Tusktaker's Secret Part 23

	Lorka and Thomas stood there in the gallery hallway, unsure of what to say to each other. This was the first time he’d try to talk to her since they’d broken up. Why now? Why after all this time had he decided to show up when she least expected it and throw everything upside down again?

Lorka broke the silence, her voice coming out in a cold whisper, “Why are you here?”

Thomas held up his hands. “Mom told me you’d probably show up. I just wanted to talk. I…”

“Talk? Oh, you just want to talk after you left me in the middle of the woods and didn’t say anything to me for over a month? Ha! That’s rich.” Lorka felt anger and resentment coursing through her body. She hadn’t expected herself to be so mad at Thomas. A part of her knew this wasn’t productive, but she didn’t care.

Thomas sighed and closed his eyes for a moment, as though he was trying to regain his nerve, “I just wanted to clear the air between us. Please? ”

Some of the patrons around them began to whisper to each other.  Lorka didn’t want to start a fight with Thomas in the middle of the gallery. She still cared about Thomas too. A part of her knew it would be best to just listen what he had to say. It was probably best to just find a quiet place to talk this out.

“There’s a rose garden out back. Fairly excluded.  It should give you two the privacy you need.”

Lorka turned around to notice a familiar face. It was that vampire from before…Tessa’s friend. She thought her name was Vani, but it’d been so long she wasn’t sure. She gave Lorka and Thomas a disinterested glance as she took another sip from the wineglass in her hands. “Just don’t want you two causing a scene.” She muttered.

Lorka gave the vampire a wicked glare, “Fine. We’ll ‘clear the air’. Let’s go. “Lorka grabbed Thomas by the hand and led him out of the gallery, various patrons making comments about a lover’s quarrel as the two walked past them. Embarrassment wasn’t even a factor; she just wanted to get out of here as quickly as possible.

Luckily, finding the rose garden wasn’t difficult. They just had to follow the signs. Still, Vani was right. The rose garden was fairly secluded, with the plants forming a ring around a set of chairs and a bench. They would have plenty of privacy. Lorka folded her arms as she sat on the bench.  She gave Thomas a harsh glare as he pulled up a chair in front of her and sat down, trying to maintain eye contact with her as best he could.

“I guess your mother only gave me those tickets so you could ‘surprise me’. Am I right?”

Thomas shook his head. “I didn’t even know she was going to do this. She just handed me a ticket and said you’d probably be here.”
“So why now?” She asked bluntly, “After all this time, after everything you did, why do you want to make things right now?”

“Nerada cornered me during lunch one day. She told me things got even worse with your dad, and she told me about you were giving up on college.” Thomas explained.

“So? What does any of that have to do with you?” Lorka huffed.

“You made me a promise. You said you’d straighten things out with your dad and get into that pharmacology program you always wanted.”
“It’s my life, Thomas. You don’t get to break a girl’s heart and then get to demand things from her. If that’s wha-“

“That’s not why I’m here.  I’m really worried about you Lorka.” For the first time since they’re conversation started, he averted his gaze, “Hearing that really bothered me. I know how much you care about your dad. And giving up on college…that just doesn’t sound like you.”

She let out an indignant snort, “So now you’re going to lecture me on who I’m supposed to be, huh?”

Thomas’s head darted back up as he waved his hands back and forth, “No no, that’s not what I’m saying either! I just…this is really hard.”
Her temper flared at Thomas’s words, “You think this is hard?” Lorka gave her old lover a bitter chuckle, “Try having your Aru’ka walk out on you when you needed him most. Trying giving up on everything you love to make your family happy because the one person you trusted more than anyone else turned his back on you. THAT was hard!”

Thomas just sat there, unsure of what to say, his eyes cast downward under Lorka’s withering gaze.
His voice was barely above a whisper when he finally broke the silence. “Want to know what else was really hard? Giving up my best friend in the entire world so that she could be happy, only to realize I’d just made her even more miserable."

Oh my god. Why did she say all of that? Even though he’d been misguided, he’d broken up with Lorka to protect her. Now he was trying to make things right and she was just trying to cut him down. “I shouldn’t have yelled at you like that, Thomas. I’m just angry. My life’s been a mess and I’ve been taking that out on you. That’s unfair. You’re here to try and straighten things out with me and I’m just acting like a petty bitch. I’m sorry.”

A look of relief flashed over Thomas’s face. “Please, tell me what you were going to say.” She said quietly.

