.  
  1253. 281
  1254. 00:11:26,850 --> 00:11:29,280
  1255. Hi, Ms. Redmond, I'm Jessie.
  1256.  
  1257. 282
  1258. 00:11:29,280 --> 00:11:30,750
  1259. It's so nice to meet you.
  1260.  
  1261. 283
  1262. 00:11:30,750 --> 00:11:34,020
  1263. Please take the bags
  1264. upstairs. Gracias.
  1265.  
  1266. 284
  1267. 00:11:35,490 --> 00:11:37,120
  1268. Okay. Hi, mom.
  1269.  
  1270. 285
  1271. 00:11:37,120 --> 00:11:38,660
  1272. - Amy.
  1273. - Hi.
  1274.  
  1275. 286
  1276. 00:11:38,660 --> 00:11:40,120
  1277. - You look pale.
  1278. - Oh.
  1279.  
  1280. 287
  1281. 00:11:40,120 --> 00:11:41,660
  1282. I'm just trying out
  1283. a new skin thing.
  1284.  
  1285. 288
  1286. 00:11:41,660 --> 00:11:43,090
  1287. Oh, good, it's just bad makeup.
  1288.  
  1289. 289
  1290. 00:11:43,090 --> 00:11:44,160
  1291. You're not dying.
  1292.  
  1293. 290
  1294. 00:11:44,160 --> 00:11:45,460
  1295. Where's your tree?
  1296.  
  1297. 291
  1298. 00:11:45,460 --> 00:11:47,330
  1299. I-I haven't had time
  1300. to get one yet.
  1301.  
  1302. 292
  1303. 00:11:47,330 --> 00:11:49,100
  1304. Amy, it's December 19th.
  1305.  
  1306. 293
  1307. 00:11:49,100 --> 00:11:51,500
  1308. Even the Jews have
  1309. Christmas trees by now.
  1310.  
  1311. 294
  1312. 00:11:51,500 --> 00:11:52,830
  1313. Never mind,
  1314. we'll get one tomorrow.
  1315.  
  1316. 295
  1317. 00:11:52,840 --> 00:11:54,970
  1318. - Okay.
  1319. - Huh.
  1320.  
  1321. 296
  1322. 00:11:54,970 --> 00:11:57,310
  1323. Yeah. Do you have any food?
  1324.  
  1325. 297
  1326. 00:11:57,310 --> 00:11:58,940
  1327. I haven't eaten
  1328. in three days.
  1329.  
  1330. 298
  1331. 00:11:58,940 --> 00:12:01,540
  1332. Yeah. Oh, gosh, yes. I actual...
  1333. I have all your favorites.
  1334.  
  1335. 299
  1336. 00:12:01,550 --> 00:12:03,650
  1337. (CHUCKLES)
  1338. It's adorable.
  1339.  
  1340. 300
  1341. 00:12:03,650 --> 00:12:05,180
  1342. You let your kids cook.
  1343.  
  1344. 301
  1345. 00:12:07,350 --> 00:12:09,050
  1346. Okay.
  1347.  
  1348. 302
  1349. 00:12:09,050 --> 00:12:12,820
  1350. Oh, I didn't know Rite Aid
  1351. made Christmas decorations.
  1352.  
  1353. 303
  1354. 00:12:12,820 --> 00:12:14,690
  1355. So I have the whole week
  1356. planned out.
  1357.  
  1358. 304
  1359. 00:12:14,690 --> 00:12:16,560
  1360. On Thursday,
  1361. we'll see "The Nutcracker."
  1362.  
  1363. 305
  1364. 00:12:16,560 --> 00:12:18,800
  1365. And then, of course, on Friday,
  1366. we'll all go caroling.
  1367.  
  1368. 306
  1369. 00:12:18,800 --> 00:12:20,700
  1370. Unfortunately,
  1371. Mike was our baritone
  1372.  
  1373. 307
  1374. 00:12:20,700 --> 00:12:22,170
  1375. and you're divorcing him.
  1376.  
  1377. 308
  1378. 00:12:22,170 --> 00:12:24,030
  1379. So we're gonna have to fill
  1380. that hole
  1381.  
  1382. 309
  1383. 00:12:24,030 --> 00:12:26,140
  1384. if we're gonna win
  1385. the Caroling Cup this year.
  1386.  
  1387. 310
  1388. 00:12:26,140 --> 00:12:27,800
  1389. Oh, God, the Caroling Cup?
  1390.  
  1391. 311
  1392. 00:12:27,810 --> 00:12:29,470
  1393. Darling, when I lived here
  1394.  
  1395. 312
  1396. 00:12:29,470 --> 00:12:33,340
  1397. we won the Caroling Cup
  1398. nine times.
  1399.  
  1400. 313
  1401. 00:12:33,340 --> 00:12:34,710
  1402. It's too bad
  1403. you've given up on
  1404.  
  1405. 314
  1406. 00:12:34,710 --> 00:12:36,480
  1407. our family's
  1408. tradition of winning.
  1409.  
  1410. 315
  1411. 00:12:36,480 --> 00:12:38,580
  1412. Yeah, I guess I've just
  1413. been a little busy, so...
  1414.  
  1415. 316
  1416. 00:12:38,580 --> 00:12:42,080
  1417. Well, clearly not
  1418. at the gym. Whoop.
  1419.  
  1420. 317
  1421. 00:12:42,090 --> 00:12:45,150
  1422. I want to celebrate my
  1423. triumphant return to Chicago.
  1424.  
  1425. 318
  1426. 00:12:45,160 --> 00:12:47,720
  1427. I wanna throw an enormous
  1428. Christmas party at your house.
  1429.  
  1430. 319
  1431. 00:12:47,730 --> 00:12:50,690
  1432. So I was thinking Christmas Eve,
  1433. if that's convenient.
  1434.  
  1435. 320
  1436. 00:12:50,700 --> 00:12:52,900
  1437. What? No.
  1438. That's not convenient.
  1439.  
  1440. 321
  1441. 00:12:52,900 --> 00:12:54,930
  1442. I mean, we can invite
  1443. all of my old friends
  1444.  
  1445. 322
  1446. 00:12:54,930 --> 00:12:56,670
  1447. and we can have a sushi station
  1448.  
  1449. 323
  1450. 00:12:56,670 --> 00:12:58,270
  1451. and we can hire Kenny G
  1452.  
  1453. 324
  1454. 00:12:58,270 --> 00:12:59,740
  1455. to play Christmas music.
  1456.  
  1457. 325
  1458. 00:12:59,740 --> 00:13:01,700
  1459. I hear he's not even
  1460. that expensive anymore.
  1461.  
  1462. 326
  1463. 00:13:01,710 --> 00:13:03,870
  1464. Yeah, okay, that-that sounds
  1465. like a lot of work.
  1466.  
  1467. 327
  1468. 00:13:03,870 --> 00:13:06,540
  1469. Yeah. It's too bad,
  1470. I've already invited everyone.
  1471.  
  1472. 328
  1473. 00:13:06,540 --> 00:13:08,210
  1474. - Where, to my house?
  1475. - Yes.
  1476.  
  1477. 329
  1478. 00:13:08,210 --> 00:13:10,280
  1479. A 184 people are coming.
  1480.  
  1481. 330
  1482. 00:13:10,280 --> 00:13:11,550
  1483. What?
  1484.  
  1485. 331
  1486. 00:13:11,550 --> 00:13:12,850
  1487. Why haven't I gotten
  1488. a Christmas card
  1489.  
  1490. 332
  1491. 00:13:12,850 --> 00:13:13,880
  1492. from you yet?
  1493.  
  1494. 333
  1495. 00:13:13,880 --> 00:13:15,220
  1496. I don't know, mom.
  1497.  
  1498. 334
  1499. 00:13:15,220 --> 00:13:16,790
  1500. I-I-I guess it just fell
  1501. through the cracks.
  1502.  
  1503. 335
  1504. 00:13:16,790 --> 00:13:18,450
  1505. What is happening with you?
  1506.  
  1507. 336
  1508. 00:13:18,460 --> 00:13:19,920
  1509. Nothing.
  1510. Nothing's happening to me.
  1511.  
  1512. 337
  1513. 00:13:19,920 --> 00:13:21,290
  1514. Amy, this is Christmas.
  1515.  
  1516. 338
  1517. 00:13:21,290 --> 00:13:23,260
  1518. It's the big show.
  1519.  
  1520. 339
  1521. 00:13:23,260 --> 00:13:25,860
  1522. - I know.
  1523. - You can't dick around.
  1524.  
  1525. 340
  1526. 00:13:25,860 --> 00:13:27,760
  1527. - I'm not dicking around.
  1528. - I feel you're dicking around.
  1529.  
  1530. 341
  1531. 00:13:27,770 --> 00:13:29,360
  1532. Mom, I'm honestly
  1533. not dicking around.
  1534.  
  1535. 342
  1536. 00:13:29,370 --> 00:13:30,770
  1537. Yes, you are dicking around.
  1538.  
  1539. 343
  1540. 00:13:30,770 --> 00:13:32,030
  1541. I can tell
  1542. when you're dicking around.
  1543.  
  1544. 344
  1545. 00:13:32,040 --> 00:13:33,570
  1546. I'm not dicking around.
  1547.  
  1548. 345
  1549. 00:13:33,570 --> 00:13:34,900
  1550. - Dick, dick around.
  1551. - Okay.
  1552.  
  1553. 346
  1554. 00:13:34,910 --> 00:13:36,940
  1555. Okay.
  1556.  
  1557. 347
  1558. 00:13:36,940 --> 00:13:38,140
  1559. I'm not dicking around.
  1560.  
  1561. 348
  1562. 00:13:38,140 --> 00:13:40,280
  1563. Alright, enough
  1564. with the bad language.
  1565.  
  1566. 349
  1567. 00:13:40,280 --> 00:13:42,310
  1568. Okay.
  1569.  
  1570. 350
  1571. 00:13:42,310 --> 00:13:44,650
  1572. - I like your hair.
  1573. - Really?
  1574.  
  1575. 351
  1576. 00:13:44,650 --> 00:13:47,450
  1577. Yeah, it looks like
  1578. you're not trying so hard.
  1579.  
  1580. 352
  1581. 00:13:47,450 --> 00:13:49,220
  1582. Yeah. Love you.
  1583.  
  1584. 353
  1585. 00:13:52,260 --> 00:13:53,330
  1586. Oh...
  1587.  
  1588. 354
  1589. 00:13:57,160 --> 00:13:58,830
  1590. AMY: I can't do Christmas
  1591. with my mother.
  1592.  
  1593. 355
  1594. 00:14:00,400 --> 00:14:02,270
  1595. It's like living
  1596. with Saddam Hussein.
  1597.  
  1598. 356
  1599. 00:14:02,270 --> 00:14:03,670
  1600. My mom is only staying
  1601. with me
  1602.  
  1603. 357
  1604. 00:14:03,670 --> 00:14:05,940
  1605. because I think
  1606. she wants to steal my TV.
  1607.  
  1608. 358
  1609. 00:14:05,940 --> 00:14:07,600
  1610. Oh, I have to go
  1611. Christmas tree shopping
  1612.  
  1613. 359
  1614. 00:14:07,610 --> 00:14:08,970
  1615. with my mother tonight.
  1616.  
  1617. 360
  1618. 00:14:08,970 --> 00:14:10,170
  1619. Yeah, it's like,
  1620. it's like going
  1621.  
  1622. 361
  1623. 00:14:10,170 --> 00:14:12,140
  1624. on a seven-hour death march
  1625.  
  1626. 362
  1627. 00:14:12,140 --> 00:14:13,310
  1628. around the city.
  1629.  
  1630. 363
  1631. 00:14:13,310 --> 00:14:14,440
  1632. My daughter really wants
  1633.  
  1634. 364
  1635. 00:14:14,450 --> 00:14:16,110
  1636. a Happy Happy Princess Doll
  1637.  
  1638. 365
  1639. 00:14:16,110 --> 00:14:18,250
  1640. and I have looked everywhere
  1641.  
  1642. 366
  1643. 00:14:18,250 --> 00:14:21,920
  1644. for it and I don't know
  1645. where it is.
  1646.  
  1647. 367
  1648. 00:14:23,090 --> 00:14:24,650
  1649. (SOBBING)
  1650. Where is she, guys?
  1651.  
  1652. 368
  1653. 00:14:24,660 --> 00:14:26,090
  1654. Where is Happy Happy Princess?
  1655.  
  1656. 369
  1657. 00:14:26,090 --> 00:14:27,590
  1658. Oh, my God.
  1659.  
  1660. 370
  1661. 00:14:27,590 --> 00:14:29,860
  1662. I know it's just a doll,
  1663. but God.
  1664.  
  1665. 371
  1666. 00:14:29,860 --> 00:14:32,490
  1667. Christmas is
  1668. killing me this year.
  1669.  
  1670. 372
  1671. 00:14:32,500 --> 00:14:33,800
  1672. (KELLY CLARKSON SINGS
  1673. "RUN RUN RUDOLPH")
  1674.  
  1675. 373
  1676. 00:14:33,800 --> 00:14:36,000
  1677. Holy fuck.
  1678.  
  1679. 374
  1680. 00:14:36,000 --> 00:14:37,770
  1681. ♪ Out of all the reindeer ♪
  1682.  
  1683. 375
  1684. 00:14:37,770 --> 00:14:40,610
  1685. ♪ You know
  1686. you're the mastermind ♪
  1687.  
  1688. 376
  1689. 00:14:42,670 --> 00:14:44,370
  1690. ♪ Run run Rudolph ♪
  1691.  
  1692. 377
  1693. 00:14:44,370 --> 00:14:46,850
  1694. ♪ Randolph's
  1695. not too far behind ♪
  1696.  
  1697. 378
  1698. 00:14:49,210 --> 00:14:50,980
  1699. ♪ Run run Rudolph ♪
  1700.  
  1701. 379
  1702. 00:14:50,980 --> 00:14:52,520
  1703. ♪ Santa's got to make it
  1704. to town ♪
  1705.  
  1706. 380
  1707. 00:14:52,520 --> 00:14:54,880
  1708. I can't do this shit sober.
  1709.  
  1710. 381
  1711. 00:14:54,890 --> 00:14:56,190
  1712. Me neither.
  1713.  
  1714. 382
  1715. 00:14:56,190 --> 00:14:57,850
  1716. You guys wanna get drunk
  1717. at the food court?
  1718.  
  1719. 383
  1720. 00:14:57,860 --> 00:14:59,690
  1721. - Fuck yeah!
  1722. - Yeah.
  1723.  
  1724. 384
  1725. 00:14:59,690 --> 00:15:01,060
  1726. - Come on.
  1727. - Ooh, fun!
  1728.  
  1729. 385
  1730. 00:15:03,490 --> 00:15:05,400
  1731. (INDISTINCT CHATTER)
  1732.  
  1733. 386
  1734. 00:15:09,000 --> 00:15:10,670
  1735. You guys, you know
  1736. what drives me crazy?
  1737.  
  1738. 387
  1739. 00:15:10,670 --> 00:15:12,300
  1740. - Genital warts?
  1741. - What?
  1742.  
  1743. 388
  1744. 00:15:12,300 --> 00:15:14,300
  1745. - Genital warts.
  1746. - No.
  1747.  
  1748. 389
  1749. 00:15:14,300 --> 00:15:15,540
  1750. Carla, no.
  1751.  
  1752. 390
  1753. 00:15:15,540 --> 00:15:17,070
  1754. No, w-w-what drives me crazy
  1755.  
  1756. 391
  1757. 00:15:17,080 --> 00:15:18,570
  1758. is the-is the pressure
  1759. that we put on ourselves
  1760.  
  1761. 392
  1762. 00:15:18,580 --> 00:15:20,740
  1763. to make Christmas perfect, guys.
  1764.  
  1765. 393
  1766. 00:15:20,740 --> 00:15:22,480
  1767. Look, Christmas
  1768. is supposed to be fun.
  1769.  
  1770. 394
  1771. 00:15:22,480 --> 00:15:24,850
  1772. Yes, why am I responsible
  1773.  
  1774. 395
  1775. 00:15:24,850 --> 00:15:26,750
  1776. for getting
  1777. every gift for everyone
  1778.  
  1779. 396
  1780. 00:15:26,750 --> 00:15:28,420
  1781. in my entire family?
  1782.  
  1783. 397
  1784. 00:15:28,420 --> 00:15:29,750
  1785. I mean,
  1786. just 'cause I'm a girl?
  1787.  
  1788. 398
  1789. 00:15:29,750 --> 00:15:31,420
  1790. - Yeah.
  1791. - It's 2017!
  1792.  
  1793. 399
  1794. 00:15:31,420 --> 00:15:32,490
  1795. I thought so.
  1796.  
  1797. 400
  1798. 00:15:32,490 --> 00:15:33,520
  1799. Why can't my husband
  1800.  
  1801. 401
  1802. 00:15:33,520 --> 00:15:34,890
  1803. buy presents for his own mom?
  1804.  
  1805. 402
  1806. 00:15:34,890 --> 00:15:36,090
  1807. I don't even like his mom.
  1808.  
  1809. 403
  1810. 00:15:36,090 --> 00:15:37,830
  1811. She blames her farts on my kids.
  1812.  
  1813. 404
  1814. 00:15:37,830 --> 00:15:39,030
  1815. - What?
  1816. - You know what I do?
  1817.  
  1818. 405
  1819. 00:15:39,030 --> 00:15:40,700
  1820. - With my big dumb son?
  1821. - What?
  1822.  
  1823. 406
  1824. 00:15:40,700 --> 00:15:42,930
  1825. Every November,
  1826. I just go into his room
  1827.  
  1828. 407
  1829. 00:15:42,930 --> 00:15:44,830
  1830. grab a bunch of random crap
  1831.  
  1832. 408
  1833. 00:15:44,840 --> 00:15:46,600
  1834. wrap it up,
  1835. give it to him on Christmas.
  1836.  
  1837. 409
  1838. 00:15:46,600 --> 00:15:48,240
  1839. - He doesn't even notice.
  1840. - Seriously?
  1841.  
  1842. 410
  1843. 00:15:48,240 --> 00:15:49,770
  1844. Oh, my God, I've given him
  1845. the same baseball glove
  1846.  
  1847. 411
  1848. 00:15:49,770 --> 00:15:51,540
  1849. like nine times.
  1850.  
  1851. 412
  1852. 00:15:51,540 --> 00:15:53,880
  1853. And how lame are the gifts
  1854. that your family gives you?
  1855.  
  1856. 413
  1857. 00:15:53,880 --> 00:15:56,280
  1858. I spend months picking out
  1859. the perfect gift
  1860.  
  1861. 414
  1862. 00:15:56,280 --> 00:15:59,110
  1863. for everyone in my family
  1864. and all I ever get
  1865.  
  1866. 415
  1867. 00:15:59,120 --> 00:16:01,080
  1868. is coupons
  1869. for free back rubs.
  1870.  
  1871. 416
  1872. 00:16:01,090 --> 00:16:03,080
  1873. Oh, that's so wrong.
  1874.  
  1875. 417
  1876. 00:16:03,090 --> 00:16:04,720
  1877. You know what my son gave me
  1878. last year for Christmas?
  1879.  
  1880. 418
  1881. 00:16:04,720 --> 00:16:07,020
  1882. A box of Ziploc baggies.
  1883.  
  1884. 419
  1885. 00:16:07,020 --> 00:16:08,590
  1886. Think I'll probably
  1887. just wrap it up
  1888.  
  1889. 420
  1890. 00:16:08,590 --> 00:16:11,590
  1891. and give it back to him again
  1892. this Christmas.
  1893.  
  1894. 421
  1895. 00:16:11,600 --> 00:16:14,530
  1896. You guys, I'm just like
  1897. a-a-a giant stress ball
  1898.  
  1899. 422
  1900. 00:16:14,530 --> 00:16:17,630
  1901. from November to New Year's.
  1902.  
  1903. 423
  1904. 00:16:17,630 --> 00:16:20,400
  1905. I just wanna enjoy
  1906. Christmas again.
  1907.  
  1908. 424
  1909. 00:16:20,400 --> 00:16:22,310
  1910. Yeah.
  1911.  
  1912. 425
  1913. 00:16:22,310 --> 00:16:23,310
  1914. (SIGHS)
  1915.  
  1916. 426
  1917. 00:16:25,140 --> 00:16:27,210
  1918. Well, then let's do it.
  1919.  
  1920. 427
  1921. 00:16:27,210 --> 00:16:28,440
  1922. What?
  1923.  
  1924. 428
  1925. 00:16:28,450 --> 00:16:29,880
  1926. Guys, what is wrong with us?
  1927.  
  1928. 429
  1929. 00:16:29,880 --> 00:16:31,810
  1930. Have we learned nothing?
  1931. This is bullshit.
  1932.  
  1933. 430
  1934. 00:16:31,820 --> 00:16:34,880
  1935. I am disappointed
  1936. in this threesome.
  1937.  
  1938. 431
  1939. 00:16:34,890 --> 00:16:36,750
  1940. We are mothers.
  1941.  
  1942. 432
  1943. 00:16:36,750 --> 00:16:39,220
  1944. And if things are not going
  1945. our way, then what do we do?
  1946.  
  1947. 433
  1948. 00:16:39,220 --> 00:16:41,060
  1949. We hide in the bathroom.
  1950.  
  1951. 434
  1952. 00:16:41,060 --> 00:16:42,290
  1953. - No.
  1954. - No.
  1955.  
  1956. 435
  1957. 00:16:42,290 --> 00:16:43,630
  1958. No, we don't,
  1959. we don't do that.
  1960.  
  1961. 436
  1962. 00:16:43,630 --> 00:16:45,660
  1963. - Uh-unh.
  1964. - We s... No, we stand up.
  1965.  
  1966. 437
  1967. 00:16:45,660 --> 00:16:48,230
  1968. - And we fight back.
  1969. - Fight back. Yes.
  1970.  
  1971. 438
  1972. 00:16:48,230 --> 00:16:51,830
  1973. So if we wanna do Christmas
  1974. our way this year
  1975.  
  1976. 439
  1977. 00:16:51,840 --> 00:16:54,600
  1978. then we're gonna do
  1979. Christmas our way.
  1980.  
  1981. 440
  1982. 00:16:54,610 --> 00:16:57,910
  1983. No more perfect gifts,
  1984. no more perfect decorations
  1985.  
  1986. 441
  1987. 00:16:57,910 --> 00:16:59,410
  1988. no more perfect anything.
  1989.  
  1990. 442
  1991. 00:16:59,410 --> 00:17:01,980
  1992. - Fuck it.
  1993. - Let's take Christmas back.
  1994.  
  1995. 443
  1996. 00:17:01,980 --> 00:17:03,780
  1997. Let's put the "ass" back.
  1998.  
  1999. 444
  2000. 00:17:03,780 --> 00:17:06,450
  2001. - In "Christm-ass."
  2002. - What?
  2003.  
  2004. 445
  2005. 00:17:06,450 --> 00:17:09,120
  2006. That didn't come out exactly as
  2007. I planned, but y-you guys get...
  2008.  
  2009. 446
  2010. 00:17:09,120 --> 00:17:10,920
  2011. - Yeah, we know what you meant.
  2012. - Yeah, we get you.
  2013.  
  2014. 447
  2015. 00:17:10,920 --> 00:17:12,590
  2016. Okay, to taking Christmas back.
  2017.  
  2018. 448
  2019. 00:17:12,590 --> 00:17:13,620
  2020. Yes!
  2021.  
  2022. 449
  2023. 00:17:15,430 --> 00:17:17,360
  2024. ♪ Go go go go ♪
  2025.  
  2026. 450
  2027. 00:17:17,360 --> 00:17:19,830
  2028. - ♪ Go go ♪
  2029. - ♪ Do something crazy ♪
  2030.  
  2031. 451
  2032. 00:17:19,830 --> 00:17:22,530
  2033. Merry Christmas!
  2034.  
  2035. 452
  2036. 00:17:22,530 --> 00:17:25,430
  2037. ♪ I wanna live like
  2038. it's Mardi Gras and ♪
  2039.  
  2040. 453
  2041. 00:17:25,440 --> 00:17:27,040
  2042. ♪ Don't need no R and R ♪
  2043.  
  2044. 454
  2045. 00:17:27,040 --> 00:17:28,800
  2046. - What?
  2047. - Yes.
  2048.  
  2049. 455
  2050. 00:17:28,810 --> 00:17:29,870
  2051. Now, it's gonna be better.
  2052.  
  2053. 456
  2054. 00:17:29,870 --> 00:17:31,140
  2055. Now, it is gonna be better.
  2056.  
  2057. 457
  2058. 00:17:31,140 --> 00:17:32,270
  2059. ♪ Good vibes only ♪
  2060.  
  2061. 458
  2062. 00:17:32,280 --> 00:17:34,180
  2063. ♪ I just tapped a keg ♪
  2064.  
  2065. 459
  2066. 00:17:34,180 --> 00:17:36,040
  2067. ♪ I'mma fill my cup ♪
  2068.  
  2069. 460
  2070. 00:17:36,050 --> 00:17:38,110
  2071. ♪ Got fireworks got booze ♪
  2072.  
  2073. 461
  2074. 00:17:38,120 --> 00:17:39,980
  2075. ♪ Let's blow some shit up ♪
  2076.  
  2077. 462
  2078. 00:17:39,980 --> 00:17:41,880
  2079. ♪ Tonight I'm going stupid ♪
  2080.  
  2081. 463
  2082. 00:17:41,890 --> 00:17:44,120
  2083. ♪ Doing things
  2084. I've never done ♪
  2085.  
  2086. 464
  2087. 00:17:44,120 --> 00:17:46,220
  2088. ♪ We all got one thing
  2089. in common ♪
  2090.  
  2091. 465
  2092. 00:17:46,220 --> 00:17:48,690
  2093. ♪ We just wanna have fun hey ♪
  2094.  
  2095. 466
  2096. 00:17:50,360 --> 00:17:52,330
  2097. Okay, who's next?
  2098.  
  2099. 467
  2100. 00:17:55,330 --> 00:17:57,500
  2101. ♪ Do something crazy ♪
  2102.  
  2103. 468
  2104. 00:17:57,500 --> 00:17:59,640
  2105. ♪ Hey ♪
  2106.  
  2107. 469
  2108. 00:17:59,640 --> 00:18:01,670
  2109. ♪ Whoo ♪
  2110.  
  2111. 470
  2112. 00:18:01,670 --> 00:18:02,910
  2113. ♪ Hey ♪
  2114.  
  2115. 471
  2116. 00:18:02,910 --> 00:18:04,170
  2117. ♪ Do something crazy ♪
  2118.  
  2119. 472
  2120. 00:18:04,180 --> 00:18:06,080
  2121. ♪ Do something crazy ♪
  2122.  
  2123. 473
  2124. 00:18:06,080 --> 00:18:08,210
  2125. - ♪ Do something wild ♪
  2126. - ♪ Whoo ♪
  2127.  
  2128. 474
  2129. 00:18:08,210 --> 00:18:10,180
  2130. - ♪ Be someone different ♪
  2131. - ♪ Hey ♪
  2132.  
  2133. 475
  2134. 00:18:10,180 --> 00:18:12,310
  2135. - ♪ Switch up that style ♪
  2136. - ♪ Hey ♪
  2137.  
  2138. 476
  2139. 00:18:12,320 --> 00:18:16,590
  2140. Hey! Do you know which one
  2141. is better for the vagina?
  2142.  
  2143. 477
  2144. 00:18:16,590 --> 00:18:19,090
  2145. (LAUGHS)
  2146.  
  2147. 478
  2148. 00:18:19,090 --> 00:18:21,520
  2149. ♪ Do something crazy ♪
  2150.  
  2151. 479
  2152. 00:18:21,530 --> 00:18:23,560
  2153. ♪ Hey ♪
  2154.  
  2155. 480
  2156. 00:18:23,560 --> 00:18:26,030
  2157. ♪ Whoo ♪
  2158.  
  2159. 481
  2160. 00:18:26,030 --> 00:18:29,400
  2161. - Attention, shoppers!
  2162. - Excuse me!
  2163.  
  2164. 482
  2165. 00:18:29,400 --> 00:18:31,530
  2166. CARLA:
  2167. I am drunk and horny!
  2168.  
  2169. 483
  2170. 00:18:31,540 --> 00:18:33,540
  2171. I repeat,
  2172. I am drunk and horny!
  2173.  
  2174. 484
  2175. 00:18:34,870 --> 00:18:37,210
  2176. (INDISTINCT CHATTER)
  2177.  
  2178. 485
  2179. 00:18:37,210 --> 00:18:38,540
  2180. ♪ Break it down ♪
  2181.  
  2182. 486
  2183. 00:18:45,180 --> 00:18:46,550
  2184. - ♪ Do something crazy ♪
  2185. - ♪ Go ♪
  2186.  
  2187. 487
  2188. 00:18:46,550 --> 00:18:50,190
  2189. ♪ Go go go go go go go ♪
  2190.  
  2191. 488
  2192. 00:18:50,190 --> 00:18:54,120
  2193. ♪ Go go go go go
  2194. go go go go ♪
  2195.  
  2196. 489
  2197. 00:18:54,130 --> 00:18:56,360
  2198. Oh, shit. Wait, you guys.
  2199. Wait, wait, wait, wait.
  2200.  
  2201. 490
  2202. 00:18:56,360 --> 00:18:57,890
  2203. I still have to go
  2204. Christmas tree shopping
  2205.  
  2206. 491
  2207. 00:18:57,900 --> 00:18:59,860
  2208. with my mom.
  2209.  
  2210. 492
  2211. 00:18:59,860 --> 00:19:01,700
  2212. I just had a really dumb idea.
  2213.  
  2214. 493
  2215. 00:19:01,700 --> 00:19:04,230
  2216. ♪ Do something crazy ♪
  2217.  
  2218. 494
  2219. 00:19:04,240 --> 00:19:06,100
  2220. ♪ Hey ♪
  2221.  
  2222. 495
  2223. 00:19:06,100 --> 00:19:08,140
  2224. ♪ Whoo ♪
  2225.  
  2226. 496
  2227. 00:19:08,140 --> 00:19:09,640
  2228. ♪ Hey ♪
  2229.  
  2230. 497
  2231. 00:19:09,640 --> 00:19:10,810
  2232. ♪ Do something crazy ♪
  2233.  
  2234. 498
  2235. 00:19:10,810 --> 00:19:12,580
  2236. ♪ Do something
  2237. crazy ♪
  2238.  
  2239. 499
  2240. 00:19:12,580 --> 00:19:14,780
  2241. - ♪ Do something wild ♪
  2242. - ♪ Whoo ♪
  2243.  
  2244. 500
  2245. 00:19:14,780 --> 00:19:16,480
  2246. ♪ Do something crazy ♪
  2247.  
  2248. 501
  2249. 00:19:16,480 --> 00:19:18,310
  2250. (LAUGHING)
  2251.  
  2252. 502
  2253. 00:19:18,320 --> 00:19:19,620
  2254. ♪ Do something crazy ♪
  2255.  
  2256. 503
  2257. 00:19:22,990 --> 00:19:24,950
  2258. Alright, guys. Here.
  2259.  
  2260. 504
  2261. 00:19:24,960 --> 00:19:26,790
  2262. - Ooh, we got some popcorn.
  2263. - I got extra.
  2264.  
  2265. 505
  2266. 00:19:26,790 --> 00:19:27,890
  2267. - Yes.
  2268. - You guys ready?
  2269.  
  2270. 506
  2271. 00:19:27,890 --> 00:19:30,260
  2272. - Look at that.
  2273. - Okay.
  2274.  
  2275. 507
  2276. 00:19:30,260 --> 00:19:32,430
  2277. - This is really nice, mom.
  2278. - Yeah.
  2279.  
  2280. 508
  2281. 00:19:32,430 --> 00:19:34,100
  2282. We should do all Christmas
  2283. like this.
  2284.  
  2285. 509
  2286. 00:19:34,100 --> 00:19:36,130
  2287. Yeah, can we just
  2288. hang out together
  2289.  
  2290. 510
  2291. 00:19:36,130 --> 00:19:38,430
  2292. and skip all the annoying stuff?
  2293.  
  2294. 511
  2295. 00:19:38,440 --> 00:19:40,440
  2296. Yeah, you guys, I...
  2297.  
  2298. 512
  2299. 00:19:40,440 --> 00:19:42,400
  2300. I would actually
  2301. really like that.
  2302.  
  2303. 513
  2304. 00:19:42,410 --> 00:19:45,010
  2305. Hey, Jessie, you should come
  2306. over on Christmas.
  2307.  
  2308. 514
  2309. 00:19:46,110 --> 00:19:48,180
  2310. Um, yeah, yeah.
  2311.  
  2312. 515
  2313. 00:19:48,180 --> 00:19:49,580
  2314. I don't know.
  2315. It's kind of a big deal.
  2316.  
  2317. 516
  2318. 00:19:49,580 --> 00:19:51,310
  2319. I wouldn't want to impose.
  2320.  
  2321. 517
  2322. 00:19:51,310 --> 00:19:53,310
  2323. (SIGHS)
  2324. Don't be weird, dad.
  2325.  
  2326. 518
  2327. 00:19:53,320 --> 00:19:54,520
  2328. We'll be here.
  2329.  
  2330. 519
  2331. 00:19:54,520 --> 00:19:56,480
  2332. (CHUCKLES)
  2333.  
  2334. 520
  2335. 00:19:56,490 --> 00:19:59,190
  2336. - Is that okay?
  2337. - Yeah.
  2338.  
  2339. 521
  2340. 00:19:59,190 --> 00:20:01,160
  2341. Yeah, I would
  2342. actually love that.
  2343.  
  2344. 522
  2345. 00:20:01,160 --> 00:20:02,360
  2346. - Me, too.
  2347. - Okay.
  2348.  
  2349. 523
  2350. 00:20:04,030 --> 00:20:06,160
  2351. Good evening, everyo...
  2352.  
  2353. 524
  2354. 00:20:06,160 --> 00:20:09,330
  2355. RUTH:
  2356. What in God's name is that?
  2357.  
  2358. 525
  2359. 00:20:09,330 --> 00:20:11,430
  2360. Oh, that is our
  2361. new Christmas tree.
  2362.  
  2363. 526
  2364. 00:20:11,440 --> 00:20:13,000
  2365. I got it at Lady Foot Locker.
  2366.  
  2367. 527
  2368. 00:20:13,000 --> 00:20:14,870
  2369. - Do you like it?
  2370. - No, I don't, Amy.
  2371.  
  2372. 528
  2373. 00:20:14,870 --> 00:20:17,340
  2374. - I find it revolting.
  2375. - Oh.
  2376.  
  2377. 529
  2378. 00:20:17,340 --> 00:20:19,880
  2379. What is this thing
  2380. doing in your house?
  2381.  
  2382. 530
  2383. 00:20:19,880 --> 00:20:21,110
  2384. I don't know, I-I didn't wanna
  2385.  
  2386. 531
  2387. 00:20:21,110 --> 00:20:22,480
  2388. waste time tree shopping
  2389. this year.
  2390.  
  2391. 532
  2392. 00:20:22,480 --> 00:20:24,210
  2393. I actually wanted
  2394. to enjoy Christmas.
  2395.  
  2396. 533
  2397. 00:20:24,220 --> 00:20:25,980
  2398. Amy, you are a mom.
  2399.  
  2400. 534
  2401. 00:20:25,980 --> 00:20:28,020
  2402. Moms don't enjoy,
  2403. they give joy.
  2404.  
  2405. 535
  2406. 00:20:28,020 --> 00:20:29,520
  2407. That's how being a mom works.
  2408.  
  2409. 536
  2410. 00:20:29,520 --> 00:20:32,790
  2411. And this hideous tree
  2412. does not give joy to anybody.
  2413.  
  2414. 537
  2415. 00:20:32,790 --> 00:20:35,560
  2416. I don't know,
  2417. I-I kind of like it.
  2418.  
  2419. 538
  2420. 00:20:35,560 --> 00:20:36,720
  2421. - Thank you.
  2422. - Yeah.
  2423.  
  2424. 539
  2425. 00:20:36,730 --> 00:20:38,990
  2426. Who are you,
  2427. and why are you talking?
  2428.  
  2429. 540
  2430. 00:20:39,000 --> 00:20:41,560
  2431. Mom, please be nice.
  2432. This is Jessie. You met him.
  2433.  
