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Atskadan

Dungeons and Dark Heresy Session 1: Autism Speaks

Atskadan
Jan 26th, 2014
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  1. _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
  2. [8:04:49 PM] Eddie: SHUT UP AXL
  3. [8:04:55 PM] kuristina: axlw hat
  4. [8:05:02 PM] kuristina: what kind of name is axl
  5. [8:05:02 PM] Tristan: (can u nigas ples)
  6. [8:05:03 PM] kuristina: thats gay
  7. [8:05:06 PM] Eddie: (shut up miggles)
  8. [8:05:07 PM] Tristan: (WOWWWWW)
  9. [8:05:18 PM] kuristina: (ur gay)
  10. [8:05:22 PM] Stavo: Alright
  11. [8:05:27 PM] Stavo: Srs bzus in 3
  12. [8:05:30 PM] Eddie: (brackets nigga)
  13. [8:05:33 PM] Stavo: 2
  14. [8:05:34 PM] Tristan: (use the parentheses u stupid foghat)
  15. [8:05:36 PM] kuristina: [nackets brigga]
  16. [8:05:37 PM] Stavo: (1)
  17. [8:05:55 PM] andre 3000: yo lets fucking start faggot
  18. [8:05:59 PM] Stavo: *touches Tristan's pecker*
  19. [8:06:02 PM] kuristina: [USE THE BRACKETS YOU FUCK]
  20. [8:06:10 PM] Stavo: {I'm using these}
  21. [8:06:17 PM] kuristina: [this is like on infestation when you wouldnt fucking use the hive chat]
  22. [8:06:19 PM] Tristan: (You niggas are gonna give me an aneurysm)
  23. [8:06:20 PM] Eddie: (IT DOESN'T MATTER JUST LET TRISTAN FINISH WRITING HOLY JESUS CHRIST)
  24. [8:06:22 PM] andre 3000: .
  25. [8:06:44 PM] Austin Terry: Aye
  26. [8:06:52 PM] Stavo: {Bracket fag}
  27. [8:07:09 PM] Tristan: (We're starting. If you need your character sheets, let me know. Use brackets for out-of-character talk so nobody gets confused)
  28. [8:07:12 PM] Austin Terry: lFuck your bracketsl
  29. [8:07:15 PM] Eddie: (I need my sheet)
  30. [8:07:18 PM | Edited 8:07:20 PM] kuristina: [i want sheet]
  31. [8:07:19 PM] Austin Terry: lI think I dol
  32. [8:07:28 PM] Eddie: (That is really annoying to read, Austin)
  33. [8:07:33 PM] Austin Terry: lYou're welcomel
  34. [8:07:35 PM] Stavo: {Yeah}
  35. [8:07:52 PM] kuristina: [austin im gonna shove my hand so far up your ass that ill pull your eyes out by their little veiny things attaching them to the brain]
  36. [8:08:00 PM] Austin Terry: lCopyl
  37. [8:08:04 PM] andre 3000: -mhmhmhmhm-
  38. [8:08:21 PM] Stavo: {So how do we start this}
  39. [8:08:34 PM] andre 3000: i put on my robe and wizard hat
  40. [8:08:42 PM] Stavo: I drink my beer
  41. [8:08:51 PM] Tristan: You wake up in a smelly, rickety wagon, with little to no sunlight making its way through the thick wooden walls. You're bound in chains that are hooked into the wall, and aside from a pounding headache and a brief memory of someone hitting you with a blunt object, you have no idea how you got here.
  42. [8:08:54 PM] Austin Terry: I stick my hand deepah and deepah
  43. [8:09:04 PM] kuristina: [is this skyrim]
  44. [8:09:26 PM] andre 3000: [is this all of us or wat]
  45. [8:09:28 PM] Stavo: {Roll to bite through chain with my grill}
  46. [8:10:08 PM] Austin Terry: {Roll to read a book}
  47. [8:10:36 PM] Tristan: You look around and, in the very minimal amount of light, notice you are not alone in the wagon. There is a haggard-looking, bearded young black human, a very angry dwarf with a beard past his knees and a very serious scar, a very muscled man who looks as if he belongs in a circus with a thick handlebar mustache, a short man in torn brown pants with a robe reading "I Love Books," and what may or may not be a pirate.
  48. [8:10:56 PM] Tristan: You figure you might as well introduce yourselves to one another.
  49. [8:11:13 PM] kuristina: [who the hell am i]
  50. [8:11:22 PM] Stavo: {lol'd}
  51. [8:11:23 PM] Tristan: (The pirate, I think)
  52. [8:11:29 PM] Tristan: (I don't know how to describe your nigga)
  53. [8:11:32 PM] Tristan: (You didn't really say)
  54. [8:11:52 PM] kuristina: [hes got blue spiky hair]
  55. [8:12:02 PM] andre 3000: roll to introduce myself with as many words as my brain can muster
  56. [8:12:02 PM] Stavo: {HELLO?}
  57. [8:12:07 PM] Tristan: (are you really going to play as kamina)
  58. [8:12:13 PM] kuristina: [no im simon]
  59. [8:12:16 PM] andre 3000: [miggles is that guy]
  60. [8:12:17 PM] Tristan: (mor lik semen)
  61. [8:12:23 PM] Eddie: The Dwarf sighs and looks even angrier than usual.
  62. [8:12:25 PM] kuristina: [kamina doesnt have spiral power you nutsack]
  63. [8:12:36 PM] Tristan: (Roll 1d100, Dannos.)
  64. [8:12:40 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  65. [8:12:40 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  66. 31
  67. [8:12:53 PM] andre 3000: did i fucking fail
  68. [8:12:58 PM] Eddie: (BRACK ETS
  69. [8:12:59 PM] Tristan: The strongman looks as if he wants to say something, but simply wiggles his mustache and drools on the floor.
  70. [8:12:59 PM] Eddie: )
  71. [8:13:06 PM] kuristina: [lmfao]
  72. [8:13:13 PM] Stavo: ...
  73. [8:13:16 PM] Tristan: (You're literally so stupid you don't know how to say hi)
  74. [8:13:19 PM] Tristan: (Good job)
  75. [8:13:30 PM] andre 3000: [lol'd]
  76. [8:13:30 PM] Austin Terry: Roll to say something philosophical, but irrelevant
  77. [8:13:31 PM] kuristina: [we can just say what we want to say right, we dont have to roll2talk?]
  78. [8:13:33 PM] Stavo: {Roll to break an arm free}
  79. [8:13:39 PM] Tristan: (Roll 1d100, Austin)
  80. [8:13:39 PM] Eddie: The Dwarf gets even angrier as he accidentally steps in mustache-drool.
  81. [8:13:44 PM] Tristan: (Just type //1d100)
  82. [8:13:51 PM] Austin Terry: //1d100
  83. [8:13:52 PM] Tristan: narkdom rolled 1d100; result:
  84. 17
  85. [8:13:57 PM] Austin Terry: (Fuck)
  86. [8:14:09 PM] kuristina: [do we have to roll to talk]
  87. [8:14:12 PM] andre 3000: [are you dumb as well]
  88. [8:14:14 PM] Tristan: (You wanna try to roll under whatever stat you're rolling for, in this case, Intelligence)
  89. [8:14:25 PM] Tristan: (No, you really don't Miggles. Unless you're Dannos, who is dumb.)
  90. [8:14:28 PM] andre 3000: :-)
  91. [8:14:38 PM] Tristan: (You succeeded, by the way.)
  92. [8:14:38 PM] Austin Terry: (My intelligence is as high as I can make it)
  93. [8:14:50 PM] Austin Terry: (I got under 33, excellent)
  94. [8:14:53 PM] Tristan: (The lower you roll, damage being the exception, the better.)
  95. [8:15:13 PM] Stavo: Skips introductions and {rolls to break an arm free}
  96. [8:15:17 PM] Tristan: (Wait, Dillon, did you roll too?)
  97. [8:15:23 PM] Tristan: (Roll, nigra)
  98. [8:15:26 PM] kuristina: Give the strongman a weird look and say, "Hello, men. My name is Thelis. What are yours?"
  99. [8:15:27 PM] Stavo: {Is it 100 errytime?}
  100. [8:15:37 PM] Tristan: (Unless I say otherwise, ye)
  101. [8:15:47 PM] Stavo: //1d100
  102. [8:15:47 PM] Tristan: kingofnothing44 rolled 1d100; result:
  103. 64
  104. [8:15:52 PM] Tristan: (HA)
  105. [8:16:04 PM] andre 3000: [roll to tell him "Name Warden."]
  106. [8:16:05 PM] Tristan: The black man wiggles around a little, trying to break free, before tiring out and sighing.
  107. [8:16:07 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  108. [8:16:07 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  109. 97
  110. [8:16:10 PM] andre 3000: mfw
  111. [8:16:11 PM] Tristan: (OH BOY)
  112. [8:16:14 PM] Tristan: (FIRST CRITICAL FAILURE)
  113. [8:16:20 PM] Eddie: The Dwarf turns to the butt-pirate and gets even angrier.
  114. [8:16:26 PM] Tristan: (Anything above a 95 is a critical failure, which is code for "Really, really bad.")
  115. [8:16:30 PM] Eddie: Only one syllable comes out of his mouth.
  116. [8:16:31 PM] Eddie: "Tode."
  117. [8:16:34 PM] andre 3000: [jsut tell me what i did]
  118. [8:16:51 PM] Austin Terry: (Don't you like automatically die if you get a 100?)
  119. [8:16:55 PM] Stavo: "Don't worry about it. Lets just get out of here."
  120. [8:17:02 PM] Tristan: The strongman tries to gurgle out some words, but his eyes suddenly go wide as his jaw drops and a thick wave of vomit escapes from his mouth.
  121. [8:17:21 PM] kuristina: "Hello, Tode." Thelis makes a move to shake Tode's hand, but struggles in his shackles. He suddenly realizes he's in shackles.
  122. [8:17:24 PM] Tristan: It lands on the pirate, now known as Thelis', shoes.
  123. [8:17:34 PM] Austin Terry: "You see children, these are the chains that bound us to society. To break these chains, we must remove ourselves from the norm."
  124. [8:17:36 PM] Eddie: The motion makes Tode even angrier.
  125. [8:17:43 PM] kuristina: Stare at the vomit, then at the strongman.
  126. [8:17:48 PM] kuristina: "Do you have a problem?"
  127. [8:17:52 PM] andre 3000: [roll to apologize]
  128. [8:17:55 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  129. [8:17:55 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  130. 56
  131. [8:17:59 PM] Tristan: (This is amazing.)
  132. [8:18:04 PM] andre 3000: [hhnnfnff]
  133. [8:18:12 PM] Tristan: The strongman burps, then frowns.
  134. [8:18:18 PM] andre 3000: lolling
  135. [8:18:20 PM] Austin Terry: (Has Andre been able to speak? With the exception of "Tode".)
  136. [8:18:28 PM] Tristan: (Tode was Eddie.)
  137. [8:18:31 PM] andre 3000: .
  138. [8:18:33 PM] Eddie: (That was me, Autism)
  139. [8:18:35 PM] kuristina: [eddie is tode, andre is strongman]
  140. [8:18:35 PM] Tristan: (Andre hasn't said a single word yet)
  141. [8:18:46 PM] andre 3000: [roll to stand up and break free of the cuffs]
  142. [8:18:49 PM] Austin Terry: (You're me, Edd)
  143. [8:18:52 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  144. [8:18:52 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  145. 38
  146. [8:19:03 PM] kuristina: Willpower roll to break free of shackles.
  147. [8:19:06 PM] kuristina: //d100
  148. [8:19:06 PM] Tristan: migglecraft rolled 1d100; result:
  149. 84
  150. [8:19:15 PM] Eddie: Tode gets evenangrier and begins to shake. He's trying to break through his shackles.
  151. [8:19:29 PM] Eddie: (WHAT)
  152. [8:19:30 PM] Tristan: The strongman, caked in layers of vomit and sweat, effortlessly frees himself of shackles, grinning stupidly. Thelis worms himself around in his shackles, still bound.
  153. [8:19:30 PM] Eddie: //d100
  154. [8:19:31 PM] Tristan: live:eddiawesome rolled 1d100; result:
  155. 17
  156. [8:19:35 PM] Eddie: (I DID IT)
  157. [8:19:39 PM] Stavo: "Hey buddy, let me out of here. Cmon, right over here."
  158. [8:19:52 PM] Stavo: {roll to persuade dumbo}
  159. [8:19:55 PM] Tristan: At this point, the wagon stops moving, just as Tode shatters his cuffs.
  160. [8:20:03 PM] Eddie: "RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!"
  161. [8:20:05 PM] Tristan: (You don't have to roll to persuade other players nigga)
  162. [8:20:11 PM] kuristina: Repeat action to free self of cuffs.
  163. [8:20:13 PM] kuristina: //d100
  164. [8:20:13 PM] Tristan: migglecraft rolled 1d100; result:
  165. 91
  166. [8:20:14 PM] Tristan: (Unless they hate you or something)
  167. [8:20:17 PM] kuristina: [shit]
  168. [8:20:17 PM] Stavo: {But he's retarded]
  169. [8:20:23 PM] Tristan: (and?)
  170. [8:20:30 PM] Eddie: (eventually you're gonna get a 100 and snap your arms off, miggle)
  171. [8:20:36 PM] andre 3000: [roll to grab stavo's guy and yank him free]
  172. [8:20:37 PM] Tristan: Thelis shakes around in his cuffs again, obviously frustrated.
  173. [8:20:38 PM] kuristina: [shut up ede]
  174. [8:20:38 PM] Stavo: {nvm}
  175. [8:20:39 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  176. [8:20:39 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  177. 88
  178. [8:20:43 PM] Tristan: (AHAHAHAHA)
  179. [8:21:02 PM] kuristina: "God damn it! Why can't I get out of these shackles!"
  180. [8:21:02 PM] Tristan: The strongman yanks at Stavo's shackles, literally yanking his chain, to no avail.
  181. [8:21:03 PM] Stavo: {hey lets calm down and let Trisha type for a bit}
  182. [8:21:05 PM] kuristina: Give up and patiently wait.
  183. [8:21:28 PM] andre 3000: [roll again to try and introduce myself]
  184. [8:21:29 PM] Eddie: (Nobody cares that I BROKE THESE CUFFS)
  185. [8:21:29 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  186. [8:21:30 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  187. 3
  188. [8:21:31 PM] andre 3000: omf
  189. [8:21:46 PM] Austin Terry: Andre Meddle begins to be fed up with the shackles, as they stop him from reading his favorite book,"The Scarface Letter" And attempts to break the cuffs
  190. {Roll to break these got dang cuffs}
  191. [8:21:47 PM] Eddie: (>tfw I did the exact same thing in nuke heresy)
  192. [8:21:59 PM] Tristan: "UNGH," the strongman grimaces, the act of speaking obviously putting some mental strain on him. "NAME WARDEN."
  193. [8:22:14 PM] kuristina: "..Hello, Warden."
  194. [8:22:27 PM] Tristan: (You gotta roll, Austin.)
  195. [8:22:32 PM] Eddie: "I broke me cuffs."
  196. [8:22:34 PM] Austin Terry: {I know what I gotta do, faggot"
  197. [8:22:35 PM] Tristan: (ARE YOU NIGGAS ENJOYING YOSELVES)
  198. [8:22:38 PM] Tristan: (do u wana go m8)
  199. [8:22:39 PM] andre 3000: [yes]
  200. [8:22:39 PM] kuristina: [ye]
  201. [8:22:43 PM] andre 3000: [roll to grab the pansy pirate and break his cuffs]
  202. [8:22:43 PM] Austin Terry: //1d100
  203. [8:22:43 PM] Tristan: narkdom rolled 1d100; result:
  204. 79
  205. [8:22:45 PM] Austin Terry: (FUCK)
  206. [8:22:47 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  207. [8:22:47 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  208. 99
  209. [8:22:49 PM] andre 3000: MFW
  210. [8:22:54 PM] Eddie: "They're shattered into a million pieces on the ground."
  211. [8:22:55 PM] Stavo: {im fapping to this}
  212. [8:23:00 PM] Tristan: (hot)
  213. [8:23:01 PM] Austin Terry: {Copy}
  214. [8:23:05 PM] kuristina: [danos youre gonna kill me]
  215. [8:23:11 PM] andre 3000: [HAHAHAH]
  216. [8:23:17 PM] Austin Terry: "Can you undo mine? I'm going through reading withdrawals."
  217. [8:23:20 PM] Stavo: "..."
  218. [8:23:23 PM] andre 3000: [2 fucking critical rolls gad damn]
  219. [8:23:28 PM] Tristan: The strongman grabs Thelis by his vomit-covered, smelly boots, and gives one big tard-strength tug.
  220. [8:23:39 PM] kuristina: "Agh!"
  221. [8:23:39 PM] Tristan: (Let me roll for damage on Miggles)
  222. [8:23:57 PM] andre 3000: [MFW I OHKO MIGGLES 5 MINUTES IN]
  223. [8:24:01 PM] Tristan: //1d5+2
  224. [8:24:01 PM] Tristan: frowningmaccus rolled 1d 5; result:
  225. 5 +2
  226. Sum: 7
  227. [8:24:06 PM] Eddie: (JESUS)
  228. [8:24:06 PM] Austin Terry: {AHAHAHAH}
  229. [8:24:13 PM] Austin Terry: {WELL MIGGLES IS FUCKING DEAD"
  230. [8:24:17 PM] Austin Terry: }
  231. [8:24:24 PM] Tristan: (His jacket absorbs 3 points of that)
  232. [8:24:31 PM] kuristina: ROLL TO NOT DIE
  233. [8:24:35 PM] Tristan: (So Miggles is now at 8 Wounds)
  234. [8:24:38 PM] Tristan: (Which is still okay.)
