Have you ever caught yourself saying “why?” out loud while watching a film? Have you ever been so dumbfounded by the decisions made by the characters on screen or the crew behind the camera that the word just slips past your lips, a brutally honest subconscious reaction to the ridiculousness of what you are watching.

Part of what makes a movie good is the sense of realism they can achieve. When you become immersed in the story, the world, the characters, they have succeeded at creating a worthwhile film. So, why then, does a movie that achieves literally none of that deserve any of our time?

One reason would be when someone tries his best to create something good, only to fail spectacularly in an amazing example of poor direction, poor writing, poor acting, and poor editing. This is Neil Breen’s 'Fateful Findings’ in a nutshell.

From the very opening scene we are met with questions. What? Why? What was the point of that? *But don’t expect any of these questions to be answered. They’re a helpless coping mechanism to distract ourselves from the onslaught of bad decisions we witness throughout this film. To name a few…*

Why does this mushroom turn into a box? Why do these kids look like they’ve never waved before in their life? Why is it implied that these two are talking on the phone but one of them doesn’t say a word? Why does he get hit by a car and the driver patiently waits inside? What’s the cube for? What’s the cube for? Who’s this guy? Shouldn’t those tubes be in his nose? Why does the doctor look into the camera when you could’ve cut the scene literally 2 fucking seconds earlier to avoid this problem!? *sigh* I know this is a lot to take in, and unfortunately, this is only 10 minutes into the almost 2 hour long feature film.

This is a movie that you have to experience yourself. Put it on with a group of friends, pour some drinks, and take a shot every time you see one of these tropes: Unexplained disappearing feet. Somebody dropping something. Unnecessary nudity. Violence against laptops. *coffee spill scene* By the end of the movie, you will have most likely gone through the entire bottle.

Nothing in this movie makes sense. Every single scene is questionable. It’s like a train wreck that you can’t help but stare at.