  2434. 541
  2435. 00:20:41,570 --> 00:20:43,370
  2436. RUTH:
  2437. I'm tired of this conversation.
  2438.  
  2439. 542
  2440. 00:20:43,370 --> 00:20:44,800
  2441. But if you think for one second
  2442.  
  2443. 543
  2444. 00:20:44,800 --> 00:20:46,840
  2445. I'm gonna let
  2446. your lazy shenanigans
  2447.  
  2448. 544
  2449. 00:20:46,840 --> 00:20:48,740
  2450. ruin Christmas
  2451. for this entire family
  2452.  
  2453. 545
  2454. 00:20:48,740 --> 00:20:51,040
  2455. you are very much mistaken.
  2456.  
  2457. 546
  2458. 00:20:51,040 --> 00:20:52,510
  2459. Goodnight, dear children.
  2460.  
  2461. 547
  2462. 00:20:52,510 --> 00:20:54,640
  2463. Here, have some
  2464. iTunes gift cards.
  2465.  
  2466. 548
  2467. 00:20:54,650 --> 00:20:57,180
  2468. Mom, seriously? You have to
  2469. stop giving them gifts.
  2470.  
  2471. 549
  2472. 00:20:57,180 --> 00:20:58,480
  2473. DYLAN:
  2474. Thanks, grandma.
  2475.  
  2476. 550
  2477. 00:20:58,480 --> 00:20:59,980
  2478. Honey, did you see
  2479. these ornaments?
  2480.  
  2481. 551
  2482. 00:20:59,980 --> 00:21:01,650
  2483. They are all little shoes.
  2484.  
  2485. 552
  2486. 00:21:01,650 --> 00:21:02,920
  2487. I swear to God, Hank.
  2488.  
  2489. 553
  2490. 00:21:02,920 --> 00:21:04,420
  2491. I will drive you
  2492. to a fire station
  2493.  
  2494. 554
  2495. 00:21:04,420 --> 00:21:06,160
  2496. and I will leave you there.
  2497.  
  2498. 555
  2499. 00:21:10,760 --> 00:21:12,500
  2500. - Hi.
  2501. - Hi.
  2502.  
  2503. 556
  2504. 00:21:14,360 --> 00:21:16,400
  2505. How was your night?
  2506.  
  2507. 557
  2508. 00:21:16,400 --> 00:21:17,700
  2509. - So good.
  2510. - Yeah?
  2511.  
  2512. 558
  2513. 00:21:17,700 --> 00:21:18,900
  2514. Yeah.
  2515.  
  2516. 559
  2517. 00:21:24,180 --> 00:21:26,240
  2518. Mmm.
  2519.  
  2520. 560
  2521. 00:21:26,240 --> 00:21:27,940
  2522. You taste like grape soda.
  2523.  
  2524. 561
  2525. 00:21:27,950 --> 00:21:29,910
  2526. I know. I had a Welch's
  2527. right before bed.
  2528.  
  2529. 562
  2530. 00:21:29,910 --> 00:21:31,350
  2531. (GASPS)
  2532.  
  2533. 563
  2534. 00:21:32,220 --> 00:21:33,690
  2535. (CHUCKLES)
  2536.  
  2537. 564
  2538. 00:21:37,550 --> 00:21:39,190
  2539. - Mmm.
  2540. - Hmm.
  2541.  
  2542. 565
  2543. 00:21:39,190 --> 00:21:40,360
  2544. (SANDY SNEEZING)
  2545.  
  2546. 566
  2547. 00:21:40,360 --> 00:21:41,690
  2548. - Bless you.
  2549. - Bless you.
  2550.  
  2551. 567
  2552. 00:21:45,360 --> 00:21:47,030
  2553. (GASPS)
  2554. Mom!
  2555.  
  2556. 568
  2557. 00:21:47,030 --> 00:21:48,560
  2558. Hi, guys.
  2559.  
  2560. 569
  2561. 00:21:48,570 --> 00:21:50,200
  2562. What are you doing in here?
  2563.  
  2564. 570
  2565. 00:21:50,200 --> 00:21:52,200
  2566. Well, I just came in here
  2567. to watch you fall asleep
  2568.  
  2569. 571
  2570. 00:21:52,200 --> 00:21:53,740
  2571. like I always do
  2572. and then you started
  2573.  
  2574. 572
  2575. 00:21:53,740 --> 00:21:56,110
  2576. going at it
  2577. like monkeys in a zoo.
  2578.  
  2579. 573
  2580. 00:21:56,110 --> 00:21:57,740
  2581. You watch me fall asleep
  2582. every night?
  2583.  
  2584. 574
  2585. 00:21:57,740 --> 00:21:59,470
  2586. Well, except after
  2587. Blue Bloods, I know
  2588.  
  2589. 575
  2590. 00:21:59,480 --> 00:22:01,910
  2591. that's your
  2592. special intercourse night.
  2593.  
  2594. 576
  2595. 00:22:01,910 --> 00:22:04,550
  2596. Oh, honey,
  2597. I'm so glad to see
  2598.  
  2599. 577
  2600. 00:22:04,550 --> 00:22:06,480
  2601. you have such a vibrant
  2602. sex life.
  2603.  
  2604. 578
  2605. 00:22:06,480 --> 00:22:08,750
  2606. It's so important
  2607. for you and Kent
  2608.  
  2609. 579
  2610. 00:22:08,750 --> 00:22:10,320
  2611. to just bang each other.
  2612.  
  2613. 580
  2614. 00:22:11,720 --> 00:22:13,450
  2615. And Kent.
  2616.  
  2617. 581
  2618. 00:22:13,460 --> 00:22:15,890
  2619. I am so happy
  2620.  
  2621. 582
  2622. 00:22:15,890 --> 00:22:18,430
  2623. that you're able to get
  2624. an erection again.
  2625.  
  2626. 583
  2627. 00:22:18,430 --> 00:22:20,600
  2628. Yay!
  2629.  
  2630. 584
  2631. 00:22:20,600 --> 00:22:22,830
  2632. And Kiki.
  2633.  
  2634. 585
  2635. 00:22:22,830 --> 00:22:24,570
  2636. He's so much bigger
  2637. than your dad was.
  2638.  
  2639. 586
  2640. 00:22:24,570 --> 00:22:26,100
  2641. Okay, mom, thanks, you can go
  2642.  
  2643. 587
  2644. 00:22:26,100 --> 00:22:28,100
  2645. before my husband never
  2646. has sex with me again.
  2647.  
  2648. 588
  2649. 00:22:28,100 --> 00:22:29,340
  2650. Yup.
  2651.  
  2652. 589
  2653. 00:22:31,270 --> 00:22:32,770
  2654. Oh, and, honey
  2655.  
  2656. 590
  2657. 00:22:32,780 --> 00:22:34,310
  2658. your dad liked it
  2659. when I tickled his balls.
  2660.  
  2661. 591
  2662. 00:22:34,310 --> 00:22:36,150
  2663. Okay, you need
  2664. to stop talking.
  2665.  
  2666. 592
  2667. 00:22:36,150 --> 00:22:37,950
  2668. I'm gonna come check on you guys
  2669. in a little while.
  2670.  
  2671. 593
  2672. 00:22:37,950 --> 00:22:39,620
  2673. Oh, please don't.
  2674.  
  2675. 594
  2676. 00:22:44,920 --> 00:22:47,090
  2677. Oh, wow.
  2678.  
  2679. 595
  2680. 00:22:47,090 --> 00:22:50,930
  2681. - You need to talk to your mom.
  2682. - I know.
  2683.  
  2684. 596
  2685. 00:22:50,930 --> 00:22:52,990
  2686. She needs some boundaries.
  2687.  
  2688. 597
  2689. 00:22:53,000 --> 00:22:56,260
  2690. - Or at least, a boundary.
  2691. - I know.
  2692.  
  2693. 598
  2694. 00:22:56,270 --> 00:22:58,530
  2695. I just, uh...
  2696.  
  2697. 599
  2698. 00:22:58,540 --> 00:23:00,700
  2699. I don't wanna hurt
  2700. her feelings.
  2701.  
  2702. 600
  2703. 00:23:00,710 --> 00:23:03,270
  2704. And, you know,
  2705. ever since my dad died
  2706.  
  2707. 601
  2708. 00:23:03,270 --> 00:23:05,710
  2709. I'm, like, pretty much
  2710. her only family.
  2711.  
  2712. 602
  2713. 00:23:05,710 --> 00:23:08,980
  2714. So I'm worried that if I
  2715. push her away even a little
  2716.  
  2717. 603
  2718. 00:23:08,980 --> 00:23:11,710
  2719. that it's gonna break
  2720. her heart.
  2721.  
  2722. 604
  2723. 00:23:11,720 --> 00:23:13,220
  2724. She saw my boner, Kiki.
  2725.  
  2726. 605
  2727. 00:23:14,720 --> 00:23:15,790
  2728. Yeah.
  2729.  
  2730. 606
  2731. 00:23:20,320 --> 00:23:21,330
  2732. (THUDDING)
  2733.  
  2734. 607
  2735. 00:23:23,130 --> 00:23:25,560
  2736. Oh, my God. What the...
  2737.  
  2738. 608
  2739. 00:23:30,230 --> 00:23:34,200
  2740. What... the fuck?
  2741.  
  2742. 609
  2743. 00:23:34,210 --> 00:23:37,140
  2744. (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
  2745.  
  2746. 610
  2747. 00:23:50,690 --> 00:23:52,390
  2748. Okay, bring the French hens
  2749.  
  2750. 611
  2751. 00:23:52,390 --> 00:23:54,590
  2752. three inches to the left.
  2753.  
  2754. 612
  2755. 00:23:54,590 --> 00:23:56,720
  2756. RUTH:
  2757. Yeah. Yeah.
  2758.  
  2759. 613
  2760. 00:23:56,730 --> 00:23:58,160
  2761. Mom?
  2762.  
  2763. 614
  2764. 00:24:00,160 --> 00:24:01,500
  2765. What are you doing?
  2766.  
  2767. 615
  2768. 00:24:01,500 --> 00:24:03,330
  2769. I am decorating
  2770. your house properly
  2771.  
  2772. 616
  2773. 00:24:03,330 --> 00:24:06,230
  2774. because apparently, you are
  2775. unwilling to do so yourself.
  2776.  
  2777. 617
  2778. 00:24:06,240 --> 00:24:08,500
  2779. Why does my house
  2780. have to be properly decorated?
  2781.  
  2782. 618
  2783. 00:24:08,510 --> 00:24:10,840
  2784. Making Christmas special
  2785. is how you show
  2786.  
  2787. 619
  2788. 00:24:10,840 --> 00:24:12,510
  2789. your family
  2790. that you love them, Amy.
  2791.  
  2792. 620
  2793. 00:24:12,510 --> 00:24:13,940
  2794. You don't want
  2795. your kids to think
  2796.  
  2797. 621
  2798. 00:24:13,940 --> 00:24:15,280
  2799. that they're worthless
  2800. and unloved.
  2801.  
  2802. 622
  2803. 00:24:15,280 --> 00:24:17,040
  2804. - Do you?
  2805. - Well, no, of course not.
  2806.  
  2807. 623
  2808. 00:24:17,050 --> 00:24:19,550
  2809. This is the time of year
  2810. when moms kill themselves
  2811.  
  2812. 624
  2813. 00:24:19,550 --> 00:24:22,380
  2814. to create a magical world
  2815. of joy for their children.
  2816.  
  2817. 625
  2818. 00:24:22,390 --> 00:24:24,450
  2819. It is not a time of year
  2820. when moms sit around
  2821.  
  2822. 626
  2823. 00:24:24,460 --> 00:24:25,890
  2824. in their pajamas
  2825. eating fudge.
  2826.  
  2827. 627
  2828. 00:24:25,890 --> 00:24:27,560
  2829. - I don't even like fudge.
  2830. - Great.
  2831.  
  2832. 628
  2833. 00:24:27,560 --> 00:24:29,220
  2834. So stop being a shitty mom.
  2835.  
  2836. 629
  2837. 00:24:29,230 --> 00:24:30,730
  2838. - Oh.
  2839. - Hey, kids.
  2840.  
  2841. 630
  2842. 00:24:30,730 --> 00:24:32,860
  2843. How do you like
  2844. the Christmas cavalcade, huh?
  2845.  
  2846. 631
  2847. 00:24:32,860 --> 00:24:35,360
  2848. - Oh, my gosh. It's awesome.
  2849. - Show mom how it works!
  2850.  
  2851. 632
  2852. 00:24:35,370 --> 00:24:37,570
  2853. Really, Amy,
  2854. you are gonna love this. Okay.
  2855.  
  2856. 633
  2857. 00:24:37,570 --> 00:24:41,300
  2858. We are go for
  2859. the cavalcade, over.
  2860.  
  2861. 634
  2862. 00:24:41,300 --> 00:24:44,370
  2863. Don't worry, I'll show you
  2864. how this works. It's on an app.
  2865.  
  2866. 635
  2867. 00:24:44,380 --> 00:24:46,280
  2868. (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
  2869.  
  2870. 636
  2871. 00:24:47,650 --> 00:24:49,910
  2872. Oh, you installed
  2873. outdoor speakers.
  2874.  
  2875. 637
  2876. 00:24:49,910 --> 00:24:51,580
  2877. Shh-shh, wait for it,
  2878. wait for it.
  2879.  
  2880. 638
  2881. 00:24:54,490 --> 00:24:57,150
  2882. ♪ Eleven pipers piping ♪
  2883.  
  2884. 639
  2885. 00:24:57,150 --> 00:24:59,950
  2886. ♪ Ten lords a-leaping
  2887. nine ladies dancing ♪
  2888.  
  2889. 640
  2890. 00:24:59,960 --> 00:25:02,590
  2891. ♪ Eight maids a-milking
  2892. seven swans a-swimming ♪
  2893.  
  2894. 641
  2895. 00:25:02,590 --> 00:25:03,960
  2896. ♪ Six geese a-laying ♪
  2897.  
  2898. 642
  2899. 00:25:03,960 --> 00:25:05,490
  2900. ♪ Five golden rings ♪
  2901.  
  2902. 643
  2903. 00:25:05,500 --> 00:25:06,730
  2904. ♪ Five golden rings ♪
  2905.  
  2906. 644
  2907. 00:25:06,730 --> 00:25:08,130
  2908. How much did this cost?
  2909.  
  2910. 645
  2911. 00:25:08,130 --> 00:25:09,500
  2912. How can you put a price tag
  2913.  
  2914. 646
  2915. 00:25:09,500 --> 00:25:11,970
  2916. on a child's happiness, Amy?
  2917.  
  2918. 647
  2919. 00:25:11,970 --> 00:25:14,900
  2920. - It was very expensive.
  2921. - God! Mom!
  2922.  
  2923. 648
  2924. 00:25:14,910 --> 00:25:17,410
  2925. Wait for it,
  2926. this is the big ending!
  2927.  
  2928. 649
  2929. 00:25:17,410 --> 00:25:18,510
  2930. (EXPLOSION)
  2931.  
  2932. 650
  2933. 00:25:18,510 --> 00:25:20,910
  2934. (LAUGHTER)
  2935.  
  2936. 651
  2937. 00:25:22,410 --> 00:25:25,250
  2938. AMY:
  2939. Are those actual partridges?
  2940.  
  2941. 652
  2942. 00:25:25,250 --> 00:25:26,810
  2943. Of course.
  2944.  
  2945. 653
  2946. 00:25:26,820 --> 00:25:28,620
  2947. They don't have
  2948. any survival skills.
  2949.  
  2950. 654
  2951. 00:25:28,620 --> 00:25:31,090
  2952. They'll be dead within an hour.
  2953.  
  2954. 655
  2955. 00:25:31,090 --> 00:25:32,320
  2956. - Okay.
  2957. - Here, kids.
  2958.  
  2959. 656
  2960. 00:25:32,320 --> 00:25:34,420
  2961. Have some breakfast candy.
  2962.  
  2963. 657
  2964. 00:25:34,430 --> 00:25:36,120
  2965. - I'm sorry, what?
  2966. - Oh, my God.
  2967.  
  2968. 658
  2969. 00:25:36,130 --> 00:25:37,590
  2970. Thank you, grandma.
  2971. I love you.
  2972.  
  2973. 659
  2974. 00:25:37,590 --> 00:25:40,430
  2975. I love you.
  2976. I love you, too, guys.
  2977.  
  2978. 660
  2979. 00:25:40,430 --> 00:25:42,130
  2980. Okay, let's reload the birds.
  2981.  
  2982. 661
  2983. 00:25:42,130 --> 00:25:43,170
  2984. And I hate that they're gray.
  2985.  
  2986. 662
  2987. 00:25:43,170 --> 00:25:44,770
  2988. Let's paint them all white.
  2989.  
  2990. 663
  2991. 00:25:44,770 --> 00:25:46,800
  2992. And can't they look
  2993. a little happier
  2994.  
  2995. 664
  2996. 00:25:46,800 --> 00:25:48,140
  2997. when they fly away?
  2998.  
  2999. 665
  3000. 00:25:48,140 --> 00:25:49,210
  3001. I mean, it is Christmas.
  3002.  
  3003. 666
  3004. 00:25:51,270 --> 00:25:53,940
  3005. Your mom decorated your house?
  3006.  
  3007. 667
  3008. 00:25:53,940 --> 00:25:56,210
  3009. Oh, no, no, no, no.
  3010. That is not okay.
  3011.  
  3012. 668
  3013. 00:25:56,210 --> 00:25:58,550
  3014. Who cares, let her
  3015. decorate your house.
  3016.  
  3017. 669
  3018. 00:25:58,550 --> 00:25:59,850
  3019. She wanna do mine next?
  3020.  
  3021. 670
  3022. 00:25:59,850 --> 00:26:01,350
  3023. It's-it's not about the house.
  3024.  
  3025. 671
  3026. 00:26:01,350 --> 00:26:03,780
  3027. It's-it's about the fact
  3028. that I'm a 34-year-old woman
  3029.  
  3030. 672
  3031. 00:26:03,790 --> 00:26:06,520
  3032. and my mother is still telling
  3033. me how to live my life.
  3034.  
  3035. 673
  3036. 00:26:06,520 --> 00:26:09,290
  3037. Well, then you need
  3038. to fight her.
  3039.  
  3040. 674
  3041. 00:26:09,290 --> 00:26:11,830
  3042. Like... physically?
  3043.  
  3044. 675
  3045. 00:26:11,830 --> 00:26:13,400
  3046. That is correct, Amy.
  3047.  
  3048. 676
  3049. 00:26:13,400 --> 00:26:15,030
  3050. I can teach you
  3051. some basic karate moves.
  3052.  
  3053. 677
  3054. 00:26:15,030 --> 00:26:16,800
  3055. But we all know that
  3056. she's gonna keep treating you
  3057.  
  3058. 678
  3059. 00:26:16,800 --> 00:26:19,230
  3060. like this until you beat
  3061. the shit out of her.
  3062.  
  3063. 679
  3064. 00:26:19,240 --> 00:26:21,240
  3065. I don't want you to meet my mom.
  3066.  
  3067. 680
  3068. 00:26:21,240 --> 00:26:24,010
  3069. She's a 62-year-old woman,
  3070. so...
  3071.  
  3072. 681
  3073. 00:26:24,010 --> 00:26:25,410
  3074. Fine, but you need to have
  3075.  
  3076. 682
  3077. 00:26:25,410 --> 00:26:27,740
  3078. at least a serious
  3079. conversation with her.
  3080.  
  3081. 683
  3082. 00:26:27,740 --> 00:26:29,540
  3083. - That sounds more legal.
  3084. - I know. I know.
  3085.  
  3086. 684
  3087. 00:26:29,550 --> 00:26:31,650
  3088. And where's your dad
  3089. in all this?
  3090.  
  3091. 685
  3092. 00:26:31,650 --> 00:26:33,510
  3093. Oh, my dad, he's so sweet.
  3094.  
  3095. 686
  3096. 00:26:33,520 --> 00:26:34,880
  3097. But he's completely
  3098. under her control.
  3099.  
  3100. 687
  3101. 00:26:34,890 --> 00:26:36,220
  3102. I mean, there's no way
  3103. he's gonna choose
  3104.  
  3105. 688
  3106. 00:26:36,220 --> 00:26:37,750
  3107. my side over hers, no.
  3108.  
  3109. 689
  3110. 00:26:37,750 --> 00:26:40,490
  3111. - Sweetie, that's hard.
  3112. - Oh...
  3113.  
  3114. 690
  3115. 00:26:40,490 --> 00:26:42,990
  3116. Moms are so weird.
  3117.  
  3118. 691
  3119. 00:26:42,990 --> 00:26:45,030
  3120. How's Christmas with your mom?
  3121.  
  3122. 692
  3123. 00:26:45,030 --> 00:26:47,230
  3124. Oh, you know. It's...
  3125.  
  3126. 693
  3127. 00:26:47,230 --> 00:26:49,430
  3128. It's okay-it's okay,
  3129. I guess. Yeah.
  3130.  
  3131. 694
  3132. 00:26:49,430 --> 00:26:52,330
  3133. I mean, my mom got her hair cut
  3134.  
  3135. 695
  3136. 00:26:52,340 --> 00:26:55,000
  3137. and colored exactly
  3138. like mine, but...
  3139.  
  3140. 696
  3141. 00:26:55,000 --> 00:26:56,840
  3142. I think that's pretty
  3143. normal, right?
  3144.  
  3145. 697
  3146. 00:26:56,840 --> 00:26:58,610
  3147. Your... Did your moms...
  3148.  
  3149. 698
  3150. 00:26:58,610 --> 00:27:02,280
  3151. Do your moms have
  3152. your... hairstyle?
  3153.  
  3154. 699
  3155. 00:27:02,280 --> 00:27:04,780
  3156. You know, every time
  3157.  
  3158. 700
  3159. 00:27:04,780 --> 00:27:07,380
  3160. I think I'm the fucked-up one
  3161. in this group
  3162.  
  3163. 701
  3164. 00:27:07,380 --> 00:27:11,890
  3165. Kiki, you open your mouth,
  3166. and then I'm like
  3167.  
  3168. 702
  3169. 00:27:11,890 --> 00:27:14,620
  3170. "No, I'm doing great."
  3171.  
  3172. 703
  3173. 00:27:14,630 --> 00:27:16,690
  3174. (LAUGHING)
  3175.  
  3176. 704
  3177. 00:27:16,690 --> 00:27:18,860
  3178. Anyway, uh, my mom and
  3179. I were gonna
  3180.  
  3181. 705
  3182. 00:27:18,860 --> 00:27:20,600
  3183. take the kids over
  3184. to Sky Zone later.
  3185.  
  3186. 706
  3187. 00:27:20,600 --> 00:27:22,200
  3188. - Do you guys wanna come?
  3189. - Legally...
  3190.  
  3191. 707
  3192. 00:27:22,200 --> 00:27:25,530
  3193. I can't get within
  3194. 50 yards of a Sky Zone but...
  3195.  
  3196. 708
  3197. 00:27:25,540 --> 00:27:27,570
  3198. Okay, you know what?
  3199. Fuck it. I'm totally in.
  3200.  
  3201. 709
  3202. 00:27:27,570 --> 00:27:29,740
  3203. - Amy?
  3204. - Oh, I can't-I can't go.
  3205.  
  3206. 710
  3207. 00:27:29,740 --> 00:27:31,470
  3208. I wish I could,
  3209. but my mother's making us
  3210.  
  3211. 711
  3212. 00:27:31,480 --> 00:27:33,080
  3213. go see "The Nutcracker." So...
  3214.  
  3215. 712
  3216. 00:27:33,080 --> 00:27:35,480
  3217. - I love "The Nutcracker."
  3218. - Oh, no, no, no, no!
  3219.  
  3220. 713
  3221. 00:27:35,480 --> 00:27:37,810
  3222. Not like the Sugar Plum Fairy
  3223. "Nutcracker."
  3224.  
  3225. 714
  3226. 00:27:37,810 --> 00:27:41,220
  3227. No, the original,
  3228. the five-hour long version
  3229.  
  3230. 715
  3231. 00:27:41,220 --> 00:27:43,620
  3232. that's all in Russian,
  3233. where a bunch of people die.
  3234.  
  3235. 716
  3236. 00:27:43,620 --> 00:27:45,220
  3237. It's-it's awful.
  3238.  
  3239. 717
  3240. 00:27:45,220 --> 00:27:47,050
  3241. - Why don't you just not go?
  3242. - Oh, God, no.
  3243.  
  3244. 718
  3245. 00:27:47,060 --> 00:27:48,960
  3246. No, she would never let me
  3247. live it down.
  3248.  
  3249. 719
  3250. 00:27:48,960 --> 00:27:50,730
  3251. It's much easier
  3252. to do it this way.
  3253.  
  3254. 720
  3255. 00:27:50,730 --> 00:27:54,100
  3256. Guys, are we not taking
  3257. Christmas back this year?
  3258.  
  3259. 721
  3260. 00:27:54,100 --> 00:27:55,760
  3261. - Yeah.
  3262. - Hmm.
  3263.  
  3264. 722
  3265. 00:27:55,770 --> 00:27:57,600
  3266. I'm asking you that seriously
  3267. 'cause I got so wasted
  3268.  
  3269. 723
  3270. 00:27:57,600 --> 00:27:59,500
  3271. at the mall, I can't remember
  3272. if I actually said that
  3273.  
  3274. 724
  3275. 00:27:59,500 --> 00:28:01,470
  3276. or if that's just something that
  3277. I'm dreaming about right now.
  3278.  
  3279. 725
  3280. 00:28:01,470 --> 00:28:03,410
  3281. (LAUGHS)
  3282.  
  3283. 726
  3284. 00:28:03,410 --> 00:28:05,270
  3285. Oh, shit. I'm so late for work.
  3286.  
  3287. 727
  3288. 00:28:05,270 --> 00:28:08,240
  3289. You guys, do you wanna know
  3290. what I've been working on?
  3291.  
  3292. 728
  3293. 00:28:08,240 --> 00:28:10,680
  3294. - Happy Holidays.
  3295. - Oh, my...
  3296.  
  3297. 729
  3298. 00:28:14,250 --> 00:28:17,120
  3299. - Carla!
  3300. - Broke my cock!
  3301.  
  3302. 730
  3303. 00:28:17,120 --> 00:28:19,790
  3304. - Just go to work.
  3305. - I'm out, I'm out, I'm out!
  3306.  
  3307. 731
  3308. 00:28:19,790 --> 00:28:22,190
  3309. (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
  3310.  
  3311. 732
  3312. 00:28:29,870 --> 00:28:34,640
  3313. - What up, lady?
  3314. - Mom! What are you doing here?
  3315.  
  3316. 733
  3317. 00:28:34,640 --> 00:28:36,370
  3318. What does it look like
  3319. I'm doing?
  3320.  
  3321. 734
  3322. 00:28:36,370 --> 00:28:40,140
  3323. I'm waiting for my daughter
  3324. to give me a free manicure.
  3325.  
  3326. 735
  3327. 00:28:40,140 --> 00:28:43,210
  3328. - Free manicure, huh?
  3329. - Yeah.
  3330.  
  3331. 736
  3332. 00:28:43,210 --> 00:28:46,210
  3333. Alright. Well, at least
  3334. I'm not waxing your pussy.
  3335.  
  3336. 737
  3337. 00:28:46,220 --> 00:28:48,620
  3338. - Maybe next time.
  3339. - Okay.
  3340.  
  3341. 738
  3342. 00:28:48,620 --> 00:28:52,490
  3343. So, what's up?
  3344. You seein' anybody?
  3345.  
  3346. 739
  3347. 00:28:52,490 --> 00:28:54,390
  3348. Well, you know,
  3349. there was a couple of things
  3350.  
  3351. 740
  3352. 00:28:54,390 --> 00:28:56,160
  3353. going with some dads
  3354. from school.
  3355.  
  3356. 741
  3357. 00:28:56,160 --> 00:28:58,860
  3358. But it gets complicated.
  3359.  
  3360. 742
  3361. 00:28:58,860 --> 00:29:01,800
  3362. Plus, like, there is not
  3363. a better time of the year
  3364.  
  3365. 743
  3366. 00:29:01,800 --> 00:29:03,370
  3367. to be single than Christmas.
  3368.  
  3369. 744
  3370. 00:29:03,370 --> 00:29:05,230
  3371. I mean, it's like,
  3372. I go to the mall
  3373.  
  3374. 745
  3375. 00:29:05,240 --> 00:29:08,400
  3376. and I see these, you know,
  3377. these couples walking around.
  3378.  
  3379. 746
  3380. 00:29:08,410 --> 00:29:12,340
  3381. And they're, they're, like,
  3382. holding hands and...
  3383.  
  3384. 747
  3385. 00:29:12,340 --> 00:29:14,910
  3386. You know,
  3387. wearing scarves
  3388.  
  3389. 748
  3390. 00:29:14,910 --> 00:29:17,550
  3391. and feeding
  3392. each other sandwiches
  3393.  
  3394. 749
  3395. 00:29:17,550 --> 00:29:22,150
  3396. and lookin' at jewelry,
  3397. you know...
  3398.  
  3399. 750
  3400. 00:29:22,150 --> 00:29:24,590
  3401. ♪ Every kiss
  3402. begins with Kay ♪
  3403.  
  3404. 751
  3405. 00:29:24,590 --> 00:29:26,660
  3406. - Alright, stop. Stop.
  3407. - What?
  3408.  
  3409. 752
  3410. 00:29:26,660 --> 00:29:29,830
  3411. - You sound super lonely.
  3412. - No!
  3413.  
  3414. 753
  3415. 00:29:29,830 --> 00:29:32,090
  3416. Babe, listen,
  3417. the rock and roll lifestyle
  3418.  
  3419. 754
  3420. 00:29:32,100 --> 00:29:33,490
  3421. isn't for everybody.
  3422.  
  3423. 755
  3424. 00:29:33,500 --> 00:29:35,500
  3425. I'm still super rock and roll.
  3426.  
  3427. 756
  3428. 00:29:35,500 --> 00:29:37,700
  3429. I woke up in a park
  3430. this morning.
  3431.  
  3432. 757
  3433. 00:29:37,700 --> 00:29:42,070
  3434. Carla. I found kale chips
  3435. in your kitchen.
  3436.  
  3437. 758
  3438. 00:29:42,070 --> 00:29:44,910
  3439. - Okay, those are for my kid.
  3440. - Right.
  3441.  
  3442. 759
  3443. 00:29:44,910 --> 00:29:46,280
  3444. They're healthy as fuck.
  3445.  
  3446. 760
  3447. 00:29:47,510 --> 00:29:49,910
  3448. Th... They say
  3449. they're heart-smart.
  3450.  
  3451. 761
  3452. 00:29:49,910 --> 00:29:52,250
  3453. You really care about
  3454. your kid, don't you?
  3455.  
  3456. 762
  3457. 00:29:52,250 --> 00:29:54,520
  3458. Yeah, he's my...
  3459.  
  3460. 763
  3461. 00:29:54,520 --> 00:29:56,520
  3462. I mean, most... people
  3463.  
  3464. 764
  3465. 00:29:56,520 --> 00:29:58,120
  3466. care about their children, mom.
  3467.  
  3468. 765
  3469. 00:29:58,120 --> 00:30:00,250
  3470. Whatever, I just can't keep up
  3471.  
  3472. 766
  3473. 00:30:00,260 --> 00:30:02,430
  3474. with the latest
  3475. parenting trends.
  3476.  
  3477. 767
  3478. 00:30:06,300 --> 00:30:09,900
  3479. So, how you doin'?
  3480.  
  3481. 768
  3482. 00:30:09,900 --> 00:30:12,470
  3483. I've been better actually,
  3484. to tell you the truth. I...
  3485.  
  3486. 769
  3487. 00:30:12,470 --> 00:30:15,270
  3488. There is something
  3489. that I'm very excited about
  3490.  
  3491. 770
  3492. 00:30:15,270 --> 00:30:16,970
  3493. which I just need
  3494. a little money for...
  3495.  
  3496. 771
  3497. 00:30:16,970 --> 00:30:18,740
  3498. Here we go.
  3499.  
  3500. 772
  3501. 00:30:18,740 --> 00:30:20,940
  3502. - What?
  3503. - You always do this.
  3504.  
  3505. 773
  3506. 00:30:20,940 --> 00:30:22,740
  3507. What?
  3508.  
  3509. 774
  3510. 00:30:22,750 --> 00:30:24,380
  3511. You show back up in my life.
  3512.  
  3513. 775
  3514. 00:30:24,380 --> 00:30:26,280
  3515. You ask me for money,
  3516. I give it to you.
  3517.  
  3518. 776
  3519. 00:30:26,280 --> 00:30:29,220
  3520. You gamble it all away
  3521. and you leave me and then
  3522.  
  3523. 777
  3524. 00:30:29,220 --> 00:30:31,420
  3525. you just come runnin' back
  3526. asking for more.
  3527.  
  3528. 778
  3529. 00:30:31,420 --> 00:30:33,550
  3530. I give it to you again
  3531. 'cause I'm an idiot.
  3532.  
  3533. 779
  3534. 00:30:33,560 --> 00:30:35,260
  3535. This is a legitimate
  3536.  
  3537. 780
  3538. 00:30:35,260 --> 00:30:37,990
  3539. business opportunity.
  3540.  
  3541. 781
  3542. 00:30:37,990 --> 00:30:39,430
  3543. How much do you need?
  3544.  
  3545. 782
  3546. 00:30:39,430 --> 00:30:41,600
  3547. Not much. Like five grand.
  3548.  
  3549. 783
  3550. 00:30:41,600 --> 00:30:44,500
  3551. Really. Fiv... Between five
  3552. and ten grand, maybe 15, tops.
  3553.  
  3554. 784
  3555. 00:30:44,500 --> 00:30:46,570
  3556. (SIGHS)
  3557.  
  3558. 785
  3559. 00:30:46,570 --> 00:30:48,300
  3560. Okay, I'll think about it.
  3561.  
  3562. 786
  3563. 00:30:48,300 --> 00:30:49,570
  3564. Good!
  3565.  
  3566. 787
  3567. 00:30:51,770 --> 00:30:55,440
  3568. Wow, you have some
  3569. really cool shit here, huh?
  3570.  
  3571. 788
  3572. 00:30:55,450 --> 00:30:58,580
  3573. Nice, classy place.
  3574.  
  3575. 789
  3576. 00:30:58,580 --> 00:31:00,490
  3577. I wish I'd brought my purse.
  3578.  
  3579. 790
  3580. 00:31:03,350 --> 00:31:06,290
  3581. (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
  3582.  
  3583. 791
  3584. 00:31:10,330 --> 00:31:12,830
  3585. Why do we have to go to
  3586. the "Russian Nutcracker" again?
  3587.  
  3588. 792
  3589. 00:31:12,830 --> 00:31:13,990
  3590. I mean, we're not even Russian.
  3591.  
  3592. 793
  3593. 00:31:14,000 --> 00:31:15,260
  3594. The "Russian Nutcracker"
  3595.  
  3596. 794
  3597. 00:31:15,260 --> 00:31:17,500
  3598. is the real "Nutcracker."
  3599.  
  3600. 795
  3601. 00:31:17,500 --> 00:31:21,000
  3602. Not the sellout Disney version
  3603. with all the dancing and joy.
  3604.  
  3605. 796
  3606. 00:31:22,270 --> 00:31:24,670
  3607. Is it actually five hours long?
  3608.  
  3609. 797
  3610. 00:31:24,680 --> 00:31:27,180
  3611. Yes, and you will love
  3612. every minute of it.
  3613.  
  3614. 798
  3615. 00:31:27,180 --> 00:31:29,340
  3616. Now, just listen
  3617. to this beautiful music.
  3618.  
  3619. 799
  3620. 00:31:29,350 --> 00:31:31,520
  3621. (OPERA MUSIC ON RADIO)
  3622.  
  3623. 800
  3624. 00:31:33,180 --> 00:31:36,480
  3625. This song is called
  3626. "When Boris Gets Murdered."
  3627.  
  3628. 801
  3629. 00:31:36,490 --> 00:31:38,820
  3630. It sounds like
  3631. someone's yelling at us.
  3632.  
  3633. 802
  3634. 00:31:38,820 --> 00:31:40,720
  3635. Why can't we just
  3636. go do something fun?
  3637.  
  3638. 803
  3639. 00:31:40,720 --> 00:31:41,960
  3640. (RUTH HUMMING)
  3641.  
