gardenia strat

LV: roark is ez pz
LV: I hate gardenia though
LV: in my personal opinion gardenia is the hardest boss in the entire pokemon series
LV: even after extensively grinding my fucking
LV: shit I forgot the name
LV: fucking 2nd evolution penguin kid
LV: anyways, after grinding them to like level 30 something, I still have to rely on godlike rng to win
LV: the most consistent strat I've been able to come up with is:
LV: when she sends out turtwig, spam metal claw
LV: if turtwig doesn't use reflect on turn 1 reset
LV: you need to spam metal claw and get at least 2 attack boosts, 3 if you don't want to need to get fucked in the ass by her roserade 93% of the time
LV: if you get a critical hit or her turtwig dies before you have 2 attack boosts reset
LV: if you have 2 or 3 attack boosts then the cherrim is literally free, just use peck
LV: if you have 3 attack boosts then you can kill the roserade, if you only have 2 then you need a critical hit
LV: if you don't 1 tap her then reset
LV: the key thing to take away is "if insertPerfectRNGHere doesn't happen reset"
LV: I hate gardenia so fucking bad
LV: worse than fucking cow fucker with her fucking panzer 4
LV: I have no idea what the fuck the game developers were thinking when they designed that fight
LV: or what they were smoking
LV: they were probably like "hey, you know all of those kids who pick piplup? those kids who pick the best starter? fuck them, let's make all of those kids want to kill themselves"
LV: i can guarantee a conversation like that happened at nintendo when they were designing platinum
LV: verbatim
LV: that conversation happened in english
LV: not japanese
LV: the internet guides tell you to be a wuss and go catch a ponyta, but I'm a real alpha gamer who plays the game the way you're supposed to without any of those girl strats: starter only, no x attacks, no stat boosting moves