MG roulette (blue slime)

They are joking right? Did I get a dud prize or something? Maybe it was my punishment for not reading that manual.

Those where my thoughts as a looked at the result.

*BLUE SLIME*

A slime... really?

My little neighbourhood had changed over the last few months and I only needed to look outside my window to see the proof that this “game” was real. My neighbour's garden now had a giant flower in it and inside was a green skinned woman who looked like she was fused with the thing. If that wasn't weird enough I'm sure the man sleeps inside with her every night, the guy must love nectar baths.

The house opposite mine now had a “perching station” on its roof and has been a meeting place for various bird women. I even had a decent conversation with some of them. Its actually how I herd about thee game, though how its classified as a game is beyond me.

The older generation in the area have tried to downplay the weird place it was becoming, some going as far as to deny the existence of these girls, my mother included.

So I was kind in a `no harm done` mood, when I found the email.

But a slime...

Right up there with a goblins and large rats as the `starter punching bag` of RPG's, a simple blue blob of not-really-a-threat. Why a am I stuck with a pile of goop while some other lucky bastard is hanging out with a dragon lady or even one of those demons?

Actually scratch that about the demons, I'm sick of religion and those nuns and their fallen god can stuff it. The less said about that one goat girl, the better.

Ah well, I decided to just wait until this apparently female slime got here. The sun was baking today so I move to the kitchen to get myself some water, my mind drifted to happy thoughts as I poured out a jug full and got some in a glass to treat myself To a nice cold glass of sapphire blue wate-

Wait.

The glass isn't tinted and last time I checked water that came out the tap isn't blue.

I put the glass and jug down and poured more of the stuff out in to other containers. All of it was the same, thick, blue and semi clear. After about 5 buckets of the the stuff regular water started flowing again. Leaving me with a kitchen packed with containers for the stuff.

I was annoyed as I looked a the original glass, was this my slime? Really? I felt like I had been pranked as I starting to poke my finger in the glass, it was somewhat sticky compared to before. it isn't even sentient! Why did I get such...a...thing...

My thoughts slowed to a halt to a halt as the slime in the glass had wrapped itself around my finger and pulled it self up my arm, I had been in such a minor rage that I hadn't even noticed it? Until it was on my wrist.

As if reacting to my pause the material on my wrist stopped its advance. After a few seconds of dead silence the it started to move again, regardless of my staring at it.

With a yelp of surprise I started shaking my arm like a madman in order to get it off me and eventually I was successful when the goop fell to the floor with a splat. I stared having no idea what to do. That was until it starting to give out a small humming sound.

I never thought I would see a scene like this in real life, all the slime I had gathers started to crawl out of there containers, I back up to watch as each bucket was emptied out and each lump of goo crawled slowly to the piece I had thrown from my arm witch was absorbing it all and increasing in volume.

As the slime was literally pulling itself together I sat there scared, here we have a creature I think I just injured or at least shown hostility towards and its forming like the god-dammed T-1000, I swear if this thing forms a guy in a cop suit I'm jumping out the window.

The slime had finished becoming whole and was now a bug lump in the middle of my kitchens open floor, shaking like jelly. I took a curious step forward and then took it back as a woman's head and shoulders rose out of it. Oh yeah... it is meat to be female, still not trusting it though.

Her face looked young as far as I could tell, she had hair (or at least what looked like hair) flowing town her back, I do mean flowing, it was like looking a waterfall of oil. She certainly stopped looking like a  RPG punching bag, to me she looked pretty (as fare as a woman made out of liquid was capable of being).

Clear blue eyes opened up to stare at me with almost childlike curiosity as the body almost fully formed with the exception of the legs witch where part of her...base? I did budge a inch and just stared back at here, party of me still hooked on the terminator thing and another part amazed at the fact that I could look her in the eye and thought the back of the head, like a living Ice statue.

Well might as well see if she can talk and get some kind of ball rolling. “Um... hello?”

The slime blinked a few times (Her eyelids cover her eyes but I can still see through her head, how does that work?) before a smile spread across its face.

“Hi~” the voice was drawled out like she was sleepy or drunk but hey its a start.

“Do you have a name?”

“Um...I'm not sure.” she said. What? How can you not be sure if you ave a name or not? She didn't seem to care about my confusion and carried on. “Did you push the button?”

“You mean the game right?”

The slime's face took on a look like it was trying to think hard before she replied “I don't know, the funny blue man told me to ask. After that I ended up in a dark place before here”

I'm guessing that the `funny blue man` was 3M and the dark place was my plumbing, but how did she end up there? The magician didn't strike me as cruel. Never mind, its a question for later.

“In that case yes I did push the button.”

Like a light switch her eyes glazed over and she started moving towards me with a dreamy smile on her face. “Yay!” She cried out as she approached. “My human!”

“Wait! Hold on! your what?” I said as I stepped back only to realise I was against the wall.

“The funny man told me that I'd get my own human if I agreed.” the slime said as she flowed forward. “He said a lot of other things but I didn't listen, thinking makes me hungry.”