  3642. 804
  3643. 00:31:44,730 --> 00:31:47,130
  3644. (TIRES SCREECHING)
  3645.  
  3646. 805
  3647. 00:31:47,130 --> 00:31:48,530
  3648. Where are you going?
  3649. It's not left.
  3650.  
  3651. 806
  3652. 00:31:48,530 --> 00:31:50,030
  3653. - The theater's to the right.
  3654. - Oh, I know.
  3655.  
  3656. 807
  3657. 00:31:50,030 --> 00:31:51,400
  3658. We're not goin' to the theater.
  3659.  
  3660. 808
  3661. 00:31:51,400 --> 00:31:52,530
  3662. Where are you taking us?
  3663.  
  3664. 809
  3665. 00:31:52,540 --> 00:31:53,800
  3666. You'll see.
  3667.  
  3668. 810
  3669. 00:31:57,040 --> 00:31:59,910
  3670. (INDISTINCT CHATTERING)
  3671.  
  3672. 811
  3673. 00:32:02,680 --> 00:32:05,550
  3674. (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
  3675.  
  3676. 812
  3677. 00:32:14,860 --> 00:32:16,190
  3678. Merry Christmas, guys!
  3679. Welcome to Sky Zone!
  3680.  
  3681. 813
  3682. 00:32:16,190 --> 00:32:17,390
  3683. - Merry Christmas!
  3684. - Merry Christmas!
  3685.  
  3686. 814
  3687. 00:32:17,390 --> 00:32:19,160
  3688. - Alright, uh, three kid passes?
  3689. - Yes.
  3690.  
  3691. 815
  3692. 00:32:19,160 --> 00:32:21,730
  3693. No, no. Uh, sorry. We're-we're
  3694. actually all gonna go.
  3695.  
  3696. 816
  3697. 00:32:21,730 --> 00:32:23,930
  3698. - We're all gonna do it.
  3699. - No, we're not all doing it.
  3700.  
  3701. 817
  3702. 00:32:23,930 --> 00:32:25,900
  3703. It smells like diapers in here.
  3704.  
  3705. 818
  3706. 00:32:25,900 --> 00:32:28,840
  3707. - Amy! You guys made it!
  3708. - Hey!
  3709.  
  3710. 819
  3711. 00:32:28,840 --> 00:32:31,270
  3712. - I'm so glad you guys came!
  3713. - Oh, my God. Me, too.
  3714.  
  3715. 820
  3716. 00:32:31,270 --> 00:32:33,040
  3717. I think my mother's gonna kill
  3718. me in the middle of the night.
  3719.  
  3720. 821
  3721. 00:32:33,040 --> 00:32:36,010
  3722. - But it's totally worth it.
  3723. - Hi, I'm Carla's mom.
  3724.  
  3725. 822
  3726. 00:32:36,010 --> 00:32:37,410
  3727. - Hi. Isis!
  3728. - Yeah.
  3729.  
  3730. 823
  3731. 00:32:37,410 --> 00:32:39,050
  3732. - Oh, yeah! Yeah!
  3733. - Nice to meet you.
  3734.  
  3735. 824
  3736. 00:32:39,050 --> 00:32:43,220
  3737. Hi. You must be Amy's mom.
  3738. I'm Carla.
  3739.  
  3740. 825
  3741. 00:32:43,220 --> 00:32:45,120
  3742. Jaxon, honey,
  3743. mama needs more hooch.
  3744.  
  3745. 826
  3746. 00:32:45,120 --> 00:32:46,890
  3747. - Ooh, good idea.
  3748. - Yeah.
  3749.  
  3750. 827
  3751. 00:32:46,890 --> 00:32:49,060
  3752. - Top me off, babe.
  3753. - That's my son, Jaxon.
  3754.  
  3755. 828
  3756. 00:32:49,060 --> 00:32:51,960
  3757. - This is my mom, Isis.
  3758. - Hello. Ruth.
  3759.  
  3760. 829
  3761. 00:32:51,960 --> 00:32:55,700
  3762. - Like Ruth Bader Ginsberg.
  3763. - Huh. Isis.
  3764.  
  3765. 830
  3766. 00:32:55,700 --> 00:32:58,730
  3767. Like the terrorist organization.
  3768.  
  3769. 831
  3770. 00:32:58,740 --> 00:33:02,570
  3771. - This is my mom, Sandy.
  3772. - Oh, hi, Amy.
  3773.  
  3774. 832
  3775. 00:33:02,570 --> 00:33:05,310
  3776. I've heard so much about you.
  3777.  
  3778. 833
  3779. 00:33:05,310 --> 00:33:09,280
  3780. Oh, boy! You really have
  3781. the same haircuts.
  3782.  
  3783. 834
  3784. 00:33:09,280 --> 00:33:12,580
  3785. Hello, I'm Ruth.
  3786. I'm Amy's mom.
  3787.  
  3788. 835
  3789. 00:33:12,580 --> 00:33:15,390
  3790. I'm Jessie. I was literally
  3791. just in the car with you.
  3792.  
  3793. 836
  3794. 00:33:17,320 --> 00:33:20,550
  3795. Come on. Who's ready
  3796. to have some Christmas fun?
  3797.  
  3798. 837
  3799. 00:33:20,560 --> 00:33:22,790
  3800. ♪ I ain't scared
  3801. I ain't scared ♪
  3802.  
  3803. 838
  3804. 00:33:22,790 --> 00:33:25,160
  3805. ♪ I can't stop
  3806. so let's go oh oh ♪
  3807.  
  3808. 839
  3809. 00:33:25,160 --> 00:33:27,260
  3810. ♪ I like it
  3811. when you do it like that ♪
  3812.  
  3813. 840
  3814. 00:33:27,260 --> 00:33:29,000
  3815. ♪ You like it
  3816. when I do it like that ♪
  3817.  
  3818. 841
  3819. 00:33:29,000 --> 00:33:31,570
  3820. ♪ And I know when
  3821. we're moving like that ♪
  3822.  
  3823. 842
  3824. 00:33:31,570 --> 00:33:34,140
  3825. ♪ Ain't nobody else
  3826. do it like that ♪
  3827.  
  3828. 843
  3829. 00:33:34,140 --> 00:33:36,300
  3830. - ♪ Whoo ooh ooh ♪
  3831. - ♪ Watch me now ♪
  3832.  
  3833. 844
  3834. 00:33:36,310 --> 00:33:38,010
  3835. - ♪ Whoo ooh ooh ♪
  3836. - ♪ Don't stop me now ♪
  3837.  
  3838. 845
  3839. 00:33:38,010 --> 00:33:40,240
  3840. ♪ I'm gon' do it how we do it ♪
  3841.  
  3842. 846
  3843. 00:33:40,240 --> 00:33:43,350
  3844. ♪ Like I do it I'm gon' do it
  3845. like a star ♪
  3846.  
  3847. 847
  3848. 00:33:43,350 --> 00:33:45,150
  3849. ♪ Yeah I like it
  3850. when you do it like that ♪
  3851.  
  3852. 848
  3853. 00:33:45,150 --> 00:33:47,650
  3854. ♪ Know exactly what you thinking
  3855. when I do it like that ♪
  3856.  
  3857. 849
  3858. 00:33:47,650 --> 00:33:49,620
  3859. ♪ Pull it right back
  3860. turn the beat so fast ♪
  3861.  
  3862. 850
  3863. 00:33:49,620 --> 00:33:52,020
  3864. ♪ Keep the bass real low
  3865. I keep it just like that yeah ♪
  3866.  
  3867. 851
  3868. 00:33:52,020 --> 00:33:54,320
  3869. - ♪ Whoo ooh ooh ♪
  3870. - ♪ Watch me now ♪
  3871.  
  3872. 852
  3873. 00:33:54,320 --> 00:33:56,160
  3874. - ♪ Whoo ooh ooh ♪
  3875. - ♪ Don't stop me now ♪
  3876.  
  3877. 853
  3878. 00:33:56,160 --> 00:33:58,160
  3879. ♪ I'm gon' do it how we do it ♪
  3880.  
  3881. 854
  3882. 00:33:58,160 --> 00:34:00,430
  3883. ♪ Like I do it
  3884. I'm gon' do it ♪
  3885.  
  3886. 855
  3887. 00:34:00,430 --> 00:34:02,600
  3888. ♪ Like that ♪
  3889.  
  3890. 856
  3891. 00:34:06,670 --> 00:34:10,110
  3892. ♪ Hey hey yeah yeah yeah ♪
  3893.  
  3894. 857
  3895. 00:34:10,110 --> 00:34:11,940
  3896. ♪ Yeah I do it do it
  3897. you never do it ♪
  3898.  
  3899. 858
  3900. 00:34:11,940 --> 00:34:14,540
  3901. ♪ I pick it up and throw it
  3902. right back when I get into it ♪
  3903.  
  3904. 859
  3905. 00:34:14,540 --> 00:34:16,710
  3906. ♪ 'Cause there's no holding back
  3907. when I break through it ♪
  3908.  
  3909. 860
  3910. 00:34:16,710 --> 00:34:18,950
  3911. ♪ Better hurry up and get it
  3912. when I do you won't forget it ♪
  3913.  
  3914. 861
  3915. 00:34:18,950 --> 00:34:20,780
  3916. ♪ I like it
  3917. when you do it like that ♪
  3918.  
  3919. 862
  3920. 00:34:20,780 --> 00:34:22,950
  3921. ♪ You like it
  3922. when I do it like that ♪
  3923.  
  3924. 863
  3925. 00:34:22,950 --> 00:34:25,450
  3926. ♪ Ain't nobody else
  3927. do it like that ♪
  3928.  
  3929. 864
  3930. 00:34:25,460 --> 00:34:27,820
  3931. ♪ I like it
  3932. when you do it like that ♪
  3933.  
  3934. 865
  3935. 00:34:27,820 --> 00:34:29,720
  3936. ♪ You like it
  3937. when I do it like that ♪
  3938.  
  3939. 866
  3940. 00:34:29,730 --> 00:34:31,890
  3941. ♪ And I know
  3942. when we do it like that ♪
  3943.  
  3944. 867
  3945. 00:34:31,900 --> 00:34:33,330
  3946. ♪ Ain't nobody else
  3947. do it like that ♪♪
  3948.  
  3949. 868
  3950. 00:34:33,330 --> 00:34:35,860
  3951. Hi, Ruth.
  3952. We bought you a churro.
  3953.  
  3954. 869
  3955. 00:34:35,870 --> 00:34:37,800
  3956. - You want that?
  3957. - No, thank you.
  3958.  
  3959. 870
  3960. 00:34:37,800 --> 00:34:39,230
  3961. This place is fun.
  3962.  
  3963. 871
  3964. 00:34:39,240 --> 00:34:41,200
  3965. I never went to a place like
  3966. this when I was a kid.
  3967.  
  3968. 872
  3969. 00:34:41,200 --> 00:34:42,670
  3970. My God, no.
  3971.  
  3972. 873
  3973. 00:34:42,670 --> 00:34:44,170
  3974. When I was a kid,
  3975. we would go down
  3976.  
  3977. 874
  3978. 00:34:44,170 --> 00:34:46,340
  3979. to the quarry
  3980. and blow shit up.
  3981.  
  3982. 875
  3983. 00:34:46,340 --> 00:34:48,810
  3984. That's nice.
  3985. Where are you ladies from?
  3986.  
  3987. 876
  3988. 00:34:48,810 --> 00:34:51,050
  3989. I am from Ottawa,
  3990. which is in Canada.
  3991.  
  3992. 877
  3993. 00:34:51,050 --> 00:34:53,250
  3994. And then my husband Dirk
  3995. wanted a faster life
  3996.  
  3997. 878
  3998. 00:34:53,250 --> 00:34:55,820
  3999. so we moved to Bismarck,
  4000. North Dakota.
  4001.  
  4002. 879
  4003. 00:34:55,820 --> 00:34:59,320
  4004. And then I had Kiki
  4005. when I was only 18 years old.
  4006.  
  4007. 880
  4008. 00:34:59,320 --> 00:35:02,690
  4009. And then Dirk died.
  4010. A long, slow, painful death.
  4011.  
  4012. 881
  4013. 00:35:02,690 --> 00:35:06,190
  4014. But we're all gonna die
  4015. sometime, alone and afraid.
  4016.  
  4017. 882
  4018. 00:35:06,200 --> 00:35:08,060
  4019. - Where are you from, Ruth?
  4020. - Chicago.
  4021.  
  4022. 883
  4023. 00:35:08,060 --> 00:35:09,900
  4024. (GASPS)
  4025. The City of Lights!
  4026.  
  4027. 884
  4028. 00:35:09,900 --> 00:35:11,200
  4029. The Windy City.
  4030.  
  4031. 885
  4032. 00:35:11,200 --> 00:35:12,270
  4033. You know what they call
  4034. Bismarck?
  4035.  
  4036. 886
  4037. 00:35:12,270 --> 00:35:13,830
  4038. "The City of Old White People."
  4039.  
  4040. 887
  4041. 00:35:13,840 --> 00:35:15,700
  4042. You are so weird.
  4043.  
  4044. 888
  4045. 00:35:15,700 --> 00:35:18,070
  4046. Ruth, did you enjoy
  4047. growing up in Chicago?
  4048.  
  4049. 889
  4050. 00:35:18,080 --> 00:35:20,510
  4051. No. My mother
  4052. was a terrible woman.
  4053.  
  4054. 890
  4055. 00:35:20,510 --> 00:35:22,410
  4056. - Oh.
  4057. - She once slapped me.
  4058.  
  4059. 891
  4060. 00:35:22,410 --> 00:35:24,950
  4061. For wearing open-toed shoes
  4062. on a sailboat.
  4063.  
  4064. 892
  4065. 00:35:24,950 --> 00:35:26,550
  4066. Well, it was
  4067. a different time then.
  4068.  
  4069. 893
  4070. 00:35:26,550 --> 00:35:27,550
  4071. This was two months ago.
  4072.  
  4073. 894
  4074. 00:35:29,220 --> 00:35:31,390
  4075. My daughter thinks
  4076. that I'm so hard on her.
  4077.  
  4078. 895
  4079. 00:35:31,390 --> 00:35:33,020
  4080. But she has no idea
  4081. what I went through
  4082.  
  4083. 896
  4084. 00:35:33,020 --> 00:35:34,520
  4085. with my own mother.
  4086.  
  4087. 897
  4088. 00:35:34,520 --> 00:35:36,890
  4089. When I was 15,
  4090. I got my ears pierced
  4091.  
  4092. 898
  4093. 00:35:36,890 --> 00:35:38,930
  4094. and she called me a whore.
  4095.  
  4096. 899
  4097. 00:35:38,930 --> 00:35:41,100
  4098. And sent me away
  4099. to boarding school.
  4100.  
  4101. 900
  4102. 00:35:41,100 --> 00:35:42,960
  4103. - In Croatia.
  4104. - Croatia?
  4105.  
  4106. 901
  4107. 00:35:42,970 --> 00:35:44,630
  4108. - Now, that is a hard woman.
  4109. - Uh.
  4110.  
  4111. 902
  4112. 00:35:44,630 --> 00:35:46,570
  4113. - Where are you from, Isis?
  4114. - I don't know, everywhere.
  4115.  
  4116. 903
  4117. 00:35:46,570 --> 00:35:48,040
  4118. I never met my parents.
  4119.  
  4120. 904
  4121. 00:35:48,040 --> 00:35:49,870
  4122. I basically just raised myself
  4123.  
  4124. 905
  4125. 00:35:49,870 --> 00:35:51,470
  4126. using my wits and my tits.
  4127.  
  4128. 906
  4129. 00:35:51,470 --> 00:35:53,940
  4130. Oh, wow.
  4131. That sounds disgusting.
  4132.  
  4133. 907
  4134. 00:35:53,940 --> 00:35:56,740
  4135. No, dude, I was a roadie
  4136. for REO Speedwagon
  4137.  
  4138. 908
  4139. 00:35:56,750 --> 00:35:59,080
  4140. for 15 years.
  4141.  
  4142. 909
  4143. 00:35:59,080 --> 00:36:02,550
  4144. Oh, um, Isis, you're not allowed
  4145. to smoke cigarettes in here.
  4146.  
  4147. 910
  4148. 00:36:02,550 --> 00:36:03,890
  4149. It's okay.
  4150. It's not a cigarette.
  4151.  
  4152. 911
  4153. 00:36:03,890 --> 00:36:05,320
  4154. - You want some?
  4155. - No! Ahem!
  4156.  
  4157. 912
  4158. 00:36:05,320 --> 00:36:07,920
  4159. - You want some?
  4160. - Uh, no, thank you.
  4161.  
  4162. 913
  4163. 00:36:07,920 --> 00:36:09,790
  4164. - Suit yourself.
  4165. - So...
  4166.  
  4167. 914
  4168. 00:36:09,790 --> 00:36:12,260
  4169. Which church does everyone
  4170. go to on Christmas Eve?
  4171.  
  4172. 915
  4173. 00:36:12,260 --> 00:36:14,290
  4174. Well, I always go
  4175. to midnight mass
  4176.  
  4177. 916
  4178. 00:36:14,300 --> 00:36:16,100
  4179. at Our Mother
  4180. of Perpetual Suffering.
  4181.  
  4182. 917
  4183. 00:36:16,100 --> 00:36:18,270
  4184. It's the premiere service
  4185. in the city.
  4186.  
  4187. 918
  4188. 00:36:18,270 --> 00:36:20,140
  4189. - Great, I'll meet you there.
  4190. - What?
  4191.  
  4192. 919
  4193. 00:36:20,140 --> 00:36:23,000
  4194. This is so nice.
  4195. Making new friends.
  4196.  
  4197. 920
  4198. 00:36:23,010 --> 00:36:25,070
  4199. - Yeah.
  4200. - You guys wanna play dodgeball?
  4201.  
  4202. 921
  4203. 00:36:25,080 --> 00:36:26,840
  4204. No, honey.
  4205. Grandmas don't play dodgeball.
  4206.  
  4207. 922
  4208. 00:36:26,840 --> 00:36:28,580
  4209. - We should...
  4210. - What the fuck did she say?
  4211.  
  4212. 923
  4213. 00:36:28,580 --> 00:36:30,850
  4214. She said, "Grandmas
  4215. don't play dodgeball."
  4216.  
  4217. 924
  4218. 00:36:30,850 --> 00:36:33,080
  4219. I got it, but we play.
  4220. We play.
  4221.  
  4222. 925
  4223. 00:36:33,080 --> 00:36:35,150
  4224. I'm in.
  4225.  
  4226. 926
  4227. 00:36:35,150 --> 00:36:38,090
  4228. (MOTLEY CRUE SING
  4229. "KICKSTART MY HEART")
  4230.  
  4231. 927
  4232. 00:36:51,800 --> 00:36:54,670
  4233. ♪ When I get high
  4234. I get high on speed ♪
  4235.  
  4236. 928
  4237. 00:36:54,670 --> 00:36:56,840
  4238. ♪ Top fuel funny car's
  4239. a drug for me ♪
  4240.  
  4241. 929
  4242. 00:36:56,840 --> 00:36:58,940
  4243. ♪ My heart my heart ♪
  4244.  
  4245. 930
  4246. 00:36:58,940 --> 00:37:01,310
  4247. ♪ Kickstart my heart ♪
  4248.  
  4249. 931
  4250. 00:37:07,980 --> 00:37:10,620
  4251. ♪ Whoa yeah ♪
  4252.  
  4253. 932
  4254. 00:37:10,620 --> 00:37:13,320
  4255. ♪ Kickstart my heart
  4256. give it a start ♪
  4257.  
  4258. 933
  4259. 00:37:13,320 --> 00:37:15,860
  4260. ♪ Whoa yeah ♪
  4261.  
  4262. 934
  4263. 00:37:15,860 --> 00:37:18,630
  4264. ♪ Baby ♪
  4265.  
  4266. 935
  4267. 00:37:18,630 --> 00:37:21,360
  4268. ♪ Whoa yeah ♪
  4269.  
  4270. 936
  4271. 00:37:21,360 --> 00:37:24,060
  4272. ♪ Kickstart my heart
  4273. hope it never stops ♪
  4274.  
  4275. 937
  4276. 00:37:24,070 --> 00:37:26,700
  4277. ♪ Oh yeah ♪
  4278.  
  4279. 938
  4280. 00:37:26,700 --> 00:37:29,840
  4281. ♪ Baby ♪
  4282.  
  4283. 939
  4284. 00:37:35,880 --> 00:37:38,820
  4285. (INTENSE MUSIC)
  4286.  
  4287. 940
  4288. 00:38:05,410 --> 00:38:08,340
  4289. (MUSIC CONTINUES)
  4290.  
  4291. 941
  4292. 00:38:20,760 --> 00:38:23,690
  4293. (BELL TOLLS)
  4294.  
  4295. 942
  4296. 00:38:26,760 --> 00:38:29,100
  4297. Tonight was a complete travesty.
  4298.  
  4299. 943
  4300. 00:38:29,100 --> 00:38:30,870
  4301. (CHUCKLES)
  4302.  
  4303. 944
  4304. 00:38:30,870 --> 00:38:32,230
  4305. (IMITATES RUTH)
  4306.  
  4307. 945
  4308. 00:38:32,240 --> 00:38:34,400
  4309. Do you think
  4310. that was funny, Hank?
  4311.  
  4312. 946
  4313. 00:38:34,400 --> 00:38:36,070
  4314. What if I changed out
  4315. your heart pills?
  4316.  
  4317. 947
  4318. 00:38:36,070 --> 00:38:38,740
  4319. - Would that be funny, too?
  4320. - Oh, Jesus, babe.
  4321.  
  4322. 948
  4323. 00:38:38,740 --> 00:38:41,480
  4324. I can't believe
  4325. A-Amy is actually intent
  4326.  
  4327. 949
  4328. 00:38:41,480 --> 00:38:42,940
  4329. on ruining Christmas this year.
  4330.  
  4331. 950
  4332. 00:38:42,950 --> 00:38:44,480
  4333. I'm gonna have
  4334. to redouble my efforts.
  4335.  
  4336. 951
  4337. 00:38:44,480 --> 00:38:45,910
  4338. Or you could stop
  4339. fighting with her
  4340.  
  4341. 952
  4342. 00:38:45,910 --> 00:38:47,650
  4343. and we could just have
  4344. a nice Christmas.
  4345.  
  4346. 953
  4347. 00:38:47,650 --> 00:38:50,220
  4348. Do you think I enjoy fighting
  4349. with my daughter, Hank?
  4350.  
  4351. 954
  4352. 00:38:50,220 --> 00:38:53,620
  4353. - Yeah! Oh.
  4354. - Because I don't.
  4355.  
  4356. 955
  4357. 00:38:53,620 --> 00:38:55,560
  4358. I'm just trying to give
  4359. my grandchildren
  4360.  
  4361. 956
  4362. 00:38:55,560 --> 00:38:58,890
  4363. the amazing Christmas
  4364. that they deserve.
  4365.  
  4366. 957
  4367. 00:38:58,890 --> 00:39:01,230
  4368. This is their first Christmas
  4369. without their father.
  4370.  
  4371. 958
  4372. 00:39:01,230 --> 00:39:02,730
  4373. And if it is perfect
  4374.  
  4375. 959
  4376. 00:39:02,730 --> 00:39:05,630
  4377. they will know
  4378. that things are gonna be okay.
  4379.  
  4380. 960
  4381. 00:39:05,640 --> 00:39:08,600
  4382. But if our daughter throws
  4383. a half-assed Christmas
  4384.  
  4385. 961
  4386. 00:39:08,600 --> 00:39:10,910
  4387. it will rattle the kids,
  4388. and they could descend
  4389.  
  4390. 962
  4391. 00:39:10,910 --> 00:39:14,110
  4392. into a spiral of fear,
  4393. depression and drugs.
  4394.  
  4395. 963
  4396. 00:39:14,110 --> 00:39:18,510
  4397. Okay. But the kids looked
  4398. really happy tonight.
  4399.  
  4400. 964
  4401. 00:39:18,520 --> 00:39:19,810
  4402. They would have been happier
  4403.  
  4404. 965
  4405. 00:39:19,820 --> 00:39:21,580
  4406. at the "Russian Nutcracker,"
  4407. Hank.
  4408.  
  4409. 966
  4410. 00:39:21,580 --> 00:39:25,350
  4411. My way of doing Christmas
  4412. is enchanting and magical.
  4413.  
  4414. 967
  4415. 00:39:25,350 --> 00:39:29,090
  4416. And Amy's way of doing Christmas
  4417. is lazy and embarrassing.
  4418.  
  4419. 968
  4420. 00:39:29,090 --> 00:39:30,930
  4421. And my way is better,
  4422. and my way will win.
  4423.  
  4424. 969
  4425. 00:39:30,930 --> 00:39:32,590
  4426. Because my way will always win.
  4427.  
  4428. 970
  4429. 00:39:32,600 --> 00:39:34,960
  4430. Well, I'm just glad
  4431. this is all about the kids.
  4432.  
  4433. 971
  4434. 00:39:34,960 --> 00:39:37,130
  4435. Hank, I am Amy's mother
  4436.  
  4437. 972
  4438. 00:39:37,130 --> 00:39:38,830
  4439. and it is my job
  4440.  
  4441. 973
  4442. 00:39:38,830 --> 00:39:42,370
  4443. to push her to be the best
  4444. mother she possibly can be.
  4445.  
  4446. 974
  4447. 00:39:42,370 --> 00:39:44,270
  4448. Trust me, someday
  4449. she will thank me
  4450.  
  4451. 975
  4452. 00:39:44,270 --> 00:39:47,270
  4453. in an inspirational speech
  4454. at some large public venue.
  4455.  
  4456. 976
  4457. 00:39:47,280 --> 00:39:48,810
  4458. (INHALES)
  4459.  
  4460. 977
  4461. 00:39:48,810 --> 00:39:50,680
  4462. Now, are you done
  4463. ironing my pajamas, Hank?
  4464.  
  4465. 978
  4466. 00:39:50,680 --> 00:39:52,880
  4467. Yes, Ruth.
  4468.  
  4469. 979
  4470. 00:39:52,880 --> 00:39:54,890
  4471. They're still warm.
  4472.  
  4473. 980
  4474. 00:39:56,050 --> 00:39:58,020
  4475. I'm sorry you're upset.
  4476.  
  4477. 981
  4478. 00:39:59,490 --> 00:40:01,820
  4479. Thank you.
  4480.  
  4481. 982
  4482. 00:40:01,830 --> 00:40:03,730
  4483. It's okay.
  4484.  
  4485. 983
  4486. 00:40:05,130 --> 00:40:06,660
  4487. (SNIFFLES)
  4488.  
  4489. 984
  4490. 00:40:08,500 --> 00:40:10,370
  4491. You're wrinkling my pajamas.
  4492.  
  4493. 985
  4494. 00:40:11,900 --> 00:40:13,330
  4495. I'll get your toothbrush ready.
  4496.  
  4497. 986
  4498. 00:40:13,340 --> 00:40:14,500
  4499. Thank you.
  4500.  
  4501. 987
  4502. 00:40:16,640 --> 00:40:18,180
  4503. (BELLS CHIMING)
  4504.  
  4505. 988
  4506. 00:40:20,080 --> 00:40:22,640
  4507. Oh, my God. No more pussies.
  4508. Please, God. No more pussies.
  4509.  
  4510. 989
  4511. 00:40:22,640 --> 00:40:25,250
  4512. (KNOCK ON THE DOOR)
  4513. Uh, yeah?
  4514.  
  4515. 990
  4516. 00:40:25,250 --> 00:40:27,010
  4517. Oh, hi. Uh...
  4518.  
  4519. 991
  4520. 00:40:27,020 --> 00:40:29,080
  4521. Are you Carla?
  4522.  
  4523. 992
  4524. 00:40:29,080 --> 00:40:31,520
  4525. (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
  4526.  
  4527. 993
  4528. 00:40:31,520 --> 00:40:33,520
  4529. Yeah, I am.
  4530.  
  4531. 994
  4532. 00:40:33,520 --> 00:40:36,260
  4533. - Who are you?
  4534. - I'm Ty Swindel.
  4535.  
  4536. 995
  4537. 00:40:36,260 --> 00:40:37,760
  4538. I'm here to get my balls waxed.
  4539.  
  4540. 996
  4541. 00:40:37,760 --> 00:40:39,260
  4542. CARLA:
  4543. That's great news.
  4544.  
  4545. 997
  4546. 00:40:39,260 --> 00:40:42,260
  4547. Why don't you hop
  4548. on my table, Ty Swindel?
  4549.  
  4550. 998
  4551. 00:40:42,270 --> 00:40:43,270
  4552. Alright, thank you.
  4553.  
  4554. 999
  4555. 00:40:44,600 --> 00:40:46,170
  4556. Okay.
  4557.  
  4558. 1000
  4559. 00:40:46,170 --> 00:40:49,340
  4560. So, uh, have you ever had
  4561. your balls waxed before, Ty?
  4562.  
  4563. 1001
  4564. 00:40:49,340 --> 00:40:51,440
  4565. Oh, yeah, yeah,
  4566. I'm, uh, I'm an exotic dancer.
  4567.  
  4568. 1002
  4569. 00:40:51,440 --> 00:40:54,510
  4570. So I have to keep my dick, balls
  4571. and taint smooth at all times.
  4572.  
  4573. 1003
  4574. 00:40:54,510 --> 00:40:55,880
  4575. - Great. Okay, got it.
  4576. - Yeah.
  4577.  
  4578. 1004
  4579. 00:40:55,880 --> 00:40:58,680
  4580. Um, so I am just gonna
  4581. remove the towel
  4582.  
  4583. 1005
  4584. 00:40:58,680 --> 00:41:01,080
  4585. and then we'll apply
  4586. the wax if you...
  4587.  
  4588. 1006
  4589. 00:41:01,080 --> 00:41:03,450
  4590. Oh, Jesus fucking Christ.
  4591.  
  4592. 1007
  4593. 00:41:03,450 --> 00:41:05,120
  4594. Look at the size of that thing.
  4595.  
  4596. 1008
  4597. 00:41:05,120 --> 00:41:07,020
  4598. This... It looks like
  4599. a parking cone.
  4600.  
  4601. 1009
  4602. 00:41:07,020 --> 00:41:09,120
  4603. I am so sorry.
  4604. I forgot to te...
  4605.  
  4606. 1010
  4607. 00:41:09,120 --> 00:41:10,620
  4608. You know,
  4609. it scares most people.
  4610.  
  4611. 1011
  4612. 00:41:10,630 --> 00:41:12,060
  4613. No, I'm not scared, though.
  4614. I just...
  4615.  
  4616. 1012
  4617. 00:41:12,060 --> 00:41:13,460
  4618. I'm gonna need a lot more...
  4619.  
  4620. 1013
  4621. 00:41:13,460 --> 00:41:16,060
  4622. - Just a lot more wax.
  4623. - Okay.
  4624.  
  4625. 1014
  4626. 00:41:16,060 --> 00:41:17,970
  4627. - So just give me one second.
  4628. - Sure.
  4629.  
  4630. 1015
  4631. 00:41:19,870 --> 00:41:21,370
  4632. Wow. Okay.
  4633.  
  4634. 1016
  4635. 00:41:23,070 --> 00:41:25,470
  4636. So, who usually
  4637. waxes your balls?
  4638.  
  4639. 1017
  4640. 00:41:25,470 --> 00:41:27,540
  4641. Oh, I go to a woman
  4642. in, uh, Cleveland.
  4643.  
  4644. 1018
  4645. 00:41:27,540 --> 00:41:29,740
  4646. - Which is where I'm from.
  4647. - No way.
  4648.  
  4649. 1019
  4650. 00:41:29,750 --> 00:41:31,550
  4651. - What?
  4652. - I'm from Edgewater.
  4653.  
  4654. 1020
  4655. 00:41:31,550 --> 00:41:33,210
  4656. - You're from Edgewater?
  4657. - Yeah.
  4658.  
  4659. 1021
  4660. 00:41:33,220 --> 00:41:35,220
  4661. - I'm from Tremont!
  4662. - Oh, my God. Small world.
  4663.  
  4664. 1022
  4665. 00:41:35,220 --> 00:41:37,150
  4666. - Unbelievable.
  4667. - That is so weird!
  4668.  
  4669. 1023
  4670. 00:41:37,150 --> 00:41:39,290
  4671. Like... Right?
  4672.  
  4673. 1024
  4674. 00:41:39,290 --> 00:41:41,760
  4675. Wow. Okay, um...
  4676.  
  4677. 1025
  4678. 00:41:41,760 --> 00:41:44,160
  4679. If you could just, uh,
  4680. lift that penis up for me.
  4681.  
  4682. 1026
  4683. 00:41:44,160 --> 00:41:45,560
  4684. Okay.
  4685.  
  4686. 1027
  4687. 00:41:45,560 --> 00:41:46,960
  4688. Yeah, that's great.
  4689.  
  4690. 1028
  4691. 00:41:46,960 --> 00:41:49,130
  4692. So, uh, what brings you
  4693. to Chicago, Ty?
  4694.  
  4695. 1029
  4696. 00:41:49,130 --> 00:41:52,000
  4697. Well, I'm in town to do
  4698. a few Sexy Santa competitions.
  4699.  
  4700. 1030
  4701. 00:41:52,000 --> 00:41:53,430
  4702. - Nice!
  4703. - Yeah.
  4704.  
  4705. 1031
  4706. 00:41:53,440 --> 00:41:55,610
  4707. Okay, slight sting
  4708. on your nutsack.
  4709.  
  4710. 1032
  4711. 00:41:58,510 --> 00:42:01,450
  4712. (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
  4713.  
  4714. 1033
  4715. 00:42:03,980 --> 00:42:06,750
  4716. So, um, how did you
  4717. get into dancing?
  4718.  
  4719. 1034
  4720. 00:42:06,750 --> 00:42:09,820
  4721. Oh, I'm a fireman by trade.
  4722. That's what I do.
  4723.  
  4724. 1035
  4725. 00:42:09,820 --> 00:42:10,950
  4726. Of course you are.
  4727.  
  4728. 1036
  4729. 00:42:10,950 --> 00:42:12,190
  4730. And a few years ago
  4731.  
  4732. 1037
  4733. 00:42:12,190 --> 00:42:14,420
  4734. I responded to this fire
  4735. at a strip club.
  4736.  
  4737. 1038
  4738. 00:42:14,420 --> 00:42:16,620
  4739. And the owner comes up to me,
  4740. and he's like
  4741.  
  4742. 1039
  4743. 00:42:16,630 --> 00:42:19,490
  4744. "Hey, dude.
  4745. You got a massive cock?"
  4746.  
  4747. 1040
  4748. 00:42:19,500 --> 00:42:23,300
  4749. And I'm like,
  4750. "Uh... Well, I do."
  4751.  
  4752. 1041
  4753. 00:42:23,300 --> 00:42:25,100
  4754. And the rest is,
  4755. the rest is history.
  4756.  
  4757. 1042
  4758. 00:42:25,100 --> 00:42:26,500
  4759. Wow.
  4760.  
  4761. 1043
  4762. 00:42:26,500 --> 00:42:28,700
  4763. That's a beautiful story, Ty.
  4764.  
  4765. 1044
  4766. 00:42:28,700 --> 00:42:31,140
  4767. Thank you.
  4768.  
  4769. 1045
  4770. 00:42:31,140 --> 00:42:32,480
  4771. Okay. Hot burn.
  4772.  
  4773. 1046
  4774. 00:42:34,540 --> 00:42:37,940
  4775. - So, um, holidays, huh?
  4776. - I know.
  4777.  
  4778. 1047
  4779. 00:42:37,950 --> 00:42:39,880
  4780. You got big plans
  4781. with your girlfriend?
  4782.  
  4783. 1048
  4784. 00:42:39,880 --> 00:42:42,320
  4785. I wish. I wish
  4786. I had a girlfriend.
  4787.  
  4788. 1049
  4789. 00:42:42,320 --> 00:42:45,020
  4790. Yeah, most women,
  4791. they just see me as this object
  4792.  
  4793. 1050
  4794. 00:42:45,020 --> 00:42:47,890
  4795. to have sex with
  4796. and then they leave. You know?
  4797.  
  4798. 1051
  4799. 00:42:47,890 --> 00:42:49,190
  4800. And I'm like,
  4801. "Yeah, I dance around
  4802.  