  235. [8:24:52 PM] kuristina: [how much is 8]
  236. [8:25:00 PM] Austin Terry: {8}
  237. [8:25:06 PM] kuristina: [fuk u]
  238. [8:25:08 PM] Eddie: (Uh, it's one more than 7, one less than 9?)
  239. [8:25:22 PM] kuristina: [i have 4 hp left]
  240. [8:25:24 PM] Tristan: The strongman still continues to pull, despite Thelis's increasingly-frantic protests and a small cracking noise that may or may not be important, before the wagon begins to tip over.
  241. [8:25:30 PM] Tristan: (No, you have 8 HP left)
  242. [8:25:33 PM] Eddie: (No, you have 8)
  243. [8:25:34 PM] Tristan: (You LOST 4 HP)
  244. [8:25:35 PM] Eddie: (Dumbass)
  245. [8:25:37 PM] kuristina: [the fuck]
  246. [8:25:38 PM] Tristan: (Wounds = HP)
  247. [8:25:40 PM] andre 3000: [how does HP work in this game?]
  248. [8:25:41 PM] kuristina: [thats backwarsd]
  249. [8:25:44 PM] Tristan: (It is.)
  250. [8:25:48 PM] Eddie: (It's just wounds?)
  251. [8:25:49 PM] andre 3000: [oh so i have 10 wounds... so 10 hp?]
  252. [8:25:50 PM] Stavo: "Keep doing that, dumbo!"
  253. [8:25:56 PM] Stavo: "Keep that up!"
  254. [8:26:01 PM] kuristina: [ >i have more hp than dannos]
  255. [8:26:02 PM] Tristan: The wagon rolls for a bit, and through the commotion, you hear shouting, and a few loud thundering noises.
  256. [8:26:02 PM] Austin Terry: "Books!"
  257. [8:26:11 PM] andre 3000: [should i like buff my hp or something]
  258. [8:26:12 PM] kuristina: "STOP!"
  259. [8:26:22 PM] andre 3000: [roll to continue pulling, oblivous]
  260. [8:26:23 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  261. 60 +0
  262. Sum: 60
  263. [8:26:24 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  264. [8:26:28 PM] Eddie: Tode grabs at Andre's shackles and tries to break them.
  265. [8:26:29 PM] Stavo: "Keep it up, its tipping the wagon! We might just break this thing!"
  266. [8:26:32 PM] Eddie: //d100
  267. [8:26:32 PM] Tristan: live:eddiawesome rolled 1d100; result:
  268. 89 +0
  269. Sum: 89
  270. [8:27:21 PM] Tristan: The wagon, now on its side, finally comes to a stop, as Strongman releases Thelis's ankles. A large crate, stored on a shelf on the ceiling, dislodges itself and falls to the ground, popping open, revealing your weapons, and in some cases, books.
  271. [8:27:23 PM] Eddie: (be right back)
  272. [8:27:34 PM] Tristan: Tode grunts and tries to pull Thelis free, to no avail.
  273. [8:27:51 PM] Austin Terry: "NO! MY BOOKS!'
  274. [8:27:55 PM] kuristina: Repeat action to free self, using willpower.
  275. [8:27:57 PM] Tristan: The shouting is becoming more intense outside, and you hear what appears to be a swordfight.
  276. [8:27:57 PM] kuristina: //d100
  277. [8:27:57 PM] Tristan: migglecraft rolled 1d100; result:
  278. 94 +0
  279. Sum: 94
  280. [8:28:01 PM] kuristina: OH SHIT
  281. [8:28:02 PM] Austin Terry: "THAT WAS AN ORIGINAL COPY OF DANTE'S INFERNO!"
  282. [8:28:10 PM] kuristina: [>1 under crit fail]
  283. [8:28:11 PM] Stavo: Stavo now being suspended, i try to break free again. //d100
  284. [8:28:13 PM] Tristan: Before too long, however, you hear a squishy sound, and the shouting stops.
  285. [8:28:19 PM] Stavo: //d100
  286. [8:28:19 PM] Tristan: kingofnothing44 rolled 1d100; result:
  287. 86 +0
  288. Sum: 86
  289. [8:28:41 PM] Tristan: (I am so drawing the party for this in Bickham's.)
  290. [8:28:48 PM] Austin Terry: Meddle, in complete rage, tries to break free once more to go for the books.
  291. [8:28:49 PM] Stavo: {Ben}
  292. [8:28:52 PM] Austin Terry: //d100
  293. [8:28:52 PM] Tristan: narkdom rolled 1d100; result:
  294. 21 +0
  295. Sum: 21
  296. [8:28:57 PM] Austin Terry: {Fuck yes}
  297. [8:29:04 PM] Austin Terry: {You're gonna draw Medlin again?}
  298. [8:29:24 PM] Tristan: Medldle, sporting a big blue vein in his forehead and slightly foaming at the mouth, slams his cuffs together and breaks them as if they were IKEA furniture.
  299. [8:29:35 PM] Stavo: "Yo bookworm, you help me out of here, I got a fresh novel for you"
  300. [8:29:40 PM] kuristina: "Holy shit!"
  301. [8:29:45 PM] andre 3000: [ummmmmm ikea furniture???? ummm my immersion]
  302. [8:29:53 PM] kuristina: [fuck you dannos hes narrating]
  303. [8:29:57 PM] Tristan: (IKEA furniture exists in this setting wow nerd read the lore)
  304. [8:29:57 PM] andre 3000: [:-)]
  305. [8:30:09 PM] Austin Terry: "If it's Undaunted Courage, I already have 32 copies."
  306. [8:30:22 PM] Stavo: "Its even more boring than that"
  307. [8:30:31 PM] andre 3000: [do I have to roll to pick up my basic inventory that's on my char cheet]
  308. [8:30:55 PM] Tristan: The back door to the wagon swings open after a metal-plated boot kicks it open, and you see a very large human male in silver armor and a mustache that extends well past the sides of his face standing in the doorway.
  309. [8:30:59 PM] Eddie: (We're prisoners, nigga, what do you think?)
  310. [8:31:07 PM] andre 3000: [do i have to ROLL though.]
  311. [8:31:15 PM] Tristan: (Brah, that's the equipment from when you were abducted. If you're free, you can get it.)
  312. [8:31:20 PM] Austin Terry: "Poisonwood Bible?"
  313. [8:31:24 PM] andre 3000: [i know i have to pick it up, but i was asking if i roll]
  314. [8:31:29 PM] kuristina: [you dont have to roll for really minor shit dude]
  315. [8:31:40 PM] Stavo: "Yeah, yeah" I say in a hurry "The unabriged"
  316. [8:31:57 PM] kuristina: "I had that one at home."
  317. [8:31:58 PM] Eddie: Tode turns to the doorway looking the angriest he has thus far.
  318. [8:32:01 PM] Austin Terry: "Fuck yes!" Meddle screams, attempting to pull off Stavo's chains.
  319. [8:32:03 PM] Austin Terry: //d100
  320. [8:32:03 PM] Tristan: narkdom rolled 1d100; result:
  321. 35 +0
  322. Sum: 35
  323. [8:32:11 PM] Tristan: "You need a hand, gentlemen?" the Knight says, extending a pitch-black metal gauntlet, raising an eyebrow.
  324. [8:32:13 PM] Austin Terry: {;-;}
  325. [8:32:21 PM] kuristina: "I could do with one of those."
  326. [8:32:27 PM] andre 3000: Warden stumbles over to the exposed treasures and takes his hammer, brass knuckles, knife, watch, flask, vest, and dogtags
  327. [8:32:47 PM] Austin Terry: {Hey Tristan, is it possible to use a hardcover copy of Scarlett Letter on enemies}
  328. [8:32:50 PM] Eddie: (THIS IS NOT A 40K SETTING WHY DO YOU HAVE DOGTAGS)
  329. [8:33:02 PM] Tristan: (There's literally rules for improvised weapons)
  330. [8:33:03 PM] andre 3000: [tristan didn't tell me to delete them lmao]
  331. [8:33:05 PM] Stavo: {They are actual tags from dogs}
  332. [8:33:15 PM] Tristan: (I'll count it as a shield, too.)
  333. [8:33:20 PM] Austin Terry: {The only nonimprovised weapon I own is a staff and gun with 6 bullets}
  334. [8:33:25 PM] andre 3000: [>gun]
  335. [8:33:29 PM] kuristina: [no guns]
  336. [8:33:31 PM] andre 3000: [wowwwowowoww]
  337. [8:33:31 PM] Stavo: {We aint doing guns}
  338. [8:33:34 PM] Tristan: (I forgot to replace the gun)
  339. [8:33:36 PM] Tristan: (Woops)
  340. [8:33:42 PM] Austin Terry: "Yes sir, you can get me some reading material."
  341. [8:33:42 PM] Tristan: (#MiddleAges)
  342. [8:33:50 PM] Austin Terry: {YOU'RE middle aged.}
  343. [8:33:59 PM] kuristina: [ownrekpwnd]
  344. [8:34:05 PM] Eddie: Tode walks to the gear and takes his sword and his army-branded jacket.
  345. [8:34:38 PM] kuristina: "Hey, sir knight, think you could undo these shackles?"
  346. [8:34:48 PM] Stavo: "Yo stash, get me out of here"
  347. [8:35:20 PM] andre 3000: Warden stares at the knight for a moment, and then turns away to inspect the surroundings.
  348. [roll perception to check shit out?]
  349. [8:35:27 PM] Tristan: "Sure thing. You know why you're in shackles?" The mustachioed man asks as he brings a very impressive-looking bastard sword across the shackles, breaking them with a loud banging noise.
  350. [8:35:36 PM] kuristina: "Nope."
  351. [8:35:41 PM] Tristan: Stavo drops to the floor, rubbing his wrists, and Thelis is next to be freed.
  352. [8:35:51 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  353. [8:35:51 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  354. 34 +0
  355. Sum: 34
  356. [8:35:53 PM] Eddie: Tode turns to the man and says "Nope."
  357. [8:35:58 PM] andre 3000: [score]
  358. [8:36:24 PM] Austin Terry: "I'm assuming I'm being escorted to teach the over-achieving kids at a local school."
  359. [8:36:35 PM] Stavo: "No idea." Stavo says as he picks up his war axe and grabs the long length of silver chain
  360. [8:36:44 PM] kuristina: "In shackles? To teach kids?"
  361. [8:36:57 PM] kuristina: "What kind of schools do you teach at?"
  362. [8:37:04 PM] kuristina: Thelis raises an eyebrow.
  363. [8:37:06 PM] Eddie: "I think they ought t'have some sort of file on us, yeah?"
  364. [8:37:07 PM] Austin Terry: "They have to make sure I don't sprain my teaching hand."
  365. [8:37:20 PM] kuristina: Thelis frowns.
  366. [8:37:34 PM] Tristan: Warden stares down the knight, noting that he's in some very expensive-looking, finely-crafted armor, sporting yellow-and-green feathers and sleeves, and brandishing a bastard sword the length of his body in both hands with a golden mustache as the hilt. He looks around, noting that the party is in the forest, and absolutely surrounded by corpses, mostly robed men, but one corpse stands out in particular.
  367. [8:37:35 PM] kuristina: "I'm pretty sure a pair of shackles would sprain your hand more than not"
  368. [8:38:20 PM] andre 3000: [roll per to inspect the special snowflake corpse]
  369. [8:38:23 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  370. [8:38:23 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  371. 49 +0
  372. Sum: 49
  373. [8:38:32 PM] andre 3000: [ddddddd]
  374. [8:38:33 PM] Tristan: A giant of an orc, at least eight feet tall, absolutely covered in boils and eyeballs, lays dead behind the knight, its sword carelessly dropped at its feet.
  375. [8:38:50 PM] Stavo: Stavo attempts to walk past Mustachio and get out before anything else happens
  376. [8:38:54 PM] Stavo: //d100
  377. [8:38:56 PM] kuristina: [am i out of my shackles yet]
  378. [8:38:56 PM] Tristan: kingofnothing44 rolled 1d100; result:
  379. 9 +0
  380. Sum: 9
  381. [8:39:06 PM] Stavo: {yeah}
  382. [8:39:19 PM] Eddie: (dis bitch go hard as hell flocka)
  383. [8:39:24 PM] kuristina: Thelis picks up all of his items and equips them.
  384. [8:39:28 PM] andre 3000: [am i mustachio]
  385. [8:39:34 PM] Stavo: {No lol}
  386. [8:39:34 PM] kuristina: [no you fucking idiot]
  387. [8:39:35 PM] Eddie: (no)
  388. [8:39:41 PM] andre 3000: [tristan said i had a mustache]
  389. [8:39:42 PM] Stavo: {Im talking about this big nigga}
  390. [8:39:59 PM] Austin Terry: Meddle locates all of his books and puts him in his stupid looking, brown duffel bag.
  391. [8:40:05 PM] Eddie: (yeah but this guy's defining trait is his mustache, yours is your retardity)
  392. [8:40:11 PM] Stavo: {lol austin}
  393. [8:40:13 PM] kuristina: [^]
  394. [8:40:24 PM] kuristina: [@eddie]
  395. [8:40:32 PM] Tristan: "You've been kidnapped," the knight explains, sheathing his sword. "Nobody's quite sure what's happening, but a lot of magically-gifted folk are dying left-and-right, vanishing, or in the worst cases, transforming into inhuman monsters."
  396. [8:40:48 PM] Eddie: "Magically gifted?"
  397. [8:40:51 PM] Tristan: "And it seems that some of these men were going to use you for some sort of strange mage business."
  398. [8:40:52 PM] Austin Terry: "You mean... people who don't read?"
  399. [8:40:58 PM] Tristan: "...Sure."
  400. [8:41:02 PM] Eddie: " Ah, uh, 'm jus' a dwarf."
  401. [8:41:16 PM] Stavo: {Yo i rolled to leave so get me out of here}
  402. [8:41:18 PM] Tristan: "Who tipped the wagon over?"
  403. [8:41:28 PM] Tristan: (nigga don't leave the rest of the party in the middle of the forest)
  404. [8:41:34 PM] kuristina: Thelis points, aggitatedly, at the Strongman.
  405. [8:41:38 PM] Stavo: {NIGGA I AM JUST STEPPING OUTSIDE}
  406. [8:41:40 PM] kuristina: "He did."
  407. [8:41:43 PM] Tristan: (You ARE outside)
  408. [8:41:58 PM] Stavo: {o}
  409. [8:42:02 PM] andre 3000: Warden stares, confused, and points to himself. "WARDEN."
  410. [8:42:15 PM] Eddie: (you didn't rull to talk autismus)
  411. [8:42:27 PM] andre 3000: [come on i already rolled to say my name dood]
  412. [8:42:31 PM] Austin Terry: "He almost destroyed my book of jokes."
  413. [8:42:41 PM] Tristan: "...Nice," the mustached knight says under his breath, putting his hands on his side. "That was enough of a distraction for me to be able to attack these mages, so thank you, Sir Warden."
  414. [8:42:49 PM] Austin Terry: {I thought you didn't have to"
  415. [8:42:51 PM] Austin Terry: }
  416. [8:42:59 PM] Stavo: {He does cause he's dumb}
  417. [8:43:00 PM] andre 3000: Warden stares at the mustached knight.
  418. [8:43:20 PM] Austin Terry: {SEE EDDIE!?}
  419. [8:43:37 PM] andre 3000: [more like smellie]
  420. [8:43:54 PM] Tristan: "Zachariah, over here," the Knight instructs, as a very short assistant sporting pink robes and a stupid expression comes rushing out of the forest.
  421. [8:43:57 PM] Eddie: (more like andre 3000 dicks in my ass)
  422. [8:44:10 PM] Tristan: "This is stupid, Luigi," the assistant says, scratching his behind.
  423. [8:44:24 PM] andre 3000: [lumflao!]
  424. [8:44:30 PM] Stavo: {Is this nigga Toad}
  425. [8:44:51 PM] kuristina: [oh god now im gonna read everything he says in toads voice]
  426. [8:44:56 PM] Tristan: The Knight instructs the assistant to point the party towards the nearest town, before hastily leaving.
  427. [8:44:58 PM] andre 3000: [^^^^^^^]
  428. [8:45:03 PM] Austin Terry: {They call him Luigi ThisIsSmart.}
  429. [8:45:30 PM] Eddie: (can i have an assistant named Juan)
  430. [8:45:31 PM] kuristina: "Nice goodbye," Thelis mutters.
  431. [8:45:52 PM] Stavo: "Yo, little fairy niggith, what town is that?"
  432. [8:45:55 PM] Tristan: "Just head North, through the path up ahead, but watch out, we spotted a camp of orcs up ahead. Might wanna go around, or you'll get butthurted."
  433. [8:46:00 PM] Stavo: {brb making sammich}
  434. [8:46:16 PM] Stavo: {actually nvm}
  435. [8:46:19 PM] Eddie: "Sod-eth that."
  436. [8:46:25 PM] Eddie: "I want to kill some orcs."