Thomas sat on the bench next to Lorka, “I called you out here because I wanted to say…I’m sorry. What I did to you was really shitty. I thought I was making your life hell before we broke up. In my head, I was the anchor weighing you down. Your father was so angry…I thought that breaking up with you would fix everything. Your dad would forget about me and you two would iron out your problems. He’d help support you through college and you’d find someone better than me.” He cleared his throat before continuing, “But that wasn’t the only reason I broke up with you. I thought I didn’t deserve you. Until you came along, my life was absolute shit. You were the first person in a long time to make me truly happy. You were so beautiful, and smart and charming…and I felt like I didn’t deserve you.”

“But,” Thomas reached out and put a hand on Lorka’s “That was a terrible choice on my part. I completely cut you out of the loop because I thought that was the correct thing to do. I let my own personal issues get in the way of our relationship, and I hurt you and made everything worse in the process. It was a terrible mistake, and if I could take it back I would.” Tears started to stream down Thomas’s face as he gave Lorka a weak smile. “I love you Lorka. You’re the most important person in my life. Even if you don’t feel the same way, you’ll always be my Aru’ka in my heart.”

She’d been so foolish. This entire time, he’d been suffering just as much. He’d been misguided and stupid, but Thomas had broken up with Lorka to protect her. She felt so much frustration and anger lately and yet, her with Thomas’s hand on top of hers, she finally felt relief. All this time she’d been searching for an answer. What did she want most out of life? How should she live it? Her clan hadn’t helped. Cynthia and Nier’da had pointed her in the right direction, but their advice had only led her so far. But now, with Thomas next to her, she understood what she wanted.

This time it was Lorka’s turn to get misty eyed. She returned Thomas’s small smile with one of her own as she began to speak. “For the longest time, I’ve been struggling with who I am. I’m an orc and a Tusktaker, and I care deeply about those parts of my life. But I also care about humie thing. Literature, science, art…when you broke up with me, it hurt me so much. Every time I looked through my books, I kept thinking of you.”

Thomas leaned in closer, completely focused on her words as she continued., “Before I met you, Mom was the only person that ‘got’ me. Even then, she never understood me quite like you. When you left, it wasn’t the same. I was so angry and confused…I tossed all my books out because I thought losing myself in becoming a Tusktaker would give me the foundation I needed. Instead, it just made me hate myself. I was too weak to hold onto the things I cared about because I was so afraid of disappointing my dad and my clan. All this time I’ve been trying to become a real orc, an orc worthy of being from the Homelands. But that’s never going to happen because we aren’t on the Homelands anymore, we’re on Earth.”

Lorka sighed and put her other hand on top of Thomas’s, “I can’t be the person my father wants me to be. I have to live my life for myself, like a true orc.” She leaned in close to Thomas’s ear, “Do you remember the most important part of being an orc, Thomas?”
“Never giving up and always strive for the thing you want most out of life.” He told her.

She nodded her head. “And more than anything else in my life, I want my Aru’ka back.”

Tears started to swell down Thomas’s cheek as he looked into his lover’s eyes. “Lorka I…” She interrupted him with a ferocious kiss as she took him into her arms. “I just want you to know *kiss* I’m still angry at you. *kiss”

“Then what’s this?” Thomas said with a grin.

His orcess gave him a dour look, “Just shut up and kiss me again.”

Thomas was all too pleased to follow her command. His hand wandered over her breast, gently needing her flesh as their tongues intertwined.  Thomas’s hand began to drift down towards Lorka’s waist. Before he could slip his fingers under her dress she stopped him.
“Hold on. Before we get back together I want to lay some ground rules.” She told him.

“Okay” Thomas nodded.

“One, if there’s a big decision, we talk about it. Anything, jobs, family, whatever. Don’t just make up your mind without me and decide it’d be better if we were apart.”

“Perfectly reasonable.”

“Two, my dad doesn’t own me. If he doesn’t like the fact that we’re together, too bad. But if you want to be with me, you have to respect him, even if he acts like a jerk. I’ll make sure he doesn’t do anything to you, but you’ve got to support me on this one.”

“Not even a problem.”

“Three, you’re my Aru’ka. I’m not ‘too good’ for you. We’re equals, and I think you’re amazing. So start acting like it.”

Thomas blushed at her words. “O-okay.”

“Four”

Thomas frowned. “Four?”

Lorka gave him a fierce glare and nodded. “Four. And this is the most important one. You have to admit that Illustrated Man is better than the Martian Chronicles.”

Thomas gave Lorka an unamused glare, “I’m sorry, but that’s just too much to ask.”

Lorka’s lips cracked into a broad smile. She pinned her little humie to the bench and began to plant kisses all over his face. “I knew you said that. I missed you so much, Aru’ka.”

“I missed you too, Aru’ka.”