  4803. 1052
  4804. 00:42:49,190 --> 00:42:51,390
  4805. "in basketball sneakers
  4806. and a G-string.
  4807.  
  4808. 1053
  4809. 00:42:51,390 --> 00:42:53,730
  4810. It doesn't mean
  4811. I don't have feelings." Right?
  4812.  
  4813. 1054
  4814. 00:42:53,730 --> 00:42:55,330
  4815. Yeah.
  4816.  
  4817. 1055
  4818. 00:42:55,330 --> 00:42:56,900
  4819. I, uh...
  4820.  
  4821. 1056
  4822. 00:42:56,900 --> 00:42:58,400
  4823. I can relate.
  4824.  
  4825. 1057
  4826. 00:42:58,400 --> 00:42:59,800
  4827. I don't know what it is
  4828. about you, I just...
  4829.  
  4830. 1058
  4831. 00:42:59,800 --> 00:43:01,170
  4832. I feel like you're easy
  4833. to talk to, you know?
  4834.  
  4835. 1059
  4836. 00:43:01,170 --> 00:43:05,140
  4837. I can just open up.
  4838. Be myself. It's nice.
  4839.  
  4840. 1060
  4841. 00:43:05,140 --> 00:43:06,680
  4842. I feel the same way, Ty.
  4843.  
  4844. 1061
  4845. 00:43:09,880 --> 00:43:12,010
  4846. Okay, um,
  4847. I'm gonna need you
  4848.  
  4849. 1062
  4850. 00:43:12,020 --> 00:43:14,380
  4851. to, uh, put your heels
  4852. over your head
  4853.  
  4854. 1063
  4855. 00:43:14,380 --> 00:43:17,650
  4856. so I can start to go to town
  4857. on your taint and your butthole.
  4858.  
  4859. 1064
  4860. 00:43:17,650 --> 00:43:19,250
  4861. - Yep.
  4862. - Great. Thanks.
  4863.  
  4864. 1065
  4865. 00:43:19,250 --> 00:43:20,490
  4866. - Alright.
  4867. - Okay.
  4868.  
  4869. 1066
  4870. 00:43:20,490 --> 00:43:21,890
  4871. Let's get these
  4872. out of the way.
  4873.  
  4874. 1067
  4875. 00:43:21,890 --> 00:43:23,660
  4876. Right. There we go.
  4877. Great, great, great.
  4878.  
  4879. 1068
  4880. 00:43:23,660 --> 00:43:25,730
  4881. Carla, uh...
  4882.  
  4883. 1069
  4884. 00:43:25,730 --> 00:43:28,430
  4885. At the risk of sounding forward
  4886.  
  4887. 1070
  4888. 00:43:28,430 --> 00:43:31,270
  4889. um, would you be willing
  4890. to come with me
  4891.  
  4892. 1071
  4893. 00:43:31,270 --> 00:43:33,900
  4894. to my Sexy Santa
  4895. Competition tonight?
  4896.  
  4897. 1072
  4898. 00:43:33,900 --> 00:43:36,370
  4899. Uh, well, I-I don't date
  4900. my clients, Ty.
  4901.  
  4902. 1073
  4903. 00:43:36,370 --> 00:43:38,840
  4904. I have a really strict code.
  4905.  
  4906. 1074
  4907. 00:43:38,840 --> 00:43:41,180
  4908. Yeah. Oh, of course you do.
  4909. Are you kidding me?
  4910.  
  4911. 1075
  4912. 00:43:41,180 --> 00:43:43,110
  4913. I know. And I know. And-and you
  4914. should. You should have a...
  4915.  
  4916. 1076
  4917. 00:43:43,110 --> 00:43:46,280
  4918. I'm just fuckin' with you, Ty.
  4919. I don't have a code!
  4920.  
  4921. 1077
  4922. 00:43:46,280 --> 00:43:48,780
  4923. I'm waxing your butthole.
  4924.  
  4925. 1078
  4926. 00:43:48,790 --> 00:43:50,520
  4927. I would love to go to your show.
  4928.  
  4929. 1079
  4930. 00:43:50,520 --> 00:43:52,190
  4931. - You would?
  4932. - Yes!
  4933.  
  4934. 1080
  4935. 00:43:52,190 --> 00:43:53,450
  4936. Yes! Oh, my God.
  4937.  
  4938. 1081
  4939. 00:43:53,460 --> 00:43:55,220
  4940. She's funny and she's beautiful.
  4941.  
  4942. 1082
  4943. 00:43:55,220 --> 00:43:57,560
  4944. This is a combination you don't
  4945. run into every day, you know.
  4946.  
  4947. 1083
  4948. 00:43:57,560 --> 00:44:00,690
  4949. Well, you don't see this combo
  4950. that often, either.
  4951.  
  4952. 1084
  4953. 00:44:00,700 --> 00:44:03,930
  4954. So it's a date, then.
  4955. I'll see you tonight.
  4956.  
  4957. 1085
  4958. 00:44:03,930 --> 00:44:05,770
  4959. It's a date.
  4960.  
  4961. 1086
  4962. 00:44:05,770 --> 00:44:08,230
  4963. Oh, um, do you want me
  4964. to reach down there
  4965.  
  4966. 1087
  4967. 00:44:08,240 --> 00:44:11,040
  4968. and-and I can pull my butt crack
  4969. open for you if you want.
  4970.  
  4971. 1088
  4972. 00:44:11,040 --> 00:44:13,240
  4973. Thank you.
  4974.  
  4975. 1089
  4976. 00:44:13,240 --> 00:44:15,880
  4977. No one's ever asked
  4978. if they could hold
  4979.  
  4980. 1090
  4981. 00:44:15,880 --> 00:44:19,150
  4982. their butt crack
  4983. open for me before.
  4984.  
  4985. 1091
  4986. 00:44:19,150 --> 00:44:21,820
  4987. I'll hold my butt crack open
  4988. for you anytime you want, Carla.
  4989.  
  4990. 1092
  4991. 00:44:24,220 --> 00:44:26,590
  4992. Where did you come from,
  4993. Ty Swindel?
  4994.  
  4995. 1093
  4996. 00:44:35,970 --> 00:44:38,230
  4997. So what brings you
  4998. here today, Kiki?
  4999.  
  5000. 1094
  5001. 00:44:38,230 --> 00:44:41,770
  5002. Well, um, my mom and I,
  5003. we're very close.
  5004.  
  5005. 1095
  5006. 00:44:41,770 --> 00:44:43,970
  5007. And we would like to be...
  5008.  
  5009. 1096
  5010. 00:44:43,970 --> 00:44:45,010
  5011. To be closer.
  5012.  
  5013. 1097
  5014. 00:44:45,010 --> 00:44:47,010
  5015. No. No.
  5016.  
  5017. 1098
  5018. 00:44:47,010 --> 00:44:50,010
  5019. I think, uh, we would,
  5020. we would like to be
  5021.  
  5022. 1099
  5023. 00:44:50,010 --> 00:44:51,780
  5024. a little more independent.
  5025.  
  5026. 1100
  5027. 00:44:51,780 --> 00:44:53,150
  5028. Closer.
  5029.  
  5030. 1101
  5031. 00:44:53,150 --> 00:44:55,420
  5032. Uh, Sandy, tell me
  5033.  
  5034. 1102
  5035. 00:44:55,420 --> 00:44:57,250
  5036. about your relationship
  5037. with your daughter.
  5038.  
  5039. 1103
  5040. 00:44:57,250 --> 00:45:00,590
  5041. Oh, my gosh.
  5042. That's my favorite topic.
  5043.  
  5044. 1104
  5045. 00:45:00,590 --> 00:45:04,760
  5046. Well, I had Kiki
  5047. when I was 18 years old.
  5048.  
  5049. 1105
  5050. 00:45:04,760 --> 00:45:07,160
  5051. And when the nurse
  5052. placed her on my breast
  5053.  
  5054. 1106
  5055. 00:45:07,160 --> 00:45:08,600
  5056. I looked down at her
  5057. and I said
  5058.  
  5059. 1107
  5060. 00:45:08,600 --> 00:45:12,200
  5061. "You are gonna be
  5062. my best friend forever."
  5063.  
  5064. 1108
  5065. 00:45:12,200 --> 00:45:14,870
  5066. Is that normal?
  5067. The best friend forever thing?
  5068.  
  5069. 1109
  5070. 00:45:14,870 --> 00:45:16,640
  5071. Uh, well, you know,
  5072. we don't like to use the word
  5073.  
  5074. 1110
  5075. 00:45:16,640 --> 00:45:18,540
  5076. "Normal" around here.
  5077.  
  5078. 1111
  5079. 00:45:20,680 --> 00:45:24,210
  5080. Anyways, Kiki and I have
  5081. always been super close
  5082.  
  5083. 1112
  5084. 00:45:24,210 --> 00:45:26,450
  5085. because we're basically
  5086. the same age.
  5087.  
  5088. 1113
  5089. 00:45:26,450 --> 00:45:28,310
  5090. And then my husband died
  5091.  
  5092. 1114
  5093. 00:45:28,320 --> 00:45:31,850
  5094. and we became crazy close.
  5095.  
  5096. 1115
  5097. 00:45:31,850 --> 00:45:33,350
  5098. We went to prom together.
  5099.  
  5100. 1116
  5101. 00:45:33,360 --> 00:45:35,560
  5102. Wow!
  5103.  
  5104. 1117
  5105. 00:45:35,560 --> 00:45:36,790
  5106. Okay.
  5107.  
  5108. 1118
  5109. 00:45:36,790 --> 00:45:39,630
  5110. And, uh, Kiki, uh...
  5111.  
  5112. 1119
  5113. 00:45:39,630 --> 00:45:41,830
  5114. How does all this closeness
  5115. make you feel?
  5116.  
  5117. 1120
  5118. 00:45:41,830 --> 00:45:43,330
  5119. - Well...
  5120. - Well, she feels great.
  5121.  
  5122. 1121
  5123. 00:45:43,330 --> 00:45:45,870
  5124. Who wouldn't want to be
  5125. best friends with their mom?
  5126.  
  5127. 1122
  5128. 00:45:45,870 --> 00:45:47,700
  5129. - I love my mom.
  5130. - Thank you, honey.
  5131.  
  5132. 1123
  5133. 00:45:47,700 --> 00:45:49,340
  5134. - I really do.
  5135. - Thank you.
  5136.  
  5137. 1124
  5138. 00:45:49,340 --> 00:45:51,740
  5139. But sometimes,
  5140. she can be a bit much.
  5141.  
  5142. 1125
  5143. 00:45:51,740 --> 00:45:53,240
  5144. What?
  5145.  
  5146. 1126
  5147. 00:45:53,240 --> 00:45:56,380
  5148. - Like when?
  5149. - Like, uh...
  5150.  
  5151. 1127
  5152. 00:45:56,380 --> 00:45:58,680
  5153. When you watched Kent and I
  5154. have sex the other night.
  5155.  
  5156. 1128
  5157. 00:45:58,680 --> 00:46:00,310
  5158. Oh, Lord.
  5159.  
  5160. 1129
  5161. 00:46:00,320 --> 00:46:01,880
  5162. I just wanna know
  5163. what's going on in your life.
  5164.  
  5165. 1130
  5166. 00:46:01,880 --> 00:46:03,680
  5167. - Is that so wrong?
  5168. - No.
  5169.  
  5170. 1131
  5171. 00:46:03,690 --> 00:46:05,350
  5172. But sometimes, I just...
  5173.  
  5174. 1132
  5175. 00:46:05,350 --> 00:46:07,260
  5176. I'm in need of a little space.
  5177.  
  5178. 1133
  5179. 00:46:08,830 --> 00:46:11,690
  5180. Oh, boy. I don't know
  5181. what's happening right now.
  5182.  
  5183. 1134
  5184. 00:46:11,690 --> 00:46:15,830
  5185. - W-why are you turning on me?
  5186. - I'm not turning on you.
  5187.  
  5188. 1135
  5189. 00:46:15,830 --> 00:46:18,270
  5190. I'm just saying,
  5191. I think that we could benefit
  5192.  
  5193. 1136
  5194. 00:46:18,270 --> 00:46:20,170
  5195. from some boundaries, right?
  5196.  
  5197. 1137
  5198. 00:46:20,170 --> 00:46:21,200
  5199. I have cancer.
  5200.  
  5201. 1138
  5202. 00:46:23,170 --> 00:46:25,240
  5203. - Cancer?
  5204. - Mm-hm, mm-hm.
  5205.  
  5206. 1139
  5207. 00:46:25,240 --> 00:46:26,940
  5208. Oh, God. What kind of cancer?
  5209.  
  5210. 1140
  5211. 00:46:29,880 --> 00:46:32,950
  5212. Heart... cancer.
  5213.  
  5214. 1141
  5215. 00:46:36,790 --> 00:46:38,080
  5216. - Heart cancer?
  5217. - Yeah.
  5218.  
  5219. 1142
  5220. 00:46:38,090 --> 00:46:40,350
  5221. Stage 12.
  5222.  
  5223. 1143
  5224. 00:46:40,360 --> 00:46:42,760
  5225. Maybe you can find it
  5226. in your non-cancerous heart
  5227.  
  5228. 1144
  5229. 00:46:42,760 --> 00:46:44,890
  5230. to be nice to me before I die.
  5231.  
  5232. 1145
  5233. 00:46:46,430 --> 00:46:50,260
  5234. I'm so sorry, mom.
  5235. I had... I had no idea.
  5236.  
  5237. 1146
  5238. 00:46:50,270 --> 00:46:53,530
  5239. I know. I know.
  5240.  
  5241. 1147
  5242. 00:46:53,540 --> 00:46:54,910
  5243. (CRYING)
  5244. Oh, God.
  5245.  
  5246. 1148
  5247. 00:46:57,970 --> 00:46:59,470
  5248. KIKI:
  5249. Mom.
  5250.  
  5251. 1149
  5252. 00:46:59,470 --> 00:47:01,240
  5253. Oh, Keeks.
  5254.  
  5255. 1150
  5256. 00:47:01,240 --> 00:47:04,310
  5257. Oh, Kiki. No, no. Keeks.
  5258.  
  5259. 1151
  5260. 00:47:04,310 --> 00:47:06,750
  5261. - Okay, I don't have cancer.
  5262. - What?
  5263.  
  5264. 1152
  5265. 00:47:06,750 --> 00:47:07,780
  5266. I knew it.
  5267.  
  5268. 1153
  5269. 00:47:07,780 --> 00:47:09,780
  5270. But imagine if I did have cancer
  5271.  
  5272. 1154
  5273. 00:47:09,790 --> 00:47:12,390
  5274. how would you feel
  5275. being so mean to your mother?
  5276.  
  5277. 1155
  5278. 00:47:12,390 --> 00:47:14,290
  5279. I'm not trying
  5280. to be mean to you, mom.
  5281.  
  5282. 1156
  5283. 00:47:14,290 --> 00:47:15,920
  5284. I'm trying to have
  5285. an honest conversation
  5286.  
  5287. 1157
  5288. 00:47:15,930 --> 00:47:17,090
  5289. about our relationship.
  5290.  
  5291. 1158
  5292. 00:47:17,090 --> 00:47:18,490
  5293. - I have cancer again.
  5294. - No.
  5295.  
  5296. 1159
  5297. 00:47:18,490 --> 00:47:19,960
  5298. It doesn't work like that
  5299. a second time.
  5300.  
  5301. 1160
  5302. 00:47:19,960 --> 00:47:22,300
  5303. - I have polio.
  5304. - I think they cured polio.
  5305.  
  5306. 1161
  5307. 00:47:22,300 --> 00:47:24,460
  5308. - I have bubonic plague.
  5309. - No.
  5310.  
  5311. 1162
  5312. 00:47:24,470 --> 00:47:25,800
  5313. - I have shingles.
  5314. - Mom!
  5315.  
  5316. 1163
  5317. 00:47:25,800 --> 00:47:27,170
  5318. I have bird flu.
  5319.  
  5320. 1164
  5321. 00:47:27,170 --> 00:47:29,300
  5322. - Are you done?
  5323. - I have a lazy eye.
  5324.  
  5325. 1165
  5326. 00:47:29,310 --> 00:47:30,740
  5327. Mom!
  5328.  
  5329. 1166
  5330. 00:47:30,740 --> 00:47:33,310
  5331. Please, can we just talk
  5332. about our relationship?
  5333.  
  5334. 1167
  5335. 00:47:33,310 --> 00:47:35,280
  5336. Because I wanna work
  5337. this out with you.
  5338.  
  5339. 1168
  5340. 00:47:35,280 --> 00:47:36,980
  5341. Yes.
  5342.  
  5343. 1169
  5344. 00:47:36,980 --> 00:47:39,680
  5345. Let's do that. Yes.
  5346.  
  5347. 1170
  5348. 00:47:39,680 --> 00:47:41,250
  5349. - Really?
  5350. - Yes.
  5351.  
  5352. 1171
  5353. 00:47:41,250 --> 00:47:42,280
  5354. I wanna work this out with you.
  5355.  
  5356. 1172
  5357. 00:47:42,290 --> 00:47:43,420
  5358. Honestly?
  5359.  
  5360. 1173
  5361. 00:47:43,420 --> 00:47:44,650
  5362. I'm gonna run
  5363. to the ladies' room
  5364.  
  5365. 1174
  5366. 00:47:44,650 --> 00:47:46,420
  5367. and I will be right back.
  5368.  
  5369. 1175
  5370. 00:47:46,420 --> 00:47:47,490
  5371. Okay.
  5372.  
  5373. 1176
  5374. 00:48:01,670 --> 00:48:03,640
  5375. She's not coming back, is she?
  5376.  
  5377. 1177
  5378. 00:48:03,640 --> 00:48:05,510
  5379. No.
  5380.  
  5381. 1178
  5382. 00:48:05,510 --> 00:48:07,470
  5383. What is the matter with her?
  5384.  
  5385. 1179
  5386. 00:48:07,480 --> 00:48:10,610
  5387. - You really wanna know?
  5388. - Yeah.
  5389.  
  5390. 1180
  5391. 00:48:10,610 --> 00:48:13,780
  5392. Your mom was probably pretty
  5393. normal before she had you.
  5394.  
  5395. 1181
  5396. 00:48:13,780 --> 00:48:15,220
  5397. But then you were born.
  5398.  
  5399. 1182
  5400. 00:48:15,220 --> 00:48:16,850
  5401. And you didn't sleep
  5402. for six months
  5403.  
  5404. 1183
  5405. 00:48:16,850 --> 00:48:18,720
  5406. so she didn't sleep
  5407. for six months.
  5408.  
  5409. 1184
  5410. 00:48:18,720 --> 00:48:21,620
  5411. And you refused to eat,
  5412. and when you did eat
  5413.  
  5414. 1185
  5415. 00:48:21,620 --> 00:48:23,320
  5416. you would barf
  5417. all over her clothes.
  5418.  
  5419. 1186
  5420. 00:48:23,330 --> 00:48:25,460
  5421. And that made your mom
  5422. a little crazy.
  5423.  
  5424. 1187
  5425. 00:48:25,460 --> 00:48:27,960
  5426. And then you fell off your bike
  5427. and you broke your arm.
  5428.  
  5429. 1188
  5430. 00:48:27,960 --> 00:48:29,560
  5431. And then you got bullied
  5432. in school.
  5433.  
  5434. 1189
  5435. 00:48:29,560 --> 00:48:31,400
  5436. And then you started dating
  5437. that weird dude
  5438.  
  5439. 1190
  5440. 00:48:31,400 --> 00:48:33,170
  5441. with the stick through his nose.
  5442.  
  5443. 1191
  5444. 00:48:33,170 --> 00:48:34,970
  5445. And all those things
  5446. made your mom
  5447.  
  5448. 1192
  5449. 00:48:34,970 --> 00:48:36,640
  5450. a little more crazy.
  5451.  
  5452. 1193
  5453. 00:48:36,640 --> 00:48:38,070
  5454. And then you got married.
  5455.  
  5456. 1194
  5457. 00:48:38,070 --> 00:48:39,870
  5458. And you bought a house
  5459. you can't afford.
  5460.  
  5461. 1195
  5462. 00:48:39,880 --> 00:48:41,680
  5463. And you're raising kids
  5464. who never say
  5465.  
  5466. 1196
  5467. 00:48:41,680 --> 00:48:43,210
  5468. "Please" or "Thank you."
  5469.  
  5470. 1197
  5471. 00:48:43,210 --> 00:48:45,040
  5472. Shit, they can't even read.
  5473.  
  5474. 1198
  5475. 00:48:45,050 --> 00:48:47,010
  5476. And all those things
  5477. made your mom
  5478.  
  5479. 1199
  5480. 00:48:47,020 --> 00:48:48,550
  5481. super-duper crazy.
  5482.  
  5483. 1200
  5484. 00:48:48,550 --> 00:48:50,850
  5485. And now you come
  5486. into my office, and you go
  5487.  
  5488. 1201
  5489. 00:48:50,850 --> 00:48:53,990
  5490. "Dr. Karl,
  5491. why is my mom so crazy?"
  5492.  
  5493. 1202
  5494. 00:48:53,990 --> 00:48:56,760
  5495. And the answer is...
  5496.  
  5497. 1203
  5498. 00:48:56,760 --> 00:48:58,020
  5499. you, motherfucker.
  5500.  
  5501. 1204
  5502. 00:48:58,030 --> 00:48:59,860
  5503. You made your mom crazy.
  5504.  
  5505. 1205
  5506. 00:48:59,860 --> 00:49:02,060
  5507. So be nice to your mom,
  5508. 'cause you're the one
  5509.  
  5510. 1206
  5511. 00:49:02,060 --> 00:49:04,000
  5512. who fucked her shit up.
  5513.  
  5514. 1207
  5515. 00:49:04,000 --> 00:49:08,170
  5516. ♪ You make it feel
  5517. like Christmas ♪♪
  5518.  
  5519. 1208
  5520. 00:49:08,170 --> 00:49:12,270
  5521. We are gonna dominate
  5522. caroling this year.
  5523.  
  5524. 1209
  5525. 00:49:12,270 --> 00:49:13,840
  5526. What are you wearing?
  5527.  
  5528. 1210
  5529. 00:49:13,840 --> 00:49:15,580
  5530. Sweetie, if you wanna win
  5531. the Caroling Cup
  5532.  
  5533. 1211
  5534. 00:49:15,580 --> 00:49:17,280
  5535. you have to have a theme.
  5536.  
  5537. 1212
  5538. 00:49:17,280 --> 00:49:18,950
  5539. Which is why we are all going
  5540.  
  5541. 1213
  5542. 00:49:18,950 --> 00:49:21,550
  5543. as characters
  5544. from "A Christmas Carol."
  5545.  
  5546. 1214
  5547. 00:49:21,550 --> 00:49:24,450
  5548. - Oh, my God!
  5549. - Dylan, you're Marley's Ghost.
  5550.  
  5551. 1215
  5552. 00:49:24,450 --> 00:49:27,350
  5553. Jane, you are the Ghost
  5554. of Christmas Present.
  5555.  
  5556. 1216
  5557. 00:49:27,360 --> 00:49:28,590
  5558. Oh, great.
  5559.  
  5560. 1217
  5561. 00:49:28,590 --> 00:49:30,620
  5562. And Amy, you're Scrooge.
  5563.  
  5564. 1218
  5565. 00:49:30,630 --> 00:49:32,730
  5566. Oh. Wow, thanks, mom.
  5567.  
  5568. 1219
  5569. 00:49:32,730 --> 00:49:34,560
  5570. I just think it's appropriate,
  5571. given how much
  5572.  
  5573. 1220
  5574. 00:49:34,560 --> 00:49:36,630
  5575. you seem to hate
  5576. Christmas this year.
  5577.  
  5578. 1221
  5579. 00:49:36,630 --> 00:49:38,600
  5580. Mother, I don't hate Christmas.
  5581.  
  5582. 1222
  5583. 00:49:38,600 --> 00:49:40,470
  5584. And here is
  5585. everyone's sheet music.
  5586.  
  5587. 1223
  5588. 00:49:40,470 --> 00:49:42,470
  5589. I'd hoped we'd all be
  5590. off-book by now.
  5591.  
  5592. 1224
  5593. 00:49:42,470 --> 00:49:44,310
  5594. - This is a lot of songs.
  5595. - Well...
  5596.  
  5597. 1225
  5598. 00:49:44,310 --> 00:49:46,640
  5599. Every home in Westbury gets to
  5600. vote on who wins the Cup.
  5601.  
  5602. 1226
  5603. 00:49:46,640 --> 00:49:50,110
  5604. So we have to hit at least
  5605. 300 houses tonight.
  5606.  
  5607. 1227
  5608. 00:49:50,110 --> 00:49:51,380
  5609. Three hundred?
  5610.  
  5611. 1228
  5612. 00:49:51,380 --> 00:49:52,880
  5613. Don't worry. We have back-up.
  5614.  
  5615. 1229
  5616. 00:49:52,880 --> 00:49:54,950
  5617. Come on in, everybody.
  5618.  
  5619. 1230
  5620. 00:49:54,950 --> 00:49:58,650
  5621. Please welcome
  5622. the Chicago All Saints Choir.
  5623.  
  5624. 1231
  5625. 00:49:58,650 --> 00:50:00,390
  5626. You hired ringers?
  5627.  
  5628. 1232
  5629. 00:50:00,390 --> 00:50:03,390
  5630. I did what I needed to do
  5631. to succeed, Amy.
  5632.  
  5633. 1233
  5634. 00:50:03,390 --> 00:50:05,160
  5635. You should try it sometime.
  5636.  
  5637. 1234
  5638. 00:50:05,160 --> 00:50:07,890
  5639. Okay, fine.
  5640. We'll go caroling.
  5641.  
  5642. 1235
  5643. 00:50:07,900 --> 00:50:10,130
  5644. But I'm not wearing
  5645. this ridiculous costume.
  5646.  
  5647. 1236
  5648. 00:50:13,770 --> 00:50:15,670
  5649. Fuck me.
  5650.  
  5651. 1237
  5652. 00:50:17,110 --> 00:50:18,410
  5653. (DOORBELL RINGS)
  5654.  
  5655. 1238
  5656. 00:50:22,980 --> 00:50:25,080
  5657. Hey, guys, we got more carolers.
  5658.  
  5659. 1239
  5660. 00:50:25,080 --> 00:50:27,080
  5661. (WHISPERING)
  5662. Read your line, Scrooge!
  5663.  
  5664. 1240
  5665. 00:50:28,820 --> 00:50:30,350
  5666. - Do it.
  5667. - Mm.
  5668.  
  5669. 1241
  5670. 00:50:32,020 --> 00:50:33,920
  5671. "Bah-humbug,
  5672. I'm Ebenezer Scrooge
  5673.  
  5674. 1242
  5675. 00:50:33,920 --> 00:50:35,460
  5676. "and I hate Christmas
  5677. because it's so much work
  5678.  
  5679. 1243
  5680. 00:50:35,460 --> 00:50:37,160
  5681. and I am lazy."
  5682.  
  5683. 1244
  5684. 00:50:37,160 --> 00:50:39,090
  5685. Please, Mr. Scrooge!
  5686.  
  5687. 1245
  5688. 00:50:39,100 --> 00:50:41,160
  5689. Won't you listen
  5690. to our song?
  5691.  
  5692. 1246
  5693. 00:50:41,160 --> 00:50:45,270
  5694. And let ye heart be warmed!
  5695. Two, three, four.
  5696.  
  5697. 1247
  5698. 00:50:45,270 --> 00:50:49,970
  5699. ♪ We wish you
  5700. a merry Christmas ♪
  5701.  
  5702. 1248
  5703. 00:50:49,970 --> 00:50:53,010
  5704. ♪ We wish you a merry
  5705. Christmas ♪
  5706.  
  5707. 1249
  5708. 00:50:53,010 --> 00:50:55,780
  5709. ♪ We wish you
  5710. a merry Christmas ♪
  5711.  
  5712. 1250
  5713. 00:50:55,780 --> 00:50:59,050
  5714. ♪ And a happy New Year ♪
  5715.  
  5716. 1251
  5717. 00:50:59,050 --> 00:51:02,150
  5718. ♪ Good tidings we bring ♪
  5719.  
  5720. 1252
  5721. 00:51:02,150 --> 00:51:04,520
  5722. ♪ To you and your kids ♪
  5723.  
  5724. 1253
  5725. 00:51:04,520 --> 00:51:07,850
  5726. ♪ Yeah good tidings
  5727. for Christmas ♪
  5728.  
  5729. 1254
  5730. 00:51:07,860 --> 00:51:09,860
  5731. What the fuck
  5732. is happening?
  5733.  
  5734. 1255
  5735. 00:51:09,860 --> 00:51:12,460
  5736. ♪ Happy New Year
  5737. everybody ♪
  5738.  
  5739. 1256
  5740. 00:51:12,460 --> 00:51:13,730
  5741. (DOORBELL RINGING)
  5742.  
  5743. 1257
  5744. 00:51:13,730 --> 00:51:16,400
  5745. ♪ And a happy New Year ♪
  5746.  
  5747. 1258
  5748. 00:51:16,400 --> 00:51:18,340
  5749. (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
  5750.  
  5751. 1259
  5752. 00:51:21,370 --> 00:51:23,070
  5753. (DOORBELL RINGING)
  5754.  
  5755. 1260
  5756. 00:51:27,810 --> 00:51:29,980
  5757. "Bah-humbug,
  5758. I'm Ebenezer Scrooge
  5759.  
  5760. 1261
  5761. 00:51:29,980 --> 00:51:31,980
  5762. and I hate Christmas
  5763. because it's so much work..."
  5764.  
  5765. 1262
  5766. 00:51:31,980 --> 00:51:34,380
  5767. Amy?
  5768.  
  5769. 1263
  5770. 00:51:34,380 --> 00:51:36,050
  5771. Oh, shit!
  5772.  
  5773. 1264
  5774. 00:51:36,050 --> 00:51:39,590
  5775. What in the fuck
  5776. are you wearing?
  5777.  
  5778. 1265
  5779. 00:51:39,590 --> 00:51:41,320
  5780. My mom made me wear this.
  5781.  
  5782. 1266
  5783. 00:51:41,320 --> 00:51:44,260
  5784. Oh, my God!
  5785. You look amazing, serious...
  5786.  
  5787. 1267
  5788. 00:51:44,260 --> 00:51:46,530
  5789. Honestly, this is better than
  5790. what you usually wear at school.
  5791.  
  5792. 1268
  5793. 00:51:46,530 --> 00:51:47,860
  5794. - Wait, guys, come here.
  5795. - No, no, guys, it's okay.
  5796.  
  5797. 1269
  5798. 00:51:47,860 --> 00:51:48,930
  5799. You could, you could
  5800. just stay there, it's...
  5801.  
  5802. 1270
  5803. 00:51:48,930 --> 00:51:50,230
  5804. This is Amy Mitchell.
  5805.  
  5806. 1271
  5807. 00:51:50,230 --> 00:51:52,030
  5808. She's dressed up
  5809. as an old fat man.
  5810.  
  5811. 1272
  5812. 00:51:52,030 --> 00:51:54,730
  5813. Uh, no, I'm actually supposed
  5814. to be Scrooge, but that's...
  5815.  
  5816. 1273
  5817. 00:51:54,740 --> 00:51:56,900
  5818. Don't laugh, she's my friend.
  5819. That's rude.
  5820.  
  5821. 1274
  5822. 00:51:56,910 --> 00:51:59,070
  5823. Honey, I'm going to Instagram
  5824. the shit out of this, right now.
  5825.  
  5826. 1275
  5827. 00:51:59,080 --> 00:52:00,240
  5828. - Okay, wait. Side angle.
  5829. - Oh, great!
  5830.  
  5831. 1276
  5832. 00:52:00,240 --> 00:52:02,080
  5833. - And this one.
  5834. - Okay, um.
  5835.  
  5836. 1277
  5837. 00:52:02,080 --> 00:52:04,110
  5838. Can you do a li... Can you purse
  5839. your lips for me a little bit?
  5840.  
  5841. 1278
  5842. 00:52:04,110 --> 00:52:05,910
  5843. I'm gonna go kill myself, so...
  5844.  
  5845. 1279
  5846. 00:52:05,910 --> 00:52:08,750
  5847. I'll put a filter on it,
  5848. so you don't look so tired.
  5849.  
  5850. 1280
  5851. 00:52:08,750 --> 00:52:11,120
  5852. - Thank you for visiting, Amy!
  5853. - Bye.
  5854.  
  5855. 1281
  5856. 00:52:11,120 --> 00:52:13,020
  5857. I will never let you
  5858. forget this.
  5859.  
  5860. 1282
  5861. 00:52:13,020 --> 00:52:15,460
  5862. - You know that.
  5863. - I do.
  5864.  
  5865. 1283
  5866. 00:52:15,460 --> 00:52:17,390
  5867. Was that a broken dick
  5868. on her face?
  5869.  
  5870. 1284
  5871. 00:52:20,730 --> 00:52:23,760
  5872. Well, I thought that was
  5873. an enormous success.
  5874.  
  5875. 1285
  5876. 00:52:23,770 --> 00:52:25,930
  5877. Mom, this, this,
  5878. this isn't working.
  5879.  
  5880. 1286
  5881. 00:52:25,930 --> 00:52:27,700
  5882. - What isn't working?
  5883. - This, this.
  5884.  
  5885. 1287
  5886. 00:52:27,700 --> 00:52:29,440
  5887. I-I wanted a mellow Christmas
  5888.  
  5889. 1288
  5890. 00:52:29,440 --> 00:52:31,410
  5891. and you keep fighting me
  5892. every step of the way.
  5893.  
  5894. 1289
  5895. 00:52:31,410 --> 00:52:34,210
  5896. Amy, this is a very important
  5897. Christmas for your kids.
  5898.  
  5899. 1290
  5900. 00:52:34,210 --> 00:52:35,910
  5901. You cannot just phone it in.
  5902.  
  5903. 1291
  5904. 00:52:35,910 --> 00:52:38,210
  5905. I'm not,
  5906. I'm not phoning it in.
  5907.  
  5908. 1292
  5909. 00:52:38,210 --> 00:52:41,280
  5910. My kids told me that
  5911. they wanted a mellow Christmas.
  5912.  
  5913. 1293
  5914. 00:52:41,280 --> 00:52:43,450
  5915. And I promised them
  5916. that I would give it to them.
  5917.  
  5918. 1294
  5919. 00:52:43,450 --> 00:52:45,220
  5920. Well, of course
  5921. they told you that, Amy.
  5922.  
  5923. 1295
  5924. 00:52:45,220 --> 00:52:47,620
  5925. Because they're telling you what
  5926. they think you want to hear.
  5927.  
  5928. 1296
  5929. 00:52:47,620 --> 00:52:48,990
  5930. But secretly,
  5931. they know that I'm right.
  5932.  
  5933. 1297
  5934. 00:52:48,990 --> 00:52:51,430
  5935. Because you know what?
  5936. I just am.
  5937.  
  5938. 1298
  5939. 00:52:51,430 --> 00:52:53,060
  5940. Okay.
  5941.  
  5942. 1299
  5943. 00:52:53,060 --> 00:52:56,500
  5944. Ha-ha! You know what?
  5945. I'm done fighting this.
  5946.  
  5947. 1300
  5948. 00:52:56,500 --> 00:52:58,430
  5949. I'm gonna tell you exactly
  5950.  
  5951. 1301
  5952. 00:52:58,430 --> 00:53:00,470
  5953. how we're doing Christmas
  5954. this year.
  5955.  
  5956. 1302
  5957. 00:53:00,470 --> 00:53:02,300
  5958. The kids and I
  5959. are gonna spend
  5960.  
  5961. 1303
  5962. 00:53:02,300 --> 00:53:04,000
  5963. the entire Christmas Eve day
  5964. sledding.
  5965.  
  5966. 1304
  5967. 00:53:04,010 --> 00:53:05,440
  5968. And then,
  5969. we're gonna come home
  5970.  
  5971. 1305
  5972. 00:53:05,440 --> 00:53:07,910
  5973. bake cookies,
  5974. and watch "Love Actually."
  5975.  
  5976. 1306
  5977. 00:53:07,910 --> 00:53:10,410
  5978. - Dumb movie.
  5979. - Then, Christmas morning.
  5980.  