  437. [8:46:26 PM] Tristan: "This is stupid, by the way," Zachariah says, reaching into his pink robes, "But you're going to need some money if you make it," he says, before pulling out a bag of coins.
  438. [8:46:37 PM] Stavo: Stavo grabs the coins
  439. [8:46:40 PM] Tristan: "There's 15 gold in there. That should be enough to buy a place to rest."
  440. [8:46:44 PM] Stavo: All of them, selfishly
  441. [8:46:58 PM] Tristan: "This is SO stupid," Zachariah says, before falling Sir Luigi into the distance, disappearing.
  442. [8:47:05 PM | Edited 8:47:14 PM] kuristina: Thelis grabs the bag that the coins were in and tucks it in his pocket.
  443. [8:47:09 PM] andre 3000: Warden frowns.
  444. [8:47:13 PM] Tristan: (Alright, enough intro, now you guys are in control of which direction you wanna go)
  445. [8:47:15 PM] Stavo: {Nah nigga i got it first}
  446. [8:47:24 PM] kuristina: [no i just grabbed the bag]
  447. [8:47:27 PM] Eddie: Tode unsheathes his sword and sprints to the north.
  448. [8:47:29 PM] Stavo: {Read up}
  449. [8:47:32 PM] kuristina: [you said you took the coins, not the coin bag]
  450. [8:47:33 PM] Tristan: (Stavo was first.)
  451. [8:47:39 PM] kuristina: [HE TOOK THE COINS]
  452. [8:47:41 PM] Stavo: {oh lol}
  453. [8:47:42 PM] kuristina: [NOT THE BAG]
  454. [8:47:46 PM] kuristina: [i just took the bag]
  455. [8:47:51 PM] Tristan: (u shud put th bag on ur hed and smothr urself)
  456. [8:47:57 PM] andre 3000: Warden looks at the midget waddle into the distance, and starts to lumber after him.
  457. [8:48:10 PM] andre 3000: [miggles dont be that guy]
  458. [8:48:14 PM] kuristina: "Wait, you oaf!"
  459. [8:48:25 PM] kuristina: [the bag could be useful]
  460. [8:48:31 PM] Austin Terry: "Before we go, would you guys like to hear a joke?" Meddle begins to smirk, unsheathing a joke book with a red cover from his bag.
  461. [8:48:52 PM] Stavo: "No. Lets get moving."
  462. [8:48:59 PM] kuristina: "No, let's hear it."
  463. [8:49:03 PM] Tristan: (everyone's so mean to meddle ;_;7)
  464. [8:49:10 PM] Austin Terry: {;-;}
  465. [8:49:35 PM] Stavo: Stavo begins to walk up road, the direction that fairy pointed. "You want some food, you follow the man with the money"
  466. [8:49:59 PM] Eddie: You hear a very very angry yell off in the distance. "WHY DID THE IDIOTS NOT CROSS THE PATH TO THE TOWN?"
  467. [8:50:01 PM] kuristina: "I don't need food!" Thelis says, as his stomach begins to growl.
  468. [8:50:12 PM] Austin Terry: "Who needs food when you have books!"
  469. [8:50:17 PM] kuristina: "Yeah!"
  470. [8:50:25 PM] kuristina: "We could eat the books!"
  471. [8:50:28 PM] andre 3000: [roll to scream "EAT BOOKS."]
  472. [8:50:31 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  473. [8:50:31 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  474. 27 +0
  475. Sum: 27
  476. [8:50:34 PM] Austin Terry: "NO"
  477. [8:50:39 PM] Austin Terry: "WE DON'T EAT THE BOOKS!"
  478. [8:51:19 PM] kuristina: "Why not?"
  479. [8:51:33 PM] andre 3000: [tristan pls]
  480. [8:51:41 PM] Austin Terry: "Books are valuable artifacts."
  481. [8:52:27 PM] Tristan: (You failed Andre)
  482. [8:52:39 PM] andre 3000: [fug]
  483. [8:53:21 PM] Stavo: {sorry, bugged out}
  484. [8:53:22 PM] Tristan: The party follows Tode as he leads the way, as the forest seems to drag on forever, the bright green trees swaying in the breeze.
  485. [8:53:55 PM] Stavo: {why is tode leading}
  486. [8:54:00 PM] Stavo: {I thought i was with money}
  487. [8:54:02 PM] andre 3000: [because he took the lead]
  488. [8:54:02 PM] Eddie: (Because I left first?)
  489. [8:54:02 PM] Tristan: Warden grunts with each step, annoyingly trying to figure out how words work, which makes the trip seem even longer, until Tode bumps into something.
  490. [8:54:03 PM] andre 3000: [pussy]
  491. [8:54:07 PM] Stavo: {nigga}
  492. [8:54:30 PM] Stavo: {K i read up}
  493. [8:54:48 PM] Tristan: A caravan lays in the middle of the road, several boxes of cargo lay at the ground, and a medium-sized man with a major underbite, green skin, and dreadlocks sits in front of it, clutching his shoulder.
  494. [8:55:18 PM] Austin Terry: "Excuse me sir, do you have any books?"
  495. [8:55:20 PM] kuristina: [isnt that just an orc]
  496. [8:55:23 PM] Tristan: "They just sacked it," the Orc grunts, "Stole my horse! Can you help, humans? And... dwarf?"
  497. [8:55:27 PM] andre 3000: [roll to scream at this man with willpower]
  498. [8:55:27 PM] Eddie: "Orcs."
  499. [8:55:30 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  500. [8:55:30 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  501. 64 +0
  502. Sum: 64
  503. [8:55:32 PM] Tristan: "Uh... sure? We got books."
  504. [8:55:34 PM] andre 3000: [fak]
  505. [8:55:44 PM] Tristan: Warden yodels. The Orc looks at him, confused.
  506. [8:55:51 PM] Eddie: "How do we know this isn't an ambush, greenskin?
  507. [8:55:56 PM] kuristina: >yodels
  508. [8:55:58 PM] Stavo: "Wait, wait, wait. I've seen this before. It's a setup" Stavo whispers to Tode
  509. [8:56:00 PM] andre 3000: i fucking dying
  510. [8:56:26 PM] Tristan: "It... Aw, hells. Get'em!" The Orc bellows, no longer clutching his arm, but pulling a dagger.
  511. [8:56:46 PM] Tristan: The bushes rustle behind you as two more Orcs pop out, bandannas covering their mouths, brandishing longswords.
  512. [8:56:50 PM] Stavo: "I did a job once witha group of guys, we did this exact same thi-" Stavo attempts to grab orc with cahin around the neck
  513. [8:56:51 PM] kuristina: "A real man wouldn't pull a dirty trick like that!"
  514. [8:56:52 PM] Eddie: Tode rushes at the "injured" orc, sword cocked back.
  515. [8:56:52 PM] Stavo: //d100
  516. [8:56:53 PM] Tristan: kingofnothing44 rolled 1d100; result:
  517. 9 +0
  518. Sum: 9
  519. [8:56:53 PM] Tristan: (Roll 1d100, everyone)
  520. [8:56:58 PM] Eddie: //d100
  521. [8:56:58 PM] Tristan: live:eddiawesome rolled 1d100; result:
  522. 51 +0
  523. Sum: 51
  524. [8:57:02 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  525. [8:57:03 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  526. 70 +0
  527. Sum: 70
  528. [8:57:04 PM] Stavo: {chain*}
  529. [8:57:18 PM] andre 3000: idk why i rolled lol!
  530. [8:57:19 PM] kuristina: Attack an orc with my drill.
  531. [8:57:22 PM] kuristina: //d100
  532. [8:57:23 PM] Austin Terry: Meddle rushes at one of the orcs, prepared to hit him in the had with with a hard cover copy of an unabridged dictionary.
  533. [8:57:26 PM] Austin Terry: //d100
  534. [8:57:28 PM] Tristan: migglecraft rolled 1d100; result:
  535. 71 +0
  536. Sum: 71
  537. [8:57:28 PM] Tristan: narkdom rolled 1d100; result:
  538. 5 +0
  539. Sum: 5
  540. [8:57:32 PM] Austin Terry: {FUCK}
  541. [8:57:34 PM] Austin Terry: {YES}
  542. [8:57:41 PM] andre 3000: Warden turns around and attempts to bust an orc in the face with his brass knucks.
  543. [8:57:43 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  544. [8:57:47 PM] andre 3000: .
  545. [8:57:49 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  546. [8:57:54 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  547. 18 +0
  548. Sum: 18
  549. [8:57:54 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  550. 16 +0
  551. Sum: 16
  552. [8:57:56 PM] andre 3000: o
  553. [8:57:58 PM] Stavo: {aight give trish a chance to describe scene}
  554. [8:58:05 PM] Tristan: (Hold up)
  555. [8:58:06 PM] Eddie: (it lags would you please not do that)
  556. [8:58:10 PM] Tristan: (That was what order to attack in was)
  557. [8:58:14 PM] andre 3000: [i thought it was broken ]
  558. [8:58:24 PM] Tristan: (Austin, Dillon, Eddie, Dannos, then Miggles)
  559. [8:58:32 PM] Eddie: (go austin go)
  560. [8:58:34 PM] Tristan: (Austin, you're up first with the book, aaaand it hits)
  561. [8:58:41 PM] Austin Terry: {A critical, at that}
  562. [8:58:51 PM] Eddie: (roll for damage)
  563. [8:58:52 PM] andre 3000: [how are crits gotten]
  564. [8:58:56 PM] Tristan: (nah, attacks are only critical if you get a 10 with damage)
  565. [8:58:58 PM] Eddie: (improvised weapons do 1d5-1 right)
  566. [8:59:00 PM] andre 3000: [o]
  567. [8:59:02 PM] Austin Terry: {damn}
  568. [8:59:06 PM] Tristan: (Hold on)
  569. [8:59:26 PM] Eddie: (wow i just realized i was set to offline for some reason)]
  570. [8:59:30 PM] Eddie: (wtf lmao)
  571. [8:59:31 PM] kuristina: [yea]
  572. [9:00:09 PM] Tristan: (Since it's a hardcover dictionary and books were GIGANTIC back then)
  573. [9:00:13 PM] Eddie: (elemayo)
  574. [9:00:14 PM] Tristan: (roll 1d10+2, Austin)
  575. [9:00:17 PM] Stavo: {Aight wait till i get back to continue other than battle scene already done, ill brb}
  576. [9:00:23 PM] Austin Terry: //d10+2
  577. [9:00:23 PM] Tristan: narkdom rolled 1d10; result:
  578. 1 +2
  579. Sum: 3
  580. [9:00:28 PM] Tristan: (AHAHAHAHA)
  581. [9:00:31 PM] Austin Terry: {Fuck me}
  582. [9:00:34 PM] Austin Terry: {Fucking shit}
  583. [9:00:37 PM] Stavo: {Unless I need to roll damage first}
  584. [9:00:51 PM | Edited 9:00:53 PM] kuristina: [so if we do rolls with a stat do we subtract/add the stat to the roll?]
  585. [9:00:54 PM] Eddie: (stop doing things dillon)
  586. [9:01:03 PM] Tristan: Meddle smacks one of the bandanna'd orcs across the mouth with the dictionary, and you hear a sickening crack.
  587. [9:01:07 PM] Tristan: (Roll damage Dillon)
  588. [9:01:11 PM] Tristan: (Wait)
  589. [9:01:12 PM] Eddie: (for every tens place in WS/BS/etc you get +1 iirc)
  590. [9:01:13 PM] Stavo: {what is it again?}
  591. [9:01:15 PM] Tristan: (Forgot to add Austin's strength)
  592. [9:01:26 PM] Austin Terry: {Did I just kill an orc with a book?}
  593. [9:01:29 PM] kuristina: [if i did 'Roll willpower to summon a horse' would i do //d100 -4, then?]
  594. [9:01:32 PM] Tristan: (Not quite.)
  595. [9:01:35 PM] Tristan: (You did 5 damage)
  596. [9:01:38 PM] Austin Terry: {Shit}
  597. [9:01:48 PM] Austin Terry: {I'll do 5 damage to your butthole.}
  598. [9:01:59 PM] Tristan: The orc falls into the dirt, grabbing its mouth. It yells something garbled at you, but words tend to not be clear through broken jaws.
  599. [9:02:08 PM] Austin Terry: {FUCK}
  600. [9:02:09 PM] Tristan: (Dillon, what weapon you using?)
  601. [9:02:11 PM] Austin Terry: {WELL, GOOD ENOUGH}
  602. [9:02:14 PM] Stavo: {chain}
  603. [9:02:22 PM] kuristina: [ansur my qestion]
  604. [9:02:24 PM] kuristina: [pls]
  605. [9:02:51 PM] Austin Terry: "To defeat the power of books, you must defeat Shen Long"
  606. [9:03:08 PM] kuristina: "Who?"
  607. [9:03:20 PM] Eddie: "Uncultured."
  608. [9:03:23 PM] Tristan: (Hold on)
  609. [9:03:28 PM] Tristan: (What's your question, Miggles?)
  610. [9:03:34 PM] Tristan: (And roll 1d10-2, Dillon.)
  611. [9:03:34 PM] kuristina: [9:01 PM] kuristina:
  612.  
  613. <<< [if i did 'Roll willpower to summon a horse' would i do //d100 -4, then?]
  614. [9:03:44 PM] Tristan: (>Willpower to summon a horse)
  615. [9:03:44 PM] Stavo: //1d10-2
  616. [9:03:44 PM] Tristan: kingofnothing44 rolled 1d10; result:
  617. 4 +0
  618. Sum: 4
  619. [9:03:51 PM] kuristina: [its an example]
  620. [9:04:11 PM] Tristan: (You don't really need modifier on skill checks)
  621. [9:04:15 PM] Tristan: (It's mostly just for damage)
  622. [9:04:18 PM] kuristina: [since i have 40 wp, eddie said that every 10 of a stat is +/- 1]
  623. [9:04:46 PM] Eddie: (its only for weapons)
  624. [9:04:49 PM] Tristan: Stavo swings his chain around the lead orc's ankle, wrapping it around, and yanks it, pulling him to the ground.
  625. [9:04:49 PM] kuristina: [well i did "Roll with willpower to break out of cuffs" but it didnt change my roll at all]
  626. [9:04:50 PM] Eddie: (er, attacks)
  627. [9:04:58 PM] Tristan: (That's what I mean son)
  628. [9:05:02 PM] Tristan: (It's for damage mostly.)
  629. [9:05:15 PM] kuristina: [how is willpower used for damage]
  630. [9:05:22 PM] Tristan: (It's not)
  631. [9:05:28 PM] kuristina: [then what is it forrrrrrr]
  632. [9:05:38 PM] Eddie: (Absolutely nothing to do with combat.)
  633. [9:05:47 PM] Tristan: (Except MAYBE fighting through extreme pain.)
  634. [9:05:50 PM] kuristina: [for 'stat checks'?]
  635. [9:05:56 PM] Tristan: (Yeah, dude.)
  636. [9:06:01 PM] Tristan: (Eddie's up.)
  637. [9:06:14 PM] Eddie: (Okay)
  638. [9:06:27 PM] Eddie: Tode swings his sword at the Orc with dreadlocks.
  639. [9:06:29 PM] Eddie: //d100
  640. [9:06:52 PM] Tristan: live:eddiawesome rolled 1d100; result:
  641. 47 +0
  642. Sum: 47
  643. [9:07:04 PM] Eddie: (Failed)
  644. [9:07:26 PM] Tristan: Tode swings his sword at the dreadlocked orc, but misses, and plunges it into the dirt beside it.
  645. [9:07:38 PM] Stavo: {so me and eddie are jumping an orc}
  646. [9:07:39 PM] Tristan: (Danno)
  647. [9:07:59 PM] Tristan: (Pretty much)
  648. [9:07:59 PM] andre 3000: [i rolled to punch with brassknucks, got 18]
  649. [9:08:57 PM] Tristan: (Roll 1d10+3)
  650. [9:09:06 PM] andre 3000: //d10+3
  651. [9:09:07 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d10; result:
  652. 10 +3
  653. Sum: 13
  654. [9:09:11 PM] Tristan: (HOLY CRAP)
  655. [9:09:12 PM] andre 3000: B)
  656. [9:09:13 PM] kuristina: [OH FUCK]
  657. [9:09:18 PM] Tristan: (LADIES AND GENTLEMEN WE HAVE OUR FIRST CRITICAL HIT)
  658. [9:09:19 PM] Austin Terry: {JEEESUS}
  659. [9:09:22 PM] Tristan: (Roll another d100)
  660. [9:09:25 PM] kuristina: [tristan please make him punch the orcs head off]
  661. [9:09:27 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  662. [9:09:27 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  663. 51 +0
  664. Sum: 51
  665. [9:09:33 PM] Tristan: (If you get it, you get to roll damage ag- aww.)
  666. [9:09:39 PM] Austin Terry: {No, better yet, have him explode.)
  667. [9:09:54 PM] kuristina: [have him punch his head off and have the head explode]
  668. [9:10:16 PM] andre 3000: [have me punch the head off and have the head implode]
  669. [9:10:31 PM] kuristina: [nigga these aint magical physics brassknuckles]
  670. [9:10:36 PM] andre 3000: [8-)
  671. [9:10:48 PM] Tristan: Warden punches the last standing Orc in the stomach, staggering him, before walking a few steps back, and putting his hand in front of his face. The Orc explodes, sending its head rocketing into the sky, which pops like an overripe, toothy watermelon, showering down blood.