I was distracted by trying to make logical sense of that to not realise that she was at arms length away from me. Thinking fast I put my hands on her shoulders in order to push her away but my hands ended up sinking into them. I felt a weird kind of restriction around my arms as she shivered with happiness.

“Feels so nice.” the slime almost sang out as she lifted her arms up and they morphed around my own. The was a weird draining sensation that numbed the nerves and the growing pleasant feeling was stopping me from attempting to pull them out. I drifted into a half daze as we just kinda stood there, my arms in hers.

After a minuted or town in that the she pulled a way with a satisfied smile and I slumped down to the floor with my back still against the wall. My arms felt weird, they where dry, it was a hot day and I know I got seriously clammy but it felt and looked like all my sweat on my arms was gone. this sensation felt weird, it was like drying myself after a shower, and if felt just as good.

“Tasty” the slime said to herself.

“What? What do you mean?” I said questioningly

“You're a nice man.” the slime spoke as if I didn't say any thing. “Mummy made me remember that nice men offer snacks.”

Okay, that meant only one thing, she just used my arm sweat as nourishment. Weird thing that she's capable of, but I can ask about how and or why later. Hold on, offer? “I didn't offer any thing” I spoke in confusion.

“Yes you did, you put your arms up.” Was her simple reply.

I had to admit. Her simple way of thinking had  charm to it. Granted she just used me to `eat` without me even knowing that's what she was doing. But in her head she was offered food and considered me a nice guy for it.

The slime poked my chest to get my attention. “Um... nice man?” she said nervously

I found it cute that nice man was my name according to her. “What is it?”

“Who's that lady?”

I had no idea what she- oh.

Looking through the lime instead of at her (I'm sure there's something meaningful about that) I saw my mother staring at me. She was anything but happy.

“Hi mum, I was just.”

“Don't you dare `hi mum` me!” she almost roared in anger. “What is that and why is it in our house?”

The slime turned back to me and pulled me in to a hug while shivering in fright. I on the other hand was uncased by vibrating jelly up to my neck which topped the feeling in my arms as strangest sensation ever.

Half cowering under my mothers `talk or I break you` stare I cleared my throat. “She, mother, is a blue slime, she's my result from the roulette game. Her name is...” oh right, he she didn't give her name. “Even she doesn't know.”

I could see the blood flow through that vein on her fore head as he right eye look like it fall out from all the twitching. “You've also used the damn e-mail!? I cant believe this! I just had to listen to my work college's son was now `adopted` some girl with goat horns and feet as a little sister  and now you're doing thing with one that barely looks human. I raised you to me a proper man.”

Oh great, mothers rant mode, how I missed you. On a side note I might know that goat girl.

She carried on while pointing at the slime. “She has to go, we are not our neighbour with that insult to plants and we are not that bird house across the street. If anyone is going to be a normal family it's going to be us.”

The slime looked more confused then scared “Go?” she asked in her still slow way of speaking.

“Yes go, I don't care how you got here, but I wand you to unhand my son and show you self out the door!”

The slime's grip on me tightened as her eyes widened in understanding “No, please! No take me away from nice man!” her eyes where watering, that should not be possible. Again, questions for later.

“Sorry buy your going to have to fine another `nice man`”

“But Mummy said you should only have one nice man” she said as she rubbed my face with her hand, unconsciously taking the sweat from my cheek. “I want this nice man, he's kind offered me a snacks”

“I'm sure other people could offer better snacks.”

“No! He's taste the best to me!”

Liked be living liquid because of my sweat, it made scene if you thought about it, after all body fluid means something else for her.

I could see my mother's anger deflating with each reply the slime made, it was like talking to a child. Her reasons to stay with me where simple. But the honesty that came with them made me feel warm, you know what? Screw it. I take bake what I said earlier, you can keep your dragons, this slime is mine!

“Mum, I want to keep her.” it was like I had a stray puppy, granted a puppy that's clear blue and has a malleable form but still.
“Did you not hear me just now?” that vein was returning.

“You said you raised me to be a proper man. Part of that means I make my own decisions, and even though I've just met her, I've kinda grown fond of her already. Besides who cares about being normal?”

“What would your father think?”

“Dad's employed a Kracken and a Minotaur for his labour force, I don't think he'll care that much.”

“He what!?” my mother face took on a expression that read pure violence be fore it look like it reset to a more neutral expression. “Fine, I give up! You have to take care of her and keep her out of trouble, my god its like you brought in a stray puppy.”

“My thoughts exactly.” I said with laugh.

“Whatever, I don't want to deal with with any more. What I do need right now is a strong drink.” my mum removed herself from the conversation and walked to the fridge.

With me laughing the slime once more looked confused. “Do I sill have to go?” she asked with worry.

I stroked her head...or tried to, it was kinda sticky. “Not at all, you can stay.”

While the slime was happy, she looked like she was already on to more important things “Does that mean I can have a meal?”

A meal? She's hungry again already? I guess she was telling the truth about that thinking thing. Wait I second, if sweat on two arms served as a snack, what would she mean by a full- no, it cant be, it isn't that right?

Oh....son of a-

“Meal? And while were on the topic.” my mum spoke up from by the fridge. “What did she mean by snack? You haven't used anything in here.”

This will not end well.