  5981. 1307
  5982. 00:53:10,410 --> 00:53:12,780
  5983. Only Jessie and his daughter
  5984. are gonna come over
  5985.  
  5986. 1308
  5987. 00:53:12,780 --> 00:53:15,180
  5988. and we're gonna exchange
  5989. three gifts.
  5990.  
  5991. 1309
  5992. 00:53:15,180 --> 00:53:16,920
  5993. Who's Jessie?
  5994.  
  5995. 1310
  5996. 00:53:16,920 --> 00:53:18,620
  5997. Then we're gonna spend
  5998. all day in our pajamas
  5999.  
  6000. 1311
  6001. 00:53:18,620 --> 00:53:20,790
  6002. until my friends
  6003. come over for dinner
  6004.  
  6005. 1312
  6006. 00:53:20,790 --> 00:53:23,920
  6007. when we are gonna order
  6008. Chinese takeout from Mr. Wang's.
  6009.  
  6010. 1313
  6011. 00:53:23,930 --> 00:53:25,530
  6012. - The horror.
  6013. - Ugh!
  6014.  
  6015. 1314
  6016. 00:53:25,530 --> 00:53:27,490
  6017. There'll be
  6018. no show-offy party
  6019.  
  6020. 1315
  6021. 00:53:27,500 --> 00:53:30,000
  6022. no sushi, no camels.
  6023.  
  6024. 1316
  6025. 00:53:30,000 --> 00:53:34,870
  6026. And definitely, definitely,
  6027. no Kenny G.
  6028.  
  6029. 1317
  6030. 00:53:34,870 --> 00:53:37,170
  6031. Amy, he is the godfather
  6032. of smooth jazz.
  6033.  
  6034. 1318
  6035. 00:53:37,170 --> 00:53:40,340
  6036. Mom, I am done with
  6037. your over-the-top Christmases.
  6038.  
  6039. 1319
  6040. 00:53:40,340 --> 00:53:42,180
  6041. This is my house,
  6042. and this is my life.
  6043.  
  6044. 1320
  6045. 00:53:42,180 --> 00:53:43,640
  6046. And if you want
  6047. to come down here
  6048.  
  6049. 1321
  6050. 00:53:43,650 --> 00:53:45,950
  6051. and be a part
  6052. of my family
  6053.  
  6054. 1322
  6055. 00:53:45,950 --> 00:53:48,050
  6056. then you have to live
  6057. by my rules.
  6058.  
  6059. 1323
  6060. 00:53:51,790 --> 00:53:53,950
  6061. - Okay.
  6062. - Really?
  6063.  
  6064. 1324
  6065. 00:53:53,960 --> 00:53:55,120
  6066. We will do it your way.
  6067.  
  6068. 1325
  6069. 00:53:57,030 --> 00:53:59,360
  6070. We will have
  6071. a mellow Christmas.
  6072.  
  6073. 1326
  6074. 00:54:01,030 --> 00:54:03,300
  6075. I hope you're happy.
  6076.  
  6077. 1327
  6078. 00:54:03,300 --> 00:54:04,400
  6079. I don't think you mean that.
  6080.  
  6081. 1328
  6082. 00:54:04,400 --> 00:54:06,330
  6083. But thank you, I am.
  6084.  
  6085. 1329
  6086. 00:54:06,330 --> 00:54:11,340
  6087. ♪ You can have my
  6088. sugar sugar sugar baby ♪
  6089.  
  6090. 1330
  6091. 00:54:11,340 --> 00:54:15,910
  6092. ♪ Wanna give you my
  6093. sugar sugar sugar baby ♪
  6094.  
  6095. 1331
  6096. 00:54:15,910 --> 00:54:19,050
  6097. ♪ Wanna give it to you ♪
  6098.  
  6099. 1332
  6100. 00:54:20,580 --> 00:54:23,550
  6101. ♪ If you want me to ♪
  6102.  
  6103. 1333
  6104. 00:54:23,550 --> 00:54:25,420
  6105. (ALL LAUGHING)
  6106.  
  6107. 1334
  6108. 00:54:26,590 --> 00:54:28,060
  6109. And it worked.
  6110.  
  6111. 1335
  6112. 00:54:28,060 --> 00:54:29,720
  6113. I stood up to her,
  6114. and she totally backed down.
  6115.  
  6116. 1336
  6117. 00:54:29,720 --> 00:54:32,230
  6118. - I'm so proud of you.
  6119. - Thank you.
  6120.  
  6121. 1337
  6122. 00:54:32,230 --> 00:54:33,390
  6123. I actually felt,
  6124. for the first time
  6125.  
  6126. 1338
  6127. 00:54:33,390 --> 00:54:35,160
  6128. my mom looked at me
  6129. as an equal.
  6130.  
  6131. 1339
  6132. 00:54:35,160 --> 00:54:39,500
  6133. Like maybe someday,
  6134. somehow, we could be closer.
  6135.  
  6136. 1340
  6137. 00:54:39,500 --> 00:54:40,870
  6138. Relax, Obama.
  6139.  
  6140. 1341
  6141. 00:54:40,870 --> 00:54:43,100
  6142. Your mom is still
  6143. a colossal bitch.
  6144.  
  6145. 1342
  6146. 00:54:43,100 --> 00:54:45,840
  6147. Don't let your guard down,
  6148. or she's gonna blow up your car.
  6149.  
  6150. 1343
  6151. 00:54:45,840 --> 00:54:47,510
  6152. - Alright, alright.
  6153. - I'm just saying.
  6154.  
  6155. 1344
  6156. 00:54:47,510 --> 00:54:49,680
  6157. Well, either way,
  6158. it was a big step.
  6159.  
  6160. 1345
  6161. 00:54:49,680 --> 00:54:52,910
  6162. So, I just wanna say thank you
  6163. for encouraging me.
  6164.  
  6165. 1346
  6166. 00:54:52,910 --> 00:54:56,620
  6167. - Aww, we're so proud. Whoo!
  6168. - Thank you.
  6169.  
  6170. 1347
  6171. 00:54:56,620 --> 00:54:58,790
  6172. You know what I think
  6173. we should do to celebrate?
  6174.  
  6175. 1348
  6176. 00:54:58,790 --> 00:55:00,890
  6177. Watch a bunch of Santa Clauses
  6178.  
  6179. 1349
  6180. 00:55:00,890 --> 00:55:04,260
  6181. take off their clothes!
  6182.  
  6183. 1350
  6184. 00:55:04,260 --> 00:55:06,630
  6185. ♪ Give me the green light ♪
  6186.  
  6187. 1351
  6188. 00:55:06,630 --> 00:55:08,130
  6189. ♪ 'Cause I'm ready to go ♪
  6190.  
  6191. 1352
  6192. 00:55:08,130 --> 00:55:11,030
  6193. ♪ Let's have a good time ♪
  6194.  
  6195. 1353
  6196. 00:55:11,030 --> 00:55:12,430
  6197. ♪ What you waiting for? ♪
  6198.  
  6199. 1354
  6200. 00:55:12,430 --> 00:55:15,070
  6201. ♪ We only got one life ♪
  6202.  
  6203. 1355
  6204. 00:55:15,070 --> 00:55:16,400
  6205. ♪ And we gonna live it up ♪
  6206.  
  6207. 1356
  6208. 00:55:16,410 --> 00:55:19,470
  6209. Oh, yay!
  6210. I love Santa Claus.
  6211.  
  6212. 1357
  6213. 00:55:19,470 --> 00:55:22,040
  6214. KIKI:
  6215. And there's so many of them.
  6216.  
  6217. 1358
  6218. 00:55:22,040 --> 00:55:25,140
  6219. Guys, I don't wanna make
  6220. a big deal of it.
  6221.  
  6222. 1359
  6223. 00:55:25,150 --> 00:55:27,750
  6224. But, um, I'm kind of
  6225. on a first date
  6226.  
  6227. 1360
  6228. 00:55:27,750 --> 00:55:28,980
  6229. with one of the Santas.
  6230.  
  6231. 1361
  6232. 00:55:28,980 --> 00:55:30,420
  6233. - Shut up.
  6234. - Yeah.
  6235.  
  6236. 1362
  6237. 00:55:30,420 --> 00:55:32,750
  6238. Wait. Which one?
  6239.  
  6240. 1363
  6241. 00:55:32,750 --> 00:55:35,760
  6242. Santa number two.
  6243.  
  6244. 1364
  6245. 00:55:35,760 --> 00:55:38,060
  6246. ♪ If you know what I mean
  6247. I'mma ride that mami ♪
  6248.  
  6249. 1365
  6250. 00:55:38,060 --> 00:55:40,060
  6251. ♪ Yeah I got the key
  6252. and I'mma lock that mami... ♪
  6253.  
  6254. 1366
  6255. 00:55:40,060 --> 00:55:41,230
  6256. How'd you guys meet?
  6257.  
  6258. 1367
  6259. 00:55:41,230 --> 00:55:42,630
  6260. Oh, waxing his balls.
  6261.  
  6262. 1368
  6263. 00:55:42,630 --> 00:55:44,630
  6264. That is so romantic.
  6265.  
  6266. 1369
  6267. 00:55:44,630 --> 00:55:47,430
  6268. You learn a lot about a man
  6269. when you wax his sack.
  6270.  
  6271. 1370
  6272. 00:55:47,440 --> 00:55:50,670
  6273. You know, some guys cry.
  6274. Some guys act real tough.
  6275.  
  6276. 1371
  6277. 00:55:50,670 --> 00:55:55,270
  6278. But... But Ty, he was so calm.
  6279.  
  6280. 1372
  6281. 00:55:55,280 --> 00:55:59,110
  6282. It was almost like waxing
  6283. the balls of the Dalai Lama.
  6284.  
  6285. 1373
  6286. 00:55:59,110 --> 00:56:00,150
  6287. Whoo!
  6288.  
  6289. 1374
  6290. 00:56:01,320 --> 00:56:03,650
  6291. How you doin' tonight, Chicago?
  6292.  
  6293. 1375
  6294. 00:56:03,650 --> 00:56:05,080
  6295. (ALL CHEERING)
  6296.  
  6297. 1376
  6298. 00:56:05,090 --> 00:56:06,120
  6299. Alright.
  6300.  
  6301. 1377
  6302. 00:56:06,120 --> 00:56:07,290
  6303. Okay, listen, ladies
  6304.  
  6305. 1378
  6306. 00:56:07,290 --> 00:56:09,090
  6307. I need you guys to tell me
  6308.  
  6309. 1379
  6310. 00:56:09,090 --> 00:56:10,790
  6311. which one of these Sexy Santas
  6312.  
  6313. 1380
  6314. 00:56:10,790 --> 00:56:13,330
  6315. is the sexiest of them all?
  6316.  
  6317. 1381
  6318. 00:56:13,330 --> 00:56:15,630
  6319. Think you're ready? Yeah!
  6320.  
  6321. 1382
  6322. 00:56:15,630 --> 00:56:17,200
  6323. Okay, well,
  6324. let's start this thing off.
  6325.  
  6326. 1383
  6327. 00:56:17,200 --> 00:56:19,430
  6328. Santa number one,
  6329. the bar is yours, sir.
  6330.  
  6331. 1384
  6332. 00:56:19,430 --> 00:56:22,340
  6333. (UPBEAT MUSIC)
  6334.  
  6335. 1385
  6336. 00:56:28,010 --> 00:56:29,350
  6337. (ALL GASPING)
  6338.  
  6339. 1386
  6340. 00:56:32,280 --> 00:56:35,180
  6341. Oh. That is a lot of white skin.
  6342.  
  6343. 1387
  6344. 00:56:35,980 --> 00:56:38,790
  6345. (BABBLING)
  6346.  
  6347. 1388
  6348. 00:56:38,790 --> 00:56:41,390
  6349. (INDISTINCT CLAMORING)
  6350.  
  6351. 1389
  6352. 00:56:41,390 --> 00:56:43,360
  6353. Okay, you know what? Alright,
  6354. alright, Santa number one.
  6355.  
  6356. 1390
  6357. 00:56:43,360 --> 00:56:44,890
  6358. The audience has spoken.
  6359.  
  6360. 1391
  6361. 00:56:44,890 --> 00:56:46,360
  6362. Thank you. Such a good sport.
  6363.  
  6364. 1392
  6365. 00:56:46,360 --> 00:56:48,060
  6366. Such a good sport.
  6367.  
  6368. 1393
  6369. 00:56:48,060 --> 00:56:50,730
  6370. Alright. Now.
  6371.  
  6372. 1394
  6373. 00:56:50,730 --> 00:56:52,330
  6374. Bring it to the stage,
  6375. my man
  6376.  
  6377. 1395
  6378. 00:56:52,330 --> 00:56:56,070
  6379. Santa number two!
  6380.  
  6381. 1396
  6382. 00:56:56,070 --> 00:56:58,010
  6383. (ALL CHEERING)
  6384.  
  6385. 1397
  6386. 00:57:05,180 --> 00:57:07,380
  6387. (UPBEAT MUSIC)
  6388.  
  6389. 1398
  6390. 00:57:18,430 --> 00:57:21,030
  6391. Yeah! Take it off!
  6392.  
  6393. 1399
  6394. 00:57:37,450 --> 00:57:40,380
  6395. He's, he's really good
  6396. at stripping.
  6397.  
  6398. 1400
  6399. 00:57:40,380 --> 00:57:43,250
  6400. - He has such kind eyes.
  6401. - Yeah.
  6402.  
  6403. 1401
  6404. 00:57:43,250 --> 00:57:45,190
  6405. I'm gonna fuck
  6406. his dick off tonight.
  6407.  
  6408. 1402
  6409. 00:57:48,720 --> 00:57:52,060
  6410. Put a baby in me,
  6411. Santa number two!
  6412.  
  6413. 1403
  6414. 00:57:53,260 --> 00:57:54,400
  6415. Whoo!
  6416.  
  6417. 1404
  6418. 00:57:56,130 --> 00:57:58,800
  6419. Whoo! I love his panties.
  6420. They're so seasonal.
  6421.  
  6422. 1405
  6423. 00:58:01,070 --> 00:58:02,970
  6424. (ALL CHEERING)
  6425.  
  6426. 1406
  6427. 00:58:07,310 --> 00:58:09,080
  6428. Oh, my God.
  6429.  
  6430. 1407
  6431. 00:58:11,210 --> 00:58:12,910
  6432. (MUSIC CONTINUES)
  6433.  
  6434. 1408
  6435. 00:58:12,910 --> 00:58:16,050
  6436. - I think I'm in love.
  6437. - What?
  6438.  
  6439. 1409
  6440. 00:58:16,050 --> 00:58:20,220
  6441. I honestly think
  6442. that he's... the one.
  6443.  
  6444. 1410
  6445. 00:58:21,490 --> 00:58:22,590
  6446. Is that your mom?
  6447.  
  6448. 1411
  6449. 00:58:23,930 --> 00:58:25,260
  6450. (MUSIC CONTINUES)
  6451.  
  6452. 1412
  6453. 00:58:27,100 --> 00:58:30,160
  6454. Wait, holy shit. It is.
  6455. Why is... Mom!
  6456.  
  6457. 1413
  6458. 00:58:30,160 --> 00:58:32,470
  6459. What, what are you doing?
  6460.  
  6461. 1414
  6462. 00:58:32,470 --> 00:58:34,070
  6463. - Oh, look at that.
  6464. - Yeah.
  6465.  
  6466. 1415
  6467. 00:58:34,070 --> 00:58:36,170
  6468. My mom dances this way
  6469. with everybody.
  6470.  
  6471. 1416
  6472. 00:58:38,470 --> 00:58:40,810
  6473. So, this doesn't bother me
  6474. at all.
  6475.  
  6476. 1417
  6477. 00:58:43,640 --> 00:58:45,480
  6478. Oh, my God.
  6479. His face is in her tits.
  6480.  
  6481. 1418
  6482. 00:58:45,480 --> 00:58:47,910
  6483. Wait. Mom.
  6484. Mom, no motorboating!
  6485.  
  6486. 1419
  6487. 00:58:47,920 --> 00:58:49,480
  6488. - We talked about this.
  6489. - Alright.
  6490.  
  6491. 1420
  6492. 00:58:49,490 --> 00:58:51,080
  6493. - It's about to get weird.
  6494. - It's game time.
  6495.  
  6496. 1421
  6497. 00:58:51,090 --> 00:58:52,850
  6498. - Oh, you look great!
  6499. - That's my mom.
  6500.  
  6501. 1422
  6502. 00:58:52,850 --> 00:58:54,290
  6503. - That's your mom?
  6504. - Yeah, that's my mom.
  6505.  
  6506. 1423
  6507. 00:58:54,290 --> 00:58:56,090
  6508. - Your mom?
  6509. - Yeah.
  6510.  
  6511. 1424
  6512. 00:58:56,090 --> 00:58:58,520
  6513. Oh, my God, it's a pleasure.
  6514. You have such a lovely daughter.
  6515.  
  6516. 1425
  6517. 00:58:58,530 --> 00:58:59,630
  6518. I know.
  6519.  
  6520. 1426
  6521. 00:58:59,630 --> 00:59:01,530
  6522. (ALL CHEERING)
  6523.  
  6524. 1427
  6525. 00:59:03,500 --> 00:59:05,160
  6526. You should never have to watch
  6527.  
  6528. 1428
  6529. 00:59:05,170 --> 00:59:07,500
  6530. your mom lick
  6531. your boyfriend's nipples.
  6532.  
  6533. 1429
  6534. 00:59:07,500 --> 00:59:09,540
  6535. - No.
  6536. - Mom!
  6537.  
  6538. 1430
  6539. 00:59:09,540 --> 00:59:11,940
  6540. What are you doing?
  6541.  
  6542. 1431
  6543. 00:59:11,940 --> 00:59:13,970
  6544. - Whoa.
  6545. - Oh, my God.
  6546.  
  6547. 1432
  6548. 00:59:13,980 --> 00:59:15,270
  6549. (ALL GASPING)
  6550.  
  6551. 1433
  6552. 00:59:15,280 --> 00:59:17,040
  6553. Mom!
  6554.  
  6555. 1434
  6556. 00:59:17,040 --> 00:59:18,980
  6557. (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
  6558.  
  6559. 1435
  6560. 00:59:21,380 --> 00:59:23,820
  6561. Not one person caught me.
  6562. That was amazing.
  6563.  
  6564. 1436
  6565. 00:59:23,820 --> 00:59:26,720
  6566. Every time they jump into
  6567. the crowd, someone usually...
  6568.  
  6569. 1437
  6570. 00:59:26,720 --> 00:59:28,350
  6571. - Hi.
  6572. - Oh.
  6573.  
  6574. 1438
  6575. 00:59:28,360 --> 00:59:30,390
  6576. - Hi. Hey.
  6577. - Here you are.
  6578.  
  6579. 1439
  6580. 00:59:30,390 --> 00:59:33,530
  6581. I, uh... Bag of ice for you.
  6582.  
  6583. 1440
  6584. 00:59:33,530 --> 00:59:35,470
  6585. - Oh.
  6586. - Thank you, Ty.
  6587.  
  6588. 1441
  6589. 00:59:36,060 --> 00:59:37,060
  6590. Um...
  6591.  
  6592. 1442
  6593. 00:59:38,630 --> 00:59:40,200
  6594. So, about tonight, um, you know
  6595.  
  6596. 1443
  6597. 00:59:40,200 --> 00:59:42,140
  6598. we were gonna hang out
  6599. after the show.
  6600.  
  6601. 1444
  6602. 00:59:42,140 --> 00:59:43,970
  6603. And, uh, I mean,
  6604. I was looking forward to it.
  6605.  
  6606. 1445
  6607. 00:59:43,970 --> 00:59:45,710
  6608. I was wondering if, uh...
  6609.  
  6610. 1446
  6611. 00:59:45,710 --> 00:59:47,070
  6612. If you're still up for it,
  6613. you know?
  6614.  
  6615. 1447
  6616. 00:59:47,080 --> 00:59:49,340
  6617. - Oh, Ty.
  6618. - Yeah.
  6619.  
  6620. 1448
  6621. 00:59:49,340 --> 00:59:50,340
  6622. Um...
  6623.  
  6624. 1449
  6625. 00:59:52,150 --> 00:59:54,150
  6626. - I would love to.
  6627. - Good.
  6628.  
  6629. 1450
  6630. 00:59:54,150 --> 00:59:55,180
  6631. But, um...
  6632.  
  6633. 1451
  6634. 00:59:55,180 --> 00:59:56,720
  6635. You know, I think this is
  6636.  
  6637. 1452
  6638. 00:59:56,720 --> 00:59:58,720
  6639. my mom's third concussion
  6640. this month and I'm just...
  6641.  
  6642. 1453
  6643. 00:59:58,720 --> 01:00:01,520
  6644. Wow, that's
  6645. a lot of concussions.
  6646.  
  6647. 1454
  6648. 01:00:01,520 --> 01:00:04,360
  6649. Better stay with her
  6650. for observation.
  6651.  
  6652. 1455
  6653. 01:00:04,360 --> 01:00:05,360
  6654. Yeah.
  6655.  
  6656. 1456
  6657. 01:00:06,930 --> 01:00:08,260
  6658. Well, um...
  6659.  
  6660. 1457
  6661. 01:00:09,830 --> 01:00:12,000
  6662. I gotta get back
  6663. to Cleveland tomorrow.
  6664.  
  6665. 1458
  6666. 01:00:12,000 --> 01:00:14,870
  6667. - Right.
  6668. - But, uh...
  6669.  
  6670. 1459
  6671. 01:00:14,870 --> 01:00:16,870
  6672. Think I could give you a call
  6673. next time I come into town?
  6674.  
  6675. 1460
  6676. 01:00:16,870 --> 01:00:19,170
  6677. Would that...
  6678. that interest you at all?
  6679.  
  6680. 1461
  6681. 01:00:19,170 --> 01:00:20,240
  6682. Could I do that?
  6683.  
  6684. 1462
  6685. 01:00:20,240 --> 01:00:21,270
  6686. - Please.
  6687. - Yeah?
  6688.  
  6689. 1463
  6690. 01:00:21,280 --> 01:00:22,710
  6691. - Yes.
  6692. - Great.
  6693.  
  6694. 1464
  6695. 01:00:22,710 --> 01:00:25,540
  6696. I'd, I'd wax your balls
  6697. for free.
  6698.  
  6699. 1465
  6700. 01:00:25,550 --> 01:00:28,080
  6701. That is so sweet.
  6702.  
  6703. 1466
  6704. 01:00:28,080 --> 01:00:30,450
  6705. Well, I would really
  6706. love that, Carla.
  6707.  
  6708. 1467
  6709. 01:00:32,050 --> 01:00:33,950
  6710. And so would my balls.
  6711.  
  6712. 1468
  6713. 01:00:33,960 --> 01:00:36,860
  6714. Well. Consider it done.
  6715.  
  6716. 1469
  6717. 01:00:36,860 --> 01:00:37,860
  6718. And, uh...
  6719.  
  6720. 1470
  6721. 01:00:39,790 --> 01:00:41,260
  6722. Oh.
  6723.  
  6724. 1471
  6725. 01:00:41,260 --> 01:00:42,970
  6726. Sorry, I thought
  6727. you wanted to...
  6728.  
  6729. 1472
  6730. 01:00:44,930 --> 01:00:47,370
  6731. Merry Christmas, Carla.
  6732.  
  6733. 1473
  6734. 01:00:47,370 --> 01:00:48,700
  6735. Merry Christmas, Ty.
  6736.  
  6737. 1474
  6738. 01:00:53,580 --> 01:00:57,110
  6739. ♪ Bells will be ringing ♪
  6740.  
  6741. 1475
  6742. 01:00:57,110 --> 01:01:01,410
  6743. ♪ The glad glad news ♪
  6744.  
  6745. 1476
  6746. 01:01:01,420 --> 01:01:05,820
  6747. ♪ Oh what a Christmas ♪
  6748.  
  6749. 1477
  6750. 01:01:05,820 --> 01:01:09,920
  6751. ♪ You have the blues ♪
  6752.  
  6753. 1478
  6754. 01:01:09,930 --> 01:01:13,590
  6755. ♪ My baby's gone ♪
  6756.  
  6757. 1479
  6758. 01:01:13,600 --> 01:01:17,900
  6759. ♪ I have no friends ♪
  6760.  
  6761. 1480
  6762. 01:01:17,900 --> 01:01:21,300
  6763. ♪ To wish me greetings ♪
  6764.  
  6765. 1481
  6766. 01:01:21,300 --> 01:01:22,740
  6767. ♪ Mm ♪
  6768.  
  6769. 1482
  6770. 01:01:22,740 --> 01:01:25,270
  6771. ♪ Once again ♪
  6772.  
  6773. 1483
  6774. 01:01:27,240 --> 01:01:30,640
  6775. Okay, time for bed,
  6776. my darlings.
  6777.  
  6778. 1484
  6779. 01:01:30,650 --> 01:01:32,810
  6780. Tonight, I am
  6781. going to sing you
  6782.  
  6783. 1485
  6784. 01:01:32,810 --> 01:01:34,680
  6785. "My Heart Will Go On"
  6786.  
  6787. 1486
  6788. 01:01:34,680 --> 01:01:38,450
  6789. by seven-time Grammy winner,
  6790. Celine Dion.
  6791.  
  6792. 1487
  6793. 01:01:38,450 --> 01:01:39,450
  6794. Mm-hm?
  6795.  
  6796. 1488
  6797. 01:01:42,160 --> 01:01:43,530
  6798. What's the matter?
  6799.  
  6800. 1489
  6801. 01:01:45,590 --> 01:01:47,460
  6802. Is everything okay
  6803. with you and mom?
  6804.  
  6805. 1490
  6806. 01:01:47,460 --> 01:01:49,630
  6807. Yeah, you guys
  6808. have been fighting a lot.
  6809.  
  6810. 1491
  6811. 01:01:49,630 --> 01:01:52,170
  6812. Come here and sit by me.
  6813. Both of you, come here.
  6814.  
  6815. 1492
  6816. 01:01:54,540 --> 01:01:58,600
  6817. Now, your mother and I just
  6818. have a few tiny disagreements
  6819.  
  6820. 1493
  6821. 01:01:58,610 --> 01:02:00,140
  6822. about the importance
  6823. of Christmas
  6824.  
  6825. 1494
  6826. 01:02:00,140 --> 01:02:01,810
  6827. and what it means to be a mother
  6828.  
  6829. 1495
  6830. 01:02:01,810 --> 01:02:04,310
  6831. and the sanctity of marriage
  6832. and how best to raise children.
  6833.  
  6834. 1496
  6835. 01:02:04,310 --> 01:02:06,650
  6836. But otherwise,
  6837. everything is fine.
  6838.  
  6839. 1497
  6840. 01:02:06,650 --> 01:02:10,550
  6841. There's no reason
  6842. to worry, okay?
  6843.  
  6844. 1498
  6845. 01:02:10,550 --> 01:02:13,650
  6846. Look, I know
  6847. this is your first Christmas
  6848.  
  6849. 1499
  6850. 01:02:13,660 --> 01:02:15,520
  6851. since your parents got divorced.
  6852.  
  6853. 1500
  6854. 01:02:15,520 --> 01:02:17,890
  6855. And it's probably a little
  6856. strange for you. Am I right?
  6857.  
  6858. 1501
  6859. 01:02:17,890 --> 01:02:19,530
  6860. - Yeah.
  6861. - Yeah. It really is.
  6862.  
  6863. 1502
  6864. 01:02:19,530 --> 01:02:21,390
  6865. Well, first of all
  6866.  
  6867. 1503
  6868. 01:02:21,400 --> 01:02:24,830
  6869. both of your parents
  6870. still love you so very much.
  6871.  
  6872. 1504
  6873. 01:02:24,830 --> 01:02:27,570
  6874. And no matter what happens
  6875.  
  6876. 1505
  6877. 01:02:27,570 --> 01:02:30,840
  6878. I will always be there for you.
  6879.  
  6880. 1506
  6881. 01:02:30,840 --> 01:02:32,570
  6882. Always.
  6883.  
  6884. 1507
  6885. 01:02:32,570 --> 01:02:35,480
  6886. Because you're my grandkids,
  6887. and I love you
  6888.  
  6889. 1508
  6890. 01:02:35,480 --> 01:02:37,840
  6891. more than anything
  6892. in the whole world.
  6893.  
  6894. 1509
  6895. 01:02:37,850 --> 01:02:39,980
  6896. And so does Grandpa Hank.
  6897.  
  6898. 1510
  6899. 01:02:39,980 --> 01:02:41,680
  6900. I know his brain
  6901. is the size of a walnut
  6902.  
  6903. 1511
  6904. 01:02:41,680 --> 01:02:43,590
  6905. but you know,
  6906. his heart is enormous.
  6907.  
  6908. 1512
  6909. 01:02:47,020 --> 01:02:49,760
  6910. - Okay? Feel better?
  6911. - Yeah.
  6912.  
  6913. 1513
  6914. 01:02:49,760 --> 01:02:51,590
  6915. It's really nice
  6916. having you here, grandma.
  6917.  
  6918. 1514
  6919. 01:02:51,590 --> 01:02:54,260
  6920. - Yeah. We really miss you.
  6921. - Yeah.
  6922.  
  6923. 1515
  6924. 01:02:54,260 --> 01:02:57,530
  6925. Oh, I miss you, too.
  6926.  
  6927. 1516
  6928. 01:02:57,530 --> 01:03:01,230
  6929. Grandkids, they really are
  6930. the greatest gift.
  6931.  
  6932. 1517
  6933. 01:03:01,240 --> 01:03:04,940
  6934. Speaking of gifts,
  6935. have some iPhones.
  6936.  
  6937. 1518
  6938. 01:03:04,940 --> 01:03:06,740
  6939. - Nice.
  6940. - No way.
  6941.  
  6942. 1519
  6943. 01:03:06,740 --> 01:03:08,680
  6944. Now, get ready for bed.
  6945.  
  6946. 1520
  6947. 01:03:08,680 --> 01:03:11,950
  6948. And I will come back
  6949. and sing to you for hours.
  6950.  
  6951. 1521
  6952. 01:03:13,180 --> 01:03:14,920
  6953. (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
  6954.  
  6955. 1522
  6956. 01:03:17,750 --> 01:03:20,290
  6957. I can't believe people fall
  6958. for this shit. It's so stupid.
  6959.  
  6960. 1523
  6961. 01:03:20,290 --> 01:03:22,190
  6962. - Yeah, I know.
  6963. - Oh wait, here comes somebody.
  6964.  
  6965. 1524
  6966. 01:03:22,190 --> 01:03:24,060
  6967. - Merry Christmas!
  6968. - Oh, Merry Christmas.
  6969.  
  6970. 1525
  6971. 01:03:24,060 --> 01:03:25,190
  6972. Ho, ho, hold on.
  6973.  
  6974. 1526
  6975. 01:03:25,190 --> 01:03:26,890
  6976. Hey, would you like to,
  6977. uh, donate
  6978.  
  6979. 1527
  6980. 01:03:26,890 --> 01:03:30,300
  6981. your canned goods to our
  6982. Christmas Canned Food Drive?
  6983.  
  6984. 1528
  6985. 01:03:30,300 --> 01:03:32,800
  6986. Oh, um, I sort of just
  6987. bought all this.
  6988.  
  6989. 1529
  6990. 01:03:32,800 --> 01:03:36,270
  6991. - Bingo. She's got cans.
  6992. - Oh!
  6993.  
  6994. 1530
  6995. 01:03:36,270 --> 01:03:38,940
  6996. Oh, mom, look, look, look.
  6997. She's got wine.
  6998.  
  6999. 1531
  7000. 01:03:38,940 --> 01:03:41,270
  7001. Thank you very much
  7002. for a very generous donation
  7003.  
  7004. 1532
  7005. 01:03:41,280 --> 01:03:43,110
  7006. to the "Canned Christmas
  7007. Food Drive."
  7008.  
  7009. 1533
  7010. 01:03:43,110 --> 01:03:44,950
  7011. The children are
  7012. gonna be so happy.
  7013.  
  7014. 1534
  7015. 01:03:45,910 --> 01:03:47,710
  7016. Yes!
  7017.  
  7018. 1535
  7019. 01:03:47,720 --> 01:03:50,450
  7020. - That was a good haul, mom.
  7021. - Yeah, she had some good shit.
  7022.  
  7023. 1536
  7024. 01:03:50,450 --> 01:03:53,250
  7025. You know...
  7026. ripping off rich people
  7027.  
  7028. 1537
  7029. 01:03:53,250 --> 01:03:55,790
  7030. in front of the supermarket
  7031. with you is...
  7032.  
  7033. 1538
  7034. 01:03:55,790 --> 01:03:58,760
  7035. bringing back a lotta happy
  7036. Christmas memories for me.
  7037.  
  7038. 1539
  7039. 01:03:58,760 --> 01:04:01,460
  7040. Yeah. Me too, babe.
  7041.  
  7042. 1540
  7043. 01:04:01,460 --> 01:04:03,630
  7044. I miss you, you know?
  7045.  
  7046. 1541
  7047. 01:04:03,630 --> 01:04:05,330
  7048. I miss you, too.
  7049.  
  7050. 1542
  7051. 01:04:05,330 --> 01:04:08,070
  7052. It's so weird.
  7053.  
  7054. 1543
  7055. 01:04:08,070 --> 01:04:12,240
  7056. Yeah. Maybe we should...
  7057. spend more time together?
  7058.  
  7059. 1544
  7060. 01:04:13,610 --> 01:04:15,940
  7061. Do you mean that?
  7062.  
  7063. 1545
  7064. 01:04:15,940 --> 01:04:17,410
  7065. Yeah.
  7066.  
  7067. 1546
  7068. 01:04:17,410 --> 01:04:18,680
  7069. You know, when we were
  7070. at the bouncy place
  7071.  
  7072. 1547
  7073. 01:04:18,680 --> 01:04:21,480
  7074. with, um... what's his name?
  7075.  
  7076. 1548
  7077. 01:04:21,480 --> 01:04:23,780
  7078. - Oh, my son, Jaxon?
  7079. - Yeah, him.
  7080.  
  7081. 1549
  7082. 01:04:23,790 --> 01:04:26,150
  7083. Um, I was watching you two
  7084. and you were beating the shit
  7085.  
  7086. 1550
  7087. 01:04:26,150 --> 01:04:28,120
  7088. out of each other
  7089. with those sticks, and I thought
  7090.  
  7091. 1551
  7092. 01:04:28,120 --> 01:04:30,820
  7093. "You know, maybe I should have a
  7094. relationship with my grandson."
  7095.  
  7096. 1552
  7097. 01:04:30,830 --> 01:04:34,360
  7098. Well, we'd, um,
  7099. we'd love to see you more.
  7100.  
  7101. 1553
  7102. 01:04:35,200 --> 01:04:38,030
  7103. Yeah. Okay.
  7104.  
  7105. 1554
  7106. 01:04:38,030 --> 01:04:39,830
  7107. You know, uh...
  7108.  
  7109. 1555
  7110. 01:04:39,830 --> 01:04:41,200
  7111. I've been doing
  7112. a lot of thinking
  7113.  
  7114. 1556
  7115. 01:04:41,200 --> 01:04:43,170
  7116. about the money
  7117. you asked me for, mom, and...
  7118.  
  7119. 1557
  7120. 01:04:43,170 --> 01:04:45,540
  7121. Um, I'm such an idiot.
  7122.  
  7123. 1558
  7124. 01:04:45,540 --> 01:04:49,310
  7125. But it's Christmas
  7126. and you're my mom and...
  7127.  
  7128. 1559
  7129. 01:04:50,810 --> 01:04:53,710
  7130. Eh, fuck it. Here.
  7131. It's a loan. It's a loan.
  7132.  
  7133. 1560
  7134. 01:04:53,720 --> 01:04:55,310
  7135. I mean, this is not everything
  7136. you asked for, but...
  7137.  
  7138. 1561
  7139. 01:04:55,320 --> 01:04:57,820
  7140. - Oh, no, that's great!
  7141. - Basically all I have.
  7142.  
  7143. 1562
  7144. 01:04:57,820 --> 01:04:59,480
  7145. Thank you so much.
  7146. This is a loan.
  7147.  
  7148. 1563
  7149. 01:04:59,490 --> 01:05:01,220
  7150. I will pay you back, I swear.
  7151.  
  7152. 1564
  7153. 01:05:01,220 --> 01:05:02,620
  7154. I really have
  7155. my shit together now.