  672. [9:11:10 PM] Austin Terry: {YES}
  673. [9:11:10 PM] Eddie: (you wa shock)
  674. [9:11:13 PM] Austin Terry: {FUCKING. YES}
  675. [9:11:15 PM] kuristina: "JESUS CHRIST!"
  676. [9:11:27 PM] Austin Terry: Meddle looks at the Orc who's head just exploded. "Oi."
  677. [9:11:37 PM] andre 3000: Warden giggles.
  678. [9:11:44 PM] kuristina: [kawaii]
  679. [9:11:56 PM | Edited 9:12:07 PM] Tristan: (Warden and Meddle is my OTP <3333)
  680. [9:12:04 PM] kuristina: [wardlin]
  681. [9:12:42 PM] kuristina: [now what]
  682. [9:12:48 PM] Tristan: (There's still two alive.)
  683. [9:12:51 PM] kuristina: [o]
  684. [9:13:02 PM] Tristan: (The one Medlin chin-checked with the book and the one Stavo chained)
  685. [9:13:03 PM] Austin Terry: "I've seen worse. I read Kilometers Go By"
  686. [9:13:07 PM] Tristan: (And it's Miggles' term)
  687. [9:13:08 PM] Stavo: {One on the ground with me and edders}
  688. [9:14:00 PM] kuristina: Run at the orc that Medlin smashed in the face with my DRILL, THE DRILL THAT WILL PIERCE THE ORC'S CHEST! Maybe.
  689. [9:14:04 PM] kuristina: //d100
  690. [9:14:09 PM] Tristan: migglecraft rolled 1d100; result:
  691. 83 +0
  692. Sum: 83
  693. [9:14:12 PM] kuristina: kuristina cries
  694. [9:14:54 PM] Stavo: Swing my warhammer down on the orc's throat
  695. [9:14:55 PM | Edited 9:15:45 PM] Tristan: Thelis rushes the grounded Orc Meddle clocked with his hardcover dictionary, but overshoots the charge, tripping over the prone orc.
  696. [9:14:56 PM] Stavo: //d100
  697. [9:14:56 PM] Tristan: kingofnothing44 rolled 1d100; result:
  698. 60 +0
  699. Sum: 60
  700. [9:15:06 PM] Tristan: (It ain't your turn bro)
  701. [9:15:16 PM] Tristan: (The NPCs gotta have turns too, y'know)
  702. [9:15:16 PM] Stavo: {I thought miggles was last}
  703. [9:15:21 PM] Stavo: {Gay}
  704. [9:15:28 PM] Stavo: {They should be rag dolls}
  705. [9:16:01 PM] Tristan: The dreadlocked Orc tries to get himself free, swinging his dagger at Stavo's chain.
  706. [9:16:04 PM] Tristan: //1d100
  707. [9:16:04 PM] Tristan: frowningmaccus rolled 1d100; result:
  708. 42 +0
  709. Sum: 42
  710. [9:16:14 PM] Tristan: The dagger bounces off the chain pathetically.
  711. [9:16:27 PM] andre 3000: [ warden.png http://puu.sh/6zCs5.png ]
  712. [9:16:48 PM] Tristan: Meanwhile, Meddle's victim tries to stand up, one hand over his shattered jaw, and the other on his longsword, swinging it towards Medlin.
  713. [9:16:48 PM] Tristan: //1d100
  714. [9:16:49 PM] Tristan: frowningmaccus rolled 1d100; result:
  715. 73 +0
  716. Sum: 73
  717. [9:17:04 PM] Austin Terry: {I love how Optimus is just unphased}
  718. [9:17:07 PM] Tristan: Medlin brings up his hardcover book, knocking the longsword out of the orc's hands effortlessly.
  719. [9:17:26 PM] kuristina: [>implying optimus ever has emotions]
  720. [9:17:30 PM] andre 3000: [that's not prime, that's pyro]
  721. [9:17:36 PM] Austin Terry: {Aside from dead, of course}
  722. [9:17:43 PM] andre 3000: [who looks like optimus prime for reasons]
  723. [9:17:47 PM] kuristina: [optimus pyro]
  724. [9:17:50 PM] andre 3000: [stfu]
  725. [9:17:51 PM] Austin Terry: {That's a Transformers comic, not TF2, retard}
  726. [9:17:56 PM] kuristina: [^]
  727. [9:18:14 PM] kuristina: [are those reasons 'he is a firetruck']
  728. [9:18:18 PM] kuristina: [that would make sense]
  729. [9:18:31 PM] Austin Terry: {^}
  730. [9:18:34 PM] andre 3000: [he has a mental thing that makes him want to be like optimus prime]
  731. [9:18:35 PM] Stavo: {Cmon Trish lets get it rollin}
  732. [9:18:40 PM] andre 3000: [but yeah he's a firetruck]
  733. [9:18:44 PM] kuristina: [new et]
  734. [9:18:53 PM] kuristina: [they should remake et tbh]
  735. [9:18:58 PM] kuristina: [make et tacticool]
  736. [9:19:01 PM] kuristina: [all black]
  737. [9:19:02 PM] andre 3000: [it's a rly rly rly rly good comic]
  738. [9:19:12 PM] kuristina: [just like robocop!!!!!!!!]
  739. [9:19:19 PM] kuristina: TROSTEN
  740. [9:19:40 PM] Tristan: (It's Dillon's turn)
  741. [9:19:43 PM] Tristan: (Not my fault he dumb)
  742. [9:19:49 PM] Tristan: (wait)
  743. [9:19:54 PM] Tristan: ( wait )
  744. [9:19:58 PM] Tristan: (was it dillon or austin first)
  745. [9:20:05 PM] kuristina: [austin i think]
  746. [9:20:07 PM] Austin Terry: {Me, I think}
  747. [9:20:09 PM] Austin Terry: {Lemme see}
  748. [9:20:14 PM] kuristina: [yeah cause he clocked him with the book]
  749. [9:20:18 PM] Tristan: (Austin)
  750. [9:20:24 PM] Austin Terry: {Yaaay}
  751. [9:20:46 PM] Austin Terry: Meddle makes another swing with the dictionary
  752. [9:20:49 PM] Austin Terry: //d10+2
  753. [9:21:00 PM] Tristan: narkdom rolled 1d10; result:
  754. 4 +2
  755. Sum: 6
  756. [9:21:05 PM] kuristina: [lel]
  757. [9:21:06 PM] Austin Terry: {Hah}
  758. [9:21:09 PM] Tristan: (whoa whoa)
  759. [9:21:13 PM] Tristan: (you gotta roll to hit first)
  760. [9:21:19 PM] Tristan: (d100)
  761. [9:21:20 PM] Austin Terry: O
  762. [9:21:22 PM] Austin Terry: //d100
  763. [9:21:22 PM] Tristan: narkdom rolled 1d100; result:
  764. 11 +0
  765. Sum: 11
  766. [9:21:25 PM] Austin Terry: {HAH}
  767. [9:21:26 PM] Tristan: (Alright)
  768. [9:21:32 PM] Austin Terry: {Now roll 10}
  769. [9:21:40 PM] Tristan: (You can just use the roll you already got)
  770. [9:22:01 PM] Tristan: Meddle brings his heavy dictionary down upon the Orc's forehead with a sickening crack, and the Orc crumbles to the ground.
  771. [9:22:10 PM] kuristina: [is it ded]
  772. [9:22:21 PM] Tristan: (Are things usually dead when their heads make cracking noises?)
  773. [9:22:26 PM] kuristina: [yes but this is an orc]
  774. [9:22:31 PM] Tristan: (It's dead.)
  775. [9:22:34 PM] kuristina: [ok]
  776. [9:22:40 PM] Tristan: (Dillon's up)
  777. [9:22:51 PM] Eddie: (You roll WS for swords and shit right
  778. [9:23:02 PM] Stavo: Chop niggas head with waraxe
  779. [9:23:05 PM] Stavo: //d100
  780. [9:23:25 PM] Tristan: kingofnothing44 rolled 1d100; result:
  781. 74 +0
  782. Sum: 74
  783. [9:23:30 PM] Tristan: (yes)
  784. [9:23:35 PM] Tristan: ( yes even eddie)
  785. [9:23:55 PM] kuristina: [whats ws/bs]
  786. [9:23:59 PM] Eddie: (my turn )))))
  787. [9:24:02 PM] Tristan: The dreadlocked Orc rolls out of the way of Stavo's axe, losing a few big locks of hair in the process.
  788. [9:24:04 PM] Eddie: (weapon skill/ballistic skill)
  789. [9:24:11 PM] Tristan: (WS is melee skill pretty much, BS is ranged)
  790. [9:24:12 PM] Eddie: (we don't need ballistic skill for this though right)
  791. [9:24:18 PM] Tristan: (not unless you're throwing something)
  792. [9:24:18 PM] kuristina: [i have a crossbow]
  793. [9:24:20 PM] andre 3000: [WS for brassknucks?]
  794. [9:24:22 PM] Tristan: (or have a bow or something)
  795. [9:24:23 PM] kuristina: [i think]
  796. [9:24:24 PM] Tristan: (Yup)
  797. [9:24:34 PM] Eddie: Tode takes another swing at the dreadlock orc with his sword.
  798. [9:24:38 PM] Eddie: //d100
  799. [9:24:38 PM] Tristan: live:eddiawesome rolled 1d100; result:
  800. 95 +0
  801. Sum: 95
  802. [9:24:41 PM] Eddie: (WHOA NELLY)
  803. [9:24:43 PM] kuristina: [oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo]
  804. [9:24:56 PM] Tristan: //1d5
  805. [9:24:56 PM] Tristan: frowningmaccus rolled 1d 5; result:
  806. 1 +0
  807. Sum: 1
  808. [9:25:04 PM] Tristan: (Miggles, roll to dodge.)
  809. [9:25:07 PM] Tristan: (Agility.)
  810. [9:25:13 PM] kuristina: [uh]
  811. [9:25:19 PM] kuristina: [???]
  812. [9:25:24 PM] Eddie: (ROLL A D100????)
  813. [9:25:25 PM] Stavo: {//d100}
  814. [9:25:31 PM] Tristan: (Rolled a d5 to see where the sword's headed)
  815. [9:25:42 PM] Tristan: (1 Miggles, 2 Eddie, 3 Dillon, 4 Austin, 5 Danno)
  816. [9:25:44 PM] kuristina: [so i just roll d100]
  817. [9:25:47 PM] Tristan: (Yup)
  818. [9:25:48 PM] kuristina: //d100
  819. [9:25:48 PM] Tristan: migglecraft rolled 1d100; result:
  820. 44 +0
  821. Sum: 44
  822. [9:25:54 PM] Stavo: {Oh god}
  823. [9:26:01 PM] andre 3000: [rip.]
  824. [9:26:02 PM] Tristan: (Oh my God guys)
  825. [9:26:05 PM] kuristina: [i dont get it]
  826. [9:26:15 PM] Stavo: {You gon' get hit by Edwards}
  827. [9:26:19 PM] kuristina: [what is fail and what is not fail]
  828. [9:26:19 PM] Tristan: (1d10, Eddie.)
  829. [9:26:22 PM] Stavo: {Because he missed really hard}
  830. [9:26:31 PM | Edited 9:26:36 PM] kuristina: [and why the fuck is not fail not -50 thats dum]
  831. [9:26:34 PM] Stavo: {Fail is above your number in agility}
  832. [9:26:44 PM] kuristina: [ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh]
  833. [9:26:57 PM] kuristina: [so id have to get 26 or lower]
  834. [9:26:59 PM] Tristan: (if it was not fail not -50 there'd be a 50-50 chance for anything which would be odd)
  835. [9:27:00 PM] Tristan: (righto)
  836. [9:27:02 PM] Stavo: {Yep}
  837. [9:27:06 PM] Tristan: (you can upgrade it with exp though)
  838. [9:27:06 PM] kuristina: [shite]
  839. [9:27:21 PM] kuristina: [roll 1d10 edo]
  840. [9:27:24 PM] kuristina: [pls dont kil me]
  841. [9:27:37 PM] Stavo: {inb4 10}
  842. [9:27:52 PM] Tristan: (if he gets a 10 I swear to Christ)
  843. [9:28:02 PM] kuristina: [A REAL MAN NEVER DIES, EVEN WEHN HE IS KILLED!]
  844. [9:28:12 PM] andre 3000: [if he gets a 10 make him lose a limb or something]
  845. [9:28:13 PM] Tristan: (don't jynx yourself dummy)
  846. [9:28:17 PM] andre 3000: [like his head]
  847. [9:28:21 PM] andre 3000: [or his penis]
  848. [9:28:21 PM] Eddie: //d10
  849. [9:28:22 PM] Tristan: live:eddiawesome rolled 1d10; result:
  850. 2 +0
  851. Sum: 2
  852. [9:28:25 PM] kuristina: [phew]
  853. [9:28:32 PM] Stavo: {Ahaha{
  854. [9:29:23 PM] Tristan: The dreadlocked Orc parries Tode's longsword, sending it flat-ways into Thelis' side, knocking him on his behind.
  855. [9:29:40 PM] kuristina: "Ooof! Watch where you swing that thing!"
  856. [9:29:42 PM] Tristan: (Your armor took all but one point of that.)
  857. [9:29:45 PM] Tristan: (Lucky)
  858. [9:29:51 PM] Tristan: (You now have 7 wounds)
  859. [9:29:55 PM] kuristina: [cri]
  860. [9:30:08 PM] Tristan: (Who's up next?)
  861. [9:30:10 PM] Tristan: (Dannos?)
  862. [9:30:29 PM] andre 3000: [ye]
  863. [9:30:35 PM] andre 3000: [what orcs are left]
  864. [9:30:40 PM] Tristan: (Dreadlocked one.)
  865. [9:30:53 PM | Edited 9:30:55 PM] Tristan: (who, despite being chained up, is still alive)
  866. [9:30:58 PM] Stavo: {he on do groun rollin}
  867. [9:31:00 PM] andre 3000: [roll to roundhouse him in the face]
  868. [9:31:03 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  869. [9:31:03 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  870. 15 +0
  871. Sum: 15
  872. [9:31:08 PM] andre 3000: [B)]
  873. [9:31:26 PM] Tristan: (1d5+3 for damage)
  874. [9:31:39 PM] andre 3000: //d5+3
  875. [9:31:39 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d 5; result:
  876. 1 +3
  877. Sum: 4
  878. [9:32:28 PM] Tristan: Warden crosses his arms, extends his left leg, and bellows as he delivers a flying spinning kick to the dreadlocked orc's skull, kicking it off into the forest.
  879. [9:32:52 PM] andre 3000: [gg]
  880. [9:33:20 PM] Tristan: The dust settles, and the battle is finally over, leaving two dead bodies, one pile of guts and blood, and several now-unprotected crates.
  881. [9:33:35 PM] Tristan: (Congratulations, nobody died in their first fight.)
  882. [9:33:38 PM] Austin Terry: {Just got back, what'd I miss>?}
  883. [9:33:50 PM] Tristan: (Warden Chun Li kicked the last orc's head off)
  884. [9:34:12 PM] Austin Terry: {Hah}
  885. [9:34:14 PM] Austin Terry: {Good job}
  886. [9:34:25 PM] Stavo: {Eddie smacked Miggles in the butt}
  887. [9:34:44 PM] Eddie: "LOOT!"
  888. [9:34:44 PM] andre 3000: [;-)]
  889. [9:34:56 PM] Eddie: Tode runs to the biggest crate he sees and tries prying it open with his sword.
  890. [9:34:56 PM] Austin Terry: "Are there any books?"
  891. [9:35:01 PM] Stavo: I open a chest away from the others
  892. [9:35:02 PM] kuristina: Search one of the crates that someone else doesn't go for.
  893. [9:35:03 PM] Eddie: (do I gotta roll?)
  894. [9:35:06 PM] andre 3000: Warden walks over to the crates, and begins ripping the lids off.
  895. [9:35:08 PM | Edited 9:35:50 PM] Austin Terry: Meddle opens up a smaller crate, searching for books.
  896. [9:36:31 PM] Tristan: After a few minutes of looting, you count up the following from your haul: Two longswords, a dagger, three poorly-made orcish axes, an orc book simply titled "Orc Book" which doesn't even appear to have words, simply drawings of genitals (Orcs aren't known for being smart), and forty gold pieces.
  897. [9:36:48 PM] Eddie: "We split the gold EVENLY."
  898. [9:36:56 PM] Stavo: "Gimme dat money"
  899. [9:37:05 PM] Austin Terry: Meddle happily takes the book, studying the illustrations.
  900. [9:37:07 PM] Stavo: Attempt to take it before everyone else
  901. [9:37:11 PM] Stavo: Agility
  902. [9:37:16 PM] Stavo: //d100
  903. [9:37:16 PM] Tristan: kingofnothing44 rolled 1d100; result:
  904. 84 +0
  905. Sum: 84
  906. [9:37:18 PM] Stavo: f
  907. [9:37:23 PM] Austin Terry: {Hah{
  908. [9:37:32 PM] Tristan: Stavo reaches for the gold, but Tode leaps up to slap his hand out of the way with lightning-fast agility.
  909. [9:37:39 PM] andre 3000: Warden peeks over Meddle's shoulder and giggles.
  910. [9:37:40 PM] Eddie: Eight gold pieces for the each of us.
