Blendings

A game by increpare (http://www.increpare.com)

The Site
After five thousand years slumber, you awake. You feel slightly out of sorts.

You stand in a room. You are not alone. There are other entities here. You wonder what you should do.

You see a cat, a cactusopener, a button, and a lipstick here.

>examine lipstick
It looks like a small black tube of lipstick. It smells of rose petals.

>examine cat
It's marmalade coloured. It purrs furiously. It smells slightly musky. You can feel your allergies returning already.

>eat the button
The button does not appear to be edible.

>put lipstick on the cat
There’s no good surface on the cat.

>put lipstick on the cats lips
The word “cats” is not necessary in this story.

(If this was an accidental misspelling, you can correct it by typing OOPS followed by the corrected word now. Any time the story points out an unknown word, you can correct a misspelling using OOPS as your next command.)

>put lipstick on
That isn’t something you can wear.

>put lipstick on my lips
The word “lips” is not necessary in this story.

>kiss the cat
You give the cat an affection kiss.

>kiss the cat with lipstick
That isn't something you can kiss.

>hit the cat
You cannot attack that.

>fuck the cat
You don't know how to fuck that.

>fuck the cactusopener
You don't know how to fuck that.

>examine cactusopener
It looks pretty much like a regular can-opener. It creaks slightly as you pick it up to inspect. It has a certain florid aroma.

>use the cactusopener on the cat
The word “use” is not necessary in this story.

>fuck the cat with the cactusopener
Anticipating a glorious bloody mess, you decided to do some fucking with the cactusopener. The cat miaows uncomfortably as you fuck it.

>open the can with the cactusopener
The word “can” is not necessary in this story.

>open the cat with the cactusopener
You attach the cactusopener and begin to slowly twist the handle. You are an ardent anti-vivisectionist. You have no interest in this.

>kiss the cactusopener
With great deliberation, you press your lips to the cactusopener. You can feel the spines penetrating your delicate skin, as rivulets of blood trickle down your chin.

>look around
The Site
You stand in a room. You are not alone. There are other entities here. You wonder what you should do.

You see a cat, a cactusopener, a button, and a lipstick here.

>fuck the cat
You don't know how to fuck that.

>fuck the cat with the button
That doesn't look very useful at fucking things.

>fuck myself with the button
[Runtime error: invalid index operation - this type of value cannot be indexed]

>go to sleep
You see no sleep here.

>sit down
(on the floor)
Okay, you’re now sitting on the floor.

>talk to the cat
You cannot talk to that.

>jump
(first standing up)
You jump a little, and land back where you started.

>sit down on the cat
That isn’t something you can sit on.


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