  7156.  
  7157. 1565
  7158. 01:05:02,620 --> 01:05:04,390
  7159. Thanks. Whoa!
  7160.  
  7161. 1566
  7162. 01:05:04,390 --> 01:05:06,630
  7163. Hey! Sir, Merry Christmas!
  7164.  
  7165. 1567
  7166. 01:05:06,630 --> 01:05:08,460
  7167. - Merry Christmas!
  7168. - Merry Christmas!
  7169.  
  7170. 1568
  7171. 01:05:08,460 --> 01:05:11,900
  7172. Would you like to donate your
  7173. cans to our Canned Food Drive?
  7174.  
  7175. 1569
  7176. 01:05:11,900 --> 01:05:14,870
  7177. We're collecting
  7178. for a drive for the homeless.
  7179.  
  7180. 1570
  7181. 01:05:14,870 --> 01:05:17,900
  7182. - Yikes. I just bought all this.
  7183. - And the canned goods.
  7184.  
  7185. 1571
  7186. 01:05:17,910 --> 01:05:19,970
  7187. - You know, this is important.
  7188. - The fuck is this?
  7189.  
  7190. 1572
  7191. 01:05:19,970 --> 01:05:21,810
  7192. Uh, that's fennel.
  7193.  
  7194. 1573
  7195. 01:05:21,810 --> 01:05:23,380
  7196. - Oh, fuck it.
  7197. - So happy.
  7198.  
  7199. 1574
  7200. 01:05:23,380 --> 01:05:25,250
  7201. Thank you so much.
  7202.  
  7203. 1575
  7204. 01:05:25,250 --> 01:05:28,980
  7205. Oh, shit. Manager. Manager's
  7206. coming. Code red, code red.
  7207.  
  7208. 1576
  7209. 01:05:28,980 --> 01:05:30,350
  7210. Go, go, go. Mom!
  7211. Where did we park?
  7212.  
  7213. 1577
  7214. 01:05:30,350 --> 01:05:32,080
  7215. - Where did we park?
  7216. - Happy Hanukkah.
  7217.  
  7218. 1578
  7219. 01:05:32,090 --> 01:05:33,320
  7220. - Where did we park?
  7221. - Go, go, go, go.
  7222.  
  7223. 1579
  7224. 01:05:33,320 --> 01:05:35,890
  7225. They just totally stole
  7226. all my shit.
  7227.  
  7228. 1580
  7229. 01:05:35,890 --> 01:05:37,390
  7230. Taking this, though.
  7231. This is cute, right?
  7232.  
  7233. 1581
  7234. 01:05:37,390 --> 01:05:38,520
  7235. Yeah, yeah.
  7236.  
  7237. 1582
  7238. 01:05:38,530 --> 01:05:40,160
  7239. KIKI:
  7240. Okay, guys.
  7241.  
  7242. 1583
  7243. 01:05:40,160 --> 01:05:42,030
  7244. So since it's Christmas Eve,
  7245. everybody gets to open
  7246.  
  7247. 1584
  7248. 01:05:42,030 --> 01:05:43,530
  7249. one present, okay?
  7250.  
  7251. 1585
  7252. 01:05:43,530 --> 01:05:46,230
  7253. Oh! Kiki. Hey, Kiki, Kiki.
  7254. Open mine.
  7255.  
  7256. 1586
  7257. 01:05:46,230 --> 01:05:48,230
  7258. Please open mine first.
  7259. Please.
  7260.  
  7261. 1587
  7262. 01:05:48,240 --> 01:05:51,040
  7263. - I'll go first. I guess.
  7264. - Okay.
  7265.  
  7266. 1588
  7267. 01:05:53,340 --> 01:05:54,540
  7268. What's this?
  7269.  
  7270. 1589
  7271. 01:05:54,540 --> 01:05:57,280
  7272. It is a key
  7273.  
  7274. 1590
  7275. 01:05:57,280 --> 01:06:00,080
  7276. to my new house!
  7277.  
  7278. 1591
  7279. 01:06:00,080 --> 01:06:01,950
  7280. What are you talking about?
  7281.  
  7282. 1592
  7283. 01:06:01,950 --> 01:06:03,750
  7284. Well, after our therapy session
  7285.  
  7286. 1593
  7287. 01:06:03,750 --> 01:06:05,220
  7288. I felt like
  7289. we were drifting apart.
  7290.  
  7291. 1594
  7292. 01:06:05,220 --> 01:06:08,850
  7293. So I decided to move
  7294. closer to you guys.
  7295.  
  7296. 1595
  7297. 01:06:08,860 --> 01:06:11,890
  7298. Oh. Okay. Uh,
  7299. where are you moving to?
  7300.  
  7301. 1596
  7302. 01:06:11,890 --> 01:06:13,460
  7303. Right next door!
  7304.  
  7305. 1597
  7306. 01:06:13,460 --> 01:06:16,100
  7307. - Jesus.
  7308. - What?
  7309.  
  7310. 1598
  7311. 01:06:16,100 --> 01:06:18,060
  7312. You're moving, um,
  7313. next door to me?
  7314.  
  7315. 1599
  7316. 01:06:18,070 --> 01:06:19,900
  7317. Yeah, the house
  7318. wasn't on the market.
  7319.  
  7320. 1600
  7321. 01:06:19,900 --> 01:06:22,140
  7322. So I checked it out on Zillow
  7323. and I made an all-cash offer.
  7324.  
  7325. 1601
  7326. 01:06:22,140 --> 01:06:24,400
  7327. And then, boom.
  7328. Howdy, neighbor.
  7329.  
  7330. 1602
  7331. 01:06:24,410 --> 01:06:27,110
  7332. - Howdy, neighbor.
  7333. - Oh, my God.
  7334.  
  7335. 1603
  7336. 01:06:27,110 --> 01:06:30,480
  7337. We can dig a tunnel
  7338. between the houses. Keeks!
  7339.  
  7340. 1604
  7341. 01:06:30,480 --> 01:06:32,250
  7342. Oh, Keeks.
  7343.  
  7344. 1605
  7345. 01:06:33,480 --> 01:06:35,050
  7346. Kent, get the kids out of here.
  7347.  
  7348. 1606
  7349. 01:06:35,050 --> 01:06:37,780
  7350. Mm-hm. Yep, yep. Let's go, guys.
  7351. Let's get outta here.
  7352.  
  7353. 1607
  7354. 01:06:37,790 --> 01:06:39,320
  7355. Mommy and grandma gotta talk.
  7356. Come on, buddy.
  7357.  
  7358. 1608
  7359. 01:06:39,320 --> 01:06:41,150
  7360. This is gonna get ugly.
  7361.  
  7362. 1609
  7363. 01:06:41,160 --> 01:06:42,420
  7364. - Mom. Mom.
  7365. - What? What?
  7366.  
  7367. 1610
  7368. 01:06:42,420 --> 01:06:43,990
  7369. You can't live next door to me.
  7370.  
  7371. 1611
  7372. 01:06:43,990 --> 01:06:46,790
  7373. - Why, why not?
  7374. - Because I need space.
  7375.  
  7376. 1612
  7377. 01:06:46,790 --> 01:06:49,160
  7378. And t-that,
  7379. that is too close.
  7380.  
  7381. 1613
  7382. 01:06:50,930 --> 01:06:54,500
  7383. - I have diabetes.
  7384. - Mom, stop.
  7385.  
  7386. 1614
  7387. 01:06:54,500 --> 01:06:56,100
  7388. - Sit down. Sit down.
  7389. - Kiki. Kiki.
  7390.  
  7391. 1615
  7392. 01:06:56,100 --> 01:06:57,270
  7393. - Sit.
  7394. - Kiki.
  7395.  
  7396. 1616
  7397. 01:06:57,270 --> 01:06:58,740
  7398. - I've got strep throat.
  7399. - Mom.
  7400.  
  7401. 1617
  7402. 01:06:58,740 --> 01:07:00,170
  7403. - I might have gallstones...
  7404. - No.
  7405.  
  7406. 1618
  7407. 01:07:00,180 --> 01:07:02,010
  7408. - And really, Kiki, this is...
  7409. - Enough.
  7410.  
  7411. 1619
  7412. 01:07:02,010 --> 01:07:04,510
  7413. We need to have
  7414. this conversation.
  7415.  
  7416. 1620
  7417. 01:07:04,510 --> 01:07:07,610
  7418. I am a grown woman
  7419. who needs a life
  7420.  
  7421. 1621
  7422. 01:07:07,620 --> 01:07:10,020
  7423. that is separate from yours,
  7424. and I need you
  7425.  
  7426. 1622
  7427. 01:07:10,020 --> 01:07:12,850
  7428. to have a life
  7429. that's separate from mine.
  7430.  
  7431. 1623
  7432. 01:07:12,850 --> 01:07:14,790
  7433. I'm sorry.
  7434.  
  7435. 1624
  7436. 01:07:14,790 --> 01:07:17,260
  7437. Kiki, I don't want a life
  7438. separate from yours.
  7439.  
  7440. 1625
  7441. 01:07:17,260 --> 01:07:18,690
  7442. You're my favorite person
  7443. in the whole world.
  7444.  
  7445. 1626
  7446. 01:07:18,690 --> 01:07:20,290
  7447. I know, but, mom,
  7448. this is starting
  7449.  
  7450. 1627
  7451. 01:07:20,290 --> 01:07:21,630
  7452. to affect my marriage.
  7453.  
  7454. 1628
  7455. 01:07:21,630 --> 01:07:23,300
  7456. - What?
  7457. - And my family.
  7458.  
  7459. 1629
  7460. 01:07:23,300 --> 01:07:24,860
  7461. - Oh.
  7462. - And my sanity.
  7463.  
  7464. 1630
  7465. 01:07:24,870 --> 01:07:27,200
  7466. And I just,
  7467. I need you to...
  7468.  
  7469. 1631
  7470. 01:07:27,200 --> 01:07:30,310
  7471. To, to just let me go
  7472. a little bit.
  7473.  
  7474. 1632
  7475. 01:07:32,310 --> 01:07:35,140
  7476. Well, what am I supposed
  7477. to do with myself?
  7478.  
  7479. 1633
  7480. 01:07:35,140 --> 01:07:37,780
  7481. I don't know, mom! Anything!
  7482. Make some friends!
  7483.  
  7484. 1634
  7485. 01:07:37,780 --> 01:07:39,540
  7486. You're always saying
  7487. you wanna go to Vegas
  7488.  
  7489. 1635
  7490. 01:07:39,550 --> 01:07:41,980
  7491. to see Wayne Newton
  7492. before he dies.
  7493.  
  7494. 1636
  7495. 01:07:41,980 --> 01:07:43,950
  7496. Do that! Anything!
  7497.  
  7498. 1637
  7499. 01:07:43,950 --> 01:07:46,120
  7500. As long as it's without me!
  7501.  
  7502. 1638
  7503. 01:07:49,020 --> 01:07:50,030
  7504. Without you?
  7505.  
  7506. 1639
  7507. 01:07:52,790 --> 01:07:54,900
  7508. Why are you doing this
  7509. to me, Kiki?
  7510.  
  7511. 1640
  7512. 01:07:56,330 --> 01:07:58,400
  7513. I didn't... Mom.
  7514.  
  7515. 1641
  7516. 01:07:58,400 --> 01:08:01,900
  7517. And I really don't think
  7518. I can return that house!
  7519.  
  7520. 1642
  7521. 01:08:06,670 --> 01:08:07,670
  7522. (DOOR CLOSES)
  7523.  
  7524. 1643
  7525. 01:08:10,540 --> 01:08:12,480
  7526. - Whoo!
  7527. - Hey.
  7528.  
  7529. 1644
  7530. 01:08:12,480 --> 01:08:14,350
  7531. - How fun was that sledding?
  7532. - Oh, that was fun.
  7533.  
  7534. 1645
  7535. 01:08:14,350 --> 01:08:16,720
  7536. There is still an alarming
  7537. amount of snow
  7538.  
  7539. 1646
  7540. 01:08:16,720 --> 01:08:18,180
  7541. in my pants, I gotta say.
  7542.  
  7543. 1647
  7544. 01:08:18,190 --> 01:08:19,650
  7545. Oh, I can't wait to go home
  7546.  
  7547. 1648
  7548. 01:08:19,650 --> 01:08:22,060
  7549. throw on some jammies,
  7550. get comfy.
  7551.  
  7552. 1649
  7553. 01:08:22,060 --> 01:08:25,520
  7554. I know. It's gonna be... Oh,
  7555. look, someone's having a party.
  7556.  
  7557. 1650
  7558. 01:08:25,530 --> 01:08:27,990
  7559. Yeah, they are.
  7560.  
  7561. 1651
  7562. 01:08:28,000 --> 01:08:30,230
  7563. - Wow, that's a lot of people.
  7564. - A lot of people.
  7565.  
  7566. 1652
  7567. 01:08:30,230 --> 01:08:31,760
  7568. Wait.
  7569.  
  7570. 1653
  7571. 01:08:31,770 --> 01:08:33,500
  7572. You're having a party.
  7573.  
  7574. 1654
  7575. 01:08:34,570 --> 01:08:36,500
  7576. Um, is that a camel?
  7577.  
  7578. 1655
  7579. 01:08:38,540 --> 01:08:40,440
  7580. Yup, that's a camel.
  7581.  
  7582. 1656
  7583. 01:08:42,710 --> 01:08:44,680
  7584. I'm gonna kill her.
  7585.  
  7586. 1657
  7587. 01:08:44,680 --> 01:08:47,580
  7588. (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
  7589.  
  7590. 1658
  7591. 01:08:53,720 --> 01:08:55,620
  7592. What the fuck?
  7593.  
  7594. 1659
  7595. 01:09:01,130 --> 01:09:03,800
  7596. What did she do to my house?
  7597.  
  7598. 1660
  7599. 01:09:03,800 --> 01:09:04,860
  7600. (SPEAKING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
  7601.  
  7602. 1661
  7603. 01:09:04,870 --> 01:09:05,870
  7604. No!
  7605.  
  7606. 1662
  7607. 01:09:06,970 --> 01:09:08,100
  7608. Gomenasai.
  7609.  
  7610. 1663
  7611. 01:09:14,380 --> 01:09:16,750
  7612. (SAXOPHONE MUSIC)
  7613.  
  7614. 1664
  7615. 01:09:20,250 --> 01:09:23,050
  7616. Kenny G's in my den.
  7617.  
  7618. 1665
  7619. 01:09:23,050 --> 01:09:24,950
  7620. (RUTH LAUGHING)
  7621.  
  7622. 1666
  7623. 01:09:28,720 --> 01:09:29,830
  7624. AMY:
  7625. Mom.
  7626.  
  7627. 1667
  7628. 01:09:31,090 --> 01:09:33,000
  7629. You lied to me.
  7630.  
  7631. 1668
  7632. 01:09:34,430 --> 01:09:36,290
  7633. I did what was best
  7634. for the family.
  7635.  
  7636. 1669
  7637. 01:09:36,300 --> 01:09:39,070
  7638. Mom, everything that is wrong
  7639. with Christmas is in this room
  7640.  
  7641. 1670
  7642. 01:09:39,070 --> 01:09:40,430
  7643. and I want it all gone.
  7644.  
  7645. 1671
  7646. 01:09:40,430 --> 01:09:42,170
  7647. Amy, don't be ridiculous.
  7648.  
  7649. 1672
  7650. 01:09:42,170 --> 01:09:44,440
  7651. You can't kick Kenny G
  7652. out of the house.
  7653.  
  7654. 1673
  7655. 01:09:44,440 --> 01:09:45,770
  7656. He's a national treasure.
  7657.  
  7658. 1674
  7659. 01:09:45,770 --> 01:09:47,670
  7660. If you won't do it,
  7661. then I will.
  7662.  
  7663. 1675
  7664. 01:09:47,670 --> 01:09:49,310
  7665. You wouldn't dare.
  7666.  
  7667. 1676
  7668. 01:09:49,310 --> 01:09:51,250
  7669. Oh. Watch me.
  7670.  
  7671. 1677
  7672. 01:09:54,450 --> 01:09:57,480
  7673. Yo! I need you
  7674. to leave my house.
  7675.  
  7676. 1678
  7677. 01:09:57,490 --> 01:09:58,650
  7678. What are you talking about?
  7679.  
  7680. 1679
  7681. 01:09:58,650 --> 01:10:00,920
  7682. Get the fuck out, Kenny G.
  7683.  
  7684. 1680
  7685. 01:10:00,920 --> 01:10:02,290
  7686. - I'm still getting paid, right?
  7687. - I don't know!
  7688.  
  7689. 1681
  7690. 01:10:02,290 --> 01:10:04,760
  7691. Take your little flute and shoo!
  7692. Shoo, fly.
  7693.  
  7694. 1682
  7695. 01:10:04,760 --> 01:10:06,860
  7696. - Go make another album.
  7697. - It's not a flute, bitch.
  7698.  
  7699. 1683
  7700. 01:10:06,860 --> 01:10:09,530
  7701. Don't care. Thank you so much.
  7702. Thank you. You can go now.
  7703.  
  7704. 1684
  7705. 01:10:09,530 --> 01:10:11,500
  7706. Please. You can leave.
  7707. Thank you so much for coming.
  7708.  
  7709. 1685
  7710. 01:10:11,500 --> 01:10:12,930
  7711. Thank you very much.
  7712. You too, my friend.
  7713.  
  7714. 1686
  7715. 01:10:12,930 --> 01:10:14,970
  7716. Please. No, no. Please exit.
  7717.  
  7718. 1687
  7719. 01:10:14,970 --> 01:10:18,170
  7720. I don't know any of you.
  7721. Please leave my house.
  7722.  
  7723. 1688
  7724. 01:10:18,170 --> 01:10:21,010
  7725. Farewell, see you later.
  7726. Sushi chef, you gotta go.
  7727.  
  7728. 1689
  7729. 01:10:21,010 --> 01:10:22,370
  7730. We're done.
  7731. You can take that plate.
  7732.  
  7733. 1690
  7734. 01:10:22,380 --> 01:10:25,210
  7735. Amy, stop!
  7736. You're embarrassing the family.
  7737.  
  7738. 1691
  7739. 01:10:27,180 --> 01:10:29,450
  7740. Oh, my God. That's what
  7741. this is about, isn't it?
  7742.  
  7743. 1692
  7744. 01:10:29,450 --> 01:10:30,980
  7745. This finally makes sense.
  7746.  
  7747. 1693
  7748. 01:10:30,990 --> 01:10:33,150
  7749. The, the perfect decorations,
  7750. the perfect tree
  7751.  
  7752. 1694
  7753. 01:10:33,150 --> 01:10:35,290
  7754. whatever the hell
  7755. that thing is in my front yard.
  7756.  
  7757. 1695
  7758. 01:10:35,290 --> 01:10:38,220
  7759. You didn't do this for the kids!
  7760. You did this for you!
  7761.  
  7762. 1696
  7763. 01:10:38,230 --> 01:10:39,890
  7764. All you care about
  7765. is for people to go
  7766.  
  7767. 1697
  7768. 01:10:39,890 --> 01:10:41,730
  7769. "Oh, Ruth.
  7770. You're so amazing."
  7771.  
  7772. 1698
  7773. 01:10:41,730 --> 01:10:43,460
  7774. I have no idea
  7775. what you're talking about.
  7776.  
  7777. 1699
  7778. 01:10:43,460 --> 01:10:45,000
  7779. Please don't leave
  7780. without taking
  7781.  
  7782. 1700
  7783. 01:10:45,000 --> 01:10:47,130
  7784. your Louis Vuitton swag bag.
  7785.  
  7786. 1701
  7787. 01:10:47,130 --> 01:10:48,800
  7788. Oh, God. Oh, God. Please.
  7789.  
  7790. 1702
  7791. 01:10:48,800 --> 01:10:50,800
  7792. Th-this has got to all go.
  7793. A-all of this has got to go.
  7794.  
  7795. 1703
  7796. 01:10:50,800 --> 01:10:53,070
  7797. Th-the swag bags,
  7798. th-the weird curtains
  7799.  
  7800. 1704
  7801. 01:10:53,070 --> 01:10:54,670
  7802. the floor, the tree.
  7803.  
  7804. 1705
  7805. 01:10:54,680 --> 01:10:57,240
  7806. Oh, God, the tree
  7807. has got to go.
  7808.  
  7809. 1706
  7810. 01:10:57,250 --> 01:10:59,540
  7811. No, not my tree!
  7812. It's from Paris!
  7813.  
  7814. 1707
  7815. 01:10:59,550 --> 01:11:01,810
  7816. - Watch me.
  7817. - No!
  7818.  
  7819. 1708
  7820. 01:11:01,820 --> 01:11:03,350
  7821. No!
  7822.  
  7823. 1709
  7824. 01:11:03,350 --> 01:11:05,220
  7825. Say goodbye to your tree,
  7826. mother!
  7827.  
  7828. 1710
  7829. 01:11:05,220 --> 01:11:08,420
  7830. - That's an antique!
  7831. - It's a hideous tree, mother!
  7832.  
  7833. 1711
  7834. 01:11:08,420 --> 01:11:10,860
  7835. - You have no idea!
  7836. - It's not even real snow!
  7837.  
  7838. 1712
  7839. 01:11:10,860 --> 01:11:12,820
  7840. How dare you! You know
  7841. how much that thing costs?
  7842.  
  7843. 1713
  7844. 01:11:12,830 --> 01:11:14,690
  7845. I don't care! Let go!
  7846.  
  7847. 1714
  7848. 01:11:14,700 --> 01:11:17,360
  7849. Let go! Let go!
  7850.  
  7851. 1715
  7852. 01:11:17,370 --> 01:11:19,830
  7853. Those were from the "Titanic!"
  7854.  
  7855. 1716
  7856. 01:11:19,830 --> 01:11:21,170
  7857. I don't care!
  7858.  
  7859. 1717
  7860. 01:11:24,270 --> 01:11:25,870
  7861. That ice was from the moon!
  7862.  
  7863. 1718
  7864. 01:11:25,870 --> 01:11:28,170
  7865. It was moon ice,
  7866. you nasty bitch!
  7867.  
  7868. 1719
  7869. 01:11:28,180 --> 01:11:30,510
  7870. Let go of the stupid tree!
  7871.  
  7872. 1720
  7873. 01:11:30,510 --> 01:11:32,580
  7874. Let go!
  7875.  
  7876. 1721
  7877. 01:11:32,580 --> 01:11:33,950
  7878. Listen, mom!
  7879.  
  7880. 1722
  7881. 01:11:33,950 --> 01:11:35,350
  7882. I promised my kids
  7883.  
  7884. 1723
  7885. 01:11:35,350 --> 01:11:36,950
  7886. I wouldn't do Christmas
  7887. like this!
  7888.  
  7889. 1724
  7890. 01:11:36,950 --> 01:11:39,280
  7891. Everybody loves
  7892. a Christmas like this!
  7893.  
  7894. 1725
  7895. 01:11:39,290 --> 01:11:40,950
  7896. It's fucking spectacular!
  7897.  
  7898. 1726
  7899. 01:11:40,960 --> 01:11:42,720
  7900. No, they don't!
  7901.  
  7902. 1727
  7903. 01:11:43,890 --> 01:11:46,060
  7904. (DRAMATIC MUSIC)
  7905.  
  7906. 1728
  7907. 01:11:53,930 --> 01:11:55,470
  7908. Holy shit.
  7909.  
  7910. 1729
  7911. 01:11:56,700 --> 01:11:59,140
  7912. - I need you to get out.
  7913. - Amy.
  7914.  
  7915. 1730
  7916. 01:11:59,140 --> 01:12:00,470
  7917. I've been putting up
  7918. with your shit
  7919.  
  7920. 1731
  7921. 01:12:00,470 --> 01:12:02,810
  7922. my entire life.
  7923.  
  7924. 1732
  7925. 01:12:02,810 --> 01:12:04,380
  7926. I can't do it anymore.
  7927.  
  7928. 1733
  7929. 01:12:04,380 --> 01:12:06,540
  7930. I just... I can't.
  7931.  
  7932. 1734
  7933. 01:12:06,550 --> 01:12:07,950
  7934. I need you out of my house
  7935.  
  7936. 1735
  7937. 01:12:07,950 --> 01:12:09,950
  7938. and I need you
  7939. out of my life for good.
  7940.  
  7941. 1736
  7942. 01:12:09,950 --> 01:12:13,720
  7943. - You don't mean that.
  7944. - I really, really do.
  7945.  
  7946. 1737
  7947. 01:12:17,130 --> 01:12:19,460
  7948. - Amy, it's Christmas.
  7949. - Mother, get out!
  7950.  
  7951. 1738
  7952. 01:12:23,430 --> 01:12:25,330
  7953. (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
  7954.  
  7955. 1739
  7956. 01:12:43,790 --> 01:12:45,920
  7957. Did you just kick out
  7958. grandma forever?
  7959.  
  7960. 1740
  7961. 01:12:47,460 --> 01:12:49,190
  7962. Guys, how long
  7963. have you been standing here?
  7964.  
  7965. 1741
  7966. 01:12:49,190 --> 01:12:51,020
  7967. How could you do this to us?
  7968.  
  7969. 1742
  7970. 01:12:51,020 --> 01:12:53,360
  7971. Guys, would you please just
  7972. trust me that it's for the best?
  7973.  
  7974. 1743
  7975. 01:12:53,360 --> 01:12:55,990
  7976. No, it's not!
  7977. It's the best for you.
  7978.  
  7979. 1744
  7980. 01:12:56,000 --> 01:12:57,630
  7981. We actually love grandma.
  7982.  
  7983. 1745
  7984. 01:12:57,630 --> 01:13:00,370
  7985. Yeah, she's a part of our
  7986. family, and we love her.
  7987.  
  7988. 1746
  7989. 01:13:00,370 --> 01:13:02,530
  7990. Yo-you don't just
  7991. kick someone out.
  7992.  
  7993. 1747
  7994. 01:13:02,540 --> 01:13:05,670
  7995. First, you kick dad out.
  7996. Now, you kick grandma out.
  7997.  
  7998. 1748
  7999. 01:13:05,670 --> 01:13:07,940
  8000. Who's next?
  8001. Are you gonna kick us out?
  8002.  
  8003. 1749
  8004. 01:13:07,940 --> 01:13:11,110
  8005. What, honey, no, of course not.
  8006. I would never do that.
  8007.  
  8008. 1750
  8009. 01:13:11,110 --> 01:13:13,680
  8010. Why do you always have
  8011. to screw everything up?
  8012.  
  8013. 1751
  8014. 01:13:15,280 --> 01:13:16,780
  8015. Honey...
  8016.  
  8017. 1752
  8018. 01:13:16,780 --> 01:13:17,790
  8019. Nice goin'.
  8020.  
  8021. 1753
  8022. 01:13:19,950 --> 01:13:20,950
  8023. Guys.
  8024.  
  8025. 1754
  8026. 01:13:22,160 --> 01:13:23,160
  8027. Guys...
  8028.  
  8029. 1755
  8030. 01:13:32,200 --> 01:13:34,730
  8031. AMY:
  8032. So that's how it happened.
  8033.  
  8034. 1756
  8035. 01:13:34,740 --> 01:13:37,870
  8036. That's how I ruined Christmas.
  8037.  
  8038. 1757
  8039. 01:13:37,870 --> 01:13:39,970
  8040. I got so wrapped up
  8041. in fighting with my mom
  8042.  
  8043. 1758
  8044. 01:13:39,970 --> 01:13:41,640
  8045. that I lost sight
  8046. of the only thing
  8047.  
  8048. 1759
  8049. 01:13:41,640 --> 01:13:44,180
  8050. that actually matters.
  8051.  
  8052. 1760
  8053. 01:13:44,180 --> 01:13:46,080
  8054. I lost sight of my kids.
  8055.  
  8056. 1761
  8057. 01:13:47,080 --> 01:13:49,550
  8058. And what's worse is...
  8059.  
  8060. 1762
  8061. 01:13:49,550 --> 01:13:51,820
  8062. I didn't just ruin Christmas.
  8063.  
  8064. 1763
  8065. 01:13:51,820 --> 01:13:54,490
  8066. I ruined my family.
  8067.  
  8068. 1764
  8069. 01:13:54,490 --> 01:13:56,390
  8070. (THE LUMINEERS SINGING
  8071. "SLEEP ON THE FLOOR")
  8072.  
  8073. 1765
  8074. 01:13:56,390 --> 01:14:00,430
  8075. ♪ Forget what
  8076. Father Brennan said ♪
  8077.  
  8078. 1766
  8079. 01:14:00,430 --> 01:14:03,900
  8080. ♪ We were not born in sin ♪
  8081.  
  8082. 1767
  8083. 01:14:03,900 --> 01:14:07,600
  8084. ♪ Leave a note on your bed ♪
  8085.  
  8086. 1768
  8087. 01:14:07,600 --> 01:14:09,440
  8088. Mom?
  8089.  
  8090. 1769
  8091. 01:14:09,440 --> 01:14:11,240
  8092. It's Christmas Eve.
  8093.  
  8094. 1770
  8095. 01:14:11,240 --> 01:14:13,170
  8096. Where do you wanna get takeout?
  8097.  
  8098. 1771
  8099. 01:14:15,580 --> 01:14:18,380
  8100. Mom? Mom?
  8101.  
  8102. 1772
  8103. 01:14:20,780 --> 01:14:22,720
  8104. (MUSIC CONTINUES)
  8105.  
  8106. 1773
  8107. 01:14:35,560 --> 01:14:39,270
  8108. ♪ Pack yourself
  8109. a toothbrush dear ♪
  8110.  
  8111. 1774
  8112. 01:14:39,270 --> 01:14:42,640
  8113. ♪ Pack yourself
  8114. a favorite blouse ♪
  8115.  
  8116. 1775
  8117. 01:14:42,640 --> 01:14:46,400
  8118. ♪ Take a withdrawal slip ♪
  8119.  
  8120. 1776
  8121. 01:14:46,410 --> 01:14:49,710
  8122. ♪ Take all
  8123. of your savings out ♪
  8124.  
  8125. 1777
  8126. 01:14:49,710 --> 01:14:53,450
  8127. ♪ 'Cause if we don't
  8128. leave this town ♪
  8129.  
  8130. 1778
  8131. 01:14:53,450 --> 01:14:56,790
  8132. ♪ We might never make it out ♪
  8133.  
  8134. 1779
  8135. 01:15:04,390 --> 01:15:06,290
  8136. (MUSIC CONTINUES)
  8137.  
  8138. 1780
  8139. 01:15:11,470 --> 01:15:15,570
  8140. ♪ Forget what
  8141. Father Brennan said ♪
  8142.  
  8143. 1781
  8144. 01:15:15,570 --> 01:15:19,070
  8145. ♪ We were not born in sin ♪
  8146.  
  8147. 1782
  8148. 01:15:19,070 --> 01:15:22,570
  8149. ♪ Leave a note on your bed ♪
  8150.  
  8151. 1783
  8152. 01:15:22,580 --> 01:15:26,150
  8153. ♪ Let your mother know
  8154. you're safe ♪
  8155.  
  8156. 1784
  8157. 01:15:26,150 --> 01:15:29,520
  8158. ♪ And by the time she wakes ♪
  8159.  
  8160. 1785
  8161. 01:15:29,520 --> 01:15:33,190
  8162. ♪ We'll have driven
  8163. through the state ♪
  8164.  
  8165. 1786
  8166. 01:15:33,190 --> 01:15:36,420
  8167. ♪ We'll have driven
  8168. through the night ♪
  8169.  
  8170. 1787
  8171. 01:15:36,420 --> 01:15:38,620
  8172. ♪ Baby come on ♪
  8173.  
  8174. 1788
  8175. 01:15:38,630 --> 01:15:39,630
  8176. Hey.
  8177.  
  8178. 1789
  8179. 01:15:40,830 --> 01:15:43,330
  8180. Oh, hello.
  8181.  
  8182. 1790
  8183. 01:15:43,330 --> 01:15:47,100
  8184. Thank you again for
  8185. inviting me to your church.
  8186.  
  8187. 1791
  8188. 01:15:47,100 --> 01:15:49,170
  8189. I really didn't.
  8190.  
  8191. 1792
  8192. 01:15:49,170 --> 01:15:55,170
  8193. ♪ Sleep in heavenly peace ♪♪
  8194.  
  8195. 1793
  8196. 01:15:55,180 --> 01:15:56,840
  8197. What's up, bitches?
  8198.  
  8199. 1794
  8200. 01:15:56,840 --> 01:15:59,010
  8201. Oh, my gosh, it's Isis.
  8202.  
  8203. 1795
  8204. 01:15:59,010 --> 01:16:00,450
  8205. Isis is here.
  8206.  
  8207. 1796
  8208. 01:16:00,450 --> 01:16:03,050
  8209. - Hi, Isis.
  8210. - Hey.
  8211.  
  8212. 1797
  8213. 01:16:03,050 --> 01:16:04,680
  8214. Well, I must say,
  8215. I didn't expect you
  8216.  
  8217. 1798
  8218. 01:16:04,680 --> 01:16:06,650
  8219. to be the church-going type.
  8220.  
  8221. 1799
  8222. 01:16:06,650 --> 01:16:09,990
  8223. Well, I'm,
  8224. I'm workin' out some shit.
  8225.  
  8226. 1800
  8227. 01:16:09,990 --> 01:16:11,890
  8228. Plus, all the bars are closed.
  8229.  
  8230. 1801
  8231. 01:16:14,660 --> 01:16:17,400
  8232. (SIGHS)
  8233. Oh, you guys.
  8234.  
  8235. 1802
  8236. 01:16:17,400 --> 01:16:20,740
  8237. I could really use some
  8238. churchin' tonight.
  8239.  
  8240. 1803
  8241. 01:16:22,570 --> 01:16:24,500
  8242. You know what I mean?
  8243.  
  8244. 1804
  8245. 01:16:24,510 --> 01:16:26,400
  8246. - No.
  8247. - Nope?
  8248.  
  8249. 1805
  8250. 01:16:26,410 --> 01:16:30,410
  8251. Well, today my daughter told me
  8252. she needed "More space."
  8253.  
  8254. 1806
  8255. 01:16:30,410 --> 01:16:32,380
  8256. I don't even know
  8257. what that's supposed to mean.
  8258.  
  8259. 1807
  8260. 01:16:32,380 --> 01:16:34,010
  8261. Yeah, well,
  8262. my daughter just kicked me
  8263.  
  8264. 1808
  8265. 01:16:34,010 --> 01:16:35,410
  8266. out of her life forever.
  8267.  
  8268. 1809
  8269. 01:16:35,420 --> 01:16:36,480
  8270. (GASPS)
  8271.  
  8272. 1810
  8273. 01:16:36,480 --> 01:16:38,220
  8274. Why?
  8275.  
  8276. 1811
  8277. 01:16:38,220 --> 01:16:39,920
  8278. Because I push her
  8279. to be the best
  8280.  
  8281. 1812
  8282. 01:16:39,920 --> 01:16:42,020
  8283. and she can't handle it.
  8284.  
  8285. 1813
  8286. 01:16:42,020 --> 01:16:43,760
  8287. Of course, my mother
  8288. pushed me twice as hard
  8289.  
  8290. 1814
  8291. 01:16:43,760 --> 01:16:45,890
  8292. and I turned out amazing.
  8293.  
  8294. 1815
  8295. 01:16:45,890 --> 01:16:50,330
  8296. But I guess not everyone
  8297. is as incredibly strong as I am.
  8298.  
  8299. 1816
  8300. 01:16:50,330 --> 01:16:53,330
  8301. Well, my daughter didn't kick me
  8302. out of the house or anything.
  8303.  
  8304. 1817
  8305. 01:16:53,330 --> 01:16:55,500
  8306. But you would not believe
  8307. how mad she got
  8308.  
  8309. 1818
  8310. 01:16:55,500 --> 01:16:57,540
  8311. when I told her I bought
  8312. the house next to hers.
  8313.  
  8314. 1819
  8315. 01:16:57,540 --> 01:17:00,170
  8316. What? You bought the house
  8317. next to your daughter?
  8318.  
  8319. 1820
  8320. 01:17:00,170 --> 01:17:03,040
  8321. - Yeah, I did.
  8322. - Did you ask her first?
  8323.  
  8324. 1821
  8325. 01:17:03,040 --> 01:17:05,740
  8326. No, I wanted it
  8327. to be a surprise.
  8328.  