  911. [9:37:46 PM] kuristina: Take the dagger and put it in my belt.
  912. [9:37:52 PM | Edited 9:38:02 PM] Eddie: Tode takes his share and divides the rest of it between everyone else.
  913. [9:37:57 PM] Tristan: (>shair)
  914. [9:38:04 PM] Stavo: {SHAIR}
  915. [9:38:06 PM] kuristina: *Behind me, in my belt, where it can be hidden.
  916. [9:38:12 PM | Edited 9:38:26 PM] Austin Terry: Meddle takes his portion of the gold, hoping to spend it on books.
  917. [9:38:19 PM] Tristan: (be sure to add it to yo sheet nigguh)
  918. [9:38:23 PM] Eddie: (>spending gold on gold)
  919. [9:38:25 PM] kuristina: [9:38 PM] Austin Terry:
  920.  
  921. <<< Meddle takes his portion of the gold, hoping to spend it on gold.
  922. [9:38:38 PM | Edited 9:38:45 PM] Austin Terry: {Don't ask me about my life.}
  923. [9:38:40 PM] Stavo: Stavo takes the gold, leaving the weapons for others.
  924. [9:38:49 PM] andre 3000: Warden begins his attempt to eat the gold pieces.
  925. [9:38:52 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  926. [9:38:52 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  927. 21 +0
  928. Sum: 21
  929. [9:38:54 PM] Eddie: Tode grabs both longswords and tosses his old sword to the side.
  930. [9:38:59 PM] kuristina: Thelis takes his share of the gold.
  931. [9:39:02 PM] Tristan: (would that be toughness or willpower)
  932. [9:39:04 PM] andre 3000: [i guess willpower for that roll lmao]
  933. [9:39:12 PM] andre 3000: [either way i win it]
  934. [9:39:42 PM] andre 3000: [i'm defintiely gunna need a caretaker]
  935. [9:39:53 PM] kuristina: [punch warden in the face]
  936. [9:39:54 PM | Edited 9:40:04 PM] Tristan: Warden chomps down on the gold, his tard-strong teeth tearing through them with ease. You immediately, uncontrollably begin to wonder what effect his teeth would have on a person.
  937. [9:40:26 PM] Austin Terry: "Looks like someone's hungry," Meddle scoffs at his own joke. Obviously finding it hilarious.
  938. [9:40:28 PM] kuristina: [gold is pretty soft]
  939. [9:40:38 PM] Stavo: I think ill start using Warden as a pet with my chain since he keeps running off
  940. [9:40:43 PM] kuristina: Thelis frowns at Meddle, obviously not amused.
  941. [9:40:56 PM] Tristan: (just like ur weener)
  942. [9:41:02 PM] Stavo: {lol}
  943. [9:41:03 PM] kuristina: [when it isnt a rock]
  944. [9:41:07 PM] kuristina: [litrealyt ]
  945. [9:41:09 PM] andre 3000: [>gold is pretty soft]
  946. [9:41:12 PM] kuristina: [litre all ee]
  947. [9:41:16 PM] andre 3000: [not compared to human teeth nigga]
  948. [9:41:22 PM] kuristina: [dont even fucking start]
  949. [9:41:30 PM] kuristina: [you can bend gold with your HANDS]
  950. [9:41:37 PM] andre 3000: [eat my nuts]
  951. [9:41:39 PM] Tristan: (please eat gold on cam miggles)
  952. [9:41:39 PM] Eddie: "We should continue on to the town.
  953. [9:41:40 PM] Eddie: "
  954. [9:41:45 PM] andre 3000: [lmflao]
  955. [9:41:50 PM] Stavo: Attempt to chain Warden around the chest without freaking him out
  956. [9:41:51 PM] kuristina: [ill eat ur dick on cam ;)]
  957. [9:41:59 PM] Tristan: (sorry im taken)
  958. [9:42:03 PM] Tristan: (right austin)
  959. [9:42:04 PM] Austin Terry: {;)}
  960. [9:42:07 PM] kuristina: [fags]
  961. [9:42:09 PM] Austin Terry: {You can bet your sweet ass}
  962. [9:42:13 PM] andre 3000: [roll, fool]
  963. [9:42:22 PM] andre 3000: [willpower or toughness? B)]
  964. [9:42:27 PM] Stavo: //d100
  965. [9:42:27 PM] Tristan: kingofnothing44 rolled 1d100; result:
  966. 96 +0
  967. Sum: 96
  968. [9:42:27 PM] Tristan: (Strength.)
  969. [9:42:32 PM] Tristan: (AHAHAHAHA)
  970. [9:42:33 PM] andre 3000: [HEHEHEHEHE]
  971. [9:42:40 PM] Stavo: {Is that a critical}
  972. [9:42:45 PM] Stavo: {What the fffff}
  973. [9:42:50 PM] andre 3000: [ 8-) ]
  974. [9:42:54 PM] kuristina: [>warden retaliates, punching stavo in the chest, going through his rib cage and smashing his heart]
  975. [9:43:01 PM] Tristan: Stavo swings his chain around Warden's chest, where it immediately snaps in half. Warden, still chomping down on gold, doesn't even seem to notice.
  976. [9:43:10 PM] Stavo: {Lame}
  977. [9:43:20 PM] Stavo: {He should freak out instead}
  978. [9:43:24 PM] kuristina: [would you prefer to lack a heart]
  979. [9:43:29 PM] Stavo: {My chain is too beast niggaaaa}
  980. [9:43:32 PM] andre 3000: [yeah that was lame critfail]
  981. [9:43:33 PM] Eddie: (You lost your chain BITCH)
  982. [9:43:37 PM] andre 3000: [tru tho]
  983. [9:43:42 PM] andre 3000: [you did lose oyur chain]
  984. [9:43:43 PM] Tristan: (well you can freak out if you want to danno)
  985. [9:43:46 PM] Austin Terry: Meddle continues to read the illustrations.
  986. [9:44:05 PM] andre 3000: Warden screams for a long time, but doesn't react in any other way.
  987. [9:44:16 PM] Stavo: {lolk}
  988. [9:44:20 PM] kuristina: "What are you reading, Med- oh god" Thelis knocks the book out of Meddle's hand as an involentary reaction.
  989. [9:44:33 PM | Edited 9:44:55 PM] kuristina: The book falls flat on the ground, folding one of the pages.
  990. [9:44:58 PM] Eddie: (medlin suspends thelis for life)
  991. [9:45:05 PM] Stavo: {Oh god}
  992. [9:45:18 PM] Tristan: (Medlin has only written up one student in his teaching career)
  993. [9:45:20 PM] Tristan: (Zack)
  994. [9:45:21 PM] Austin Terry: {OH}
  995. [9:45:23 PM] Austin Terry: {IT}
  996. [9:45:24 PM] Austin Terry: {IS}
  997. [9:45:26 PM] Austin Terry: {ON}
  998. [9:45:35 PM] Austin Terry: {I heard he wrote someone else up this year.}
  999. [9:45:36 PM] Stavo: {He's gonna threaten him!}
  1000. [9:46:07 PM] Austin Terry: Meddle picks up the book, staring at the folded page. "Hey! Don't do that again!"
  1001. [9:46:13 PM | Edited 9:46:23 PM] kuristina: "Oh - I'm sorry."
  1002. [9:46:22 PM] andre 3000: Warden looks over at Meddle and attempts to comfort him by patting him on the head.
  1003. [9:46:26 PM] andre 3000: [what 2 roll]
  1004. [9:46:31 PM] Tristan: (By the way guys)
  1005. [9:46:31 PM] Stavo: "Calm down, Meddle"
  1006. [9:46:33 PM] kuristina: "I didn't expect.. orc dicks."
  1007. [9:46:35 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  1008. 6 +0
  1009. Sum: 6
  1010. [9:46:36 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  1011. [9:46:40 PM] Tristan: (Austin's inspiration for Meddle is the topic picture)
  1012. [9:46:40 PM] Austin Terry: {I'm scared Warden's gonna break Meddle's neck}
  1013. [9:46:47 PM] andre 3000: [whatever i roll i succeeded]
  1014. [9:47:02 PM] Austin Terry: {HAHAHA}
  1015. [9:47:08 PM] Eddie: (>you'll never be able to pull off aviators like Medlin)
  1016. [9:47:35 PM] Tristan: Warden pats Medlin on the hat softly. Sadly, "Softly" for Warden is "Really, really hard" for Medlin, and it sends him face-first into the dirt, a cloud of dust puffing up from the impact.
  1017. [9:47:59 PM] andre 3000: Warden looks down and shrugs.
  1018. [9:47:59 PM] kuristina: Offer to help Medlin up as a means of apology for ruining his orc dick book.
  1019. [9:48:22 PM] Stavo: "Lets quit jerking off and get to the town"
  1020. [9:48:27 PM] Austin Terry: {Who's Meddlin?}
  1021. [9:48:29 PM] Austin Terry: {I'm Meddle}
  1022. [9:48:32 PM] Eddie: Tode gets fed up and walks toward the town.
  1023. [9:48:41 PM] kuristina: [tristan keeps saying medlin]
  1024. [9:48:49 PM] Stavo: Stavo follows
  1025. [9:48:51 PM] Austin Terry: Meddle slowly reaches for her hand to get up,"I'm gonna have to send him out if he does that again."
  1026. [9:48:54 PM] andre 3000: Warden follows.
  1027. [9:48:56 PM] Eddie: (It's hard to differentiate the two considering they're the same person.)
  1028. [9:49:02 PM] kuristina: [>her]
  1029. [9:49:06 PM] Stavo: {>her?}
  1030. [9:49:09 PM] kuristina: [am i a girl now??????]
  1031. [9:49:11 PM] Austin Terry: {I sed it}
  1032. [9:49:12 PM] Austin Terry: {Yep}
  1033. [9:49:15 PM] Austin Terry: {;)}
  1034. [9:49:17 PM] Tristan: (It's a habit)
  1035. [9:49:20 PM] andre 3000: [miggles is canonically a girl now]
  1036. [9:49:30 PM] Tristan: (Poor Miggles)
  1037. [9:49:36 PM] Stavo: {Miggles is girl}
  1038. [9:49:39 PM] andre 3000: [erp potential just skyrocketed]
  1039. [9:49:44 PM] kuristina: Suddenly, everyone realizes that Thelis was a girl all along.
  1040. [9:49:45 PM] Stavo: Attempts to grab dat booty
  1041. [9:49:45 PM] Tristan: (He's been thrown up on, nearly pulled in half, fell down, and slapped in the stomach with a sword)
  1042. [9:49:48 PM] Stavo: //d100
  1043. [9:49:48 PM] Tristan: kingofnothing44 rolled 1d100; result:
  1044. 93 +0
  1045. Sum: 93
  1046. [9:50:01 PM] andre 3000: [prepare to lose a hand]
  1047. [9:50:12 PM] Tristan: (It's not above 95 so not a critfail)
  1048. [9:50:25 PM] Tristan: Thelis turns around, obviously not pleased with the attempted bootygrab
  1049. [9:50:35 PM] kuristina: Slap Stavo in the face.
  1050. [9:50:38 PM] kuristina: //d100
  1051. [9:50:38 PM] Tristan: migglecraft rolled 1d100; result:
  1052. 91 +0
  1053. Sum: 91
  1054. [9:50:45 PM] kuristina: kuristina cries
  1055. [9:50:53 PM] *** Tristan has changed the conversation topic to "" ***
  1056. [9:51:01 PM] kuristina: [i have not gotten a good roll this whole game]
  1057. [9:51:04 PM] *** Tristan has changed the conversation topic to ""They took my boots. I took their lives."" ***
  1058. [9:51:16 PM] *** Tristan has changed the conversation topic to ""They took my books. I took their lives."" ***
  1059. [9:51:18 PM] System: Available commands:
  1060. /me [text]
  1061. /topic [text]
  1062. /add [skypename+]
  1063. /alertson [text]
  1064. /alertsoff
  1065. /leave
  1066. /get creator
  1067. /get role
  1068. /whois [skypename]
  1069. /setrole [skypename] MASTER|HELPER|USER|LISTENER
  1070. /kick [skypename]
  1071. /kickban [skypename]
  1072. /get uri
  1073. /get options
  1074. /set options [[+|-]flag] ..
  1075. /setpassword [password] [password hint]
  1076. /clearpassword
  1077. /get password_hint
  1078. /get banlist
  1079. /get allowlist
  1080. /set banlist [[+|-]mask] ..
  1081. /set allowlist [[+|-]mask] ..
  1082. /golive [token]
  1083. /invite [skypename]
  1084. /fork [skypename+]
  1085. /help
  1086. For more help please see http://www.skype.com/go/help.chathelp
  1087. [9:51:23 PM] Austin Terry: [9:51 PM] Tristan:
  1088.  
  1089. <<< Tristan has changed the conversation topic to ""They took my boots. I took their lives.""
  1090. [9:51:23 PM] Stavo: {>boots}
  1091. [9:51:23 PM] Tristan: Stavo ducks out of the way of the slap.
  1092. [9:51:32 PM] Stavo: Slap that hoe back
  1093. [9:51:35 PM] Stavo: //d100
  1094. [9:51:49 PM] kuristina: [>hoe]
  1095. [9:52:12 PM] kuristina: [>suddenly, a garden till appears in mid-air and intercepts stavo's slap]
  1096. [9:52:13 PM] Tristan: kingofnothing44 rolled 1d100; result:
  1097. 74 +0
  1098. Sum: 74
  1099. [9:52:25 PM] *** Tristan has changed the conversation picture. ***
  1100. [9:52:29 PM] Stavo: {Im done sexual harrasing then}
  1101. [9:52:41 PM] Tristan: Thelis ducks out of the way, as well.
  1102. [9:52:44 PM] Austin Terry: {FUCK}
  1103. [9:52:46 PM] kuristina: Punch Stavo in the gut.
  1104. [9:52:48 PM] kuristina: //d100
  1105. [9:52:48 PM] Austin Terry: {WATER JUST CAME OUT MY NOSE}
  1106. [9:52:48 PM] Tristan: migglecraft rolled 1d100; result:
  1107. 78 +0
  1108. Sum: 78
  1109. [9:52:53 PM] Austin Terry: {THAT FUCKING PICTURE CHANGED}
  1110. [9:52:59 PM] kuristina: [I HAVE NOT GOTTEN A GOOD ROLL EVER]
  1111. [9:53:05 PM] Stavo: {Medlin}
  1112. [9:53:31 PM] Austin Terry: Meddle walks away, too developed in his new book to pay attention to reality.
  1113. [9:53:44 PM] Tristan: (Are we ready to continue to town)
  1114. [9:53:48 PM] kuristina: [yes]
  1115. [9:53:49 PM] andre 3000: [ye]
  1116. [9:53:54 PM] Stavo: (Yes)
  1117. [9:54:07 PM] kuristina: "Whatever. Don't do that again."
  1118. [9:54:25 PM] Tristan: The party continues onwards, stopping occasionally to make sure Meddle doesn't wander off into the forest while reading and walking (which is very dangerous), or to wipe drool from Warden's mouth.
  1119. [9:54:40 PM] Stavo: {What are we, his mom}
  1120. [9:54:53 PM] kuristina: [collectively we are the mother of both of them]
  1121. [9:54:53 PM] andre 3000: [yes]
  1122. [9:58:17 PM] Tristan: Before too long, they enter the small village of Anoire, finally making it to (relative) safely. They take a quick looking around, noting the town Inn/Tavern, The Pepper Medic, the marketplace, which is apparently constantly visited by everyone in town non-stop, as humans, elves, and occasionally orcs hustle back and forth through it. There's also a questing board in the middle of the marketplace, absolutely filled with "Help Wanted" ads, and the Mayor's office sits at the far end of town, staffed by several guardsmen in chainmail, brandishing red-and-blue shields.
  1123. [9:58:53 PM] kuristina: [pepper medic?]
  1124. [9:58:59 PM] Stavo: Stavo goes straight to the pub
  1125. [9:59:16 PM] Austin Terry: Meddle goes to the marketplace, hoping to score some books.
  1126. [9:59:36 PM] Austin Terry: {Tristan, why do I have this feeling that it'll be like the town they went to in the game on Community?}
  1127. [9:59:41 PM] Stavo: {Shutup about books lol}
  1128. [9:59:53 PM] Tristan: (don't bully austin for his roleplaying dillon)
  1129. [9:59:55 PM] Austin Terry: {I will when Medlin shuts up about books}
  1130. [10:00:13 PM] Stavo: {Talk about your cancer or something}
  1131. [10:00:18 PM] kuristina: [is the pepper medic the doctor]
  1132. [10:00:20 PM] andre 3000: [.]
  1133. [10:00:29 PM] Tristan: (It's the name of the inn)
  1134. [10:00:38 PM] Tristan: Meddle is approached by a shady-looking man with a very large nose, rubbing his hands together menacingly.
  1135. [10:00:47 PM] Tristan: "Can I help you? Ehehehehe."
  1136. [10:00:49 PM] Eddie: (IT'S WILL)
  1137. [10:00:56 PM] Austin Terry: "Yes, I'm looking for some books."
  1138. [10:01:02 PM] kuristina: Go somewhere to search for medical supplies.
  1139. [10:01:04 PM] Eddie: Tode heads straight for the inn.
  1140. [10:01:12 PM] Stavo: {Will!]