  8329. 1822
  8330. 01:17:05,750 --> 01:17:07,880
  8331. Yeah, that might be a bit much.
  8332.  
  8333. 1823
  8334. 01:17:07,880 --> 01:17:10,550
  8335. Dude, that is fucking psycho.
  8336.  
  8337. 1824
  8338. 01:17:10,550 --> 01:17:12,220
  8339. Well, at least
  8340. I love my daughter.
  8341.  
  8342. 1825
  8343. 01:17:12,220 --> 01:17:14,550
  8344. You only visit Carla
  8345. when you need money.
  8346.  
  8347. 1826
  8348. 01:17:14,550 --> 01:17:15,690
  8349. Uh, no, that is not true.
  8350.  
  8351. 1827
  8352. 01:17:15,690 --> 01:17:17,220
  8353. I visit her on other occasions
  8354.  
  8355. 1828
  8356. 01:17:17,220 --> 01:17:20,090
  8357. like when I'm hiding
  8358. from someone.
  8359.  
  8360. 1829
  8361. 01:17:20,090 --> 01:17:22,030
  8362. Oh, just admit it, Isis.
  8363.  
  8364. 1830
  8365. 01:17:22,030 --> 01:17:23,560
  8366. You're a degenerate gambler
  8367.  
  8368. 1831
  8369. 01:17:23,560 --> 01:17:24,860
  8370. with a third-grade education
  8371.  
  8372. 1832
  8373. 01:17:24,870 --> 01:17:26,030
  8374. and a cheap weave.
  8375.  
  8376. 1833
  8377. 01:17:26,030 --> 01:17:28,370
  8378. This is my own hair, okay?
  8379.  
  8380. 1834
  8381. 01:17:28,370 --> 01:17:29,900
  8382. And you're a terrible mother.
  8383.  
  8384. 1835
  8385. 01:17:29,900 --> 01:17:33,040
  8386. - Ladies, it is Jesus' birthday.
  8387. - No, I'm serious.
  8388.  
  8389. 1836
  8390. 01:17:33,040 --> 01:17:35,140
  8391. You think that
  8392. you are so perfect.
  8393.  
  8394. 1837
  8395. 01:17:35,140 --> 01:17:37,710
  8396. But you are the worst mom
  8397. of all of us.
  8398.  
  8399. 1838
  8400. 01:17:37,710 --> 01:17:39,540
  8401. - Well, I don't know...
  8402. - Okay, okay.
  8403.  
  8404. 1839
  8405. 01:17:39,550 --> 01:17:41,550
  8406. Second worst, whatever.
  8407. But the point is
  8408.  
  8409. 1840
  8410. 01:17:41,550 --> 01:17:45,720
  8411. that you're one of those moms
  8412. that you, you dress so perfectly
  8413.  
  8414. 1841
  8415. 01:17:45,720 --> 01:17:49,590
  8416. and you give fancy parties,
  8417. and you know how to cook food.
  8418.  
  8419. 1842
  8420. 01:17:49,590 --> 01:17:51,760
  8421. And, and you have
  8422. all your own teeth.
  8423.  
  8424. 1843
  8425. 01:17:51,760 --> 01:17:53,090
  8426. But you know what? You suck.
  8427.  
  8428. 1844
  8429. 01:17:53,090 --> 01:17:55,760
  8430. You suck at all the shit
  8431. that really matters.
  8432.  
  8433. 1845
  8434. 01:17:55,760 --> 01:17:58,330
  8435. And I even can see it,
  8436. and I'm stoned all the time.
  8437.  
  8438. 1846
  8439. 01:17:58,330 --> 01:17:59,730
  8440. Please, you don't know
  8441. the first thing about me.
  8442.  
  8443. 1847
  8444. 01:17:59,730 --> 01:18:01,070
  8445. Well, if you're
  8446. such an awesome mom
  8447.  
  8448. 1848
  8449. 01:18:01,070 --> 01:18:02,270
  8450. why did your daughter
  8451. kick you out
  8452.  
  8453. 1849
  8454. 01:18:02,270 --> 01:18:03,570
  8455. of her life forever?
  8456.  
  8457. 1850
  8458. 01:18:03,570 --> 01:18:05,270
  8459. In your face.
  8460.  
  8461. 1851
  8462. 01:18:05,270 --> 01:18:06,640
  8463. And you know what,
  8464. I have done horrible stuff
  8465.  
  8466. 1852
  8467. 01:18:06,640 --> 01:18:08,610
  8468. to my daughter,
  8469. really horrible shit.
  8470.  
  8471. 1853
  8472. 01:18:08,610 --> 01:18:11,810
  8473. And she has never
  8474. kicked me out. Never.
  8475.  
  8476. 1854
  8477. 01:18:11,810 --> 01:18:14,450
  8478. So you just take that
  8479. and you roll it up real tight
  8480.  
  8481. 1855
  8482. 01:18:14,450 --> 01:18:17,420
  8483. and you shove it up your ass.
  8484.  
  8485. 1856
  8486. 01:18:17,420 --> 01:18:19,920
  8487. Okay.
  8488.  
  8489. 1857
  8490. 01:18:19,920 --> 01:18:24,120
  8491. We've all shared some very
  8492. powerful feelings tonight.
  8493.  
  8494. 1858
  8495. 01:18:24,130 --> 01:18:25,490
  8496. Oh, shut the fuck up, Sandy.
  8497.  
  8498. 1859
  8499. 01:18:25,490 --> 01:18:26,490
  8500. You bet.
  8501.  
  8502. 1860
  8503. 01:18:28,000 --> 01:18:29,930
  8504. (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
  8505.  
  8506. 1861
  8507. 01:18:38,770 --> 01:18:40,210
  8508. (DOOR OPENS)
  8509.  
  8510. 1862
  8511. 01:18:43,680 --> 01:18:45,940
  8512. - Hey.
  8513. - Hey.
  8514.  
  8515. 1863
  8516. 01:18:45,950 --> 01:18:48,280
  8517. Well, I heard what happened.
  8518.  
  8519. 1864
  8520. 01:18:48,280 --> 01:18:49,550
  8521. Hmm.
  8522.  
  8523. 1865
  8524. 01:18:51,380 --> 01:18:52,720
  8525. You doin' okay?
  8526.  
  8527. 1866
  8528. 01:18:55,120 --> 01:18:56,460
  8529. I don't know.
  8530.  
  8531. 1867
  8532. 01:18:59,530 --> 01:19:00,960
  8533. Can I ask you something?
  8534.  
  8535. 1868
  8536. 01:19:00,960 --> 01:19:02,360
  8537. Sure.
  8538.  
  8539. 1869
  8540. 01:19:02,360 --> 01:19:04,400
  8541. How do you take it?
  8542.  
  8543. 1870
  8544. 01:19:04,400 --> 01:19:05,530
  8545. Take what?
  8546.  
  8547. 1871
  8548. 01:19:05,530 --> 01:19:07,130
  8549. Living with mom.
  8550.  
  8551. 1872
  8552. 01:19:07,130 --> 01:19:08,970
  8553. I mean, s-s-she's so bossy
  8554.  
  8555. 1873
  8556. 01:19:08,970 --> 01:19:10,400
  8557. and controlling and...
  8558.  
  8559. 1874
  8560. 01:19:10,400 --> 01:19:12,470
  8561. Oh, my God, she's so vain.
  8562.  
  8563. 1875
  8564. 01:19:12,470 --> 01:19:14,840
  8565. I mean, she spends all her time
  8566.  
  8567. 1876
  8568. 01:19:14,840 --> 01:19:17,380
  8569. you know, creating this,
  8570. this perfect image of herself
  8571.  
  8572. 1877
  8573. 01:19:17,380 --> 01:19:19,140
  8574. just so she can
  8575. lord it over people.
  8576.  
  8577. 1878
  8578. 01:19:19,150 --> 01:19:21,650
  8579. Sweetie, your mom isn't vain.
  8580.  
  8581. 1879
  8582. 01:19:21,650 --> 01:19:23,850
  8583. Oh, come on, she, she wears
  8584.  
  8585. 1880
  8586. 01:19:23,850 --> 01:19:26,920
  8587. a princess outfit
  8588. at least once a month.
  8589.  
  8590. 1881
  8591. 01:19:26,920 --> 01:19:28,650
  8592. You're probably
  8593. never gonna believe this.
  8594.  
  8595. 1882
  8596. 01:19:28,660 --> 01:19:30,990
  8597. But your mom is the most
  8598. insecure woman I've ever met.
  8599.  
  8600. 1883
  8601. 01:19:32,060 --> 01:19:33,930
  8602. My mother?
  8603.  
  8604. 1884
  8605. 01:19:33,930 --> 01:19:36,160
  8606. - Ruth?
  8607. - Yes.
  8608.  
  8609. 1885
  8610. 01:19:36,160 --> 01:19:39,200
  8611. - Redmond? Huh.
  8612. - Yes.
  8613.  
  8614. 1886
  8615. 01:19:39,200 --> 01:19:41,000
  8616. She never shows
  8617. anyone except for me.
  8618.  
  8619. 1887
  8620. 01:19:41,000 --> 01:19:45,200
  8621. But beneath that tough exterior
  8622. is a scared little girl
  8623.  
  8624. 1888
  8625. 01:19:45,210 --> 01:19:46,940
  8626. whose mom
  8627. never really loved her.
  8628.  
  8629. 1889
  8630. 01:19:46,940 --> 01:19:48,570
  8631. Oh, come on, dad.
  8632.  
  8633. 1890
  8634. 01:19:48,580 --> 01:19:50,580
  8635. You know her mother.
  8636.  
  8637. 1891
  8638. 01:19:50,580 --> 01:19:52,010
  8639. Nothing your mom does
  8640.  
  8641. 1892
  8642. 01:19:52,010 --> 01:19:53,450
  8643. is ever good enough
  8644. for that woman.
  8645.  
  8646. 1893
  8647. 01:19:53,450 --> 01:19:55,580
  8648. She makes your mom
  8649. feel worthless
  8650.  
  8651. 1894
  8652. 01:19:55,580 --> 01:19:57,780
  8653. every single day
  8654. of her life.
  8655.  
  8656. 1895
  8657. 01:19:57,790 --> 01:19:59,780
  8658. So that's why it's
  8659. so important to your mom
  8660.  
  8661. 1896
  8662. 01:19:59,790 --> 01:20:01,720
  8663. to make everything perfect.
  8664.  
  8665. 1897
  8666. 01:20:01,720 --> 01:20:03,190
  8667. It's not because she's vain.
  8668.  
  8669. 1898
  8670. 01:20:03,190 --> 01:20:05,220
  8671. It's, it's, it's...
  8672. You know, it's because
  8673.  
  8674. 1899
  8675. 01:20:05,230 --> 01:20:07,460
  8676. when someone tells her
  8677. she's got the most amazing
  8678.  
  8679. 1900
  8680. 01:20:07,460 --> 01:20:10,400
  8681. Christmas tree on the block, it
  8682. makes her feel just for a second
  8683.  
  8684. 1901
  8685. 01:20:10,400 --> 01:20:12,130
  8686. like she's not worthless.
  8687.  
  8688. 1902
  8689. 01:20:12,130 --> 01:20:15,570
  8690. Like she's, she's actually
  8691. good at something.
  8692.  
  8693. 1903
  8694. 01:20:15,570 --> 01:20:17,970
  8695. Like she's, like she's loved.
  8696.  
  8697. 1904
  8698. 01:20:17,970 --> 01:20:19,900
  8699. Why does she take it
  8700. out on me then?
  8701.  
  8702. 1905
  8703. 01:20:19,910 --> 01:20:22,270
  8704. Because you know what
  8705. she's most insecure about?
  8706.  
  8707. 1906
  8708. 01:20:22,280 --> 01:20:23,980
  8709. Mm...
  8710.  
  8711. 1907
  8712. 01:20:23,980 --> 01:20:25,310
  8713. Bein' a mom.
  8714.  
  8715. 1908
  8716. 01:20:28,080 --> 01:20:31,750
  8717. I-I can't tell you the number
  8718. of times she said to me...
  8719.  
  8720. 1909
  8721. 01:20:31,750 --> 01:20:34,720
  8722. "Did I do a good job
  8723. raising Amy?
  8724.  
  8725. 1910
  8726. 01:20:34,720 --> 01:20:37,260
  8727. Am I good mother?
  8728. Did I screw everything up?"
  8729.  
  8730. 1911
  8731. 01:20:38,260 --> 01:20:39,490
  8732. She really asked that?
  8733.  
  8734. 1912
  8735. 01:20:39,490 --> 01:20:41,160
  8736. Sweetheart, she loves you
  8737.  
  8738. 1913
  8739. 01:20:41,160 --> 01:20:42,760
  8740. more than anything in the world.
  8741.  
  8742. 1914
  8743. 01:20:42,760 --> 01:20:45,630
  8744. She's just got a...
  8745.  
  8746. 1915
  8747. 01:20:45,630 --> 01:20:47,430
  8748. a deeply fucked up way
  8749. of showing it.
  8750.  
  8751. 1916
  8752. 01:20:47,430 --> 01:20:49,100
  8753. Yeah.
  8754.  
  8755. 1917
  8756. 01:20:49,100 --> 01:20:52,500
  8757. Look, I've been married
  8758. to your mother for 36 years.
  8759.  
  8760. 1918
  8761. 01:20:52,510 --> 01:20:53,940
  8762. Hm.
  8763.  
  8764. 1919
  8765. 01:20:53,940 --> 01:20:56,980
  8766. And she is a pain in the ass
  8767. even on a good day.
  8768.  
  8769. 1920
  8770. 01:20:56,980 --> 01:20:58,680
  8771. But you know what?
  8772.  
  8773. 1921
  8774. 01:20:58,680 --> 01:21:01,150
  8775. I love her more now than I did
  8776. the day we got married.
  8777.  
  8778. 1922
  8779. 01:21:01,150 --> 01:21:04,120
  8780. Because I know the real her.
  8781.  
  8782. 1923
  8783. 01:21:04,120 --> 01:21:08,120
  8784. And if you can find it
  8785. in your heart to forgive her
  8786.  
  8787. 1924
  8788. 01:21:08,120 --> 01:21:10,520
  8789. and get to know her
  8790. like I know her...
  8791.  
  8792. 1925
  8793. 01:21:10,520 --> 01:21:15,190
  8794. you might just find
  8795. that there is a funny
  8796.  
  8797. 1926
  8798. 01:21:15,200 --> 01:21:19,170
  8799. sweet, beautiful person
  8800. hiding inside there.
  8801.  
  8802. 1927
  8803. 01:21:20,430 --> 01:21:22,200
  8804. Did you say "Sweet?"
  8805.  
  8806. 1928
  8807. 01:21:22,200 --> 01:21:26,540
  8808. Okay, a funny, beautiful person
  8809. hiding in there.
  8810.  
  8811. 1929
  8812. 01:21:30,010 --> 01:21:31,010
  8813. Yeah.
  8814.  
  8815. 1930
  8816. 01:21:32,880 --> 01:21:33,880
  8817. Yeah.
  8818.  
  8819. 1931
  8820. 01:21:35,850 --> 01:21:37,480
  8821. You know where she is?
  8822.  
  8823. 1932
  8824. 01:21:37,480 --> 01:21:39,150
  8825. It's Christmas Eve.
  8826.  
  8827. 1933
  8828. 01:21:39,150 --> 01:21:41,950
  8829. (UPBEAT MUSIC)
  8830.  
  8831. 1934
  8832. 01:21:41,960 --> 01:21:43,860
  8833. (TIRES SCREECHING)
  8834.  
  8835. 1935
  8836. 01:21:46,030 --> 01:21:47,530
  8837. (TIRES SCREECHING)
  8838.  
  8839. 1936
  8840. 01:21:58,740 --> 01:22:03,040
  8841. ♪ And the mountains in reply ♪
  8842.  
  8843. 1937
  8844. 01:22:03,040 --> 01:22:06,850
  8845. ♪ Echoing their
  8846. joyous strains ♪
  8847.  
  8848. 1938
  8849. 01:22:06,850 --> 01:22:13,350
  8850. ♪ Glo-o-o-ria ♪
  8851.  
  8852. 1939
  8853. 01:22:14,320 --> 01:22:15,820
  8854. Excuse me, I'm so sorry.
  8855.  
  8856. 1940
  8857. 01:22:15,820 --> 01:22:18,760
  8858. ♪ In excelsis Deo ♪
  8859.  
  8860. 1941
  8861. 01:22:18,760 --> 01:22:21,860
  8862. ♪ Gl-o-o-oria ♪
  8863.  
  8864. 1942
  8865. 01:22:21,860 --> 01:22:23,730
  8866. Hey, mom.
  8867.  
  8868. 1943
  8869. 01:22:23,730 --> 01:22:24,730
  8870. Hi.
  8871.  
  8872. 1944
  8873. 01:22:26,370 --> 01:22:28,570
  8874. - Hi.
  8875. - Hi, I'm Sandy.
  8876.  
  8877. 1945
  8878. 01:22:28,570 --> 01:22:30,100
  8879. - I'm Kiki's mom.
  8880. - Yes, I know.
  8881.  
  8882. 1946
  8883. 01:22:30,100 --> 01:22:32,070
  8884. - Nice to see you again.
  8885. - How you doin'?
  8886.  
  8887. 1947
  8888. 01:22:32,070 --> 01:22:33,400
  8889. Hey, wow, look at that.
  8890.  
  8891. 1948
  8892. 01:22:33,410 --> 01:22:36,410
  8893. All of you are here. Okay.
  8894.  
  8895. 1949
  8896. 01:22:36,410 --> 01:22:38,540
  8897. And what are you
  8898. doing here, Amy?
  8899.  
  8900. 1950
  8901. 01:22:38,550 --> 01:22:40,540
  8902. I, um...
  8903.  
  8904. 1951
  8905. 01:22:40,550 --> 01:22:42,280
  8906. I actually came to apologize
  8907.  
  8908. 1952
  8909. 01:22:42,280 --> 01:22:44,220
  8910. for kicking you out
  8911. of the house.
  8912.  
  8913. 1953
  8914. 01:22:46,690 --> 01:22:49,290
  8915. You're my mom,
  8916. and that was a little harsh.
  8917.  
  8918. 1954
  8919. 01:22:49,290 --> 01:22:50,860
  8920. It certainly was.
  8921.  
  8922. 1955
  8923. 01:22:52,360 --> 01:22:53,360
  8924. Yeah.
  8925.  
  8926. 1956
  8927. 01:22:54,800 --> 01:22:56,030
  8928. Okay.
  8929.  
  8930. 1957
  8931. 01:22:56,030 --> 01:22:57,360
  8932. Hey, psycho bitch
  8933.  
  8934. 1958
  8935. 01:22:57,360 --> 01:22:58,900
  8936. your daughter just
  8937. apologized to you.
  8938.  
  8939. 1959
  8940. 01:22:58,900 --> 01:23:01,600
  8941. You're now supposed to say
  8942. "I'm sorry" to her.
  8943.  
  8944. 1960
  8945. 01:23:01,600 --> 01:23:03,640
  8946. That's the way human beings
  8947. talk to each other.
  8948.  
  8949. 1961
  8950. 01:23:03,640 --> 01:23:04,640
  8951. Yeah.
  8952.  
  8953. 1962
  8954. 01:23:09,710 --> 01:23:12,450
  8955. I'm also basically sorry.
  8956.  
  8957. 1963
  8958. 01:23:15,250 --> 01:23:17,480
  8959. Okay, good. That was good.
  8960.  
  8961. 1964
  8962. 01:23:17,480 --> 01:23:19,420
  8963. Now, tell her
  8964. what you're sorry for.
  8965.  
  8966. 1965
  8967. 01:23:21,390 --> 01:23:22,720
  8968. (WHISPERING)
  8969. You got this.
  8970.  
  8971. 1966
  8972. 01:23:24,120 --> 01:23:26,260
  8973. (CLEARS THROAT)
  8974.  
  8975. 1967
  8976. 01:23:26,260 --> 01:23:27,960
  8977. It is possible
  8978. that I should not
  8979.  
  8980. 1968
  8981. 01:23:27,960 --> 01:23:31,560
  8982. have thrown a secret
  8983. Christmas party at your house.
  8984.  
  8985. 1969
  8986. 01:23:31,560 --> 01:23:33,770
  8987. Obviously, you made
  8988. an incredible number
  8989.  
  8990. 1970
  8991. 01:23:33,770 --> 01:23:36,740
  8992. of bad decisions
  8993. this Christmas as well.
  8994.  
  8995. 1971
  8996. 01:23:36,740 --> 01:23:42,270
  8997. But... for the tiny fraction
  8998. of blame that falls on me
  8999.  
  9000. 1972
  9001. 01:23:42,280 --> 01:23:47,850
  9002. I am... I am
  9003. generally... apologetic.
  9004.  
  9005. 1973
  9006. 01:23:50,120 --> 01:23:51,820
  9007. Okay.
  9008.  
  9009. 1974
  9010. 01:23:51,820 --> 01:23:53,950
  9011. Thank you.
  9012.  
  9013. 1975
  9014. 01:23:53,950 --> 01:23:55,820
  9015. Mom, I know that that was
  9016.  
  9017. 1976
  9018. 01:23:55,820 --> 01:23:57,520
  9019. really, really hard
  9020. for you to say.
  9021.  
  9022. 1977
  9023. 01:23:57,520 --> 01:23:59,460
  9024. I-it actually really was.
  9025.  
  9026. 1978
  9027. 01:24:03,000 --> 01:24:05,360
  9028. And, um... you know what?
  9029.  
  9030. 1979
  9031. 01:24:05,370 --> 01:24:07,330
  9032. I just, I want you
  9033. to know that I finally
  9034.  
  9035. 1980
  9036. 01:24:07,330 --> 01:24:09,270
  9037. understand why you're like this.
  9038.  
  9039. 1981
  9040. 01:24:11,870 --> 01:24:16,780
  9041. And I need you to know...
  9042. that I love you.
  9043.  
  9044. 1982
  9045. 01:24:19,450 --> 01:24:21,350
  9046. What's that supposed to mean?
  9047.  
  9048. 1983
  9049. 01:24:24,620 --> 01:24:27,160
  9050. I don't think
  9051. that you're worthless.
  9052.  
  9053. 1984
  9054. 01:24:29,490 --> 01:24:31,890
  9055. I think you're fucking amazing.
  9056.  
  9057. 1985
  9058. 01:24:31,890 --> 01:24:33,230
  9059. Why are you saying this?
  9060.  
  9061. 1986
  9062. 01:24:33,230 --> 01:24:35,160
  9063. And no matter
  9064. what anyone says...
  9065.  
  9066. 1987
  9067. 01:24:37,330 --> 01:24:39,470
  9068. I think you're a great mom.
  9069.  
  9070. 1988
  9071. 01:24:43,500 --> 01:24:45,000
  9072. Really?
  9073.  
  9074. 1989
  9075. 01:24:45,010 --> 01:24:46,010
  9076. Yeah.
  9077.  
  9078. 1990
  9079. 01:24:47,410 --> 01:24:49,340
  9080. Yeah, I loved my childhood.
  9081.  
  9082. 1991
  9083. 01:24:50,810 --> 01:24:53,150
  9084. I did. You gave me everything
  9085. that I needed.
  9086.  
  9087. 1992
  9088. 01:24:54,850 --> 01:24:57,190
  9089. And you always pushed me
  9090. to do better.
  9091.  
  9092. 1993
  9093. 01:24:59,190 --> 01:25:01,150
  9094. And were you perfect?
  9095.  
  9096. 1994
  9097. 01:25:01,160 --> 01:25:03,150
  9098. - Yes.
  9099. - No.
  9100.  
  9101. 1995
  9102. 01:25:03,160 --> 01:25:04,920
  9103. (CHUCKLES)
  9104.  
  9105. 1996
  9106. 01:25:04,920 --> 01:25:08,090
  9107. But none of us are.
  9108.  
  9109. 1997
  9110. 01:25:08,090 --> 01:25:10,260
  9111. So, I just...
  9112.  
  9113. 1998
  9114. 01:25:10,260 --> 01:25:16,170
  9115. I really want you
  9116. to know... that you did great.
  9117.  
  9118. 1999
  9119. 01:25:18,540 --> 01:25:22,670
  9120. That's the nicest thing that
  9121. anyone has ever said to me.
  9122.  
  9123. 2000
  9124. 01:25:22,680 --> 01:25:24,340
  9125. I mean, I...
  9126.  
  9127. 2001
  9128. 01:25:24,340 --> 01:25:27,850
  9129. I actually think that
  9130. you're a really wonderful mom.
  9131.  
  9132. 2002
  9133. 01:25:27,850 --> 01:25:29,550
  9134. I mean, your kids are so happy.
  9135.  
  9136. 2003
  9137. 01:25:29,550 --> 01:25:32,290
  9138. They're so sweet
  9139. and they love you so much.
  9140.  
  9141. 2004
  9142. 01:25:35,350 --> 01:25:37,690
  9143. - Thank you.
  9144. - I mean, I wish...
  9145.  
  9146. 2005
  9147. 01:25:40,230 --> 01:25:43,900
  9148. I wish I was as close to you
  9149. as you are to your kids.
  9150.  
  9151. 2006
  9152. 01:25:46,730 --> 01:25:48,640
  9153. We still can, mom.
  9154.  
  9155. 2007
  9156. 01:25:52,240 --> 01:25:55,070
  9157. Wow, I'm just not
  9158. very good at this, Amy.
  9159.  
  9160. 2008
  9161. 01:25:55,080 --> 01:25:57,810
  9162. But I just love you so much.
  9163.  
  9164. 2009
  9165. 01:25:58,880 --> 01:26:02,450
  9166. I love you so much. I do.
  9167.  
  9168. 2010
  9169. 01:26:06,420 --> 01:26:08,590
  9170. - God.
  9171. - Oh, my God.
  9172.  
  9173. 2011
  9174. 01:26:08,590 --> 01:26:10,820
  9175. You're a train wreck.
  9176.  
  9177. 2012
  9178. 01:26:10,820 --> 01:26:13,730
  9179. Well, it's a very complicated
  9180.  
  9181. 2013
  9182. 01:26:13,730 --> 01:26:15,960
  9183. relationship between
  9184. a mother and a daughter.
  9185.  
  9186. 2014
  9187. 01:26:15,960 --> 01:26:18,130
  9188. But these two...
  9189.  
  9190. 2015
  9191. 01:26:18,130 --> 01:26:19,400
  9192. They've got it together.
  9193.  
  9194. 2016
  9195. 01:26:19,400 --> 01:26:20,800
  9196. - I know. I know, babe.
  9197. - Finally.
  9198.  
  9199. 2017
  9200. 01:26:20,800 --> 01:26:22,630
  9201. Yeah. Okay. Here.
  9202.  
  9203. 2018
  9204. 01:26:22,640 --> 01:26:25,170
  9205. - Do you want some this?
  9206. - Yes.
  9207.  
  9208. 2019
  9209. 01:26:25,170 --> 01:26:27,770
  9210. It's okay. It's okay.
  9211.  
  9212. 2020
  9213. 01:26:27,770 --> 01:26:28,940
  9214. It's okay.
  9215.  
  9216. 2021
  9217. 01:26:28,940 --> 01:26:30,340
  9218. Okay, mom?
  9219.  
  9220. 2022
  9221. 01:26:30,340 --> 01:26:31,940
  9222. (BELL TOLLING)
  9223.  
  9224. 2023
  9225. 01:26:31,950 --> 01:26:33,280
  9226. Mom, is it midnight already?
  9227.  
  9228. 2024
  9229. 01:26:33,280 --> 01:26:34,280
  9230. Well, yeah.
  9231.  
  9232. 2025
  9233. 01:26:35,820 --> 01:26:37,620
  9234. We gotta save Christmas.
  9235.  
  9236. 2026
  9237. 01:26:37,620 --> 01:26:39,650
  9238. Oh, my God. I've been waiting
  9239. my whole life for this.
  9240.  
  9241. 2027
  9242. 01:26:39,650 --> 01:26:42,520
  9243. (GWEN STEFANI SINGING
  9244. "JINGLE BELLS")
  9245.  
  9246. 2028
  9247. 01:26:42,520 --> 01:26:44,920
  9248. ♪ Dashing through the snow ♪
  9249.  
  9250. 2029
  9251. 01:26:44,920 --> 01:26:48,030
  9252. ♪ In a one-horse open sleigh ♪
  9253.  
  9254. 2030
  9255. 01:26:48,030 --> 01:26:50,700
  9256. ♪ O'er the fields we go ♪
  9257.  
  9258. 2031
  9259. 01:26:50,700 --> 01:26:53,360
  9260. - ♪ Laughing all the way ♪
  9261. - ♪ Laughing all the way ♪
  9262.  
  9263. 2032
  9264. 01:26:53,370 --> 01:26:56,000
  9265. ♪ Bells on bobtails ring ♪
  9266.  
  9267. 2033
  9268. 01:26:56,000 --> 01:26:58,370
  9269. ♪ Making spirits bright ♪
  9270.  
  9271. 2034
  9272. 01:26:58,370 --> 01:27:01,310
  9273. ♪ What fun it is
  9274. to laugh and sing ♪
  9275.  
  9276. 2035
  9277. 01:27:01,310 --> 01:27:03,640
  9278. ♪ A sleighing song tonight ♪
  9279.  
  9280. 2036
  9281. 01:27:03,640 --> 01:27:06,980
  9282. ♪ Whoa jingle bells
  9283. jingle bells ♪
  9284.  
  9285. 2037
  9286. 01:27:06,980 --> 01:27:09,780
  9287. - ♪ Jingle all the way ♪
  9288. - ♪ Jingle jingle ♪
  9289.  
  9290. 2038
  9291. 01:27:09,780 --> 01:27:12,180
  9292. ♪ Oh what fun it is to ride ♪
  9293.  
  9294. 2039
  9295. 01:27:12,190 --> 01:27:14,190
  9296. ♪ In a one-horse open sleigh ♪
  9297.  
  9298. 2040
  9299. 01:27:14,190 --> 01:27:17,690
  9300. ♪ Hey jingle bells
  9301. jingle bells ♪
  9302.  
  9303. 2041
  9304. 01:27:17,690 --> 01:27:20,660
  9305. - ♪ Jingle all the way ♪
  9306. - ♪ Jingle jingle ♪
  9307.  
  9308. 2042
  9309. 01:27:20,660 --> 01:27:23,130
  9310. ♪ Oh what fun it is to ride ♪
  9311.  
  9312. 2043
  9313. 01:27:23,130 --> 01:27:27,870
  9314. ♪ In a one-horse open sleigh ♪
  9315.  
  9316. 2044
  9317. 01:27:34,880 --> 01:27:36,740
  9318. (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
  9319.  
  9320. 2045
  9321. 01:27:43,150 --> 01:27:46,350
  9322. Oh, my God!
  9323. This is amazing.
  9324.  
  9325. 2046
  9326. 01:27:47,590 --> 01:27:49,650
  9327. Merry Christmas, guys.
  9328.  
  9329. 2047
  9330. 01:27:49,660 --> 01:27:52,660
  9331. Mom, you really
  9332. did a lot of work.
  9333.  
  9334. 2048
  9335. 01:27:52,660 --> 01:27:54,560
  9336. I had a little help.
  9337.  
  9338. 2049
  9339. 01:27:55,830 --> 01:27:57,160
  9340. Merry Christmas, children.
  9341.  
  9342. 2050
  9343. 01:27:57,160 --> 01:27:59,400
  9344. Grandma.
  9345.  
  9346. 2051
  9347. 01:27:59,400 --> 01:28:02,700
  9348. Oh! Go open your presents.
  9349.  
  9350. 2052
  9351. 01:28:02,700 --> 01:28:05,570
  9352. I got you seasons one through
  9353. six of "The Walking Dead."
  9354.  
  9355. 2053
  9356. 01:28:05,570 --> 01:28:08,010
  9357. - Oh, good Lord. Really, mom?
  9358. - Thanks, grandma.
  9359.  
  9360. 2054
  9361. 01:28:08,010 --> 01:28:09,540
  9362. (DOORBELL RINGS)
  9363. I'll get it.
  9364.  
  9365. 2055
  9366. 01:28:09,540 --> 01:28:11,080
  9367. Oh, my God.
  9368.  
  9369. 2056
  9370. 01:28:12,210 --> 01:28:14,250
  9371. Merry Christmas!
  9372.  
  9373. 2057
  9374. 01:28:14,250 --> 01:28:17,250
  9375. Lori, Merry Christmas, honey.
  9376.  
  9377. 2058
  9378. 01:28:17,250 --> 01:28:20,250
  9379. - Merry Christmas, Ruth.
  9380. - Merry Christmas, Jesus.
  9381.  
  9382. 2059
  9383. 01:28:20,250 --> 01:28:22,750
  9384. Uh, it's, it's Jessie.
  9385.  
  9386. 2060
  9387. 01:28:22,760 --> 01:28:24,560
  9388. Wow, you have
  9389. really broad shoulders.
  9390.  
  9391. 2061
  9392. 01:28:24,560 --> 01:28:26,120
  9393. Amy, feel his shoulders.
  9394.  
  9395. 2062
  9396. 01:28:26,130 --> 01:28:27,730
  9397. Oh, here we go. Okay, mother.
  9398.  
  9399. 2063
  9400. 01:28:27,730 --> 01:28:29,590
  9401. Thank you. Get in.
  9402.  
  9403. 2064
  9404. 01:28:29,600 --> 01:28:32,360
  9405. Oh, thanks for almost
  9406. learning his name.
  9407.  
  9408. 2065
  9409. 01:28:32,370 --> 01:28:34,270
  9410. I love you, girl.
  9411.  
  9412. 2066
  9413. 01:28:38,370 --> 01:28:39,710
  9414. Merry Christmas, Kiki.
  9415.  
  9416. 2067
  9417. 01:28:40,870 --> 01:28:42,710
  9418. Merry Christmas, mom.
  9419.  
  9420. 2068
  9421. 01:28:42,710 --> 01:28:44,610
  9422. Do you like my
  9423. Kiki-head pajamas?
  9424.  
  9425. 2069
  9426. 01:28:47,780 --> 01:28:50,080
  9427. - Sort of.
  9428. - Thank you.
  9429.  
  9430. 2070
  9431. 01:28:50,080 --> 01:28:51,280
  9432. I just wanted to let you know
  9433.  
  9434. 2071
  9435. 01:28:51,290 --> 01:28:52,920
  9436. that I have put the house
  9437.  
  9438. 2072
  9439. 01:28:52,920 --> 01:28:55,150
  9440. next door on the market.
  9441.  
  9442. 2073
  9443. 01:28:55,160 --> 01:28:56,750
  9444. - Thank you.
  9445. - You're welcome.
  9446.  
  9447. 2074
  9448. 01:28:56,760 --> 01:28:58,220
  9449. I really appreciate that.
  9450.  
  9451. 2075
  9452. 01:28:58,220 --> 01:29:00,660
  9453. I know I can be a little
  9454. psycho sometimes.
  9455.  
  9456. 2076
  9457. 01:29:00,660 --> 01:29:02,630
  9458. And I know you need your space.
  9459.  
  9460. 2077
  9461. 01:29:02,630 --> 01:29:06,660
  9462. Which is why I bought the house
  9463. across the street.
  9464.  
  9465. 2078
  9466. 01:29:06,670 --> 01:29:09,730
  9467. No, I'm kidding. I didn't buy
  9468. the house across the street.
  9469.  
  9470. 2079
  9471. 01:29:09,740 --> 01:29:10,900
  9472. I bought the house
  9473. down the street.
  9474.  
  9475. 2080
  9476. 01:29:10,900 --> 01:29:12,240
  9477. - What?
  9478. - No.
  9479.  
  9480. 2081
  9481. 01:29:12,240 --> 01:29:13,470
  9482. I'm gonna move into your attic.
  9483.  
  9484. 2082
  9485. 01:29:13,470 --> 01:29:15,940
  9486. - Mom! Seriously.
  9487. - Kiki, what?
  9488.  
  9489. 2083
  9490. 01:29:15,940 --> 01:29:17,740
  9491. Where are you living?
  9492.  
  9493. 2084
  9494. 01:29:17,740 --> 01:29:21,480
  9495. I'm gonna go back to Bismarck
  9496. where I belong.
  9497.  
  9498. 2085
  9499. 01:29:21,480 --> 01:29:23,520
  9500. - Thank you.
  9501. - You're welcome.
  9502.  
  9503. 2086
  9504. 01:29:23,520 --> 01:29:25,020
  9505. I just...
  9506.  
  9507. 2087
  9508. 01:29:26,820 --> 01:29:29,360
  9509. I really miss your dad
  9510. on Christmas.
  9511.  
  9512. 2088
  9513. 01:29:30,790 --> 01:29:32,260
  9514. I do too.
  9515.  
  9516. 2089
  9517. 01:29:32,260 --> 01:29:33,260
  9518. Yeah.
  9519.  
  9520. 2090
  9521. 01:29:35,200 --> 01:29:36,530
  9522. I do too.
  9523.  
  9524. 2091
  9525. 01:29:37,500 --> 01:29:40,000
  9526. Merry Christmas.
  9527.  
  9528. 2092
  9529. 01:29:40,000 --> 01:29:41,370
  9530. Merry Christmas, mom.
  9531.  
  9532. 2093
  9533. 01:29:46,510 --> 01:29:48,310
  9534. (SLURPING)
  9535.  
  9536. 2094
  9537. 01:29:52,450 --> 01:29:54,610
  9538. Hey, mom,
  9539. look what Santa got me.
  9540.  
  9541. 2095
  9542. 01:29:54,610 --> 01:29:56,380
  9543. A used baseball glove.
  9544.  
  9545. 2096
  9546. 01:29:56,380 --> 01:29:57,850
  9547. Oh, that's great, buddy.
  9548.  
  9549. 2097
  9550. 01:29:57,850 --> 01:29:59,620
  9551. I used to have one just like it.
  9552.  
  9553. 2098
  9554. 01:29:59,620 --> 01:30:00,960
  9555. (KNOCK ON DOOR)
  9556.  
  9557. 2099
  9558. 01:30:02,790 --> 01:30:04,130
  9559. Is that Santa?
  9560.  
  9561. 2100
  9562. 01:30:05,330 --> 01:30:06,730
  9563. Why would it be Santa, honey?
  9564.  
  9565. 2101
  9566. 01:30:06,730 --> 01:30:08,660
  9567. Remember, Santa came last night.
  9568.  
  9569. 2102
  9570. 01:30:13,700 --> 01:30:15,640
  9571. Can I come in?
  9572.  
  9573. 2103
  9574. 01:30:24,750 --> 01:30:25,750
  9575. Hm.
  9576.  
  9577. 2104
  9578. 01:30:26,980 --> 01:30:31,020
  9579. Um, alright, I know I haven't
  9580.  
  9581. 2105
  9582. 01:30:31,020 --> 01:30:33,350
  9583. been the best mother
  9584. in the world.
  9585.  
  9586. 2106
  9587. 01:30:35,320 --> 01:30:42,190
  9588. But you... somehow just
  9589. turned out really good.
  9590.  
  9591. 2107
  9592. 01:30:42,200 --> 01:30:45,730
  9593. Um, and, Carla, I just...
  9594.  
  9595. 2108
  9596. 01:30:47,500 --> 01:30:49,400
  9597. I wanna be more like you.
  9598.  
  9599. 2109
  9600. 01:30:51,100 --> 01:30:55,410
  9601. So, I've given up gambling...
  9602.  
  9603. 2110
  9604. 01:30:55,410 --> 01:30:58,080
  9605. - Mom.
  9606. - On horses.
  9607.  
  9608. 2111
  9609. 01:30:58,080 --> 01:31:04,950
  9610. And I'm gonna pay you back every
  9611. cent that I borrowed from you.
  9612.  
  9613. 2112
  9614. 01:31:09,920 --> 01:31:11,590
  9615. - Really?
  9616. - Yeah.
  9617.  
  9618. 2113
  9619. 01:31:11,590 --> 01:31:13,930
  9620. You know, I got a fucking job.
  9621.  
  9622. 2114
  9623. 01:31:15,560 --> 01:31:17,460
  9624. - Are you fucking kidding me?
  9625. - No!
  9626.  
  9627. 2115
  9628. 01:31:17,460 --> 01:31:21,930
  9629. They hired me to be in charge
  9630. of children's safety.
  9631.  
  9632. 2116
  9633. 01:31:21,930 --> 01:31:25,900
  9634. Why would
  9635. they let you do that?
  9636.  
  9637. 2117
  9638. 01:31:25,910 --> 01:31:27,940
  9639. I don't even know
  9640. how I passed the drug test.
  9641.  
  9642. 2118
  9643. 01:31:27,940 --> 01:31:30,710
  9644. - Seriously?
  9645. - They're crazy.
  9646.  
  9647. 2119
  9648. 01:31:30,710 --> 01:31:33,140
  9649. And with what they're paying me,
  9650. I think I can pay you back
  9651.  
  9652. 2120
  9653. 01:31:33,150 --> 01:31:36,250
  9654. in about 245 years.
  9655.  
  9656. 2121
  9657. 01:31:36,250 --> 01:31:40,650
  9658. Wait, does this mean
  9659. you're gonna... stick around
  9660.  
  9661. 2122
  9662. 01:31:40,650 --> 01:31:42,060
  9663. for a while?
  9664.  
  9665. 2123
  9666. 01:31:43,920 --> 01:31:46,460
  9667. If it's cool with you, yeah.
  9668.  
  9669. 2124
  9670. 01:31:48,130 --> 01:31:49,130
  9671. Mom.
  9672.  
  9673. 2125
  9674. 01:31:50,800 --> 01:31:52,830
  9675. It's all I've ever wanted.
  9676.  
  9677. 2126
  9678. 01:31:52,830 --> 01:31:55,600
  9679. Well, I'll stay
  9680. as long as you want me to.
  9681.  
  9682. 2127
  9683. 01:31:57,440 --> 01:31:58,440
  9684. Mom.
  9685.  
  9686. 2128
  9687. 01:32:01,270 --> 01:32:05,010
  9688. Mom, also I got
  9689. a box of Ziploc bags.
  9690.  
  9691. 2129
  9692. 01:32:05,010 --> 01:32:07,240
  9693. Oh, sweet Jesus.
  9694.  
  9695. 2130
  9696. 01:32:07,250 --> 01:32:08,650
  9697. (JACOB LATRELL SINGING
  9698. "WHAT CHRISTMAS MEANS TO ME")
  9699.  
  9700. 2131
  9701. 01:32:08,650 --> 01:32:10,280
  9702. ♪ Oh yeah ♪
  9703.  
  9704. 2132
  9705. 01:32:10,280 --> 01:32:13,120
  9706. ♪ Candles burnin' low ♪
  9707.  
  9708. 2133
  9709. 01:32:13,120 --> 01:32:16,090
  9710. ♪ Lots of mistletoe ♪
  9711.  
  9712. 2134
  9713. 01:32:16,090 --> 01:32:18,920
  9714. ♪ Lots of snow and ice ♪
  9715.  
  9716. 2135
  9717. 01:32:18,920 --> 01:32:21,990
  9718. ♪ Everywhere we go ♪
  9719.  
  9720. 2136
  9721. 01:32:22,000 --> 01:32:24,030
  9722. ♪ Choir singing carols ♪
  9723.  
  9724. 2137
  9725. 01:32:24,030 --> 01:32:27,530
  9726. - Shaobing for everybody.
  9727. - Bing with everybody but me.
  9728.  
  9729. 2138
  9730. 01:32:27,530 --> 01:32:30,770
  9731. ♪ All these things and more ♪
  9732.  
  9733. 2139
  9734. 01:32:30,770 --> 01:32:33,300
  9735. God, Chinese food on Christmas.
  9736.  
  9737. 2140
  9738. 01:32:33,310 --> 01:32:35,170
  9739. I feel like such a Jew.
  9740.  
  9741. 2141
  9742. 01:32:35,170 --> 01:32:37,040
  9743. Would you like some shaobing?
  9744.  
  9745. 2142
  9746. 01:32:37,040 --> 01:32:38,840
  9747. Oh, you know I would.
  9748.  
  9749. 2143
  9750. 01:32:38,840 --> 01:32:41,010
  9751. No, honey,
  9752. that is Ruth's husband.
  9753.  
  9754. 2144
  9755. 01:32:41,010 --> 01:32:42,650
  9756. Oh, honestly, have at it.
  9757.  
  9758. 2145
  9759. 01:32:42,650 --> 01:32:44,480
  9760. Hank deserves a little fun
  9761. at Christmas.
  9762.  
  9763. 2146
  9764. 01:32:44,480 --> 01:32:47,320
  9765. Oh.
  9766.  
  9767. 2147
  9768. 01:32:47,320 --> 01:32:49,390
  9769. RUTH:
  9770. I love this.
  9771.  
  9772. 2148
  9773. 01:32:49,390 --> 01:32:51,490
  9774. Guys, I can't believe
  9775. that we're eating Chinese food
  9776.  
  9777. 2149
  9778. 01:32:51,490 --> 01:32:55,330
  9779. for Christmas dinner
  9780. and my mother is loving it.
  9781.  
  9782. 2150
  9783. 01:32:55,330 --> 01:32:56,900
  9784. I can't believe my mom's not
  9785. wearing a sweatshirt.
  9786.  
  9787. 2151
  9788. 01:32:56,900 --> 01:33:00,200
  9789. - With my face on it.
  9790. - Guys, we did it.
  9791.  
  9792. 2152
  9793. 01:33:00,200 --> 01:33:03,640
  9794. We actually took
  9795. Christmas back this year.
  9796.  
  9797. 2153
  9798. 01:33:03,640 --> 01:33:05,170
  9799. You know what? I couldn't
  9800. have done it without you girls.
  9801.  
  9802. 2154
  9803. 01:33:05,170 --> 01:33:07,200
  9804. - Oh!
  9805. - Ladies, I love you.
  9806.  
  9807. 2155
  9808. 01:33:07,210 --> 01:33:09,240
  9809. - We love you back.
  9810. - Same here.
  9811.  
  9812. 2156
  9813. 01:33:09,240 --> 01:33:10,910
  9814. (INDISTINCT CHATTER)
  9815.  
  9816. 2157
  9817. 01:33:10,910 --> 01:33:13,310
  9818. Hi, is, um...
  9819.  
  9820. 2158
  9821. 01:33:13,310 --> 01:33:15,220
  9822. - Is Carla here?
  9823. - Yes!
  9824.  
  9825. 2159
  9826. 01:33:18,150 --> 01:33:20,180
  9827. Ty Swindle.
  9828.  
  9829. 2160
  9830. 01:33:20,190 --> 01:33:22,850
  9831. How did you find me?
  9832.  
  9833. 2161
  9834. 01:33:22,860 --> 01:33:27,160
  9835. - I just looked for you.
  9836. - Hi.
  9837.  
  9838. 2162
  9839. 01:33:27,160 --> 01:33:29,930
  9840. Well, there are so many things
  9841. I wanna say to you right now.
  9842.  
  9843. 2163
  9844. 01:33:29,930 --> 01:33:32,160
  9845. Just say it.
  9846.  
  9847. 2164
  9848. 01:33:32,170 --> 01:33:33,730
  9849. I feel like it's better
  9850. if I, I do it through
  9851.  
  9852. 2165
  9853. 01:33:33,730 --> 01:33:35,830
  9854. the universal language
  9855. of dance.
  9856.  
  9857. 2166
  9858. 01:33:35,840 --> 01:33:37,830
  9859. - Shut up.
  9860. - Yes!
  9861.  
  9862. 2167
  9863. 01:33:37,840 --> 01:33:40,170
  9864. - What dancing?
  9865. - Christmas dancing.
  9866.  
  9867. 2168
  9868. 01:33:42,010 --> 01:33:43,910
  9869. (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
  9870.  
  9871. 2169
  9872. 01:33:49,450 --> 01:33:50,550
  9873. Oh, Ty!
  9874.  
  9875. 2170
  9876. 01:33:50,550 --> 01:33:51,780
  9877. ♪ Well I'm feeling ♪
  9878.  
  9879. 2171
  9880. 01:33:51,790 --> 01:33:53,750
  9881. ♪ Mighty fine y'all ♪
  9882.  
  9883. 2172
  9884. 01:33:53,750 --> 01:33:57,290
  9885. ♪ Got my music on the radio ♪
  9886.  
  9887. 2173
  9888. 01:33:57,290 --> 01:33:59,790
  9889. - Oh, boy.
  9890. - Oh, my God.
  9891.  
  9892. 2174
  9893. 01:33:59,790 --> 01:34:03,290
  9894. ♪ Well I'm feeling
  9895. mighty nice Lord ♪
  9896.  
  9897. 2175
  9898. 01:34:03,300 --> 01:34:08,030
  9899. ♪ Got my music on the radio ♪
  9900.  
  9901. 2176
  9902. 01:34:08,030 --> 01:34:09,630
  9903. That's beautiful, Ty.
  9904.  
  9905. 2177
  9906. 01:34:09,640 --> 01:34:12,940
  9907. ♪ Feel like I wanna
  9908. kiss you baby ♪
  9909.  
  9910. 2178
  9911. 01:34:12,940 --> 01:34:17,610
  9912. ♪ Standin' underneath
  9913. that mistletoe ♪
  9914.  
  9915. 2179
  9916. 01:34:17,610 --> 01:34:19,910
  9917. Oh, my fucking God.
  9918.  
  9919. 2180
  9920. 01:34:19,910 --> 01:34:22,050
  9921. Turn her around.
  9922. Turn her around.
  9923.  
  9924. 2181
  9925. 01:34:22,050 --> 01:34:24,050
  9926. It's okay,
  9927. just turn her around.
  9928.  
  9929. 2182
  9930. 01:34:24,050 --> 01:34:27,890
  9931. ♪ Maybe left all them good
  9932. presents for my baby ♪
  9933.  
  9934. 2183
  9935. 01:34:27,890 --> 01:34:31,660
  9936. ♪ I said Merry Christmas baby ♪
  9937.  
  9938. 2184
  9939. 01:34:31,660 --> 01:34:34,630
  9940. ♪ Surely you treat me nice ♪
  9941.  
  9942. 2185
  9943. 01:34:34,630 --> 01:34:36,990
  9944. ♪ You surely treat me nice ♪
  9945.  
  9946. 2186
  9947. 01:34:37,000 --> 01:34:40,100
  9948. Okay, alright,
  9949. that's great.
  9950.  
  9951. 2187
  9952. 01:34:40,100 --> 01:34:42,500
  9953. Okay, we're done.
  9954. That was amazing.
  9955.  
  9956. 2188
  9957. 01:34:42,500 --> 01:34:44,240
  9958. Thank you so much.
  9959.  
  9960. 2189
  9961. 01:34:44,240 --> 01:34:45,640
  9962. Just go for it, dude.
  9963.  
  9964. 2190
  9965. 01:34:45,640 --> 01:34:48,140
  9966. Oh, baby, don't cry.
  9967.  
  9968. 2191
  9969. 01:34:48,140 --> 01:34:51,340
  9970. Phew! He's so hot.
  9971.  
  9972. 2192
  9973. 01:34:51,340 --> 01:34:53,580
  9974. - That's my son.
  9975. - Yeah?
  9976.  
  9977. 2193
  9978. 01:34:53,580 --> 01:34:54,980
  9979. - Hey, man.
  9980. - Right there.
  9981.  
  9982. 2194
  9983. 01:34:54,980 --> 01:34:57,080
  9984. - That's Jaxon.
  9985. - Hey, there. How are you?
  9986.  
  9987. 2195
  9988. 01:34:57,080 --> 01:34:59,350
  9989. - Nice to meet you.
  9990. - Mm-hmm.
  9991.  
  9992. 2196
  9993. 01:34:59,350 --> 01:35:00,850
  9994. - I'll take you right in there.
  9995. - I love you.
  9996.  
  9997. 2197
  9998. 01:35:00,850 --> 01:35:02,320
  9999. I love you.
  10000.  
  10001. 2198
  10002. 01:35:02,320 --> 01:35:04,090
  10003. - Phew!
  10004. - Whoo!
  10005.  
  10006. 2199
  10007. 01:35:04,090 --> 01:35:07,530
  10008. Oh, we better get going
  10009. or we're gonna miss our flight.
  10010.  
  10011. 2200
  10012. 01:35:07,530 --> 01:35:10,190
  10013. - What flight?
  10014. - Oh, I didn't tell you?
  10015.  
  10016. 2201
  10017. 01:35:10,200 --> 01:35:13,460
  10018. Isis, Ruth and I are going
  10019. to Las Vegas for New Year's.
  10020.  
  10021. 2202
  10022. 01:35:13,470 --> 01:35:16,670
  10023. And we're gonna see
  10024. Wayne Newton before he dies.
  10025.  
  10026. 2203
  10027. 01:35:16,670 --> 01:35:18,170
  10028. Whoo!
  10029.  
  10030. 2204
  10031. 01:35:18,170 --> 01:35:20,500
  10032. The three of you are going
  10033. to Vegas together?
  10034.  
  10035. 2205
  10036. 01:35:20,510 --> 01:35:23,440
  10037. Yeah, well,
  10038. we're best friends now.
  10039.  
  10040. 2206
  10041. 01:35:23,440 --> 01:35:25,340
  10042. Well, we're, we're new friends.
  10043.  
  10044. 2207
  10045. 01:35:25,340 --> 01:35:27,150
  10046. We're best friends.
  10047.  
  10048. 2208
  10049. 01:35:27,150 --> 01:35:30,180
  10050. Yeah, we're new friends.
  10051.  
  10052. 2209
  10053. 01:35:30,180 --> 01:35:33,280
  10054. Anyways,
  10055. Merry Christmas, everyone.
  10056.  
  10057. 2210
  10058. 01:35:33,290 --> 01:35:35,990
  10059. - Merry Christmas.
  10060. - Merry Christmas, everyone.
  10061.  
  10062. 2211
  10063. 01:35:35,990 --> 01:35:38,660
  10064. Hank, get all our bags.
  10065.  
  10066. 2212
  10067. 01:35:38,660 --> 01:35:40,890
  10068. - ♪ I do what I want ♪
  10069. - ♪ She does ♪
  10070.  
  10071. 2213
  10072. 01:35:40,890 --> 01:35:42,790
  10073. ♪ Say what you say ♪
  10074.  
  10075. 2214
  10076. 01:35:42,800 --> 01:35:45,060
  10077. ♪ I work real hard everyday ♪
  10078.  
  10079. 2215
  10080. 01:35:45,060 --> 01:35:47,460
  10081. ♪ I'm a motherfucking woman ♪
  10082.  
  10083. 2216
  10084. 01:35:47,470 --> 01:35:49,700
  10085. ♪ Baby alright ♪
  10086.  
  10087. 2217
  10088. 01:35:49,700 --> 01:35:51,300
  10089. ♪ I don't need a man ♪
  10090.  
  10091. 2218
  10092. 01:35:51,300 --> 01:35:53,500
  10093. ♪ To be holding me too tight ♪
  10094.  
  10095. 2219
  10096. 01:35:53,510 --> 01:35:55,840
  10097. ♪ I'm a motherfucking woman ♪
  10098.  
  10099. 2220
  10100. 01:35:55,840 --> 01:35:58,180
  10101. ♪ Baby that's right ♪
  10102.  
  10103. 2221
  10104. 01:35:58,180 --> 01:36:01,810
  10105. ♪ I'm just having fun with
  10106. my ladies here tonight ♪
  10107.  
  10108. 2222
  10109. 01:36:01,810 --> 01:36:04,150
  10110. ♪ I'm a motherfucker ♪
  10111.  
  10112. 2223
  10113. 01:36:04,150 --> 01:36:06,050
  10114. (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
  10115.  
  10116. 2224
  10117. 01:36:11,860 --> 01:36:14,090
  10118. Merry Christmas, everyone!
  10119.  
  10120. 2225
  10121. 01:36:14,100 --> 01:36:17,860
  10122. Subtitle By: explosiveskull & Re-Sync By: bozxphd
  10123. & Improved By: Fidel33
  10124. Sub Upload Date: July 16, 2018
  10125.  
  10126. 2226
  10127. 01:36:17,860 --> 01:36:18,900
  10128. (CHARLES JONES SINGING
  10129. "BE YOUR SANTA CLAUS")
  10130.  
  10131. 2227
  10132. 01:36:18,900 --> 01:36:21,670
  10133. ♪ Ho ho ho girl ♪
  10134.  
  10135. 2228
  10136. 01:36:21,670 --> 01:36:23,830
  10137. ♪ You're on my naughty list ♪
  10138.  
  10139. 2229
  10140. 01:36:23,840 --> 01:36:24,840
  10141. ♪ Tonight ♪
  10142.  
  10143. 2230
  10144. 01:36:27,540 --> 01:36:31,540
  10145. ♪ Ho whoa-oh ♪
  10146.  
  10147. 2231
  10148. 01:36:31,540 --> 01:36:34,350
  10149. ♪ Yeah yeah ♪
  10150.  
  10151. 2232
  10152. 01:36:34,350 --> 01:36:37,250
  10153. ♪ Oh whoa-oh ♪
  10154.  
  10155. 2233
  10156. 01:36:37,250 --> 01:36:38,780
  10157. ♪ You know
  10158. I got to tell you girl ♪
  10159.  
  10160. 2234
  10161. 01:36:38,790 --> 01:36:40,180
  10162. ♪ You're something special ♪
  10163.  
  10164. 2235
  10165. 01:36:40,190 --> 01:36:41,750
  10166. ♪ The way I feel babe ♪
  10167.  
  10168. 2236
  10169. 01:36:41,760 --> 01:36:43,090
  10170. ♪ Gotta have you ♪
  10171.  
  10172. 2237
  10173. 01:36:43,090 --> 01:36:44,890
  10174. ♪ Right here with me ♪
  10175.  
  10176. 2238
  10177. 01:36:44,890 --> 01:36:46,890
  10178. ♪ I will never let you go ♪
  10179.  
  10180. 2239
  10181. 01:36:46,890 --> 01:36:48,560
  10182. ♪ Hey ♪
  10183.  
  10184. 2240
  10185. 01:36:48,560 --> 01:36:49,960
  10186. ♪ You stuck with me
  10187. through the times ♪
  10188.  
  10189. 2241
  10190. 01:36:49,960 --> 01:36:51,400
  10191. ♪ I didn't have it ♪
  10192.  
  10193. 2242
  10194. 01:36:51,400 --> 01:36:52,700
  10195. ♪ Now we got something good ♪
  10196.  
  10197. 2243
  10198. 01:36:52,700 --> 01:36:54,360
  10199. ♪ You can have the plastic ♪
  10200.  
  10201. 2244
  10202. 01:36:54,370 --> 01:36:56,700
  10203. ♪ And anything you want
  10204. you can have it ♪
  10205.  
  10206. 2245
  10207. 01:36:56,700 --> 01:36:59,400
  10208. ♪ I wanna be your Santa Claus ♪
  10209.  
  10210. 2246
  10211. 01:36:59,410 --> 01:37:02,210
  10212. ♪ You're always
  10213. working hard girl ♪
  10214.  
  10215. 2247
  10216. 01:37:02,210 --> 01:37:04,540
  10217. ♪ Tonight
  10218. we're taking off girl ♪
  10219.  
  10220. 2248
  10221. 01:37:04,540 --> 01:37:07,240
  10222. - ♪ I wanna be your Santa Claus ♪
  10223. - ♪ Wanna be your Santa Claus ♪
  10224.  
  10225. 2249
  10226. 01:37:07,250 --> 01:37:10,050
  10227. - ♪ Let me be your Santa Claus ♪
  10228. - ♪ Let me be your Santa Claus ♪
  10229.  
  10230. 2250
  10231. 01:37:10,050 --> 01:37:15,550
  10232. ♪ I wanna be the first gift
  10233. you open tonight ♪
  10234.  
  10235. 2251
  10236. 01:37:15,550 --> 01:37:18,560
  10237. - ♪ I wanna be your Santa Claus ♪
  10238. - ♪ Wanna be your Santa Claus ♪
  10239.  
  10240. 2252
  10241. 01:37:18,560 --> 01:37:21,260
  10242. - ♪ Let me be your Santa Claus ♪
  10243. - ♪ Let me be your Santa Claus ♪
  10244.  
  10245. 2253
  10246. 01:37:21,260 --> 01:37:25,000
  10247. ♪ I wanna be the reason
  10248. that you come home tonight ♪
  10249.  
  10250. 2254
  10251. 01:37:25,000 --> 01:37:28,070
  10252. ♪ Feel so good tonight baby ♪
  10253.  
  10254. 2255
  10255. 01:37:28,070 --> 01:37:30,900
  10256. ♪ Baby take your time with me ♪
  10257.  
  10258. 2256
  10259. 01:37:30,900 --> 01:37:34,670
  10260. ♪ I'm your gift
  10261. unwrap me slowly ♪
  10262.  
  10263. 2257
  10264. 01:37:34,670 --> 01:37:36,470
  10265. ♪ The fireplace is burnin'
  10266. perfect time to... ♪
  10267.  
  10268. 2258
  10269. 01:37:36,480 --> 01:37:40,180
  10270. ♪ Girl I got something
  10271. special for you ♪
  10272.  
  10273. 2259
  10274. 01:37:40,180 --> 01:37:42,750
  10275. ♪ Girl I gotta be ♪
  10276.  
  10277. 2260
  10278. 01:37:42,750 --> 01:37:45,180
  10279. ♪ Oh ♪
  10280.  
  10281. 2261
  10282. 01:37:45,180 --> 01:37:47,190
  10283. ♪ I don't wanna spend
  10284. this Christmas ♪
  10285.  
  10286. 2262
  10287. 01:37:47,190 --> 01:37:49,650
  10288. ♪ Without you letting
  10289. me feel ♪
  10290.  
  10291. 2263
  10292. 01:37:49,660 --> 01:37:51,320
  10293. ♪ Hey ♪
  10294.  
  10295. 2264
  10296. 01:37:51,320 --> 01:37:52,760
  10297. ♪ Your Santa baby ♪
  10298.  
  10299. 2265
  10300. 01:37:52,760 --> 01:37:56,690
  10301. ♪ Santa baby ♪
  10302.  
  10303. 2266
  10304. 01:37:56,700 --> 01:37:58,960
  10305. ♪ Tonight tonight ♪
  10306.  
  10307. 2267
  10308. 01:37:58,960 --> 01:38:02,100
  10309. - ♪ I wanna be your Santa Claus ♪
  10310. - ♪ Wanna be your Santa Claus ♪
  10311.  
  10312. 2268
  10313. 01:38:02,100 --> 01:38:04,840
  10314. - ♪ Let me be your Santa Claus ♪
  10315. - ♪ Let me be your Santa Claus ♪
  10316.  
  10317. 2269
  10318. 01:38:04,840 --> 01:38:08,270
  10319. ♪ I wanna be the reason
  10320. that you come home tonight ♪
  10321.  
  10322. 2270
  10323. 01:38:08,270 --> 01:38:10,370
  10324. ♪ Come home tonight ♪
  10325.  
  10326. 2271
  10327. 01:38:10,380 --> 01:38:13,140
  10328. - ♪ I wanna be your Santa Claus ♪
  10329. - ♪ Wanna be your Santa Claus ♪
  10330.  
  10331. 2272
  10332. 01:38:13,150 --> 01:38:15,980
  10333. - ♪ Let me be your Santa Claus ♪
  10334. - ♪ Let me be your Santa Claus ♪
  10335.  
  10336. 2273
  10337. 01:38:15,980 --> 01:38:21,550
  10338. ♪ I wanna be the first gift
  10339. you open tonight ♪
  10340.  
  10341. 2274
  10342. 01:38:21,550 --> 01:38:23,450
  10343. - ♪ I wanna be ♪
  10344. - ♪ I wanna be ♪
  10345.  
  10346. 2275
  10347. 01:38:23,460 --> 01:38:25,490
  10348. ♪ I wanna be your Santa Claus ♪
  10349.  
  10350. 2276
  10351. 01:38:25,490 --> 01:38:28,120
  10352. ♪ Gotta gotta be gotta gotta be
  10353. your Santa Claus ♪
  10354.  
  10355. 2277
  10356. 01:38:28,130 --> 01:38:30,830
  10357. ♪ Let me be your Santa Claus ♪
  10358.  
  10359. 2278
  10360. 01:38:30,830 --> 01:38:34,800
  10361. ♪ Tonight ♪
  10362.  
  10363. 2279
  10364. 01:38:34,800 --> 01:38:37,170
  10365. ♪ Merry Christmas baby ♪
  10366.  
  10367. 2280
  10368. 01:38:37,170 --> 01:38:40,470
  10369. ♪ I do my hair toss
  10370. check my nails ♪
  10371.  
  10372. 2281
  10373. 01:38:40,470 --> 01:38:43,070
  10374. - ♪ Baby how you feelin' ♪
  10375. - ♪ Feeling good as hell ♪
  10376.  
  10377. 2282
  10378. 01:38:43,080 --> 01:38:45,410
  10379. ♪ Hair toss
  10380. check my nails ♪
  10381.  
  10382. 2283
  10383. 01:38:45,410 --> 01:38:48,550
  10384. - ♪ Baby how you feelin'? ♪
  10385. - ♪ Feeling good as hell ♪
  10386.  
  10387. 2284
  10388. 01:38:48,550 --> 01:38:50,580
  10389. ♪ Feeling good as hell ♪
  10390.  
  10391. 2285
  10392. 01:38:50,580 --> 01:38:53,080
  10393. - ♪ Baby how you feelin'? ♪
  10394. - ♪ Feeling good as hell ♪
  10395.  
  10396. 2286
  10397. 01:38:53,090 --> 01:38:55,320
  10398. ♪ Whoo girl need to kick off
  10399. your shoes ♪
  10400.  
  10401. 2287
  10402. 01:38:55,320 --> 01:38:57,720
  10403. ♪ Got to take a deep breath
  10404. time to focus on you ♪
  10405.  
  10406. 2288
  10407. 01:38:57,720 --> 01:39:00,060
  10408. ♪ All the big fights long
  10409. nights that you been through ♪
  10410.  
  10411. 2289
  10412. 01:39:00,060 --> 01:39:03,160
  10413. ♪ I got a bottle of tequila
  10414. I been saving for you ♪
  10415.  
  10416. 2290
  10417. 01:39:03,160 --> 01:39:05,000
  10418. ♪ Boss up and change
  10419. your life ♪
  10420.  
  10421. 2291
  10422. 01:39:05,000 --> 01:39:07,430
  10423. ♪ You can have it all
  10424. no sacrifice ♪
  10425.  
  10426. 2292
  10427. 01:39:07,430 --> 01:39:09,600
  10428. ♪ I know he did you wrong
  10429. we can make it right ♪
  10430.  
  10431. 2293
  10432. 01:39:09,600 --> 01:39:12,870
  10433. ♪ So go and let it
  10434. all hang out tonight ♪
  10435.  
  10436. 2294
  10437. 01:39:12,870 --> 01:39:17,610
  10438. ♪ 'Cause he don't
  10439. love you anymore ♪
  10440.  
  10441. 2295
  10442. 01:39:17,610 --> 01:39:22,210
  10443. ♪ So walk your fine ass
  10444. out the door ♪
  10445.  
  10446. 2296
  10447. 01:39:22,210 --> 01:39:25,420
  10448. ♪ And do your hair toss
  10449. check my nails ♪
  10450.  
  10451. 2297
  10452. 01:39:25,420 --> 01:39:28,120
  10453. - ♪ Baby how you feelin'? ♪
  10454. - ♪ Feeling good as hell ♪
  10455.  
  10456. 2298
  10457. 01:39:28,120 --> 01:39:30,520
  10458. ♪ Hair toss
  10459. check my nails ♪
  10460.  
  10461. 2299
  10462. 01:39:30,520 --> 01:39:33,190
  10463. - ♪ Baby how you feelin'? ♪
  10464. - ♪ Feeling good as hell ♪
  10465.  
  10466. 2300
  10467. 01:39:33,190 --> 01:39:35,530
  10468. ♪ Hair toss
  10469. check my nails ♪
  10470.  
  10471. 2301
  10472. 01:39:35,530 --> 01:39:37,900
  10473. - ♪ Baby how you feelin'? ♪
  10474. - ♪ Feeling good as hell ♪
  10475.  
  10476. 2302
  10477. 01:39:37,900 --> 01:39:40,630
  10478. ♪ Hair toss
  10479. check my nails ♪
  10480.  
  10481. 2303
  10482. 01:39:40,630 --> 01:39:43,700
  10483. - ♪ Baby how you feelin'? ♪
  10484. - ♪ Feeling good as hell ♪
  10485.  
  10486. 2304
  10487. 01:39:45,370 --> 01:39:46,700
  10488. ♪ Ooh ♪
  10489.  
  10490. 2305
  10491. 01:39:46,710 --> 01:39:48,810
  10492. ♪ Yeah ♪
  10493.  
  10494. 2306
  10495. 01:39:48,810 --> 01:39:51,280
  10496. ♪ Alright ♪
  10497.  
  10498. 2307
  10499. 01:39:51,280 --> 01:39:52,810
  10500. ♪ Listen ♪
  10501.  
  10502. 2308
  10503. 01:39:52,810 --> 01:39:57,710
  10504. ♪ If he don't
  10505. love you anymore ♪
  10506.  
  10507. 2309
  10508. 01:39:57,720 --> 01:40:02,460
  10509. ♪ Then walk your fine ass
  10510. out the door ♪
  10511.  
  10512. 2310
  10513. 01:40:04,620 --> 01:40:08,120
  10514. ♪ And do your hair toss
  10515. check my nails ♪
  10516.  
  10517. 2311
  10518. 01:40:08,130 --> 01:40:10,490
  10519. - ♪ Baby how you feelin'? ♪
  10520. - ♪ Feeling good as hell ♪
  10521.  
  10522. 2312
  10523. 01:40:10,500 --> 01:40:13,060
  10524. ♪ Hair toss
  10525. check my nails ♪
  10526.  
  10527. 2313
  10528. 01:40:13,070 --> 01:40:15,600
  10529. - ♪ Baby how you feelin'? ♪
  10530. - ♪ Feeling good as hell ♪
  10531.  
  10532. 2314
  10533. 01:40:15,600 --> 01:40:18,140
  10534. ♪ Hair toss
  10535. check my nails ♪
  10536.  
  10537. 2315
  10538. 01:40:18,140 --> 01:40:20,470
  10539. - ♪ Baby how you feelin'? ♪
  10540. - ♪ Feeling good as hell ♪
  10541.  
  10542. 2316
  10543. 01:40:20,470 --> 01:40:22,940
  10544. ♪ Hair toss
  10545. check my nails ♪
  10546.  
  10547. 2317
  10548. 01:40:22,940 --> 01:40:26,410
  10549. - ♪ Baby how you feelin'? ♪
  10550. - ♪ Feeling good as hell ♪
  10551.  
  10552. 2318
  10553. 01:40:26,410 --> 01:40:29,110
  10554. - ♪ Feeling good as hell ♪
  10555. - ♪ Baby how you feelin'? ♪
  10556.  
  10557. 2319
  10558. 01:40:29,120 --> 01:40:31,920
  10559. ♪ Feeling good as hell ♪
  10560.  
  10561. 2320
  10562. 01:40:31,920 --> 01:40:33,820
  10563. (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
  10564.  
  10565. 2321
  10566. 01:41:01,950 --> 01:41:03,850
  10567. (MUSIC CONTINUES)
  10568.  
  10569. 2322
  10570. 01:41:31,980 --> 01:41:33,880
  10571. (MUSIC CONTINUES)
  10572.  
  10573. 2323
  10574. 01:41:47,360 --> 01:41:49,400
  10575. (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
  10576.  
  10577. 2324
  10578. 01:42:02,010 --> 01:42:03,910
  10579. (MUSIC CONTINUES)
  10580.  
  10581. 2325
  10582. 01:42:32,040 --> 01:42:33,940
  10583. (MUSIC CONTINUES)
  10584.  
  10585. 2326
  10586. 01:43:02,070 --> 01:43:03,970
  10587. (MUSIC CONTINUES)
  10588.  
  10589. 2327
  10590. 01:43:12,580 --> 01:43:14,310
  10591. (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)
  10592.  
  10593. 2328
  10594. 01:43:32,100 --> 01:43:34,000
  10595. (MUSIC CONTINUES)
  10596.  
  10597. 2329
  10598. 01:44:02,130 --> 01:44:04,030
  10599. (MUSIC CONTINUES)
RAW Paste Data