  1141. [10:01:15 PM] Tristan: "My name's William, and I deal in objects... some may call 'spectacular,' others... may call them 'demonic.'"
  1142. [10:01:19 PM] andre 3000: Warden, distracted by the bustle, looks back to see that half of the party has walked off. He stumbles after [miggle's character who i forget]
  1143. [10:01:36 PM] Austin Terry: "What is this object you speak of?"
  1144. [10:01:36 PM] kuristina: [thelis]
  1145. [10:01:40 PM] andre 3000: [ok]
  1146. [10:01:42 PM] Austin Terry: {Be right back, gotta take bad hank out}
  1147. [10:01:56 PM] Stavo: [Does that mean jack off}
  1148. [10:01:58 PM] kuristina: [is that the name you gave your dick]
  1149. [10:02:01 PM] Eddie: (be right back gotta take good valdet out)
  1150. [10:02:10 PM] kuristina: [>good
  1151. >valdet]
  1152. [10:02:11 PM] Tristan: "And just your luck, I have a magical tome said to be able to raise a very powerful, evil spirit, for the low price of 5 gold!"
  1153. [10:02:29 PM] Tristan: "The Jewnomicon Ex Sheklis."
  1154. [10:02:35 PM] kuristina: [its pronounced valday right not vald-et]
  1155. [10:02:50 PM] Eddie: (it's pronounced val-det)
  1156. [10:02:54 PM] andre 3000: [nah, in albanian it's probablt just valdet.]
  1157. [10:02:59 PM] kuristina: [gay as fuck]
  1158. [10:03:01 PM] andre 3000: [see]
  1159. [10:03:19 PM] andre 3000: [albanians don't really do silent letters]
  1160. [10:03:28 PM] kuristina: [albanians only do gays]
  1161. [10:03:32 PM] Tristan: Stavo goes into The Pepper Medic, wiping blood off of his exposed, hairy black arms, sitting down.
  1162. [10:04:09 PM] Stavo: "Strongest you got"
  1163. [10:04:21 PM] Tristan: A big, fat orc sits at the bar, polishing off a glass, occasionally stop to wipe his armpits before handling the glass again. "3 gold, humie."
  1164. [10:04:23 PM] andre 3000: [better give him a Warden then hehehehehe B) ]
  1165. [10:04:50 PM] Stavo: Toss him 3 gold while examining the orcs
  1166. [10:04:59 PM] Stavo: "You let those type in your place?"
  1167. [10:05:16 PM] Eddie: (he IS an orc)
  1168. [10:05:18 PM] Eddie: (DUMMY)
  1169. [10:05:22 PM] kuristina: [>the orc bartender lets orcs in his bar????????????]
  1170. [10:05:24 PM] Tristan: "We call this drink Dragon's Piss. Don't smell it, it'll knock you out," the Orc says, slamming a sweat-stained glass on the counter, and pouring a glass filled with yellowish-brown liquid.
  1171. [10:05:36 PM] Tristan: "Are you silly, boy?"
  1172. [10:05:39 PM] kuristina: [is it actually dragon piss]
  1173. [10:05:41 PM] Stavo: {Sorry, didnt read it right}
  1174. [10:05:53 PM] Austin Terry: "What does it do?"
  1175. [10:05:56 PM] Stavo: {I take back comment}
  1176. [10:06:12 PM] Stavo: Stavo tosses it back without another thought
  1177. [10:06:29 PM] andre 3000: [make him roll willpower to not die from the drink]
  1178. [10:06:57 PM] Stavo: {or black out even}
  1179. [10:07:04 PM] Stavo: {could be key in the plot}
  1180. [10:07:13 PM] Tristan: "Raises a horrible, evil spirit," William says, rubbing his hands together. "If you go to the right spot. They say a long time ago, there was a poet, by the name of Vouldette Poundme, who wrote harrowing, terrifying tales of accidentally destroying entire cities and a world still going on after the end of time."
  1181. [10:07:33 PM] Eddie: (YOU)
  1182. [10:08:06 PM] Tristan: "Vouldette was regarded as a fearsome man, and, more importantly, a masterful writer. His rival and brother, Edwan, however, had him assassinated in a fit of jealousy."
  1183. [10:08:17 PM] Austin Terry: {AHAHAHAHA}
  1184. [10:08:17 PM] Eddie: (I'm dying)
  1185. [10:08:17 PM] andre 3000: [lol'd]
  1186. [10:08:20 PM] Eddie: (holy shit)
  1187. [10:08:42 PM] Tristan: "Vouldette's spirit possessed the graveyard he was buried in, making it unsafe to travel to at night. Now, people must be buried in the daytime, or risk being killed."
  1188. [10:08:54 PM] Eddie: (>people being buried)
  1189. [10:08:55 PM] Austin Terry: "No thanks, I wouldn't know what to do with that power. I might accidently blow up a nuclear mine or something."
  1190. [10:08:56 PM] kuristina: [>kill dead people]
  1191. [10:08:58 PM] Stavo: {rotf}
  1192. [10:08:59 PM] Eddie: (r>risk being killed)
  1193. [10:09:00 PM] Tristan: "However, if you were to take this book and summon him at night, maybe you could banish him from the grav- Oh."
  1194. [10:09:06 PM] Tristan: "What if I sell it to you for cheaper?"
  1195. [10:09:12 PM] Austin Terry: "How cheap?"
  1196. [10:09:21 PM] Tristan: "Four gold."
  1197. [10:09:27 PM] kuristina: [FUCKING JEW]
  1198. [10:09:35 PM] Eddie: (>that's half of your gold)
  1199. [10:09:35 PM] Stavo: {Wasnt it 3 lol}
  1200. [10:09:42 PM] kuristina: [it was 5]
  1201. [10:09:42 PM] Tristan: (Three was your drink Dilldo)
  1202. [10:09:50 PM] Stavo: {ILL DRINK YOUR DILDO}
  1203. [10:09:52 PM] Austin Terry: "Eh... I heard something about him. He wrote about Mordecus and Rigbard. I don't think anythin about him is worth 4 gold, sorry."
  1204. [10:09:55 PM] Stavo: {FAG}
  1205. [10:10:01 PM] Eddie: (YOU COCK)
  1206. [10:10:10 PM] andre 3000: [lol111!!!!!]
  1207. [10:10:10 PM] Stavo: {Just buy it fag}
  1208. [10:10:14 PM] Tristan: "I'm sorry, sir. I took you for a fan of books," William says, turning away disappointed.
  1209. [10:10:14 PM] kuristina: [>mordecus and rigbard]
  1210. [10:10:30 PM] Austin Terry: "However, 3 gold, and you have a deal."
  1211. [10:10:53 PM] Tristan: "Deal," William says, throwing the book into Meddle's hands.
  1212. [10:11:02 PM] kuristina: [stab william]
  1213. [10:11:15 PM] Eddie: (take off with the gold)
  1214. [10:11:16 PM] Austin Terry: {I'll impale him with a dictionary}
  1215. [10:11:20 PM] Stavo: {Stab his Jew self and steal the books}
  1216. [10:11:22 PM] Austin Terry: {He never took the gold}
  1217. [10:11:36 PM] Tristan: The book's an ugly thing, paperback, with a terrible drawing on the cover of three men. One's tall, wearing a green tunic, the other medium-sized, wearing red and a black helmet, and the last one short, wearing a red-and-yellow shirt.
  1218. [10:11:39 PM] Austin Terry: {That's not something we do in a marketplace, Dildo}
  1219. [10:11:48 PM] Tristan: "Now, the gold, please?"
  1220. [10:12:04 PM] Stavo: {F-in ed edd n eddy}
  1221. [10:12:12 PM | Edited 10:12:14 PM] kuristina: [OMF]
  1222. [10:12:15 PM] andre 3000: [omf]
  1223. [10:12:48 PM] Austin Terry: "Oh sure," Meddle sighs, placing 3 gold in to his boney hands. It's obvious he's a master of the skinflute.
  1224. [10:13:08 PM] Austin Terry: "Don't go spending it on orange carbonated beverages either."
  1225. [10:13:20 PM] Tristan: "Pleasure doing business with you, Goyim," William says, before disappearing into the crowd.
  1226. [10:13:27 PM] kuristina: [>skinflute]
  1227. [10:13:39 PM] Tristan: You feel an evil presence as you put the book into your duffel bag.
  1228. [10:13:49 PM] kuristina: [now roll me]
  1229. [10:13:51 PM] Austin Terry: {We're not going near any power plants}
  1230. [10:15:17 PM] Tristan: (You're looking for a doctor right Miggle)
  1231. [10:15:44 PM | Edited 10:15:50 PM] kuristina: [yes]
  1232. [10:16:34 PM] Tristan: Thelis spots a man in bright white robes and a black, beaked mask sitting in the middle of the marketplace, peddling what is advertised as "Medikul suply's"
  1233. [10:16:58 PM] andre 3000: Warden continues following the buttpirate like a puppy.
  1234. [10:17:46 PM] kuristina: Thelis takes notice, but ignores Warden. She walks up to the man wearing the [is it a plague doctor's mask?] plague doctor's mask and initiates conversation.
  1235. [10:17:51 PM] Tristan: (Yes)
  1236. [10:18:09 PM] kuristina: "Hi, I was wounded recently. How would I go about fixing that?"
  1237. [10:18:49 PM] Tristan: "DUH, HI, UM, HOW WERE YOU, UH, WOUNDED?" the man screams, the mask slightly muffling his voice.
  1238. [10:19:05 PM] kuristina: Thelis blinks.
  1239. [10:19:31 PM] Stavo: {DIALOUGE}
  1240. [10:19:36 PM] Tristan: (Somebody should be buying the inn rooms)
  1241. [10:19:42 PM] Tristan: (unless you plan to sleep on the street with jews about)
  1242. [10:19:47 PM] kuristina: "I was hugged by that -oaf- back there," she points at Warden. "And I was hit by a sword on my side."
  1243. [10:19:57 PM] andre 3000: Warden grins and waves.
  1244. [10:19:59 PM] Stavo: {lol she}
  1245. [10:20:01 PM] kuristina: "I was wearing armor, though."
  1246. [10:20:10 PM] kuristina: [we have established that thelis is a female]
  1247. [10:20:23 PM] Tristan: "HUH. TAKE OFF, UH, YOUR ARMOR, AND, UH, LIFT YOUR SHIRT, FOR BRUISES."
  1248. [10:20:38 PM] Tristan: (good job making your character a girl miggles)
  1249. [10:20:41 PM] Eddie: (HHAHAHAHAHAHA)
  1250. [10:20:44 PM] Tristan: (now doctor visits are uncomfortable)
  1251. [10:20:44 PM] kuristina: Thelis stares deadpan at the medical vendor.
  1252. [10:20:53 PM] kuristina: "Don't you have any potions?"
  1253. [10:21:02 PM] Tristan: "FOR BRUISES? UH, ARE YOU DUMB?"
  1254. [10:21:33 PM] Stavo: {is the doctor tony bradley}
  1255. [10:21:35 PM] andre 3000: Warden's top tier mind picks up the word "dumb" and instinctively starts growling.
  1256. [10:21:38 PM] kuristina: "Fine. Pervert." Thelis takes off her armor and hands it to Warden, expecting him to hold onto it.
  1257. [10:22:05 PM] andre 3000: Warden grabs the armor and stops growling, confused.
  1258. [10:22:14 PM] Tristan: "THOSE ARE BRUISES. GO LAY DOWN, YOU'LL, UH, BE OKAY."
  1259. [10:22:25 PM] Tristan: (THIS WOULD BE SO LESS AWKWARD IF YOU WERE A DUDE)
  1260. [10:22:29 PM] Stavo: {Tristan is getting kinky}
  1261. [10:22:30 PM] Austin Terry: {Is Warden about to have his first hard on?}
  1262. [10:22:36 PM] andre 3000: [get up out]
  1263. [10:22:41 PM] Stavo: {Lemme unzip}
  1264. [10:22:42 PM] kuristina: "You had to tell me to take off my armor just so you could say all I needed was rest?"
  1265. [10:22:56 PM] Stavo: {Be more sexy}
  1266. [10:22:58 PM] Tristan: "NO, UH, I KINDA JUST WANTED TO."
  1267. [10:23:07 PM] Tristan: "FIVE GOLD, PLEASE."
  1268. [10:23:14 PM] kuristina: "Fuck you, sleazebag."
  1269. [10:23:27 PM] kuristina: Thelis grabs her armor from Warden and puts it back on.
  1270. [10:23:37 PM] Stavo: {Booooooooooo}
  1271. [10:23:39 PM] Tristan: "UH, THAT'S VERY RUDE. UM. I'LL PUT IT ON YOUR TAB."
  1272. [10:23:42 PM] Eddie: Tode realizes he has no money and heads off to find Stavo.
  1273. [10:23:51 PM] kuristina: [>this spaghetti doctor]
  1274. [10:23:57 PM] Stavo: Turning up in a bar
  1275. [10:24:08 PM] Tristan: (I'm trying to balance spaghetti and stupid for this guy)
  1276. [10:24:22 PM] kuristina: Thelis leaves the medikul suplyer and heads to the inn.
  1277. [10:24:34 PM] kuristina: But not before giving the doktor the bird.
  1278. [10:24:46 PM] andre 3000: Warden follows.
  1279. [10:24:56 PM] Tristan: "UH, Y-YOU TOO."
  1280. [10:25:16 PM] kuristina: Throw a rock at the doctor.
  1281. [10:25:25 PM] Tristan: (inb4 bad roll)
  1282. [10:25:28 PM] Stavo: {Oooh bad a}
  1283. [10:25:29 PM] kuristina: //d100
  1284. [10:25:29 PM] Tristan: migglecraft rolled 1d100; result:
  1285. 63 +0
  1286. Sum: 63
  1287. [10:25:34 PM] kuristina: Cry.
  1288. [10:25:35 PM] Austin Terry: {AHAHAHAH}
  1289. [10:25:35 PM] Stavo: {I DONT THINK SO}
  1290. [10:25:37 PM] Tristan: (Amazing.)
  1291. [10:25:56 PM] Tristan: The rock skips by the doctor, harmlessly. He shrugs.
  1292. [10:25:58 PM] andre 3000: Warden, intrigued, picks up a stone and whips it at the doctor.
  1293. [10:26:04 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  1294. [10:26:04 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  1295. 73 +0
  1296. Sum: 73
  1297. [10:26:10 PM] andre 3000: [dang]
  1298. [10:26:22 PM] Eddie: As Tode is passing by, he decides to throw a rock at a stupid looking doctor.
  1299. [10:26:25 PM] Eddie: //d100
  1300. [10:26:25 PM] Tristan: live:eddiawesome rolled 1d100; result:
  1301. 20 +0
  1302. Sum: 20
  1303. [10:26:42 PM] Stavo: {Stone that nigga}
  1304. [10:26:48 PM] Tristan: the really big rock also skips by the doctor, but lands perfectly on his medikul suply's stand, smashing the stand to pieces and spilling medical potions and jars of leeches everywhere.
  1305. [10:26:51 PM] kuristina: [EVERYONE IS STONING THE DOCTOR IM LOSING MY SHIT]
  1306. [10:26:55 PM] Austin Terry: Meddle, seeing Warden, Tode and Thelis throw a rock, Meddle decides to throw one also.
  1307. [10:26:59 PM] Tristan: (roll damage eddie)
  1308. [10:26:59 PM] Eddie: (I succeeded, by the way)
  1309. [10:27:02 PM] Austin Terry: //d100
  1310. [10:27:02 PM] Tristan: narkdom rolled 1d100; result:
  1311. 28 +0
  1312. Sum: 28
  1313. [10:27:07 PM] Eddie: (What damage it do?)
  1314. [10:27:17 PM] kuristina: WRE GONNA KILL THE COCDT R
  1315. [10:27:18 PM] Tristan: (1d5+ strength bonus)
  1316. [10:27:18 PM] kuristina: E
  1317. [10:27:24 PM] kuristina: im dying
  1318. [10:27:25 PM] Eddie: //d5+2
  1319. [10:27:25 PM] Tristan: live:eddiawesome rolled 1d 5; result:
  1320. 2 +2
  1321. Sum: 4
  1322. [10:27:48 PM] Tristan: The stone hits the doctor in the face, breaking the mask, revealing a fat, red, neckbearded face.
  1323. [10:28:00 PM] Tristan: (I think Austin succeeded too)
  1324. [10:28:01 PM] kuristina: Not to be outdone, Thelis throws another rock.
  1325. [10:28:10 PM] Austin Terry: {high roll}
  1326. [10:28:11 PM] Tristan: (So Austin, roll 1d5+2)
  1327. [10:28:17 PM] Austin Terry: //d5+2
  1328. [10:28:17 PM] Tristan: narkdom rolled 1d 5; result:
  1329. 3 +2
  1330. Sum: 5
  1331. [10:28:18 PM] Eddie: (inb4 we kill him with fucking rocks)
  1332. [10:28:22 PM] kuristina: [^]
  1333. [10:28:39 PM] Tristan: Meddle's rock cracks the doctor in the mouth, busting out a few teeth, sending him on his back.
  1334. [10:28:45 PM] Tristan: "WOOOOOOOOOOW," the doctor yells.
  1335. [10:28:49 PM] kuristina: //d100
  1336. [10:28:49 PM] Tristan: migglecraft rolled 1d100; result:
  1337. 85 +0
  1338. Sum: 85
  1339. [10:28:55 PM] Tristan: (Oh my God miggles come on)
  1340. [10:28:58 PM] kuristina: [brb seppukku]
  1341. [10:28:59 PM] andre 3000: Warden, tried of rocks, walks over to the downed doctor and stomps on his face.
  1342. [10:29:02 PM] Austin Terry: {Jesus Christ, Meddle has super strength}
  1343. [10:29:06 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  1344. [10:29:06 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  1345. 60 +0
  1346. Sum: 60
  1347. [10:29:12 PM] andre 3000: [fuk why is DH so hard]
  1348. [10:29:27 PM] Tristan: The doctor rolls out of the way, his rolls of fat sticking to the road as he rolls.
  1349. [10:29:34 PM] Eddie: (Is his name Phil)
  1350. [10:29:36 PM] Eddie: (Is he)
  1351. [10:29:39 PM] Eddie: (Is he on the)
  1352. [10:29:40 PM] Eddie: (DARK SIDE)
  1353. [10:29:44 PM] Tristan: He gets up, dusts himself off, tips his hat, and runs off.
  1354. [10:30:17 PM] andre 3000: warden frowns.
  1355. [10:30:22 PM] kuristina: Thelis grabs all the potions that were dropped from the table.
  1356. [10:30:49 PM] Tristan: Thelis manages to salvage 3 healing potions from the wreckage, attracting the attention of some medical leeches as she picks them up.
  1357. [10:30:51 PM] Austin Terry: "I'd say this was a successful shopping trip."
  1358. [10:31:10 PM] Tristan: //1d100
  1359. [10:31:10 PM] Tristan: frowningmaccus rolled 1d100; result:
  1360. 93 +0
  1361. Sum: 93
  1362. [10:31:13 PM] Eddie: By now, Tode has found Stavo in the bar.
  1363. [10:31:19 PM] Tristan: The leeches attempt to attach themselves to her arm, but she shakes them off.
  1364. [10:31:24 PM] Tristan: (Now to focus on Tode and Stavo)
  1365. [10:31:31 PM] kuristina: [10/10]
  1366. [10:31:33 PM] Tristan: "No, really, don't sniff that. Dragon's Piss is nasty."
  1367. [10:31:44 PM] Eddie: "I need that cash, Stavo. I'm gonna buy the rooms."
  1368. [10:31:58 PM] Eddie: Tode taps Stavo on the shoulder.
  1369. [10:32:01 PM] Stavo: Throws back whole drink
  1370. [10:32:04 PM] Stavo: Turns around
  1371. [10:32:08 PM] Tristan: (how is a dwarf tapping a black man on the shoulder)
  1372. [10:32:12 PM] Stavo: "The F you want?"
  1373. [10:32:14 PM] Eddie: (tip toes)
  1374. [10:32:20 PM] Eddie: "The 15 gold that we got from Luigi."
  1375. [10:32:43 PM] Stavo: "And who says I have it?"
  1376. [10:32:46 PM] Stavo: BURP
  1377. [10:32:49 PM] Eddie: "You took it, you cunt."
  1378. [10:32:51 PM] Eddie: "I saw you."
  1379. [10:32:55 PM] Stavo: "Whoah, whats in this stuff?"
  1380. [10:33:37 PM] Stavo: "HEY Short stack, why don't you blow off and just mine gold or whatever you dwarf queers do?"
  1381. [10:33:46 PM] Eddie: "Oh, I've had it with you."
  1382. [10:33:49 PM] Stavo: "Gimme another, tender."
  1383. [10:33:54 PM] Tristan: The bartender simply smiles and turns back to polishing glasses with his sweat.
  1384. [10:33:59 PM] Eddie: Tode rips the glass from Stavo's hand and throws it in his black ass face.
  1385. [10:34:03 PM] Eddie: //d100
  1386. [10:34:03 PM] Tristan: live:eddiawesome rolled 1d100; result:
  1387. 51 +0
  1388. Sum: 51
  1389. [10:34:21 PM] Tristan: Tode reaches for the glass a little too hard, smashing it.
  1390. [10:34:33 PM] Eddie: "Well, there goes that plan."
  1391. [10:34:41 PM] Tristan: "You paying 10 gold for that," the Bartender says, absent-mindedly.
  1392. [10:34:44 PM] Eddie: "Either way, I'm gonna pummel you if you don't give me the gold."
  1393. [10:34:53 PM] Stavo: Stavo stands up, already drunk even though he is usually heavy weight. Goes for a knockout blow to the dwarf's head
  1394. [10:34:55 PM] Stavo: //d100
  1395. [10:34:59 PM] Tristan: kingofnothing44 rolled 1d100; result:
  1396. 88 +0
  1397. Sum: 88
  1398. [10:35:07 PM] Stavo: {Im too drunk lol}
  1399. [10:35:11 PM] Austin Terry: {I was really hoping a critical.}
  1400. [10:35:14 PM] Tristan: Stavo falls over, face-first.
  1401. [10:35:19 PM] Tristan: (Roll willpower to not pass out.)
  1402. [10:35:25 PM] Tristan: (Dillon, not Eddie.)
  1403. [10:35:30 PM] Stavo: //d100
  1404. [10:35:30 PM] Tristan: kingofnothing44 rolled 1d100; result:
  1405. 26 +0
  1406. Sum: 26
  1407. [10:35:32 PM] Eddie: As Stavo tumbles, Tode says to the Orc "I'll pay you in each individual one of your own teeth if you don't shut up."
  1408. [10:35:55 PM] Stavo: {Didnt pass out niggaaaaa}
  1409. [10:36:30 PM] Eddie: After saying so, Tode steps on Stavo's back.
  1410. [10:36:31 PM] Stavo: "Your beef is with me, Dwarf. Leave dish bartennar out of ish"
  1411. [10:36:32 PM] Tristan: (Are Thelis and Warden and Meddle still outside)
  1412. [10:36:38 PM] Eddie: (yes)
  1413. [10:36:38 PM] Austin Terry: {Yeah}
  1414. [10:36:53 PM] Tristan: (you guys can go inside you know)
  1415. [10:37:04 PM] Austin Terry: {I don't want shit to do with them.}
  1416. [10:37:07 PM] Tristan: (and since whether or not you sleep on the streets depends on Eddie getting the money from Dillon)
  1417. [10:37:09 PM] kuristina: Go inside the inn
  1418. [10:37:09 PM] andre 3000: Warden pushed the door open and walks inside.
  1419. [10:37:10 PM] Austin Terry: {They gettin' out of they own shit}
  1420. [10:37:23 PM] Austin Terry: {Meddle still has 5 gold}
  1421. [10:37:25 PM] Eddie: "If you don't give the gold, I'm making you a cripple."
  1422. [10:37:36 PM] Austin Terry: {And Thelis has like 8}
  1423. [10:37:39 PM] kuristina: [how much do rooms cost]
  1424. [10:37:47 PM] Eddie: (15 gold)
  1425. [10:37:50 PM] Tristan: Warden and Thelis look in to see a beefy, bearded midget wrestling with an equally beefy but taller black man on the floor, and a bartender looking very disappointed in his line of work.
  1426. [10:37:50 PM] kuristina: [wat]
  1427. [10:38:03 PM] Stavo: "You're a fat dwarf, aresh yer?"Stavo says in a drunken stupor. He attempts to push the dwarf off of him
  1428. [10:38:04 PM] Tristan: "Dis used to be a nice neighborhood," he says.
  1429. [10:38:15 PM | Edited 10:38:17 PM] Tristan: (Zachary mentioned you could get rooming for 15 earlier.)
  1430. [10:38:16 PM] Stavo: //d100
  1431. [10:38:17 PM] Tristan: kingofnothing44 rolled 1d100; result:
  1432. 22 +0
  1433. Sum: 22
  1434. [10:38:19 PM] kuristina: http://i1.ytimg.com/vi/4NiiHbJDUIE/hqdefault.jpg
  1435. [10:38:23 PM] Tristan: (Eddie payed attention.)
  1436. [10:38:38 PM] Eddie: Tode steps even harder on Stavo's back as he squirms. (roll to prevent him from bein gay)
  1437. [10:38:40 PM] Eddie: //d100
  1438. [10:38:54 PM] Tristan: live:eddiawesome rolled 1d100; result:
  1439. 35 +0
  1440. Sum: 35
  1441. [10:38:59 PM] Stavo: {ur gay}
  1442. [10:39:07 PM] Tristan: (Maybe so but he succeeded)
  1443. [10:39:19 PM] Tristan: (oh wait no he didn't lmao)
  1444. [10:39:23 PM] Eddie: (Yeah I didn't)
  1445. [10:39:28 PM] Eddie: (My stats are pretty low for a damn dwarf)
  1446. [10:39:40 PM] Austin Terry: {So is your height}
  1447. [10:39:44 PM] Eddie: (d@m)
  1448. [10:39:46 PM] kuristina: [my stats are p high for a dam human]
  1449. [10:39:46 PM] Stavo: {Pwnd}
  1450. [10:40:00 PM] Stavo: {and a gurl}
  1451. [10:40:04 PM] kuristina: [>sexist]
  1452. [10:40:05 PM] Eddie: (klmlaeoo)
  1453. [10:40:17 PM] Tristan: (REKT)
  1454. [10:40:18 PM] kuristina: [im a girl irl ok im offended]
  1455. [10:40:40 PM] Stavo: {such a mick diggles}
  1456. [10:40:44 PM] Stavo: {suck*}
  1457. [10:40:45 PM] kuristina: [ok]
  1458. [10:40:46 PM] Austin Terry: {>Joining a Skype with Dillon, me and Tristan}
  1459. {>Expect not to have sexist jokes}
  1460. [10:41:07 PM] Tristan: (I'm not sexist, I'm just a douche)
  1461. [10:41:12 PM] Eddie: (>joining a chat with 4 americans)
  1462. [10:41:16 PM] Austin Terry: {That's just stupid, like women's rights}
  1463. [10:41:19 PM] Eddie: (>not expecting sexism)
  1464. [10:41:22 PM] Tristan: (Five)
  1465. [10:41:24 PM] kuristina: [crying]
  1466. [10:41:30 PM] Tristan: (ANYWAY)
  1467. [10:41:35 PM] Tristan: (Back 2 th show)
  1468. [10:41:36 PM] Eddie: (oh i thought miggle was conandian too)
  1469. [10:41:37 PM] Austin Terry: {At least we don't write fanfic on Mordecai, Rigby, Edd, Ed, and Eddy}
  1470. [10:41:42 PM] Tristan: (nah hes just gay lmao)
  1471. [10:41:44 PM] Tristan: (rekt)
  1472. [10:41:54 PM] kuristina: [IM NOT A HE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!]
  1473. [10:41:58 PM] andre 3000: [keep it moving]
  1474. [10:42:16 PM] Austin Terry: {We should leave Kuristina alone. I think he's getting mad.}
  1475. [10:42:19 PM] kuristina: [im a kawaii onnanoko]
  1476. [10:42:34 PM] Eddie: Tode stumbles backward as Stavo manages to wrestle free from the ground.
  1477. [10:43:25 PM] Stavo: "You wansh yer money, you gotta-" {Ima do another willpower to not pass out}
  1478. [10:43:29 PM] Stavo: //d100
  1479. [10:43:29 PM] Tristan: kingofnothing44 rolled 1d100; result:
  1480. 45 +0
  1481. Sum: 45
  1482. [10:43:34 PM] Eddie: (welp)
  1483. [10:43:44 PM] Stavo: {I passed out}
  1484. [10:43:50 PM] Tristan: Stavo crashes into the floorboards, snoozing.
  1485. [10:45:16 PM] andre 3000: Warden shrugs.
  1486. [10:45:33 PM] Eddie: "Well, then."
  1487. [10:45:50 PM] Austin Terry: {That poor bartender}
  1488. [10:45:52 PM] Eddie: Tode snatches the gold from the sleeping Stavo and puts it in his bag.
  1489. [10:46:06 PM] kuristina: [WOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW]
  1490. [10:46:12 PM] kuristina: [DILLON IS METAGAMING ME]
  1491. [10:46:20 PM] Tristan: (more like metagay)
  1492. [10:46:25 PM] andre 3000: [1/26/2014, 11:53:17 PM] Stavo: drag my body with you ;_;
  1493. [10:46:27 PM] andre 3000: wow
  1494. [10:46:32 PM] Stavo: {I DONT KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS BUT I WANNA FEEL INCLUDED}
  1495. [10:46:39 PM] Eddie: "I'm going to the inn to pay for our rooms."
  1496. [10:46:43 PM] Stavo: {I DID THE SAME TO EDDI TO MOVE FORWARD WITH THE PLOT}
  1497. [10:46:56 PM] andre 3000: Warden attempts to drag the unconcious man to the rooms.
  1498. [10:47:00 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  1499. [10:47:00 PM] Eddie: "Warden. Carry."
  1500. [10:47:02 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  1501. 36 +0
  1502. Sum: 36
  1503. [10:47:04 PM] kuristina: "We won't have enough for all the rooms."
  1504. [10:47:07 PM] Eddie: Tode points to Stavo.
  1505. [10:47:07 PM] andre 3000: [success]
  1506. [10:47:23 PM] Eddie: "Some of us will sleep in the same room."
  1507. [10:47:26 PM] Eddie: "Big deal."
  1508. [10:47:30 PM] kuristina: "Nobody sleeps with me."
  1509. [10:47:34 PM] Eddie: "You're not special."
  1510. [10:47:37 PM] Stavo: {homophobe}
  1511. [10:47:39 PM] Eddie: "You can deal with it."
  1512. [10:47:42 PM] Tristan: "15 buys a room. You'll all be sleeping in the same room," the Bartender says, sniffing.
  1513. [10:47:48 PM] Austin Terry: "I'll sleep on a bed of books"
  1514. [10:47:49 PM] kuristina: "What?"
  1515. [10:47:55 PM] Eddie: "We can buy multiple, Orc."
  1516. [10:47:58 PM] Stavo: "ZZZ"
  1517. [10:47:58 PM] Eddie: "We have enough gold."
  1518. [10:48:08 PM] Tristan: "How much?"
  1519. [10:48:11 PM] andre 3000: [i drag the dude into the room i was successful maccus]
  1520. [10:48:20 PM] Eddie: "Unless Stavo spent all of his on beer."
  1521. [10:48:33 PM] Austin Terry: "I don't think that information is worth giving out."
  1522. [10:48:36 PM] Stavo: {just 3}
  1523. [10:48:42 PM] Tristan: Warden throws Stavo into a room, getting thick lines of drool all over his unconscious body.
  1524. [10:48:53 PM] Eddie: "We should have enough for two rooms."
  1525. [10:48:55 PM] Stavo: {sick}
  1526. [10:49:16 PM] Tristan: (Dannos check your PMs)
  1527. [10:49:16 PM] Eddie: "In one room, two of us will sleep, in another, three."
  1528. [10:49:53 PM] Eddie: "It's basic addition. Probably lost to your kind, orc."
  1529. [10:50:03 PM] kuristina: "Well, OK. But if I HAVE to be in the same room as someone, I'd rather it be Bookworm. He's seems like the -cleanest- one here. And he's obviously not into women anyway."
  1530. [10:50:03 PM] andre 3000: [roll to ask where I sleep]
  1531. [10:50:06 PM] Stavo: {OWND}
  1532. [10:50:08 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  1533. [10:50:08 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  1534. 56 +0
  1535. Sum: 56
  1536. [10:50:15 PM] Tristan: The orc frowns.
  1537. [10:50:25 PM] Austin Terry: "I'm a Literasexual, thank you."
  1538. [10:50:31 PM] kuristina: "See, not me."
  1539. [10:50:33 PM] Tristan: Warden attempts to talk, but his eyes go wide again, as he vomits all over Stavo.
  1540. [10:50:36 PM] Stavo: {LOL}
  1541. [10:50:37 PM] Eddie: "We will draw straws to see who sleeps in the same room as the ugly annoying woman."
  1542. [10:50:44 PM] kuristina: "I'm not ugly!"
  1543. [10:50:50 PM] Eddie: "Your face says otherwise."
  1544. [10:50:57 PM] kuristina: "Shut up."
  1545. [10:51:09 PM] Stavo: {So harsh lol}
  1546. [10:51:10 PM] Eddie: "You smell."
  1547. [10:51:14 PM] kuristina: "You're a dwarf, you're not used to women without beards."
  1548. [10:51:15 PM] Austin Terry: Despite reading his Orc book, Meddle screams,"OOOOH!"
  1549. [10:51:26 PM] Tristan: "Just bang already, Christ" the Bartender says.
  1550. [10:51:28 PM] Eddie: "I'm not into dwarf women, I find black human meat very tantalizing."
  1551. [10:51:45 PM] andre 3000: Warden stares at the dwarf.
  1552. [10:51:49 PM] Eddie: "Although my heart belongs to another."
  1553. [10:51:54 PM] Eddie: "Juan... Where are you?"
  1554. [10:51:58 PM] Stavo: {Oh shi-}
  1555. [10:52:04 PM] Austin Terry: "Mine belongs to Hester Prynne"
  1556. [10:52:11 PM] Tristan: (meddle best character)
  1557. [10:52:18 PM] kuristina: [^]
  1558. [10:52:19 PM] Stavo: {^}
  1559. [10:52:22 PM] Eddie: A single tear rolls down Tode's cheek as memories flood back to his sombrero wearing lover.
  1560. [10:52:38 PM] kuristina: Thelis slowly backs away from Tode.
  1561. [10:52:49 PM] Eddie: "But enough about that."
  1562. [10:52:52 PM] Austin Terry: Meddle stares vacantly in to the background, thinking back to her public shaming, doing all he can not to cry for her.
  1563. [10:52:52 PM] Eddie: "We must buy our rooms."
  1564. [10:53:02 PM] Eddie: "TO THE INN!"
  1565. [10:53:07 PM] kuristina: [wait is meddle a girl?????]
  1566. [10:53:18 PM] Austin Terry: {Whut? No?}
  1567. [10:53:28 PM] kuristina: [oh wait youre referring to thelis]
  1568. [10:53:34 PM] kuristina: [lol]
  1569. [10:53:36 PM] Austin Terry: {I'm referring to Hester Prynne}
  1570. [10:53:40 PM] Eddie: (Hester, dummy)
  1571. [10:53:44 PM] kuristina: [wait who the fuck si that]
  1572. [10:53:55 PM] kuristina: [THELIS GOT PUBLICLY SHAMED TOO.,,........]
  1573. [10:53:56 PM] Austin Terry: {Read a book once in a while. GAWD}
  1574. [10:54:02 PM] Eddie: (A book character, Miggle)
  1575. [10:54:05 PM] Eddie: (Jesus.)
  1576. [10:54:06 PM] Austin Terry: {Everytime you roll, you're publicly shamed}
  1577. [10:54:15 PM] kuristina: *cry
  1578. [10:54:22 PM] Tristan: (you're in the inn you dumb nigga)
  1579. [10:54:33 PM] Eddie: "Oh. We're already here."
  1580. [10:54:39 PM] Eddie: "Everyone, pool up your gold for the rooms."
  1581. [10:54:49 PM] kuristina: "I've 8 gold."
  1582. [10:54:54 PM] Tristan: "Now who's dumb, dwarf?"
  1583. [10:55:02 PM] Austin Terry: Meddle reaches in to his pocket and absentmindedly hands him his 5 gold, studying another page of the Orc book."
  1584. [10:55:10 PM] Stavo: {Eddi's character has alzheimers}
  1585. [10:55:19 PM] andre 3000: [roll to talk about lost love, PUNCHA the spiked brass knucks]
  1586. [10:55:20 PM] Austin Terry: {^} {Canon}
  1587. [10:55:21 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  1588. [10:55:26 PM] Eddie: "I have mild short term memory loss when it comes to the times I deal with orcs."
  1589. [10:55:27 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  1590. 8 +0
  1591. Sum: 8
  1592. [10:55:32 PM] Eddie: "It helps me cope with the murder."
  1593. [10:55:34 PM] andre 3000: [successssss]
  1594. [10:55:48 PM] Stavo: {Stop trying to be bad, eddie. Its not going to happen}
  1595. [10:55:55 PM] Stavo: "Snort"
  1596. [10:55:58 PM] Eddie: Tode slams his bag full of 28 gold on the counter.
  1597. [10:56:08 PM] Tristan: "ME LOVE PUNCH SPIKE," Warden screams.
  1598. [10:56:35 PM] Eddie: "With this we should only need two of Meddle's gold."
  1599. [10:56:57 PM] Stavo: {Eddi jerks to math problems}
  1600. [10:57:15 PM] Eddie: (Tode is ridiculously autistic.)
  1601. [10:57:16 PM] Austin Terry: {I love lamp}
  1602. [10:57:28 PM] Eddie: (He thinks everything through with math, duh???)
  1603. [10:57:49 PM] Eddie: (I base him off of Errorage)
  1604. [10:58:00 PM] Eddie: (Only cooler and more gay)
  1605. [10:58:07 PM] Tristan: (i had my eyes on lamp first back off buddy)
  1606. [10:58:28 PM] Eddie: "So, can we have our room?"
  1607. [10:58:32 PM] Tristan: "Sure."
  1608. [10:58:35 PM] Eddie: "Okay."
  1609. [10:58:38 PM] Eddie: "Now for the straws."
  1610. [10:58:41 PM] Tristan: "Don't make too much noise and don't make a mess."
  1611. [10:58:42 PM] Eddie: "Give us straws, Orc!"
  1612. [10:58:59 PM] Tristan: The Orc passes five bendy straws over the counter, before disappearing into the kitchen.
  1613. [10:59:06 PM] Austin Terry: Meddle, finally looking up. "I also had one more love..." It was obvious he hasn't relized the lapse of time. "He went by the name of Coach Browd..."
  1614. [10:59:10 PM] Eddie: Tode picks them all up and faces the group.
  1615. [10:59:15 PM] Tristan: (>Browd)
  1616. [10:59:17 PM] Stavo: {>Bendy straws}
  1617. [10:59:17 PM] Tristan: (Nice.)
  1618. [10:59:20 PM] Austin Terry: {Thanks}
  1619. [10:59:26 PM] Eddie: "This should work!"
  1620. [10:59:29 PM] Eddie: "Kind of."
  1621. [10:59:42 PM] Eddie: "I hope these things vary in size."
  1622. [10:59:45 PM] Eddie: (Everyone should roll)
  1623. [10:59:53 PM] Austin Terry: {Roll what, out of 5?}
  1624. [10:59:54 PM] Eddie: (Warden rolls twice)
  1625. [11:00:01 PM] Tristan: (1d100, highest has to shack up with Thelis)
  1626. [11:00:05 PM] Tristan: (Obviously Thelis doesn't roll)
  1627. [11:00:09 PM] Austin Terry: //d100
  1628. [11:00:09 PM] Tristan: narkdom rolled 1d100; result:
  1629. 35 +0
  1630. Sum: 35
  1631. [11:00:11 PM] Eddie: //d100
  1632. [11:00:11 PM] Tristan: live:eddiawesome rolled 1d100; result:
  1633. 55 +0
  1634. Sum: 55
  1635. [11:00:13 PM] Austin Terry: {YES}
  1636. [11:00:17 PM] Austin Terry: {I'M SAFE}
  1637. [11:00:20 PM] Eddie: (GO WARDEN GO)
  1638. [11:00:21 PM] kuristina: [>safe]
  1639. [11:00:24 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  1640. [11:00:24 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  1641. 89 +0
  1642. Sum: 89
  1643. [11:00:28 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  1644. [11:00:28 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  1645. 67 +0
  1646. Sum: 67
  1647. [11:00:34 PM] andre 3000: [what are we rolling]
  1648. [11:00:36 PM] Austin Terry: {So, me, Eddie and Danno}
  1649. [11:00:38 PM] Tristan: (don't actually roll twice nigga)
  1650. [11:00:38 PM] Stavo: {Im knocked out..}
  1651. [11:00:46 PM] Tristan: (OH YEAH)
  1652. [11:00:48 PM] Tristan: (DUH)
  1653. [11:00:51 PM] Tristan: (JUST THROW DILLON IN THERE)
  1654. [11:00:53 PM] Eddie: (Second roll is dildon's.)
  1655. [11:00:58 PM] Eddie: (Warden shacks with Thelis.)
  1656. [11:01:03 PM] kuristina: [nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo]
  1657. [11:01:10 PM] andre 3000: [fuk u miggl]
  1658. [11:01:11 PM] Eddie: "Looks like big guy gets to go with you, ugly!"
  1659. [11:01:18 PM] Tristan: (at least warden's too dumb to attempt to seduce you)
  1660. [11:01:22 PM] andre 3000: Warden turns and grins at buttpirate.
  1661. [11:01:26 PM] Tristan: (... or is he? ?? ?)
  1662. [11:01:32 PM] Stavo: {>buttpirate}
  1663. [11:01:34 PM] andre 3000: [ ; - ) ]
  1664. [11:01:40 PM] kuristina: Thelis groans. "Just don't get near me."
  1665. [11:01:41 PM] Eddie: "Warden, put Stavo in our room."
  1666. [11:01:49 PM] Eddie: "Come on, Meddle."
  1667. [11:01:51 PM] andre 3000: Warden nods.
  1668. [11:02:00 PM] andre 3000: [attempt to toss Stavo into room]
  1669. [11:02:03 PM] andre 3000: //d100
  1670. [11:02:03 PM] Tristan: cowskee rolled 1d100; result:
  1671. 9 +0
  1672. Sum: 9
  1673. [11:02:06 PM] Eddie: Tode heads to the room. "Don't forget your gold, Meddle!"
  1674. [11:02:07 PM] andre 3000: [ B) ]
  1675. [11:02:28 PM | Edited 11:02:48 PM] Tristan: Warden throws Stavo into one of the rooms, sending him feet-first through a bed, destroying it.
  1676. [11:02:29 PM | Edited 11:03:04 PM] Austin Terry: Meddle is thrown through a bed. It's metal as fuck.
  1677. [11:02:32 PM] Austin Terry: [Or that}
  1678. [11:02:38 PM] Tristan: (my bad)
  1679. [11:02:49 PM] Tristan: (TYPO)
  1680. [11:02:51 PM | Edited 11:04:20 PM] Austin Terry: Meddle finally puts his book in his bag, grabbing his remaining gold off the counter and goes to the room.
  1681. [11:03:12 PM] Austin Terry: {There}
  1682. [11:03:29 PM] Eddie: (I think you're confused, it was Stavo that was thrown.)
  1683. [11:03:33 PM] Stavo: {What just happened}
  1684. [11:03:33 PM] Austin Terry: {God damnit}
  1685. [11:03:36 PM] Tristan: (I was confused too)
  1686. [11:03:37 PM] Austin Terry: {I'm not sure}
  1687. [11:03:43 PM] Tristan: (but I went to a special camp and it got sorted out)
  1688. [11:03:48 PM] Eddie: (is there one bed per room)
  1689. [11:03:49 PM] Austin Terry: {Do I need to change mine back?}
  1690. [11:03:53 PM] Austin Terry: {Hah}
  1691. [11:03:53 PM] Tristan: (ye)
  1692. [11:03:57 PM] Eddie: (jesus christ)
  1693. [11:04:03 PM] Eddie: "Gods damnit!"
  1694. [11:04:16 PM] Eddie: "I guess we sleep on the floor tonight."
  1695. [11:04:25 PM] Austin Terry: {There}
  1696. [11:04:29 PM] Eddie: "That ugly cow's bride has it lucky."
  1697. [11:04:32 PM] kuristina: "Same goes for you, Warden. I get the bed."
  1698. [11:04:37 PM] Stavo: Speaking of bed
  1699. [11:04:40 PM] Tristan: (Wouldn't there be two beds to a room)
  1700. [11:04:43 PM] andre 3000: Warden grunts and lays down.
  1701. [11:04:44 PM] Stavo: We should end it here
  1702. [11:04:50 PM] Stavo: And go to bed
  1703. [11:04:51 PM] Stavo: irl
  1704. [11:04:55 PM | Edited 11:04:57 PM] kuristina: fugoff
  1705. [11:04:59 PM] Eddie: (I agree, I have an appointment.)
  1706. [11:05:06 PM] Eddie: (Two, actually.)
  1707. [11:05:07 PM] andre 3000: yeah it's late
  1708. [11:05:08 PM] Stavo: Eddi has to put on ointment
  1709. [11:05:25 PM] Tristan: (I agree too)
  1710. [11:05:26 PM] Austin Terry: {He rubbed too hard}
  1711. [11:05:29 PM] Austin Terry: {And pulled some skin off}
  1712. [11:05:32 PM] Tristan: ________________________________________________________________
  1713. [11:05:33 PM] Stavo: He ripped the skin
  1714. [11:05:34 PM] kuristina: i disagree but ok
  1715. [11:05:34 PM] Tristan: so
  1716. [11:05:36 PM] Tristan: barring Eddie
  1717. [11:05:39 PM] Eddie: That was fun
  1718. [11:05:43 PM] Austin Terry: Srsly.
  1719. [11:05:43 PM] Tristan: how was everyone's first time?
  1720. [11:05:45 PM] Stavo: Miggles we love you
  1721. [11:05:45 PM] andre 3000: [im down for like 30 minutes more and thats it
  1722. [11:05:47 PM] andre 3000: its good
  1723. [11:05:50 PM] Stavo: But in merica we have school
  1724. [11:05:51 PM] kuristina: good
  1725. [11:05:52 PM] Austin Terry: You were so good, Tristan ;)
  1726. [11:05:56 PM] kuristina: i dont have school lol
  1727. [11:05:58 PM] Tristan: ;) was i gentle
  1728. [11:06:04 PM] kuristina: windchill
  1729. [11:06:05 PM] Tristan: how long were we playing?
  1730. [11:06:06 PM] kuristina: tomorrow
  1731. [11:06:08 PM] Stavo: Tristan i cried everytime
  1732. [11:06:10 PM] Eddie: Like three hours, Tristan.
  1733. [11:06:11 PM] Austin Terry: A couple hours.
  1734. [11:06:12 PM] kuristina: -25f
  1735. [11:06:16 PM] Stavo: 3 hours
  1736. [11:06:29 PM] kuristina: also fug u eddie
  1737. [11:06:29 PM] Eddie: We get XP?
  1738. [11:06:32 PM] kuristina: thelis is a waifu
  1739. [11:06:37 PM] Tristan: We started at 8:04 and ended at 11:0something
  1740. [11:06:43 PM] Tristan: So for 3 hours we have 300 exp each
  1741. [11:06:43 PM] Austin Terry: 11:04, actually
  1742. [11:06:47 PM] andre 3000: it's 12:13 4 me
  1743. [11:06:50 PM] Stavo: LVL UP
  1744. [11:06:50 PM] Tristan: Tomorrow I'll teach y'all niggas how to level up.
  1745. [11:06:54 PM] Austin Terry: I've got 600 XP now
  1746. [11:06:59 PM] Stavo: Im level 20 now
  1747. [11:06:59 PM] Eddie: Got 700 now
  1748. [11:07:00 PM] Stavo: Suck it
  1749. [11:07:13 PM] kuristina: 600
  1750. [11:07:14 PM] andre 3000: what
  1751. [11:07:16 PM] andre 3000: wait
  1752. [11:07:17 PM] Eddie: I STILL don't know how to level up
  1753. [11:07:21 PM] andre 3000: how do i know how much i have
  1754. [11:07:23 PM] kuristina: check your char page danno
  1755. [11:07:27 PM] kuristina: starting + 300
  1756. [11:07:32 PM] Tristan: that's because you always got me to level you up eddie
  1757. [11:07:36 PM] Tristan: because you never read the rulebook
  1758. [11:07:42 PM] Eddie: And I still never will
  1759. [11:07:44 PM] Tristan: which is honestly probably what I'm gonna have to do for everyone
  1760. [11:07:46 PM] Eddie: :#
  1761. [11:07:50 PM] andre 3000: i have 400 starting xp
  1762. [11:07:57 PM] Eddie: You could just guide us through it
  1763. [11:08:01 PM] andre 3000: i add 300?
  1764. [11:08:04 PM] Stavo: me too
  1765. [11:08:05 PM] Tristan: you'd have to have the book handy
  1766. [11:08:06 PM] kuristina: 700 xp danno
  1767. [11:08:07 PM] Eddie: Like you did with me and Shadowrun
  1768. [11:08:12 PM] Eddie: I didn't have the book for Shadowrun ready
  1769. [11:08:17 PM] andre 3000: ok done
  1770. [11:08:31 PM] Tristan: that was for character creation though, not levelling up
  1771. [11:08:36 PM] Tristan: anyway, I'm off to bed
  1772. [11:08:37 PM] Tristan: night niggas
  1773. [11:08:38 PM] kuristina: http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lgh3rsmNtj1qect7zo1_500.jpg
  1774. [11:08:44 PM] Tristan: #MeddleBestCharacter
  1775. [11:08:47 PM] kuristina: ^^^
  1776. [11:08:49 PM] Austin Terry: #Yay
  1777. [11:08:50 PM] kuristina: meddle is the bomb
  1778. [11:09:01 PM] Austin Terry: I'll keep up the roleplay
  1779. [11:09:04 PM] Eddie: u
  1780. [11:09:05 PM] Eddie: g
  1781. [11:09:05 PM] Eddie: l
  1782. [11:09:05 PM] Eddie: y
  1783. [11:09:14 PM] kuristina: >not wanting 2 fuq thelis
  1784. [11:09:18 PM] Austin Terry: I'm gonna actually pay attention to him in class to know how to deal with some situations.
  1785. [11:09:27 PM] Eddie: JUAN IS THE ONLY PERSON WHO LOOKS LIKE/IS A MAN FOR ME, THANK YOU
  1786. [11:09:33 PM] andre 3000: boobies
  1787. [11:09:38 PM] Stavo: dude looks like a lady
  1788. [11:09:47 PM] kuristina: its r63 of a dude
  1789. [11:09:51 PM] kuristina: so yea
  1790. [11:09:55 PM] kuristina: wait
  1791. [11:10:05 PM] Eddie: dube loks lige a ladye
  1792. [11:10:11 PM] kuristina: no that is a girl, but its r63
  1793. [11:10:20 PM] kuristina: so it would normally be a guy
  1794. [11:10:30 PM] andre 3000: dube
  1795. [11:10:36 PM] kuristina: wat is this
  1796. [11:10:37 PM] Eddie: it's gay is what it is
  1797. [11:10:38 PM] Eddie: and also ugly
  1798. [11:10:39 PM] kuristina: sbahj
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